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Category: Dating & Love

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  • How To Avoid The Friend-Zone: Underpinned Scientific Strategies

    How To Avoid The Friend-Zone: Underpinned Scientific Strategies

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    Written by dating coach for men Gary Gunn – Founder of Social Attraction

    In this article, I will teach you how to avoid the friend-zone with women you find attractive.

    This includes explaining what you are doing wrong, and then giving you simple steps to success.

    📖 Keep reading to transform your dating life and don’t forget to subscribe to my newsletter for more advice.

    The Invisible Attraction

    The first key player in the science of attraction is pheromones.

    • These are chemical substances secreted by humans and animals, which are perceived by the olfactory system and trigger a response in the receiver.
    • In the context of human attraction, pheromones play a vital role in signaling compatibility and genetic fitness to potential mates.

    To increase your chances of attracting a romantic partner, maintain good hygiene and grooming habits, which can help your natural pheromones to be more easily detected.

    Avoid these common mistakes:

    • Neglecting Personal Hygiene: Men should never neglect their personal hygiene, as poor hygiene can mask or hinder the effectiveness of their natural pheromones. Regular showering, using deodorant, and maintaining oral hygiene are essential in presenting an attractive, clean appearance that allows your pheromones to be perceived more readily.
    • Overusing Artificial Fragrances: Men should avoid overusing colognes, perfumes, or heavily scented products that can overpower or interfere with their natural pheromones. While using fragrance in moderation can enhance attractiveness, excessive use may mask the subtle signals your body sends through pheromones, reducing their effectiveness in attracting potential romantic partners.

    The Love Drug

    Dopamine, known as the “love drug,” is a neurotransmitter responsible for reward and pleasure in the brain.

    • When you’re attracted to someone, your brain releases dopamine, creating a feeling of excitement and happiness.
    • To increase dopamine levels and enhance attraction, engage in exciting and novel activities with your potential romantic interest.

    This can create an association between these pleasurable experiences and your presence, increasing your chances of avoiding the friend zone.

    Avoid these common mistakes:

    • Over-sharing Personal Information: Men should avoid revealing too much personal information too quickly when trying to establish a romantic connection. Sharing intimate details or sensitive topics prematurely can make the other person feel uncomfortable and overwhelmed.
    • Being Completely Guarded: Conversely, men should not be overly secretive or closed off when getting to know someone. Failing to open up or share anything about yourself can make it difficult for the other person to establish trust and emotional intimacy, hindering the development of a romantic relationship.

    The Bonding Hormone

    Oxytocin is a hormone known for its role in bonding, trust, and attachment.

    • It’s often referred to as the “cuddle hormone” because it’s released during physical touch, like hugging and cuddling.
    • Oxytocin helps deepen connections and create strong emotional bonds.

    To foster the release of oxytocin, engage in appropriate physical touch and emotional intimacy with your potential partner, but remember to respect their boundaries and communicate openly about your intentions.

    Avoid these common mistakes:

    • Ignoring Boundaries: Men should never disregard the personal boundaries of their potential partner, whether it’s related to physical touch, emotional intimacy, or personal space. Disrespecting someone’s boundaries can create discomfort and mistrust, damaging the potential for a deep connection.
    • Overstepping Comfort Levels: Men should also avoid pushing their potential partner to engage in activities or discussions that they are clearly uncomfortable with. Forcing someone into situations they’re not ready for can lead to feelings of unease and resentment, hindering the development of a healthy relationship. Always communicate openly and ensure both parties are comfortable with the pace and direction of the relationship.

    The Confidence Booster

    Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that plays a significant role in regulating mood, social behavior, and self-esteem.

    • High levels of serotonin are associated with feelings of confidence and well-being.
    • To increase serotonin levels, engage in regular exercise, eat a balanced diet, and practice self-care.

    By boosting your confidence and well-being, you’ll be more likely to attract a romantic partner and avoid the friend zone.

    Avoid these common mistakes:

    • Neglecting Self-Care: Men should never neglect self-care and personal well-being, as it can negatively impact their confidence and overall mental and emotional health. Prioritizing self-care helps maintain a positive self-image and ensures you present your best self when interacting with potential romantic partners.
    • Excessive Bragging: Men should avoid boasting excessively about their achievements or possessions in an attempt to impress potential partners. While it’s essential to showcase your accomplishments, overdoing it can come across as arrogant or insincere, diminishing your attractiveness and potentially driving others away. Instead, focus on building genuine connections based on shared interests and mutual respect.

    The Power of Hormones

    Testosterone, the primary male sex hormone, is known to influence attraction, assertiveness, and competitiveness.

    • Higher levels of testosterone can enhance your attractiveness and assertiveness.
    • It helps you to take initiative and express your romantic interest more effectively.

    To increase testosterone levels naturally, focus on a healthy diet, regular exercise, and quality sleep.

    Avoid these common mistakes:

    • Resorting to Steroids or Hormone Abuse: Men should never resort to using steroids or other hormone-enhancing substances in an attempt to artificially boost testosterone levels. These substances can have serious short-term and long-term health consequences, negatively impacting physical and mental well-being.
    • Overly Dominant Behavior: While testosterone may influence assertiveness and competitiveness, men should avoid becoming overly dominant or controlling in their interactions with potential romantic partners. This type of behavior can be off-putting and intimidating, leading to damaged relationships and a decreased likelihood of establishing a meaningful connection. Instead, aim for a balance between assertiveness and respect for the other person’s autonomy and boundaries.

    Conclusion

    • The world of science provides valuable insights into human attraction and bonding.
    • You can increase your chances of building a romantic connection and avoiding the friend zone.
    • Maintain good hygiene, engage in exciting activities, foster emotional intimacy and boost your confidence.

    Never Be Friend-Zoned By Women Again!

    Discover how you can use these lessons in the real world with women you find attractive.

    I can coach you to have extreme self-confidence in your dating life and get the success you desire.

    🔥 Explore My Life-Changing Courses Now! 🔥

    Resources

    1. Havlicek, J., & Roberts, S. C. (2009). MHC-correlated mate choice in humans: A review. Psychoneuroendocrinology, 34(4), 497-512.
    2. Fisher, H. E., Aron, A., & Brown, L. L. (2006). Romantic love: a mammalian brain system for mate choice. Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society B: Biological Sciences, 361(1476), 2173-2186.
    3. Uvnäs-Moberg, K., Handlin, L., & Petersson, M. (2014). Self-soothing behaviors with particular reference to oxytocin release induced by non-noxious sensory stimulation.

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    Gary Gunn

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  • The Basics of Lawn Care for Your Commercial Property – Morning Lazziness

    The Basics of Lawn Care for Your Commercial Property – Morning Lazziness

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    When it comes to maintaining a healthy, attractive commercial property in Texas, proper lawn care is essential. A well-maintained lawn can add value to your property and create a great first impression for visitors or anyone passing by. This article will provide an overview of the basics of lawn care including the types of grasses used, mowing techniques, fertilizing, and weed control. With this information in hand, you’ll be well on your way to having a healthy lawn that will add value to your commercial property.

    #1 Types of Grasses

    The type of grass used on your property will depend on the climate and soil conditions in your area. It’s important to research the different types of grasses that are suitable for your area so you can choose one that is both drought-tolerant and disease resistant. Some common varieties include fescue, bluegrass, Bermuda, and St. Augustine. Once you’ve selected the right type of grass, you can begin to maintain it with proper mowing and fertilization.

    #2 Mowing Techniques

    To keep your lawn looking its best, it’s important to mow on a regular basis. The height at which you mow depends on the type of grass you have and the time of year. Generally speaking, the higher you mow during the summer months, the better. This helps to promote healthy growth and prevent weeds from taking over. When it comes to mowing, it’s important to use sharp blades and avoid scalping the grass. Most importantly, make sure you mow in rows that are parallel to each other for a neat look.

    #3 Fertilizing and Weed Control

    Fertilize your lawn to promote healthy growth and prevent weeds from taking over. Be sure to use the right type of fertilizer for the grass type you have on your property. It’s also important to apply fertilizer at the right time of year. Weed control is an important part of lawn care as well. The best way to prevent weeds from taking over is to keep your grass healthy and mowed regularly. If weeds do occur, you can use a herbicide or spot-treat with a weed killer.

    #4 Watering

    Regularly watering your lawn is essential for keeping it healthy and vibrant. The amount of water you need to give your lawn will depend on the type of grass you have, as well as the climate and soil conditions in your area. Some types of grass require more frequent watering than others. For example, Bermuda grass needs frequent watering during hot summer months while fescue requires less frequent watering.

    #4 Professional Lawn Care Services

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    If you don’t have the time or knowledge to care for your lawn on your own, several professional lawn care services in Houston can help. Experts like Heroes Lawn Care in Houston,TX offer a variety of services, including mowing, fertilizing, and weed control. With their expertise and resources, they can ensure that your lawn is always looking its best.

    Additional Tips

    • Water your lawn regularly, but don’t overwater it.

    • Aerate your lawn every few years to help promote healthy growth.

    • Remove fallen leaves and other debris on a regular basis.

    • Keep an eye out for pests or diseases that could damage the grass.

    • Check with local regulations regarding the use of herbicides and pesticides.

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    These are just a few of the basics of lawn care for your commercial property. With the right knowledge and resources, you can ensure that your lawn will look great all year round. A few good practices and professional services can go a long way in promoting a healthy, attractive lawn. With the right care, your Texas property will become an oasis of beauty that you can enjoy for years to come.

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    Shruti Sood

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  • Landscape Lighting to Make Your Home Look More Beautiful – Morning Lazziness

    Landscape Lighting to Make Your Home Look More Beautiful – Morning Lazziness

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    Landscape lighting can be the perfect way to make your Texas home look and feel beautiful in the evening. Not only can it help you create a stunning nighttime view, but landscape lighting also provides added security and convenience around your property. In this article, we’ll discuss why landscape lighting is important, how to choose the right fixtures for your space, as well as some tips on installation. We hope you find this information helpful!

    Benefits of Landscape Lighting

    It offers numerous benefits beyond just making your home look beautiful. For starters, lighting adds an extra layer of security around your home by illuminating dark areas and reducing the chance of potential break-ins or other criminal activity. Additionally, installing lighting can help to increase your home’s curb appeal, which can be beneficial if you plan on selling in the future.

    Choosing the Right Fixtures

    When it comes to choosing the right fixtures for your outdoor space, there are several factors to consider. Firstly, think about what kind of look you want your lighting to achieve; do you prefer a subtle glow or something more dramatic? Once you’ve determined the desired effect, you can then consider different fixture options like wall-mounted lights, path lights, spotlights, and more. Additionally, pay attention to the wattage of each light as well as its color temperature so that everything looks consistent and works together harmoniously.

    Install outdoor lighting for your home with Blingle in Houston, TX. With so many lighting options to choose from, you can find the perfect fixtures for your outdoor space and make your home look beautiful. Install suitable outdoor lighting

    Types of Landscape Lighting

    1: Path Lights

    This lighting would surely make your pathways more attractive, inviting, and safe. Path lights are typically low-voltage fixtures that can be placed along the edges of a garden path or walkway. These fixtures usually come with stakes, so you can easily insert them into the ground, making installation quite easy.

    2: Spotlights & Floodlights

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    These types of lighting are ideal for highlighting specific features in your yard, such as trees, sculptures, or even benches. Spotlights and floodlights provide a powerful beam of light to draw attention to certain elements while casting an overall warm glow across your outdoor space. They’re also perfect for providing additional security around your property during the evening hours.

    3: Wall-Mounted Lights

    Wall-mounted lights are ideal for adding ambiance and functionality to an outdoor space. These types of fixtures are perfect for illuminating pathways, steps, decks, or other areas that need additional lighting. They’re also extremely easy to install since they simply mount onto the wall – no hard wiring necessary!

    4: Step Lights

    Step lights are small and unobtrusive fixtures that can be installed along the edges of steps for added visibility. These types of lights are especially useful for illuminating dark areas, such as stairways or walkways around your property. Additionally, step lights provide a subtle yet beautiful effect when combined with other lighting fixtures.

    5: Tree Lights

    Tree lights are an excellent way to add a subtle glow to your outdoor space. These lights can be used to wrap around the trunk of a tree or even hung from its branches for a magical effect. Tree lights also provide additional lighting for pathways, which is great for safety and security purposes as well.

    Installation Tips

    Installing lighting doesn’t have to be complicated – but it does require some careful planning! Start by choosing the right fixtures based on your desired look, then measure the space you’ll be working with so you know exactly how much wiring you need. Additionally, make sure that all fixtures are properly grounded and use waterproof connectors when connecting them together. Finally, remember to test each fixture before completing your installation to ensure that everything is working properly.

    Landscape lighting can be a great way to add some personality and charm to your outdoor space. With the right fixtures and proper installation, you can create an inviting atmosphere that both looks beautiful and provides additional safety and security around your Houston home. 

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    Shruti Sood

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  • 15 Signs Your Marriage Is Worth Saving

    15 Signs Your Marriage Is Worth Saving

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    Months or years after your marriage – the “honeymoon” phase is indeed over. 

    You start seeing the not-so-good qualities that your spouse has. Quite annoying, don’t you agree? 

    You start getting irritated with how your spouse snores, you begin to notice how messy they are around the house – and that is just the start. 

    You will soon start having issues and major ones too, don’t give up just yet, but still question, “Is my marriage worth saving?”

    Don’t say or think about divorce just because you are getting fed up. Instead, think of the signs your marriage is worth saving and from there, do something about it.

    Can our marriage be saved?

    Okay, so once you question, “Is my marriage worth saving?” your marriage is on the rocks – we perfectly understand. 

    After all, there is no such thing as a “perfect” marriage. 

    You are probably more inclined to start thinking of giving up and filing for a divorce, right? It’s an easier option, and you are no longer happy but wait! 

    If you are taking time to contemplate divorce, have you also taken time to think about all of the signs your marriage is worth saving? 

    Can my marriage be saved? Is my marriage worth saving? Should I save my marriage or move on? The answer to these questions is, “Yes, your marriage can be saved.” 

    Your marriage can be saved, and it’s not impossible. 

    There have been cases of marriages that have experienced far worse than what you are experiencing, and yet, now, they are thriving. 

    So, if this is the case, we all want to understand, “How do you know if your marriage is worth saving?”

    15 signs your marriage is worth saving

    Upset Divorcee Lady Sad Sitting And Holding Her Wedding Ring Looking On It

    How to know if your marriage is worth saving? Before you focus on “How to save my marriage?” and the things that don’t work on your marriage, start with the thoughts and signs your marriage is worth saving, but what are these signs? 

    1. You’re having second thoughts

    Okay, so you have decided that you want to divorce your spouse. However, why are you having thoughts in your head like, “Is my marriage worth saving?” 

    You’re bothered, can’t even sleep, and you are wondering if it’s the right thing to do. This must be one of the significant signs of saving a relationship

    Because if you are done, you will never have second thoughts – not even a single one.

    2. It all started when you had kids

    Heads up. 

    We’re not blaming the kids, but if your constant misunderstandings started when you had your little kids, you should understand. 

    When you become a parent, it’s normal to be tired all the time. It’s normal to be stressed and even normal to lose touch of intimacy with your spouse.

    It’s not like you want to be tired and stressed out, but children require dedication and adjustments. This doesn’t mean that your relationship is gone or won’t work. 

    It means you just need to support each other in parenting and not focus on what is lacking.

    Also watch: 

    3. You still value the sanctity of marriage

    You haven’t tried flirting with another person, and you certainly still respect your spouse and your marriage. 

    Despite all the misunderstandings and being irritated with your spouse, you also feel that you are being respected by your spouse as well, then, maybe it’s time to think. 

    It’s possibly just stress, pressure, and trials that make you feel that you want to be out of the marriage?

    4. You still want to work on your marriage

    Is the relationship worth saving?

    Before concluding that divorce is the answer to your question, “Is my marriage worth saving?” Have you tried talking to each other? 

    Have you tried talking about how you can save your marriage? If both of you are willing to work for it, then that’s it. 

    Don’t file for a divorce because it is one of the most significant signs your marriage is worth saving. Remember, a marriage worth fighting for is a marriage worth working hard for.

    5. You can’t picture your life without your spouse

    Think about Christmas, think about your birthday, oh, and even Thanksgiving. 

    Can you honestly picture yourself without your spouse? If you can’t, then it’s time to give your marriage another try. 

    In marriage, couples grow dependent on each other with the time that is not wrong as marriage is a union, and two lives are bound to get tied up. Counting on your partner is a good thing, and that is also the beauty of marriage.

    6. Your problems aren’t really about your relationship

    Ask yourself this, what are the things that led you to think, “Is my marriage worth saving?” and conclude that it is the best idea to file for divorce? Did you or your spouse cheat? Was there ever violence or abuse

    If your problem consists of being irritated with each other, stress, finances, not meeting your goals, something like that, then these can all be worked out. 

    These are just trials, and many couples, or should we say, most couples are already experiencing these problems.

    7. You still love the person

    Should I try to save my marriage?

    Love matters, and it’s one of the most vital signs your marriage is worth fighting for. 

    You have to understand that your marriage will not save itself, and considering divorce is unfair to both of you and especially to your children. So, what is the next step?

    8. The respect and compassion in marriage is still alive

    If you often ask, “Is my marriage worth saving?” one of the most important signs that you should work on it is when you feel your partner respects you, and you respect your partner as well.  Even if you both have discussed a separation, it is essential to see through the signs whether or not you both want it in your heart.

    Marriages usually tend to break apart when the partners lose respect for each other, no matter the reason for divorce or separation. So, look for the sign if you both are still deciding about it.

    The video below discusses how to get respect in a relationship. Further, how do you get respect in a relationship after your partner has disrespected you?

    9. You both don’t mind spending time with each other

    If you both still spend time with each other or communicate often, or even if it’s a case where you both don’t mind spending time together, then the answer to your question, “Is my marriage worth saving?” is Yes. 

    Couples who enjoy spending time together have a strong relationship. On the other hand, if you both are contemplating separation but still happen to spend time together and don’t mind it, it means that somewhere in your heart and your partner’s, the spark is still alive.

    10. You have felt the spark with your partner

    No matter you both have grown apart now, making you question, “Is my marriage worth saving?” but if you both have felt the spark at one point in your relationship, this is a great and clear sign that you can again reignite the heat in the relationship with some effort.

    Related Reading: Ways to Save My Marriage Myself

    11. You can’t share that level of comfort with anyone else

    One of the signs your marriage is worth saving is when no matter how many fights you have, you can’t think of your life without your partner, and you feel you can never be that genuine with anyone else. 

    You feel a sense of incompleteness. When the relationship is about to end, the mind automatically prepares itself to let go of the person.

    However, when your conscience knows that there’s still hope for the relationship to recover, you will feel the need to keep your partner close

    Related Reading: 30 Signs You’re Getting Too Comfortable In A Relationship

    12. The problems are not directly related to the relationship

    Another important sign your marriage is worth saving is when there are issues between the partners, but these issues are not directly related to the relationship or the habits and behaviors of either or both the partners.

    When there’s havoc because of some external factor, it is understandable that the issue in question is not either party’s fault.

    13. There’s an open line of communication

    Young Attractive Divorcee Lady Holding Her Wedding Ring And Sitting Alone Hold Hands On Head

    Communication is one of the most important pillars of the relationship. If both the partners understand the importance of effective communication and ensure it doesn’t get affected, despite the issues, this is one of the signs your marriage is worth saving.

    Partners who communicate well have fewer chances of misunderstandings.

    14. There’s a 100% commitment

    Infidelity is one of the common reasons for divorce. But if the spouses are fully committed to each other, the issues are bound to get solved because none of them are seeking options to leave the relationship.

    Related Reading: Significance of Commitment in Relationships

    15. You feel respected

    Respect is another important element in the relationship. When spouses feel heard and respected, it gives them a valid reason to make efforts and save the relationship. 

    If you still feel respected in marriage, and there’s an equal level of respect, it is one of the signs your marriage is worth saving.

    When do I start saving my marriage?

    Talk Less Couple Sitting Together On The Bench In The Park

    Now that you feel the need and the urge to work on your marriage, then one of the questions you want to ask is how to save a failing marriage, right? When is a relationship worth saving? 

    There are many options. If you don’t want to save it, there are plenty of excuses. 

    If you wonder, is your marriage worth saving, start by recognizing not only your partner’s faults but also your own. 

    From there, you will see that each of you has faults and what matters is the willingness to work together for a better marriage. You need to want to be better not just for your spouse but also for yourself as well.

    Knowing the signs your marriage is worth saving is important. 

    Without it, one can immediately be consumed with hate and the wrong idea that divorce is always the answer – it’s not.

    Also, you must focus on the positive aspects of your marriage. 

    Now, for yourself, your spouse, and your family – do your best. 

    Takeaway

    Work together, and you can be assured that it can help your marriage. It’s never too late to realize that you made a mistake and that life is better if you have someone with you. Together with the signs that your marriage is worth saving is the hope that everything will be better and happier. 

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  • How To Turn A High-Five Into A Kiss

    How To Turn A High-Five Into A Kiss

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    How To Turn A High-Five Into A Kiss

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    Tripp Advice

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  • If You Want More From Someone Who’s Not Ready DO NOT CHASE Do THIS Instead | Get The Guy

    If You Want More From Someone Who’s Not Ready DO NOT CHASE Do THIS Instead | Get The Guy

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    Have you ever dated someone who’s so hard to stay away from EVEN THOUGH they’re not interested in a relationship and you know you should keep your distance? When you’re in this vulnerable position, the hope that they may change and that things could be different is what drags you back in.

    So how can you break this cycle once and for all? Don’t miss today’s brand-new video

    

    Join the Challenge & Improve Your Confidence With Me.
    Reserve Your Spot for FREE by Signing Up Below . . .
    TAP HERE

    Matthew:

    Before we get into the video, I wanted to let you know the 30-Day Confidence Challenge is happening in just a couple of days. So this is your last chance to sign up. Go over to MHChallenge.com to sign up for free. Literally put it in your browser right now while I’m talking. Type in MHChallenge.com and sign up for free now, and I will see you this coming Thursday on the 13th for our live coaching kickoff call. Now onto the video.

    “Matt, the person I’ve fallen for says they’re not ready, but they keep wanting to stay in touch and won’t let me go. I’m naturally anxiously attached and I’m suffering every day having him in my life, but knowing he doesn’t want a relationship with me. I’ve tried doing no contact and staying away, but it never lasts. I end up reaching out to him or replying to his messages to me, and everything gets rekindled. Help.”

    So let’s start with some important fundamentals about this. You’re in a situation where the other person’s vision is different from yours. In this case, his vision is, “I don’t want a relationship right now. I’m not ready.” And yours is that you absolutely do want a relationship. Now, that immediately puts you on someone else’s timeline, not on your own. So we have to start by seeing that for what it is. It’s a departure from what you want for yourself by keeping this person in your life or by allowing them to keep you in theirs.

    Now, the fact that this person doesn’t want a relationship or doesn’t feel ready doesn’t make them a bad person. In fact, it would probably be easier if this was a bad person. It would make things more clear-cut, but when someone isn’t a bad person, they just want something different from you, it’s very tempting to keep them in your life. When they say, “I don’t want to give you up,” because that’s what happens a lot of the time, right? When someone says they’re not ready, they say, “But I don’t want to lose you. Can we stay in touch? Can we still talk? Can we still be friends?” And all of that just keeps this person in our life. And if you are anxiously attached, then that anxious attachment is going to be on fire during that time because you are close to someone who you’re just suffering all the time because they’re there, but you don’t quite have them. And that part of you that wants to feel secure cannot feel secure in that environment.

    See, I believe that whether you are avoidant attachment style or whether you are anxious, you can actually come more to the middle. You may never be the other side of the pendulum, but you can actually come more to the center to that secure attachment style, with the right person. If you are in a safe environment, psychologically, emotionally, if you feel like you’re in an environment where you can heal, then you can be anxiously attached and start to actually feel more secure, and then your best self is going to come out.

    I define the right person as the person who by being with them, you actually get the safety whereby you can start to heal some of those things in yourself. The wrong people are the people that take us in the worst possible way to the extreme of our attachment style. Those are the people that I don’t necessarily think they’re bad people, but those are people who are wrong for us because by being with them, they’re going to bring out our worst tendencies at the extreme level.

    Now, if you’re anxiously attached, a situation where someone is telling you they’re not ready for a relationship is going to send you to the extreme. So now you are going to be in a situation where you feel like you can’t breathe, where you can’t sleep at night, where your day times are just complete distraction as your attention is monopolized by thoughts and feelings about this person. You’ll struggle to even do some of the most basic things in your day because you’re thinking about them all the time and you’re trying to solve an equation that can’t be solved, which is, “How can I feel safe in an environment that is inherently unsafe?”

    That’s the sad part about it is you may be anxiously attached, but you are in an environment where your anxiety isn’t even your fault because this person is telling you, “I’m not ready for a relationship.” They are telling you that, “I’m going to continue to hurt you.” So trying to achieve security and beating yourself up when you don’t feel it, “I wish I felt more confident. I wish I didn’t feel so anxious all the time.” That’s masochism because this person isn’t giving you a reason to feel safe.

    Now, I’m not taking away responsibility for the work that we have to do ourselves to make ourselves feel more secure, but what we have to do is accept that there are certain environments in which that is an extraordinarily difficult mission to put ourselves through unnecessarily difficult. So your number one priority right now should be, “I need to create an environment of safety for myself where I can learn to heal, to feel more secure, to breathe again.” Now, you can achieve that safety with someone or without someone, but if it’s going to be with someone, they have to meet your basic needs for safety.

    In this example of the woman who asked this question, this man is not meeting her basic needs for safety. So the conversation has to be the next time this person reaches out, “Hey, I can’t be in contact with you for as long as you are confused. If one day, day you’re not confused and I’m still around, let’s talk. But as long as you are confused about what you want with me, because I know what I want, but as long as you are confused about what you want, we can’t be in touch. I can’t have you in my life.” When you say that it’s the beginning of giving yourself that safety.

    Now, when you do leave or when you cut that person off in that way and actually have no contact, you’re going to grieve. There’s going to be a period of pain, but you’ll have grief and a growing sense of safety, not just on its own. You will get a sense of relief. You can have grief and relief at the same time when you remove yourself from someone and you stop hoping, but safety isn’t automatic. Safety is something that has to be worked on. We have to work on feeling safe in our bodies. We have to work on being around people that we feel are the kinds of people that give us that sense of security, friends, family, and people we trust. We have to learn to trust ourselves. We have to learn to be okay in our own company. We have to do all the things that are going to make us feel good in our lives and bring us a sense of peace internally.

    Like I said, that can still come with a feeling of grief. I lost this person. I’m sad about that unrealized potential that I thought was there. You can grieve, but grieving and safety is so much better than staying with a person who doesn’t really want what you want and having hope and anxiety. The hope is false. The grieving is temporary. When you leave, you will feel some grief, but you’ll also have a growing sense of safety. If you stay, you’ll be staying on hope and you’ll be filled with anxiety, and here’s what I want you to tell yourself. Grief and safety is much, much better than hope and anxiety. Why? Because the hope is false and you will stay in anxiety, but the grief is temporary and you will achieve safety if you do the right things. And not only that, you’ll open up the door to the person that you can experience that safety with in the context of a relationship. It will never happen with someone who tells you they’re not ready, they don’t want a relationship, they’re not sure about you.

    Now, the moments where we usually decide enough is enough is when someone has hurt us today, when we’ve realized based on some conversation we’ve had today that they are not changing. We’ve had it for the 100th time, we’ve stood in front of them. We’ve just maybe had an amazing three months with them. We thought everything was changing, and then they turned around and once again told us they’re not ready for something more. And when we experience that, it’s almost like this little thing goes off in our mind that says, “Oh my God, nothing has shifted.” And we access a bit of truth in that moment because despite the beautiful times we’ve just had with them and the fact that we thought we were getting closer and we thought we were making progress and we thought it was finally heading in the direction we want, we suddenly realize that progress hasn’t been made, that fundamentally this person is still where they were the last time they hurt us.

    And so when we feel that, the pain of staying there suddenly gets greater than the fear of leaving, and when the scales tip in that direction, we leave, there’s a resoluteness to that. “No more, I cannot do this. I have hit this brick wall for the last time.” Now, here’s what happens, and this is why this particular woman is struggling so much with breaking off from this person, why she keeps going back to him, rekindling things any opportunity she gets, after a couple of weeks or a month is because with distance from the person, from the situation, the scales start to tip in the other direction.

    Gradually missing this person, their love, their companionship, their personality, the connection and chemistry we feel with them, that starts to increase. And what decreases is our connection to that truth, the truth of the brick wall, that nothing has actually changed. With distance from the wall, we start to get hope again. We no longer see it as a brick wall. We see it as a possibility. “Maybe, just maybe, maybe this time will be different.” And when the scales tip back in favor of hope, now when we get a message from that person, we’re liable to respond. How do we deal with this?

    Here’s a key strategy you can take away with you today. In life, sometimes we connect to a truth, a moment where we connect to what’s real, not hope, not just emotion. We connect to something that’s real. And in that moment where you hit the brick wall and you connect to the fact that this situation is not progressing, that regardless of your connection and your chemistry with this person or even your history with this person, this person does not represent a viable option for your love life, for your time. When you hit that brick wall, that’s like a moment of truth and that moment of truth makes you say, “Enough.”

    What we need to do is capture that moment. In that moment where you feel that visceral truth, write it down. Write down what you feel in that moment. Write down your reasons for leaving. Write down what you know to be true. This person has done this yet again, this is where they are in life. This is who they are. This is their level of development and nothing has changed and nothing is about to change. “This is why I’m leaving.” Now when you connect to that and you write it down, it’s like you’re giving yourself the ability to go back to that emotion when you need it, so that when you feel disconnected from that and when you get some distance, you have a way of going back there.

    And that’s what’s necessary because just because time has elapsed and just because the emotion of missing someone is heightened, it doesn’t mean that brick wall has changed at all. And that’s the distinction we have to start making, losing the amnesia of the pain, of the suffering, of the immovable wall by connecting to the truth anytime we need it. So the next time you find yourself in that place of truth, record it, write it down so that you can come back to it. And remember, in all of this, you have to start making your time the most prized asset you have because relationships, potential partners are replaceable, but life is not. Your life is irreplaceable and it needs to be treated as such.

    I want to take a moment with you before you go anywhere because today’s concept is profoundly important, and you may have had an epiphany right now, a realization about what you need to do, but that doesn’t mean you won’t have weak moments. It doesn’t mean you won’t be tempted to go back in certain moments, to betray yourself because you feel drawn to someone again, even if they’re the wrong person or it’s the wrong behavior. I want to make you strong enough that no matter what, you can stay true to what’s important to you, to your actual vision for your life. Time is your most precious asset, and if in a moment of weakness you go back, you can lose months or years of your life, and that can deprive you from meeting the right person.

    Confidence is a muscle we have to strengthen. My goal with you is to get you to a point where you’re so certain of what you deserve, so certain of what your needs are, so certain of what you want, that that compass is always taking you in the right direction regardless of the temptation. One of the ways I can do that with you is something that I am putting on right now in the next few days, which is the 30-Day Confidence Challenge. My aim is to get you to a place in those 30 days where you are strong enough to make or stick to a decision like this, or whatever it is you want to achieve in your life right now. You have that certainty that makes you drive after what you want, or finally, say no to what you don’t want.

    On April the 13th, this Thursday, we’re going to have a live kickoff call. I’m going to give you five missions to do over 30 days, and then we’re all going to do them together as part of a live community. It’s going to be an incredible experience. Anyone can take part in this. This is completely free. So if you’ve ever wondered, “Matt, is there something I can take part in that won’t cost me anything, or it’s just easy for me to try out as an actual coaching experience outside of YouTube?” This is your moment.

    Come over to MHChallenge.com, sign up for free, and I will see you on the 13th of April. When you do sign up, I’ll send you all of the information for how to access both the live session and the community that we have for this, which is a private community, and we’ll get going together in just a few days. I can’t wait to see you there, MHChallenge.com is the link. Thank you, and I’ll see you soon.

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    Fionnuala Mckenna

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  • 40 Best Father’s Day Gifts 2023

    40 Best Father’s Day Gifts 2023

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    Best Father’s Day Gifts for All the Dads

    Tired of searching the internet for the best Father’s Day gifts? Look no further; the Divas have you covered!

    This list has 40 of the BEST gifts for dad. We’re sure you will find a thing (or two, or three!) that he will love!

    Know anyone else struggling to find the perfect gift for dear ol’ dad, a father-in-law, or grandpa? Send them this link! Sharing is caring!

    Check out this awesome list of 40 of the BEST Father's Day gifts for 2023! | The Dating Divas
    40 best Father’s Day gifts for 2023

    Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. To learn more about ’em, click here.

    Table of Contents
    1. Best Father’s Day Gifts for All the Dads
    2. Father’s Day Gift Ideas for the Outdoors
    3. Father’s Day Gifts for Dads Who Like to Be Prepared
    4. Father’s Day Gift Ideas for Dads Who Like to BBQ
    5. Father’s Day Gift Ideas for On-the-Go or in Their Car
    6. Father’s Day Gift Ideas for the Active Dads
    7. Other Great Gifts for Dad

    Father’s Day Gift Ideas for the Outdoors

    These gifts are great for dads who spend a lot of time outdoors. Whether they like camping, hiking, or simply hanging out in the backyard, we’ve got something for them all!

    1. Waterproof Portable Bluetooth Speaker: This Diva gifted this to her dad last Father’s Day, and it has been an absolute HIT, to say the least! Perfect for using outdoors while barbecuing, camping, going to the beach, or hanging out on the porch.

    Check out this waterproof, portable Bluetooth speaker for Father's Day gift ideas! | The Dating Divas
    Bluetooth speaker for Father’s Day gift ideas

    2. 100 Quart Coleman Wheeled Hard Cooler: This cooler keeps ice cool for up to five days, so it’s perfect for those weekend camping trips!

    This Coleman Wheeled Cooler makes a great Father's Day gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    This cooler would make an awesome Father’s Day gift idea

    3. Oaskys Camping Sleeping Bag: This sleeping bag has over 7,000 five-star reviews, and it’s under $50!

    This sleeping bag makes a great Father's Day gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    Sleeping bags make great gifts for dads

    4. Coleman Camping Chair with Built-in 4-Can Cooler: You can’t go camping without a sturdy camping chair!

    This camping chair is a great Father's Day gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    Camping chair for a Father’s Day gift for dads

    5. Wise Owl Outfitters Camping Hammock: This hammock is perfect for dads who love to relax outdoors!

    This camping hammock is a great gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    Camping hammock for Father’s Day gift ideas

    6. Pacific Mountain Adult Sport Bike: Want to make all their bike dreams come true? This gift idea has rave reviews and handles different types of terrain beautifully.

    Mountain bikes make great gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    A mountain bike is a perfect gift for dads

    7. PHI VILLA Outdoor Pop-Up Canopy: This 10′ x 10′ canopy is perfect for keeping out the sun while camping, a day at the lake, or even a picnic at the beach!

    Check out these Father's Day gift ideas for the outdoorsy dad! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for camping

    8. Lightweight Packable Travel Hiking Backpack: This backpack has an inside wet pocket, perfect for your electronics. It also folds up, so it’s really easy to store!

    This outdoor backpack is a cool Father's Day gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    An outdoor backpack is a pretty nifty gift for dad

    9. Dannto Men’s Mid Ankle Hiking Boots: Perfect for outdoorsy dads! The description says, “Lightweight and Flexible EVA midsoles reduce foot fatigue. They are designed for long-lasting comfort, superior cushioning, and high energy return.”

    We have a great list of Father's Day gift ideas for outdoorsy dads! | The Dating Divas
    Outdoor Father’s Day gift ideas

    10. Lightweight Aluminum Alloy All Terrain Snowshoes: These snowshoes have over 2,000 great reviews! They are lightweight and the perfect snowshoe for beginner or intermediate snowshoeing fans!

    These snow shoes should be on your list of Father's Day gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    Snow shoes for your Father’s Day gifts for dad

    Father’s Day Gifts for Dads Who Like to Be Prepared

    It’s impossible to be *too* prepared, right? With that in mind, we’re sure the dad who loves being prepared will appreciate these ideas!

    11. First Aid Kit for the Car: It’s always good to be prepared, especially when it comes to first aid!

    Every dad needs an emergency first aid kit! These make great gifts for dad. | The Dating Divas
    Practical Father’s Day gifts for dads

    12. Portable Air Compressor: This air compressor is super handy, portable, and really powerful!

    This portable air compressor is great for gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    Portable air compressor for Father’s Day gift ideas

    13. Leatherman Multitool: For the dad who always finds himself needing some sort of tool.

    This multitool would make the perfect Father's Day gift for dads who never seem to have enough tools on hand! | The Dating Divas
    This Father’s Day gift idea would please any dad

    Father’s Day Gift Ideas for Dads Who Like to BBQ

    Step up the BBQ game for the dad in your life with these awesome gift ideas! (Any of these would pair perfectly with this darling Father’s Day “Grill” Game and gift.)

    14. Cuisinart Wooden Handle BBQ Tool Set: Every pro-BBQer needs a nice set of tools to get the job done!

    Check out these Father's Day gift ideas for the barbecue! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for the barbecue

    15. Wood Pellet Smoker: This smoker is a hit with this Diva’s hubby! Perfect for chicken, steak, and even pizza!

    Check out these Father's Day ideas for the BBQer! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for the BBQer

    16. Char-Broil Performance Grill: This grill is small(er) but mighty! Perfect for family gatherings during the summer.

    Check out these Father's Day gift ideas that are perfect for summertime! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for summertime

    17. Butcher Box Gift or Subscription: Every BBQer needs meat, right?

    A Butcher Box subscription is a great Father's Day gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    A Butcher Box gift subscription makes a unique gift for dads

    18. Fire Pit: We know this isn’t necessarily for BBQing, but you can roast hot dogs! That counts, too, right? {Wink!}

    This fire pit is a great Father's Day gift idea for dads! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for the backyard

    Father’s Day Gift Ideas for On-the-Go or in Their Car

    Did you know Americans spend around 18 days in their car per year? Crazy! Make dad’s commute more enjoyable with these cool gadgets and gift ideas for his car.

    19. Car Wash Subscription: A subscription to a car wash would be the perfect Father’s Day gift for dads who love a clean car! If you don’t have a Quick Quack Car Wash near you, that’s okay! Be sure to check out the several other national or local companies that offer subscriptions.

    A car wash subscription is on our list of great gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    A car wash subscription for Father’s Day gift ideas

    20. 26-Piece DIY Car Detailing Kit: If a car wash isn’t how the dad in your life likes to get his car cleaned, don’t fret! We’ve got DIY Father’s Day gifts, too, including this DIY car detailing kit!

    We've got DIY Father's Day gifts for the car, too! | The Dating Divas
    DIY Father’s Day gifts for dad’s car

    21. Floor Mats for Cars: These floor mats can be used for most cars and, as a bonus, are weather-proof!

    Car floor mats make a great Father's Day gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift for dads for their cars

    22. Steering Wheel Cover: Steering wheel covers help provide extra grip, and they upgrade the interior look of the car!

    Check out these Father's Day gift ideas for the car lover! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for the car lover

    23. Sunglasses: Everyone needs a nice pair of sunglasses to keep in the car!

    Check out our Father's Day gift ideas for his car! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for his car

    24. Hydrapeak Roadster 40 oz Tumbler: This tumbler will fit in his cup holder and keeps his drinks hot for up to 10 hours or cold for up to 34 hours!

    Check out these Father's Day gift ideas for traveling in the car! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for traveling in the car

    25. Best Dad Ever License Plate Frame: Let the dad in your life know that you think he is the best dad ever by getting him this license plate frame!

    We have lots of Father's Day gifts you can choose for his car! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gifts for his car

    Father’s Day Gift Ideas for the Active Dads

    These Father’s Day gift ideas are great for dads who spend a good amount of time being active.

    26. Swimming Suit: This swimsuit is quick-drying, so it’s perfect for those long summer days spent near water! It also comes in several different colors and patterns to fit any dad’s style!

    This swim suit is on our list of Father's Day gift ideas for the active dads! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for active dads

    27. Men’s Workout Shorts & Shirts Set: This workout clothing set will make prepping for the gym so much easier for your dad!

    We have a great list of Father's Day gift ideas for working out! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for working out

    28. GoSports Slammo Game Set: This is a great gift for dads who want to be active with their kids or spouse (or both)!

    We have a great list of Father's Day gift ideas for being active with your kids or spouse! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for being active

    29. Pull-Up Bar: This pull-up bar is multifunctional and can be used in every room of the house!

    You'll love these Father's Day gift ideas for the athletic dads! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for the athletic dad

    30. Ultimate Gym Bag: This bag really is the ultimate gym bag! It has 10 pockets, a full-length shoe pocket, two bottle holders, and more!

    The gym-goer in your life will love this gym bag! Great for a Father's Day gift for dads! | The Dating Divas
    Gym bag Father’s Day gift for dads

    31. Deep Tissue Massager: This massage gun is great for post-workout recovery. It’s also portable, so it’s easy to take to the gym!

    Check out our list of athletic gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    Athletic gifts for dad

    32. Waterproof Bluetooth Earbuds: These earbuds are perfect for athletic dads because they are resistant to sweat, water, and rain!

    Check out these awesome Father's Day gifts for athletic dads! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gifts for athletic dads

    33. Icy Hot: This is the perfect companion for athletic dads. It’s mess-free, so they can use it on the go and store it in their gym bag, hiking backpack, car, or wherever!

    You'll love the Father's Day gift ideas we chose for the sporty dads! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for sporty dads

    Other Great Gifts for Dad

    34. Kindle: This makes a great gift for dads who travel. It’s lightweight, compact, and can store thousands of books!

    We have some great Father's Day gift ideas for the dads who travel! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift ideas for dads who travel

    35. Vinyl Record Player Turntable: This would be an incredible option for dads who love music!

    This vinyl record turntable is a great Father's Day gift for dads who love music! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gift for dads who love music

    36. JerkyGent Subscription: For dads who “have it all,” how about a monthly jerky subscription that provides yummy, premium jerky from across the country?

    Check out these Father's Day gifts for dads who have it all! | The Dating Divas
    Father’s Day gifts for dads who have it all

    37. Harry’s Subscription: Every dad deserves a great shave! And this company comes highly recommended!

    Subscriptions make great gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    Subscription gifts for dad

    38. Carhartt Fleece-Lined Jeans: These jeans are great for dads who spend a lot of time outdoors and want to stay warm without a ton of layers!

    Fleece-lined jeans make great gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    Gifts for dad while he’s outdoors

    39. Luxury Shaving Kit: This kit is great for dads who want the luxury barber shop shave without the cost! Doesn’t it just look fancy?

    You will love these shaving gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    Shaving gifts for dad

    40. Personal Message Tie: You can customize the message on this tie as well as the tie design! If you want to be even more personal, how about making DIY Father’s Day gifts in the form of handmade ties?

    Check out these fun personalized gifts for dad! | The Dating Divas
    Personalized gifts for dad

    We hope this list has been helpful in your search for the perfect Father’s Day gifts! Regardless of what you gift, we are sure they will feel the love!

    Happy Father’s Day!

    Don’t forget to check out a few other helpful (and FREE!) Father’s Day ideas:

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    Macey

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  • 21 Subtle Signs A Shy Girl Has A Crush On You

    21 Subtle Signs A Shy Girl Has A Crush On You

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    While some women are confident and open about their feelings, that’s not the case with the ones who are reserved. Such women will slyly give you hints and you need to be highly vigilant to catch the signs a shy girl has a crush on you.

    As per research, shy women fear rejection, which is why they keep their feelings to themselves even if it hurts them. Instead, they’ll drop subtle hints and, at times, not-so-subtle hints. They do this to let you know that they’re interested in you without actually saying it. They want you to approach them so that they won’t have to deal with the fear of rejection if they ask you out first.

    So will a shy girl ignore her crush altogether? Well, she might, but not exactly. In this guide, we’ll tell you how to know if a shy girl likes you without talking to her. We will also give you tips on how to talk to a shy girl and make her comfortable.

    21 Subtle Signs A Shy Girl Has A Crush On You

    If you’re confused about whether a shy girl has a crush on you or not, the following points should be enough to guide you to a proper conclusion on most occasions. Do note that every person is unique and she might not tick all the boxes even if she adores you. Treat this list as a guide.

    For more expert-backed insights, please subscribe to our YouTube Channel. Click here

    1. She’s super talkative on text but super quiet in person

    Will a shy girl ignore her crush? Well, a reserved woman isn’t confident when you meet her in person. However, that’s not the case when you meet her online. When a shy girl has a crush on you, she’ll talk animatedly on texts. Therefore, know that she is not ignoring you in person, she is just not confident enough to show her real personality to you face to face.

    She wants you to approach her but just isn’t brave enough to say it to you directly. While the reason is known, it’s still amazing to see how she transforms into a super quiet person after being super talkative online. One of the few signs a shy girl likes you but is trying to hide it is that she’ll ignore everyone but you in person.

    2. She helps you out even if it’s inconvenient for her

    If a shy girl has a crush on you, she’ll go out of her way to help you out. This is one of the biggest examples of how she drops subtle hints that she is into you. An example of this could be how she volunteers to help you with your project work, even if her own deadlines are fast approaching. In case a shy girl has a crush on you at work, you’ll notice that she helps you out in your presentation even if she has plenty to do herself.

    3. She finds you funny even if most people don’t

    One of the most obvious signs a shy girl has a crush on you is that she’ll find you mostly hilarious.

    • If a shy girl laughs insanely even at your most borderline funny jokes, chances are, she has a crush on you
    • How to know if a shy girl likes you without talking to her about it? If you are someone who isn’t appreciated for their sense of humor regularly, the fact that she finds you funny when most people don’t is the answer to that

    Related Reading: How To Make A Girl Laugh – 11 Failproof Secrets That Work Like A Charm

    4. Her friends giggle when she’s around you

    How does a shy girl react when she’s around you? Try to notice that. But more important is how her friends react. Do you notice that her friends giggle when she’s around you, or she’s walking past you, or tease her when you enter the room? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, then this is among the most obvious signs a shy girl has a crush on you.

    5. She’s interested in knowing about your life

    In general, when you’re interested in someone, what’s the first thing you do? Try to find out more about them! Your shy girl would do the same if she likes you.

    • If you notice that she suddenly asks you more questions to try to get to know you better, she might like you
    • A shy girl can ask you these questions directly or she prefers to learn about you through your mutual friends, in a non-creepy way
    • When someone wants to know everything about a person, it usually means that they care about the latter
    • So, if a girl is interested in knowing everything about your life, your likes and dislikes, your goals, even your family members, it could mean that she’s into you

    6. A shy girl remembers even the most unimportant details about you

    Does she often mention various, often inconsequential, events from your past that meant a lot to you? This may be a sign that she is interested in you. People tend to pay more attention to someone’s details or stories when they are romantically interested in them.

    Reserved women in particular tend to make a mental note of these instances. If she remembers details such as your opinion on a random movie to that friend whom you miss but only mentioned in passing, chances are, she’s into you.

    7. She becomes friends with your group to know more about you

    Since a shy girl doesn’t feel confident enough to talk to you directly, she’ll try to become friends with your group. This way, she gets to learn more about you without asking you directly.

    Rachel, a student from Philadelphia, shares, “I would get very shy around my crush and wouldn’t be able to put two sentences together. Even though I wanted to know everything about him, I was unable to ask him questions. So I became friends with his friends instead. I’d blush while talking about him, but I did finally understand him and get the courage to talk to him”.

    Related Reading: 26 Love Yourself Quotes to Build Your Confidence

    8. Her friends try to become your friends to find out more about you

    Similarly, her friends might try to become friends with you. They do this to not only find out more details about you, but also to gauge if you’re right for her. They’re perfectly aware of who she is, what’s good for her and what’s not, which is why they do their best to ensure you’re suitable for her.

    9. She blushes a lot when you compliment her

    Any person, regardless of gender, can experience uncontrollable blushing when talking to their crush. This means that a shy individual can easily blush due to embarrassment or discomfort. A great way to find out if a shy girl likes you is to compliment her or even subtly flirt with her. If your crush turns red when you smile, it could mean that she reciprocates your feelings.

    However, there is a fine line between flirting with someone subtly and coming on too strong. You should always pay attention to the verbal and non-verbal cues when you do this with a person who’s reserved. If there is even the slightest hint of discomfort, stop flirting immediately. Remember to ask yourself, healthy flirting isn’t damaging but are you crossing the line? You also need to be present and observant to understand whether she blushes while receiving compliments from anyone or acts differently around you.

    Related Reading: Want To Make Someone Blush? Here Are 12 Adorable Ways!

    10. She’s nervous or awkward around you while she is otherwise calm and composed

    If a shy girl is awkward, tongue-tied, or nervous around you while being generally calm, there’s a chance that she’s into you. Quora user, Savannah Jaye, writes, “On the off chance that I do somehow end up in a conversation with my crush (i.e. I am talking with a mutual friend, and he joins in), I tend to completely lose my cool”. Her being awkward or nervous around you can also be considered among the signs a shy girl likes you but is trying not to show it.

    11. You find her looking at you multiple times in a day

    Quora User, Lanie, shares her perspective on the topic, “If a shy girl has a crush on you, she will NEVER EVER look directly at you, even when you enter the room.” You’ll find that she steals glances at you multiple times a day. This is obvious as she isn’t able to maintain eye contact with most people, let alone the person she likes. However, you can only arrive at this conclusion if she steals glances at you and nobody else.

    12. A shy girl would lean toward you if she likes you

    It’s said that girls lean toward those they are comfortable with. John-Paul Wilson, a Quora writer, says, “It’s a sign that she’s physically comfortable with you, but not necessarily a strong indicator of romantic interest. Like most things, it depends a lot on context. If she’s leaning on you for support while tying her shoe, that’s not very significant at all. If you’re sitting side by side and she leans her head on your shoulder that probably indicates some affection, though it need not be romantic”.

    So you need to be able to differentiate the body language signs of attraction during different situations. If she is interested in you, you’ll also find her giving you just a small brush of touch while walking past you quite frequently.

    13. She shows her love indirectly through her social media posts

    If you want to know something about a person in today’s world, you need only check their social media. According to a study, social media use has skyrocketed over the past decade and a half by almost 70%. And another research reported that “social media provided better chances to self-disclosure: it was easier to tell some things about yourself or you just happened to reveal information via social media to your partner that you would not necessarily say otherwise.”

    No wonder a shy girl will let you know that she’s interested through her social media posts and activities. An example of this could be sending you posts about romantic songs and movies. This should also be considered among the most obvious signs a shy girl has a crush on you. While this is something that most friends do as well, it can be a sign that a shy girl likes you.

    • This is especially true if she keeps sending you pictures and images that remind her of you
    • Additionally, if she’s interested in you, she’s more likely to like and/or comment on all of your pictures, even if they don’t naturally appear on her timeline
    • If she is interested in you, she may drop subtle hints about you in her social media posts. It can be the lyrics of your favorite song or she might tag you in a quote

    Related Reading: 21 Flirting Signs From A Woman You Never Knew About

    14. She does her best to look great when she’s with you

    As they say, presentation is everything! You can see it whenever someone tries to woo their love. The same can be said about shy girls. If she suddenly changes her appearance when she’s around you, it could be a sign that she likes you. You will notice changes in the way she dresses and styles her hair. Being nervous, she doesn’t talk much, but she tries to make you notice her. So she keeps changing her appearance to attract your attention.

    If she acts differently around you by going the extra mile whenever she’s with you, this could be a sign that she has a crush on you.

    15. She takes an interest in your hobbies even if they don’t naturally interest her

    If she’s taking an interest in your hobbies which don’t interest her naturally, it could indicate she’s into you. Examples of this could be:

    • She’s a fan of thrillers and scary movies, but she starts taking an interest in romantic movies, knowing you’re a fan of those
    • She starts to play or learn about the sport you love
    • She might start to read the kinds of books you read

    16. She finds ways to keep the conversation going

    While a shy girl won’t usually initiate a conversation, she’ll do her best to keep the conversation going if she’s into you. She’s perfectly aware of her skills when it comes to initiating a chat, so she makes it up by stretching it as much as possible. Don’t assume she’s playing hard to get because she’s just a shy girl waiting for you to make the first move.

    • She may be reticent about sharing her personal stories, but she’s always ready to listen to yours
    • You will be surprised to hear yourself pouring your heart out while she patiently listens
    • She likes to hear things you thought someone would never be interested in. That’s because she wants to get to know you better

    Related Reading: 25 Ways To Keep A Conversation Going With A Girl

    17. Her voice gets slightly louder when she’s with you

    It’s said that a girl’s voice increases when she’s with those she likes. If the same happens when she’s with you, this could also be a sign. Abby Rose, Quora user, shares, “If a girl’s voice is not naturally high in pitch, and you notice this change around you, the chances she likes you are great. This is common in girls who are attracted to a boy or father figure. Higher pitched voices are seen as attractive or youthful by certain males and just happens naturally in females when they are around a guy they like or favor.”

    Furthermore, this research shows that we change the tone of our voice while talking to someone we’re into, in hopes of making a romantic connection.

    18. She waits for you to complete your work

    If a shy girl has a crush on you at work, she’ll wait for you to complete your work so that you can both leave the office together. She realizes that she doesn’t have the confidence to talk to you in front of everyone, so it’s best to wait for a time when there are few people around, and spend time with you.

    19. She copies your mannerisms unknowingly

    When we like someone, we copy some aspect of their mannerisms unknowingly and the same applies here. Nick Hobson, a behavioral and brain scientist, says in this Forbes article, “If a person likes you, they will spontaneously mimic your physical postures and gestures. This ‘affiliative mimicry’ is an ancient evolved process rooted in the brain’s Mirror Neuron System which is the social glue that binds people together”.

    Sean Kernan, a Quora user, shares his opinion, “If a girl has a crush on you, even the shyest girl, there are always signs. The signs are often subconscious behaviors.”

    20. She compliments you regularly

    A shy girl who has a crush on you will compliment you regularly in hopes of winning you over. If a girl likes you, she notices everything about you and compliments you.

    • It could be the way you talk or the way you play sports
    • Women know that compliments can get one very far and this is her subtle way of flirting with you
    • While complimenting, she’ll often give you just a small brush of touch. Physical touch is a great indicator of a shy girl’s interest in you. She’ll communicate more through her actions rather than words

    21. You often find her at your favorite spots

    Someone who has a crush on you will do their best to find out your likes and dislikes. This includes your favorite spots to hang out. If she’s shy, but not introverted, she will start hanging out at your favorite spots in hopes of catching you there and spending time with you.

    Related Reading: How Do Introverts Flirt? 10 Ways They Try To Get Your Attention

    How To Talk To A Shy Girl And Make Her Comfortable

    Now that you are aware of the signs a shy girl has a crush on you, it’s time to address how to talk to her and get her to open up. Talking to a shy girl is a tricky thing because, on one hand, you want to know what she thinks of you. On the other hand, you don’t want to overwhelm her and be a part of an unpleasant memory that will live in her head for a long time. Therefore, be careful and gentle in your approach. Follow the steps mentioned below to know how to talk to a shy girl and make her comfortable:

    • Approach her when she is relatively alone, is not in a group, and is in a public place
    • You can ask a mutual friend to arrange an appropriate time and place for a meeting. Alternatively, you can approach her via social media
    • Since she’s shy, you’re going to have to ask interesting questions to make the conversation flow. Start with questions like how her day was and how she’s doing first, then move on to her area of interests
    • Give her time to answer and don’t make any assumptions about her
    • If the meeting goes well, ask her if you can meet again

    John-Paul Wilson, the Quora writer mentioned above, wrote further, “It’s generally impossible to be sure someone likes you from hints and signals alone. Some people are totally blind to such signals, while others are apt to over-interpret every little gesture as a sign of interest. It doesn’t really matter though. Whether she was signaling that she likes you or not, if you ever want to go out with her, you’re still going to have to put your cards on the table and ask her out. Until she actually asks you out herself, that’s the only way it’s going to happen.”

    Key Pointers

    • A shy girl will go out of her way to help you, even if it’s not convenient for her
    • Other signs include being super talkative on texts and super quiet in person
    • Also among the signs a shy girl has a crush on you, she is awkward, tongue-tied, and clumsy around you while she is calm and composed otherwise
    • Be gentle and cautious while approaching a shy girl, as you don’t want to overwhelm her

    That was our take on the signs a shy girl has a crush on you. Here’s hoping we were of some help on the matter, and you will now be able to detect her feelings. While we wish you the best of luck for your future, on the odd chance that she is not into you, let her know that this won’t affect your friendship and move on.

    FAQs

    1. How do you win a shy girl’s heart?

    The road to a shy girl’s heart is through small things that let her know you care, and that you pay attention to her. Spend a lot of time getting to know her and letting her get to know you. Make her feel comfortable. Building trust is the key to a relationship with a shy girl.

    2. Will a shy girl ignore her crush?

    Well, a shy and reserved woman isn’t usually very confident when she has to interact with someone in person. So, even if she likes you, she won’t be able to talk to you much, or make a lot of eye contact. This might feel like she is ignoring you and doesn’t like you, but you need to look out for the signs listed above to see if she’s just shy or if she actually isn’t that into you.

    How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date – 18 Tips To Make Her Say Yes

    13 Signs A Girl Likes You But Is Playing Hard To Get

    12 Definite Signs She Wants To Be Your Girlfriend

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  • A Practical Guide With Action Steps

    A Practical Guide With Action Steps

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    Written by dating coach for men Gary Gunn – Founder of Social Attraction

    In this article, I will teach you how to overcome loneliness.

    As an accredited therapist and coach, I will also provide you with some simple steps that you can take right away to start feeling more connected.

    🌠 Continue reading to increase your self-confidence and be sure to sign up for my newsletter for my latest articles.

    Reach out to existing connections

    Strengthening relationships with friends, family members, and acquaintances is a crucial step in combating loneliness.

    Action Steps:

    • Schedule regular catch-ups through phone calls, texts, or video chats.
    • Take the initiative to invite people to social events or gatherings.
    • Share your feelings of loneliness with close friends or family members, allowing them to support you.

    Fostering existing connections will help create a support system, offering companionship and emotional support during times of loneliness.

    Engage in social activities

    Participating in social activities helps you meet new people, expand your social circle, and form meaningful connections.

    Action Steps:

    • Join clubs, organizations, or community groups based on your interests or hobbies.
    • Attend local events or activities, such as classes, workshops, or cultural events.
    • Volunteer for causes you are passionate about, which can also foster connections with like-minded individuals.

    By actively engaging in social activities, you can create opportunities to connect with others, reducing feelings of loneliness and building a sense of belonging.

    Develop your communication skills

    Effective communication is vital for establishing and maintaining strong connections with others.

    Action Steps:

    • Practice active listening by paying full attention to the speaker and responding thoughtfully.
    • Develop empathy by trying to understand the emotions and perspectives of others.
    • Express yourself clearly and openly, allowing others to better understand and connect with you.

    Improving your communication skills will facilitate deeper and more meaningful connections, making it easier to overcome loneliness.

    Cultivate self-compassion and self-care

    Taking care of your own emotional well-being is essential for reducing loneliness and improving your ability to connect with others.

    Action Steps:

    • Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with kindness and understanding.
    • Prioritize self-care activities, such as regular exercise, healthy eating, and adequate sleep.
    • Engage in activities that bring joy and relaxation, such as hobbies, meditation, or spending time in nature.

    By focusing on self-compassion and self-care, you’ll create a strong foundation for emotional well-being, enabling you to form healthier and more satisfying connections with others.

    Practice vulnerability and authenticity

    Being genuine and open about your thoughts and feelings can foster deeper connections and help others feel comfortable around you.

    Action Steps:

    • Share your experiences and emotions with others, allowing them to understand your perspective.
    • Be open to receiving feedback and be willing to learn from others’ perspectives.
    • Show empathy and understanding towards others’ feelings and experiences.

    Practicing vulnerability and authenticity enables you to establish more meaningful relationships, which can help reduce feelings of loneliness and create a stronger sense of connection with others.

    Set achievable goals and celebrate accomplishments

    Setting and achieving personal goals can contribute to a sense of purpose, confidence, and self-worth, making it easier to connect with others.

    Action Steps:

    • Identify specific, realistic, and time-bound personal goals.
    • Break larger goals into smaller, manageable steps.
    • Celebrate your accomplishments and share your successes with friends and family.

    Achieving personal goals can provide a sense of purpose and accomplishment, which in turn can make it easier to connect with others and overcome loneliness.

    Embrace opportunities for personal growth

    Continuously working on personal growth can improve your self-awareness and emotional intelligence, making it easier to connect with others.

    Action Steps:

    • Reflect on your values, strengths, and areas for improvement.
    • Seek feedback from others to gain insights into your behavior and communication.
    • Pursue learning opportunities, such as reading, attending workshops, or seeking mentorship.

    Personal growth helps enhance your emotional intelligence and self-awareness, which can improve your ability to connect with others and alleviate feelings of loneliness.

    Build a healthy digital-social balance

    While technology can help us stay connected, it’s essential to find a balance between online interactions and face-to-face connections.

    Action Steps:

    • Set boundaries for technology use, such as designated times for checking social media or responding to messages.
    • Prioritize in-person interactions whenever possible, even if it’s just a quick catch-up over coffee.
    • Engage in activities that promote face-to-face social connections, like joining a local sports team, book club, or hobby group.

    Maintaining a healthy balance between online and face-to-face interactions can help ensure that your social connections are meaningful and fulfilling, ultimately helping you overcome feelings of loneliness.

    Conclusion

    • Overcoming loneliness involves actively seeking connections, nurturing existing relationships, and taking care of your own emotional well-being.
    • By implementing the action steps you’ll be well on your way to enjoying more fulfilling connections with those around you.
    • Fostering meaningful connections takes time and effort, so keep working towards a more connected and emotionally satisfying life.

    Social Attraction Courses for Self Success

    If you would like to learn more about becoming self-confident, then consider taking one of my Social Attraction courses.

    I can help you become a more desirable man by increasing your status, confidence, and skills in approaching, meeting and dating women.

    🔥 Explore My Life-Changing Courses Now! 🔥

    Resources

    1. Holt-Lunstad, J., Smith, T. B., & Layton, J. B. (2010). Social relationships and mortality risk: A meta-analytic review. PLoS Medicine, 7(7), e1000316. This meta-analytic review examined the influence of social relationships on the risk of mortality. The study found that individuals with stronger social relationships had a 50% increased likelihood of survival compared to those with weak or insufficient social connections. This finding highlights the importance of fostering connections and actively seeking social interactions to improve overall well-being and longevity.
    2. Cacioppo, J. T., & Cacioppo, S. (2014). Social relationships and health: The toxic effects of perceived social isolation. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 8(2), 58-72. This review article by leading researchers in the field of loneliness and social isolation explores the negative health consequences of perceived social isolation, which can include increased risk for depression, anxiety, and cardiovascular disease. The authors emphasize the importance of cultivating social connections, communication skills, and emotional well-being to combat feelings of loneliness and improve overall health.
    3. Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85-101. In this seminal study on self-compassion, Kristin Neff explores the benefits of treating oneself with kindness, understanding, and acceptance. The research shows that practicing self-compassion can help individuals cope with negative emotions, reduce feelings of isolation, and promote emotional well-being. These findings support the importance of self-care and self-compassion in combating loneliness and fostering meaningful connections with others.

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    Gary Gunn

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  • How To Confront A Cheater – 11 Expert Tips

    How To Confront A Cheater – 11 Expert Tips

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    The worst has happened. You have found out your partner has cheated on you. Your mind is out of control and your heart is broken – you’re hardly thinking about how to confront a cheater. Your thoughts are muddled, and your feelings all over the place. To put it in simple words, you can’t think straight.

    To find out how to confront a cheater as you go through the motions of disbelief, grief, and trauma, we reached out to psychologist Jayant Sundaresan, (Masters in Applied Psychology). He said, “For some people, cheating is like an addiction. But that doesn’t mean they can’t mend their ways or tame their addiction. In all probability, they can control it unless and until they are intoxicated and aren’t in the right state of mind.”

    11 Expert Tips For Confronting A Cheater

    Jayant says, “Before you confront a liar and cheater, look at the label and timeline of your relationship. If it was just casual dating, then why bother putting yourself through so much torment to confront them? They chose to cheat on you. They did the wrong thing here. You pick yourself up and move on. 

    “Because if you question them, they can say, ‘Since we aren’t serious about each other, why should I inhibit myself from seeing others?’ They will wash their hands off the whole matter. In such unlabeled relationships, you won’t get the satisfaction of their apology, regret, or guilt. This is one of the signs they never loved you and they don’t really care about their actions or how it affects you. So why bother at all?”

    But if it’s a serious relationship, then you must question your cheating spouse, and you need to know how. The right confrontation strategy does not just include things to say to a cheater or how to say them. There are three main aspects to the process:

    • Before confrontation: This includes preparing yourself with the right tools before you approach your cheating husband or wife
    • During confrontation: This is the actual conversation part. It includes everything you need to do to challenge them responsibly, what to say to a cheater and how to say it
    • After confrontation: Post confrontation, the ordeal is not over. You need to strategize how to give your cheating wife or husband and yourself time and space so that no rash decisions are made

    Knowing that the right confrontation planning includes everything from pre-confrontation to post-confrontation will allow you not to stuff the confrontation part with 100% of your emotions. Below are some of the things to keep in mind when confronting a cheater. 

    1. Gather the evidence

    So you suspect your mate of cheating. You have a strong hunch that they are emotionally invested or physically involved with someone else. They could be engaged in virtual cheating by having an online affair. But to approach them you need evidence. Without evidence, if your partner outrightly negates your accusations, you wouldn’t be left with a choice but to half-heartedly move forward. This can also cause irreparable damage to the relationship.

    You also need evidence to be absolutely sure of your accusations. This security will help you feel confident and more relaxed when approaching your partner. Evidence can be of any and all kinds. Everything you have will not necessarily be incriminating evidence but it will be useful. Even small signs and seemingly irrelevant pieces of evidence can become parts of a bigger puzzle.

    • Bills and receipts of unexplained purchases
    • Transactions that show your partner was somewhere they shouldn’t have been
    • Confirmation from someone who saw your partner with someone else
    • Social media search history
    • Duplicate accounts on social media with an alias
    • Email or text trail and call records for phone cheaters

    Related Reading: How To Make A Cheating Boyfriend Feel Bad – 11 Surefire Ways

    2. Use writing as a tool to assemble your thoughts

    Jayant says, “You can begin to settle your thoughts by writing all the things you want to say. The reason behind this is so you can hold yourself together and don’t break down during confrontation. You have been gravely wronged, but you need to be strong.” Here are a few writing prompts that can help you stay calm and have more clarity:

    • How do you feel right now?
    • What do you want from the conversation?
    • What is the end goal of the confrontation? Would you be willing to forgive? Or do you want to end the relationship?
    • What do you think you need from your partner to make things better?
    • What will you say to your partner? Practice writing the dialogue
    • What do you want to know from them? How much or how little?

    After you have done this make sure to release your expectations before entering the conversation. You will approach your partner responsibly, expecting a sincere response, but ultimately, you can not predict how they will react. Don’t “expect” a terrible response, nor a great one. Do your part and see what it brings.

    3. Select the right time and place

    Jayant says, “This is one of the first things to think about when you are planning to confront your cheating spouse. You want everything to be on your side, including time and setting. Select a safe place where you can be comfortable. You also don’t want any distractions and disturbances. Don’t have this conversation when you or they are driving.”

    If you have suspicions of cheating, you might want to barge into your partner’s office and create a scene at their workplace, especially if you suspect that they are having an affair with a coworker. But, don’t! Don’t challenge them when they are hanging out with their friends because those people might end up defending their friend (your partner) and make them look like the victim. You need to know how to out a cheater smartly by being mindful of the ‘where’ and ‘when’.

    Another thing to take care of is your children if you have any. Make sure that your children do not witness this conversation. You can send them to a family member or a trusted friend. Do not rely on “keeping the voice down” or “Let’s talk when the children are asleep.” Tempers can flare during such conversations.

    Related Reading: 21 Signs Of Lack Of Respect In A Relationship

    4. Remain objective

    When you confront a cheating boyfriend without proof, they might react impulsively. Any cheating partner would react like that. They might twist the entire narrative when you are not confident or weak. It’s very difficult to not burst out crying but this is not the time to cry or open the floodgate of feelings.

    Jayant says, “Imagine you are a lawyer who is presenting your own case. Be in control of your emotions while confronting a cheater. It sounds impossible but it’s doable.” There are 7 types of cheaters. My former partner was a serial cheater. When I challenged him about his cheating, I was howling. My body was out of sync with my mind. I refused to be sane or have a rational conversation. I acted like a wounded victim when I was supposed to play it strong. Looking back I should have been more in control. Handle a cheater by:

    • Remaining objective, calm, and dispassionate
    • Using a detached formal tone
    • Having a business-like approach to the entire confrontation meeting
    • Using statements that reflect what was found and what you felt, instead of accusing them of what they did
    • For example, “I found out that you have a second account on Facebook that I know nothing about. I saw that you chatted with a person named, X. I feel betrayed/disappointed/shocked/hurt/pained. Please explain yourself.”

    5. Lay down your evidence 

    Now is the time to lay down all the hard facts. When you confront a cheating boyfriend without proof or any cheating partner with no speck of evidence, they will say that it’s just your over-possessive nature that’s giving rise to such baseless suspicion. Don’t give them a chance to wiggle their way out of this.

    Jayant shares, “You need to logically lay down your evidence. You can’t just approach them and say that your instincts are telling you that they are cheating on you. While your intuition could be 100% correct, you need data to make them confess.” If they deny cheating on you, then it’s one of the signs you are dating a fuccboi who can’t take accountability for his actions.

    6. Give the cheater a chance to speak

    Jayant says, “While confronting your boyfriend about cheating, don’t dump all the evidence and hurl abuses at him. Don’t stand up to your cheating partner by name-calling or by taking a dig at their character. Give them a chance to speak without prejudice. Don’t make personal remarks because if and when you are looking for ways to reconnect after a big fight like this, the vicious name-calling and snide remarks will make it difficult to move past. It will forever stand between the two of you.

    “The reason that you need to confront a liar and cheater without prejudgment is because there is always a microscopic chance you could be wrong. How you conduct yourself during these pivotal times will matter later in the relationship if you decide to give them another chance.”

    Related Reading: Fighting In A Marriage – 10 Tips To Do It Right

    7. Don’t assume you have the upper hand

    Jayant adds, “When you confront a cheater with evidence, the hurt and betrayal can get to your head and make you act in unnatural ways. You will think they are at your mercy. You will be mean, rude, and pass snide comments. Show a little humility out of the possibility that you could be wrong even if the chances are minimal. Ask yourself ‘Is he cheating or am I paranoid?’ before you go all out on them. “

    Your reaction to their disloyalty can cause a lot of damage. When we think of confrontation, we often imagine a dramatic movie scenario. Breaking things, throwing stuff at them, grabbing their collar, or even indulging in physical abuse like pushing your partner or hitting them. These are extremely unhealthy. Not just for them, but also for you.

    8. Prepare yourself for a dramatic reaction

    Jayant says, “When you confront your cheating spouse, be prepared for an emotional outburst from their side. You’ve caught them off guard. They don’t have a defense yet, so they will try to make you feel uncomfortable by shouting and creating a disruption.”

    When you confront a liar and cheater unexpectedly, the stages of guilt often don’t begin right away. They are reacting out of disbelief that their infidelity has unraveled and that you were smart enough to collect evidence against them. They might cry, scream, yell, and throw things around/at you.”

    Jayant adds, “Along with the above-mentioned point, you also need to be prepared that they might accept their disloyalty and end it all. They will hold themselves accountable for everything.” When you confront a cheater with evidence, they might think you have cornered them. They will try to escape this by ending the relationship itself. Prepare yourself for this reaction as well.

    Tips on how to confront someone for cheating

    9. Don’t ask for all the details 

    Jayant says, “When you are confronting your partner about cheating and deceit, ask yourself how many of the painstaking details you want to know. If they answer everything truthfully, your curiosity will get the better of you and you will visualize everything.

    If you reach the reconciliation phase, your mind will flash these images. Some details are better left undisclosed for your peace of mind. You need to know how to love yourself if you want to move on from this relationship. It will be better for your mental health when you stop fixating on the details of his affair.”

    Your spouse has violated the rules of monogamy. It’s common to be curious but don’t make the mistakes I made. When I stood up to my previous partner, I was so inquisitive about everything. I wanted to know where they did it. How many times? In the bedroom? Which hotel? What was she wearing? None of the answers made anything better. It only intensified my trauma. 

    confront your cheating spouse

    10. Don’t take the blame on yourself 

    Always keep in mind that cheating is a choice. It’s selfish and shows their lack of self-esteem. If they respected you and the relationship, they would never do this to you. Your partner cheating on you does not say anything about you. It’s only a reflection of their mental state. They might try to make you feel like you too are at fault in this episode, but make sure you don’t go down that rabbit hole. It won’t do you any good. 

    When asked on Reddit if cheating is a choice or a mistake, one user said, “Knocking over a glass of milk is a mistake. Cheating is VERY much intentional.” Tell yourself and your partner that you can share the responsibility of a relationship gone wrong, or unmet expectations of your partner, or a marital crisis. But the responsibility of infidelity lies on your promiscuous partner alone.

    11. Give each other space to process and respond

    Yes, it’s true, your partner cheated on you, and that should take away any rights they have, shouldn’t it? But if you want to move forward from this, go through each of the infidelity recovery stages, you have to exercise some patience. Accusations of infidelity are hard to take. These conversations can be very tough. If you or your partner need some space to decide “What are the next steps?”, allow each other that.

    You don’t have to forgive them. But you don’t have to decide everything right away either. Make sure, however, that your partner asks for a reasonable time from you to react. They shouldn’t see this as an opportunity to dodge the ball. You can do so by clearly expressing your intent of continuing the conversation after a little while.

    Related Reading: 11 Ways Being Cheated On Changes You

    How Do Cheaters React When Confronted

    Your partner has been having their romantic escapades behind your back. Let’s say you confront a cheater when you snooped around to gather evidence against them. To successfully confront someone for cheating you need to also be prepared for their response. There are many shocking things cheaters say when they are caught.

    When you confront a liar and cheater, there are no right and wrong answers. Provided your partner takes responsibility for their actions and asks you what you need to fix their mistake. Your partner’s first reaction can be denial, or shifting the blame on you – shock and embarrassment can make one do that – but they should ideally switch to taking accountability soon after. Below are some of the common phrases most people use :

    Reaction Statements
    Denial “What rubbish! It wasn’t me. I don’t even know this person”
    “Someone is brainwashing you”
    “It’s just rumors and gossip”
    Anger “How could you even think I would cheat on you?”
    “How dare you accuse me of cheating?”
    “Is this your level of faith in me?”
    Blame-shifting “You weren’t meeting my needs”
    “You were always busy/tired/not in the mood”
    “You were always fighting with me”
    Playing the victim card “I felt trapped in the relationship”
    “I was going through a lot at work/in my personal life”
    “She/he lured me into their trap”
    Accusations “Are you accusing me of cheating because it’s you who’s actually cheating on me?”
    “You are just jealous/controlling/overprotective”
    “How dare you check my phone? You have invaded my privacy”
    Gaslighting* “Stop being so insecure.”
    “You are just imagining things. Are you okay? Do you need help?”
    “You are supposed to believe me. And you choose to believe a piece of paper?”

    *Take this “Am I being gaslighted” quiz to find out if you are

    Guilt “It was just sex. You are the only person I care about”
    “There was no emotional connection. I don’t love her”
    “It was a stupid mistake and it happened only once”
    When you catch someone cheating they can say the worst things

    You have your answer now for what to do when someone is cheating on you. You are familiar with their reactions. Let’s say they accept, apologize for cheating, and want to make it better. What are you going to do now? Are you ready to repair the relationship and address the underlying issues that have surfaced? Or do you want to dump them and move on? Jayant says, “A lot of people are so immersed in their grief that all they care about is the confrontation. They don’t sit back and think about the things that will follow after that.”

    Key Pointers

    • To learn how to deal with cheaters you need to spend time and energy preparing yourself before confronting them
    • If you suspect infidelity from your partner, back your gut feeling with evidence. Small pieces of evidence can work together to create an incriminating piece of evidence
    • Picking the right time and place, remaining objective, using “I” language, giving the cheater time to respond, and making sure you listen is the best way to confront someone and can create a big difference in the way things turn out
    • Be prepared for all kinds of responses and don’t approach this with an expectation of how it must go
    • Take professional help from a relationship counselor to navigate this phase better

    It’s not just about learning the tips to confront someone for cheating, it’s also about how to move forward afterward. Infidelity is a sensitive issue to deal with and professional counseling can prove to be extremely helpful in the matter.

    You can seek individual counseling to learn how to deal with your partner’s infidelity. If you and your partner decide to give it another chance, couple’s therapy can assist you with the tools of trust building, forgiveness, and moving on. Should you need that help, Bonobology’s panel of experts is here for you.

    This article has been updated in April 2023.

    11 Tell-Tale Signs He Will Cheat In The Future

    How To Love Someone Truly In A Relationship

    Mind Games In Relationships – What They Look Like And Why People Do It

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  • Listening and Empathy in Action

    Listening and Empathy in Action

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    Written by dating coach for men Gary Gunn – Founder of Social Attraction

    In this blog, I will teach you how to connect with women according to behavioral psychology.

    Understanding the principles of active listening and empathy will significantly improve your interactions with women.

    📖 Keep reading to transform your dating life and don’t forget to subscribe to my newsletter for more exclusive content and expert advice.

    Active Listening: The Key to Understanding

    The first step in connecting with women is to engage in active listening.

    This is the process of paying close attention to what the other person is saying and giving them space to express their thoughts and feelings without interruption.

    To practice active listening:

    • Focus: Avoid multitasking and give the person speaking your undivided attention.
    • Be patient: Allow them to finish speaking before responding.
    • Paraphrase: Summarize their thoughts and ask clarifying questions to show you’re engaged.

    Empathy: Walking in Their Shoes

    Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others.

    It helps bridge the gap between your world and theirs, creating a stronger connection.

    When you empathize with someone, you genuinely appreciate their experiences and emotions.

    To demonstrate empathy:

    • Be open-minded: Avoid making judgments and remain open to different perspectives.
    • Validate emotions: Acknowledge and validate their feelings, even if you don’t agree with them.
    • Offer support: Show that you’re there for them, and offer your help if appropriate.

    Body Language and Nonverbal Cues

    Effective communication isn’t limited to words.

    Pay attention to body language and nonverbal cues to deepen your connection.

    Here is how to improve your body language:

    • Eye contact: Maintain appropriate eye contact to show you’re interested and attentive.
    • Facial expressions: Use facial expressions to convey understanding and empathy.
    • Gestures: Use open and inviting gestures to signal warmth and receptivity.

    Asking Open-Ended Questions

    To encourage women to open up and share more about themselves, ask open-ended questions.

    These questions require more than a simple “yes” or “no” answer, prompting deeper conversations.

    Example questions: 

    • “What led you to choose your career?”
    • “How do you handle stress in your life?”
    • “What’s your favorite way to unwind after a long day?”

    Emotional Intelligence: Awareness and Regulation

    Developing emotional intelligence helps you become more aware of your own emotions and the emotions of others.

    This awareness allows you to manage your emotions and respond to situations more effectively.

    Here is how to have more emotional intelligence: 

    • Self-awareness: Recognize and understand your own emotions and their impact on others.
    • Self-regulation: Manage your emotions to foster healthy and productive interactions.
    • Social awareness: Identify and respond to the emotions and needs of others.

    Discover Shared Interests and Values

    Finding common ground is crucial in establishing connections with others.

    Shared interests and values allow for deeper conversations and mutual understanding.

    To identify shared interests and values:

    • Be curious: Genuinely inquire about their hobbies, passions, and beliefs.
    • Be open: Share your own interests and values without dominating the conversation.
    • Engage: Discuss your commonalities and explore how these interests or values have shaped your lives.

    Practice Active Appreciation and Gratitude

    Appreciation and gratitude can strengthen relationships and foster a positive atmosphere.

    By expressing gratitude for the qualities and actions of the person you’re interacting with, you can create a bond built on mutual respect.

    To practice active appreciation and gratitude:

    • Be specific: Point out particular qualities or actions you genuinely admire about them.
    • Be timely: Express appreciation soon after you observe the admirable quality or action.
    • Be sincere: Ensure your compliments come from an authentic place and are not superficial or forced.

    Foster Trust Through Vulnerability

    Building trust is vital in forming deep connections.

    By being open and vulnerable, you can create a safe space for the other person to do the same.

    To foster trust through vulnerability:

    • Share personal experiences: Open up about your own challenges and victories, showing your authentic self.
    • Be supportive: Encourage them to share their stories and experiences, assuring them that you’re a safe and non-judgmental listener.
    • Create boundaries: Recognize and respect each other’s emotional limits and be mindful not to push too far.

    Summary

    • Connecting with women doesn’t have to be daunting. Remember, practice makes perfect.
    • By focusing on demonstrating empathy and emotional intelligence, you can create lasting and meaningful connections.
    • When you implement these principles in your daily life, you’ll find your ability to connect with women will continually improve.

    Resources

    1. LaBounty, H.S., Dovidio, J.F., & MacInnis, C.C. (2021) Title: The Effects of Active Listening on Empathy and Rapport in Dyadic Interactions Journal: Journal of Nonverbal Behavior, Volume 45, pages 461–480. This study highlights the importance of active listening in developing empathy and rapport in dyadic interactions. It found that engaging in active listening techniques led to higher levels of self-reported empathy and rapport in participants.
    2. Pérez-González, J.C., & Alonso-Nieto, H. (2005) Title: Emotional Intelligence and Interpersonal Relations Journal: Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, Volume 22, pages 675–689. This study explores the role of emotional intelligence in fostering healthy and successful interpersonal relationships. The findings suggest that individuals with higher emotional intelligence tend to have better interpersonal skills and develop stronger bonds with others.
    3. Aron, A., Melinat, E., Aron, E.N., Vallone, R.D., & Bator, R.J. (1997) Title: The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness: A Procedure and Some Preliminary Findings Journal: Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, Volume 23, pages 363–377. This study investigates the role of self-disclosure and vulnerability in creating interpersonal closeness. The results show that gradually sharing personal information and experiences in a reciprocal manner can lead to increased feelings of connection and closeness between individuals.

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    Gary Gunn

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  • Introducing Stitch Travel: come to Japan and be part of history!

    Introducing Stitch Travel: come to Japan and be part of history!

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    Before we announce the amazing, historic, and potentially life-changing very first Stitch Trip, we need to make something clear: if your personal commitments or financial situation prevent you from coming along, please don’t worry. Over time, we hope to give Stitch members an opportunity to experience hundreds of travel opportunities, across a wide variety of budgets and locations, as a new way to strengthen existing relationships with other members, and build new ones. Having a range of budgets is vitally important, as we are acutely aware that many Stitch members face significant financial constraints, particularly in today’s environment. We don’t want members to miss out on forming social connections through travel simply because they can’t afford it. ClubAdventures is able to create trips that range from luxury through to very basic camping-style experiences, and we hope in time to announce something for everyone. (And for those who can’t travel at all, please remember that travel is only ever going to be a small part of what the community is all about. Travel might be great, but it’s the social connections you form in the community that are priceless.) OK, with that disclaimer out of the way, let’s get on to the exciting announcement of our very first Stitch Trip. (Although you may have already guessed where it is from the pictures in this article! For the very first trip, we needed to pick something very special. After all, there is only ever going to be one “first” trip — it’s history in the making. It needed to be somewhere roughly the same distance for all our largest memberships — in North America, the UK, and Australia — to travel to. It needed to be the sort of trip that could support a large group, as we didn’t want lots of Stitch members to miss out on being part of this incredible experience. It needed to be what ClubAdventures calls a “Premium” trip, so we could make sure the trip was absolutely going to deliver on its promise of being an incredible experience. Finally, it needed to be to a country I wanted to travel to. Wait, what? Yes, you read that right — I’ve already reserved my spot on the trip as traveller #0001! There was absolutely no way I was going to miss out on being there for the very first Stitch Trip in history, so it had to be one of the ClubAdventures trips that I really wanted to go on myself. When we took all those factors into account, there was really only one trip it could be: the unique, the incredible, the absolutely amazing … Flavors of Japan!


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    Andrew Dowling
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  • Online Dating, Oh the things that you’ll see….

    Online Dating, Oh the things that you’ll see….

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    Let’s just begin with I’m never, ever bored with my job. Why? I just never know what’s going to happen next…what a client divulges to me as I choke on my spinach wrap and hurry to hit mute, an online dating site message a client forwards to me with the words “Help…how should I respond to this person”, or the laughter we shared about a date gone well that lasted 17 hours….and so on, and so on.

    My Totally 10 Random List of Online Dating Stuff:

    1. Car Photos and Men
    Ok, my female clients and I are constantly perplexed with intelligent men and their car photos. Then, over the past week, two men “mansplained” it to me.

    After a new client sent me his photos (oh, to be fair, he sent me 8 but one was the inevitable car shot) —-and yes, he looked good in the photo; the car was cool and a gorgeous color too. I said “why the car shot”? He said you asked for photos with me and my interests so I sent golf, a family shot, skiing, and I collect and love cars”. Suddenly it made total sense to me.


    Ok, here we go with another male client this week as well. He sent me 16 photos, 12 were very good, and 4 were him and different cars. Once again, just so I am understanding men and the car thing, I asked the same question again. He simply said that he loves car, they are one of his interests, he played with Hot Wheels as a kid and collected them—and thought nothing of posing by a car. His dad collected cars; now he collects AND fixes cars. Yep, a CEO guy. He said it’s the same as him putting on the green or cooking in the kitchen. It’s not a boasting thing for him—just part of who he is.

    An AHHHHHA moment for me. Yes, some men pose with cars as a status symbol. But more pose because it’s a genuine interest! Bottomline, don’t let a car shot stop you from reaching out from that great sounding man on POF, Hinge, Match, Bumble, wherever!

    2. Bathroom Photos

    Ok, guys, honestly, I’m not picking on you. There is not a single good reason in the world for a bathroom shot/bathroom selfie. None.

    3. Own it
    Ladies, you’re up to bat. So, what if you are 42, 58, 68 or 77 years old? Don’t start a relationship with a lie. And if you think men can’t tell a woman who posted her age as 67 is actually 78, you’re dreaming.

    4. Date your photos
    Let me tell you about Amelia—a pretty, gracious 67-year-old woman from Palm Beach. She averages 1-2 high quality dates per week. Guess what almost every man has told her? “You look exactly like your photos” they say with a sigh of relief. She also dates every single photo with month/year—all are from 2022-2023. Oh, and BTW I cracked up when she told me this: Andrea, I’ve been telling the men to be patient as I have a queue and need to catch up. And they wait!

    Also written in her online dating profile is “If you are fudging on your photos or age, please pass me by!”

    5. People can’t change…or can they
    I’ve always held fast to you can’t change someone you are dating or married to (my only exception is perhaps upgrading their wardrobe!). And you shouldn’t expect them to change for you, right? A 53-year-old NY male client of mine (recently engaged…yay!) and I caught up this week and we got started on this topic. He pointed out change and adaptability are two different things—and adaptability in a relationship is necessary. I liked the way he made this distinction.

    6. Ask about their children/family
    Not in an interrogative type of way! But you will learn a heck of a lot about a person about how they describe children, or a family member. But don’t ask about the ex on a first date!

    7. 50/50 Conversations on First Dates
    In general, they don’t exist! In over 25+ years of being a dating coach, men tend to talk about 70% of the time on first date. Ok, don’t worry! It generally switches on the second date to a more even keeled conversation. For men, sometimes it’s nerves—sometimes it’s a genetic thing I can’t explain!!!

    8. Beware of the Pen Pal Syndrome
    Yay—you’re messaging and it’s going well. If it goes more than 5 exchanges with no date scheduled, you are stuck. Break it. Make the move. Simply write: “love our conversations. How’s Tuesday or Wednesday for a drink after work around 6 at Chez Gabi?”. You’ll know fast—they accept, great. Otherwise, who needs a message buddy?

    9. FaceTime is not a date
    Neither are phone calls. They are a prelude to a real date. So, get off the phone. And make an in real life date.

    10. Italy
    Ok, who doesn’t love Italy? But if you have the travel bug and go on and on and on about Italy, stop. (Ok, this goes for any place but Italy seems to be the number one place people talk about). You’re not on Trip Advisor. Mention a few unique experiences to you that you’ve had traveling then share other interests. That’s why a good online dating profile writer is key. And no more photos of a well-known travel destination without you in the picture—we all want to see you, not the Parthenon!

    Happy Dating, all and Happy Easter (if you celebrate it)!

    Warmly,

    Andrea McGinty
    Dating Coach/Dating Counselor
    702-494-7344
    Founder, 33000Dates.com

    #datingtips

    #datingexpert

    #writingonlinedatingprofile

    #onlinedatingphotos

    #datingcounselor

    #33000Dates

    #itsjustlunch

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    Andrea McGinty

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  • THESE 5 Items In Your Place Will Keep Her Coming Back…

    THESE 5 Items In Your Place Will Keep Her Coming Back…

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    THESE 5 Items In Your Place Will Keep Her Coming Back…

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    Tripp Advice

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  • 40 New Relationship Questions You Should Surely Ask

    40 New Relationship Questions You Should Surely Ask

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    A new relationship can only blossom through one way, and that is through sincere curiosity for your partner. So if you need some new relationship questions to ask each other, we have what you are looking for.

    It’s how you will get to know your partner and figure out if they are meant for you. Knowing which questions to ask can even be the difference between a fruitful relationship or a failed one. This is why we at Bonobology have created a list of new relationship questions to ask him or her to give your new romance a fighting chance.

    40 New Relationship Questions You Should Surely Ask

    Starting a new relationship is exciting. There is a certain thrill to discovering who your partner is and what similarities the two of you share. However, there are so many things to ask about so many areas of their life that it might get overwhelming since you don’t know where to start.

    If you wish to have a list of questions for the girl you’re dating or need some questions to ask a guy in a new relationship, look no further. We have compiled a list of 40 new relationship questions to ask your partner, and divided them into 8 important categories.

    Questions To Find Out If It Is Serious

    The first important conversation you will have in a new relationship is when the two of you try to decide if your relationship is serious or casual. This is a topic that makes new couples nervous as they are afraid that the other person might not feel the same way as them. Due to the importance of the topic, it is important to discuss this in a light-hearted way to prevent any embarrassment or hurt feelings. Here are some fun questions to ask in a new relationship to see if it is serious or not.

    1. Is our relationship exclusive?

    This could be the most awkward question to ask due to the fear of rejection. However, you need to ask this for a stable and mutually beneficial relationship.

    2. Where do you see us one/two/five years down the line?

    It’s the best way to judge how serious your partner is about the relationship and if it is moving forward at all. It will reveal if your partner views your dynamic as a fling, or if they are serious about you.

    For more expert-backed insights, please subscribe to our YouTube Channel.

    3. Do you factor me in while making personal decisions?

    This question reveals how much respect your partner has for you while also letting you know where you lie on the list of your partner’s priorities.

    4. Are you satisfied with me or are you looking for something more?

    This can be a nerve-racking question to ask, but if you hope to be in a long-term relationship, you should be asking this as often as you can.

    5. Do you want me to meet your family?

    This is a question whose answer could hurt you, but you need to ask it anyway to judge if the relationship means anything to them or not.

    Questions To Ask About Their Family

    If you are interested in a serious relationship, understanding each other’s family background and traditions is critical. If you have ever wondered what your new partner’s family is like, here’s our list of new relationship questions to see if you would get along with each other’s family.

    Related Reading: 36 Questions To Ask Before Marriage – No#11 Is A Must!

    6. How close are you to your family?

    This question will reveal your partner’s views on family dynamics, its place and history in their life, and how family-oriented they are. It could also be a serious, sad, but important discussion if they don’t get along with their family because of the latter’s abusive or disrespectful behavior.

    7. Are there any traits amongst your family members that annoy you?

    This is a fun question to ask which will make your partner tell you all about their family gossip. It can be an interesting way to spend some quality time together on a lazy afternoon.

    8. What are some family traditions that you truly enjoy?

    Traditions are certainly important. This new relationship question for her/him will let you know what traditions you should pay extra attention to in order to make your partner feel comfortable and compatible with you.

    9. Would you prefer to live with your family or on your own?

    This is an interesting question to ask as it reveals your partner’s current standing in life, the lifestyle they prefer, and what you could look forward to if you ever reach the point of marriage.

    10. Do you factor in your family’s opinion while making decisions?

    This question is vital. Asking this question will let you know if your partner is capable of standing their ground against their family, or if they will roll over and bow to the decisions of other people.

    Related Reading: 15 Tips That Keep A Relationship Strong And Happy

    Questions To Gauge Your Partner’s Ambitions

    Understanding someone’s level of ambition is crucial to knowing if the relationship will succeed or not. According to research, couples with very different levels of ambition tend to break up as neither can truly satisfy the other in the relationship. It can also lead to many fights as one person will start to believe that the other is an anchor that is dragging them down. Due to its importance, here are some new relationship questions you can ask to check if your partner’s ambition matches your own.

    11. Do you have any goals that are yet unachieved?

    This lets you know what your partner wants their life to look like, and also tells you what their priorities are.

    12. What would you need for you to be able to say “I have everything I have ever wanted”?

    This question will let you know if your partner’s needs and goals are realistic or if they are constantly unsatisfied. It will help you know if you are compatible for a long-term relationship.

    13. Would you prefer to have a really successful career, or a fulfilling personal life?

    This is an insightful question that will reveal the personality of the person you are dating.

    14. What do you want your legacy to be?

    This question serves two purposes. The first lets you know their value systems and what is truly important to them, and the second lets you know what level of social recognition your partner craves.

    Related Reading: Are You A Pluviophile? 12 Reasons You Could Be One!

    15. What kind of lifestyle are you aiming for?

    This particular question is of great importance as your lifestyle goals need to be close to your partner’s for the two of you to have a successful relationship.

    Fun Questions To Know Each Other’s Hobbies

    These are some fun questions to ask in a new relationship to gauge your partner’s likes and interests. It’s important to ask these questions in a new relationship to know if you would enjoy spending time with them. This set of new relationship questions are light-hearted as they are a way for you to get to know your new partner. Here are a few of them.

    16. What are your favorite ways to spend your free time?

    This question will let you know what activities you should look forward to in a shared space, and will tell you about their coping mechanisms too. Studies like this also show that having shared hobbies between couples is important.

    17. What is a skill that you wish to learn?

    This question reveals your partner’s interests and personal goals, and might help you find common ground.

    18. Would you prefer a walk on the beach, or a day of watching movies?

    This is a question that can help you plan the perfect date, while also letting you know what activities your partner would detest.

    19. What do you like about your favorite hobby?

    This is an insightful question that will reveal why your partner likes certain hobbies or activities over others. A crucial question to ask if you want to know your partner better.

    20. What is something that never fails to make you laugh?

    This lets you understand your partner’s sense of humor, and also gives you an easy way to help cheer them up when they feel low.

    Questions To Understand Each Other’s Values

    Personal values form some of the first important questions to ask in a new relationship. Shared values can lead to that first spark and are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Here are some new relationship questions you can ask your partner to see if the two of you share enough values to maintain a healthy and long-lasting relationship. This is also a great way to separate a serious relationship from a casual one.

    21. Do you believe that you handle your finances appropriately?

    This question lets you know how responsible your partner is and if they can be depended on

    22. What do you believe the division of labor should be in a relationship?

    This lets you know how much effort you and your partner would need to put in for a stable home life.

    Related Reading: 8 Habits Of Couples In Strong And Healthy Relationships

    23. Are you interested in having kids, and if so, how do you intend to raise them?

    This is an extremely important question to ask as research shows that disagreements over children is the most common cause for a failed relationship.

    24. How do you handle disagreements and negative emotions?

    This question will let you know about their conflict style, how emotionally and mentally mature they are, and if they are the type of person you want to be with.

    25. What are some relationship deal-breakers for you?

    This needs no explanation, it is an obvious question that needs to be asked if you intend to have an honest relationship right from the beginning.

    Spicy Questions About Sex

    If you have ever wanted to learn some fun questions to ask a guy in a new relationship, here they are. And not just a guy, this is a topic anyone would love to talk about. Sex is a natural and healthy part of most relationships and understanding each other’s expectations when it comes to sex is necessary for a mutually beneficial bond.

    Here are some new relationship questions to ask him/her to understand each other’s wants, limits, and kinks in a safe and secure manner. These will definitely spice things up with your partner in the bedroom.

    26. How frequently do you need sex in a relationship?

    This question can help you create a healthy and satisfying sex life by knowing exactly what you’re signing up for, and how to negotiate according to your own needs

    27. Are there any sexual acts that you are strictly against?

    This question lets you know what sexual boundaries cannot be crossed. Partners in loving relationships can go through abuse too if boundaries aren’t talked about.

    28. What are some of your kinks or fantasies?

    This will help you get to know your partner better while allowing the two of you to fulfill each other’s fantasies, if you’re both comfortable with them

    29. What is something you’ve always wanted to do in bed ?

    This question will help provide an insight into your partner’s deepest desires and preferences

    30. How important do you think sex is in a relationship?

    This question is extremely important to help set realistic expectations for each other, and helps prevent sexual frustration.

    Related Reading: The 7 Types Of Boundaries You Need To Make Your Relationship Stronger

    Questions To Set And Manage Expectations

    Now, it is time for some serious questions to ask in a new relationship. For any relationship that you enter, you and your partner should know what is expected from each other if you want your relationship to succeed. Coming up next are a set of 5 serious questions to ask in a new relationship which will help you and your partner set realistic goals for each other to prevent disappointment and frustration.

    31. What are some things you would like me to do as a partner?

    This question helps give each other a clear idea of the roles and responsibilities that need to be mutually met

    32. What is the minimum amount of time you think a couple should spend together?

    This question will let you know how compatible the two of you are as a couple and what qualifies as ‘quality time’ for both of you

    33. When you are going through a difficult situation, how would you like me to support you?

    This is an extremely important question to ask as it will help you and your partner navigate difficult situations with compassion

    34. What is something you refuse to compromise on in a relationship?

    This should be one of the first questions asked to ensure that no one is put into an unhealthy, awkward, or unpleasant situation. If you feel like they know they would compromise the right way in the relationship, then they are the right one for you.

    35. What do you think this relationship needs to continue to thrive?

    This question will help you and your partner understand each other’s shortcomings, while giving you ways to overcome them

    Important Questions About Their Past Relationships

    This is another set of serious questions to ask in a new relationship. Talking about past relationships is going to be a touchy subject for most people. So, approach this with caution. However, this topic needs to be talked about so that you can understand your partner’s traumas, likes, and dislikes. Here are some important questions to ask in a new relationship to ensure that neither of you repeat the mistakes of the past and to allow your new relationship to blossom, the way it is meant to.

    36. Why did your last relationship end?

    This lets you know what pitfalls to avoid, and if they have learned any lessons from their past.

    37. What was something that happened in your last relationship that you don’t want a repeat of?

    This teaches you what their boundaries, insecurities, flaws, and triggers are and can help your relationship last longer.

    38. What is something you miss about your past relationship?

    This teaches you what they value and the type of relationships they are looking for.

    39. What did you learn from your past relationship?

    This forces them to be honest about their journey of self-improvement and to reflect upon where they stand.

    40. Have you healed from your breakup or do you still need time?

    While there’s nothing wrong with continuing to heal from a past relationship in the space of a new relationship, this question will tell you what their heart wants. If they need more time to move on, then you can make your decision accordingly – wait or leave.

    These are the most important new relationship questions for her or him. By asking these, you would have all the basic knowledge that is required for any new relationship to thrive. This can also be a great way to spend an intimate afternoon with your partner.

    Key Pointers

    • Your questions for your new partner should revolve around sex, commitment, mutual expectations, and personal values
    • To see how compatible the relationship is, ask questions about their hobbies, family life, and ambitions
    • Asking about past relationships can be awkward, but it will help you understand your partner’s needs, priorities, expectations, and boundaries

    This list of new relationship questions should serve as a guide to grow closer to them. While these are some great beginning questions to ask your partner, the process of getting to know them will never truly end. That means that as long as the two of you are interested in staying together, you will always have questions to ask and stories to share.

    21 Dos And Don’ts When Starting A New Relationship

    16 Pearls Of New Relationship Advice For Ladies By A Man

    12 Signs Your Past Relationships Are Affecting Your Present Relationship

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  • Scientifically Proven Breathwork Techniques for Attracting Women

    Scientifically Proven Breathwork Techniques for Attracting Women

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    Written by dating coach for men Gary Gunn – Founder of Social Attraction

    In this blog, I will teach you some scientifically proven breathwork techniques for attracting women into your life.

    By practicing these techniques, you can enhance your self-esteem, foster emotional well-being, and increase your overall attractiveness.

    🌠 Continue reading to improve your dating success and be sure to sign up for my newsletter for my latest articles.

    Connected Breathing

    Feeling grounded and confident is essential for creating authentic connections.

    The Basic Connected Breathing technique can help you achieve this by focusing on your breath and calming your mind.

    • Find a comfortable position, either lying down or sitting with your back supported.
    • Take deep, full breaths through your mouth, focusing on connecting your inhales and exhales seamlessly.
    • Allow your abdomen to expand on the inhale and contract on the exhale, using your diaphragm for more profound breathing.
    • Continue this pattern for 15-20 minutes or as long as you feel comfortable.

    Practicing this technique regularly can help you feel more grounded, confident, and present in your interactions with potential partners, making you more attractive and approachable.

    Four-Seven-Eight Breathing

    Emotional balance is crucial in attracting a partner who appreciates and values your genuine personality.

    The Four-Seven-Eight Breathing technique helps regulate your nervous system, creating a sense of stability and inner calm.

    • Assume a comfortable seated or lying position.
    • Close your eyes and inhale through your nose for a count of 4.
    • Hold your breath for a count of 7.
    • Exhale through your mouth for a count of 8.
    • Repeat this pattern for several cycles or as long as you feel comfortable.

    This technique fosters emotional balance and a calm demeanor, both of which are attractive qualities in a partner.

    By cultivating these traits, you’ll be better equipped to create deep, lasting connections with potential romantic partners.

    Three-Part Breathing (Dirga Pranayama)

    Self-awareness is a key factor in creating authentic and meaningful connections with others.

    By practicing the Three-Part Breathing technique, you can gain a better understanding of yourself, making it easier to attract a compatible partner.

    • Find a comfortable seated or lying position.
    • Begin by inhaling deeply into your abdomen, feeling your belly rise.
    • Continue inhaling into your ribcage, expanding your ribs outward.
    • Finally, inhale into your chest, lifting your collarbones and filling your lungs completely.
    • Exhale in reverse order, emptying your chest, ribcage, and finally, your abdomen.
    • Continue this three-part breathing for several minutes or as long as you feel comfortable.

    Incorporating the Three-Part Breathing technique into your routine can lead to enhanced self-awareness and self-acceptance.

    By understanding yourself better, you can communicate your values, desires, and boundaries more effectively, making it easier to attract a partner who shares your outlook on life.

    Alternate Nostril Breathing (Nadi Shodhana)

    A focused and clear mind is attractive to potential partners, as it allows for engaging and meaningful conversations.

    Alternate Nostril Breathing can help sharpen your mental clarity, giving you the edge in connecting with others.

    • Find a comfortable seated position.
    • Using your right thumb, close your right nostril and inhale through your left nostril.
    • At the peak of your inhale, close your left nostril with your right ring finger, and release your thumb from your right nostril.
    • Exhale through your right nostril.
    • Inhale through your right nostril, close it with your thumb, release your ring finger from your left nostril, and exhale through your left nostril.
    • Continue this pattern, alternating nostrils with each breath, for several minutes or as long as you feel comfortable.

    Practicing Alternate Nostril Breathing regularly can result in improved mental focus and clarity.

    These qualities enable you to engage in deeper, more meaningful conversations with potential romantic partners, increasing your overall attractiveness.

    Summary

    Unlock the Secrets to Dating Success Today!

    Discover how you can use these lessons in the real world with women you find attractive.

    I can coach you to have extreme self-confidence in your dating life and get the success you desire.

    🔥 Explore My Life-Changing Courses Now! 🔥

    Resources

    1. Brown, R. P., & Gerbarg, P. L. (2005). Sudarshan Kriya yogic breathing in the treatment of stress, anxiety, and depression: Part I-neurophysiologic model. Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, 11(1), 189-201. This study explores the effects of Sudarshan Kriya Yoga, a breathwork technique, on stress, anxiety, and depression, which may be relevant to emotional regulation and stress reduction.
    2. Goyal, M., Singh, S., Sibinga, E. M., Gould, N. F., Rowland-Seymour, A., Sharma, R., … & Haythornthwaite, J. A. (2014). Meditation programs for psychological stress and well-being: a systematic review and meta-analysis. JAMA Internal Medicine, 174(3), 357-368. This systematic review and meta-analysis investigates the effectiveness of meditation programs, which often include breathwork, on psychological stress and well-being, providing insights into the impact of breath awareness and control on mental health.
    3. Sharma, H. (2013). Meditation: Process and effects. Ayu, 36(3), 233-237. This review article discusses various meditation techniques, including pranayama (yogic breathing), and their effects on psychological well-being, cognitive functioning, and emotional regulation. This may provide evidence supporting the benefits of breathwork in enhancing mental clarity and emotional balance.

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  • How To Attract Women Instantly

    How To Attract Women Instantly

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    Written by dating coach for men Gary Gunn – Founder of Social Attraction

    In this article, I explain how you can attract women instantly.

    I give you the science and then the psychology before providing you with some simple action steps to take.

    🌠 Continue reading to improve your dating success and be sure to sign up for my newsletter for my latest articles.

    What science says

    Attraction is influenced by hormones in the body.

    • When a woman sees an attractive man, her brain may release dopamine, creating a positive association and a feeling of pleasure.
    • Testosterone, a hormone linked to confidence and dominance, can also make a man more attractive to women.

    Additionally, by understanding the role of hormones in attraction, a man can use this knowledge to his advantage and increase his chances of attracting a partner.

    What psychology says

    Attraction is driven by a combination of factors, including confidence, social status, and personality.

    Furthermore, being yourself and showing your true personality is key, as women are more likely to be attracted to men who are authentic and genuine.

    Boost your confidence

    Confidence is attractive, so work on building yours.

    • Positive self-talk: Encourage yourself and focus on your strengths.
    • Practicing good posture: Stand up straight and exude confidence.
    • Engaging in activities you enjoy: Pursue hobbies and interests that bring you joy and boost your self-esteem.

    Elevate your social status

    You don’t have to be a CEO to have high social status. You can achieve this by:

    • Volunteering: Give back to your community and increase your social status.
    • Pursuing a new hobby or skill: Expand your knowledge and skillset.
    • Being well-informed and knowledgeable: Read books, attend events, and learn about a variety of topics.

    Show your personality

    Show your personality: Let your personality shine through by:

    • Being yourself: Authenticity is attractive, so let your true self shine.
    • Engaging in conversations that showcase your interests and passions:
    • Share what you love with others and show off your unique personality.

    Use humor

    A good sense of humor is attractive, so don’t be afraid to make a woman laugh. Additionally:

    • Make sure your humor is appropriate: Avoid humor that could be offensive or hurtful.
    • Ensure your humor is not at someone else’s expense
    • Respect others and avoid humor that could be seen as mean-spirited.

    Summary

    • In conclusion, attracting women is not just about looks or money.
    • By understanding the science and psychology behind attraction and using it to your advantage.
    • Become more confident, elevate your social status, show your personality, and use humor to attract women instantly.

    Social Attraction Courses for Dating Success

    If you want to learn more about attracting women into your life, then consider taking one of our Social Attraction courses.

    We can help you become a more desirable man by increasing your status, confidence, and skills in approaching and meeting women.

    🔥 Explore My Life-Changing Courses Now! 🔥

    Resources

    1. Dabbs, J. M., & Dabbs, M. G. (2000). Testosterone and men’s marriages. Hormones and behavior, 38(2), 102-108. A study published in the journal “Hormones and Behavior” found that men who were administered testosterone exhibited more confident and dominant behavior, which made them more attractive to women. Additionally, this supports the idea that hormonal changes can impact attraction.
    2. Anderson, C. A., & Keltner, D. (2001). The local-ladder effect: Social status and subjective well-being. Psychological science, 12(1), 113-118. A study published in the “Journal of Personality and Social Psychology” found that women were more likely to be attracted to men who were seen as high-status, such as those with high levels of education and income. Furthermore, this supports the idea that social status is an important factor in attraction.
    3. Jordan, J., Spencer, S. J., Zanna, M. P., Hoshino-Browne, E., & Correll, J. (2003). Secure and defensive high self-esteem. Journal of Research in Personality, 37(5), 496-529. A study published in the “Journal of Research in Personality” found that women were more attracted to men who were genuine and authentic, rather than those who tried to be someone they were not. Additionally, this supports the idea that being yourself and showing your true personality can be attractive to women.

     

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    Gary Gunn

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  • The Abortion Pill Ruling Is Here—and It’s Terrible

    The Abortion Pill Ruling Is Here—and It’s Terrible

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    Two federal courts issued two different—and contradictory—rulings in the ongoing fight over approval of mifepristone—which the FDA approved over two decades ago—one of two drugs used for medication abortions. It’s all possibly leading up to a fight at the Supreme Court sooner rather than later.

    Join Jess and Imani in this rapid reaction episode for some cathartic rage as they break down what it all means.

    Mentioned in this episode:

    Rewire News Group is a nonprofit media organization, which means that Boom! Lawyered–especially rapid reaction episodes like this one—one are only made possible by the support of listeners like you! If you can, please join our team by donating here.

    And sign up for The Fallout, a weekly newsletter written by Jess that’s exclusively dedicated to covering every aspect of this unprecedented moment.

    The post The Abortion Pill Ruling Is Here—and It’s Terrible appeared first on Rewire News Group.

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  • Top 16 Symbols Of Love With Their Meanings

    Top 16 Symbols Of Love With Their Meanings

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    Love is a beautiful feeling, isn’t it? Makes you want to climb up the clouds and steal all the stars in the night sky for the romantic love of your life. But in your quest to express the depth of your emotions for your significant other, have you ever wondered what are the symbols of love? I have always believed there are as many ways of loving as there are people in the world. Each person loves differently, in their own distinct way. The same goes for universal love symbols.

    There can be as many symbolic expressions of love as there are people in the world who have loved truly and madly. From time immemorial, love has been represented by using different symbols all over the world. The most famous one, as we all know, is a red heart. From Greek mythology to Tarot card reading to cultural symbolisms, love is known by various symbols. My personal symbol for unconditional love is poetry.

    When I fall in love, I fall hard and deep into the burning pit. I end up writing a ton of poems about them. From their personality to their behavior to every little detail that makes them the way they are and how they make me feel. Poetry is my way of showering love upon the person I am smitten with. Would you believe me if I said I have written more than 300 poems about and for one person? Let’s find out other obscure and unexplored symbols of love that people have used and have been using for centuries to convey their love for someone.

    16 Beautiful Symbols Of Love With Their Meaning

    Despite the popular belief of this century, a bouquet of fresh red roses and the red heart emoji aren’t the only symbols for unconditional love. As a matter of fact, different civilizations and cultures use different beautiful symbols of love to convey this beautiful emotion.

    Beyond the traditional symbol of love in the world, there are so many lesser-known emblems that symbolize the most beautiful feeling one can have the privilege of experiencing. Read with this hopeless romantic who turned into a desperate writer and find out the other symbols:

    1. Apple

    No, not the Apple iPhone. Get your head out of technology and gadgets for once, please. I am talking about apples, the fruit, which Adam took a bite of and it got stuck in his throat. The Greeks have honored apples as one of the ancient symbols of love and sexual desires. The ancient Greeks used to believe if you threw an apple at the woman you liked, then you were confessing your love for her.

    If the woman reciprocated the gentleman’s feelings, she would catch the apple or at least attempt to catch it. This healthy fruit was also considered to bring prosperity and fertility. It used to be customary for the bride to eat an apple on her wedding night to ensure her sexual desire and fertility to reproduce offspring. 

    2. Swans

    Swans exude a mesmerizing amount of grace, charm and beauty. Their appearance is straight out of a fairytale. Their elegance, body structure, elongated necks and their posture, everything about them is bewitching. In Greek mythology, Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of love is often depicted as riding a swan.

    Swans are depicted as one of the Greek love symbols of love and loyalty. Their intertwined necks symbolize a connected mind, body and soul of two soulmates. Swans are also among the rare monogamous species. They mate with only one partner for life. That should tell you a lot about undying devotion, love and loyalty. When two swans come together and form the shape of a heart, that sight makes one of the most romantic symbols.

    Related Reading: Is Love Real? 10 Facts To Know If It’s Your True Love Or Not

    3. Cupid

    We have all heard the term “struck by Cupid’s arrow” used to refer to the process of falling in love. Cupid, the baby in a diaper with wings carrying a golden bow and arrows, is the son of Venus, the goddess of love.

    In Roman mythology, Cupid is best known as the god of desire, affection and erotic love. In today’s popular culture, Cupid is one of the widely known symbols of love and is commonly associated with Valentine’s Day. He is sometimes blindfolded in paintings, which is a symbolic way of saying love is blind. 

    4. The harp

    The belief that harps represent love traces its roots to Europe. It is one of the Celtic symbols of love as its origin can be traced back to the ancient Celts who used to play the harp with lyrical poetry. It is known as the bridge of love that connects heaven and Earth in Celtic culture.

    The strings of the harp are believed to form a ladder, which symbolizes our ascent to higher states of love. The harp is one of the devout things that symbolize love in the Bible. It is said that King David played the Harp to the Lord himself to express his undying devotion and love.

    Related Reading: 21 Secret Ways To Say “I Love You” On Text

    5. The ankh

    This is an Egyptian symbol for unconditional love. It is also known as crux ansata, or the “the key of life” or “the cross of life”. These days, the ankh has become a fashion accessory but it has an abundance of historical significance. It symbolizes fertility.

    Some scholars have argued that the loop on top symbolizes the female genitalia while the elongated line represents the masculine counterpart, the penis. Hence, one of the eccentric symbols of love as those two sacred units come together to form a union. The crossbar represents children that come from their union.

    6. Mistletoe

    I am a huge Potterhead. Ever since I saw Harry and Cho Chang share their first kiss under the mistletoe, I have wondered what implications a mistletoe brings. This tradition of finding yourself under the green leafy plant and going in for a passionate kiss has existed long before it was popularized by pop culture and TV series.

    Popular during Christmas time, this act of kissing under the mistletoe originates from Norse mythology and also finds a mention in a 1720 poem. Mistletoe represents love, fertility and vitality, which makes them one of the special and mysterious symbols that represent love.

    Symbols of love

    7. Claddagh

    The Claddagh is one of the well-known symbols of love in ancient Irish culture. Its design includes a hand, heart and crown. The heart represents love. The crown represents loyalty and the two clasped hands represent friendship. The Claddagh is a dazzling symbol of everlasting love. 

    There are specific ways of wearing a Claddagh ring. If you are single and looking for love, then you wear it on the right hand with the heart on the ring pointing away from you. If you are in love, then wear it on your left hand with its heart pointing in.

    8. Doves

    Doves don’t just represent peace but are also one of the earnest symbols of love. They are elegant and attractive-looking birds with unique personalities. Out of all different types of doves, the white one is most commonly used to symbolize love. That’s why when we see two people getting touchy-feely with one another, we tend to use the term “lovey-dovey”.

    Doves produce a gentle cooing sound and the way they take flight is so extremely subtle and beautiful. The reason why they are known as one of the true love symbols is that, like swans, they too mate with only one partner for life. The male dove is known to be extremely caring of its partner.

    Related Reading: Do I Love Her? 30 Signs That Surely Say So!

    9. Maple leaf

    I have lost count of the number of movies where maple leaf is scattered and sometimes shown flying in the breezy air as a metaphorical and symbolic way of saying love is about to bloom between two people. The maple leaf has been linked with fertility and the joy of giving birth to a child.

    It is one of the most beautiful and widely used beautiful and true love symbols in Japan and China. Like the sweet sap from its tree, which essentially produces maple syrup, maple leaf is considered to bring the sweetness and wonders of love in one’s life.

    10. Infinity

    Let’s all thank The Fault In Our Stars for bringing infinity to our attention. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities, right? And how many of us have used the phrase “to infinity and beyond” without knowing what it means? The infinity symbol is one of the pleasing and artistic symbols of love which represents forever, endless and always kind of love.

    The symbol of infinity is associated with eternal love and everlasting commitment. Thanks to its elegant and beautiful design, it has become a trending choice for jewelry design and tattoos.

    11. Shell

    I always try to impress people on dates by saying my first name means heaven and my second name means seashell. And then I would go on to say that their experience of loving me would be nothing short of heavenly and precious. Now getting back one of the well-known love symbols, these shells were used to convey emotions.

    In Greek mythology, you will always see Aphrodite holding a seashell. As the hard casing of the shell protects the pearl, the lovers tend to be protective of each other. It signifies the protective nature of love.

    Related Reading: 13 Simple Ways To Win A Woman’s Heart

    12. Jasmine

    This beautiful white flower is very famous in the Hindu religion as a symbol of love. It is widely believed that the Jasmine flower comes from the foothills of the Himalayas, which is considered sacred ground in India. 

    Jasmine is one of the divine symbols of love, warmth, positivity and sensuality. There are many depictions of Hindu goddesses wearing Jasmine garlands around their necks. The white petals of the flower represent love, peace and purity.

    stories on falling in love and more

    13. Love knot

    Love knot or the lover’s knot is a recurring theme in jewelry designs. The symbolism behind it is that of binding. When you tie a knot, you are bound with them forever. It is a metaphor of a person’s commitment toward love. 

    That’s why when two people are getting married we say, “they are tying the knot”. It is one of the Celtic symbols of love. And also one of the important symbols of love in Hindu wedding rituals. Knots in themselves represent an unbreakable pledge.

    Related Reading: How Do You Know You Love Someone – 11 Signs That Say So

    14. Kokopelli

    The Kokopelli symbolizes healing, courtship, fertility, love, and music. Kokopelli is the fertility God of the Hopi tribe. Its symbol resembles an insect-like spirit. It’s a hunchbacked grasshopper playing a wooden flute.

    The Kokopelli plays a part in Hopi rituals by playing the love flute and attracting a maiden. This unique symbol for unconditional love is mostly seen in pottery, cave art, and folklore originating from a thousand years ago. 

    15. Rose quartz

    Crystals have been used in many cultures all over the world. Rose quartz is best known for being the stone of unconditional love. It is known to emit a strong vibration of love, joy, and emotional healing.

    It is also known as the Love Stone. Due to its relevance in Greek Mythology’s Aphrodite, it is to this date commonly referred to as an aphrodisiac. Some believe it has healing properties. If you are single and looking for love, then get rose quartz as it draws the love you seek. 

    16. Heart

    Do you know what’s one of the most frequently used emojis in my keypad? No surprise there. It’s the red heart. The most common and these days deemed as one of the most sincere symbols of love, the red heart is used everywhere, from text messages to cakes, and even clothing. 

    The heart symbol looks like two scallops on top with a V-shaped pointer at the bottom. Some say that the shape of the heart is a stylized portrayal of human anatomy. The curved shape of breasts, buttocks or female genitalia. Over time, its shape has remained intact. It’s the ultimate eternal symbol of love.

    Love and affection have been depicted in various ways and with many beautiful universal love symbols in different cultures. Love is complex and sometimes it gets messy. But let’s never twist how love is supposed to make us feel – secure, valued and revered. Love abundantly and love with every fiber of your being as that’s the only thing in the world that can bring a sense of calmness to your being. 

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