ReportWire

Category: Humor

Humor | ReportWire publishes the latest breaking U.S. and world news, trending topics and developing stories from around globe.

  • UAW Reaches Deal With GM

    UAW Reaches Deal With GM

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    General Motors and the United Auto Workers have struck a tentative deal, ending the union’s unprecedented six-week campaign of coordinated strikes that won record pay increases for workers at the Detroit Three automakers. What do you think?

    “​Great. I’ve been buying foreign cars for six​ straight weeks in solidarity.”

    Albert Houlihan, Turf Researcher

    Woman Who Had Abortion Shares How She Regrets Not Stopping For M&M McFlurry Afterwards

    “Hopefully they can find a way to automate these strikes so it’s less intense next time.”

    Dwight Gauthier, Unemployed

    “Surely there’s a better solution than paying fair wages.”

    Renee Jehle, Weapons Tester

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  • Tesla Cybertruck Torn To Pieces By Hose

    Tesla Cybertruck Torn To Pieces By Hose

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    HOLLISTER, CA—Its stainless steel panels immediately crumpling from the pressure of the stream of water, a Tesla Cybertruck was reportedly torn to pieces Friday after getting sprayed by a hose. As seen in the now-viral video shared across social media platforms, the 7,000-pound electric vehicle splintered into dozens of pieces under the onslaught of the $39.99 hose purchased from Lowe’s, each bead of water from the gardening implement puncturing holes in the truck’s body until the entire vehicle shuddered and collapsed into a pile of broken glass and shrapnel. In a statement, Tesla Motors CEO Elon Musk defended the build quality of the Cybertruck, blaming the damage on the hose being set to “jet” at the time of the incident. At press time, sources confirmed that the remaining, dripping-wet pieces of the vehicle pieces had burst into flames.

    This Elon Musk Deepfake Cannot Be Real

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  • Our Photo Is 1970’s Photography At Its Finest

    Our Photo Is 1970’s Photography At Its Finest

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    “This beaut of my uncle, aunt and cousins was proudly displayed in their home for years.”

    (submitted by Megan)

    The post Head Of The Family appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com.

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    Team Awkward

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  • A Game Of “Airplane” Gone Wrong

    A Game Of “Airplane” Gone Wrong

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    “My son. My sister. And a game of airplane gone wrong.”

    (submitted by Marina)

    The post Turbulence appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com.

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    Team Awkward

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  • Yep, We Were “That” Family On Vacation

    Yep, We Were “That” Family On Vacation

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    “Me, my mom, my dad, and my little brother at Disney World in 1985. I think we could be a close second to the Griswolds.”

    (submitted by Nickole)

    The post The Accidental Tourists appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com.

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    Team Awkward

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  • There’s a Monster Under My Bed, Can I Sleep In Your Room?

    There’s a Monster Under My Bed, Can I Sleep In Your Room?

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    Kids are so selfish, all they think about is themselves. Why have two victims when you can have just one? Dad can have many more children in future to replace this whiny little crybaby.

    The post There’s a Monster Under My Bed, Can I Sleep In Your Room? first appeared on Crazy Funny Pictures.

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    liver

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  • Always be a good friend!

    Always be a good friend!

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    Tags: funny, meme, humor

    4702 points, 273 comments.

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  • “Beer-a-FULL” memes for the weekend (43 Photos)

    “Beer-a-FULL” memes for the weekend (43 Photos)

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    Rick

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  • A tall glass of {{product.brand}}

    A tall glass of {{product.brand}}

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    Hungry

    Adam
     starts off your RSS feed with what might honestly be making the best of a bad situation.
    “I guess my pizza will be here next time I write a date bug?”


     

    Consumer
    Gordon S. reports
    “I was trying to clear up my subscription ending an issue
    early (but that’s a WTF for another day) and can’t get
    seem to get through to their chat. Looks like they got
    impatient waiting for their support to connect too. The
    message field is disabled, not that there’s anyone listening.”
    If you look closely you’ll see that they
    also managed to perform MY personal pet peeve: blithe use of the wrong timezone.

    cr

     

    Philosopher
    Daniel
     hypothesizes the reasoning behind this Tautological Error Message.
    “Why can’t you delete this disk? Because it’s
    attached to a VM! Which VM, you ask? That’s top secret.
    I can neither confirm nor deny its existence.”

    vm

     

    Facebooker
    Craig
     has been driven to drink by the ads, raising a toast to Mr. Walker.
    “I love a delicious glass of {{product.brand}}”

    fb

     

    Finally, a fail-merge from
    Manuel
     which undoubtedly went unnoticed because almost nobody
    actually pays attention to the archaic multipart/alternative anymore (except Manuel!).
    “I got this e-mail (upper one) today from my internet
    provider, where they asked me for feedback. I wasn’t sure
    whether they wanted feedback for their language skills,
    since the subject is Estonian and the body is English,
    or for their ability to send automated mails. Even more
    surprising, when I switched to view the message body as
    HTML instead of text (my default), it was suddenly
    Estonian, and also the content was different.”

    wtf

     

    [Advertisement]
    BuildMaster allows you to create a self-service release management platform that allows different teams to manage their applications. Explore how!

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    Lyle Seaman

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  • Marriage memes wouldn’t be complete without acknowledging the kids (28 Photos)

    Marriage memes wouldn’t be complete without acknowledging the kids (28 Photos)

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    Jacob

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  • All of them are CORNSTARS

    All of them are CORNSTARS

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    Tags: snow white, Cute, Random, Girl, awesome

    5433 points, 443 comments.

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  • World Series-Winning Rangers Owner Immediately Voids Entire Team’s Contracts

    World Series-Winning Rangers Owner Immediately Voids Entire Team’s Contracts

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    Read more…

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  • I’m Still Not Sure What The Wedding Photographer Was Thinking

    I’m Still Not Sure What The Wedding Photographer Was Thinking

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    “Not sure what our wedding photographer was thinking. 1989, My mom and dad hovering above the church (and they were alive at the time).”

    (submitted by IG @wolffjewels) 

    The post Hovering appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com.

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    Team Awkward

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  • Nothing Like Parenting In The 80’s

    Nothing Like Parenting In The 80’s

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    “From my boyfriend’s baby book. Nothing like parenting in the 80s.”

    (submitted by IG @nicolepuskas)

    The post PBR Baby appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com.

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    Team Awkward

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  • Let’s Take This To The Bedroom Meme #CoupleGoals

    Let’s Take This To The Bedroom Meme #CoupleGoals

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    I don’t believe he asked for consent before picking up that couch. Just made a demand like the white patriarchy always does! Too bad there’s no real women out there to take a stand against this misogyny like Caitlyn Jenner, Lily Wachowski or Hari Nef!

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    liver

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  • Cash Only: Take Your Cream Cheese Elsewhere

    Cash Only: Take Your Cream Cheese Elsewhere

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    These days many people are trying to pay for stuff with all kinds of weird currencies. It all started when Bitcoin became popular. After that thousands of weird shitcoins emerged. Now it’s getting even worse – some guys want to pay for things with cream cheese!

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    liver

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  • Mike Luckovich for Nov 02, 2023 – Mike Luckovich, Humor Times

    Mike Luckovich for Nov 02, 2023 – Mike Luckovich, Humor Times

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    Mike Luckovich of the Atlanta Constitution received two amazing honors in 2006, winning both a Pulitzer Prize and the Reuben award for Outstanding Cartoonist of the Year. This was the second Pulitzer for Luckovich; his first was awarded in 1995. He had previously received the Reuben award for Editorial Cartooning in 2001, but this was his first time to be named the overall outstanding cartoonist by a group of his peers. The Reuben awards are distributed each year by the National Cartoonists Society and are considered professional cartooning’s highest honor.

    Impressive as these achievements are, they are only the latest in a long line of awards for Luckovich. He was a runner-up for the Pulitzer in 1987 before garnering the 1995 win.  In 1989, he won the Overseas Press Club’s award for the “Best Cartoons on Foreign Affairs for 1989,” and in 1991, he was awarded the National Headliners award for editorial cartoonists. In 1994, a Luckovich cartoon was selected by voters in a Newsweek magazine poll as one of the four best editorial cartoons of the year.

    After freelancing and selling life insurance to make ends meet following his graduation from the University of Washington in 1982, Luckovich landed his first cartooning job at the Greenville News in South Carolina. After nine months at the News, Luckovich was hired by The Times-Picayune in New Orleans, where he stayed for four years before moving on to Atlanta.

    Luckovich’s cartoons, syndicated nationally by Creators Syndicate, appear in more than 350 daily publications, including The Washington Post,The San Diego Union-Tribune, The Denver Post, Newsday, New York Post, The Cleveland Plain-Dealer, The Dallas Morning News, the Boston Globe, the Seattle Times, the Los Angeles Times, the Chicago Tribune, the Nashville Tennessean and the Houston Chronicle, and are reprinted regularly in Time, Newsweek and the New York Times.

    Luckovich and his wife, Margo, have four children. His hobbies include exercising and collecting unique ties.

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    Mike Luckovich

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  • John Deering for Nov 02, 2023 – John Deering, Humor Times

    John Deering for Nov 02, 2023 – John Deering, Humor Times

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    John Deering is chief editorial cartoonist for the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, the state’s largest newspaper. Five times a week, his cartoon comments entertain (or sometimes enrage) readers throughout Arkansas, in Washington, D.C., and across the country.

    Winner of the National Press Foundation’s 1997 Berryman Award, Deering also gained top honors in the 1994 national John Fischetti Cartoon Competition and was the seven-time winner of the Arkansas Press Association’s Best Editorial Cartoonist award.

    Deering’s work is collected in two books: Deering’s State of Mind (1990) and We Knew Bill Clinton … Bill Clinton Was a Friend of Ours (1993, with Vic Harville). He is a 14-year member of the American Association of Editorial Cartoonists.

    Born in 1956 in Little Rock, Deering has been drawing since his childhood fascination with science fiction and dinosaurs — subjects he made into comic books. After studying art with Truman Alston, Deering focused on commercial and fine art at the University of Arkansas at Little Rock. Along the way, he found his strength in interlocking art with comment.

    At the Democrat-Gazette, Deering advanced from layout artist to editorial cartoonist in 1981-82. His promotion to chief editorial cartoonist in 1988 made his cartoons the state’s best-known. Deering also creates the comic panel Too Much Coffee.

    He and his wife, Kathy, have a daughter and two sons, and live in Little Rock. He still draws dinosaurs.

    Check out his comic strips, Zack Hill and Strange Brew.

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    John Deering

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  • Every Product Review Is Sponsored And No One Can Be Trusted, But We’ll Tell You Why The Hamilton Beach 6 Speed Mixer Sucks Ass

    Every Product Review Is Sponsored And No One Can Be Trusted, But We’ll Tell You Why The Hamilton Beach 6 Speed Mixer Sucks Ass

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  • Not My Domain

    Not My Domain

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    Dian found this code snippet.

    String[] key_value = url.split("\.");

for (int i=key_value.length; i>0; i--) {
        if (i > 1)
                domain = key_value[i-2]+"."+key_value[i-1];
        break;
}

    “I’m still not sure what this is supposed to do,” Dian writes.

    I believe this is someone’s attempt to extract the TLD and primary domain from a URL, e.g. www.mysite.com becomes mysite.com. (Remember when wwws were on every domain name?) Why they chose to use a loop that only executes once, I’ll never understand.

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    Remy Porter

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