Crisp manufacturer Joggers has announced that they are getting rid of 3,000 staff in the next few months.
CEO Mike Risphole told us, “We did the maths, and by offloading the staff, we’ll save ourselves £65m a year. This will enable us to add an extra crisp to our packets.”
Established in Leicester in 1948 and since relocating to Reading, Berkshire, the news of the staff sackings was released in tandem with a celebratory announcement.
“After 75 proud years, we’re delighted to announce that we have just finished our first sack of potatoes and will be opening the second on Saturday,” Mr Risphole crowed.
However, the news of an extra crisp may not be as good as it sounds. Joggers has told us that they have resigned Gary Lineker as their ‘Face Of Crisps’ for the next three years, at an eye-watering £18 million a year. To cover the cost, they will be reducing the number of crisps in a bag to four.
Joggers will start retailing the new bags at 40p, with the tagline, “That’s Only 10p Per Crisp!”
