ReportWire

Category: Humor

Humor | ReportWire publishes the latest breaking U.S. and world news, trending topics and developing stories from around globe.

  • Heath And Heather: Which One Is More Heatherish?

    Heath And Heather: Which One Is More Heatherish?


    Which of these lovely people is more Heatherish – Heath or Heather? Please let us know in the comments, because it actually is a competition. Heath is saying that it is not, because he’s just afraid to lose.

    The post Heath And Heather: Which One Is More Heatherish? first appeared on Crazy Funny Pictures.



    liver

    Source link

  • 50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They’re American

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They’re American

    For language geeks like me, accent reduction is a term used to describe losing a foreign or regional accent to adopt a more popular one (e.g., American). It’s an important part of a person’s identity, but sometimes pronunciation that’s hard to understand can lead to miscommunication in professional settings such as business and academia.

    In fact, many well-known actors use accent reduction to cast more movie roles. And sometimes even the most attentive film-watchers take them as born and bred United States citizens.

    So when redditor Jma7400 asked fellow users who were some actors they couldn’t believe weren’t from the US, over 4000 people shared their eye-opening discoveries. Some of them channel their inner American so well, they deserve all the spotlight.

    Without further ado, we invite you to scroll down and see these brilliant shapeshifters for yourself. While you’re at it, make sure to check out the conversations we had with voice and accent coaches Ashley Howard, Holly Renaut, and Sarah Valentine, who kindly agreed to let us in on the secret of how accent masking works.

    Gary Oldman

    In fact, he had to relearn his natural accent with a voice coach.

    I’d award him extra points for being such a great chameleon overall. There have been times that I had no idea it was him in a particular role.

    ginger_minge , IMDb Report

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American I’m always surprised. Idris Elba and Tom Holland come to mind.

    Hearing Christian Bale in Ford vs Ferrari and me wondering what the f**k is this man doing with a cartoon Brit accent. Then looking it up and many people insisting that’s close to his real accent.

    _Goose_ , IMDb Report

    Bored Panda reached out to voice coach Ashley Howard to learn more about what accent reduction is.

    Howard defined it as the process through which a person changes their accent towards another accent. It is also known as accent softening, accent modification, and accent neutralization.

    “In reality, accent reduction is more so a process of accent acquisition: you never lose the ability to speak the way you speak but instead learn another way of speaking, substituting the sounds and intonation patterns you use for other sounds and intonation patterns.”

    “If you only wanted to use the new sounds and intonation patterns, then after some time, the old neural pathways may become less familiar and easier to use, so the new sounds and intonation patterns would become the more dominant instinct. At this point, perhaps you could then say that you have reduced or even gotten rid of your old accent.”

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American I grew up with Hugh Jackman as Wolverine. I’d never heard him be anything else.

    Imagine my reaction when I first heard his native Australian accent lol

    Logical-Wasabi7402 , IMDb Report

    We also got in contact with a professional actor and dialect coach, Holly Renaut, who prefers not to use this term at all, as it implies that it’s possible to get to a point where one has no accent, and this is simply not attainable.

    “We all, regardless of language, have an accent. An accent is simply a particular way of pronouncing a language. You can have an accent that is, for example, more Spanish in its pronunciation, and you’d like to shift it towards sounding more American. This notion that some people have an accent while others do not is simply false.”

    “So, let’s tweak slightly and talk about accent shifting. Moving along the line from one accent to another. You could land anywhere on that line, with some features of one accent, some of another. We all have our own particular, unique, and beautiful way of speaking.”

    “Accent shifting is a complex but achievable process involving training your articulation muscles, reprogramming your brain to activate them in a different way than you may do habitually, working on your listening skills to distinguish between similar sounds, perhaps unfamiliar to you, noticing the rhythm, melody (intonation), and word stress patterns, and turning that all into something that, in an ideal world, happens without you thinking about it.”

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American Charlize Theron – a South African girl who deliberately developed an American accent and now can’t even pronounce her own surname properly anymore.

    Beeeeater , IMDb Report

    We were fortunate enough to receive another opinion from actors’ accent coach Sarah Valentine, who has worked with all kinds of people and thinks people shouldn’t hide this part of their identity in the first place.

    “I work with people from all over the world who want to sound more ‘American’ or more ‘British’ or just be understood, so they can be doctors, lawyers, dentists, telephone operators, anyone in business, professionals from all walks of life, basically anyone at all who just wants to ‘sound more professional’. But I do need to reiterate that because I have such a passion for accents and I love listening to them, I don’t feel the need for accent reduction. But I understand the need to teach people how to do it, and so that’s what I do. It’s simply a service I provide, although I personally don’t see it as necessary.”

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American Melanie Lynskey. I seriously couldn’t believe she was from New Zealand and went straight to YouTube to hear her original accent. She embodies her American characters so well, especially in I Don’t Feel at Home in This World Anymore

    daytimeinsomnia , IMDb Report

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American Karen Gillan

    She’s does a really good American accent. Even more impressive since she is Scottish

    travelingpug , IMDb Report

    The challenges these experts face vary from person to person. Howard finds that the most common ones are learning new sounds and intonations that a person has never made before. Or knowing when to apply the newly learned characteristics to the desired accent.

    What he also finds challenging is consciously applying the learning to spontaneous speech. “The way we approach this is to think about introducing the new features into low-stress and low-stakes conversations first. The other way we approach this is to consider their most common phrases in both personal and professional contexts, as well as names and technical terminology used at work that they can practice, so that when these come up, they are more likely to use the new pronunciation.”

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American I knew she wasn’t American, but Kate Winslet’s Bucks county accent in the Mare of Eastttown was on point. 

    klitchell , IMDb Report

    Renaut finds difficulties with mindsets that some individuals have adopted. “Some people feel that accents are a skill you either have or don’t. But they’re more like music. Some people have a different level of talent naturally than others, but anyone can learn with some time and effort.”

    “Other people hugely underestimate how much effort and practice can go into learning to shift to another accent. They tend to think it’s a matter of ‘listen and repeat’, but there’s much more to it. I work according to how the client responds best. Some are visual learners; some respond to audio and are great at imitating; and some need physical instructions and work with images… It’s about getting to know the individual and catering the training to them.”

    She also notices that “there are a lot of people who teach ‘accent reduction’ who charge a fortune and only approach things using phonetics. But learning the symbols for the sounds doesn’t always translate into your mouth being able to correctly make them. This leads to a lot of frustration, and people enter training with me already feeling like their goals are achievable.”

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American The character Carla Jean Moss in No Country For Old Men is played by Scottish actress Kelly MacDonald. 

    iploggged , IMDb Report

    Valentine shares that the challenging part of her job is that everyone hears differently, and being able to get sounds right is difficult. But, fortunately, she has found a way to work around it.

    “I make the learning fun, and whether you want to sound American or British, I am able to connect to my client and imagine how the interior of their mouth currently works, and I get them to switch it to their desired accent.”

    Her method of teaching isn’t really conventional, as she has created her own “Valentine method,” which still works on the basis of phonetics but is adjusted to the person she’s working with. “I am more visceral in the respect that I work with the person and understand them so that we together can create the exact perfect sound and accent that the person wants.”

    Renaut was also kind enough to provide some advice for people who would like to reduce their accent. “Firstly, observe your own speech. Talk to yourself in the mirror and notice what moves, what shapes your lips make, how open your mouth is, and how tense or relaxed your muscles are, etc. Record yourself and listen (I know we all hate the sound of our own voice, but this is crucial!). Notice the ups and downs, how fast you are, and whether you pronounce things clearly or rush through them.”

    “Watch others speak without the sound on. When babies learn to talk, they look at people’s mouths; that’s why the first sounds they make are ones we can see (M, B, D). Start to imitate the movements you see rather than simply trying to make the sounds.

    “Listen to speakers that have this accent. BUT don’t listen to the words. The first thing to listen for are the sounds they make when they are thinking (called the hesitance sound). These “ums and ahs” will show you what the “home position” of the mouth is. If you learn to relax your mouth into that position, it’ll help a lot. Listen to the intonation. Do they go up at the end of the line? Do you hear a large or small range in the voice and its ups and downs?”

    “While you’re at it, write down a few words you connect with the accent or find particularly fun to say. For example, if you want to sound British, maybe ‘darling’ is one of your words.”

    Heath Ledger in Lords of Dogtown had such an authentic Southern California surfer accent, like so specific and niche, that to this day I’m still surprised he was Australian. Rip.

    capocutolo Report

    In addition, Valentine recommends watching television shows you want to learn the accent from, getting a VPN, listening to local radio, going online, and searching for specific things on YouTube that allow you to listen to people from the local area.

    “Something that I do when I’m researching roles is that if a character comes from a specific place in the world, I will call the local library and tune in to their local radio. I also created a website called Accent Bank, which allows people from around the world to send me their real accents, which I then upload onto it.”

    If you’re interested in accents, it’s an excellent opportunity to listen to some of them and perhaps contribute one of your own! All you need to do is download a little three-minute script and read it.

    I would have said Gary Oldman, but then nothing about Gary Oldman surprises me anymore.

    Idris Elba in the Wire had an extremely good accent

    maninblueshirt Report

    Renaut concludes by saying, “I believe all accents are beautiful. The goal for me, particularly for people looking for “accent reduction,” is to first re-frame the goal. Most people are happy to retain some of their “original” accents. It’s part of who they are. Their identity.”

    “Shifting 100% into another accent can feel like a loss or a rejection of part of what makes us who we are. If we can be easily understood and feel confident, that is good enough. I don’t want to live in a world in which everyone wants to sound the same. We all love listening to accents. We should approach them playfully. Won’t it be a shame to lose them?”

    She also has a very successful program online called The Accent Challenge. An affordable, extremely effective program for actors of all language backgrounds. It’s a lot of fun!

    50 Non-American Actors Who Mastered The Accent So Well, People Had No Doubts They're American Andrew Lincoln (TWD)/ Lauren Cohan (TWD)/Hugh Laurie (House)/Rose McIver (Ghosts US)/Melanie Lynskey (Yellowjackets)

    __BipolarExpress__ , IMDb Report

    Jason Clarke has played so many Americans in film that I didn’t know he’s an Aussie

    matchesmalone1 Report

    I’m sure many will disagree but I think Nicole Kidman has a very good American accent.

    rb577511 Report

    Juno Temple from the new season of Fargo (who I believe is English with a cockney/estuary accent). Insanely good Midwestern accent without overdoing it.

    fulthrottlejazzhands Report

    Linus Roache from Law & Order, although I feel like I should have known he was English just from his name.

    seriouslaser Report

    Andrew Lincoln. Except it was the other way. Knew him from Love Actually. So seeing him in The Walking Dead was shocking.

    Same with having grown up with Boondock Saints. My dumb self still somehow believed Darryl actor was actually Irish …. sigh

    JAlfredJR Report

    I will give you two.

    Rose McIver from US Ghosts.

    Jacob Anderson – Louis de Pointe du Lac in Anne Rice’s Interview with the Vampire. Formerly Grey Worm in Game of Thrones.

    I lost my s**t the first time I heard them in an interview. Shocked. No clue.

    types-like-thunder Report

    The guy that played Apollo in the Battlestar Galactica reboot – Jamie something I think – I don’t feel like googling his last name but the first time I watched an interview with him I didn’t hear a single word he said I was so flabbergasted at his accent and how well he hid it in the show. I’m surprised I’m haven’t seen him in more stuff, he was pretty good. Maybe he just doesn’t do the type of stuff I watch.

    frogperspectives Report

    [ad_2] Rugilė Žemaitytė
    Source link

  • Colorado Pastor Claims The Lord Told Him To Defraud Investors In Crypto Scheme

    Colorado Pastor Claims The Lord Told Him To Defraud Investors In Crypto Scheme


    Eligio Regalado, a pastor from Denver, CO and his wife, Kaitlyn Regalado, were charged with a civil complaint that the pair created and sold a valueless cryptocurrency called “INDXcoin,” raising nearly $3.2 million that they used to fund a lavish lifestyle in a scheme that Mr. Regaldo claimed he was called to do by God, telling his investors that “God is going to work a miracle in the financial sector.” What do you think?

    “And he just took God’s word for it? Idiot.”

    Art Abadi, Disclaimer Proofreader

    “God better find a good lawyer.”

    Christina Zwegat, Bowling Journalist

    “I mean, God does have a track record of asking for some weird stuff.”

    Joseph Taupin, Systems Analyst



    Source link

  • Working at UPS: The Perfect Job Opportunity For You

    Working at UPS: The Perfect Job Opportunity For You

    What is it like working at UPS as a package handler? It’s actually a lot of fun. You can knock on people’s doors and run away before they could answer. Just like you did when you were a kid.

    The post Working at UPS: The Perfect Job Opportunity For You first appeared on Crazy Funny Pictures.

    liver

    Source link

  • Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    During a recent interview, Republican presidential candidate Nikki Haley said that America had “never been a racist country.” The Onion asked Americans why our history has always been color-blind, and this is what they said.

    Harold Lucas, Retired

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “If we’re so racist, you’d think someone would’ve committed a racist act by now.”

    Ashley Moreno, Chef

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “Thomas Jefferson wrote that ‘all men are created equal’ and never did anything else as far as I know.”

    Bridget Tate, Homemaker

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “Show me one book that says otherwise. Or several. In list form, please. No particular reason.”

    Paul Gruber, Warehouse Manager

    Paul Gruber, Warehouse Manager

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “America is not a racist country, but a federation of racist states.”

    Bianca Mir, Truck Driver

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “Have you ever met a slave? Didn’t think so.”

    Teddy Bryant, Lifeguard

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “I’ve never faced any discrimination for being 3% Cherokee.”

    Marty Gilman, Sales Associate

    Marty Gilman, Sales Associate

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “This so-called racist nation is the same one that gave Black Americans their own exclusive water fountains.”

    Patricia Wayne, Personal Chef

    Patricia Wayne, Personal Chef

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “Why else would Martin Luther King so eloquently say that racism was a fiction and we should get on with our lives?”

    Lily Rhodes, Bank Teller

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “I think this 90-second PragerU cartoon can explain the concept better than me or anyone else.”

    Susan Combs, Teacher

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “How many times do I have to cite very selective lines from the Constitution before people understand this?”

    Charles Hampton, Park Ranger

    Charles Hampton, Park Ranger

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “America has always been a land of opportunity for all different types of land-owning white men.”

    Angelo Townsend, Barista

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “Does the United States discriminate against non-white people? Sure. But is it racist? Nah, probably not.”

    Rory Bond, Optician

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “It’s not racism when it’s accidental, which is what slavery, Jim Crow, and every modern hate crime are.”

    Rachel O’Hara, Bartender

    Rachel O’Hara, Bartender

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “All egalitarian societies begin with mass genocide.”

    Rod Richards, Pilot

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “My great-grandfather loved his slaves.”

    Bianca Underwood, Meteorologist

    Bianca Underwood, Meteorologist

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “Most of our mass shooters target very diverse crowds of innocent people.”

    Sarah Fowler, Travel Agent

    Sarah Fowler, Travel Agent

    Image for article titled Americans Explain Why The U.S. Has Never Been A Racist Country

    “We gave them jobs, didn’t we?”

    You’ve Made It This Far…

    You’ve Made It This Far…

    Source link

  • Inappropriate AI-Generated Pics Of Taylor Swift Spread Online As Singer Deals With Stalker Problem

    Inappropriate AI-Generated Pics Of Taylor Swift Spread Online As Singer Deals With Stalker Problem

    Taylor Swift has been sexualized against her wishes as a result of AI-generated explicit images, sparking backlash and debates about the ethics of artificial intelligence.

    The songstress’ fake nudes have made rounds on social media since Thursday (January 25). The perverted AI-generated pictures put Taylor in comprising poses, mostly naked, attending a Kansas City Chiefs American football game.

    X (formerly known as Twitter) has seemingly suspended at least one account associated with the offensive images, Fox News reported. Bored Panda has seen the doctored photos but is not sharing them.

    Taylor Swift was sexualized against her wishes as a result of AI-generated explicit images, sparking backlash and debates about the ethics of artificial intelligence

    Image credits: Marcelo Endelli/Getty Images

    As a result, Swifties and empathizing people have shared their outrage online, with a person writing on X: “‘Taylor Swift is a billionaire she’ll be fine’ THAT DOESN’T MEAN U CAN GO AROUND POSTING SEXUAL AI PICS OF HER LIKE A FREAK SHE’S STILL HUMAN BEING WITH FEELINGS.”

    Another X user commented: “Those Taylor AI pics are straight-up sexual harassment, and it’s disgusting that man can do those things without repercussions.” 

    An additional commenter penned: “They see women as objects made for their sick fantasies, and I’m so sick of it. It makes me want to throw up. PROTECT TAYLOR SWIFT.”

    A separate individual chimed in: “If you think sexualized, non-consensual AI generated photos of Taylor Swift being spread online isn’t an issue, I want you to think what that means for countless women and children who aren’t Taylor Swift who’ve also been subjected to digital rape and AI porn.”

    The perverted AI-generated pictures put Taylor in comprising poses, mostly naked, attending a Kansas City Chiefs American football game

    Image credits: Taylor Swift

    “Protect Taylor Swift” has since been trending on X, with people continuously denouncing the flood of disgraceful AI photos and pointing out that the 34-year-old music star has been victimized. According to TMZ, Taylor herself hasn’t addressed this yet. 

    The effort among the Cruel Summer hitmaker’s fans ultimately paid off, resulting in the suspension of the main problematic account. 

    However, the removal only came after the debauched user’s post racked up more than 22 million views. The post had also been bookmarked by users on X more than 71,000 times, Daily Dot reported.

    Despite the initial removal, X has seemingly done little to delete other posts containing the imagery. According to the Daily Dot, the explicit deep fake has remained visible on some accounts for upwards of six hours and continued to garner tens of thousands of views. 

    A source close to the singer told The Daily Mail that “these fake AI-generated images are abusive, offensive, exploitative, and done without Taylor’s consent and/or knowledge.” 

    They reportedly added that whether or not the American singer-songwriter will take legal action is still being decided. The source further stated: “It is shocking that the social media platform even let [the images] be up to begin with. 

    “These images must be removed from everywhere they exist and should not be promoted by anyone. 

    “Taylor’s circle of family and friends are furious, as are her fans, obviously. They have the right to be, and every woman should be. 

    “The door needs to be shut on this. Legislation needs to be passed to prevent this, and laws must be enacted.”

    Whether or not the American singer-songwriter will take legal action is still being decided

    Image credits: Taylor Swift

    X users have also directed their vitriol toward those who re-shared the images on social media after they first appeared on adult websites earlier this month, Page Six reported.

    A user who seemingly shared the altered images wrote: “My Taylor post went viral, and now everyone is posting it.” He later added, “Bro, what have I done… They might pass new laws because of my Taylor Swift post. 

    “If Netflix did a documentary about AI pics, they’d put me in it as a villain. It’s never been so over.” As per Page Six, the troll’s account has since been made private.

    Synthetic media expert Sam Gregory explained that the issue, whether AI-generated images or deep-fake videos, highlights the ever-growing problem related to AI-generated, non-consensual images of a sexual nature.

    He told the Daily Dot: “Taylor Swift is being targeted now, but many prominent women celebrities and many private citizens, including multiple [recent] cases with teenage girls from New Jersey to Brazil to Spain, have been targeted with deepfakes.

    “It is not only extremely easy with advances in generative AI to generate nude images or ‘nudify’ an individual using available tools or open-source options. 

    “But it’s also a huge problem that it’s very easy to find these images.”

    The AI scandal comes just days after Taylor’s stalker, David Crowe, was arrested three times in the last week outside the singer’s Tribeca neighborhood home in New York, USA. 

    As per Fox News, David was charged with stalking in the fourth degree, along with harassment in the first and second degree. An assistant district attorney for Manhattan said in court that the man had been “asked to leave [Swift’s home] over 10 times.”

    The AI scandal comes just days after Taylor’s stalker, David Crowe, was arrested three times in the last week

    Image credits: Gotham/Getty Images

    According to a criminal complaint, David was seen at Taylor’s home “approximately 30 times” between November 25, 2023, and January 22, 2024, despite her having a restraining order against him. He was subsequently given supervised release after his arraignment on January 24, as requested by the Manhattan District Attorney’s Office. 

    Nevertheless, David reportedly appeared outside the musician’s home shortly after leaving court. The NYPD told Fox News: “Officers responded to a 911 call for a disorderly male in the vicinity of Franklin Street and Hudson Street, which is in the First precinct.

    “On arrival, a male left the location and walked into the First Precinct, where he was subsequently taken into custody without further incident. He was charged with four counts of criminal contempt.” David currently remains in custody.

    Taylor’s recent series of unfortunate events have highlighted not only worries for the popstar’s security but also system vulnerabilities for abuse victims. Jenna Chapman-AU, a worker at the Harlem-based anti-domestic violence group WARM, told CBS News: “It makes it so much scarier for the rest of us.

    “I don’t have Taylor Swift’s bodyguards, neither do the countless women and survivors who come to our centers.”

    Jenna further stated: “ Those restraining orders are useful, and they are helpful in protecting the people who [get] them.

    “But [we] see that in so many other instances, they fail to protect people as deeply as they should.”

    Many people agreed that sharing these AI-generated images was “sick” and “disgusting”

    ADVERTISEMENT

    [ad_2] Donata Leskauskaite
    Source link

  • Ride Ride Ride

    Ride Ride Ride

    File under "Old Business": Swissrail just can't catch a break.

    Diligent
    Richard B.
    dug into the news and reports
    "After following the link from this week's Error'd, I came
    across this interesting description in Swissrail's Member list.
    The filename means 'Company description En(glish)'.
    They have the same thing in French; the German description is normal."


     

    Allie C.
    didn't order this.
    "Sorting by views descending works perfectly with no issues
    at all!" I don't think we found a catchy name for this
    category yet. I'm leaning towards assortment.

    sort

     

    Persistent
    Peter G.
    grumbles
    "This building company claims to have been in the business for a long time.
    By their testimonials I'd say at least two thousand years."

    latin

     

    Faithful
    Adam R.
    comments
    "Comcast is having an outage in my area, and this time they're not even
    giving me a bad guess for the Estimated Time of Recovery."

    comcast

     

    Finally, conscientious
    Carly G.
    discovered a very disappointing windfall.
    "Cashfoward Bonus® would be more accurate. I wonder what happens if I spend it." Don't give it to me!

    discover

     

    [Advertisement]
    Continuously monitor your servers for configuration changes, and report when there's configuration drift. Get started with Otter today!

    Lyle Seaman

    Source link

  • Most toxic and insufferable fanbases in existence (20 GIFs)

    Most toxic and insufferable fanbases in existence (20 GIFs)

    Before we jump in here, these aren’t just tiny groups of people. These are entire fanbases who have a cult-like, mob mentality about something as trivial as Pokemon relationships. These are the stans that need to take a step back, go outside, and touch some grass.

    Enjoy the worst of the worst!

    Zach Nading

    Source link

  • glorious runtime paced

    glorious runtime paced

    While she grew up wanting to live among animals, she was actually approached to study the chimpanzees by Louis Leakey, an anthropologist whos research she was helping. Until Jane Goodall’s research, chimps were believed to be passive vegetarians and that only humans used tools.

    Source link

  • Jesus Christ Meme: Nice Try, But Not Nice Enough

    Jesus Christ Meme: Nice Try, But Not Nice Enough


    Even Jesus is sick of freeloaders. Want to get better and improve your health? Healthcare is about consumer choice. Get a job and enroll in a market-based plan.

    The post Jesus Christ Meme: Nice Try, But Not Nice Enough first appeared on Crazy Funny Pictures.



    liver

    Source link

  • Control Tree

    Control Tree

    User interfaces tend to map fairly naturally to trees as a data structure. In the modern world where we’ve forgotten how to make native UIs and do everything as web applications pretending to be native, the “tree” model is explicit via the DOM. But even in native UIs, we tend to group controls into containers and panels and tabs.

    Now, there may be cases where we need to traverse the tree, and trees present us with a very natural way to traverse them- recursion. To search the tree, first search the subtree. Recursion can have its own problems, but the UI tree of a native application is rarely deep enough for those problems to be an issue.

    Nick inherited some VB .Net code that iterates across all the controls in the screen. It does not use recursion, which isn’t a problem in and of itself. Every other choice in the code is the problem.

    For Each x In Me.Controls
        Select Case (x.GetType.ToString)
            Case "System.Windows.Forms.Panel"
                For Each y In x.Controls
                    Select Case (y.GetType.ToString)
                        Case "System.Windows.Forms.TabControl"
                            For Each z In y.Controls
                                Select Case (z.GetType.ToString)
                                    Case "System.Windows.Forms.TabPage"
                                        For Each w In z.Controls
                                            If w.Tag = "Store Info" Then
                                                strName = CheckForExceptions(w.Name)
                                                iIndexStoreInfoValues = (arrStoreInfoValues.Length - 1)
                                                If w.GetType().ToString() = "System.Windows.Forms.CheckBox" Then
                                                    arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues) = CType(w, CheckBox).CheckState
                                                Else
                                                    arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues) = w.Text
                                                End If
                                                ReDim Preserve arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues + 1)
                                            End If
                                        Next
                                End Select
                            Next
                        Case "System.Windows.Forms.GroupBox"
                            For Each z In y.Controls
                                If z.Tag = "Store Info" Then
                                    iIndexStoreInfoValues = (arrStoreInfoValues.Length - 1)
                                    arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues) = z.Text
                                    ReDim Preserve arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues + 1)
                                End If
                            Next
                        Case Else
                            If y.Tag = "Store Info" Then
                                iIndexStoreInfoValues = (arrStoreInfoValues.Length - 1)
                                strName = CheckForExceptions(y.Name)
                                arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues) = y.Text
                                ReDim Preserve arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues + 1)
                            End If
                    End Select
                Next
            Case Else 
                For Each y In x.Controls
                    If y.Tag = "Store Info" Then
                        iIndexStoreInfoValues = (arrStoreInfoValues.Length - 1)
                        arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues) = y.Text
                        ReDim Preserve arrStoreInfoValues(iIndexStoreInfoValues + 1)
                    End If
                Next
         End Select
    Next
    

    At its deepest, this particular pile of code has 12 levels of indenting. Which I’ve cleaned up a bit here- as submitted, the code was using 8 spaces per tab stop, which made it entirely unreadable in a window of reasonable width. Not that it’d be readable at any width, mind you.

    I’m not going to go line by line through this code. It’s not worth the psychic damage I’d inflict upon you. But I do want to call out a few highlights.

    Note the repeated uses of ReDim Preserve arrStoreInfoValues.... This is an ugly VB hack for pretending to have arrays that can grow- ReDim creates an entirely new array, at the new size, and Preserve ensures that all the data in the original array gets copied over to the new array. It’s expensive and time consuming, and .NET has plenty of built-in data structures that make this unnecessary. Likely, this was inherited from some VB6 code that got ported over to .NET. It was a weirdly common convention in VB6, instead of using any sort of data structure that can grow.

    In a few cases, we use a Select with only one branch to it- making it a fancy If statement but less readable. Now, there’s a good logic to this, I suppose, in that you may want more branches at some point, but I still hate reading it. Even worse, those switch statements are switching on the string representation of the type of the control. That particular code stench is always a “fun” thing to see, and it hints at an easy way to clean up this code: refactor those branches into methods, and use function overloading and the type system to replace the switches- if that were even necessary, as many of the branches do basically the same thing anyway.

    But there’s no real point to cleaning up this code, because as Nick discovered: it didn’t actually work. The assumptions the code makes about how the controls are organized are false assumptions. It misses loads of controls in its traversal.

    Nick replaced it with a 10 line recursive function that never needs to check the GetType of any of the controls.

    [Advertisement]
    BuildMaster allows you to create a self-service release management platform that allows different teams to manage their applications. Explore how!

    Remy Porter

    Source link

  • Paddington Bear Photoshopped Into Iconic Movie Scenes

    Paddington Bear Photoshopped Into Iconic Movie Scenes

    X user (formerly known as Twitter, before Elon ruined it) @Jaythechou photoshops Paddington into movie scenes, and has been doing it every day for 1050 days, at the time of writing. Some are beautifully subtle, others are larger than life, but all are skilfully done and a lot of fun. We recommend you check out his work for yourself, but in the meantime, here is a Top 30, as voted by us. In no particular order.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    Paddington Bear inserted into iconic movie scenes.

    liver

    Source link

  • Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    No matter how vacuous and empty a man’s brain is, his life partner should always be dumber. The Onion asked men why they prefer low-IQ wives, and this is what they said.

    Daniel Barnes, Historian

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “Whatever the reason, my preference is in no way a reflection of my own insecurities as a man.”

    Isaiah Valdez, Gravedigger

    Isaiah Valdez, Gravedigger

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “I’m a simple guy. I just want a nice, traditional woman I can easily manipulate.”

    Jack Thompson, Welder

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “It makes it easier to explain to them why I have so many other wives.”

    Frank Alonzo, Optician

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “I’m the dumbest person at work, and I’m sure as hell not coming home to being the dumbest person there too.”

    Todd Polk, Construction Worker

    Todd Polk, Construction Worker

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “A woman who can think for herself is always less than a month from breaking up with me.”

    Randall Judd, Microbiologist

    Randall Judd, Microbiologist

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “It would feel good to win at Connect Four for once.”

    Mack Bowers, Economist

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “I feel more secure in a relationship when I prevail at sorting objects by shape and even color.”

    Brian Pearlman, Chef

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “It’s a lot easier to cheat on someone when you can just distract them by ringing a small bell.”

    Doug Vreeland, Mechanic

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “A marriage between equals has the best chance to succeed.”

    Eric Deming, Delivery Driver

    Eric Deming, Delivery Driver

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “They’re easier to steal money from.”

    Howard Sahlman, Building Inspector

    Howard Sahlman, Building Inspector

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “Even though IQ is an arbitrary rubric, it’s good to have a number to throw in their faces when they disagree with you.”

    Kyle Hotchkiss, Musician

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “I prefer a cool, low-maintenance woman who’s happy just being locked in a barn with some lettuce after sex.”

    Jon Robinson, Psychologist

    Jon Robinson, Psychologist

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “There’s nothing more endearing to me in a partner than someone who repeatedly steps on rakes that pop up and hit them in face.”

    Brandon Kirk, Contractor

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “What can I say? I want dumb kids.”

    Randy Mireaux, Veterinarian

    Randy Mireaux, Veterinarian

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “My last sex doll got really arrogant and bitchy after it received its master’s, so I’m not dealing with that again.”

    Tristan Morrow, Doctor

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “I refuse to budge from my belief that Chester A. Arthur is the current U.S. president, and I won’t let anyone tell me otherwise.”

    Eric Landry, Parts Specialist

    Eric Landry, Parts Specialist

    Image for article titled Men Explain Why They Prefer Low-IQ Wives

    “It sounds like eugenics, so I’m on board.”

    You’ve Made It This Far…

    You’ve Made It This Far…

    Source link

  • 67 Hypocritical Bosses Who Cry “Nobody Wants To Work Anymore” While Mistreating Their Employees (New Pics)

    67 Hypocritical Bosses Who Cry “Nobody Wants To Work Anymore” While Mistreating Their Employees (New Pics)

    During the Great Resignation, when millions of people left the workforce, the phrase “Nobody wants to work anymore” became a common sentiment among HR and business leaders who were having trouble with hiring.

    However, as University of Calgary professor and researcher Paul Fairie pointed out referencing newspapers and other publications, these words have been thrown around every decade for at least the past century — going as far back as 1894.

    So in an attempt to remind everyone that change starts from within, we went digging through the ‘Antiwork‘ subreddit and put together a list of posts about hypocritical bosses who should take a good look in the mirror before blaming the common folk for being lazy.

    [ad_2] Ilona Baliūnaitė
    Source link

  • Replacing a City

    Replacing a City


    Mateus inherited some code where half the variables were named things like strAux1 and strAux2. It was a data driven application, and the data had some conventions that weren’t always ideal; for example, every city also had an associated abbreviation stored in its name field, e.g., “SAO PAULO (SP)” and “RIO DE JANEIRO (RJ)”.

    The original developers wanted to be able to present the names of cities without the abbreviation, so they wrote this:

    RTRIM(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(
    REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(
    REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(
    REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(REPLACE(
    REPLACE(REPLACE(UPPER(ISNULL(C.CITY,'')),'(RS)',''),
    '(SC)',''),'(PR)',''),'(SP)',''),'(MG)',''),'(RJ)',''),
    '(DF)',''),'(ES)',''),'(MS)',''),'(MT)',''),'(BA)',''),
    '(PI)',''),'(AL)',''),'(TO)',''),'(PE)',''),'(PA)',''),
    '(CE)',''),'(RN)',''),'(MA)',''),'(AP)',''),'(RR)',''),
    '(RN)',''),'(AM)',''),'(AC)',''),'(XX)',''),'(EX)',''),
    '(SE)',''),'(PB)',''),'(GO)',''),'(RO)',''))
    

    Whitespace added for readability(?).

    The good news is that I don’t think Brazil is going to be adding any major cities deserving of their own abbreviation any time soon. But by effectively hard-coding the list of viable abbreviations instead of using more advanced string splitting (or *gasp* a regex), or y’know actually normalizing the data correctly, they’ve done a nice job making the code harder to maintain.

    REPLACE REPLACE REPLACE REPLACE this code.

    [Advertisement]
    ProGet’s got you covered with security and access controls on your NuGet feeds. Learn more.



    Remy Porter

    Source link