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Tag: recreation

  • Morgan Wallan Arrested For Throwing Chair Off 6-Story Bar

    Morgan Wallan Arrested For Throwing Chair Off 6-Story Bar

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    Country music singer Morgan Wallen was arrested after throwing a chair off the roof of a newly six-story bar in downtown Nashville, with the chair landing three feet from police officers. What do you think?

    “You’re telling me they’ve been allowed to arrest white men this whole time?”

    Diego Gardner, Vibe Supervisor

    “Great scientists are always persecuted in their own time.”

    Ian Salazar, Aspiring Doorman

    “We should count ourselves lucky nobody got killed by those police officers.”

    Regina Friedman, Gravel Tycoon

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  • Worst Side Effects Ozempic Users Don’t Want You To Know About

    Worst Side Effects Ozempic Users Don’t Want You To Know About

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    While diarrhea is listed as a common side effect, none of the literature tells you that you will experience horrific visions of future wars, famines, and natural disasters every time you have a bowel movement—and worst of all, no one will believe you.

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  • Dripping Food Strategically Held Over Other Food

    Dripping Food Strategically Held Over Other Food

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    NAPERVILLE, IL—Working quickly and efficiently after the roast beef sandwich he’d been eating unexpectedly began to leak juices from the back, local man Dave Brauer reportedly rushed to strategically hold his dripping food over other food Thursday. “Oh shit, that’s not good,” said Brauer, who, with a mouth full of bread, beef, and various sauces, sprung into action and ensured that not a single drop of delicious sauce, fat, or meat juice fell on a piece of his plate that did not hold a starchy, fried, or dippable side. “Dammit. This soft bread can’t stand up to all these liquids. That’s okay. I’ll just mop it up with my fries. Oh, yeah. That’s good.” At press time, sources confirmed Brauer was despondent after he’d leaned in to take a big bite of his sandwich, only for it to collapse in his hands and cause a large pile of meat to fall directly into his lap.

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  • Bruno Mars Reportedly In $50 Million Of Debt With MGM Casino After Assuming Cocktails Were Complimentary

    Bruno Mars Reportedly In $50 Million Of Debt With MGM Casino After Assuming Cocktails Were Complimentary

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    LAS VEGAS—Now in the eighth year of his long-term residency at the resort, pop star Bruno Mars reportedly owes the Park MGM $50 million after having assumed since 2016 that the casino cocktails were complimentary. “They’re supposed to be free, right—at least while you’re gambling?” asked the “Uptown Funk” singer, claiming that bar staff across the Las Vegas hotel’s casino, restaurants, and poolside bars never mentioned a tab when offering him another round of drinks, nor did they ever ask for his room number. “I don’t even remember putting a credit card down. They always just said, ‘Very well, Mr. Mars,’ and brought another tray of drinks over. What a scam! If I’d known they were charging me, I would have stuck to the cheap stuff. I’m definitely going to need them to show me an itemized bill for everything before I check out.” Mars later confirmed that where the Park MGM really got him was with the mini bar’s $12 bags of macadamia nuts, which he had been eating continuously for almost a decade.

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  • Layover That Would Save $39 Requires Spending 7 Months Living In Iowa City Suburb

    Layover That Would Save $39 Requires Spending 7 Months Living In Iowa City Suburb

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    NEW YORK—While weighing the pros and cons of the flight as he planned his trip to visit family on the West Coast, local man Brett Danielewski, 32, reportedly expressed conflicting feelings Tuesday about a layover that would save him $39 but also require spending 7 months living in an Iowa City, IA suburb. “On the one hand, this could net me 40 bucks, which is, like, a whole dinner out, but then again, it does sound like a hassle spending five-thousand hours just puttering around outside Iowa City,” said Danielewski, who also expressed some trepidation after seeing that the flight’s fine print strongly implied he would need to settle down, marry, and start a family during that period in a nearby town such as Morse or Oxford. “If I have a book with me, it’ll probably pass pretty fast. And we’re talking about five and a half dollars in my pocket for every month I’m there. Man, that’s definitely tempting. But is it enough time to make my connecting flight?” At press time, Danielewski had opted for a slightly more expensive option that would allow him to simply spend a whole month living at the Cleveland-Hopkins International Airport.

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  • Paul Giamatti’s Lazy Eye Drunkenly Watching Oscars From Corner Of Dive Bar

    Paul Giamatti’s Lazy Eye Drunkenly Watching Oscars From Corner Of Dive Bar

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    NEW YORK—Hunched over a pint of beer, Paul Giamatti’s fake lazy eye from The Holdovers was reportedly drunkenly watching the Oscars broadcast from a corner of the dive bar, sources confirmed Sunday. “Turn it up, turn it up, I can’t hear!” said the prosthetic eyeball, which slurred its words as it tried to tell everyone in the vicinity that it had been invited to the 2024 Academy Awards ceremony, but had chosen to eschew it because everyone was “uptight.” “You guys saw it right? You saw me in The Holdovers? Giamatti’s not going to win. He doesn’t stand a chance. Alexander Payne, he’s the director, he told me I should have been the nominee, but his hands were tied. That’s fine by me. I don’t like the spotlight anyway. I’d rather be here.” At press time, the eyeball was boasting that it was up to be Quasimodo’s eye in the Disney live-action remake of The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

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  • New visitor center at Washington Crossing State Park in New Jersey will overlook Delaware River

    New visitor center at Washington Crossing State Park in New Jersey will overlook Delaware River

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    A new visitor center planned at New Jersey’s Washington Crossing State Park will include “commanding views” of the Delaware River at the site where the Revolutionary War took a pivotal turn.

    The visitor center is expected to be completed in time for the nation’s 250th anniversary in 2026, according to the New Jersey Department of Environmental Protection. Preparation work is starting this month. 

    The visitor center will feature a unique, curved design with a green roof and a series of trails surrounding the building. Inside, a multipurpose theater will have immersive exhibits that celebrate Gen. George Washington and his troops crossing the icy river into New Jersey on Christmas in 1776. The next morning, the Continental Army marched nine miles south to Trenton and waged a surprise attack on a garrison held by Hession mercenaries. British forces had largely remained in New York for the winter, leaving an opening for Washington’s army to score a strategic victory that restored morale and helped alter the course of the war in the Americans’ favor. 

    Washington Crossing State Park spans about 3,500 acres in Mercer and Hunterdon counties along the Delaware River, with most of the park’s amenities situated near the riverfront in Titusville. Before the war, the site of the crossing had been used for commercial and passenger ferries between Pennsylvania and New Jersey. 

    The park was established in 1912 and later expanded with roads, trails and picnic groves during the Great Depression. It now includes a nature preserve, an open-air theater and a number of historic structures, including the Johnson Ferry House and surrounding tract where Washington’s troops took shelter after crossing the river. The park’s Swan Collection, held at the existing visitor center, holds more than 600 artifacts from the Revolutionary War era.

    The visitor center is expected to cost $14 million, the Inquirer reported.

    It is being funded with corporate business tax revenue through the Preserve New Jersey Act. Additional support will be provided by Gov. Phil Murphy with funds from the American Rescue Plan. The visitor center was designed by New York-based Ikon 5 Architects, whose work received a national award from the Society of American Registered Architects.

    Beginning in late February (2024), work will begin in preparation for construction of the new Washington Crossing State…

    Posted by New Jersey State Parks, Forests & Historic Sites on Wednesday, February 14, 2024

    The initial phase of the project involves removing trees from the visitor center site. By law, the state will offset the tree removal with plantings in other areas of the park. Events marking the United States Semiquincentennial will begin later this year and continue through 2033, officials said.

    Washington State Crossing Park is significantly bigger than Bucks County’s 500-acre Washington Crossing Historic Park, which holds annual Christmas reenactments of the famed crossing. In recent years, Pennsylvania has provided funding for the restoration of more than a dozen historic structures at the park.

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    Michael Tanenbaum

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  • The Perfect Movie and TV Themed Getaways for Geeky Romantics

    The Perfect Movie and TV Themed Getaways for Geeky Romantics

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    From Stranger Things to Barbie, Disney fairytales, and a Halloweentown of your own—various creative destinations have undertaken the task of transporting guests into their own movie moments. This includes the pink-on-pink mid-century vibes at Palm Springs’ Trixie Motel, and thethemed rooms at Disney Parks’Disneyland…

    Read more…

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    Sabina Graves

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  • Dramatic Iceland Eruption Photos Show Lava Spreading Across Pristine Snow

    Dramatic Iceland Eruption Photos Show Lava Spreading Across Pristine Snow

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    Lava flows across snow-covered ground in southwestern Iceland.
    Photo: Marco Di Marco (AP)

    Southwestern Iceland has been a world transformed over the last few months, as initial tremors gave way to a full-throated volcanic eruption. The fishing village of Grindavík was evacuated in November, along with popular tourist destinations like the country’s Blue Lagoon, as residents held their breath for a potential eruption.

    And lo, a little later than expected, in December 2023, a large crack in the ground made by the initial quakes began to spew molten rock, captured in some remarkable photos. Another eruption happened last month, and now, a resurgence in volcanic activity forced lava across the snow-covered landscape in southwestern Iceland. The recent eruption—the third in as many months—started around 6 a.m. local time Thursday.

    “The power of the eruption has decreased. Now it is erupting mainly in three places on the crater that opened this morning,” Iceland’s meteorological office reported at 2 p.m. local time. “This is not unlike what was seen in the December 18 eruption, when the activity shifted to individual craters a few hours after eruption.”

    The lava flows and cooled rock from the recent activity have blanketed swaths of the region, as you’ll see in the following photos.

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    Isaac Schultz

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  • Disney, Fox and Warner Bros. team up to launch new sports streaming service

    Disney, Fox and Warner Bros. team up to launch new sports streaming service

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    Walt Disney Co.’s ESPN, Fox Corp. and Warner Bros. Discovery Inc. are teaming to create a joint sports streaming service.

    The as-yet unnamed service, which could be available as early as the fall and offer a sort of Hulu model for sports, comes amid an explosion in sports-streaming rights and audiences.

    The service would essentially be a skinny bundle of the companies’ linear channels, including ESPN, ESPN2, ESPNU, SECN, ACCN, ESPNEWS, ABC, Fox, FS1, FS2, BTN, TNT, TBS, truTV, as well as the ESPN+ streaming service.

    “The launch of this new streaming sports service is a significant moment for Disney
    DIS,
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    and ESPN, a major win for sports fans, and an important step forward for the media business,” Disney Chief Executive Bob Iger said in a statement late Tuesday. “This means the full suite of ESPN channels will be available to consumers alongside the sports programming of other industry leaders as part of a differentiated sports-centric service.”

    Added Warner Bros.
    WBD,

    CEO David Zaslav: “This new sports service exemplifies our ability as an industry to drive innovation and provide consumers with more choice, enjoyment and value and we’re thrilled to deliver it to sports fans.”

    Each company will own one-third of the platform, according to Disney, in a deal reminiscent of the original Hulu, which started off as a joint venture between ABC, Fox and NBCUniversal.

    The service will have a new brand with an independent management team, and will be available to bundle with Disney+, Hulu and Max subscriptions.

    “We’re pumped,” Fox
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    CEO Lachlan Murdoch said. “We believe the service will provide passionate fans outside of the traditional bundle an array of amazing sports content all in one place.”

    More details, including pricing, will be announced later.

    Prominently missing from the deal are Comcast Corp.
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    which owns NBCUniversal and its sports lineup that includes NFL football and the Olympics, and Paramount Global
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    which owns CBS — which carries the NFL and college football, among other sports.

    The new service will showcase thousands of high-profile sporting events and include all four major sports leagues — the NFL, NBA, MLB and NHL — as well as college football and basketball, golf, tennis, cycling, soccer and UFC.

    Shares of Disney were down 1% in extended trading Tuesday, while Fox shares jumped 6% and WBD gained 3%.

    Mike Murphy contributed to this report.

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  • Pigeon Delighting In Eating Chicken Wing Like Sophisticated German Cannibal

    Pigeon Delighting In Eating Chicken Wing Like Sophisticated German Cannibal

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    NEW YORK—Buffalo sauce dripping from its beak like blood from a baron’s walrus mustache, a local pigeon reportedly delighted in eating a chicken wing Friday as if it were a sophisticated German cannibal enjoying his forbidden delicacy. According to sources, the pigeon’s eyes took on a crazed glint, and it savored the supple tissues of its brethren fowl in a manner similar to an eccentric billionaire in a Black Forest hunting cabin indulging in human flesh. Reports confirmed that, not unlike a reclusive Bavarian nobleman who has taken in a lost American tourist after their car broke down in a thunderstorm only to serve them up to his esteemed dinner guests as a most exotic and taboo feast, the pigeon daintily picked the meat from the bone of its fellow bird with depraved glee. At press time, much like the German cannibal, the pigeon was said to have developed a peculiar and ravenous taste that could only be satiated by murdering and devouring its own kind.

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  • NFL has ‘decided to rip off fans’ with playoff game on Peacock, congressman says

    NFL has ‘decided to rip off fans’ with playoff game on Peacock, congressman says

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    ‘You’ve decided to rip off fans by exclusively broadcasting tomorrow’s Chiefs vs. Dolphins wild-card game on Peacock. For the first time ever, fans will be forced to choose between signing up for yet another expensive streaming service or missing out on a major playoff game.’

    That was part of a letter that Rep. Pat Ryan penned to leaders of the NFL and NBC Sports lamenting that an NFL playoff game this weekend will be available via steaming only for the first time.

    “How much more profit do [NFL commissioner Roger] Goodell and NBC need to make at the expense of hard working Americans?” the New York Democrat’s letter went on to ask.

    He wrote: “Congress granted the NFL an antitrust exemption in its broadcast deals with the expectation that you wouldn’t use it to screw over fans. That was clearly a mistake.” 

    Peacock, a streaming service operated by Comcast’s
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    NBCUniversal, is one of several streaming platforms that now broadcast NFL games. Some of those services, like Amazon’s
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    Prime Video, have exclusive rights to certain games, meaning there is no other option to watch on network or cable television, or through a cord-cutting live TV subscription. But while there have been NFL games available only on a streaming platform before, never before has it been a playoff game.

    Part of the reason that Ryan, along with many NFL fans, are upset that the Chiefs-Dolphins game is available exclusively on Peacock is that it’s been getting more expensive to watch the NFL in recent years — because, increasingly, games are not broadcast on network TV. In fact, the price to watch every NFL game this season for cord cutters was $1,603, not including the cost of internet service. 

    That commitment includes the cost of six streaming services and five username and password combinations. Those digital streaming services include Google’s
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    YouTube TV, NFL Sunday Ticket, Amazon Prime Video, Peacock, NFL+ and ESPN+
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    .

    And the NFL is reaping the rewards. A decade ago, the league made about $3 billion from its TV deals. But, through all of its broadcast deals today with both networks and streaming companies, it makes roughly $10 billion a year.

    Peacock has two plans: a $5.99-per-month subscription with ads, and another option for $11.99 a month that’s ad-free. While fans who live in the local broadcast areas of where the teams play (the media markets around Kansas City and Miami, in this case) will have the ability to watch the game on local TV, the rest of the country will have to pay for Peacock.

    According to the Wall Street Journal, NBC paid $110 million for Peacock’s exclusive NFL broadcast rights. 

    Many fans took to social media to vent their frustrations about having to buy another streaming service to watch an NFL game this weekend.

    Responding to the backlash, an NFL spokesperson said in a statement: “The NFL’s media strategy has been to make our games available in as many ways as possible to meet our fans where they spend their time. As streaming video becomes commonplace, we are increasingly expanding the digital distribution of NFL content while continuing a longstanding policy that all NFL games be shown on free, over-the-air television in the markets of the participating teams.”

    NBCUniversal did not respond to MarketWatch’s request for comment.

    Clermont, Fla., resident Calicia Landry, 53, has been a Dolphins fan for decades. Her family had season tickets during the historic 1972 season when the Dolphins went undefeated — the first and only time that has happened in NFL history.

    When asked if she will pay for Peacock to watch the game, Landry, whose town is in the Orlando, Fla., market, told MarketWatch that, despite Peacock’s cost of just $5, “it’s the principle now.”

    “I bought NFL Sunday Ticket already. I already pay for television service with DirecTV
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    .
    I had to have Prime to watch the Black Friday game,” she said. “It’s too much.”

    Read on: Here’s how much the major streaming services are set to cost are all the price increases

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  • Iowa Blizzard Forces Ron DeSantis, Nikki Haley To Share Hotel Room

    Iowa Blizzard Forces Ron DeSantis, Nikki Haley To Share Hotel Room

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    ORILLA, IA—With flights grounded and roads buried under inches of snow, blizzard conditions in Iowa reportedly forced Republican primary opponents Ron DeSantis and Nikki Haley to share a hotel room Friday. “Seriously? There’s not even a sofa?” said Haley, who groaned and returned DeSantis’ brooding scowl with a fiery glare of her own as the pair entered the cramped roadside motel room and surveyed its shabby conditions. “You’re not happy with this? Well, neither am I, Ron DeSantis! Believe me, this is the last place on earth I’d like to be right now! There’s no way in hell I’m sleeping on the floor, so let’s just put a blanket down the middle and agree not to cross that line. Now, I’m going to take a shower. You better not look, or you’re dead!” At press time, reports confirmed the two had locked eyes and shivered after accidentally brushing hands.

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  • Nebraskans for Medical Marijuana continue push to ballot – Medical Marijuana Program Connection

    Nebraskans for Medical Marijuana continue push to ballot – Medical Marijuana Program Connection

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    Group working to meet signature goal, get medical marijuana petitions on 2024 ballot

    NEBRASKA FOR MEDICAL MARIJUANA WERE OUT GATHERING SIGNATURES. THIS MORNING AS PART OF THE LAST CHANCE TO SIGN IN 2023 EVENT. THANKS FOR JOINING US. I’M SARAH FILI ADVOCATES HOPE TO PUT THE ISSUE IN FRONT OF NEBRASKA VOTERS IN THE 2024 ELECTION, AND AS KETV NEWSWATCH SEVEN’S KYLE LARSON REPORTS, THEY’VE ALREADY COLLECTED NEARLY. 60,000 SIGNATURES. ONE PROTECTS THE PATIENT. THE OTHER PROTECTS THE PROVIDER AND ESTABLISHES A REGULATORY COMMISSION FOR THE CANNABIS. CASS MOLLY SCOTT STANDS BEHIND HER POST SATURDAY MORNING IN HOPES OF FILLING THESE TWO SHEETS OF PAPER WITH SIGNATURES. NEBRASKANS FOR MEDICAL MARIJUANA NEED 87,000 VALID SIGNATURES ON EACH PETITION RIGHT NOW, THEY’RE AT ABOUT 30,000 PER PETITION. IT’S AN ISSUE, SCOTT FEELS STRONGLY ABOUT. PATIENTS THAT NEED CANNABIS FOR SEIZURE DISORDERS OR PAIN. PAIN OR WHATEVER THEIR CONDITION MIGHT BE. THEY DESERVE TO HAVE THE THE RIGHT TO HAVE SAFE, REGULATED, CLEAN CANNABIS. IN A STATEMENT SENT TO KETV NEWSWATCH SEVEN, JOHN KUHN WITH SMART APPROACHES TO MARIJUANA, NEBRASKA SAID, QUOTE, THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS MEDICAL MARIJUANA, ONLY THE SAME HIGH POTENCY DRUG THAT IS ABUSED RECREATIONALLY. IT IS NOT PRESCRIBED BY A PHYSICIAN OR…

    Original Author Link click here to read complete story..

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    MMP News Author

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  • Big Cyberpunk Update Added A Classic Keanu Reeves Meme

    Big Cyberpunk Update Added A Classic Keanu Reeves Meme

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    Cyberpunk 2077 just received a final hurrah via an update that added a number of fixes and new features, such as a working metro system. The new transit system lets V experience a bit more of pedestrian life in Night City, including a few random events on the train. One such event is a recreation of a well-known meme starring Keanu Reeves in a very sad (but relatable) pose.

    Read More: Every Change In Cyberpunk 2077’s Last Big Update

    The meme in question is known as “Sad Keanu,” and it features actor Keanu Reeves (who plays Johnny Silverhand in Cyberpunk 2077) chilling on a bench somewhere, casually eating some food while staring at the ground with a wistful expression. The original image was taken sometime around 2010 by photographer Ron Asadorian, and has since gone on to be a frequent image shared around the internet.

    How to find the ‘Sad Keanu’ meme in Cyberpunk 2077

    To find sad Keanu/sad Johnny, you need to update your game to version 2.1. After that, head to one of the newly opened metro stations (they are purple icons on the game’s map). At the metro, you have a choice of fast travel, or a first-person trip on the game’s metro system. Choose the latter by clicking “Ride metro.”

    After a quick glitched-out screen, you’ll take a seat on the metro and can look out the window as you traverse Night City. Alas, you can’t get up and walk around in the train.

    Sad Keanu is one of at least two randomly occurring events that can occur on the train (another involves someone begging for money). You can just spam the “Ride metro” option until you find him. Once you find him, you can just watch him sulk there, surrounded by some origami pigeons, sandwich in hand.

    Gif: CD Projekt Red / Kotaku

    Back in 2021, Keanu Reeves told Stephen Colbert on The Late Show that contrary to how the image looks, he wasn’t really sad when the photo was taken. “”I had some stuff going on. I was hungry,” he told the host.

    Since Johnny Silverhand can’t eat on account of being an engram and all that (and apparently there’s no smoking allowed on the transit system), I’d like to think sad Johnny is just sad that after blowing up that building the world still sucks. Maybe he really does want to get the band back together, but knows too much time has passed. Or maybe he’s just lonely watching V get all those new romance options. Right there with ya, samurai.

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    Claire Jackson

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  • How To Eat Healthy In Just 3 Bites

    How To Eat Healthy In Just 3 Bites

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    Eating right is a great way to boost your immune system as well as your mental health, but changing your habits and sticking to a regimen can be daunting. Fortunately, you don’t have to do any of that hard work, if you follow The Onion’s tips for eating healthy in just three bites.

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