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Learn from past love to improve future love. This worksheet will guide you step-by-step so that you can take away the most important lessons from your past relationships.
Past Relationships Worksheet (PDF)
Read Why It’s Healthy to Reflect on Your Past Relationships for more information.
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Steven Handel
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My biggest goal of the year is to get my friend’s book published.
Listen to learn more about my motivations, strategy, gameplan, and potential future.
I’ll keep you guys updated on the progress of this goal as we get further into the year.
If all goes well, I’ll be announcing our big accomplishment in a future episode. If we don’t succeed, then none of this ever happened…
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Steven Handel
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Times change but wisdom stays the same. Check out this collection of inspirational Latin proverbs and find one that really resonates with you.
Wisdom surpasses time and place. Powerful thoughts spoken hundreds and thousands of years ago still ring true to us today.
One of my lifelong pastimes is collecting positive thoughts of all stripes. I have whole documents dedicated to inspirational quotes from people I look up to as role models, uplifting and motivational affirmations I’ve discovered over the years, and personal thoughts (every now and then I create a good one all on my own!).
Latin proverbs, in particular, possess a special power. Many of us are already familiar with a few popular ones: carpe diem (“seize the day”), cogito ergo sum (“I think, therefore I am”), or veni, vidi, vici (“I came, I saw, I conquered”).
These phrases have endured over the centuries, with some becoming part of our everyday discourse and others adopted as popular sayings in various institutions, such as primum non nocere (“first, do no harm”), a common saying in medicine and healthcare, or pro bono (“for the good”) a phrase in law referring to a lawyer working for no charge, or sic semper tyrannis (“thus always to tyrants”) which is often applied to politics and government.
Here’s a compilation of the more popular and noteworthy Latin proverbs. These cover a broad range of subjects and ideas, but you’re bound to find a few new ones that resonate with you.
Acta non verba
(“deeds not words”)
Ad meliora
(“towards better things”)
Ad victoriam
(“to victory”)
Audere est faucere
(“to dare is to do”)
Astra inclinant, sed non obligant
(“the stars incline us, they do not bind us”)
Bono malum superate
(“good will overcome evil”)
Carpe diem
(“seize the day”)
Calamus gladio fortior
(“the pen is mightier than the sword”)
Cogito, ergo sum
(“I think, therefore I am”)
Cras es noster
(“tomorrow, be ours”)
Dictum factum
(“what is said is done”)
Duc, sequere, aut de via decede
(“lead, follow, or get out of the way”)
Dum spiro, spero
(“while I breathe, I hope”)
Ego te provoco
(“I challenge you”)
Est modus in rebus
(“there is a middle way in all things”)
Faber est suae quisque fortunae
(“every man is the artisan of his own fortune”)
Familia supra omnia
(“family over everything”)
Fons vitae caritas
(“love is the fountain of life”)
Fortiter et fideliter
(“bravely and faithfully”)
Gladiator in arena consilium capit
(“the gladiator is formulating his plan in the arena”)
Grandescunt aucta labore
(“by work, all things increase and grow”)
Humilitas occidit superbiam
(“humility kills pride”)
Igne natura renovatur integra
(“through fire nature is reborn whole”)
Incepto ne desistam
(“may I not shrink from my purpose”)
Magna est vis consuetudinis
(“great is the power of habit”)
Memento mori
(“remember you must die”)
Memento vivere
(“remember you have to live”)
Memores acti prudentes future
(“mindful of what has been done, aware of what will be”)
Morior invictus
(“death before defeat”)
Non ducor, duco
(“I am not led, I lead”)
Nosce te ipsum
(“know thyself”)
Omne initium difficile est
(“every beginning is difficult”)
Ordo ab chao
(“order out of chaos”)
Palma non sine pulvere
(“no reward without effort”)
Pax vobiscum
(“peace be with you”)
Praesis ut prosis ne ut imperes
(“lead in order to serve, not in order to rule”)
Praemonitus, praemunitus
(“forewarned is forearmed”)
Pro bono
(“for the good”)
Primum non nocere
(“first do no harm”)
Qui non proficit, deficit
(“he who does not advance, goes backward”)
Qui totum vult totum perdit
(“he who wants everything loses everything”)
Sapientia potentia est
(“wisdom is power”)
Si vis amari, ama
(“if you wish to be loved, love”)
Sic parvis magna
(“greatness from small beginnings”)
Sic semper tyrannis
(“thus always to tyrants”)
Sic vita est
(“such is life”)
Suum cuique
(“to each his own”)
Tempus fugit
(“time flies”)
Tendit in ardua virtus
(“virtue strives for what is difficult”)
Ubi concordia, ibi victoria
(“where is unity, there is victory”)
Vacate et scire
(“be still and know”)
Veni, vidi, vici
(“I came, I saw, I conquered”)
Verba volant, scripta manent
(“words fly away, writing remains”)
Vincit qui se vincit
(“he conquers who conquers himself”)
Vis medicatrix naturae
(“the healing power of nature”)
Which ones do you like the best from the list above?
Choose 1-3 of these Latin proverbs and find a way to integrate them into your daily life. Practice unconscious positivity: write one down and post it on your fridge or bathroom mirror, create a piece of art or music dedicated to one, or make one into a digital password.
I have “cras es noster” (tomorrow, be ours) on the top of my whiteboard going into the new year.
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Steven Handel
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An honest review of 2023, featuring stand-out articles, practical worksheets, and a preview of the near future at The Emotion Machine.
Another year is coming to an end. It’s time for my annual recap and roundup of best articles.
To start, I’ll say this year was a good year for me overall. Not excellent, not bad – but “good.” It was more turbulent than past years and I certainly had low moments, but I adapted quickly and made a couple major habit changes that are going to payoff big in the future.
Despite the chaos, I was remarkably consistent in my output this year. After a decade working on this site, creating new content is almost automatic for me. There’s no reason to assume I’ll be slowing down anytime soon, as new ideas and new projects are constantly coming to mind.
The most successful endeavor this year has been my addition of self-improvement worksheets.
Last year I pledged to make one new worksheet per month, so we already have a nice collection of 12 available going into the new year. These have received a lot of positive feedback so far and I’ll keep making new ones in 2024 (already have a long list of ideas).
I’ll share more on my goals for 2024 soon, but let’s first take a look at the best self-improvement content that was published at The Emotion Machine in 2023…
Here’s a list of my best articles and worksheets from 2023 by category.
No Matter How Bad Things Get: If I Can Overcome This, I Can Overcome Anything
Framing Depression as an Adaptive Signal, Not a Lifelong Disease
The Drawing Effect: How Doodling Can Improve Your Thinking, Memory, and Emotions
Renaissance Man: Why You Should Cultivate Multiple Interests
Going Cold Turkey: Breaking Free from the Chains of Unhealthy Behaviors
The Hidden Exhaustion of Mental Work: Why It Can Be Just as Tiring as Physical Labor
Abandon Your TV: The Mental Benefits of Canceling Your Cable Subscription
The Big 5 Personality Traits: A Framework for Understanding Our Differences
Conflict Resolution: 4 Principles Behind Constructive and Peaceful Negotiation
Words Have Consequences: The Power of Language in Effective Communication
Explain Yourself: The Healthy Challenge of Describing Your Beliefs
Mental Gymnastics: 7 Self-Sabotaging Effects of Over-Rationalization
The Gish Gallop Effect: How Rapid Argumentation Distorts Perceptions and Beliefs
I haven’t yet worked on my goals timeline, an annual tradition I do at the beginning of every year, but I’ll give you a quick peak at my main work goals in the near future:
All in all I’m excited about 2024, and the ideas above feel like a perfect balance between “sticking with what works” vs. “trying new things.”
If you find this work valuable to your life and want more, join me and support me going into the new year.
My entire archive currently has over 850 articles covering a wide-range of subjects in psychology and self-improvement; and there’s plenty more to come in the future. I’m just getting started.
To be honest with you, some of my earlier articles may not have aged as well as others. When you consistently produce content over 14 years, you inevitably release some less-than-stellar pieces. It’s a part of the process – having both “winning streaks” and “losing streaks” is a universal theme in life.
Over the years, my beliefs, values, and interests have also shifted since I first started this site. There are things I wrote in the past that I don’t wholly agree with today. However, I choose to keep these old posts accessible because people often need different advice at various stages of their lives.
I bet that’s not the hottest sales pitch you’ve ever heard. At heart, I consider myself a teacher more than a salesman, and that means being sincere, honest, and truthful before everything else. If you’re looking for “one trick” to magically fix your life, you’re in the wrong place. I don’t have those – never found them.
All I can do is offer an array of tools, advice, and guidelines. You ultimately have to figure out what applies (or doesn’t) to your life. In truth, 80% of the content on this site may not interest you at all, but there’s that 20% that could be just what you need at this exact moment in your life.
What I can promise you is that I’m one of the most dedicated writers on self-improvement currently going. I’ve seen thousands of other “self help” sites rise and fall over the years, but I keep chugging away no matter what.
If you want to align with my commitment to happiness and well-being, then your first step is to join me.
Better yet, get a Yearly subscription, for two simple reasons: 1) You’re committing yourself to a year of self-improvement, and 2) It’s cheaper. I’m honestly saying this from a self-improvement perspective and not a sales one.
You can cancel your membership at anytime. Please use the Contact form if you have any questions or comments.
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Steven Handel
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From ‘Bah, humbug!’ to redemption: Charles Dickens’ ‘A Christmas Carol’ unfolds as more than just a festive fable, offering profound insights into self-discovery, kindness, and rewriting one’s life story.
Charles Dickens’ timeless classic, “A Christmas Carol,” isn’t just a heartwarming tale of holiday spirit; it’s a profound exploration of human psychology and the power of personal transformation.
Many of us have heard the story before through countless movie and TV adaptations, especially the infamous Scrooge, whose name has now become a common insult toward those who fight against the holiday spirit of joy, kindness, and charity.
If you’re interested, you can read the original 1843 novella A Christmas Carol for free at Project Gutenberg. There are also many free audiobooks you can find and listen to.
The story opens the day before Christmas with Ebenezer Scrooge at work, a strict businessman who is described as miserable, lonely, and greedy, without any close friends or companions. His nephew visits, wishes him a cheerily “Merry Christmas!” and invites him to spend dinner with his family, but Scrooge rudely brushes off the kind gesture and responds with his trademark phrase “Bah humbug!”
Scrooge’s cynical and negative attitude is on full display in the opening chapter. “He carried his own low temperature always about with him.” In one instance where he is asked to donate money to help the poor, the wealthy Scrooge asks, “Aren’t there prisons? Aren’t there workhouses?” and then complains about the “surplus population.”
It’s clear that Scrooge’s only concerns and core values in life are money and wealth. If it doesn’t help his profits or bottom line then he doesn’t care about it, especially the well-being of others which he claims is “none of his business.”
The archetype of Scrooge is more relevant today than ever, especially in our corporatized world where rich elites isolate themselves from the rest of society while income inequality, crime, and economic woes continue to rise for the average person. Dickens observed early signs of increased materialism, narcissism, and greed almost two hundred years ago, but these unhealthy instincts have only grown rapidly since then. Social media has particularly warped people’s perceptions of wealth, status, and fame, which has in turn blinded us to many other important values in life.
In many cases people like Scrooge live lonely and miserable lives until they die, clinging to their money as they are lowered into their graves. However the story of “A Christmas Carol” provides hope and inspiration that people can change their paths in life if they are given the necessary insight and wisdom.
As the well-known tale goes, Scrooge is haunted by 3 benevolent spirits on consecutive nights (The Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future), each teaching him an essential lesson on what really matters in life.
This breakdown of past, present, and future creates a complete picture of one’s life. It’s a powerful framework to spark self-growth in any person. Once we reevaluate where we’ve been, where we are, and where we want to go, we have a much clearer idea on what the right path forward is.
Keep in mind you don’t need to be religious to reap the benefits of this story. Its lessons are universal. While there are supernatural and spiritual elements, the wisdom is real and tangible.
Before Scrooge is visited by the three spirits, he encounters the ghost of his former business partner Marley who had died seven years ago.
The ghost of Marley is shown to be in a type of purgatory, aimlessly roaming the town, entangled in many heavy chains with cash-boxes, keys, padlocks, ledgers, deeds, and heavy purses made out of steel, representing a lifetime of greed and selfishness:
“Or would you know,” pursued the Ghost, “the weight and length of the strong coil you bear yourself? It was full as heavy and as long as this, seven Christmas Eves ago. You have laboured on it, since. It is a ponderous chain!”
The ghost lets Scrooge know that his actions have far-reaching consequences too. He will suffer a similar fate if he doesn’t change his ways, but there’s still hope for redemption! He then leaves, announcing to Scrooge that he will soon be visited by three spirits that will guide him to a better path.
Marley’s ghost serves as a warning, but also a sign of hope.
Scrooge’s first encounter is with the “Ghost of Christmas Past,” who serves as a poignant reminder that we must confront our history to understand our present.
The Ghost of Christmas Past transports Scrooge through various memories he had as a child and young adult, showing his psychological development over time.
The first scene brings Scrooge back to his childhood town, where he is immediately rushed with feelings of nostalgia, cheerfulness, and joy. These positive memories depict a very different Scrooge from present, revealing his once optimistic and hopeful disposition. What happened to him since?
The memories begin to grow darker. Multiple scenes show Scrooge spending Christmas alone as a young child, one time being left by himself at boarding school while his friends were celebrating the holidays with family, and another time sitting solitarily by the fire reading. Scrooge begins to shed tears and show sympathy toward his former, abandoned self.
One of the most pivotal memories is when young adult Scrooge is speaking with his past lover. She notices a fundamental change in him that has become a dealbreaker in their relationship.
She sees that money has become Scrooge’s God which he puts above all other values, including love. The young woman continues…
Here we begin to see Scrooge’s hardening into the man he is in the present.
His pursuit of wealth as his main source of comfort and satisfaction has damaged his relationship beyond repair. The lover sees no other option but for them to go their separate ways. The memory deeply pains Scrooge and he cries out for the ghost to show him no more.
In truth we are all a product of our past, including our environment and the choices we make in life. Scrooge has clearly gone through hardships and taken wrong turns that have influenced where he finds himself today; but it’s not too late.
The Ghost of Christmas Past forced Scrooge to remember events that he had long forgotten, neglected, or ignored because they were too painful to think about. While these old memories cannot be altered, you have to accept your past, be honest with yourself, and forgive yourself if you want to learn, grow, and change for the better.
One of the main lessons here is that you need to take responsibility for the past before you can take power over the future. Scrooge is suffering, but he’s learning.
Scrooge’s next encounter is with the “Ghost of Christmas Present,” who teaches Scrooge all the opportunities for good that cross his path every single day.
The spirit is colorfully dressed with holly, mistletoe, berries, turkeys, sausages, oysters, pies, puddings, fruit, and punch surrounding him, a representation of the simple pleasures in life we can all learn to appreciate, savor, and be grateful for.
First, the Ghost of Christmas Present takes Scrooge for a walk outside in the town during Christmas Day, observing all the happiness, zest, and cheer overflowing through the streets. Everyone from all backgrounds is enjoying the festivities.
When two people bump into each other and start a small fight, the ghost sprinkles a magical substance on them which instantly ends the argument and brings both back to a more joyful demeanor.
On Christmas, all fights are optional.
The ghost then leads Scrooge to the home of Bob Cratchit, his current employee who he often treats poorly. Here Scrooge is introduced to Bob’s sick and disabled son Tiny Tim, who despite his illness is still excited to spend holiday time with the family. The poor family makes the most of the limited food and time they have together, including a fake “goose” dinner made out of apple sauce and mashed potatoes.
Scrooge looks on in sympathy and wishes he could do more to help them. He asks the spirit about the current state of Tiny Tim’s health:
“I see a vacant seat,” replied the Ghost, “in the poor chimney-corner, and a crutch without an owner, carefully preserved. If these shadows remain unaltered by the Future, the child will die.”
In another scene, Scrooge is transported to the home of his sister’s family, the same party his nephew invited him to the previous day. Everyone in the household is enjoying the Christmas holiday while singing, dancing, and playing games. Several times Scrooge is brought up in conversation and everyone can only laugh and shrug at Scrooge’s relentless misery and gloom.
Scrooge knows that these events and perceptions by others are part of his own doing.
At every turn, Scrooge denies taking advantage of daily opportunities for happiness, including rejecting a group of children singing carols, responding rudely to acquaintances (“Bah humbug!”), and refusing to give to charities or help others when it’s fully in his power.
These events are small, but they build up over time. Whenever Scrooge is given a choice between kindness vs. coldness, he chooses to be cold. After enough tiny social interactions, Scrooge has cemented his reputation around town as being the miserable miser.
Can he still change it?
The final spirit Scrooge meets is the “Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come” or the “Ghost of Christmas Future.” This ghost blends in with the darkness of the night, wearing a long black robe that covers their entire face and body, except for a boney hand it uses to silently point.
The ghost begins by showing men on the streets joking and laughing about someone who has just passed away. At a pawn shop, robbers are selling stolen property they recently seized from the dead man’s estate, saying it’s for the best since the items will no longer serve any use to him. Scrooge, perplexed by the meaning of these scenes, intently watches on. Another man jokes:
Scene by scene, people show ambivalence toward the death. Scrooge grows frustrated and asks:
Now they see a family that was in debt to the dead man, and they are feeling humble gratitude and quiet glee that they no longer have to worry themselves about such an evil creditor:
Already having suspicions on who this man is, Scrooge begs the ghost to finally reveal where his future lies. The ghost travels to a graveyard and points at a tombstone that upon inspection reads: Ebenezer Scrooge
Scrooge’s heart sinks. Next it’s shown that Tiny Tim hasn’t recovered from his illness and has also passed away, and at such a young age. Feeling completely hopeless at this point, Scrooge desperately begs:
“Men’s courses will foreshadow certain ends, to which, if persevered in, they must lead. But if the courses be departed from, the ends will change. Say it is thus with what you show me!”
As long as you’re alive and breathing, you have the power to change.
When we think about death, it puts everything about life into perspective. Our time is finite in this world and we must make the most of it without being distracted by trivialities and lesser values. If you were laying on your deathbed right now, what would your main regrets be?
When Scrooge reflects on his own death and what influence he’d leave on the world, it shakes him at his core – but also transforms him.
After the visitations of the three ghosts, Scrooge wakes up a changed man ready to start his new life. He rises from bed excited, hopeful, and giddy that he’s still alive and still has a chance to change his current course.
Upon finding out it’s still Christmas Day, he buys a prize turkey to send to the Cratchit family and begins giving generous amounts of money to children and the poor. He continues to walk around the town square, giving everyone warm greetings and a hearty “Merry Christmas!”
When he sees Bob Cratchit the next day at work, he immediately gives him a raise in salary and promises to take care of Tiny Tim and assist the family in anyway possible. He becomes a lifelong friend to the family.
This sudden change in Scrooge’s behavior confused the townsfolk at first, including many who made fun of this rapid transformation that was so uncharacteristic of Scrooge. But these words and gossip didn’t bother him:
At its core, “A Christmas Carol” is a story of redemption and heroism. Scrooge’s journey from miserly recluse to benevolent samaritan exemplifies the human capacity for change.
By reflecting on his past, present, and future self, Scrooge discovered the best path forward – a process that applies to all forms of self-improvement.
This story has insightful lessons that can apply to anyone’s life, no matter what situation they find themselves in. We can’t change the past chapters, but we can change how our story ends.
Never forget you have the power to rewrite your life story at any time.
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Steven Handel
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Embark on a journey to well-being with these four profound Japanese concepts: Ikigai for purpose, Moai for community, Hara Hachi Bu for mindful eating, and Kintsugi for resilience. Discover insights to a healthier and happier life in the modern world by embracing the ancient wisdom of Japanese culture.
Culture is a powerful force that influences the type of person we become. In the pursuit of well-being, different cultures can often teach us different lessons on what it means to live a good life.
First, what is culture? The American anthropologist Edward T. Hall created the “Cultural Iceberg” framework to help us analyze the many factors that determine what a culture is. The theory illustrates that only 10% of culture is what we see (language, diet, music, fashion), while 90% of culture is hidden from us (beliefs, values, norms, and expectations).
Here’s what the “Cultural Iceberg” looks like:
Generally we see the culture we grew up in as the default mode of being. This includes how people dress, what people eat, and what music they listen to, but also deeper aspects of life such as beliefs, values, morality, and how people approach life from a broader perspective.
Culture, tradition, and social norms shape our map of reality, the choices we make, and how we navigate our world. If you’re raised in a society that only values materialistic goals like money, fame, or popularity, you’re naturally going to live a life in accordance with those values, especially if they go unquestioned.
When we explore new cultures through traveling, reading, or meeting new people, we learn that there are many different ways we can approach life and the way we were raised isn’t necessarily the only way to live.
One simplified but general way we can categorize different types of culture is Western vs. Eastern ways of thinking. Western cultures tend to be more individualistic, rational, and materialistic, while Eastern cultures tend to be more collectivist, holistic, and spiritual.
Keep in mind, these are broad categorizations. Every country and culture is different. This also isn’t a judgment of “right” or “wrong” ways of thinking, but rather observing different personality types on a cultural scale.
My experience from a Western perspective is that learning about various aspects of Eastern culture and philosophy (such as Buddhism, Taoism, or Confucianism) gave me a taste for different ways to look at the world and different perspectives on life that I otherwise wouldn’t have been exposed to.
One popular country to look at is Japan which has a rich history, deep cultural roots, and long-held traditions that have been passed down over multiple generations. In this article, we’re going to cover four powerful Japanese concepts that provide universal lessons on how to live a healthier and happier life. Each concept reveals core values and beliefs that shape the way many Japanese people live.
These powerful ideas include: Ikigai (“a reason for being”), Moai (“meeting for a common purpose”), Hara Hachi Bu (“belly 80% full”), and Kintsugi (“golden repair”). Now let’s dive deeper into each one!
a reason for being
The Japanese concept of “Ikigai” is about finding a purpose in life. It directly translates to “a reason for being,” and it’s often described as the intersection between what you love, what you are good at, and what the world needs.
Ikigai is a combination between intrinsic motivation (an activity you enjoy doing) and extrinsic rewards (an activity that creates value in the world and improves people’s lives). Psychology research has shown that ikigai is associated with elevated feelings of dedication, accomplishment, meaning, and fulfillment.
This is in contrast to a lot of other cultures that just see work as a means to a paycheck or higher income, rather than reframing work as something that serves a higher purpose, both to yourself and society as a whole.
Ikigai has been shown to benefit both physical and mental health. It can reduce stress and anxiety, which contributes to longer lives and less risk of cardiovascular disease and other ailments. In addition, ikigai is associated with greater resilience in the face of negative events. One interesting study found that ikigai helped people better cope with stress after an earthquake or natural disaster.
Here’s a visual of what constitutes ikigai:
If you can find activities that meet all of these requirements, then you’ve found your ikigai.
Discovering your ikigai can take time and patience though. It involves careful introspection, understanding your strengths, passions, and talents, and finding ways to use those powers to fulfill the needs of the world.
Once you find your ikigai, it’s important to align your daily activities with it if you want to build a more purposeful and meaningful life.
meeting for a common purpose
Human connection is vital for our well-being, and the Japanese practice of “Moai” emphasizes the strength of communal bonds.
Moai refers to a group of people who come together for a shared purpose, providing emotional, social, and even financial support. Often a moai includes family, friends, and neighbors within a local community. They will see each other frequently, talk and catch up on each other’s lives, and organize group activities such as game nights, fitness groups, music performances, or dance parties.
This tight sense of community provides an important sense of belonging. It also comes with physical benefits like healthier lifestyles, exercise, social connection, and financial support if someone finds themselves in a tough situation.
In today’s world, many people are suffering from loneliness and depression. One major cause of this is hyper individualism and atomistic lifestyles that no longer promote community values. Many Americans report having zero close friends and only 38% say they have “5 friends or more.” This is in stark contrast to the moai way of life which can often include 10-12+ lifelong friends.
While there’s plenty of research showing the physical and mental benefits of social support, one of the most common examples of moai can be found in Okinawa, Japan, which has been identified as a “blue zone.”
Blue zones are places around the world that are associated with better health and longevity. Often there are high numbers of centenarians in them (or people who have lived over 100). The recent Netflix documentary Live to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zones by public health researcher Dan Buettner has a great episode dedicated to Okinawa that shows how the moais work there.
Many health professionals and experts are now claiming we are in a “loneliness epidemic,” with over 1 in 4 adults saying they feel socially isolated. This can have serious health consequences such as increased risk of anxiety, depression, heart disease, stroke, dementia, and overall shorter lifespans. The negative effects of loneliness have been compared to the effects of daily cigarette smoking.
As communities continue to decline and feelings of social alienation increase, the moai mentality is needed now more than ever.
belly 80% full
In a culture often associated with healthy living and longevity, the Japanese concept of “Hara Hachi Bu” teaches us the art of mindful eating. Translated as “belly 80% full,” this practice encourages moderation in our meals.
Obesity is a growing problem around the entire world. Recent reports show that 39% of the global population in 2023 is obese or overweight, and this is a sharp increase from 23.9% in 2008. If this trend continues, researchers predict that over half of the global population will have obesity by 2035.
One factor in this rise in obesity is having abundant access to ultraprocessed foods, including the convenience of fast food and junk food. The modern diet is filled with supernormal foods that hijack our natural instincts for sugar, salts, and rich flavor, which is why many people end up over-eating during meals or late night binging.
The lesson of Hara Hachi Bu is more relevant now than ever. By reminding ourselves to only eat until we are 80% full, we encourage slower and more mindful eating. This lets you enjoy your meal more by paying attention to each bite and savoring it, rather than quickly moving from one bite to the next without fully appreciating it.
Many people eat unconsciously. Often it’s eating while watching TV/movies, checking their phones, scrolling social media, or socializing with friends. Their main focus is on one thing, while eating is just something happening in the background. These distractions can lead you to eat more than you otherwise would.
Slowing down your eating will lead to less consumption, better digestion, and improved body awareness of how you respond to certain foods, the best times of the day to eat (or not), and what it feels like to be “50% full” → “80% full” → “100% full” → “110% full.”
Adopting Hara Hachi Bu not only contributes to physical well-being by maintaining a healthy weight but also cultivates a mindful approach to eating that can lead to a stronger connection with the food we consume.
golden repair
Derived from the Japanese words “kin” (golden) and “tsugi” (repair), Kintsugi is the art of repairing broken pottery with lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum.
Here’s what it looks like:
Instead of hiding the cracks and flaws, the practice of kintsugi embraces the broken parts by highlighting them in gold. It celebrates its imperfections, while at the same time making them stronger and more beautiful.
Many find inspiration when applying this concept to their personal lives. It helps them to accept the challenges and obstacles they’ve had to face over the years – the physical, mental, and emotional battle scars – and see them as jumping points for growth and improvement.
No one’s life is perfect. We all suffer from weaknesses, flaws, insecurities, and vulnerabilities. Our instinct is to hide them, ignore them, or deny them, but the paradox is that when we accept them is when we actually become stronger.
Kintsugi promotes resilience, growth, and grit. It shows that no matter how many times you get broken, you can always repair yourself in gold.
Each of these Japanese concepts – Ikigai, Moai, Hara Hachi Bu, and Kintsugi – offers a kernel of wisdom that we can all apply to our daily lives.
While these ideas are ancient, they are more relevant to modern living than ever before. Ikigai teaches us meaning and purpose, Moai teaches us social connection, Hara Hachi Bu teaches us mindful eating, and Kintsugi teaches us growth and resilience.
Which concept do you need to embrace the most right now?
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Steven Handel
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At the end of the fourth Republican debate, the four candidates were asked to name a president that would serve as an inspiration for their administration.
A potpourri of some of America’s most popular presidents were listed.
Chris Christie picked Ronald Reagan, whom he called “a slave to the truth.” Nikki Haley, unable to choose one, named George Washington and Abraham Lincoln. And Vivek Ramaswamy chose Thomas Jefferson — author of the Declaration of Independence and inventor of the swivel chair — for his “founding spirit.”
But when it was Ron DeSantis’ turn, he named a president who often goes overlooked.
“One of the guys I’ll take inspiration from is Calvin Coolidge,” DeSantis said to scattered applause.
“Now people don’t talk about him a lot,” DeSantis, who studied history at Yale University, said. “He’s one of the few presidents that got almost everything right.”
“Silent Cal” understood the federal government’s role, DeSantis added. “The country was in great shape when he was president of the United States. And we can learn an awful lot from Calvin Coolidge.”
Coolidge, America’s 30th president, was born in Vermont in 1872. The son of a shopkeeper, he climbed the political ladder to become the governor of Massachusetts.
He was elected vice president in 1920 alongside Republican President Warren Harding, who died unexpectedly in August 1923.
Coolidge, who was in Vermont at the time, had his father administer the oath of office early in the morning on Aug. 3 “by the light of a kerosene lamp,” according to the White House.
Throughout his presidency, he was “distinguished for character more than for heroic achievement,” Democrat Alfred Smith wrote.
A proponent of small government, Coolidge called on Congress to cut taxes and to avoid foreign entanglements.
During his six years in office, he balanced the budget every year. He notably detested constant government activity, once saying, “Don’t hurry to legislate,” according to his presidential foundation.
His “political genius,” according to reporter Walter Lippmann, was his penchant for “effectively doing nothing.”
“This active inactivity suits the mood and certain of the needs of the country admirably,” Lippmann wrote, according to the White House. “It suits all the business interests which want to be let alone … And it suits all those who have become convinced that government in this country has become dangerously complicated and top-heavy.”
Still, he signed into law several major pieces of legislation, including the Indian Citizenship Act in 1924, which granted American citizenship to all Native Americans.
Coolidge left office in 1929, the year the Great Depression began ravaging the American economy and eroding his reputation, according to David Greenberg, a history professor at Rutgers University.
“Many linked the nation’s economic collapse to Coolidge’s policy decisions,” Greenberg wrote. “His failure to aid the depressed agricultural sector seems shortsighted, as nearly five thousand rural banks in the Midwest and South shut their doors in bankruptcy while many thousands of farmers lost their lands.”
Before he died in 1933, Coolidge told a friend, “I feel I no longer fit in with these times,” according to the White House.
In a 2021 ranking by historians, Coolidge placed 24th out of 44 presidents.
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Ready for a major lifestyle change? Uncover successful strategies when embracing the “cold turkey” approach to break bad habits, making the process of change both easy and manageable.
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Steven Handel
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Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
Great quotes can be inspirational and motivational. You can use quotes to help guide your decisions in life, work and love. Here are 50 of the best inspirational quotes to motivate you:
A version of this article first appeared at TalentSmart.com.
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Travis Bradberry
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Who do you look up to in life? We are a product of our influences. Complete this “Role Models” worksheet to create an endless resource of people you can be motivated and inspired by.
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Steven Handel
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I can’t recall when it was that I last sat down to write a post of this nature but every week can feel like a lifetime these days. After a period of feeling rather exhausted, new work, a new desire to serve is inviting me to show up in a new way. It has me thinking that we all need to be showing up right now. This is your time!
In the Spring of 2022, I wrapped up the live delivery of my two newest offerings, 4 Week Wake-Up and the Rise + Shine Intuition Masterclass.
I can’t speak for my participants, though many expressed a similar sentiment, but for me – sharing these workshops with the group offered a profound dose of peace to my soul. It’s the only way, however “woo woo” it may sound, that I can explain it.
We came together with a shared desire to live a life that is more at ease, tuned in, real and purpose-driven. It was refreshing, to be honest. But the fear persisted.
This past May marked fifeteen years since I started my company and in that time I have launched dozens, maybe even more than a hundred things – products, books, courses, events and a school.
Every time I create and get ready to put something out in the world, I am overcome with both fear that I am out of my depth and fear that no one will come along.
The same held true for this offering, which, by the way, I am re-releasing as one consolidated, self-paced course called Rise and Shine, so if you missed out on the live run, it’s not too late.
Here is the thing though– the work that I do feels purpose-driven for me. It gives me a sense of meaning. As such, to resist the inspiration, I have come to learn, is impossible. It only grows in my mind until it becomes all-consuming. Taking action becomes the only option.
As we explored in the last week of the Wake-Up series, when seeking our purpose it all comes down to answering the question “How can I serve?”. For this reason, even though nearly every single day for the last fifteen years I wake up in the morning with some level of doubt and fear, I do it anyway. I move forward because I have learned to allow the drive towards fulfilling on my calling to be stronger than my fear or doubt.
This is how we continue to gain confidence and trust in ourselves to speak what is true; to say out loud (or via Instagram or Twitter or in friendly, calm and curiosity-driven conversations!) what so many people are thinking but are afraid to say.
See, when we can be grounded as the authentic superhumans that we are for most of our day, in the work we do, the relationships we keep, and the conversations we have, then what we are doing is strengthening our personal authority which directly dims the noise and demands from the outside world.
We get to enjoy the strength and calm that comes from building our confidence in being exactly who we are.
It’s not a special skill or knowledge you need to get from someone else. It’s simply about taking the time to tune in and pay attention to what your soul is trying to tell you — maybe you call it an inner voice, that feeling in the pit of your stomach, instinct, intuition or a hunch. (How you describe it is irrelevant).
The fact is, when the path is right, you feel it. The energy is there. The inspiration is there. Yes, it may feel uncomfortable. There may be stress, fear and anxiety. But consider for a moment whether those nerves are actually part of your breaking through to living a bigger and more truth-driven life as you move closer to thriving in the full expression of who you are?
This, my friend, is how you get your energy, your inspiration, and your spark back.
This is where you get your life back.
Do you know where it starts? It begins with personal responsibility.
Now, this is something that has waned in popularity in the mainstream paradigm of late. It is of course a lot easier to blame rules, regulations, people, and circumstances outside ourselves for our current state of being — but that’s not going to change it.
You get to write and re-write the instructions for how you operate in your life. Might I suggest that it is time, maybe even past due, that you write the instructions that invite you to live a life that gives you a sense of meaning, purpose and being of service? A way of living that is real and truthful and brave? Can you do it? Maybe you already are.
This isn’t in an ego-driven / selfie-taking / public persona / public acceptance / out THERE thing.
This isn’t about that at all.
This is about tuning in and rising up, ditching any fear or reservations you have about pursuing what brings you into the full expression of who you are. If we all operated from this place for as many minutes or hours of the day as we could manage, we’d be living in a very different world — on both the individual scale and the big wide world scale of things.
It is time to get your groove back, or maybe get to know it for the first time.
If you have absolutely no clue what your first move is, I have some suggestions.
That class/skill/thing you’ve been thinking about learning – do that. Sign up, get started, and make it happen. Do it.
The offering I have that swings that door wide open is the Culinary Nutrition Expert Program, which is my flagship baby. Yes, it’s about cooking but anyone who has done it will tell you it is also about a whole lot more. It’s about asking big questions, learning how to find the answers, experiencing firsthand what you are capable of and how transformations can feel when guided gently. This program challenges, supports, connects and inspires. It will shift your confidence and motivation in the kitchen, but also in your life.
If you’re curious about the impact this offering has had on those who have done it, try a sample class. What would you like to learn? How to make a dairy-free, protein rich milk? Or how about some sauerkraut?
Lastly, if you want to tune in to that inner voice and take a low-risk dive into some of the things I’ve shared here, check out Rise and Shine, my newest instant-access course that will help you upgrade how you operate.
Ultimately– just start.
Stand up, feet firmly planted on the earth, letting your heart lead the way. It’s time to shine.
Sending big love to you!
Subscribe today on your favourite podcast app and never miss an episode.
Photo Credit: Nikki McKean
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Meghan Telpner
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I can’t recall when it was that I last sat down to write a post of this nature but every week can feel like a lifetime these days. After a period of feeling rather exhausted, new work, a new desire to serve is inviting me to show up in a new way. It has me thinking that we all need to be showing up right now. This is your time!
In the Spring of 2022, I wrapped up the live delivery of my two newest offerings, 4 Week Wake-Up and the Rise + Shine Intuition Masterclass.
I can’t speak for my participants, though many expressed a similar sentiment, but for me – sharing these workshops with the group offered a profound dose of peace to my soul. It’s the only way, however “woo woo” it may sound, that I can explain it.
We came together with a shared desire to live a life that is more at ease, tuned in, real and purpose-driven. It was refreshing, to be honest. But the fear persisted.
This past May marked fifeteen years since I started my company and in that time I have launched dozens, maybe even more than a hundred things – products, books, courses, events and a school.
Every time I create and get ready to put something out in the world, I am overcome with both fear that I am out of my depth and fear that no one will come along.
The same held true for this offering, which, by the way, I am re-releasing as one consolidated, self-paced course called Rise and Shine, so if you missed out on the live run, it’s not too late.
Here is the thing though– the work that I do feels purpose-driven for me. It gives me a sense of meaning. As such, to resist the inspiration, I have come to learn, is impossible. It only grows in my mind until it becomes all-consuming. Taking action becomes the only option.
As we explored in the last week of the Wake-Up series, when seeking our purpose it all comes down to answering the question “How can I serve?”. For this reason, even though nearly every single day for the last fifteen years I wake up in the morning with some level of doubt and fear, I do it anyway. I move forward because I have learned to allow the drive towards fulfilling on my calling to be stronger than my fear or doubt.
This is how we continue to gain confidence and trust in ourselves to speak what is true; to say out loud (or via Instagram or Twitter or in friendly, calm and curiosity-driven conversations!) what so many people are thinking but are afraid to say.
See, when we can be grounded as the authentic superhumans that we are for most of our day, in the work we do, the relationships we keep, and the conversations we have, then what we are doing is strengthening our personal authority which directly dims the noise and demands from the outside world.
We get to enjoy the strength and calm that comes from building our confidence in being exactly who we are.
It’s not a special skill or knowledge you need to get from someone else. It’s simply about taking the time to tune in and pay attention to what your soul is trying to tell you — maybe you call it an inner voice, that feeling in the pit of your stomach, instinct, intuition or a hunch. (How you describe it is irrelevant).
The fact is, when the path is right, you feel it. The energy is there. The inspiration is there. Yes, it may feel uncomfortable. There may be stress, fear and anxiety. But consider for a moment whether those nerves are actually part of your breaking through to living a bigger and more truth-driven life as you move closer to thriving in the full expression of who you are?
This, my friend, is how you get your energy, your inspiration, and your spark back.
This is where you get your life back.
Do you know where it starts? It begins with personal responsibility.
Now, this is something that has waned in popularity in the mainstream paradigm of late. It is of course a lot easier to blame rules, regulations, people, and circumstances outside ourselves for our current state of being — but that’s not going to change it.
You get to write and re-write the instructions for how you operate in your life. Might I suggest that it is time, maybe even past due, that you write the instructions that invite you to live a life that gives you a sense of meaning, purpose and being of service? A way of living that is real and truthful and brave? Can you do it? Maybe you already are.
This isn’t in an ego-driven / selfie-taking / public persona / public acceptance / out THERE thing.
This isn’t about that at all.
This is about tuning in and rising up, ditching any fear or reservations you have about pursuing what brings you into the full expression of who you are. If we all operated from this place for as many minutes or hours of the day as we could manage, we’d be living in a very different world — on both the individual scale and the big wide world scale of things.
It is time to get your groove back, or maybe get to know it for the first time.
If you have absolutely no clue what your first move is, I have some suggestions.
That class/skill/thing you’ve been thinking about learning – do that. Sign up, get started, and make it happen. Do it.
The offering I have that swings that door wide open is the Culinary Nutrition Expert Program, which is my flagship baby. Yes, it’s about cooking but anyone who has done it will tell you it is also about a whole lot more. It’s about asking big questions, learning how to find the answers, experiencing firsthand what you are capable of and how transformations can feel when guided gently. This program challenges, supports, connects and inspires. It will shift your confidence and motivation in the kitchen, but also in your life.
If you’re curious about the impact this offering has had on those who have done it, try a sample class. What would you like to learn? How to make a dairy-free, protein rich milk? Or how about some sauerkraut?
Lastly, if you want to tune in to that inner voice and take a low-risk dive into some of the things I’ve shared here, check out Rise and Shine, my newest instant-access course that will help you upgrade how you operate.
Ultimately– just start.
Stand up, feet firmly planted on the earth, letting your heart lead the way. It’s time to shine.
Sending big love to you!
Subscribe today on your favourite podcast app and never miss an episode.
Photo Credit: Nikki McKean
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Meghan Telpner
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Folks, Nelson Mandela – an extraordinary leader, an agent of change, a man of principle. He left behind an invaluable legacy of wisdom through his unforgettable and inspiring quotes. His words often represented his unwavering commitment to social justice, equality, and human rights.
Through his quotations, Mandela encourages each one of us to embrace all aspects of life with equal vigor and determination. Let’s delve further into his profound words:
“No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.”
Nelson Mandela
A fundamental principle in Mandela’s life was the practice of compassion, understanding, and love towards all human beings, regardless of their race, cultures, or beliefs. This was reflected in many of his beloved quotes.
“No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.” – Nelson Mandela
Indeed, Mandela’s journey was marked by a deep understanding of the interconnectedness of all people. He often urged others to mirror this compassion and kindness.
It’s this sense of empathy and care for others that often shines through in many of his thought-provoking quotes. Throughout his wisdom-filled words and lived experiences, Mandela conveys a universal message that love, kindness, and humanity can bring a transformative life.
Also read: Top 25 Most Powerful Martin Luther King Jr. Quotes
You may already know that Nelson Mandela, the revered South African icon, wore many hats. From anti-apartheid revolutionary to politician, Mandela’s persona extends far beyond these roles. Born on July 18, 1918, in Mvezo, South Africa, Mandela grew up experiencing the harsh realities of racial prejudice.
He joined the African National Congress in 1943, where he initiated his spirited fight against apartheid. A lawyer by education, Mandela co-founded South Africa’s first black law firm in 1952, providing affordable legal counsel to those affected by apartheid legislation. The Rivonia Trial of 1963 marked a turning point in Mandela’s life, where his passionate court speech resonated globally. Sadly, this same trial resulted in a 27-year prison sentence.
But Mandela’s indomitable spirit was not crushed. From his prison cell on Robben Island, he continued his fight, becoming a symbol of hope for all who sought equality. In 1990, global pressure finally led to Mandela’s release, and by 1994, South Africa saw him sworn in as the country’s first Black President – an awe-inspiring end to the apartheid era.
Mandela’s wisdom, perseverance, and unwavering dedication to equality continue to inspire long after his passing in December 2013. So, let’s walk through some of his most transformative quotes that encapsulate his undying spirit.
There’s no denying that Nelson Mandela was a beacon of hope for many during his lifetime and remains so even today. The iconic South African leader, who triumphed over adversity to become a leading voice for justice and equality, was known for his beautifully poignant words. And now, we invite you to immerse yourself in some of his most inspirational quotes.
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”
Amid the hardships, it’s easy for one to feel overwhelmed and deflated. But Mandela’s words remind us that the journey is not about avoiding mistakes but about learning from them. After all, it’s not about how many times you fall, it’s about how many times you get back up. That’s where the true glory of life resides.
Experiencing a humble journey from prison to the presidency, Nelson Mandela has left a wealth of wisdom through his thought-provoking words. These quotes reflect his resilient spirit, his unwavering courage, and his impassioned pursuit of justice. They continue to motivate and inspire individuals around the world, guiding us to seek a world characterized by equality, unity, and peace.
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”
This quote encapsulates Mandela’s belief in resilience and perseverance. Despite all the adversities he faced, he never lost the faith to rise and fight again – a lesson for all of us to remember.
“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it.”
Here, Mandela seeks to redefine courage. It does not mean ignoring fear, but rather accepting it and moving forward anyway. It’s a reminder for us to transform our fears into stepping stones on the route to success.
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.”
This quote of wisdom encapsulates the tenacity and perseverance that marked Mandela’s life. It’s a powerful reminder that the most daunting tasks can be accomplished if we put our heart and soul into it.
Mandela’s words aren’t just quotes, they are profound life lessons that transcend time and geographic boundaries. They inspire us, motivate us, and most importantly, instill within us a longing for a fairer, more equitable world.
As you journey through life, let the unforgettable and inspiring words of Nelson Mandela guide you. As one of the world’s most influential leaders, Mandela’s wisdom can aid you in navigating life’s daily complexities. Here are some of Mandela’s most inspiring quotes:
1. “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
2. “It always seems impossible until it’s done.”
3. “Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.”
4. “To be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”
Each of these quotes carries a profound lesson. They remind us of the importance of courage in the face of fear, persistence in the face of challenges, resilience in the face of failure, and respect and consideration for the freedom and well-being of others. With Mandela’s wisdom in mind, everyday life becomes a meaningful journey to explore. Let these words inspire you as you continue on your path.
From his passionate struggle for justice and equality, Nelson Mandela left us a treasure of insight and wisdom. Through his powerful words, he has imparted valuable lessons about driving change, and here we reflect on some of them:
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.”
When you face immense challenges, take heart from this potent truth. Often, the biggest obstacles exist in our minds, the doubts and fears that hold us back. Mandela’s life showed us that we can defy the odds and achieve the seemingly impossible, and this quote encourages us to step forward and meet those challenges.
“What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead.”
Living is not about just existing or passing through. According to Mandela, our life’s worth is measured by the positive impact that we have on the lives of those around us. His profound words serve as a reminder that driving change starts with making a difference in the lives of others.
“There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.”
As Nelson Mandela pointedly expressed, how a society extends care, respect, and opportunities to its younger members reflects the core of its values, priorities, and integrity. As we sift through the corridors of Mandela’s thoughts, we come across potent examples of his deep wisdom and transformative vision.
Mandela himself was a testament to this, having spent 27 years in prison, only to emerge as the first black president of South Africa.
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” – Nelson Mandela
Imagine the strength of character it took to endure those years of confinement and yet remain unbroken. This quote encapsulates that very spirit of indomitable will and resilience.
For Nelson Mandela, unity was not merely a philosophy, but a way of life. His quotes often express his heartfelt belief in the power of togetherness, as symbolized in the following words:
“People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.” – Nelson Mandela
Hand in hand with his conviction in unity was Mandela’s undeniable belief in the inherent goodness of people. His words encourage us to tap into this reservoir of love and compassion within us. All it takes is a shift in perspective, suggests Mandela, to transform our world.
Mandela always encouraged proactive action in the journey towards change. Understanding the value of deeds over intentions, he said:
“Vision without action is just a dream, action without vision just passes the time, and vision with action can change the world.” – Nelson Mandela
This powerful quote is a call to embrace our power and capacity for creating change. By patiently and diligently working towards our goals, we are participating in the act of shaping our destinies.
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.”
Now this quote, by all means, is one of Mandela’s most impactful lines. It reminds us that tasks that seem insurmountable can indeed be accomplished. All it takes is the starting step. The journey may not be easy and may feel like an uphill task, but once we take that step, the impossible slowly starts appearing achievable, and before we know it, it’s already done.
Let’s not forget the times when we’ve been faced with a difficult task. Remember how we thought it was impossible? But we did it anyway. Because we realized, and quite succinctly put by Mandela, it only ‘seems’ impossible. We need to cultivate that mindset – the power of ‘doing’.
One truly inspiring sentiment Mandela often emphasized was the importance of persistence. He understood, better than most through some of his most encouraging quotes on persistence:
“Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell and got back up again.” This quote inspires us to view challenges as opportunities to rise above and become stronger.
“The greatest glory in living is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” Here Mandela is reminding us that it’s not about avoiding failure, but rather learning and growing from it.
Also read: 25 Most Inspiring Denzel Washington Quotes Ever
Indeed, the essence of Nelson Mandela’s perspective on persistence embodies the spirit of resilience and determination. It teaches us that setbacks can be seen as stepping stones rather than stumbling blocks. In other words, persistence isn’t just about working hard—it’s about refusing to quit even when the odds are against us.
With the capability to uplift the spirit and inspire hope, Nelson Mandela’s awe-inspiring words of encouragement are a powerhouse of motivation. Unravel a few chosen ones here:
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”
Through this enthralling quote, Nelson Mandela emphasizes the essence of never giving up. Even in the face of immense adversity, it is our ability to rise every time we stumble that defines our true character.
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.”
Here, Nelson Mandela promulgates the potential of human perseverance. What seems insurmountable at a glance can be conquered with unyielding determination, demonstrating that ‘impossible’ is actually ‘I’m possible’.
“Everyone can rise above their circumstances and achieve success if they are dedicated to and passionate about what they do.”
This remarkable quote motivates us to rise above our circumstances instead of being victimized by them. Mandela insists that with dedication and passion, one can align the odds in their favor and pave the path to success.
“Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.”
In this awe-inspiring saying, Mandela highlights the significance of resilience. Success isn’t measured by how high we rise, but by how often we break free from the shackles of failure and bounce back stronger. These unforgettable words are a beacon to uplift your spirits and fuel your journey towards growth and fulfillment.
It’s easy to feel daunted when faced with a big task or a profound shift in our lives. However, as Mandela so aptly expressed, our perceived impossibilities are often simply undiscovered possibilities waiting to unfold.
“There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.”
Mandela himself lived these words. He refused to settle for less, aspiring to achieve more than anyone thought possible. Let his wise words spur you on as you embrace change and transform the impossible into the possible.
“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.”
Here, Mandela underscores the tremendous power of knowledge. Education doesn’t only refer to formal schooling. It means staying curious, asking questions, seeking answers, and constantly learning and growing. Embrace change with the resolution to learn.
“Appearances matter — and remember to smile.”
Even when change is hard and times are tough, remember to put forth your best self. A simple act, like smiling, can help change your outlook on life and boost your resilience for the journey ahead.
In the face of change, both monumental and minuscule, let Mandela’s words inspire you to harness your inner strength, face your fears, and live the life you are capable of living.
Overcoming adversity seems to be an impossible task when we are stuck in despair, but it is exactly during these moments that we can draw strength from Nelson Mandela’s life and his empowering words. As someone who faced extreme difficulties in fighting for freedom and justice, Mandela’s quotes remind us that we hold the power to confront and overcome our challenges, however daunting they may be.
“Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.”
Each of these quotes carries a strong message of resilience, courage, and conviction. They not only inspire us to keep moving forward in the face of adversity but also encourage us to dream and aspire for the things that seem to be beyond reach.
“After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb.”
Lastly, Mandela’s insightful quote about human perseverance conveys that overcoming adversity is an ongoing process. It’s not about reaching a destination but enjoying the journey itself. Every hurdle crossed makes us stronger for the next challenge we face.
As you navigate life’s inevitable ups and downs, Nelson Mandela’s quotes about resilience can serve as a powerful reminder of your strength and tenacity. Known for his unwavering spirit and determination, Mandela faced 27 years of unjust imprisonment before his release and subsequent ascendance to the presidency of South Africa. His perseverance in surmounting unimaginable obstacles offers timely wisdom and inspiration for overcoming your challenges.
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”
How many times have you stumbled, fallen, or faced setbacks? Remember, each time you rise, you honor your indomitable spirit and tap into the resilience that resides within you.
“I am prepared to die if that’s what it takes for freedom for our people.”
It’s a stark embodiment of the power of resilience. Mandela was willing to sacrifice his life for the freedom of his people, underscoring the depth of his commitment.
“Our human compassion binds us to one another—not in pity or patronizingly, but as human beings who have learnt how to turn our common suffering into hope for the future.”
“A winner is a dreamer who never gives up.”
“In the end, reconciliation is a spiritual process, which requires more than just a legal framework. It has to happen in the hearts and minds of the people.”
By heeding Mandela’s words and reflecting on his struggle, you can find the resilience within yourself to overcome life’s challenges and flourish in the face of adversity.
Remember, it takes a certain resilience to transform setbacks into victories and hardships into gifts. The golden words of Nelson Mandela serve as an eternal guiding beacon to light that path.
Humanity’s richness lies in its diversity, a reality well-understood and advocated by Nelson Mandela. With grace and wisdom, Mandela’s words still echo, reminding us of the necessity for equality and inclusion in today’s world. Let’s dive into some of his powerful quotes on this crucial topic.
“No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.”
In these poignant words, Mandela points out the power of love to overcome hate and prejudice. Prejudice, he believed, is not an innate human quality, but rather a learned behavior. And what can be learned can be unlearned.
“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”
Mandela’s concept of freedom does not stop at individual liberty. According to him, true freedom also encompasses the rights of others, demonstrating a compelling call to inclusivity and respect for all.
“I have cherished the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and with equal opportunities. It is an ideal which I hope to live for and to achieve. But if needs be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die.”
Indeed, the quest for equality and inclusion is not a simple walk in the park. Mandela knew this well and was ready to sacrifice everything for it. His courage and determination to establish a harmonious society make us reflect on our duties as citizens of the world.
Reflecting on these sayings, may you be encouraged to embrace diversity, promote equality, and champion inclusion in your daily lives. In the same vein as Nelson Mandela, your actions, no matter how small they might seem, can make a significant difference in this world.
Leadership – a concept so vast, yet often misunderstood. Nelson Mandela, one of the most significant leaders of our time, understood this concept in its truest essence. Not only did he inspire millions with his persona, but he also left behind pearls of wisdom that serve as invaluable guides for aspiring leaders. Below are some of his highly influential quotes on leadership:
What makes these quotes special is not their inherent wisdom, but the fact that Nelson Mandela lived by them. He was a leader who practiced what he preached, and that made his words all the more impactful. But what’s even more important is how these quotes can shape your perspective. They remind us that:
So, as you deal with your leadership challenges, remember these words by Mandela – and let them guide you towards being an effective and compassionate leader.
Nelson Mandela, a name that epitomizes forgiveness and reconciliation in the face of dire situations. His words often remind us that to find peace within ourselves, we must be willing to forgive, not for the sake of others, but for our tranquility. Here, we delve into some of his most inspiring quotes about forgiveness:
“Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.”
Quite vividly, this quote illustrates Mandela’s perspective on holding onto resentment. Instead of harming those who have wronged us, we only poison our hearts and minds. It’s in our best interest to let go and forgive because, in the end, our mental well-being should be our priority.
“If there are dreams about a beautiful South Africa, there are also roads that lead to their goal. Two of these roads could be named Goodness and Forgiveness.”
Through this statement, Mandela conveys that forgiveness is not a mere act; it’s a substantial pathway leading to peace and harmony. It’s like a crucial societal roadmap to make this world indeed a beautiful place.
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.”
In Mandela’s view, forgiveness isn’t a sign of weakness. On the contrary, it’s a potent tool that liberates the soul, removes fear, and grants us the courage to move forward with our lives. Forgiving is an act of strength, a testament to the indomitable spirit of humanity.
“Courageous people do not fear forgiving, for the sake of peace.”
“As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison.”
In conclusion, Nelson Mandela’s quotes on forgiveness offer a profound understanding of the power of letting go of resentment. His wisdom encourages us to look beyond the pain, and the injustice, and find the strength to forgive, not for others, but for us. There is courage, strength, and peace in forgiveness and these lessons from Mandela are indeed timeless.
When you think of education, you might think about school, teachers, and tests, right? Yet for Mandela, education was more than just formal schooling; it was a fundamental force, a tool necessary for personal and societal advancement. Here are some enlightening quotes from Mandela that highlight his immense value for education and learning.
“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.”
This quote often attributed to Nelson Mandela emphasizes how he perceived education as more than just a process of acquiring knowledge. He saw it as a powerful tool that cements the foundation for creating a just and equal society and allows individuals to secure their future.
“It is through education that the daughter of a peasant can become a doctor, that the son of a mineworker can become the head of the mine, that a child of farm workers can become the president of a great nation.”
In this expression, Mandela illustrates the transformative power of education. Regardless of your beginnings, education is the elevator to achieving potential and soaring to great heights. It’s a reminder that we should not underestimate the power of learning, regardless of our origins.
“No country can really develop unless its citizens are educated.”
With this quote, Mandela underscores that an educated populace is the backbone of a nation’s development. It’s a powerful reminder for all nations striving to achieve social and economic prosperity.
We hope these quotes highlight why Mandela held such high regard for education and inspire you to not only respect but also seek your continual growth and learning.
Making a difference in the world was at the heart of Nelson Mandela’s purpose. His words reflected his vision for a better, more just society, and his hope for individuals to take positive actions. Here, we take a look at some of Mandela’s inspiring quotes centered around purpose and making a difference.
“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”
Through these words, Mandela conveys the strong sentiment that liberation is not solely about liberating oneself, but also ensuring the welfare of others. Your freedom should not pose a barrier to others. Rather, it should facilitate their quest for freedom. This is the essence of making a genuine difference.
“A fundamental concern for others in our individual and community lives would go a long way in making the world the better place we so passionately dreamt of.”
Here, Mandela emphasizes the importance of empathy and compassion by stating that caring about others and taking action can bring about transformative changes for the betterment of society. Only when we place concern for others at the core of our individual and community lives can we truly make the world a better place?
“Sometimes, it falls upon a generation to be great. You can be that great generation. Let your greatness blossom.”
In this quote, Mandela encourages us to rise to the challenge and become a great generation that drives positive change. With his inspiring words, he ignites a spark in each of us to strive for greatness and to let that inner greatness blossom – for when it does, we can make a significant difference.
“What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead.”
This quote epitomizes Mandela’s ethos. Life, to him, was not merely about living, but about the impact we create during our time on earth. It is the change we bring to others’ lives – through compassion, understanding, and action – that truly determines our life’s significance.
These precious insights from Nelson Mandela serve to remind us that our actions can contribute to a wider societal change. So, let Mandela’s words permeate your thoughts. Act with purpose and strive to make a difference, because every action counts, and every individual can make a world of difference. Embrace your journey and let your impact be felt by others as you live your life with purpose.
Stepping beyond the customary sphere of thought, Nelson Mandela, a beacon of inspiration, challenges us to rethink the notions of justice, freedom, and equality. His words resonate with the profound truths that touch every aspect of human life. Dive into some of his most empowering quotes that speak about these pertinent topics.
“To deny people their human rights is to challenge their very humanity.”
Equality starts with recognizing and respecting human rights. Mandela reminds us to stand against any injustice that challenges the inherent humaneness within each of us.
“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”
Freedom, as Mandela iterates, doesn’t imply just personal liberation. It resonates with the collective liberty, where we respect and enhance the freedom of others, signifying the true essence of being free.
“Social equality is the only basis of human happiness.”
Stressing the importance of social equality, Mandela lays out a blueprint for the essential requirement for human happiness. The path to genuine happiness is through treating everyone alike, irrespective of their differences.
“Where globalization means, as it so often does, that the rich and powerful now have new means to further enrich and empower themselves at the cost of the poorer and weaker, we have a responsibility to protest in the name of universal freedom.”
Here, Mandela prompts us to raise voices against the disparities propagated by globalization. In the fight for universal freedom, we must stand against those who use their power for personal benefits at the expense of the less fortunate.
These inspiring quotes from Nelson Mandela urge us to introspect our perspective on equality, justice, and freedom. They incite courage within us to act against the inequalities prevailing in our society and strive for a world where justice and freedom are universally accessible.
Below are some of the most frequently asked questions about Nelson Mandela’s quotes and the profound wisdom they carry. Let’s dive deep into the values and insights that lay beneath his words.
Through his quotes, Nelson Mandela conveyed potent messages of resilience, justice, equality, and peace. His wise words encouraged us to endure despite adversity, stand up against injustice, promote equality for all, and foster peace within ourselves and in our communities.
Nelson Mandela’s quotes are a treasure trove of wisdom for those seeking inspiration. His lessons on humility, resilience, courage, and perseverance serve as motivation for overcoming challenges. His insightful words foster a determination to strive for a more equitable and peaceful world.
In an era where social justice, equality, and human rights are at the forefront of global conversation, Nelson Mandela’s quotes are more relevant than ever. They remind us of the importance of standing firm in our beliefs, pushing for positive change, and continuously striving for a more just and equal society.
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” – Nelson Mandela
This quote encapsulates Mandela’s spirit of resilience and fearlessness in the face of adversity. His life exemplified the doctrine that failure is not the end, instead, it is a stepping stone to success.
Undeniably yes! The enduring wisdom found in Nelson Mandela’s quotes is applicable to all aspects of life. Whether it be standing up for what’s right, showing courage in crisis, maintaining discipline, or fostering love and peace, his words continue to guide us as we navigate through life’s complexities.
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Anthony C. Ejiogu
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Goth fashion isn’t new, but fashion associated with the vampire scene has seen a resurgence as the vampire has once again grown in popularity through the success of the 2022 adaptation of Anne Rice’s Interview with the Vampire, as well as the Castlevania franchise seeing a resurgence with its Netflix series. Once again, the vampire has permeated the mainstream, sinking its fangs into an entirely new generation, coupled with an interest in historical fashion and what this timeless creature has come to represent. In the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic, sometime in 2021, while cleaning out my wardrobe, I decided to dress like I could fit into one of Koji Igarashi’s Castlevania games.
The look of the vampire is ageless but hard to define. It exists somewhere between Victorian fashion and goth subculture, and has morphed into different subsets and microtrends over the past few decades. It can be black frocks or Tom Cruise’s frilled shirts and brocade vests in 1994’s Interview with the Vampire. It could be one of Ayami Kojima’s gorgeous oil painting illustrations of Alucard and various Belmont family members from the Castlevania series.
It was my interest in period fashion and various subcultures that brought me to dress like a Castlevania vampire for a year. (That and having disposable income as an adult.) Would I have dressed this way as a teenager? Probably. The modern vampire has often been associated with androgyny, and it’s something I’ve always personally gravitated toward. Naturally, there are also some subsets to this. There is the more industrial goth that is sometimes blended with mid-’80s aesthetics, extremely heavy makeup and all, or the “romantic” goth associated with ruffled shirts, corsets, and modified pieces of Victorian clothing.
The vampire is associated with so many various interpretations that it’s hard to pin down just what exactly defines it — outside of fangs, odd-colored eyes, and a penchant for the night. (I didn’t end up ordering a pair of fangs — I’m a little too self-conscious about my teeth — but someone else I know wears their pair almost religiously.)
Photo courtesy of Kazuma Hashimoto
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Photo courtesy of Kazuma Hashimoto
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Image: Konami
I scoured the internet for sellers that would provide exactly what I was looking for: linen shirts with ruffles, tightly-laced corsets, leather trousers, knee-high boots, everything I associated with the gorgeous Gothic designs Kojima incorporated in art of characters like Alucard and Mathias Cronqvist, and in one-off illustrations she’s done that feature these ephemeral creatures. I packed my closet with velvet capelets from Dark in Love, scoured secondhand shops for antique Victorian brooches and silk ribbons I would tie my then-shoulder-length hair with. To cement the vampire image, I ordered matte black lipstick to use exclusively on my upper lip, in combination with full-coverage foundation to get that perfectly flawless countenance coined as “vampire skin,” which appeared as a full-blown trend in 2022. Naturally, I also wore colored contacts and heavy eyeliner to further accentuate the look.
I felt great assembling these outfits, spending the time to practice and perfectly apply my makeup, and walking around in clothing that made me feel extremely comfortable. I would get stopped from time to time by random passersby, but since Germany has a history of a thriving goth subculture and scene, I never received any disparaging remarks. It was all compliments, which further cemented my confidence in walking around dressed to the nines, inspired by one of my favorite artists and game series of all time.
Many others are drawn to the way the vampire aesthetic lets self-expression and various interests converge. “Being into Victorian fashion, architecture, and even smaller subcultures like Visual Kei when I was a teenager was sort of how I got my start into vampire fashion,” said Storm, a former member of the fang community (slang for vampire communities, or in some cases even clans) when asked about what drew them to the subculture. “My interests in fashion and subculture merged with my nerdiness when I discovered the game Vampire: The Masquerade.”
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Photo courtesy of Kazuma Hashimoto
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Photo courtesy of Kazuma Hashimoto
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Image: Konami
Don Henrie, “The Human Vampire,” was a popular internet personality in the early 2000s, and was even featured in a National Geographic program and appeared on SyFy’s Mad Mad House. He was one of the first glimpses into what bridging the vampire lifestyle and fashion movement was like during that era. There was also the (moderate) success of Queen of the Damned, Van Helsing, and Underworld roughly around the same time. The website VampireFreaks began in 1999, functioning as a MySpace for goths; it still exists today, now as an online shop that sells goth-related apparel and goods.
This style of fashion has also created a community. “I ended up becoming part of an online community in the early 2000s, which was super into all of the Vampire: The Masquerade clans. It’s actually how a lot of ‘vampire clans’ in the physical world formed,” Storm said. One of the more popular “vampire clans” was featured on Buzzfeed in 2018, where host Selom received her own pair of vampire fangs. Vampire fangs can definitely be a fashion statement; I know a few people who wear them without joining a clan, as they’ve become more accessible through sellers like Kaos Kustom Fangs. But for clan members, it’s more or less a lifestyle they subscribe to. I never joined a clan myself, and only learned the inner workings of them through friends who had participated in the culture, but living in a major metropolitan city meant that I definitely wasn’t alone in dressing outside of the norm. I was friends with former cyber goths, and while they had more or less toned down their looks, they still dressed in mostly all black and gravitated toward voluminous black dresses with heeled boots.
Having orbited those circles and now seeing the resurgence of vampire media, it feels like the scene is in the middle of an upswing. Would I dress like a “vampire” again? The answer is maybe, mostly because where I live now doesn’t accommodate it all that well. (Wearing black velvet in sweltering summer heat doesn’t bode well for anyone.) But it was definitely one of my favorite periods of personal fashion, and a fulfilling period of self-expression. So maybe I’ll throw everything together for a night at the club. Regardless, it’s great to see this subset of goth subculture still alive and well.
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Kazuma Hashimoto
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For some people, retirement is a long-awaited chance to sleep late, relax and celebrate the joys of life without pressure or deadlines.
For others, it’s an opportunity to finally get to work.
Within a span of a few days, I heard about two retirees who had long dreamed of becoming authors, but their jobs kept getting in the way. Then they pulled the cord, hit the keyboard and never looked back.
I was on the phone one day with former L.A. Times columnist and editor Bill Boyarsky, and when I asked about his wife, Nancy, he gloated. Her seventh novel had just been published, he said, and she was already working on her eighth.
Then I heard from L.A. County Superior Court Judge Kelvin Filer, who was talking up his brother, Duane. “He actually wrote a book documenting his first year of retirement,” the judge said. Before he excused himself with “I have to get back to my murder trial,” he added that his brother has since written several other books.
I hear fairly often from people who use retirement to chase dreams. Some set out to learn an instrument or a new language or two. Others turn volunteering into second careers. But I probably hear from more aspiring writers than any other group of people setting out to reinvent themselves.
In her writing room, Nancy Boyarsky is surrounded by her own paintings.
(Al Seib / For The Times)
So I paid visits first to Nancy Boyarsky, 87, who lives in West L.A., and then to Duane Lance Filer, 71, who lives in Carson.
Boyarsky toils in a back room drenched in natural light, her cat Roxy at her side. She was a reader as a child and a fan of Jane Austen. At UC Berkeley, she took a creative writing class, “but the teacher didn’t think much of my short stories.” She recalls “a condescending smile” and a stabbing suggestion that the writing life was not for her.
And yet she went on to make a living at a typewriter, banging out articles for various publications including the L.A. Times magazine, and she was an editor for a magazine called “L.A. Lawyer. She co-authored a book called “Backroom Politics” with Bill and spent the last 18 years of her career as ARCO’s director of communications for political affairs.
While still at ARCO, Boyarsky took some writing courses at UCLA and began working on a novel called “The Swap.” The protagonist is a Los Angeles housewife who discovers on a trip to England that her husband is a cheat and that her life is in danger, a realization that transforms the “browbeaten housewife” into an enterprising private detective.
A small publishing house called Light Messages reached out to Nancy Boyarsky, saying it wanted to re-publish “The Swap” and asking the writer if she could turn her heroine into a serial sleuth.
(Al Seib / For The Times)
But when Boyarsky retired in 1998, she discovered, as so many writers have, that getting a book published is a tough racket, with your odds of success roughly similar to your chance of winning the Powerball lottery.
“I got an agent, and he sent it out to publishers, and they rejected it,” Boyarsky said.
A freelance editor suggested a major rewrite. Boyarsky did not agree, and she kept pursuing agents and publishers without success before putting the dream in a drawer and taking up painting. Her house is filled with her work, including impressive portraits and botanical art.
But Boyarsky hadn’t entirely given up. In 2013, she took advantage of a growing trend and self-published on Amazon.
“Mary Higgins Clark meets London … ’The Swap’ contributes to the women-driven mystery field with panache,” one magazine critic raved.
“I was thrilled,” Boyarsky said, and the news got better.
A small North Carolina publishing house called Light Messages reached out to say it wanted to re-publish “The Swap,” and Boyarsky was asked if she could turn her heroine into a serial sleuth. Seven Nicole Graves mysteries are now in print, and Boyarsky is hammering out the eighth while Bill, also a prolific author, works in another room on his next book.
Light Messages edits, designs, distributes and markets the Nicole Graves books on a small budget, with Boyarsky getting a percentage of sales. (“The Swap” has more than 2,000 customer reviews and a four-star rating on Amazon.) Boyarsky said she made several thousand dollars on that one, less on the others, and she wouldn’t advise book-writing for anyone looking to get rich.
But clearly, that Berkeley professor was clueless, and Boyarsky keeps writing — for love, if not for money.
Duane Lance Filer, 71, sits in the room he calls the “fffunk Lab,” where he has written nine novels. Images of Miles Davis, Jimi Hendrix and Sly and the Family Stone inspire him.
(Genaro Molina / Los Angeles Times)
Duane Lance Filer had a bit of a different start. Rather than being told the writing game wasn’t for him, he got nothing but encouragement from his Black history teacher at Compton High School.
“Mr. Taylor,” Filer said. “Alvin Taylor. He said, ‘Pursue your dreams.’”
With that, and inspiration from the civil rights activism of his parents — Maxcy and Blondell Filer— Filer majored in political science at Cal Lutheran and wrote short stories there, joining the Watts Writers Workshop after college. Like a majority of aspiring writers, Filer had a day job, and for the last 29 years of his working life he was in the consumer affairs division of the California Public Utilities Commission, handling customer complaints.
After retiring in 2013, Duane Lance Filer spent a year writing a breezy book called “The Baby Boomers First-Hand, First-Year Guide to Retirement.”
(Genaro Molina / Los Angeles Times)
Toward the end of that career he wrote his first book, a semi-autobiographical novel about an aspiring young Black writer growing up in a changing Compton, a witness to white flight during the civil rights movement. Then, after retiring in 2013, he spent a year writing a breezy book called “The Baby Boomers First-Hand, First-Year Guide to Retirement.”
Filer didn’t miss the train rides to and from work. There was lots of vacuuming and cleaning to be done, and he often shopped and prepared dinner for his wife, who was still working. There were some ups and some downs, but no regrets about retiring. On Day 365, Filer entered his writing den — he calls it the fffunklab; the three Fs stand for “Filer Family Fun”—to pen the final words of his guide while listening to Etta James sing “At Last.”
The fffunk lab, by the way, is where I visited Filer. He’s carved out the space in a corner of the garage, with images of Miles Davis, Jimi Hendrix and Sly and the Family Stone surrounding him. He wore faded, patched jeans and a George Clinton Funkadelic T-shirt, calling himself an unreformed hippie. In a family of lawyers and educators — son Lance is an attorney, daughter Arinn is an assistant principal, wife Janice is a professor and retired principal — Filer is all about music (he plays bass guitar), art (he paints), and words.
A portrait of Duke Ellington rests behind a Stratocaster guitar in Duane Lance Filer’s writing den.
(Genaro Molina / Los Angeles Times)
The fffunk lab is a supremely cluttered cave of sports and family memorabilia, along with the tributes to his favorite musicians. The desktop computer, on which the funkmaster has now written nine books, sits in one corner. He’s penned several children’s books and a novella called “The Legend of Diddley Squatt,” loosely inspired by the life of the late comedian Richard Pryor, who grew up in a brothel. Filer is now working on a sequel, his 10th book, and a screenplay about his father’s life.
The only fly in the punch bowl is that despite his dogged efforts, Filer has no agent and no traditional publisher. He has self-published, paying different companies to print and distribute his books, hoping to recover the investment through sales.
“I usually send out between 50 and 100 query letters with each book,” Filer said.
The lack of response has not deterred him one iota. He sat in on some writing classes at nearby Cal State Dominguez Hills several years ago and keeps the dream alive, noting that his father took the state bar exam over and over again — literally dozens of times — before finally passing.
Perseverance, he tells himself. Perseverance.
After retiring from the California Public Utilities Commission in 2013, Duane Filer decided to start writing books. He is currently finishing his 10th.
(Genaro Molina / Los Angeles Times)
He takes his morning walk while listening to his favorite music, reaching deep for inspiration. Then he enters the fffunklab, subjecting himself to the joys and cruelties of creative endeavor.
“I love to write, and here’s the thing: None of my books make any money, or, I haven’t made a lot of money,” Filer said. “But I don’t care. At some point, my little grandson can say, ‘Oh, you never gave up.’ I will never stop writing. … I think this next book is going to be my best one.”
steve.lopez@latimes.com
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Steve Lopez
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Taraji P. Henson is an American actress. She majored in acting at Howard University and graduated as a single mother and eventually moved to LA to begin her Hollywood career.
Taraji founded a nonprofit organization, the Boris Laurence Henson Foundation which was named after her father who suffered from PTSD. The foundation was created as a forum for blacks to talk about their mental health issues.
Taraji is an inspiration to men and women out there that no matter the situation, they can do whatever they set their minds to. Here are some of her inspiring quotes.
“Love is the greatest gift that God has given us. It’s free.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I had a passion, I had a dream and I [dove] in and I went for my dream.”― Taraji P. Henson
“I don’t harp on the negative because if you do, then there’s no progression. There’s no forward movement. You got to always look on the bright side of things..” ― Taraji P. Henson
“Humans have a light side and a dark side, and it’s up to us to choose which way we’re going to live our lives. Even if you start out on the dark side, it doesn’t mean you have to continue your journey that way. You always have time to turn it around.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“It’s up to you to be responsible for how you feel if you’re not happy. Your happiness lies in your hands. You can’t rely on a man to make you happy or complete you. That starts with you.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“I’m always interested in challenging myself and pushing, and seeing how far I can go.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“I didn’t hear the naysayers when they were like, ‘You’re too old to go to California, if you don’t hit by 25, you’re not going to make it.’ I will be 46 this year. I am just touching the surface. I am just getting started.” ― Taraji P. Henson
Check out: 15 Most Powerful & Inspiring Quotes On Expectations
“At the end of the day, I stand by who I am. I’m a good person.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“What if I believed those people who told me that when I became pregnant in college that I wouldn’t finish? I walked across that stage with my son on my hip and I collected my degree.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“If you listen to people and you allow people to project their fears onto you, you won’t live.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“My first big heartbreak proved to me that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“Don’t you ever dim your light to make someone else feel comfortable. God gave you that light to share with the world. If someone can’t take your brightness, politely hand them a pair of fabulous shades, and wish them well on their journey. More importantly, pray that they tap into the light God gave them.”― Taraji P. Henson
Also read: Top 40 P. Diddy Quotes To Help You Be Rich
“I felt compelled to jump into action. You know they say it’s easy to sit around and complain, but you have to be the change you want to see.”― Taraji P. Henson
“What gives me the greatest satisfaction is the number of people I can affect with my gift, with what I do. That’s the most important thing to me, more important than any trophy or award.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“I know what I want. He knows what he wants. Age really doesn’t matter. It’s experiences, in life that will age you.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“Every human walks around with a certain kind of sadness. They may not wear it on their sleeves, but it’s there if you look deep.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“My father always told me, ‘If you are blessed, then it’s your job to go out to the world and bless someone else. If I have everything, what is everything if I can’t share it? People make the world go ’round. We need each other.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“I’m nothing without God.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“I try and look at myself as a comedian. I laugh at myself a lot and I don’t take myself too personally and I will beat you to the punch about myself before you can.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“Money doesn’t make it all go away. Money fixes nothing. I know people who are filthy rich, and who are the most miserable people in the world.” ― Taraji P. Henson
Also read: Top 35 Inspiring Quotes On Being A Person of Courage
“Body diversity, it’s very important, because that’s where shame comes in. That’s where you feel like, ‘Well, I don’t fit because I look a certain way. Well, you look a certain way because God made you and you’re perfect,” ― Taraji P. Henson
“No matter how often you fall from grace, what matters most is how many times you get up.”― Taraji P. Henson
“The grace and understanding for the familial choices of married women is a given. The humanity of single moms comes with asterisks, ridicule, and judgmental questions.” ― Taraji P. Henson
“When I meet a person and that chemistry is there, I cannot hide the electricity. I need to learn more about him, and once I feel safe, I’m gone, I’m in love, and I give it my all!”― Taraji P. Henson
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Stella Maris
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As we advance in life we make all these great plans and goals but when we start working towards those goals, we realize that it’s not as easy as we thought it would be. Good things in life never come easy and we must persevere in the pursuit of a better life.
You may be really close to giving up because doors keep getting closed on you. In such times you must persevere because you’ll never know which door will open wide for you. May these quotes inspire you to keep pushing towards your goals.
“Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.”– Dennis P. Kimbro
“There is no royal road to anything. One thing at a time, all things in succession. That which grows fast, withers as rapidly. That which grows slowly, endures.”– Josiah Gilbert Holland
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“Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.”– William James
“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me.”– Erma Bombeck
“When I hear somebody sigh, ‘Life is hard,’ I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’”– Sydney Harris
“Nurture your mind with great thoughts. To believe in the heroic makes heroes.”– Benjamin Disraeli
“The real opportunity for success lies within the person and not in the job.” – Zig Ziglar
“Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get.”– Ray Kroc
“Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.”– Will Rogers
“Courage is the first of human qualities because it is the quality which guarantees all others.”– Winston Churchill
“Whoever loves much, performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well.” – Vincent Van Gogh
“The great thing in this world is not so much where you stand, as in what direction you are moving.”– Oliver Wendell Holmes
“Every truth passes through three stages before it is recognized. In the first, it is ridiculed. In the second, it is opposed. In the third, it is regarded as self-evident.”– Arthur Schopenhauer
“Either you run the day, or the day runs you.” – Jim Rohn
Also Read – Top 30 Quotes That Inspires The Artist In You
“The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength not a lack of knowledge but rather a lack of will.”– Vince Lombardi
“If not us, who? If not now, when?”– John F. Kennedy
“Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.”– Jack Canfield
“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.”– Carl Bard
“Some men see things as they are and say why – I dream things that never were and say why not.”– George Bernard Shaw
“Life has two rules: #1 Never quit #2 Always remember rule # 1.” – Unknown
“The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible.”– Arthur C. Clarke
“Speak less than you know; have more than you show.”– William Shakespeare
“Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”– Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Many of life’s failures are experienced by people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” – Thomas Edison
“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”– Lao Tzu
“Every noble work is at first impossible.”– Thomas Carlyle
“Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do.”– John Wooden
“Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don’t have a plan.”– Larry Winget
“Defeat is not bitter unless you swallow it.” – Joe Clark
“It is not enough to aim, you must hit.”– Italian Proverb
“Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” – Joshua J. Marine
“Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.”– Babe Ruth
“An obstacle is often a stepping stone.”– Prescott
“I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.”– Stephen Covey
“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.”– Martin Luther King Jr.
“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great makes you feel that you, too, can become great.” – Mark Twain
“Eighty percent of success is showing up.”– Woody Allen
“I am thankful for all of those who said NO to me. It’s because of them I’m doing it myself.”– Albert Einstein
“The mind is everything. What you think you become.” – Buddha
Top 25 Martha Stewart Quotes To Inspire The Entrepreneur In You
“We become what we think about.”– Earl Nightingale
I hope you enjoyed these quotes. I would love to know which of these inspired you.
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Anthony C. Ejiogu
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Walter Elias Disney was an American entrepreneur. He was a terrific animator, writer, producer, and voice actor. Before his success, he felt countless failures and setbacks. At age 22, Walt Disney was fired from a Missouri newspaper for “not being creative enough.” One of his early ventures, called Laugh-o-gram Studios, went bankrupt.
The creator of Mickey and Minnie Mouse went on to be nominated for 59 Academy Awards, winning 32, all for his unparalleled animations. He still holds the record for the most Oscars won by an individual, according to WaltDisney.com.
Disney was interested in drawing at an early age. He joined art classes and was employed as a commercial illustrator at the age of 18. He set up the Disney Brothers Studio with his brother Roy in the 1920s. His Major success was creating the Mickey mouse character. With time the studio grew tremendously and became more adventurous and developed.
Disney also created his own amusement park in the 1950s which he called ‘Disney world’. Although he passed away before it was completed, Disney was an introverted, self-deprecating, and insecure man in private but in public, he adopted a warm and outgoing personality.
He had high standards and his namesake studio and company continue to maintain their standard in popular entertainment. The Disney amusement parks have enhanced in size and have attracted visitors from several countries.
Disney had a dream and he pursued that dream regardless of the failures he encountered along the way. Even after his death, his dream has continued to grow. Walt Disney is remembered for his many successes – for Mickey Mouse, for Donald Duck, for Disneyland. I hope his quotes encourage you to pursue your dreams.
“You can’t just let nature run wild.” – Walt Disney
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“When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable.” – Walt Disney
“The more you like yourself, the less you are like anyone else, which makes you unique.” – Walt Disney
“Disneyland is a work of love. We didn’t go into Disneyland just with the idea of making money.” – Walt Disney
“When you’re curious, you find lots of interesting things to do. And one thing it takes to accomplish something is courage.” – Walt Disney
“Somehow I can’t believe there are any heights that can’t be scaled by a man who knows the secret of making dreams come true. This special secret, it seems to me, can be summarized in four C’s. They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy and the greatest of these is Confidence. When you believe a thing, believe it all the way, implicitly and unquestionably.” – Walt Disney
“We allow no geniuses around our Studio.” – Walt Disney
“If you can dream it, you can do it.” – Walt Disney
“I do not like to repeat successes, I like to go on to other things.” – Walt Disney
“All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” – Walt Disney
“He popped out of my mind onto a drawing pad 20 years ago on a train ride from Manhattan to Hollywood at a time when business fortunes of my brother Roy and myself were at lowest ebb and disaster seemed right around the corner.” – Walt Disney
“I always like to look on the optimistic side of life, but I am realistic enough to know that life is a complex matter.” – Walt Disney
“I am interested in entertaining people, in bringing pleasure, particularly laughter, to others, rather than being concerned with ‘expressing’ myself with obscure creative impressions.” – Walt Disney
“I would rather entertain and hope that people learned something than educate people and hope they were entertained.” – Walt Disney
“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.” – Walt Disney
“You can design and create, and build the most wonderful place in the world. But it takes people to make the dream a reality.” – Walt Disney
“Movies can and do have tremendous influence in shaping young lives in the realm of entertainment towards the ideals and objectives of normal adulthood.” – Walt Disney
“I am not influenced by the techniques or fashions of any other motion picture company.” – Walt Disney
“Whenever I go on a ride, I’m always thinking of what’s wrong with the thing and how it can be improved.” – Walt Disney
“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.” – Walt Disney
“People still think of me as a cartoonist, but the only thing I lift a pen or pencil for these days is to sign a contract, a check, or an autograph.” – Walt Disney
“The era we are living in today is a dream of coming true.” – Walt Disney
“You reach a point where you don’t work for money.” – Walt Disney
“Of all the things I’ve done, the most vital is coordinating those who work with me and aiming their efforts at a certain goal.” – Walt Disney
“I only hope that we don’t lose sight of one thing – that it was all started by a mouse.” – Walt Disney
“Of all of our inventions for mass communication, pictures still speak the most universally understood language.” – Walt Disney
“Adults are interested if you don’t play down to the little 2 or 3 year olds or talk down. I don’t believe in talking down to children. I don’t believe in talking down to any certain segment. I like to kind of just talk in a general way to the audience. Children are always reaching.” – Walt Disney
“A man should never neglect his family for business.” – Walt Disney
“There is more treasure n books than in all the pirates’ loot on Treasure Island and at the bottom of the Spanish Main … and best of all, you can enjoy these riches every day of your life.” – Walt Disney
“Your dead if you aim only for kids. Adults are only kids grown up, anyway.” – Walt Disney
“Or heritage and ideals, our code and standards – the things we live by and teach our children – are preserved or diminished by how freely we exchange ideas and feelings.” – Walt Disney
“All your dreams can come true if you have the courage to pursue them” – Walt Disney
“I have been up against tough competition all my life. I wouldn’t know how to get along without it.” – Walt Disney
“Crowded classrooms and half-day sessions are a tragic waste of our greatest national resource – the minds of our children.” – Walt Disney
“Disneyland will never be completed. It will continue to grow as long as there is imagination left in the world.” – Walt Disney Quotes
“When we consider a project, we really study it–not just the surface idea, but everything about it. And when we go into that new project, we believe in it all the way. We have confidence in our ability to do it right. And we work hard to do the best possible job.” – Walt Disney
“I’d say it’s been my biggest problem all my life… it’s money. It takes a lot of money to make these dreams come true.” – Walt Disney
“I believe in being a motivator.” – Walt Disney Quotes
“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.” – Walt Disney
“There is great comfort and inspiration in the feeling of close human relationships and its bearing on our mutual fortunes – a powerful force, to overcome the “tough breaks” which are certain to come to most of us from time to time” – Walt Disney
Get more inspiring quotes; Celebrity Quotes
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Anthony C. Ejiogu
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I know a man, whose name I wish not to mention. But whose story I have heard countless times and have wondered, “how did he make it?” To say that there is a man whose countenance roars from within him like a lion is but an understatement. His beginning was that of a bit of misfortune for his family. He was named after his father, an Igbo man would say “Oyiri nna ya”. It is said that on the day he was born, his father’s shop where he made solid income, burned to the ground. His goods and fame went along into the ashes, never to be heard of again. Oyiri nna ya began life with little food to his stomach as his mother did all she could to sustain herself and the newborn. He wasn’t the first, he wasn’t the second.
He came as the third born, and he looked just like his mother’s father. What a surprise! Growing up wasn’t easy as other siblings came along and the need to select who would go to school began. “Oyiri nna ya, you have to wait for some time for your older ones to go to school.” Years went by and the story changed “Oyiri nna ya, your younger ones are already progressing and you need to take care of them”. Ha! When would he start schooling himself? He decided he was going to take a step and leave the comfort of his home, in search of education and some sense to have as a grown man.
By that time it was obvious that he was one of the eldest in class. He had begun to stay with an uncle, whose wife did not extend the kind of motherly affection to him. Yet he endured. The soup she would cook would be the soup of several days which he and some other young chaps would eat – it was never the fresh soup. He became used to her pattern and was blessed with a younger relative who loved him as her own child. To him, this was comfort and a way to learn all he could about life. When he started to go to Secondary school, this special aunty was there to encourage him to save up money for his WAEC.
Even while in school, he struggled to read and understand as his Primary school days were nothing to write home about. He saw he was deteriorating, and wouldn’t be able to amount to anything in life. So he had to change his thinking pattern. Before, while in class, he would sit at the very back with all the other bench warmers who couldn’t care less about learning. Then one-day Oyiri nna ya said to himself, that he too could become like one of those girls who took the First position in the class. He made a bold step one fateful day to sit at the very front of the class so he could pay attention.
The entire strata of students were so disorganized by this new arrangement that another guy took the bold step of moving to the front seat! And so, friendship like no other began. Seriousness began. He was even liked and admired by most teachers, trusted even to handle financial contributions by his peers. Oyiri nna ya became a pacesetter. Something, he never thought he could do had he not had encouragement at home and within himself.
Fast forward to the end of his Secondary school days and he needed money to register for his WAEC. Of course, senior aunty and uncle refused to help him even after seven years of living with them. It was at this point that he left the home he had known for years with nothing to call his own but the savings he managed to raise with his aunty. Rather than him going home feeling dejected, he bought gifts for the children around his uncle’s home and shared with them. They were overjoyed and prayed for him, even going the extra mile to escort him as far as they could. His hopes grew and he completed his Jamb.
He made a single prayer and said something like this “Oh Lord, Abia State University is my first choice. If I do not get it, then I am done with school”. He applied and when admission lists began to roll out, lo and behold he made it! What a surprise to his family! He had finally made it! He would shuffle from his hometown to school after performing some menial jobs with the help of his mother who gave foodstuff for school. Never did he miss his exams.
And in the year 20…yeah! He bagged his certificate! Looking back at his journey he would tell me, Ngee I really suffered in life. And I would tell him congratulations, you are indeed a victor. You just cannot give up in life when God has not thrown in the towel. Where there is life, there is hope. Only but begin, take a step even if it is one done with trembling. Believe and the universe will respond to your actions. Oyiri nna ya is an example of a victor.
Don’t let what others have determined about your future be the final say. Play that ball! And make sure you score in life’s net of “no’s and you can’t”. It only takes determination and a brave heart to soar.
Ngozichi Atasie is a Mass Communication major at the Abia State University, Uturu.
Read more on Story 9 – His Father’s Namesake(Oyiri nna ya)
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Martha Helen Stewart is an American businesswoman, writer, former model, television personality, and a convicted felon. She gained success through several business ventures, including publishing, broadcasting, merchandising, and even e-commerce. She has written several bestselling books and is the founder of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia.
Stewart learned how to cook and sew from her mother and also learned the processes of canning and preserving from her grandparents. She also took a passion for gardening, its knowledge, and expertise from her father.
Stewart opened up her own cooking shop and also began writing and publishing after she met Mirken. He was impressed by her talent as a chef and hostess and later asked her to develop a cookbook, containing recipes and pictures from the parties she hosted. This resulted in her first book,’ Entertaining’. This book was a huge step up for Stewart and the beginning of her career as a writer. I hope her words inspire and encourage you, entrepreneurs, to succeed.
“Build your business around something that you love – something that is inherently interesting to you.” Martha Stewart
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“It is within everyone’s grasp to be a CEO.” Martha Stewart
“Seek out people to work with who are brimming with talent, energy, integrity, optimism, and generosity.” Martha Stewart
“So the pie isn’t perfect? Cut it into wedges. Stay in control, and never panic.” Martha Stewart
“If I have a legacy, I hope it’s a really good teacher and successful entrepreneur that made every day better.” Martha Stewart
“The more you adapt, the more interesting you are.” Martha Stewart
“I find that when you have a real interest in life and a curious life, sleep is not the most important thing.” Martha Stewart
“I love the challenge of starting at zero every day and seeing how much I can accomplish.” Martha Stewart
“The most beautiful things are always simple.” Martha Stewart
“I think while I nap, so it’s not a waste of time.” Martha Stewart
“Business is being done in many different ways now, and we have to take advantage of what’s available for us. It’s very exciting.” Martha Stewart
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“Using the freshest best-quality butter, eggs, chocolate vanilla and spices makes all the difference.” Martha Stewart
“I admire the courage and self-reliance it takes to start your own business and make it succeed.” Martha Stewart
“I believe in a man and women being equal. I really believe that we can achieve anything we can set our minds to.” Martha Stewart
“I think baking cookies is equal to queen victoria running an empire. There’s no difference in how seriously you take the job.” Martha Stewart
“Life is too complicated not to be orderly.” Martha Stewart
“I really encourage entrepreneurs, if they have a great idea, to run with it. Find ways to finance, build, market.” Martha Stewart
“My goal is to inspire people of all ages to become doers.” Martha Stewart
“If you learn something new every day, you can teach something new every day.” Martha Stewart
“Without an open mind, you can never be a great success.” Martha Stewart
“Ideas grow and evolve over time.” Martha Stewart
“Our passion is and always should be to make life better.” Martha Stewart
“All the things I love is what my business is all about.” Martha Stewart
“Rebuilding is a lot harder than building. I’ve learned that. It’s the excitement of that first success that is so phenomenal that you want to keep building on original successes.” Martha Stewart
“I always thought I would be a teacher. And I think I actually lived up to my initial dreams because what I do now is teach millions of people many different kinds of things.” Martha Stewart
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“Once you realize that you have identified a passion, invest in yourself. Figure out what you need to know, what kind of experience and expertise you need to develop to do the things that you feel in your heart you will enjoy and that will sustain you both mentally and economically.” Martha Stewart
“Never make a big decision without sleeping on it.” Martha Stewart
“I don’t think there’s any company that has the same tools as Martha Stewart Living does, and people know that. They really love the tools and, if you have the tools, you can pretty much do the craft.” Martha Stewart
Check Out More Powerful Quotes:
Top 30 Quotes That Inspires The Artist In You
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Anthony C. Ejiogu
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