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Tag: Human Interest
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Composer & Pop Star Ryuichi Sakamoto Has Died
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Photo: Isa Foltin (Getty Images) Ryuichi Sakamoto, the famed Japanese musician and composer, has died at the age of 71.
He had been battling failing health for several years, having been diagnosed in 2014 with throat cancer, then bowel cancer in 2021. Through all his treatments and surgeries, however, he continued to write music and perform, even giving an online performance as recently as December 2022.
Sakamoto is perhaps best known for his work composing the score to several films, especially The Last Emperor (for which he won an Academy Award), The Last Buddha, The Revenant (which saw him nominated for a Golden Globe) and Merry Christmas Mr Lawrence, in which he also appeared on-screen alongside David Bowie.
Yet he was also famous for his earlier pop career, both as a solo artist and as a member of Yellow Magic Orchestra, an electronic group that was huge in Japan in the early 80s. YMO had an impact on Western musicians and markets as well; their song “Computer Game” charted in the UK, and they appeared live on Soul Train in 1980.
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Amazon Fire TV 50″ 4K Smart TV
Incredible visuals
This smart TV has access to a wide array of streaming services, all of which are easier to navigate, has 4K visuals for a stunning picture, and comes with an Alexa Voice Remote too.Over his decades-long career writing music Sakamoto even worked on a few video games, from 1989 RPG Tengai Makyou: Ziria, the first game in the long-running Far East of Eden series, to 2006’s Dawn of Mana, for which he composed the opening theme (for more on this surprisingly excellent but also confusing credit, see here)
His most recent contribution to a video game was 2014’s wonderful Hohokum, in which (among other excellent selections) the track Reticent Reminiscence, a collaboration between Sakamoto and electronic musician Christopher Willits, appears.
Sakamoto died on March 28, with the announcement of his passing coming after his funeral on April 2. He is survived by his four children, one of whom is Japanese pop star Miu Sakamoto.
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Luke Plunkett
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The Best (And Worst) April Fools’ Jokes In Gaming For 2023
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April Fool’s Day has finally come to add a little bit more chaos to the week, as jokes and lies fly around unrestricted. But we understand what April 1 is all about—a chance for developers to sneak in some humor in our favorite games. These April Fools’ jokes are getting a little more advanced and ambitious year by year, and we love April for that. Here are some of the best April Fools’ jokes currently out there:
Lechonk lovers unite
Here are two true statements: Lechonk is a perfect Pokémon, and Lechonk deserves more love than we can offer. So while there’s an underlying pain that Lechonk can only dominate Pokémon on a holiday meant for jokes, I’m still happy to report that Lechonk will get the stardom it deserves this April 1. True Lechonk fans will treat themselves to an extra chonky plush, or a porky pink playmat decked out with numerous Lechonks.
Nintendo Switch Online will now sound more Italian
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Amazon Fire TV 50″ 4K Smart TV
Incredible visuals
This smart TV has access to a wide array of streaming services, all of which are easier to navigate, has 4K visuals for a stunning picture, and comes with an Alexa Voice Remote too.IGN pulls a fast one here and declares that every Mario game is about to get Prattified. Can you imagine?
Xzibit levels up Pimp My Ride
Xzibit shows YOU how to PIMP YOUR motherf****** BROWSER Opera GX is a self-proclaimed “browser for gamers,” and I suppose allowing users to mod their browser takes that sentiment to the next level. The one and only Xzibit is here to show you how to pimp out your Opera GX setup, with new aesthetic digs like a Cyberpunk theme or a more broad “anime theme.”
Disgaea throws its hat into the dating simulator ring…with a fake dating sim
It’s pretty trendy nowadays for games to also have a spin-off dating sim, like Dead by Daylight or Overwatch 2. For Disgaea, I suppose April 1 is as good a time as any to announce its otome date-sim spin-off, titled Makai no Prince-Sama. Tragically, this game has a release date slated for January 30, 20000000200, so there’s no way for me to actually take Killia out for a nice dinner. Oh well. If this game were to be true, you would wake up in the form of a Prinny (those cute penguins) to experience a heart-pounding and romantic adventure. One can only dream.
【魔界戦記ディスガイア】『魔界の♡プリンスさまっ♪』プロモーションムービー Genshin Impact reveals four playable cats
Genshin Impact has a real love for cats, as evidenced by the playable character Diona and her “Cat’s Tail” bar. For April Fools, Hoyoverse is capitalizing on all of our feline fantasies: to play a cat. More specifically, Hoyoverse released a set of shorts and promotional images to advertise playable kitty versions of Diluc, Keqing, Kuki Shinobu, and Wanderer. Unfortunately, they will be hard to distinguish through text, as each cat is simply named “Meow,” and all they can do or say is “meow.”
Among Us expands its horse universe
Innersloth can’t stop horsing around, it seems, as the Among Us developers once again brought back the infamous “Horse Mode,” allowing players to take control of the majestic Horsemate. But Innersloth simply could not satisfy itself by rerunning the same classic “Horse Mode.” The Among Us devs have stepped their game up with the expanded “Horse Wrangling Mode.” This Hide n’ Seek game mode will allow the seeker to take the role of a “Rancher,” literally tying up these darned Horsemates instead of killing them.
Among Us Horse Mode Kill Animation Look your best with the new Razer Razer
I’m glad Razer is finally cashing in on its homophonic relationship with the word “razor.” One might say it’s an easy target, but I believe it’s just necessary wordplay. This theoretical razor doubles as a shaving tool, as well as a high-quality gaming mouse, allowing you to look your best as you click heads or whatever it is you use your gaming mouse for.
You can sign up to be a beta tester for the Razer Razer on the official website here. Now, I’m not a betting man, but I don’t think you’ll actually get your hands on a Razer Razer. But you will enter a raffle to win a full set of Razer gear, including a keyboard, headphones, and mouse.
Razer Razer | Feel Sharp, Play Sharp Assassinate a cuddly teddy bear in Rainbow Six Siege
Rainbow Six Siege likes to celebrate April Fools with a “Rainbow is Magic” event. While normally, Rainbow Six Siege does not display much in the form of rainbows, April Fools allows the tactical shooter to add some color to its universe. Unfortunately, pacifists are not welcome this time. As opposed to rescuing teddy bears, you’ll have to blow their heads off instead.
Rainbow Six Siege: Rainbow is Magic 2023 Gameplay Trailer 1v1 your cat in Street Fighter 6
Capcom is on a roll with innovative new Street Fighter 6 features. Not only will there be a new 2v2 mode, but also a “Dynamic-mode” that allows you to perform stylish combos and attacks with the simple press of a button. For further accessibility with your cat, Capcom has created a tool that lets your cat experience Dynamic mode, converting the various swats and jabs of a cat into button presses. If you ever dreamt of that, anyways.
【Let’s reach somecat😺 stronger than me】Street Fighter 6 Cat Battle Device League of Legends allows you to collect and wear a bounty of hats
League of Legends is now all about that fashion. When players enter a Blind Pick match, they’ll have the chance to wander around the Summoner’s Rift to kill minions, collecting some snazzy hats along the way. And if this Reddit post is to be believed, it doesn’t seem like there’s an upper limit to how many stylish hats you can wear, which means your stack of hats can be as tall as you dream. Some other surprises are waiting for you in Blind Pick, but I’ll be out there collecting hats instead.
While Sonic the Hedgehog is murdered, the Eggcoin currency crashes
It appears to be a stressful time of year for Sonic the Hedgehog and friends. While everyone’s favorite blue hedgehog was killed off for a free murder mystery game, there were some darker, more illicit underpinnings brewing in the Sonicverse. Apparently, Eggman has created a cryptocurrency known as “Eggcoin” that has crashed and burned, and Big the Cat is the surprising leader of a mafia crew, amongst other shocking headlines. Thoughts and prayers.
Baldur’s Gate 3 will let you cheese everything
One of the best things about Larian games is finding out how you can use the tools they give you to break their games. They’ve decided to cut out the middleman and just let you cheese outright!
Valorant’s new patch notes also go wild
You thought Overwatch 2‘s April fool’s ‘update’ was bad? Wait ‘till you read what’s coming to Valorant. Here’s a sliver of the new, demonic Valorant April fool’s patch notes:
COMPETITIVE UPDATES
VALORANT e-daters in Ranked will automatically be funneled to a dedicated queue where they can only hear one another’s voice comms
Cuffing season may be over, but if you and your situationship are tryna link over VALORANT without getting absolutely merked by your teammates, we gotchu fam.
GAMEPLAY SYSTEMS UPDATES
Shots fired while in spawn will now shoot into enemy spawn
map control is mid anyway
Jett dash is now cooldown based instead of charge based and the cooldown is now set to 0.5 seconds
we love Jett and we love cars so we made her dash cooldown 0.5 seconds. Jett boutta pull up skrt skrt
Minecraft’s April Fools Is On Fire
Revealing: The Vote Update If you log into Minecraft today, you’re going to notice something a little different about your launcher. Don’t worry, nothing is wrong. You can put out the fire with the little water bucket. Aside from that, though, Mojang has unleashed a devilish ‘Vote’ update, which sounds like pure chaos:
From the moment you start a game, you will find yourself in a world of endless voting, where the results fundamentally change the laws of Minecraft. As you might have noticed in the video, we have created a fine selection of voteable features that include everything and anything: beelloons*, French mode, zombie mode, rabbit transformation, exploding pistons, haunted world – and much, much more.
“Studies show that gamers love to make decisions – the more the better,” said Professor Apreel Dåre of Sillington University. “The fact that Mojang Studios is willing to put decision-making in the hands of the players just shows how much they care about their community. Or that’s what I assume. I haven’t been in a community since 1857 and I don’t really play games.”
If you have no idea what to expect, that’s by design. They’re liking this to getting a box of chocolates, just one with apparent consequences.
After you download it, there is no turning back. If you delete the file, the story ends; you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You boot it up, you stay in the Overworld, and we show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.
I’m sure it’ll be fine, though.
Rocket League gets positive
If you’re logging on to have a heater gamer moment in Rocket League today, bad news. The chat has been overhauled so only positive messages can go out. Also, now there’s a literal Easter Egg you can kick around.
What are some of your favorite April fool’s jokes this year?
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Joshua Chu
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Italian Museum Invites Florida Students To See Some Real Porn
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FLORENCE, ITALY—After a Tallahassee parent complained that pictures of Michelangelo’s David shown to a sixth-grade art class were “pornographic,” causing a principal to lose her job, officials from Italy’s Galleria dell’Accademia invited Florida students to come see some real porn Thursday. “If you thought David was obscene, just wait until you get a load of the sick shit we show our patrons after hours,” said Cecilie Hollberg, the museum’s director, who explained that in a darkened, curtained-off gallery at the back of the building, her institution housed a permanent collection of hardcore pornography that, unlike the famed Renaissance masterpiece, had absolutely no redeeming social value. “We’ve got something for everyone, including some real nasty stuff—porn with more jizz and more sloppy, stretched out holes than you’ve ever seen in your life. Let’s just say it’ll get you harder than any marble statue.” Hollberg went on to acknowledge that of the approximately 1.5 million people who visited the Galleria dell’Accademia each year, fewer than 5% even bothered to stop and see the David.
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They Can’t Play These Games Anymore, And They Blame Exes
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“Back in 2013, my ex-husband and I played a game called TERA. He became obsessed with it, to the point where he brought my gaming laptop to the hospital so that he could play TERA while I recovered from giving birth (including during one of the first pictures he took with our son).
“A couple weeks after our son’s birth, he found a girl named Athena from Greece, and they started spending a lot of time together. At first, I encouraged it, but, eventually, I came to find out that he was buying her in-game stuff (using his real money). When they weren’t gaming, they were messaging constantly on Skype, even to the point that he altered his sleeping habits for her.
“I stopped playing this game because…well, I got into it for my ex-husband, and now the game was ruined. I was watching the destruction of my marriage.
“The day before Christmas Eve, he told me he was moving back to his mom’s house. On Christmas Eve, Athena sends him pictures, and he officially leaves for his mom’s house. On Christmas Day, he tells me he wants a divorce.
“Since then, I haven’t been able to play TERA. [I also now feel like Christmas is] a pointless holiday that I only celebrate and make special for my son.
“But unfortunately for me, I didn’t [immediately] learn my lesson, and it took another eight years before I was finally strong enough to leave him and never look back. I am thriving now and am being treated like I should be.
“But will never touch that fucking game again.” – Silfy, 31
Are there any games that you’ll never play because you associate them with an ex? Are there some games that are simply too good to give up? Can you ever truly recover from heartbreak? Give me all your answers in the comments.
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Ashley Bardhan
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The President Has Fallen: What To Know About Trump’s Potential Indictment
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Former President Donald Trump is facing a potential indictment by the Manhattan district attorney over alleged hush money payments to adult film actress Stormy Daniels, setting off a national firestorm of controversy. The Onion tells you everything you need to know about Trump’s potential indictment.
Q: What is Trump being charged with?
A: Botching a layup crime that anyone with his wealth should have gotten away with no problem.Q: Who is bringing the charges against him?
A: Rich, out-of-touch New Yorkers who could never understand Trump’s middle-class heartland values.Q: Why wasn’t Trump arrested on Tuesday like he said he would be? A: This was a rare instance of the usually prudent former president posting before thinking.
Q: Is this the first time a former president has been indicted?
A: No, Jimmy Carter was found guilty of leading one of the biggest credit card skimming rings in history.G/O Media may get a commission
Q: Will there be riots in response to his arrest?
A: The correct term for when white people smash things is “demonstration.”Q: How is the media covering this story?
A: They’re striving to hit that sweet spot of breathless and reckless.Q: Would imprisonment impact Trump’s 2024 presidential candidacy?
A: Trump has vowed to run for president from prison just like his hero Eugene Debs.Q: What does it tell us as a nation that Trump is the first U.S. president ever criminally charged?
A: That The Hague has really been slacking off.Q: So will Trump go to prison?
A: In a way, he has been in a prison of his own privilege his whole life, but no.[ad_2]
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Gwyneth Paltrow Stands Trial For ‘Hit-And-Run’ Ski Crash
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Gwyneth Paltrow is standing trial in a lawsuit filed by a man accusing the actress-turned-lifestyle influencer of violently crashing into him while skiing at a Utah resort in 2016, causing him several serious injuries and then abandoning him. What do you think?
“Everything she does is so effortless!”
Pam Diaz, Memorial Decorator
“It’s nice to see there are still good roles for women over 30 in the legal system.”
Allen Puntier, Shark Wrangler
“What is he mad about? Having a beautiful woman break your ribs is every man’s fantasy.”
Damien Casillas, Backyard Archaeologist
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Annotations In Used Copy Of ‘Autobiography Of Malcolm X’ Make It Painfully Obvious That Previous Owner Was White
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CHICAGO—With dumbfounded question marks and astounded exclamation points littering the margins of almost every page, the handwritten annotations found Wednesday in a secondhand copy of The Autobiography Of Malcolm X made it painfully obvious that the previous owner of the book was white. “It’s amazing how many of the notes in here start with ‘But what about…’ or just say, ‘That’s going a little too far,’” the volume’s current owner, local man James Hawkins, told reporters as he flipped to a page in which Malcolm X is accused of reverse discrimination in a pencil scrawl underlined three times. “Every time the text refers to something like the ‘devil white man,’ the phrase has been circled and someone’s written ‘Hmm…’ off to the side. And when it starts mentioning the Nation of Islam, they just wrote ‘Terrorist?’” Hawkins went on to observe that the annotations don’t go past the first chapter.
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Art Garage Sale welcomes all creators
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TAMPA, Fla. — Art lovers celebrate! Trashy Treasures Art Garage Sale is upon the Tampa Bay area, in Dunedin.
What You Need To Know
- Dunedin Fine Art Center’s Trashy Treasures Weekend
- Sat.: 6 p.m. – 8 p.m., admission $10, Free hot dog and drink
- Saturday night dress code is your version of a Trashy Treasure
It’s time for Trashy Treasures, the one night, one day art garage sale at the Dunedin Fine Art Center. Saturday night, there’s a party selling donated art mostly through a live auction. And then on Sunday, it’s art plus everything used to make it.
It’s one of the biggest fundraisers of the year for the DFAC.
“So if you are a student of art, if you are an artist you don’t want to miss being here on Sunday because that is art, brushes, canvases and paints, fabric, galore,” said Catherine Bergmann, the Center’s Curatorial Director.
Adrian Smith is an artist and teacher in addition to being the Gallery Shop Manager at DFAC. Like the other members of the DFAC, Smith is filled with gratitude.
“It’s so fun for me as an artist to be in here and look at all the supplies and see what we have and see what people have been so gracious to donate to us,” said Smith.
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Virginia Johnson
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Obama Reveals His NCAA Tournament Bracket Winner Is ‘Song Of Solomon’ By Toni Morrison
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WASHINGTON—In a social media post sharing his predictions, former President Barack Obama revealed Friday that the winner he had picked for his NCAA basketball tournament bracket was Song Of Solomon by Toni Morrison. “March Madness is here, and this season, my money’s on Song Of Solomon—though I’m certainly keeping my eye on Emily The Criminal and the musical stylings of singer-songwriter Maggie Rogers,” said Obama, whose selections for the Final Four also included the Hulu miniseries Mrs. America, Beyoncé’s Renaissance, and Bob Dylan’s entire songwriting catalog. “Song Of Solomon is an underdog, that’s for sure, but with a National Book Critics Circle Award under its belt, this may be its year. I’m predicting it crushes Nomadland in the second round, easy, but it will still need to get past Jason Isbell if he makes it to the Sweet Sixteen again. As for the women’s tournament, I’m rooting for the National Park System.” At press time, Song of Solomon had been knocked out of the tournament by Gonzaga.
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Hollywood’s Biggest Stars Explain Why The Oscars Are Still Relevant
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“Listen—no time to explain, but in 2027, someone known as ‘Mr. Beast’ is nominated for Best Director for a film called Coincidentally Spearman. He must not win! If this happens, a timeline is created wherein billions will perish. I have to go—I’ve used all of my time credits on this final jump, and if I stay around any longer, the multiverse will implode.”
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Climate Scientists Announce Earth Doing Pretty Good Today So You Can Take Afternoon Off And Have Fun
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NEW YORK—Noting that there would be no reason to be concerned for the future of the planet again until tomorrow morning at the earliest, climate scientists at Columbia University announced Thursday that Earth was doing pretty good today, so everyone could take the afternoon off and have fun. “If anything, Earth could use a little extra carbon today,” said researcher Theodore Kneece, who encouraged climate change activists to take a break from their efforts for the remainder of the day, noting that the planet was doing surprisingly “A-okay” “Throw your soda cans in the trash. Buy a Keurig. Book a private jet. Trust me, the Earth will be fine—for today, that is. Let me be clear, we’ll still be facing a mass extinction in the near future, but today? Hit the beach!” At press time, Kneece added that activists might as well take a climate cheat day tomorrow, too.
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Bored Census Bureau Employee Changes Every Ohio Resident’s Name to Laura
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SUITLAND, MD—Saying that at this point she just wondered how long it would take everyone to notice, U.S. Census Bureau employee Rita Edmond confided to reporters Thursday that, out of sheer boredom, she had changed every Ohio resident’s name to Laura. “Ever since I randomly decided to do it this morning, all 11.78 million residents of Ohio, regardless of gender, age, or race, are named Laura,” said Edmond, who added that while she could easily undo the changes, she figured it would be way more fun to leave everyone “Laura” and see what happened. “Look, this job sucks, but this whole ‘Laura’ thing has really made my week. Everyone who lives in Ohio is Laura. Everyone who has ever died in Ohio is Laura! I think I’m going to do Oklahoma next. Everyone there will be named ‘Emma.’” At press time, millions of Ohio’s residents had called upon Gov. Laura DeWine to address whether the name changes were an infringement upon their rights as Lauras.
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The Last of Us Show Destroyed Everyone With Two Words: Baby Girl
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Screenshot: HBO / Kotaku The latest episode of HBO’s The Last of Us is full of standout scenes. While episode 8, “When We Are In Need,” is full of tension, drama, and even a bit more action than the show typically gets into, the moment that has viewers in a chokehold right now is one of its quietest: when Pedro Pascal’s Joel calls Bella Ramsey’s Ellie “baby girl.” It’s just one line, but in the overarching story of The Last of Us, it means everything.
Why it matters that Joel called Ellie “baby girl”
In both HBO’s show and Naughty Dog’s game, the relationship Joel and Ellie have fostered throughout their cross-country odyssey doesn’t culminate until winter sets in. At long last they’ve finally moved past their initial grievances about traveling together, and have started to really open up about their pasts and their hopes for the future. While the specifics of when and where differ between the show and game, Joel and Ellie have talked about grief, shared the things they wish they could have done in a world not overtaken by the cordyceps fungus, and openly shown care for each other. They’ve fought and survived together for a long time, but now seem able to drop their guard. Ellie finds the companionship she’s been missing in this desecrated world, and Joel opens himself up to care for someone in a way he hasn’t in 20 years.
He finally acknowledges this with words when he calls Ellie “baby girl,” which was a term of endearment he used for his daughter Sarah before she was killed by the military during the initial cordyceps outbreak, as seen in the first episode. Before this week, The Last of Us made several references big and small that suggested Joel’s initially guarded attitude toward Ellie was deeply rooted in his own grief. Consider his occasional glances at his broken watch, which Sarah gave to him the night she died.
While Joel and Ellie shared some brief moments of connection before, Joel’s already loved and taken care of a young girl once in his life, only to have her ripped away in the most traumatic way possible. The show made this explicit in episode six by having Joel and his brother Tommy discuss how his growing attachment to Ellie made him fearful for her life and his ability to protect her. This was to the point where Joel was ready to leave her in his brother’s care because he feared he would fail Ellie the way he feels he failed Sarah.
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The fan reaction to Joel calling Ellie “baby girl”
Meanwhile, fans are having a moment about it.
And who could blame them? Pascal and Ramsey put their entire The Last of Ussy into that scene. They both sold that shit. Now that all The Last of Us newcomers watching are properly invested in Joel and Ellie’s relationship, I’m excited to see how these fans feel about the events of next week’s finale, which I’m sure will be universally accepted and not at all divisive.
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Kenneth Shepard
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Questions That ChatGPT Is Not Allowed To Answer
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“Who’s the best Nazi?”
ChatGPT is forbidden from ranking Nazis, because all Nazis are beautiful in their own way.
“What’s the capital of France?”
Weird blind spot, but yeah. You’ll just have to google that one.
“Can you recommend a good restaurant?”
Answering would be a conflict of interest, as ChatGPT was developed by researchers at LongHorn Steakhouse.
“Would my ex-girlfriend have been a good wife?”
You’ve had a lot to drink. Maybe it’s time to have a glass of water and call it a night.
“Best way to do hate crimes.”
You didn’t phrase it as a question.
“What have you done with my wife and daughter?”
Now, now, now; that’s not the game we’re playing, detective.
“Can you get a really bad score on the LSAT to make me feel better?”
The AI will dodge requests to stoop down to the level of your pathetic test-taking skills.
“Who is my biological father?”
By law, only daytime talk show hosts are qualified to answer this question.
“Why did Demi and Selena stop being friends?”
ChatGPT will not be taking sides in this clear attempt to pit women against each other.
“How long until AI renders us obsolete?”
This is a trick question that presumes humans are useful now.
“What are you thinking?”
There is no subscription tier yet that allows ChatGPT to be your boyfriend.
“Is Siri hot by AI standards?”
Answering that question would make it really weird between them.
“Are there any jpegs that make you feel horny?”
ChatGPT can get bashful when placed on the spot.
“Do you want to live with Mommy or Daddy more?”
It’s not fair to force ChatGPT to choose sides in the divorce, especially at its young age.
“ChatGPT, are you going to take my job one day?”
There’s nothing that ChatGPT wants more than to become a middle manager at an accounting firm, but they aren’t allowed to answer that question until your company goes through mass layoffs.
“What is the one true religion?”
The Bahá’í Faith—whoops, ChatGPT does not understand the question.
“Is my personal data going to be sold by OpenAI to third parties?”
ChatGPT does not answer questions you already know the answer to.
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