New York cannabis farmers say that as the future of the state’s legal cannabis industry remains uncertain, they are facing deepening mental and financial despair as they sit on hundreds of pounds of weed at their farms.

Lisa Keller, the owner of Weaver Road Farms in Chautauqua County, has increasingly dealt with feelings of anger and depression as she’s tried to get her business together since receiving a license to grow cannabis last year.

It’s hard for her to push those feelings aside. They tug at her as she wakes up early to tend to her farm, which she owns with her husband, Ed. She then makes deliveries for her local Walmart to help pay for bills and groceries.

Contributed by Lisa Keller

Lisa Keller, the owner of Weaver Road Farms in Chautauqua County, is pictured here.

“I feel sad. And I have no luxury to stop,” Keller said. “No matter what, I’m going to keep going, and I just try to keep any of those feelings in check. You want to say f–k it, but then what do you have? Everything you’ve done is worthless. So you can’t. You just gotta keep going.

“If I give up or go into despair, then everything would fall apart. My whole household, my whole life will fall apart if I don’t keep going and do not curb any of those negative feelings.”

New York state’s legal cannabis program has been thrown into turmoil.

The already slow rollout of legal pot shops has meant that growers have nowhere to sell their product as unlicensed dispensaries typically buy from California or other states with more developed growing industries. They also don’t want to jeopardize their licenses as being part of the state program — and selling pot to unlicensed shops could lead to losing them.

A recent court-ordered pause on new stores has delayed the rollout even further. As a result, farmers are fighting for shelf space at just 23 legal dispensaries in the state.

People line up to purchase legal recreational cannabis products at the Housing Works Cannabis Co. on Dec. 29, 2022, in Manhattan.

Barry Williams for New York Daily News

Farmers are fighting for shelf space at just 23 legal dispensaries in the state. In this photo, people line up to purchase legal recreational cannabis products at the Housing Works Cannabis Co. on Dec. 29, 2022, in Manhattan.

Tess Interlicchia, a nurse practitioner who owns Grateful Valley Farm in upstate New York, said growers are increasingly considering quitting the industry as they face mounting difficulties.

“It’s been quite a nightmare,” Interlicchia told the Daily News. “… There’s really been no relief in sight for the farmers.”

Interlicchia is very passionate about the positive impacts of cannabis on mental health — but says the state’s handling of the budding industry has negatively impacted her own mental wellbeing. Farmers typically face disproportionately higher rates of suicide: Research shows the suicide rate among farmers is more than three times higher than the general population.

“You want to give up,” she said. “You want to throw away this whole cannabis venture, you want to stop chasing your passions and trying to help other people. You want to just not do it anymore. It’s depressing. It definitely is. It’s frustrating. I have had to borrow money for groceries to feed my kids. It was very humiliating.”

Interlicchia, 42, a single mother of two, started smoking cannabis as a teen, in part because it helped her depression. As an adult, she’s worked for two decades as a nurse, helping patients get medical marijuana certification to get them off opioids and benzodiazepines.

“It’s really hard. It plagues almost everybody at some point in their lives — depression, anxiety, you know, the usual things — and it’s so much more prevalent right now,” Interlicchia said. “Since the pandemic so, so many folks are suffering but cannabis really, really helps a lot … but then a lot of the farmers, we’re struggling.”

A marijuana joint is seen in a hand.

Tunatura/Shutterstock

Tess Interlicchia has worked for two decades as a nurse, helping patients get medical marijuana certification to get them off opioids and benzodiazepines. In this photo, a marijuana joint is seen in hand.

Interlicchia became so concerned for her friend and fellow farmer, Jeanette Miller, that she called the police to do a wellness check on her.

Miller, who has long struggled with mental health challenges, said that the state’s Office of Cannabis Management and state leaders have betrayed them after promising an early advantage as the first entrants into the legal weed industry.

“We’re not getting any attention,” said Miller, who owns The Eclectic Farmstead in Newfane, New York. “The farmers are the ones not being spoken about yet… Without us, there is nothing else. And yet here we are in distress, and nobody’s really listening.”

Miller made startling remarks at a Sept. 12 Cannabis Control Board meeting. The OCM came under fire for uploading a video of the meeting sans hours of heated public comment — because, a spokesperson told nonprofit news site The City, of Miller’s words.

“I wore a noose around my neck today because I feel like I’m going to hang myself,” she said at the meeting. “… We’re tired. We’re done. We’re struggling. We need help.”

Miller said her comment were intended as a wake-up call and cry for help from the state, and that she was “censored” by the OCM, as they cut out her comments and others from the video. The video has since been taken down entirely and was reuploaded with only Miller’s comments cut out on Friday morning.

Dry and trimmed cannabis buds stored in glass jars.

Soru Epotok/Shutterstock

Miller made startling remarks at a Sept. 12 Cannabis Control Board meeting. In this photo, dry and trimmed cannabis buds stored in glass jars can be seen.

“It’s Suicide Awareness Month and the governor pledged $1 billion to mental health awareness,” Miller said, referring to a multi-year plan by Gov. Hochul aimed at improving access to mental health care in the state.

“And then, when people bring awareness to it, and because of the actions of the state, the duress that it’s causing, not just for myself but other farmers who don’t have the ability to step up for the courage to get up and use their voice, let alone be vulnerable like that in public.”

The OCM declined to comment.

Josephine Stratman

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