The controversial ending to Mojang Studios’ Minecraft has sparked plenty of conversation over the years. A poem scrolls on-screen following after players defeat the Ender Dragon for a whopping nine minutes. Quotes from the “End Poem,” as the swan song is titled, have been inked on fans skins and turned into merch. But the story behind the prose is tantalizing in itself.
In a lengthy Twitter thread, Irish writer Julian Gough recounted meeting Minecraft creator, Markus Persson 11 years ago and writing the narrative ending for the adventure game, Minecraft’s End Poem. Gough said he was pressured into signing a contract with Mojang Studios, and later Microsoft after the company purchased the studio back in 2014, after the ending had already been implemented in the game. The contract would sign over Gough’s rights to Mojang and later parent company Microsoft. According to Gough, he was never under contract with Mojang when he wrote the game’s ending, meaning he owned the copyright over the poem, not the corporation. In the thread, Gough uploaded a photo of the contract Microsoft allegedly sent that Gough refused to sign in 2011 and in 2014.
“I’m lucky in that I don’t give a shit about working in the video games industry, so I can just tell the truth and whatever happens, happens,” Gough told Kotaku. “Video games are a great artform, potentially the greatest artform, but the industry as a whole frequently doesn’t treat writers with respect or understanding, and so it often doesn’t get the best out of them. It’s tragic, because the best writers can really elevate the whole game, at every level.”
After taking shrooms in the Netherlands, Gough decided to take the Minecraft Poem End under public domain through a Creative Commons license, according to his own account of the story, which he shared on Substack in December 2022. Gough said he put Minecraft’s ending under the public domain was so that players would be free to do whatever they liked with it, whether that’s using the poem in a school play, making T-shirts and posters of it, or painting it on the side of a van.
It’s a camera. For your car. The Ring Car Cam’s dual-facing HD cameras capture activity in and around your car in HD detail.
“But there’s no point giving people a present if they don’t KNOW they’ve been given it. So I wrote a long piece on Substack, telling the story,” Gough wrote in the Twitter thread. “It went mildly viral. A terrific editor at a major global media organisation read the piece, and got in touch.”
When the undisclosed media organization reached out to Microsoft, Gough says the company refused to reply. According to the writer, Microsoft’s silence was the company’s way of circumventing the Streisand effect. Rather than making a big deal out of news only to make the news become a bigger story, the article was scrapped.
“And… it worked. Silence worked. The lawyers at the media organisation, understandably but annoyingly, lost their nerve,” Gough wrote. “Without a comment, even a ‘no comment’, it was impossible to tell what Microsoft knew or planned to do. And that was too much risk for the media organisation’s lawyers, because Microsoft [has] 1700 lawyers and unlimited financial firepower.”
Kotaku reached out to Microsoft for comment but did not receive a reply.
Had Gough’s ending been for “some tiny little indie company with no legal department,” he says getting news out about his ending poem, would not have faced such high levels of “scrutiny” and obsessive fact-checking by lawyers.
“If they said or did anything, we could have reacted to it. If they made a good objection, we could have changed a few lines, and published,” Gough wrote. “If they made a bad objection, we could have shown them proof that we were right, and published.”
Gough told Kotaku its been interesting seeing his Twitter thread receive a support from fellow writers and folks in the video games industry.
“I’ve even received PayPal donations from Microsoft employees! That was a pleasant surprise,” Gough said. “And I’ve had some eye-opening DMs from writers, and other creatives, who feel they were screwed over by big games companies, but who are afraid to say anything in public, because they worry they will be quietly blacklisted. There’s a lot of hurt out there.”
At the end of his thread, Gough encouraged players to read and share the original Minecraft game’s ending, which can be seen in the YouTube video below.
Thirsty Suitors is a cross between Scott Pilgrim’s battles with evil exes, stylish arcade skateboarding, and cooking segments all portrayed through a South Asian cultural lens. Outerloop Games’ RPG stars Jala as she returns to an old town with old flames, and frames their reconciliation through turn-based battles where the simple act of talking to each other is pumped up to ridiculous levels. There’s even a stage in which Jala enters a dream world where her exes appear as powerful, distorted versions of their own self-concept. Think Persona 5 but with fewer criminals. Jala explores her old town on a skateboard (more Jet Set Radio than Tony Hawk), and when she’s home with her family, she cooks with her mother in over-the-top, campy fashion. Thirsty Suitors portrays all of its storylines in this way, but there’s a grounded humanity at its core that will be exciting to see when the game launches on PC, PlayStation 4, PlayStation 5, Xbox One, Xbox Series X/S, and Switch.
It’s been a minute since we’ve heard from Hempuli aka Arvi Teikari, the developer behind the adorably excellent push-puzzler Baba Is You. Well, Teikari is back with another game in the Baba-verse. This time, though, instead of pushing objects and altering the rules of reality, you are pushing tax papers in a short exercise of comedic relief. That’s right, the white little critter is doing their taxes in the aptly titled Baba Files Taxes.
This new game, available for free on itch.io (Windows only), tasks you with helping the smol cat-dog thing get their taxes completed. There’s just one problem, though: the deadline to file is tonight! You’d better rush to get Baba’s paperwork done while there’s still time. What does this look like in practice? Basically, you’re forging Baba’s signature on a bunch of legal documents, which I’m pretty sure is a criminal offense, but hey! The government doesn’t know what’s going on, and you better not tell them! Besides, Baba’s just a lil guy, and as the game informs you early on, reading and writing are not among Baba’s strong suits.
Icely Puzzles
Once you’ve filled out the papers filled with legalese as well as multiple-choice questions like “What are clouds made of?” and “What is emptiness?”, you’ll submit the papers to a purple blob person who asks a simple question: “What are taxes?” A waste of time, buddy. A total waste of time. You’ll also get graded for how well your signature matches Baba’s, which is hilariously ironic considering the creature doesn’t have actual hands. But I digress. In all, Baba Files Taxes will take you roughly 10-ish minutes to finish.
Though they’re not the same kind of game, Baba Files Taxes reminds me of Snoozy Kazoo’s Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion. Maybe it’s because both games have “tax” in their titles, which makes my hairs stand up as we steadily approach the tax-filing season. The annual act is such a nuisance on its own, often becoming something of an IRL puzzle. Maybe Baba can help me file my taxes now that I’ve helped them, but to be honest, I’m not holding my breath. If you’re looking for something short and charming to check out, though, Baba Files Taxes is a quick hit before the floodgates open.
I was warned of how heated Kotaku’s GOTY arguments traditionally get when I first started here in November, so I was a little nervous when I was put in charge of organizing and tabulating our list of the best games of the year.
Would everyone vote? Would they get mad at me for ranking Destiny 2: The Witch Queen too high? Would Ethan Gach actually do what he was threatening and “hobgoblin” the voting process by adding negative points to the equation?
Turns out, however, that even though organizing this entire process was a pain in the ass, the team at Kotaku is exactly as opinionated, intelligent, and professional as you might expect, offering great insight and honest takes on the top games of 2022. Though we voted on over 20 titles (including ones that narrowly missed this list like Rollerdrome and Sifu) we narrowed it down to a top 10, and have ranked them in order below.
How does Kotaku’s top 10 games of 2022 stack up with your personal GOTY lists?
10. Xenoblade Chronicles 3
Image: Monolith Soft / Nintendo
Reductively, Xenoblade Chronicles 3’s story is an amalgamation of Japanese RPGs whose emotional climax rests on the age-old theme of “war is bad.” Nevertheless, the fact that the trope has become a well-trodden cliché doesn’t dismiss how well developer Monolith Soft executes its anti-war theme throughout Xenoblade Chronicles 3’s 150 hours of playtime.
In Xenoblade Chronicles 3, you play as a troupe of child soldiers from warring nations locked in an endless battle where their limited lifespans fuel a giant mechanical clock once they meet their untimely demise. The kids are not alright. But despite the painful emotional journey its child soldiers must go on, which is portrayed with the emotional maturity and complexity it deserves, the game is not without some great moments of levity as well, courtesy of some lighthearted and silly sidequests. Meanwhile, Xenoblade’s more serious sidequests drip-feed players with rich character studies that flesh out each member of the party, along with the game’s expansive world and its deep cast of supporting characters.
Although Xenoblade Chronicles 3 was snubbed for the best roleplaying game and best soundtrack at Geoff Keighley’s Game Awards, it did give us an impassioned flutist performance from Pedro “Flute Guy” Eustache. This shows that even if Xenoblade loses at gaming’s glorified popularity contest, it still provides some of the best moments in gaming this year.
Isaiah Colbert, Staff Writer
9. Signalis
Image: rose-engine
Much like how I use Devil May Cry 5 as the measuring stick for how good a hack-and-slash game is, whenever I brave playing a survivor horror game I do so with the hope that its story measures up to Silent Hill 2. Big shoes to fill, I know. Signalis not only manages to fill those shoes, it damn near tore the seams off of them joints with how bloody good it was. I’d even argue that it’s better than Silent Hill 2.
Signalis has all the bells and whistles that make for a good sci-fi survival horror game. It’s got a brutal-but-fair limited inventory system, brain-teasing puzzles, and breadcrumb storytelling conveyed through codex entries scattered about its levels. However, where Signalis sings is with its gripping story about two lesbian androids desperately trying to find each other in a space hellscape.
Throughout the game, you play as an android named Elster who’s stranded on an alien planet rife with horrific monsters and derelict spaceships. Elster’s sole mission is to reunite with Anne, a fellow android unit she both literally and figuratively can’t live without. Signalis sticks its landing with the emotional climax of Elster’s perilous journey, regardless of which of the game’s multiple endings you arrive at. This feat is even more impressive considering Signalis is the first video game made by its two-person development team, rose-engine. Ay yo, 2023, can we get some more of those sapphic survivor horror vidya games, plz?
Isaiah Colbert, Staff Writer
8. Norco
Image: Raw Fury
Norco emerged this year and joined Kentucky Route Zero and a few others on the shortlist of games that speak deeply to the experience of living under late-stage capitalism in America at this precise moment in time. Like Cardboard Computer’s masterpiece, Norco also takes its cues from point-and-click adventures, using stunning pixel art to pull us into its industrialized Louisiana landscapes. And where KR0 lent its midwestern road trip a heaping helping of magical realism, Norco uses near-future sci-fi elements to cast the forces its poor, marginalized characters face in sharper relief.
But don’t let my easy comparison make you think Norco is a pale imitator of another game. It’s very much its own remarkable experience, one with its own visual identity, its own poetic voice, and its own noir-ish mystery. Everything about Norco rings painfully true, from its observant little environmental details like the electrified hum of a street light, to the much larger way that religion, cryptocurrency, and the oil industry all become woven together in the haunting texture of your character’s search for her missing brother. Norco, Louisiana is a real place. The Norco of this game is not quite that place, but it’s nevertheless one that feels very real in its own way, and that will leave you reeling from the piercing gaze it levels at the world we’ve made for ourselves.
Carolyn Petit, Managing Editor
7. Horizon Forbidden West
Image: Sony
Poor Aloy. Twice now, her adventures have been somewhat overshadowed at the time of release by other games that more dramatically captured the world’s attention. Her first outing, Horizon Zero Dawn, launched just a few days before Breath of the Wild. This year, her second quest was followed a week later by Elden Ring.
But despite repeatedly serving as the opening act for games that go on to sweep the GOTYs of a hundred gaming sites, Guerrilla Games and Aloy can be proud of what they’ve accomplished. Arguably the most visually stunning game of the year, Guerrilla’s latest takes Aloy into the ruined American west for more of the thrilling, spectacular battles with hulking metallic beasts that helped make the first game an original in a sea of samey open-world blockbusters. And although the larger narrative may fly a bit off the rails in this outing, Forbidden West wisely stays focused on Aloy’s personal journey as someone who feels the weight of the world on her shoulders and doesn’t know how to let her guard down and allow her friends to carry that burden with her. It complicates her character and trusts us as players not to turn on her the moment she behaves in ways that are arrogant, cruel, or misguided. Oh, and you get a really sweet new travel option near the end of the game, too.
Yes, when all is said and done, Aloy and her escapades can stand tall alongside the Links and the myriad Tarnished of the world.
Carolyn Petit, Managing Editor
6. Neon White
Image: Annapurna Interactive
It was about 3 in the morning. I had plans the next day. I really needed to go to bed. Yet, here I was hunched over my computer focused on shaving just one more second off a level in Neon White so I could beat a friend on my leaderboard. That’s the power of fast-paced, FPS platformer Neon White. It’s the kind of game that feels so good that you just can’t stop playing it. Once you get skilled enough to start finding shortcuts in levels, it’s over–the game has you at that point. You’ll end up going back to old levels you thought you mastered to shave off more time. And if you enjoy anime nonsense, angels, demons, and sick-ass music, too, then Neon White will dig its angelic claws deeply into you and never let go. “One more run…and then I’ll go to bed.” I didn’t get to sleep that night until nearly 4:30 am.
Zack Zwiezen, Staff Writer
5. Citizen Sleeper
Image: Jump Over The Age
The profane and sacred mingle with delicate grace in Jump Over The Age’s minimalist cyberpunk RPG about trying to earn your humanity from a world that can’t pay its debts. Every detail from the writing and art to the branching choices and tabletop-inspired dice rolls connect, overlap, and reinforce each other with precision and care so that no piece is weaker than the rest and no rough edge is left exposed. Few games manage to evoke universal feelings or personal truths, but Citizen Sleeper does both at the same time. The future never felt so hopeless and yet so comforting.
Ethan Gach, Senior Reporter
4. Marvel Snap
Image: Second Dinner / Kotaku
Going into 2022, I don’t know how many people expected a free-to-play Marvel card game designed for phones to end up being one of the best and most popular games of the year, yet, here we are. Second Dinner’s fantastic bite-sized card battler, Marvel Snap, really is one of the best digital card games out there right now thanks to its small decks, fast rounds, and random nature. Matches always feel different and even a loss doesn’t sting too bad because it’s over so fast. Sure, it’s still a free-to-play mobile game, so you can expect stuff like iffy over-priced bundles and having to grind for currency. But luckily Marvel Snap is so fun to play that it’s pretty easy to overlook those bits and enjoy one of 2022’s best games.
Zack Zwiezen, Staff Writer
3. Vampire Survivors
Image: poncle
One more run. A sentence I’ve repeated countless times in 2022 either in my head or quietly aloud to justify playing Vampire Survivors for just a little while longer. The gothic roguelike shoot ‘em up became a surprise smash hit while spawning worthy spiritual siblings like 20 Minutes Till Dawn.
Since Valve started releasing the data in August, Vampire Survivors has been tops in total hours played on Steam Deckmonth in and month out. This is the same Steam Deck that can run frickin’ Elden Ring! But people want to play Vampire Survivors instead!
All those players are onto something, Vampire Survivors has a simple yet satisfying gameplay loop: your character (I’m partial to Peppino) must survive an ever-growing horde of ghoulies while choosing between randomly generated weapons. If you make it to 30 minutes, the reaper will come calling, which lets you spend coins on power-ups for future runs. You can be strategic in choosing weapons that complement each other or you can just try shit out! These elements of discovery, relentless isometric top down action, and Vampire’s lax attitude towards player death (it has zero impact) remind me a lot of Hades, another regular on that Steam Deck most-played list, and another GOTY contender from years past.
Vampire Survivors’ developer Luca Galante/poncle has regularly been updating the game since it left early access, adding modes, quality of life improvements, and settings to tweak for extra replayability. What’s more, the game recently got its first full-fledged DLC the other week with Legacy of the Moonspell. With the base game retailing at five dollars ($4 under the current Steam sale), Vampire Survivors makes for one of the better bang-for-your-buck propositions in gaming. Go ahead and treat yourself to some floor chicken.
Eric Schulkin, Video Lead
2. God of War Ragnarök
Image: Sony
Sony Santa Monica’s God of War Ragnarök is more of everything. More abilities and weapons. More enemies and locations. More characters and plot details. Hell, even more loot. Though you could interpret this as a knock against the game, especially since more isn’t always better, Ragnarök takes the “more” and deftly applies it in tasteful ways while making room for a compelling narrative and gameplay experience that’s enjoyable and immersive. Combat is crunchy, exploration is intriguing, dialogue is captivating, and the themes are deep and engaging. But what stands out as the glisten on the diamond is the character development between daddy Kratos and adolescent Atreus, an element that sees the co-protagonists finding common understanding in the face of the end of the world. Sometimes, it takes things falling apart for empathy to be reached, and God of War Ragnarök is a glowing example of just that. It’s good shit.
Levi Winslow, Staff Writer
1. Elden Ring
Screenshot: FromSoftware / Kotaku
Are you surprised? Elden Ring easily and inevitably took the top spot during our voting process, further proving that 2022 was the year of Elden Ring. Many Kotaku staff members ranked it as their number one game of the year, and for good reason. FromSoftware’s open-world epic feels like a giant leap forward for the Souls-like franchise, offering us a beautifully deformed and dangerous Lands Between to explore, rife with opportunities to discover oddities, collect goodies, and die over and over again.
Elden Ring opened up Hidetaka Miyazaki ’s sick, twisted world for the normies who haven’t enjoyed FromSoft games before it, while also making sure to still cater to the hardened vets looking to prove their worth in incredibly tough battles. It found a perfect balance between that punishing gameplay so many long for in a game from this studio and a newfound sense of agency, of a chance toget gud without having to run into the same noxious swamp over and over again.
Elden Ring is technically impressive, visually stunning, and satisfyingly challenging. It has humor, it has sadness, it has turtle popes. It dashes your hopes up against a jagged rock only to hand you hope back bit-by-bit as you strengthen your character and your resolve. It is everything that we hope for in a video game, and then some.
First released in 2021, indie shooter Nightmare Reaper finally left Early Access this year, and that’s when I finally played it. And boy oh boy, am I happy I stumbled upon this under-the-radar FPS! Nightmare Reaper might look a lot like other, similar retro-inspired shooters—like the previously mentioned Cultic—that have become more common in recent years, but it’s so much more than that. It’s a roguelike with smart level progression, awesome music, and hundreds of powerful and zany weapons like whips and spell books. It’s a weird game, too. But in a good way. For example, to improve your character’s stats you play through different, elaborate Game Boy-like mini-games. It’s weird, it’s sometimes creepy, and it’s only $25 on Steam. Go play Nightmare Reaper! — Zack Zwiezen
Look, I thirsted over Professor Turo for half the year. It was a significant touchstone of 2022.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
When it comes time to write these year-end lists, I usually slim them down to my top five favorite games I played because, despite what this job entails, I usually only have passionate feelings about a handful of games by the time we reach December.
But 2022 was a weird one for me, in that I feel like I played fewer games than ever. Not that any of that has anything to do with Kotaku, as I’ve only been here for about two weeks so far. But going through tumultuous times and a layoff at the last job doesn’t leave one much energy to invest time in a ton of games.
But I did experience a handful of games that really resonated with me, a few of which were old ones that got renewed in some way in 2022. So don’t yell at me when you see them on this list. It’s my list, and I’ll cry about Cyberpunk 2077 if I want to.
I’m a simple man. If the electric rat is there, I’m happy.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Honorable mention: Pokémon Scarlet and Violet
Getting two major Pokémon games in 2022 was a lot for some people, but being able to run around a Pokémon world with Raichu by my side is the only thing that keeps me going some days. So I was happy to indulge in an open-world Pokémon in the form of Pokémon Violet. However, I just have too many issues with this game to give it a proper spot on my list. It’s buggy, sure, but it’s also designed in such a way that it can’t keep up with its own “find your bliss” philosophy, which made entire sections of its main story annoying and disorienting to play through.
That being said, the stellar endgame has completely rewired my brain and I can’t think about Professor Turo without crying, and playing a Pokémon game in co-op with my friends is a childhood dream come true. It’s deeply flawed, but I keep looking back at screenshots of me and my friends hanging out in Paldea like an old photo album. It’s got so many great ideas, but it’s all built on top of a shaky foundation. I’m awaiting its DLC with bated breath.
I loved Kratos and Atreus’ story, but all the other story threads God of War Ragnarök spun were too much for one game.
Honorable mention: God of War Ragnarök
I really adore the 2018 God of War reboot as an examination on the series’ previous gleeful glamorizing of gratuitous gore, and when it was at its best, God of War Ragnarök felt like it was building beautifully upon Kratos’ and Atreus’ relationship as father and son. But, man, what a messy follow-up it was.
I like large swaths of Ragnarök, and I think, had it been broken up into two games and made a trilogy, rather than Sony Santa Monica attempting to introduce and wrap up two games’ worth of story in the course of an exhaustively long game, I would’ve loved it a lot more. Its action still feels weighty and fun and getting to play as Atreus was a lovely surprise, but it feels breathless and bloated in a way the 2018 reboot didn’t. I’m always going to wonder what the conclusion to God of War’sNorse story would’ve looked like as two games instead of one, as those are the ones that would’ve likely made it onto my list.
Cyberpunk 2077‘s city skyline makes me well up the way most open-world vistas don’t.Screenshot: CD Projekt Red / Kotaku
5. Cyberpunk 2077
I’m still very resistant to any narrative that Cyberpunk 2077 is “great” in 2022 after CD Projekt Red put in the work to elevate it from the technical disaster it was when it launched in 2020, but the game was still a central figure in my year, and has gone from something I played out of a work obligation two years ago to a game that’s become pretty special to me.
I played through and dissected Cyberpunk 2077 all year as part of Normandy FM, a retrospective podcast I co-host, and combing through that game in a relatively stable technical state unmasked that it’s a pretty unremarkable RPG. That being said, as a person who spent all of 2022 dealing with the realities of the capitalist gristmill that is America, both through job stuff and in the medical system, there was something freeing about existing in Night City, which felt like an oppressive, capitalist amalgamation of the cities I dreamed of living in while I was stranded in small-town Georgia.
When Cyberpunk 2077 wasn’t being insufferably cynical about people, places, and things, it was a constant interrogation of what I was willing to live for, and why I wanted the things I wanted in life. It’s a product of the same capitalist hellscape it claims to satirize, but in the margins there are things worth fighting for, even if you have to go looking for them on your own terms. I don’t boot up open-world RPGs very often, but throughout 2022 I would turn on Cyberpunk 2077 just to drive around the city and imagine the possibilities it held for me. Thankfully, I live in a city now, and no longer have to dream. But Cyberpunk 2077 was a lifeline during a time when the home it proposed felt unattainable. For that, I’ll always keep the story of V and Night City in my heart, even if I don’t think it’s a great video game.
Haven’s Couples Update gave queer fans a new reason to experience the RPG in 2022.Screenshot: The Game Bakers / Kotaku
4. Gayven (Haven, but gay)
Haven completely slipped by me in 2020, but that changed this year when The Game Bakers added an update that let you play as same-sex pairings of its main characters Yu and Kay. As a person who has written a lot about queerness in the video game industry, I was immediately drawn to Haven as a case study in a developer putting in the time and effort to make a game queer-inclusive. Getting to experience Yu and Kay’s story from the perspective of two queer men was a wonderful way to first experience the game, and made its angsty science-fiction romance all the more affecting for me as a gay man who eats that shit up.
Haven is a lovely meditation on long-term relationships, with its exploration and turn-based combat broken up by scenes of Yu and Kay just living together through the most mundane parts of being together. Where many video games thrive in the lead-up to a romantic relationship, Haven sits with what it means to already be well and established, and it leads to some of my favorite romance writing in a game. It’s full of big, oppressive science-fiction ideas, but its best moments are when two people sit together in their home and speak to each other not as spacefaring adventurers, but as two star-crossed lovers willing to find pockets of joy when they’re all they’ve got left.
We Are OFK is essentially an interactive music video, but the drama between its indie pop bangers is just as compelling.Screenshot: Team OFK / Kotaku
3. We Are OFK
The music of We Are OFK, an episodic biopic about a group of young adults drifting through the L.A. game dev grind and into a musical act, nearly topped my Spotify Wrapped this year. The band was second under Coheed and Cambria, my favorite band that released a new album this year, which speaks volumes about how catchy and contemplative Team OFK’s indie pop stylings are. These songs are interwoven between We Are OFK’s depiction of the dramatic, interpersonal relationships between a group of queer creatives just trying to figure their shit out.
We Are OFK is contentious as a video game, as its interactive elements feel insubstantial beyond choosing text messages and playing through an interactive music video at the end of each episode. But as an unapologetically queer musical drama about finding yourself and those willing to put up with your bullshit, it’s deeply relatable. The game exists as a springboard for a larger virtual band experience, and as long as they keep producing bangers like “thanks,” and “Infuriata,” I’ll follow it in whatever form OFK exists.
Overwatch 2 is still only half the game Blizzard promised, but its PvP suite is still pretty damn great.Screenshot: Blizzard Entertainment / Kotaku
2. Overwatch 2
Look, look, I know. I know Overwatch 2 is a mess of microtransactions and free-to-play grind, but Blizzard’s sequel/reboot of its hero shooter is still such a gold standard for team-based combat that I have sunk nearly 300 hours into it since its launch in October.
Right now, Overwatch 2 isn’t exactly what I was looking for when Blizzard announced it back in 2019, as its story content has been pushed into 2023. I (foolishly) came into Overwatch on the back of its characters and lore, so I’m still eagerly awaiting that side of the sequel. However, in its complete revamp of the original game’s format in favor of a 5v5 setup, its new modes, the heroes, and the great deal of attention given to its contextual banter writing, Overwatch feels more alive than it’s felt in years. This is damage of Blizzard’s own doing, as the company essentially put the first game on ice until Overwatch 2’slaunch. But it’s comforting as a long-time player to finally see signs of life for the game after all this time, and to feel hope for its future for the first time in years.
Pokémon Legends: Arceus was a mechanical evolution, but also a narrative one, as well.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
1. Pokémon Legends: Arceus
Pokémon Legends: Arceus was everything I’d been wanting out of a Pokémon story for over a decade. After years of watching the franchise add to its mythology and world, it never really felt like many of these games were living up to the promise of the universe Game Freak had built over 25 years. Pokémon Legends: Arceus was the first time since I was a child that this setting felt as large and unknowable as it did in my youth.
Much of that came from Legends: Arceus’ use of a historical setting, rather than the modern one seen in most other Pokémon games. Taking the player back to when the Sinnoh region was known as Hisui, being present for lore-defining conflicts, and watching the universe’s gods have it out was more impactful than hearing about them through historians and seeing cave paintings and statues. It felt like a second chance for Sinnoh to feel like the significant origin point of the universe it had been described as in Diamond and Pearl.
On top of just feeling more vast, Pokémon Legends: Arceus was also the most tangible the world felt to me as a player. This was thanks to Game Freak’s shift into action-oriented mechanics like actually being able to aim and throw a Pokéball at an unsuspecting wild Pokémon, stealthing around the wilderness to avoid giant Alpha Pokémon, and being able to fluidly traverse its open areas on the backs of friendly critters. Even when Pokémon Scarlet and Violet attempted their own versions of these systems, it never felt like they quite captured Legends: Arceus’ frictionless traversal, and that’s why they felt flimsy in comparison.
Legends: Arceus solidified to me what it is I want out of Pokémon games. Some people want to capture every Pokémon in the Pokedex, some want to compete and become a respected champion. But for me, existing in this world and discovering its secrets with Raichu by my side is why Pokémon still holds my attention decades later, and Pokémon Legends: Arceus is the most I’ve felt captivated by this universe, probably ever. I hope it’s a blueprint for the series’ future, because I feel like, otherwise, I’m going to be chasing the highs of its best moments for years to come.
Those well-versed in their Metal Gear Solid trivia will know that the original ending for Metal Gear Solid 2 was changed before release. Scenes involving a massive ship crashing into Manhattan island were a bit too much in a very young post-9/11 world, with images and videos of planes striking the World Trade Center a constant in the media. In a recent interview, director Hideo Kojima talked about the complicated nature of releasing such a game after a world changing event and how it nearly drove him to quit Konami.
Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty released in November of 2001 to much anticipation. As a series focused on “Tactical Espionage Action,” the games have never shied away from political themes, be they a part of the fictional story or commentaries on world events and history. While it’s been known for some time now that elements of the game were changed at the last minute due to the September 11 attacks, recent comments reveal that the stress and challenge of handling such a release were enough to push Hideo Kojima to quit Konami at the time. A conversation with Konami’s chairman, Kagemasa Kozuki was what convinced Kojima to stay back then.
Speaking with Shuka Yamada for IGN, Hideo Kojima described an awkward and tough situation after Metal Gear Solid 2, due to release in the Fall of 2001, contained images of the World Trade Center and other sites that were attacked on 9/11.
9/11 took place in 2001 right before the release of Metal Gear Solid 2. We’d just sent off the master, but the game featured both the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. It seemed impossible to release the game. I was called to the board of directors and they all turned pale when I explained the situation. Nobody would tell me what to do, with the exception of Mr. Kozuki, who tackled the issue.
As I thought about what to do, I went to speak with Mr. Kozuki about possibly quitting the company. That’s when he told me: ‘When this game comes out and society has their say about it, they’ll be talking about you, its creator, and me, the person who sold it. I doubt they’ll say anything about anyone else. What will you do? I’m ready for whatever happens.’
When I heard how far he was willing to go, I made the firm decision that we’d release it together. The rest is history.
MGS2 would go on to receive critical acclaim. The game’s tactical stealth gameplay was a dramatic evolution of what came before it and its meta-narrative filled with postmodern themes about digital information, virtual realities, among many others, is still relevant and widely discussed.
After MGS2 shipped, Kojima found himself in dire need of recovery. “I became completely exhausted, and I always end up in an awful state when I finish making a game,” he said. “After the first Metal Gear Solid, even after it was done I wasn’t recovering at all and ended up being passed from one hospital to the next.”
9/11 and the themes of Metal Gear Solid 2 weren’t the only time Kojima would face the need to alter his work. As we found out during The Game Awards this year, Kojima rewrote the original story for the sequel to the narrative-driven, post-apocalyptic delivery-service simulator, Death Stranding; the game’s themes of loneliness, isolation, and world-altering events were too close to what we all went through (and are still struggling with). The Covid-19 pandemic followed Death Stranding’s 2019 release by only a few months.
“Fiction changes when something that big happens,” Kojima told IGN. He continued:
That’s why I completely rewrote [Death Stranding 2]. You can’t pretend that something this big never happened. While the games themselves are based on characters who are not bound by our reality, the players themselves have gone through the pandemic, and a story written before that experience just wouldn’t resonate with them in the same way, whether it was a fantasy story or a sci-fi one.
Kojima Productions is currently working on Death Stranding 2. The company is also working on an unnamed game with Microsoft, a project Kojima says other publishers turned down; though he pitched the idea to a few places, he describes the game as requiring “infrastructure that was never needed before.” Other companies seemed to not be as into the idea, “they really seemed to think I was mad.”
Whatever that new game is, let’s hope he’s not predicting an awful future for us yet again.
Last month, the legendary co-creator of Sonic the Hedgehog was arrested for allegedly purchasing shares in a development studio before its involvement in a Dragon Quest game was announced. A month later, he was arrested a second time for reportedly buying stock in a company that was set to work on a Final Fantasy spinoff. Yesterday, Tokyo prosecutors formally charged Yuji Naka for inside trading roughly $1,080,000 in Final Fantasy stock.
According to NHK, the Tokyo District Public Prosecutors Office determined that Naka had been making a profit on insider trading (Thanks, VGC). For the uninitiated, insider trading is when someone with non-public knowledge of a company is able to use that information to trade stock at an advantage. Doing so is illegal in Japan. So Naka ran afoul of the law when he purchased shares in ATeam before the studio had announced that it would be developing the mobile game Final Fantasy VII: The First Soldier, a battle royale that was exclusively released for mobile devices. Though the game was announced in 2021, Naka was arrested on December 7 of this year.
This was a month after he had been arrested the first time for buying shares in Aiming, the studio that created Dragon Quest Tact. In both of these incidents, he was arrested alongside Square Enix employee Taisuke Sasaki. Sasaki was indicted for trading roughly $782,000 in stock.
If the two made a profit off the ATeam stock, it was presumably before The First Soldier was canceled less than a year after its launch. Square Enix had clearly been hoping to capitalize on the popularity of Fortnite and other battle royales. Instead, First Soldier suffered severe performance issues and was exclusively available on mobile.
Naka had joined Square Enix in 2018 to direct Balan Wonderworld, a strange action-platformer that was near-universally panned as a flop. The game was unfocused and confusing to many reviewers, and Kotaku included it on a list of the year’s biggest gaming disappointments. The director departed Square Enix in June 2021. Maybe Naka would have been better off if he had been focused on directing a good game instead of manipulating the stock market.
2022 was truly the year of Elden Ring, with FromSoftware’s latest game exploding into the mainstream unlike anything it had previously created. As such, a lot of people played and finished Elden Ring. In fact, according to one set of data, Elden Ring was the most completed game of 2022. But funnily enough, the same source also pegs it as the game players were most likely to abandon before reaching the end.
If you’ve read Kotaku (or any other gaming website) in 2022, you are likely already familiar with Elden Ring, the latest game from Dark Souls creators FromSoftware. And like Dark Souls and Bloodborne, Elden Ring is a tough-as-nails action-RPG with a heavy focus on mystery, world-building, and boss fights. However, this time around FromSoftware added a true open world to its popular “Soulslike” formula. The end result? One of 2022’s most acclaimed, best-selling games. The open world in particular helped sway many to try Elden Ring for the first time, letting players avoid harder areas until later and ostensibly making it easier to finish than past FromSoftware adventures. And it seems that design choice paid off.
According to data on HowLongToBeat.com, Elden Ring is 2022’s most completed game, with nearly 6,000 users of the site reporting they have played and finished the massive open-world RPG. That’s an impressive number when you look at the runner-up games on the list. Stray, that adorable futuristic cat game, was completed by nearly 4,000 users. Meanwhile, in third with 2,500 completions, was Game Freak and Nintendo’s Switch hit, Pokemon Legends: Arceus. To see such a big and difficult game top the list is both a sign that Elden Ring is very good and also a hint at the kind of audience that is primarily using HowLongToBeat.com.
Screenshot: Howlongtobeat.com / Kotaku
But perhaps more interesting is that Elden Ring is also the most “retired” game. When users “retire” from a game on Howlongtobeat.com it means they have given up on it, either permanently or temporarily. Now, even though only 261 players officially retired from Elden Ring on the site, that’s still more than double any other game in 2022. Even if the dataset is a bit small and weird (how many people are logging into this site to admit defeat?) it’s still an interesting data point.
This all makes sense to me. Elden Ring was the most talked-about game of 2022, and with that many people playing, it makes sense that a good chunk of them might give up on it. Other data seems to suggest around half the people playing Elden Ring never reached the end. So I buy that Elden Ring could be the most completed game of 2022 while also being the game more people gave up on than anything else.
Some other interesting 2022 data from the site: Turns out Elden Ring is also on the most backlogs, has the most reviews, and is the longest game of 2022. However, Naughty Dog’s The Last Of Us Part 1 is the most positively reviewed game, and Diablo Immortal is the worst-reviewed.
Photoshop is my true Elden Ring, and I haven’t gotten gud yet.Image: FromSoftware / Kotaku
In recent years, it’s become harder and harder for me to make the kinds of in-depth, year-end personal best lists that I once prided myself on. That newfound difficulty is for one reason: I’m not playing as many games. This year, there are so many games I either didn’t play at all or didn’t spend enough time with that may have earned a place on this list if only I’d given them more of a chance. Those games include (but are not limited to) Perfect Tides, Xenoblade Chronicles 3, Pentiment, Citizen Sleeper, and Norco. I’m sorry I didn’t make time for you this year. I’m sure some of you, at least, are great.
So I’m keeping this year’s list to a tight five, acknowledging that it might have looked very different if I’d played more games. Please accept it in the spirit in which it’s given, not as an exhaustive evaluation of games in 2022, but as a snapshot of some of the games I spent time with and admired throughout the year.
Honorable Mention: God of War Ragnarök
Screenshot: Sony
I dunno, man. I didn’t love it. I’ll certainly remember it, though, in all its frustrating rigidity, and it’s one of the few games I played to completion this year, so it earns a spot on this list, if not a number. God of War Ragnarök is a game in which the main character, ostensibly a god, is frequently unable to leap across tiny gaps to smash the chest or reach the path on the other side because the true gods here, the game designers whose heavy hand you feel at every turn, say he has to do it the intended way. It’s an endlessly limiting game, with Kratos as trapped as Pac-Man in his maze. It’s a game in which characters are constantly wondering and worrying about whether their fates are dictated by prophecy, which is ironic given that the game itself is so trapped by formula and expectation.
Ragnarök seems to want to deepen Kratos as a character, to question all the unbridled rage and quick-time-event sex-minigame misogyny of the original God of War games, but it can’t actually shatter the chains that bind it, because then, what would it be? What would it be if Kratos didn’t haveto be an angry killing machine? What if he could actually show more emotional growth and expression than a tiny, late-game bit of tenderness, which only feels significant because we’re so used to seeing him express no tenderness at all? What if he could cast off patriarchy altogether and find a new way forward?
G/O Media may get a commission
Sadly, we may never know, as the marketplace still seems to set strict limits on just what a “AAA,” prestige release can be. The one thing I really appreciate about Ragnarök is how, in the end, one character is left truly broken by grief, and the game doesn’t try to bring it to a tidy resolution. There’s nothing anyone can say to fix it, to solve it, to make it go away. It felt like a kernel of surprising emotional honesty in a game that is mostly just going through the motions of being what fate dictates it must be.
Honorable Mention: Vampire Survivors
Screenshot: poncle
Here’s one that didn’t quite make the list but that I fully appreciated, without qualm or reservation. I’m normally very suspicious of games that seem focused on letting you become a ludicrously powerful figure who can wipe out enemies by the hundreds. Vampire Survivors, however, is just so gleefully unapologetic about it, fully embracing its nature as a video-game-ass video game, that it won me over. There’s a real sense of joy and discovery here as you pursue powerful new weapon fusions which let you harvest your unending legions of Castlevania-inspired foes even more effectively and in even more dazzling ways. On a really good run, the screen can get filled with so much 8-bit weaponry and pixelated carnage that it all starts to look like a psychedelic kaleidoscope of holy vengeance. Now that’s what I call gaming.
Atari 50
Screenshot: Atari / Digital Eclipse
Now the true list begins with this, game number five in my ranking. Almost certainly the best video game compilation ever made, this 50th anniversary Atari retrospective offers both a look back at one of the most important and influential forces in early home gaming, and a look at what the future of gaming retrospectives could and should be.
What elevates Atari 50 head and shoulders above your standard collection of older games is its gorgeous, timeline-format presentation. As you make your way through various aspects of Atari’s history—early arcade games, early console games, home computers, and so on—the games and the hardware are contextualized with tons of wonderful new interviews, archival footage, and other material that helps tell the story of just why these games, and the people who made them, are so important. Here’s hoping other developers take a cue from Atari 50 and give their early games the treatment they deserve.
Artist and writer Brianna Lei’s follow-up to her 2017 visual novel may be the most deeply human game of the year. The four central characters continue to navigate things like crushing parental expectations, confusing thoughts about gender, and romantic yearning for other girls in scenes that are by turns hilarious and heartbreaking.
It’s not just the subject matter or the great sense of humor that makes Butterfly Soup 2 remarkable, though; it’s that Lei reveals to us the rich and complicated inner lives of her characters—their hopes, their insecurities, their fears—in ways that feel organic, honest, and compassionate. In video games, the explorations of character that get the most attention and praise are often those that accompany big-budget mainstream action. In my opinion, though, there’s more heart and more insight into the human condition in this two-hour game about queer Asian high-school girls than there is in most post-apocalyptic blockbusters or games about violent dads trying to be better.
I was both excited about and wary of Return to Monkey Island, series creator Ron Gilbert’s return to the helm of the comedic pirate adventure saga. The last entry he oversaw was 1991’s Monkey Island 2: LeChuck’s Revenge, which has one of the all-time great video game endings—one so good, in fact, that for a long time I swore off later games in the series, as they both lacked Gilbert’s guiding hand and flew in the face of 2’s conclusion. Could even he, I wondered, make a game worthy of following up such a boldly uncompromising moment?
But here’s the thing. I’m a teensy bit older now than I was when Monkey Island 2 came out. I’m less wowed by raw artistic boldness and more moved by human frailty, kindness, and honesty. Ron Gilbert is older, too, and you feel a gentle reckoning with that in this game, as Guybrush goes on a kind of existential quest, one of those “what does it all mean” things that calls into question what his whole life as a pirate has really even been about. Return to Monkey Island is suffused with tenderness, above all. Sure, it’s still funny, and Guybrush is as irresistibly likable as ever, but there’s a poignant quality to him and the game itself this time around, an acceptance that things change and that life doesn’t quite play out the way you think it will. There’s beauty in that, too. Return to Monkey Island is just lovely.
Elden Ring
Screenshot: FromSoftware
When I first played Dark Souls, I felt like something in my brain was being rewired as I discovered all the intricate ways its interlocking, shortcut-filled world turned in on itself. And like many others, I found a kind of therapeutic catharsis in throwing myself against its grueling gauntlet, facing defeat again and again and again until finally, bruised and bloody, I stood victorious. It became a way of facing internal demons of doubt and fear, of enduring the world’s transphobic slings and arrows and remaining unbowed.
Elden Ring couldn’t quite match those glorious heights for me, though I appreciate that its open-world format, which makes its myriad challenges more approachable but no less uncompromising, meant that with this game, many got to experience those thrills for the first time. But even if it didn’t burrow into my very soul (no pun intended) the way Dark Souls did, the Lands Between still captivated me with their faded grandeur and their sense of true mystery—mystery of the sort that reveals, by contrast, just how embarrassingly eager so many game worlds are to force-feed you everything they have to offer.
Fortnite
Image: Epic Games
But alas, there was one world which captivated me even more. Epic’s battle-royale juggernaut continues to have, for my money, the best world in all of games—a world that is constantly changing, constantly evolving and slipping away; a world that, unlike most game worlds, actually exists in time and feels its passage. (It’s because the game is constantly reinventing itself that I have no qualms about including it on a 2022 list.)
Over the course of the game’s seasons and chapters, the world shifts in ways big and small, always in flux where so many worlds feel stagnant. Locations that come to feel as familiar to you as an old hoodie sooner or later fade, and when they’re gone, you can never, ever go back. As the world evolves, so too does the game, which is in a state of constant change—and loss. New gameplay mechanics, too, come and go with the seasons, not because the game is striving for some kind of ultimate, perfect “optimization” of mechanics and balance, but simply because things change.
The ever-evolving island is the perfect setting for this game of wild, radical contingency, a game in which the actions of players ping-pong off of each other in ways so complicated by chance and choice that there’s no room for the bullshit “meritocracy” mindset that poisons so much of gaming culture. Sure, some people are much better at the game than others, but with 99 players running around, their encounters influenced by so many factors, Fortnite is at least as much a big chaos-theory playground as it is a test of skill. Each match is home to a dozen or more stories that unfolded just so and will never, ever happen quite that way again. And as you make your way across the island, you see the evidence of them—a pile of goodies marking a player’s death near a few hastily tossed-up walls; a smoking semi-truck half-submerged in a river; a confrontation happening in the distance with players ping-ponging across the landscape, using this season’s shockwave hammers to fling themselves wildly into the air and then come crashing down on their opponents.
Of course, Fortnite constantly breaks my heart, too. In what I can only assume is an effort by Epic to make it so that all of the game’s human players win, on average, somewhat more than one out of every hundred games, it’s flooded the island with bots, beginning with the start of the game’s second chapter in October of 2019. They may seem like human players of rudimentary skill to those players who weren’t around back in the game’s pre-bot days, but their presence and simplistic behavior saps the game of much of its dynamism. I’d much rather have every confrontation be with a human adversary whose desire to survive and to win I can feel coming through in their actions, even if it means I rarely score a victory royale myself, than frequently encounter these non-human opponents who practically offer themselves up to my crosshairs.
But what can I do? The kind of life, vibrancy, comedy and tragedy that Fortnite offers remains unique in my experience in the gaming landscape, so I’ll keep leaping onto the island, always eager to see what signs of life and change I might stumble upon this time.
After over a decade of FromSoftware games holding court as the quintessential ‘git gud’ franchise, locking those of us without a masochist bent out of the discourse, Elden Ring’s open world opened up the gates for an entirely new player base. As such, it catapulted the work of Hidetaka Miyezaki to entirely new heights: Elden Ring is by far the best-selling FromSoftware title, it’s snatching up GOTY awards like Rowa Fruit, and it’s still generating passionate conversations 10 months after its release.
By subtly divesting from the tried and true FromSoftware formula and giving us a game unshackled by a single, punishing, linear path, EldenRing offered up the Lands Between on a beautifully ornate (but slightly Tarnished) silver platter. And we gobbled that shit up.
Feeding The Difficulty Discourse Machine
These guys are called Abductor Virgins, and they suck. Image: FromSoftware
The Souls game discourse has almost solely revolved around difficulty. Before Elden Ring was released, FromSoftware’s Yasuhiro Kitao told Eurogamer that the game was “made for all sorts of players,” not just “hardened veterans.” This sent the fanboys into a tailspin, but it piqued the interest of those who have never been able to enjoy the punishing gameplay of FromSoft’s oeuvre.
I wrote about Kitao’s quotes back when I was at GamesRadar, suggesting that what would make Elden Ring great would be its approachability, and that that approachability was made possible by its open world. It’s a helluva lot easier to avoid difficult areas if you can run around them on horseback, but previous Souls games forced you to choose between the difficult path and the bang-your-head-against-the-wall-because-it’s-impossible path. The promise of ample choice made me think that maybe, just maybe, Elden Ring could be a game I’d enjoy.
Image: FromSoftware / Kotaku
Conversely, Forbes published a response to my piece, one that hoped Elden Ring’s open world wouldn’t ruin the FromSoftware vibes by focusing too much on “making these games approachable rather than tough and gritty.” This was months before the release date, but the discourse machine turned and turned and turned, smoke spewing from every inch, its cogs grinding and grating with each new take chucked into its gaping maw.
Until February came, and brought with it the Lands Between, wide open for exploration like a darker, deadlier Breath of the Wild. Players quickly learned that most of them were accidentally skipping the combat tutorial, and a bit more slowly learned that the first boss (that fucking Tree Sentinel) was avoidable. Many of us who could never latch onto a FromSoft game willingly clung to Elden Ring’s teat, as we learned we could, in fact, get on a horse and fuck off away from some horrifying eldritch beast.
As we collectively made our way through Elden Ring, we were given the gift that comes only with truly open-world games: seemingly endless discoveries by ourselves, our friends, and other players on the internet.
Braving Brutal Battles For A Glimpse Of Beauty
Need a hand?Image: FromSoftware
The beauty of Elden Ring lies in its world that teems, bubbles, and spews with both friendly and deadly life, that tantalizes and terrifies with its landscapes, that beckons and shuns you in a single breath. I find this beauty in so many moments during my time with the game, like when I accidentally descend down to the Siofra River, not too long into my playthrough.
In Limgrave, I step on a platform and am whisked down, down, down, until I emerge into an astounding space: a fully realized night sky in a variety of bruise colors, littered with pinholes of light. Crumbling classical architecture obfuscates my view of this impossible galaxy and tombstones line the path leading away from the platform, which glowed a bizarre green during my descent but now lies dormant.
I am, as the kids say, gagged, and stumble aimlessly away from the platform, paying little attention to what enemies may lie in my path for the first time since booting up Elden Ring. This is a mistake I quickly pay for, as I walk directly into a horde of Claymen. They move slowly, but they hurt, and I am severely underleveled for this area. One of the weaponless magic conjurers takes me out in seconds with his weird bubbles, sending me back to the Site of Grace right next to the platform that brought me here. When I go back to fetch my several hundred runes, the same guy takes me out again.
“Fuck that,” I mumble before stepping on the stone circle at the center of the lift. “I’ll come back later.”
And I do, just much, much later. After I’ve discovered I’m a battle mage with an affinity for gravity magic and summons, and long after I fell the Tree Sentinel with a single Rock Sling, I return to the Siofra River from a completely different direction, and lay waste to its inhabitants. Then, after I’ve collected every last item dropped by a fallen NPC and picked all the Ghost Glovewort my eyes can see, I allow myself a second to breathe. I glance up at that still-impossible night sky, and exhale. I earned this. Elden Ring, unlike other FromSoftware games, gave me ample chances to amass the tools and experience I’d need to earn a brief respite.
Elden Ring Eternal
I’m an Aries.Screenshot: FromSoftware / Kotaku
But Elden Ring isn’t just somber and serious, it’s not just hours of grueling gameplay with brief, meditative breaks. It’s goofy as hell, like all FromSoftware games inherently are. There are stupid, dirty messages littered all over the ground, dozens upon dozens of ways to die that will make you chuckle in disbelief, and the ever-popular but always somewhat broken online play that encourages players to fuck with one another.
It’s this combination of punishing play, engaging story (thanks, George R.R. Martin), and asinine antics that make FromSoftware games, especially this one, so special. Elden Ring gives you enemies like Starscourge Radahn, who will in one moment beat the brakes off of you with gigantic meteors flung from a blood-red sky and in another send you into a fit of hysterics when you realize that he is, in fact, sitting on top of a very tiny horse. Elden Ring plays with you, offering up prophecies and moral quandaries that will have you scratching your head, but undercutting it with both accidental and purposeful absurdism.
Screenshot: FromSoftware
Elden Ring gives you a gigantic turtle wearing a pope hat. It gives you strange, unsettling storylines about grapes that are actually eyeballs. It tucks a giant bat grandma away amongst a rocky outcropping and gives her a haunting song to sing ad infinitum—or until you slash at her leathery, gray skin. It deflates your hope in humankind at one juncture just to build it back up again at the next.
It lets you explore this incredibly fucked-up world for hours upon hours, fall in love with some of its characters and revile the rest, taxing you physically and mentally with enemies plucked from the deepest depths of game design hell, and at the end, it presents you with a few options that don’t really fucking matter. It does all of this while making itself playable for us FromSoft plebeians, which therefore (brilliantly) means more of us will be talking about it than any game that came before.
When we inevitably look back at Elden Ring a decade from now, it will be difficult for us to remember exactly how much it defined the zeitgeist, just how far it permeated popular culture outside of gaming, and just how much we couldn’t stop talking about it. But now, ten months after its release, it’s hard to imagine we ever existed in a world without it.
Space Quest IV: Carolyn Petit and the Time RippersScreenshot: Sierra Entertainment
It must have been Christmas of 1991 that I found Space Quest IV: Roger Wilco and the Time Rippers under the tree, and got the gift of seeing exciting new possibilities in games.
I was a fan of adventure games, sure, having played a few games in Sierra’s King’s Quest series, not to mention Lucasfilm’s brilliant and bizarre early titles like Maniac Mansion and The Secret of Monkey Island. But this was my first experience with Space Quest, Sierra’s comedic sci-fi series starring Roger Wilco, the hapless space-janitor who finds himself thrust into one cosmic misadventure after another.
To be honest, I don’t remember much about the quality of Space Quest IV’s puzzles. What I do remember is how varied and vibrant its universe seemed, with harsh alien worlds, moody cantinas, and glitzy space-malls. But what really knocked my socks off about the game was how meta it was. After progressing a bit through Space Quest IV: Roger Wilco and the Time Rippers itself, poor Roger finds himself flung into (the non-existent) Space Quest XII: Vohaul’s Revenge II.
Screenshot: Sierra Entertainment
Today, it’s not so uncommon for games to break the fourth wall and wink knowingly at the player about being video games, to play with conventions in ways both tired and inspired. But wow, was this exciting for me in 1991! The game also sees you venturing into Space Quest X: Latex Babes of Estros (an obvious riff on the 1986 Infocom adventure Leather Goddesses of Phobos) and all the way back to the original Space Quest, which already looked humorously primitive and pixelated compared to 1991’s state-of-the-art graphics, making high(er)-definition Roger Wilco all the more conspicuous.
Screenshot: Sierra Entertainment
Space Quest IV may or may not be a great game, I honestly don’t remember well enough to say. I just remember sitting there on my Christmas break, awestruck by the clever meta-ness of it all, and having my mind expanded about the possibilities of what video game storytelling and structure could do.
Another one aimed at older kids, Nuts is the bonkers combination of Firewatch and…squirrel conspiracy theories?
In this one, you set up cameras to observe the behavior of squirrels in Melmoth Forest, and start discovering some very odd stuff. This develops into a story about the effect corporations have on the environment, and doesn’t wrap things up with a neat bow and happy ending. It’s obviously a great conversation starter, as well as a fun, sometimes unsettling game to play.
The reason it’s rated Teen is because of the presence of one curse word, “bullshit,” so there’s a good chance that’ll breeze past the more innocent, or not really bother the less so. But obviously the subject matter won’t quite match the “cute squirrels!” expectations of younger players.
There are more suggestions over at the Family Video Game Database, and you can curate your own lists based on your own kids’ proclivities.
Hopefully there’s something here that’ll help pass some of the yawning stretch of Sundays that makes up Christmas to New Year, and you might even end up not entirely resenting it.
Updated 12/21/22: We’ve removed Boomerang X, and added on Lego Star Wars: The Skywalker Saga, Trombone Champ, and Escape Simulator.
If you’ve played Half-Life 2 or Source engine mods, you’ve likely seen the in-game model “Corpse01.mdl.” The burnt corpse appears multiple times in Half-Life 2’s sewers and other parts of the game, and modders often used it in fan projects. All is well, yes? Well, it was until recently, when fans noticed that the game’s creepy-looking corpse has the face of an actual dead man on it.
Released in 2004, PC shooter Half-Life 2 was the highly anticipated follow-up to Valve’s first game, Half-Life. Upon release, it was widely praised by critics and players. But while it came out to huge acclaim, there was a time when Half-Life 2 wasn’t such a sure bet, as its development process was messy and protracted. Valve scrapped different versions, cut entire sections, and lightened up the game’s intended darker, grittier tone considerably for the final retail release. However, some leftovers of this darker version remain in the final game, including Corpse01.mdl. Playing the game as a kid, the body always looked hyper-realistic and creeped me out whenever I stumbled upon it. Now, we know why.
Valve’s macabre texture-cribbing was discovered completely by accident (h/t The Gamer). About two weeks ago on the r/eyeblech subreddit, someone posted graphic images of dead bodies they claimed were from a medical forensic textbook. (While I’ve personally verified the images posted are real and out there, I won’t be linking to them. A little Googlin’ will lead you to them if you really want to see them.)
In the comments on that post, someone pointed out that one of the images showing a burned corpse looked identical to the Corpse01 model from Half-Life 2. Another post picked up the thread and people quickly began comparing the images to the art in the game. Sure enough, they look identical. The only change appears to be that Valve copied the right eye of the corpse onto the left. That’s it though. The entire face of that model is seemingly a dead dude’s face. Yikes.
Then, three days ago, gaming YouTuber Richter Overtime uploaded a short and concise video detailing the history of the corpse and its connection to the image, and this seemed to take the story fully mainstream, with folks tweeting about it and sharing it more widely online. As you might expect, a lot of Half-Life fans were freaked out to learn that they have been looking at a real corpse for the past two decades. One modder has already created a new model to replace the old one for folks who feel uncomfortable leaving the original dead face in Half-Life 2.
G/O Media may get a commission
Kotaku has reached out to Valve about the corpse to verify its origins and to ask if the company has any plans to change it with a future patch.
Personally, I’m not sure this is a thing that should be in a video game. It seems to me like it might be time to remove this model and replace it with an image of anything but an actual burned human corpse.
If you want to become the very best, you’ve gotta beat the very best.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Defeating the Elite Four and the regional champion in battle is a rite of passage in most Pokémon games, and that includes Scarlet and Violet. These are supposed the most-powerful Pokémon trainers in the Paldea region, and overcoming them and their teams is the only way to become the regional champion yourself.
But what should your team look like if you’re going to take on these trainers? Before we go trainer by trainer and talk about what weaknesses you’ll need to exploit to become Paldea’s champion, let’s touch on some general tips.
Level up before you go-go
Between all the trainers you’ll fight in the Paldea Pokémon League, you’ll face Pokémon whose levels range from 57 to 62. Since you’ll have already beaten all eight regional gym leaders, you’ll notice Scarlet and Violet have a sizable gap between the most powerful gym leader and the first of the Elite Four. Grusha, the Glaseado gym leader, had his Pokémon in the late 40s, and the Elite Four starts out 10 levels higher. So definitely do some training beforehand to get your team leveled up to at least the mid-50s.
“You need healing!”
Pokémon veterans will tell you that before you challenge the Elite Four, you need to stock up on healing items. These fights all happen in sequence, and you won’t be able to leave to heal your team and come back between them. However, you will have a chance to use healing items before each fight to your heart’s content. The PokéMart right outside the Pokémon League building will have plenty of Hyper Potions and Revives for you to buy. These will be helpful both between battles and during them, as it’s likely you’ll need to heal up if one of the Elite Four manages to take out some of your team.
G/O Media may get a commission
Jack of all trades is better than a master of one
Over the years, I’ve seen a handful of Pokémon players who like to play with teams that double up on moves of the same type, rather than having a nice spread of attacks that lend themselves to more diverse situation. I prefer greater versatility. For example, during the main game, my Raichu had Thunderbolt (Electric), Play Rough (Fairy), Iron Tail (Steel), and Focus Blast (Fighting). Between these four moves, he could reasonably deal damage to nine out of Pokémon’s18 creature types by himself. This is the kind of moveset I try to have with my entire team, which gives me more options for whatever situation the game throws at me.
If Raichu could use a super-effective Iron Tail on a rock/ground-type Pokémon, but would still be in danger of being one-shot by a devastating Earthquake, I could switch to my Quaquaval and use a water or fighting move without having to worry about him succumbing to the same weaknesses Raichu would. Versatility is a good rule of thumb to keep in mind when you’re building a team, because a team of six Pokémon can’t cover this many weaknesses without learning moves outside its base typing. While it’s important to keep in mind what moves your Pokémon will get a bonus for thanks to their base typing or tera typing, don’t put all your Poké eggs in one Poké basket: You’ll just limit yourself and make fights harder than they need to be.
Save between fights
It can feel cheesy, but you should always be saving between fights at the Elite Four. If you lose a battle, all you’ve gotta do is close the game and reopen it to start where you left off. Do this before you’re transported back to the Pokémon Center in order to circumvent the autosave (or turn it off in the options menu), and you’ll be able to just try each fight again with new knowledge. You can also use this time to change your team’s movesets around if you find yourself lacking a super-effective response to one of your opponents’ Pokémon.
Without further ado, let’s talk about the Elite Four and the champion of Paldea.
Rika specializes in ground-type Pokémon and will stomp you into the ground if you’re not prepared.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Rika, the ground-type master
She is beauty, she is grace, but Rika’s team of ground-type Pokémon is full of a bunch of doofuses. Between Whiscash, Dugtrio, and Clodsire, half her team has big “not a thought behind those eyes” energy. But they’ve still got some hard-hitting moves and effective defenses that can take you by surprise if you’re not prepared.
Dugtrio and Donphan are the most straightforward of Rika’s team, as they’re standard ground-type Pokémon weak to all of ground’s weaknesses: grass, ice, and water. Having a mix of these types of attacks will be important, however, as the other three Pokémon she uses have inherent counters to each of these types.
Rika’s Whiscash sets a precedent for how you should approach her party: You can’t just stick to one of ground’s typical weaknesses for the entire fight. As a water/ground-type Pokémon, Whiscash is only weak to grass-type moves, but it is double weakened by them, as they overpower water and ground-type Pokémon. So a grass-type move is best to start with, but be mindful of its Blizzard attack, as that will knock most grass-type Pokémon out real quick. Luckily, Whiscash is fairly slow, so if you can get a reasonably strong, risk-free attack like Energy Ball—or Meowscarada’s signature attack Flower Trick for those who chose Sprigatito as their starter—Whiscash’s double weakness to grass should do a lot of the heavy lifting for you.
Camerupt also requires a bit of forethought, as its fire/ground typing makes it more resistant to grass and ice attacks. However, water attacks will do four times as much damage against it, as both fire and ground are weakened by it. Unlike Whiscash, who could severely damage a grass-type Pokémon who weakened it, Camerupt doesn’t have a strong offensive option for the average water-type Pokémon. Its moves lean hard into its fire and ground typing, but it does have a steel-type move in Flash Cannon, which could be rough on any rock Pokémon in your roster if you decide to target its ground weakness rather than water. So the safest course of action is to use a water move like Aqua Tail or Quaquavel’s signature Aqua Step to take advantage of its lower physical defense stat.
Clodsire is Rika’s final Pokémon, and one of her trickiest. She will use her tera orb on it to overwrite its poison/ground typing and make it simply ground, so if you were planning on using a psychic attack to exploit its poison base typing, you’ll have to adjust. On top of this, Clodsire also has Water Absorb as its ability, which negates water attacks and also heals its HP by a quarter of its health. So it’s not just a wasted turn to try and use a water attack, it’s actively beneficial to Rika’s big oaf. Clodsire’s weaknesses in this scenario are grass, water, and ice.
Normally, I would advise against using a grass-type Pokémon against it because of its base poison typing, but Clodsire doesn’t have any damaging poison moves that could weaken a grass-type Pokémon. It does have Toxic, but that will only inflict the poison status, rather than do poison damage. The biggest struggle with Rika’s Clodsire is that, if you go in expecting to use certain moves, its tera typing or ability can trip you up. But once you know its actual spread of weaknesses, it’s a bit more straightforward.
Clodsire has a bulky special defense, but its physical defense is much lower. So if you can hit it with a physical ice or water move (such as Ice Spinner, Ice Hammer, or Aqua Tail), or fall back on the Aqua Step (if you’ve got it), Clodsire should go down pretty quickly.
Poppy’s cutesy personality is a façade hiding a powerhouse party of steel-type Pokémon.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Poppy, the steel-using child labor law violation
The second of the Elite Four is a case study in juxtaposition between trainer and Pokémon, as Poppy is probably the youngest trainer in the Paldea region, but has some hefty steel-type brawlers on her team. All that being said, fighting her team requires the same flexibility as Rika’s, as her Pokémon ebb and flow between the steel type’s strengths and weaknesses. As nice as it would be to pick your strongest fire type and set them all ablaze, Poppy’s team has a few notable counters for the types that weaken steel.
Poppy leads with her Copperajah, and it’s an immediate counter to fire types. It just has a simple steel typing, but with moves like High Horsepower, it can go toe-to-toe with a fire-type Pokémon with little issue. It also acts as a setup Pokémon because it has Stealth Rock, which will scatter stones around your team, dealing rock damage to any Pokémon you send out throughout the battle. This is especially bad for fire-type Pokémon, as they’re weakened by rock attacks.
You have a few options to counter this. One is to just knock Copperajah out so quickly it doesn’t have the chance to use Stealth Rock, which is best accomplished by using a powerful fire, fighting, or ground attack. Copperajah has a lot of HP and can pack a punch, but its defenses are pretty middle of the road, and it’s exceptionally slow. So if you can manage to outspeed it (fairly easy) and knock it out in one hit (challenging, but doable) you can circumvent the danger of Stealth Rock altogether.
I generally avoid teaching my Pokémon the most powerful moves in their respective typings because they often come with drawbacks to accuracy or recharge time, but if you want to be thorough here, a Fire Blast or High Jump Kick can wipe Copperajah out before it has a chance to set up. These are often overkill in typical play, but when you’re facing a match-long threat like Stealth Rock, better safe than sorry.
If you’re not so lucky to take Copperajah out quickly, having a Pokémon who can clear enemy hazards is always smart. Pokémon like Donphan, Forretress, or Coalossal can learn Rapid Spin, which will clear out the Stealth Rock without being in too much danger from Poppy’s steel Pokémon.
Magnezone is fairly straightforward, as its double weakness to ground-type moves makes it an easy one-hit knockout. Corviknight is also pretty simple, as it doesn’t have much to counter its fire and electric weaknesses.
Bronzong is a bit trickier, as it has plenty of counters for fire-type Pokémon with Rock Blast and Earthquake. It also has the Levitate ability, which makes it immune to ground-type moves most steel Pokémon would be susceptible to. As such, it’s better to focus on its psychic typing, rather than steel. A good dark-type Pokémon would be an ideal counter thanks to its immunity to Bronzong’s psychic attacks, and one that has high physical defense would be able to withstand all of its moves. Umbreon would be a good fit, as it has strong physical defense, and its base dark typing would give it immunity to Bronzong’s psychic moves, as well as strengthen its dark-type attacks like Dark Pulse or Crunch.
Poppy’s last Pokémon is its Tinkaton, which she will terastalize into a full steel-type. Even without the tera type, Tinkaton’s physical moveset packs a punch, so it’s a force to be reckoned with if you’re not careful. Luckily, its weaknesses don’t really change too much with this typing beyond adding fighting. So, if you have fire-, fighting-, or ground-type moves (which you will probably have needed to get this far in the fight), you should be good to take out Tinkaton.
I’d recommend opting for ground, as Poppy will likely exploit either of the other two with Play Rough and Stone Edge, which weaken fighting and fire, respectively. Tinkaton has a hefty special defense, so using a physical-based ground move like Earthquake is your best bet.
Larry, the star of the show, can’t show up only once in Pokémon Scarlet and Violet.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Larry returns to fly to new heights
I can’t lie, he made such a positive impression on me as a gym leader earlier in Pokémon Scarlet and Violet that I lost my mind when Larry, Pokémon’s embodiment of the Dolly Parton song “9 to 5,” showed up as a member of the Elite Four. But while his normal-type team required one strategy, his flying-type party in the Pokémon League requires another.
Unlike Rika and Poppy, most of Larry’s trickiest Pokémon lead his team. While most flying-type trainers in this series can be easily handled with a good electric-type Pokémon like Raichu or Jolteon, Larry’s Tropius, Oricorio, and Altaria all require you to look for alternate weaknesses.
Tropius is a grass/flying type, which means it’s double weak to ice. Historically, I don’t typically make space for an ice-type Pokémon on my team because most water-type Pokémon can reliably learn ice moves, but Tropius is kitted out with Sunny Day and Solar Beam, which is a combo that can make short work of any water-type that dares to enter the field. So if you don’t have an ice-type Pokémon to throw out a quick Ice Beam or a water-type that’s both fast and strong enough to interrupt this setup, it might be best to opt to target one of its other weaknesses.
Luckily Tropius has many with its grass/flying typing, so we can pick from fire, flying, rock, or poison, as well. Presumably, you have a fire-type Pokémon from your fight with Poppy, so that’s a good Pokémon to lead with and get a good Flamethrower out before Tropius has a chance to set up its Solar Beam.
Oricorio’s electric/flying typing is interesting, because separately, those two elements have straightforward weaknesses to exploit. But together they limit your options because it will be immune to ground moves and relatively resistant to electric ones. Its remaining weaknesses are rock and ice, Either option is as effective, but be mindful that it also knows Icy Wind, which can be super effective on some rock-type Pokémon if they have a secondary ground affinity.
Larry’s Altaria is one of the Pokémon you’ll face that feels directly spec’d to counter its usual weaknesses. The dragon/flying Pokémon knows Moonblast (Fairy), Flamethrower (Fire), Ice Beam (Ice), and Dragon Pulse (Dragon), which is a hard counter for almost anything you can throw at it…almost.
Altaria can counter dragon and ice pretty handily, but it doesn’t have much to take out fairy Pokémon, or defend against fairy-type moves. It has pretty respectable physical and special defense, but its physical defense is a tad lower. So if you’ve got someone on your team that knows Play Rough, it’s a solid counter that exists in the gaps of Altaria’s moveset.
Then all that’s left is Starapator and a terastalized flying-type Flamigo. You can take out both of these handily with strong electric attacks. It’s best to avoid ice-type Pokémon for these last two, as both of them have fighting attacks that could do significant damage.
Hassel teaches art at the academy in Paldea, but he also teaches the art of Pokémon battling as a member of the Elite Four.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Hassel teaches one final lesson
The final fight before the champion is against Hassel, the art teacher in Paldea’s academy. He specializes in dragon-type Pokémon, and his team includes a few ‘mons you likely won’t have seen by this point in your playthrough. So it’s good to be prepared for the twists and turns of this battle.
Noivern leads Hassel’s team, and it’s one of the simplest in the group. It’s weak to all of dragon-type’s usual weaknesses, but its flying/dragon typing makes it twice as weak to ice-type moves. So blow a gentle, cold breeze in its direction (Ice Beam) and it should fall pretty quickly. Flapple is also pretty straightforward, as its grass/dragon typing makes it extremely susceptible to ice attacks, which it doesn’t have any real counters for.
Haxorus is also just a dragon-type, but it has a wider type coverage with its attacks. With Dragon Claw, Crunch, Iron Head, and Rock Tomb, it can reliably counter both ice and dragon Pokémon, so your best bet is to exploit the fairy-sized gap in its offensive capabilities as you did with Larry’s Altaria. Its physical defense is notably stronger than its special defense, so if you have Pokémon like Sylveon with an attack like Moonblast in your bag, you can make short work of Haxorus.
Dragalge is complicated because it can easily take down dragon and fairy Pokémon with its poison-type Sludge Bomb and dragon-type Dragon Pulse. So the safest weakness to exploit is likely psychic. You could also try ground, but do keep in mind Hassel’s Dragalge knows Hydro Pump, which can drop ground-type Pokémon in a single turn. Meanwhile, it doesn’t have any real counters for a psychic Pokémon, making it the poison/dragon-type’s biggest vulnerability.
Finally, we have Baxcalibur, Hassel’s ace and Scarlet and Violet’spseudo-legendary. Hassel’s strategy with this Pokémon is pretty simple: Terastalize into a full dragon-type, and then use its signature move Glaive Rush until it wipes your team. If you have a fairy-type Pokémon you’ll be immune to this attack, so that will take the greatest threat off the table. But, oddly enough, Hassel’s Baxcalibur only knows two other moves, the ice-type Icicle Crash and fighting-type Brick Break. Fairy Pokémon are resistant to fighting attacks, and damaged normally by ice. So if you’ve got a fairy with decent special attack like the aforementioned Sylveon, you can carve your way through this Pokémon.
Geeta charges her tera orb as if it will make any meaningful impact on this battle. Go, girl. Give us nothing.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Here comes the final challenger, Geeta
After you defeat all the members of the Elite Four, you’ll be given a complementary party heal before you face Geeta, the champion of the Paldea region.
As fans have noted since Scarlet and Violet launched, Geeta’s team is a bit underwhelming for a champion, even compared to the Elite Four who are supposedly under her. She doesn’t specialize in any one typing, so there’s not the same subversion and adaptation you see in the other trainer fights. No one on her team is particularly powerful like Hassel’s Baxcalibur or Poppy’s Tinkaton. The weirdest part of all of it is that Glimmora, which is treated as her signature Pokémon, is a setup Pokémon by design, but she uses it last and wastes its Toxic Debris ability. As such, the only real strategy with her is simply having Pokémon who know attacks that weaken hers.
More than half of her team has a one-type elemental affinity, with psychic-type Espathra, grass-type Gogoat, and ice-type Avalugg all starting out as such, and Glimmora becoming one by terastalizing into a rock-type.
Espathra and Gogoat are mostly lacking in hard counters to their weaknesses. A ghost, dark, or bug attack will take Espathra out, though be wary of its Dazzling Gleam if you choose to go the dark route. Gogoat has basically nothing to combat a fire, bug, or flying Pokémon. Avalugg fares a bit better—Earthquake gives it something to fight off any fire or rock Pokémon—but its remaining moves feel like they’re there to fill spaces rather than help it overcome anything you throw at it. So feel free to safely use a steel or fighting attack.
Veluza and Kingambit have dual typings, which makes them a little more complicated, but their movesets are still pretty straightforward. Veluza is a water/psychic type, but those types together don’t create any sort of interesting resistances or immunities to be aware of. It’s weak to everything those types are weak to, so a bug, ghost, grass, electric, or dark move will be super effective. Geeta also hasn’t taught it any moves that weaken its usual vulnerabilities, with the closest thing to a subversion in its kit being Ice Fang, and ice moves are fairly predictable for a water-type Pokémon to have. As such, there’s not much to worry about here.
Kingambit has one saving grace, in that the dark/steel Pokémon knows Zen Headbutt, a psychic move that would make short work of a fighting-type Pokémon who would otherwise be able to exploit its double weakness to fighting. But the Pokémon is also terribly slow, so if you can outspeed it, you have a chance to avoid the attack altogether.
Then there’s Glimmora, whose puzzling placement just really underlines how suboptimal Geeta’s team is. The rock/poison Pokémon will terastalize into a rock type, which does halve its normal double weakness to ground into just a standard one, but it is still very much weak to fighting, steel, and water. This change also opens itself up into a grass weakness it didn’t have before.
When it comes to attacking those weaknesses it has Dazzling Gleam to handle fighting-type Pokémon and Sludge Wave to handle any grass-type Pokémon without a secondary type to resist it. So the safest type to use is water, but Glimmora is also slow enough that you can probably get those attacks out fast enough to defeat it anyway.
There are hints in Pokémon Scarlet and Violet’sendgame that Geeta and Glimmora are tied into story elements that have yet to be explored. As such, it makes some sense that narratively Geeta would use Glimmora as her partner Pokémon and ace in battle. But the way the Pokémon is built as a setup Pokémon through its Toxic Debris ability, which lays out Toxic Spikes on the battlefield after it’s hit with a physical attack, means it doesn’t make sense for it to be utilized this way in battle. All of Geeta’s team just feels like it lacks the same forethought of the rest of the Elite Four. What an odd fight.
After you defeat Geeta, that’s the last time you can face the Elite Four in this sequential structure. This is a departure from previous games, which let you challenge the Pokémon League multiple times. However, you can still face all of these trainers in the postgame Academy Ace Tournament, where their teams will be slightly stronger and have different movesets. Geeta’s team still sucks, though!
Fortnite creator Epic Games will pay a record $520 million to settle allegations that it illegally collected children’s personal information and used “dark patterns” to encourage accidental in-game purchases. What do you think?
“I hope they have a creepy way of making that money back.”
Cliff Zarley • Unemployed
“I blame parents for letting their kids have personal information.”
Mandy Lee • Chief Enunciator
“We let these companies babysit our kids for free, and they betray us like this?”
As Web3 Is Going Just Great’sMolly White reports, the deal was supposed to run for seven years, and involve FTX making “substantial payments” to Riot, starting with $12.5 million for the 2022 calendar year (and escalating to $12.875 for 2023, and so on). So far only $6.25 million of that 2022 sum has been paid, and there is almost zero chance Riot will ever see another cent, so the company has filed a case with a Bankruptcy Court in Delaware seeking to have the rest of the sponsorship deal nullified.
In strictly business terms, that’s perfectly understandable. As Riot points out in their filing, FTX have declared bankruptcy, which should send the whole deal straight into the bin, no questions asked. Just in case anyone does ask questions, though, Riot have added, “There is simply no way for FTX to cure the reputational harm already caused to Riot as a result of the highly public disrepute wrought by the debacle preceding FTX’s bankruptcy filing. FTX cannot turn back the clock and undo the damage inflicted on Riot in the wake of its collapse.”
Prior to, and throughout this media firestorm, Riot’s image and reputation to its customer base, remained inextricably linked to FTX through its former CEO, Mr. Bankman-Fried. Media outlets and Twitter commentators splashed images of Mr. Bankman-Fried playing League of Legends—Riot Games’ game— at the same time that FTX was crashing. Mr. BankmanFried is famous for his affinity for the game. He is well-known among investors to play League of Legends during meetings. He acknowledged on Twitter that he played “a lot more [League of Legends] than you’d expect from someone who routinely trades off sleep vs work.” Even Mr. Bankman-Fried’s ranking in League of Legends has been the subject of online commentary with public figures Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Elon Musk weighing in.
Even back when this deal was first signed, in August 2021, it was agonisingly clear what the endgame for this whole scam was going to be, whether it was video game developers or NBA teams or overly-eager celebrities.
You would think Riot would know this, especially now in the middle of all this, but another part of the filing argues that the FTX deal needs to be terminated because it is preventing the company from further “commercializing the crypto-exchange sponsorship category…currently owned by FTX.” Fool me once, shame on you, etc, etc.
Terastallizing isn’t the only way to power up a Pokémon.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
For most players, Pokémon games are a pretty straightforward affair of attacking enemies’ weaknesses and scoring that sweet one-shot. But Pokémon can become incredibly overwhelming once you start playing competitively. What’s an IV? What’s an EV, if not the cute brown fox who can evolve into a bunch of other, more colorful and elaborate foxes?
In fact, they refer to hidden numbers and background math that competitive players like to tweak and manipulate to create the strongest versions of their favorite ‘mons. EV and IVs stand for Effort Values and Individual Values. These hidden numbers determine the final state of a Pokémon’s six stats, and understanding how they work and how to influence them can give you an upper hand in competitive battling. Let’s take a closer look.
Listen up, students! It’s time to learn how to make your Pokémon the very best.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Not Eevee…EV!
Manipulating Effort Values is quite a time investment, as they’re entirely based on what you expose a Pokémon to as you raise them. Each Pokémon has up to 510 total EV points to distribute among all six stats, but each stat can only have 252 EVs individually.
You raise EVs by using items like vitamins and feathers, which each boost specific stats. Vitamins are the most immediately effective, as each will raise an individual stat by 10 EVs. Before Pokémon Sword and Shield, Vitamins were only effective up to a Pokémon’s first 100 EVs, but now, these items will work to max out an individual stat to the ceiling of 252. Feathers aren’t as powerful, raising an EV by only one point. Pretty straightforward so far, but influencing a Pokémon’s EVs while you train them in battle requires a little more planning.
Every Pokémon you battle grants specific EV boosts when defeated, often reflective of its own base stats. The amount of EVs you’ll get per stat depends on how powerful the Pokémon you’re fighting is. For example, if your Pokémon beats a Pichu, it will add one EV point added to your creature’s Speed stat. However, if you’re fighting its fully-evolved form Raichu, that will net you three Speed EV points. If you felt so compelled, you could go beat up a bunch of unsuspecting Pichu to raise a Pokémon’s Speed EVs, but you’ll hit the stat-specific 252 limit much faster if you’re battling more powerful Pokémon.
Some Pokémon don’t dump all their EVs into a single stat like Raichu does, however. Take Butterfree, for example. It divides its three EVs into Special Attack and Special Defense. So while there are better Pokémon to fight for either individual stat, defeating Pokémon who earn you a spread of EVs is a way to raise multiple EVs at once. It’s just a matter of your goals for stat raising and how you want to spend your time.
One thing worth noting about EVs is that, because modern Pokémon games allow an entire party to gain experience after battles, EVs gained are shared through your party as they gain experience, even if they’re not on the field. So be mindful of what you’re training against and what Pokémon you have waiting in the wings to join the fight, as their EVs will be influenced by these battles even if you’re not using them directly.
Grinding EV can take some time, but you can speed up the process of raising specific EV stats by equipping Pokémon with power items that correlate with a specific stat, such as the Power Anklet that increases Speed EVs, or the Power Belt that increases Defense EVs. All of these are purchasable at Delibird Presents stores for $10,000 each.
This man will help your Pokémon overcome their natural stat deficiencies.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
“The circumstances of one’s birth are irrelevant”
Individual Values, known as IV, are a bit more complicated. IVs are essentially Pokémon genetics, in that these are stat boosts inherent to the specific Pokémon you have, which range from zero points to 31 points. Once unchangeable, the Pokémon series has implemented various ways to influence them over the years.
Imagine you had two level 100 Raichus and one had 31 Speed IVs and the other had zero. Even if you trained these two Raichus exactly the same way and curated the same EV build, the one that was born with 31 Speed IVs would have a Speed stat 31 points higher than the other. A lot of competitive players will breed Pokémon to try and attain optimal IVs, as parent Pokémon pass on higher IVs based on their own to their offspring.
In more recent games, Pokémon has given players the ability to “Hyper Train” their ‘mons to increase their IVs in exchange for Bottle Caps. This can be done in locations like Montenevera in Scarlet and Violet by talking to a trainer standing close to the town’s Pokémon Center. Bottle Caps can be hard to come by. You can buy them at the Delibird Presents stores around Paldea, but they’re pretty pricey at $20,000 per cap. You can also win them in high-level tera raids, but often just as a random drop. So while it might seem more immediate to be able to use Hyper Training, acquiring those Bottle Caps can take time, which is why some players opt to max out a Ditto’s IVs and use it to breed better versions of whatever Pokémon they’re trying to raise.
My Raichu is not EV/IV optimized, I’m simply showing you the menu where you look at them. Do not yell at me. He is a good boy.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
“Just tell them that it’s Pokémon nature”
But no matter what a Pokémon’s EVs and IVs are, a few additional factors will determine whether or not it’s is inherently effective in certain builds compared to others.
Each Pokémon has a set of base stats inherent to its species that grow as you raise your critter, and the direction those numbers go will be determined by how its EVs and IVs pan out. Raichu’s base stats position it as a fast, special attack-driven Pokémon. It has a base speed stat of 110, and its special attack stat of 95 outshines its base physical attack, which is 85.
This helps you determine what attacks are probably most effective for it to learn. Its physical attack stat is still respectable, but at a glance, Raichu is meant to primarily be a special attacker. Understanding EVs and IVs can help you shift those scales, or at the very least make up for certain deficiencies. Raichu’s base physical defense stat is much lower than the rest, coming in at just 50, so if you wanted to help make up for that, raising its IVs through Hyper Training or fighting Pokémon that naturally raise physical defense EVs can help it bulk up a little. But those base stats can be influenced by another factor that can play into how you divvy up your EVs and IVs: Natures.
Alongside its universal base stats as a species, every individual Pokémon you come across will also come with a Nature. These appear in the status summary screens as a means to give you a sense of your Pokémon’s personality, but they also determine one increased stat and one decreased stat. As such, some players will breed multiple versions of a Pokémon in an effort to get one with the most desirable Nature and stat distribution for the build they want.
There are 25 total Natures in Pokémon games right now, and the stats they increase and decrease are as follows, courtesy of Serebii:
Hardy: No change Lonely: Attack/Defense Brave: Attack/Speed Adamant: Attack/Special Attack Naughty: Attack/Special Defense Bold: Defense/Attack Docile: No change Relaxed: Defense/Speed Impish: Defense/Speed Lax: Defense/Special Defense Timid: Speed/Attack Hasty: Speed/Defense Serious: No change Jolly: Speed/Special Attack Naive: Speed/Special Defense Modest: Special Attack/Attack Mild: Special Attack/Defense Quiet: Special Attack/Speed Bashful: No Change Rash: Special Attack/Special Defense Calm: Special Defense/Attack Gentle: Special Defense/Defense Sassy: Special Defense/Speed Careful: Special Defense/Special Attack Quirky: No Change
While Natures themselves are fixed, Sword and Shield introduced Mints, a new set of items that can change the stat distribution associated with them. For example, a Modest Mint will increase a Pokémon’s Special Attack, but reduce the Attack stat as if the Pokémon’s Nature had changed. This won’t change the actual personality it talks about in their summary (that would be brainwashing), but it will allow you to tweak their stats for any competitive schemes you might have in mind.
He’s happy because I just told him we’re going to go change up his EV/IVs so the Kotaku comments won’t roast him for his unoptimized build.Screenshot: The Pokémon Company / Kotaku
Different pokés for different folks
All of these moving parts can be a lot to keep track of, and these mechanics are really there for the sickest of competitive sickos. It can be rewarding to get a Pokémon to the competitive state you want and see them excel in battles, but it’s also a huge time investment to get your team’s numbers precisely dialed in. But if you’re curious about the world of competitive Pokémon, understanding EVs and IVs is a good metric for whether or not this side of the scene is for you. And if it’s not, you can still do cool tera raids with your friends, like the ongoing Charizard one happening in Scarlet and Violet right now.
Blizzard is now taking pre-orders on a large, nearly $100 special Diablo IV collector’s box which includes many things. But it doesn’t include the game. And while Blizzard isn’t trying to trick people into accidentally buying this game-free box, it still seems very odd that there’s not even an option to get the game with this pricey package of demonic goodies.
Expensive collector’s editions of video games and movies have become more and more popular over the last decade. Personally, I never felt the need for all the random gubbins and statues usually included in these pricey bundles, but I get it. Some folks just really love to collect everything involving their favorite franchise or series. Whatever floats your boat! Just don’t get confused and think this $100 Diablo IV Collector’s Box actually includes the game it’s named after!
This week, Blizzard started taking pre-orders on something it’s calling the Diablo IV Limited Collector’s Box over on its merch store. This large, spiffy-looking box will cost you a cool $96.66 (I see what you did there…) and includes all of these items:
Occult Mousepad
Cloth Map of Sanctuary
Pin of the Horadrim
Diablo IV Collector’s Edition Art Book
Matted Fine Art Prints (x2) – 18.54″ x 10.79″
That’s very nice and all, but you’ll notice that the game isn’t part of this pricey bundle. Now, Blizzard isn’t trying to deceive anyone. It’s clear in the store description that this box doesn’t contain the game. It also isn’t selling the box on Battle.net but instead on its merch site, further separating it from its video game store. So I’m not trying to imply that Blizzard is trying to pull a fast one and trick diehard Diablo players into forking over $100 for something that doesn’t include the upcoming ARPG. I’m just saying it’s a bit odd, is all!
I guess for folks who prefer buying a digital copy of the game via a third-party site or who might want to provide a physical gift to someone who might already have the game pre-ordered, this is a nice idea. But why not have a different version that is $60-70 more and includes a code for the game? Or even a discount on it! Though that kind of stuff might make things more confusing.
This is my cat. Imagine the game is called Cult of the Cat. Image: Massive Monster / Devolver Digital / Kotaku
2022 wasn’t just the year that I started here at Kotaku, or the year that I accidentally went viral for daring to ask rich guys to dress nice at awards shows—it was also the year that I forced myself to stretch outside of my comfort zone.
I am a video game jock, always searching for the high of a win earned in buzzer-beater plays through solid communication amongst teammates. I spend most of my spare time playing competitive shooters in an attempt to mimic the feeling I get when I PR at the gym, or beat our rival co-ed footy team after an especially physical match. Much like how I am as an athlete or just a regular ol’ civilian, I’m not a fan of trying new things that I could potentially be bad at. It’s why I quit guitar lessons after a month, why I doggedly refuse to go bowling, why I can only do karaoke if I am absolutely pickled drunk.
But this year, I tried some new stuff—and not all of it was technically new. I took competitive breaks from Overwatch 2 with round after round of Marvel Snap. I sunk hours into Elden Ring after swearing off Soulslikes. I gave Cyberpunk 2077 an actual effort, rather than just ragging on it to anyone who would listen. I wouldn’t say this is the most well-rounded GOTY list you’ll find here at Kotaku, but it’s indicative of my growth as a gamer.
I can try new things, and I can like them. Just don’t fucking take me bowling.
Overwatch 2
Screenshot: Blizzard / Kotaku
Its battle pass isn’t great, its cosmetics are too expensive (people want loot boxes back, for fuck’s sake), and as a healer main I’m still tired of getting my ass beat in 5v5 combat, but Overwatch 2 has consumed me ever since its launch. It’s the only game I play consistently with people I also hang out with in real life; we send each other daily texts as the workday nears its close that just read “ow?” Then, we spend the night ignoring our respective partners and screaming bizarre Overwatch slang into our headsets.
With Overwatch 1 dead and gone, Overwatch 2 is the only way to scratch my hero shooter itch. And even though there are aspects of it that bring me great pain (the move towards a more generic, shooter-y shooter being the main issue), I still get so much satisfaction from a hard-fought comp win. I’m an Overwatch-er for life, sadly. I wish I knew how to quit you.
Cult of the Lamb
Image: Massive Monster / Devolver Digital
Not long into my Cult of the Lamb playthrough, one of my cultists (a cow my partner named Cunty), tells me that he wants to eat shit. Literally. He has always wanted to try and eat poop. So, I go and collect some shit produced by a fellow cultist of his, cook it up into a meal, and serve it to him. He’s happy. He’s more of a believer. I’m assuming this is what Scientology is like.
Cult of the Lamb is pretty much this all the way through: dumb fun that looks really good. I find I enjoy the village cultivation more than I enjoy the roguelike elements, but the latter is so simple and solid that it’s easy to zone out and spend a few hours hacking away at enemies. Then, when you return to your village, there’s always something stupid waiting for you, whether it’s a dissenter talking shit or a loyal follower eating it.
Marvel Snap
Screenshot: Second Dinner / Kotaku
When I first joined Kotaku, everyone was deep in the throes of Marvel Snap. I felt a little left out and wanted to make myself likable as quickly as possible, so I downloaded the mobile card battler on my first day in office. The rest, my little goblin friends, is history—Snap consumed my every waking moment whether I was on the subway, walking to the subway, waiting for the subway, in-between rounds of Overwatch 2 comp, or on the toilet (the latter of which I’m sure my gastroenterologist will be very upset with me about).
For a while, I stuck with a build that another Kotaku staffer had helped me out with, but then, as my Snap senses improved, I started building decks to purposefully fuck with other players. Now, I am the Snap devil. I’ve only been here a few weeks and I am insufferable. I’ve been told by loved ones that the horrific, evil giggle that escapes me when I hit an enemy player with Elektra one turn, then Killmonger the next, then Shang-Chi after that is concerning, and I would have to agree.
Destiny 2: The Witch Queen
Screenshot: Bungie / Kotaku
Bungie’s best bit is coming around once a year to remind you that it still makes some of the best campaigns of all time. The Destiny 2 conversation so often gets bogged down in sunsetting content, skill-based matchmaking drama, and the value (or lack thereof) of the grind, but when an expansion like The Witch Queen drops it’s all anyone can talk about—and for good reason.
The story of Savathûn managed to fill gaps in Destiny lore, establish her as the best villain the game has ever seen, and lay out a path for the ideological struggles that will continue into the franchise’s future. It was a legible hunk of narrative meat (a rarity for Destiny, which needs video explainers to explain its video explainers) that cashed in on plot threads Bungie has been spinning for years. Plus the Witch Queen gave us a sick raid and new Void abilities for players to go gaga over. Destiny good.
Stray
Photo: Alyssa Mercante / Annapurna Interactive
I am NYC certified in Trap-Neuter-Return and cat colony management and I have three rescue cats (one of which I caught and socialized myself), so of course I love the cat game. It’s a game where you play as a cat and do cat things. There are cat sounds. My cats like the cat sounds and sometimes they watch me play—this is all very wholesome shit.
Stray isn’t going to break any boundaries but it is going to let you scratch up a couch like a cat would, and it does feature some of the prettiest level design of the year. I’m also a huge fan of how the robot NPCs react to your little cat: I will never forget when I jumped up on a surface and interrupted two of them playing a tabletop game, just to trot past them a few minutes later and see them still struggling to pick up all the pieces.
Neon White
Image: Annapurna Interactive
Neon White is crazy, sexy, cool. This game has it all: pop-art visuals, speedrunning mechanics, a soundtrack from Machine Girl, and a collection of attractive demons called Neons competing to purge heaven of their demonic ilk. It’s hard to define Neon White, as it feels almost like the anti-game-genre game—there are FPS elements, sure, but there’s also dating sim stuff, and a lot of platforming. There’s cards, but it’s not a deck builder. It’s got puzzles. You’ll speed through some of its levels in under 20 seconds, while larger, boss-y levels may take you a few minutes—but nothing in Neon White will eat up your time unless you let it. Trust me, you’ll let it.
Apex Legends
Image: Respawn
Apex Legends is always there for me when I need it. It’ll lay dormant in my gaming pile for months, but whenever I return, it consistently gives me the tight, focused shooter gameplay I crave after some wonky Warzone 2.0 matches or a frustrating Overwatch loss. Apex Legends is one of the best live-service games out there right now thanks to a near-perfect mix of new content, necessary patches, and smart, measured updates. Respawn is always shaking up the maps and weapon pool just enough to keep the game fresh, but not too much that it upends its impressively precarious balance.
Catalyst, the game’s latest playable character, dropped just in time to obliterate an annoying meta that had been building up for months, and brought with her yet another reminder that Respawn is one of the few popular games unafraid to center trans and non-binary folk. That’s probably why I find members of the alphabet army in so many of my Apex Legends lobbies—and I live for it. Apex Legends is my safety net. It will always be on any GOTY list of mine.
Cyberpunk 2077
Screenshot: CD Projekt Red / Kotaku
Like many who participated in the two-year wait for Cyberpunk 2077 to become playable, I finally decided to try out CD Projekt Red’s latest RPG this year. From the moment I saw the character creator, I knew that it was going to be the kind of time-suck game that would threaten my relationships, gym sessions, and personal hygiene. I pored over every inch of my V, from her buzzed head to the smattering of freckles across her cheeks. I agonized over her body mods and tattoos. When I finally left the character creator and started playing the game, I’d pause and take screenshots anytime her shiny chrome nails were in view.
When I give myself the time to get lost in Night City, I get lost lost, and emerge blinking into the sunlight of the real world half a day later, crunchy thumpy techno music still ringing in my ears.
Weird West
Image: WolfEye Studios
I previewed this top-down, twin-stick RPG from Raphael Colantonio last year and it was absolutely brutal. It’s still just as brutal today, but getting some proper time with it helps drive home that this is a rock-solid immersive sim set in a supremely cool world. Undead miners and sirens lurk everywhere in this alternate-universe Wild West, but along with an arsenal of weapons you’ve got ample opportunity to use the environment to keep yourself alive.
And the world of Weird West remembers. At one point, I hired a bodyguard to accompany me across the plains because I was sick of getting my ass kicked. Together, we successfully made it through a tough section, but as we emerged into the next area and got jumped by some zombies, I accidentally lit him on fire. I didn’t think much of it as he died in front of my eyes, but I did pause to rifle through his pockets for spare change. Hours later, when I returned to the town where we first met, an NPC sitting near the saloon was mourning their lost family member. “Oops,” I mumbled under my breath. Weird West doesn’t want you to think of its characters as disposable, asshole.
Elden Ring
Screenshot: FromSoftware / Kotaku
Until Elden Ring, I was a proud Soulslike hater. The games were the epitome of everything I despise: frustratingly difficult, punishingly cruel, and full of gamers with superiority complexes. I had tried and failed to play both Dark Souls Remastered and Bloodborne and wanted no part of Elden Ring—until it was revealed that you’d be able to freely roam through its world, avoiding annoying early-game bosses and honing your abilities so that you’d be strong enough to take that boss down with one flourish of your staff.
From the moment I rose as a Tarnished in the Lands Between, I knew that this was the kind of title that would be considered a benchmark in gaming history. For it to live up to and exceed the hype that surrounded it for years is something special, but what’s remarkable is how Elden Ring ushered in an entirely new player base thanks to its open-world opportunities. The flexibility of Elden Ring and its beautiful, bizarre world made me FromSoft-pilled, and now I’m ready to go through the studio’s entire portfolio.
