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Evidently continuing to assert herself as the reigning queen of making Taurus anthems (sorry Adele [though “Someone Like You” still slaps, particularly as a Taurus anthem/torch song]), with “Taste” (not to be confused with Sophie Ellis-Bextor’s) and “Please Please Please” being some of the pinnacles of what that means, Sabrina Carpenter has released yet another one: “Tears.” Marking the second hit single from Man’s Best Friend (following “Manchild”), it’s very much in keeping with the tropes of this specific zodiac sign—more to the point, her specific zodiac sign. And yes, it was Carpenter herself who once said, “My favorite thing about being a Taurus is that I get to use the excuse ‘I’m sorry I’m a Taurus.’ It kinda works in every facet of life.”
Not least of which is lusting after a man who’s responsible, reliable and “good around the house.” For there’s nothing a Taurus loves more than someone who not only respects the sanctity of their domestic space, but even seeks to further elevate it. For their (usually-not-so-humble) abode is an environment they especially deem their “kingdom” (though they tend to see most everywhere else as part of their “dominion,” too). And, considering that Carpenter has been on tour for the past two years (embarking on the Short n’ Sweet Tour from 2024 to 2025), it’s no wonder she would deliver such comforts-of-home-craving lines as, “Assemble a chair from Ikea, I’m like, ‘Uh.’” Granted, the unabashed decadence of Taurean tastes means you won’t typically find them anywhere near an Ikea. Particularly with a limitless budget like Carpenter’s.
What they can be found near, however, are spooky houses with sumptuous interiors, as is the case with the Rocky Horror Picture Show-inspired video that accompanies the track. For what is a Taurus if not adventurous and naughty, paired with a dichotomous penchant for desiring luxury, debauchery and comfort? Then, of course, there’s the “problem” of being ruled by Venus, which applies not just to the planet, but to the goddess also known as Aphrodite. Her sensual nature, which makes the frequently-depicted-in-the-buff deity a natural fit for embodying the Goddess of Love, is what extends to the sign she reigns over, with the Taurus’ sense of raunchiness (and, as Carpenter also represents, general horniness)—e.g., “I get wet at the thought of you/Being a responsible guy…/Tears run down my thighs—getting them into almost as much trouble as their stubbornness.
Regarding the raunch factor, it’s at least part of what draws “innocent” (even if only in appearance) Carpenter to the abandoned-looking ramshackle of a house after her incompetent boyfriend apparently got them into a car crash. Then, like Alice down the rabbit hole or Dorothy in Oz, Carpenter stumbles upon a “land” that makes everything suddenly feel like it’s in Technicolor, having formerly existed in a bland, black-and-white way in the life she shared with her now-presumed-dead boyfriend. But Carpenter’s Easter Sunday appearance quickly gives way to clothes coming off (quite literally) as she dances and prances with Colman Domingo (a Sag cusping Scorpio, Taurus’ opposite on the zodiac wheel, which also makes Scorpio something like their diabolical id) in the overt Dr. Frank-N-Furter role. A pied piper bringing out all of Carpenter’s inner kink. On this note, it seems an unfair (and inaccurate) stereotype that Taureans are also often accused of being “boring” when, in fact, that couldn’t be further from the truth. For their love of “responsibility” is matched only by their love of fun and beauty (these things, increasingly, often being what only money can buy and, therefore, part of the Taurean obsession with making as much of it as possible).
This love of fun and beauty is what Carpenter embodies in the Bardia Zeinali-directed video (following what he did for another one of Carpenter’s Taurus anthems, “Please Please Please”). Her Taurean fervor for the heady combination of vibrant aesthetics and sensuality reaches an especial crescendo as she “just happens to find herself” in frilly lingerie while pole-dancing in some nearby cornfield. And not just because, as an Earth sign, Carpenter can’t help but show some love for “the land.” With cornfields also being a “necessary” cliché in many horror movies (see, most recently: Pearl, with the eponymous character putting her own “sexy spin” on what a cornfield can provide, mood-wise…apart from just creepiness). But the “horror” (or horror-comedy, considering the movie it pays homage to) pastiche of “Tears” is wielded, ultimately, to emphasize a “pure” and “wholesome” girl (read: a Taurus) coming to terms with her irrepressible sexuality (read: a Taurus at war with their so-called dark side). Much like Janet Weiss (Susan Sarandon) in The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
By the same token, what awakens the sexual gratitude in a Taurus are the very “normie,” Hestia-oriented types of things Carpenter brings up when she declares, “A little respect for women can get you very, very far/Remembering how to use your phone gets me oh so, oh so hot/Considering I have feelings, I’m like, ‘Why are my clothes still on?’/Offering to do anything, I’m like, ‘Oh my God.’” And, of course, the domesticity “codedness” of, “I get wet at the thought of you/Being a responsible guy/Treating me like you’re supposed to do/Tears run down my thighs” can’t be overemphasized enough. Mixing the pure and the profane as only a Taurus can with that chorus (no rhyme intended), Carpenter then continues, “A little initiative can go a very long, long way/Baby, just do the dishes, I’ll give you what you, what you want/A little communication, yes, that’s my ideal foreplay.”
It doesn’t get more “banal” than that—and yet, this expression of “just wanting some safeness and dependability” is spiced up in a manner that only a Taurus can do it, with their keen ability to infuse the quotidian with a much-needed tincture of sexiness and sassiness. A skill that, lately, Carpenter has been quite keen to flex. Because, yes, a bit of a “nobody does it better” attitude is also part and parcel of being a “standard” Taurus. Along with plenty of snark “hidden” behind that false veneer of “being slow” (or slow-talking).
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Genna Rivieccio
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