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Tag: socializing

  • 4 Signs Your Dog Is Over Holiday Socializing | Animal Wellness Magazine

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    Holidays can be full of parties and socializing, and it’s natural for us to want to include our dogs in these celebrations. But many dogs, like humans, may have a limit for how much socializing and partying they’re up for. Knowing when your dog has had enough holiday socializing is an important part of keeping everyone safe.

    Should Fido Be at the Gathering?

    The first thing to consider is whether or not you should even include your dog in holiday gatherings. You need to know their personality type, as well as their likes and dislikes. For example, if your dog loves people, then a holiday party might be the highlight of their week. However, forcing them to socialize when they don’t want to can make them uncomfortable and potentially put others at risk. Be sure to take your dog’s preferences, and those of your holiday guests, into consideration.

    Social and Behavioral Issues to Think About Before Holiday Socializing

    Is your dog an introvert or extrovert? Do they love meeting new people and hanging out, or do they prefer cozy couch snuggles with their familiar, trusted people? If your dog is more of an introvert or is sensitive to strangers, crowds, or loud noises, then a holiday party may not be the best place for them.

    Does your dog steal or guard food? Party guests won’t be as careful as you are at managing where you put food down, especially if there will be kids at the party.

    Does your dog jump to greet or otherwise have less than perfect manners? This may be fine when it’s you alone, but if there will be children or elderly people attending, a dog jumping on them could be dangerous.

    Finally, will there be children? If so, who is going to be supervising dog and child interactions? You can’t assume dogs and kids will be comfortable with each other, and there should always be adult supervision.

    4 Signs Your Dog Might Be Done with Holiday Socializing

    1. They Stop Greeting New People Coming In

    If your dog is normally a social butterfly and they stop greeting people coming or going, that could indicate they’re tired or have had enough.

    2. They Start to Avoid or Retreat for Some Peace and Quiet

    If you notice your dog starts to avoid interactions, like walking away if someone tries to engage with them or ducking their head when someone tries to pet them, this could also be a sign they’re done with socializing. More obvious signs would be complete retreat where they go off into a back bedroom or hop out the dog door to escape the chaos of the party.

    3. They Get Clingy with You

    Some dogs may get clingy to you, their trusted, familiar adult, hoping you’ll give them relief from the situation. If you ignore this plea, the dog may decide they need to take more drastic measures to ask for relief, like snapping or vocalizing.

    4. They Get Aggressive

    Dog aggression, which can look like growling, barking, lunging, snapping, or biting, doesn’t usually happen out of the blue. In fact, there are usually earlier, less subtle signs of stress or discomfort, such as:

    • Yawning
    • Lip licking
    • Hard stare
    • Whale eye

    Once a dog’s subtle communication signs have been ignored, they may escalate their communication to be louder and clearer to tell you they need space or relief from the situation.

    Knowing your dog’s social limits, preferences, and communication is essential for happy, safe holiday socializing and will protect guests and your dog from discomfort.

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    Kate LaSala, CTC, CBCC-KA, PCBC-A, CSAT, owner of Rescued by Training, is a multi-credentialed behavior consultant specializing in fear, aggression, and separation anxiety, helping dogs and their people worldwide. She is also a pet death doula, supporting grief and loss, including stigmatized experiences such as behavioral euthanasia and rehoming cases.

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    Kate LaSala

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  • Third Spaces: The Building Blocks of A Healthy Community and Social Life

    Third Spaces: The Building Blocks of A Healthy Community and Social Life

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    Third spaces are public, informal gathering spots — like cafes, parks, or community centers — where people can relax, socialize, and build connections outside of home and work. In a world increasingly dominated by digital interactions, these spaces play a vital role in fostering community and countering loneliness.


    “Third spaces” refer to social environments that are separate from the two primary places where people spend most of their time: home (the first space) and work (the second space). These third spaces are informal, public gathering spots where people can socialize, relax, and build a sense of community.

    Sociologist Ray Oldenburg first introduced the concept in his book The Great Good Place. He argued that third spaces are crucial for fostering social cohesion, civic engagement, and a sense of belonging. They serve as “neutral grounds” where people can engage in casual conversations and form social connections that they might not in other settings. Places like main streets, libraries, cafes, pubs, and community centers are essential to a functional society and can provide avenues for grassroots activism, community involvement, charity and volunteer work, and social support.

    One of the most important features of “third spaces” is that they involve interacting with people outside of our typical social circle of family, friends, and coworkers. They introduce the possibility of new connections and new relationships. Other important qualities include easy accessibility, low cost, and an inviting atmosphere that encourages mingling and conversation.

    As modern life has shifted more towards digital interaction, the role of physical third spaces has become a topic of renewed interest among psychologists and social scientists, especially in discussions about loneliness and community fragmentation. People are spending less time in third spaces than ever before; and with remote work becoming more common, many people don’t have much of a life outside of home anymore.

    This general tendency has led to an increase in atomization, where individuals feel less and less connected to their local communities and society at large. This has far reaching consequences on health and well-being, as well as social trust, cooperation, and group cohesion.

    Third spaces play an integral role when it comes to happiness and well-being on both an individual and social level. Let’s mention a few common examples and then explore more on what makes these spaces so important to a healthy social life.

    Common examples of third spaces include:

    • Main streets and public squares
    • Cafes and coffee shops
    • Public libraries
    • Parks, nature preserves, beaches
    • Bars or pubs
    • Community centers
    • Bookstores
    • Churches and religious organizations
    • Local food markets
    • Music venues or dance clubs
    • Local sports leagues (bowling, basketball, baseball, etc.)
    • Shopping malls
    • Co-working spaces

    Can you think of any other examples? What are some neutral places where various people can go to meet new people?

    Ray Oldenburg argues that the increase of suburbanization and a “car-centric” society has decreased the use of third spaces and is one major cause behind our more atomized and individualistic world. Many adults living in suburbs have a long commute and a busy work schedule, so they rarely have time to spend outside of home or work. They live and sleep in their suburban homes, but they aren’t involved in their local communities in any meaningful way.

    Modern living creates a fundamental disconnect between home, work, and community, which can lead to feelings of alienation and loneliness. Third spaces can be a social glue that ties these different aspects of our lives together into a meaningful whole.

    As someone who grew up in Levittown, New York – one of the first mass-produced suburbs – I can relate to the feelings of atomization and not having many third spaces to hang out with friends during my childhood. The most frequent spots were typically shopping malls, bowling alleys, or parking lots, but there weren’t many other “public square”-type places where everyone could go on a weekend night. This made it difficult to build social connections or a sense of community outside of school.

    In Robert Putnam’s classic book Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of the American Community, he documents the downfall of community feeling and social cohesion since the 1960s. Key factors behind this decline include changes in mobility and sprawl, family structure and time schedules, as well as technology and mass media. The rise of home entertainment including TVs, internet, and video games has made people less motivated to go to physical third spaces for leisure, socializing, or relaxation.

    There are many factors that have led to the decline in community and the use of third spaces. It’s tempting to want to blame only one thing, but the problems we face in today’s world are complicated and multifaceted. There’s no quick or easy fix for improving the use of third spaces, but we can be more aware of the role they play in our daily lives.

    Are Buses and Trains Third Spaces?

    Public transportation such as buses and trains share some qualities with “third spaces,” such as being neutral ground that anyone in the community can access, a shared experience of commuting together, and the possibility of social connection with locals and strangers. However, these places are typically not seen as “third spaces” because their primary function is transportation and not social connection. The average person on commutes tends to withdraw and mind their own business, so these spaces aren’t very conducive to new conversation or forming new friendships (although it’s definitely possible).

    Building Social Capital and Weak Ties

    When you frequent any third space (such as a cafe, bar, church, or library), you naturally start to see familiar faces and build light social connections there.

    This is what sociologists refer to as social capital, which is just an economic-centric term for relationships that we value, trust, and provide social support.

    Third spaces help form casual relationships (or “weak ties”) that can lead to huge benefits. One common example is learning about a new job opportunity or a possible romantic interest through an acquaintance or friend of a friend.

    Social capital can manifest itself in many small and hidden ways too.

    When I lived in Brooklyn, I would go to the same bodega every morning for my coffee and breakfast sandwich. There were a couple times I was in a rush and forgot my wallet, but since the store owner knew me well and recognized me, he trusted me enough to let me pay next time. That may seem like a trivial thing, but it’s something that can only be accomplished with a minimal level of trust or social capital. If I were a completely random stranger I wouldn’t get that benefit.

    Through third spaces, you begin to run into the same people, build a sense of familiarity and comfort, and start connecting with them on a level beyond random stranger, even just the act of seeing a familiar face and saying “Hi” can give a nice boost to your day (learn the power of “10 second” relationships).

    Find a Healthy Dose of Third Spaces

    No matter how introverted or extraverted you are, everyone needs a healthy dose of social interaction. Third spaces provide opportunities to meet new people, connect with a broader community, and expand our social circle. Often just finding one third space where you feel comfortable and connect with like-minded people can make a big difference in the quality of your social life. Find a third space that works best for you and make it a part of your daily, weekly, or monthly routine.


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    Steven Handel

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  • New Survey Reveals That Covid Has Turned Many Homeowners Into Homebodies

    New Survey Reveals That Covid Has Turned Many Homeowners Into Homebodies

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    Covid turned many Americans into homebodies, according to the Research Institute for Cooking and Kitchen Intelligence. In its recently released “RICKI 2022 Changes Driven by the Pandemic” survey sent to more than 1,000 homeowners, the research consultancy sought to learn how respondents’ pandemic experiences impacted their relationships with their homes, especially in the kitchen, what changes they’ve made, and how their attitudes have shifted as a result of this massive disruption.

    Greater Desire to Be Home

    One response that leaped from the RICKI survey was 64% of surveyed homeowners strongly agreeing that “I have a greater desire to be home now than I did before the pandemic.” How might this be showing up in home remodeling plans?

    One trend is increased requests for wine and coffee centers by kitchen project clients, facilitating the kind of socializing that was next to impossible during the first months of the pandemic. This has spurred more product releases that help store wine, serve beer and brew coffee at home.

    Steve Smith, CEO of high end Southern California retail chain Pirch shared in trade magazine Kitchen & Bath Design News’ annual Trend Spotting wrap-up last November, “We used to sell built-in coffee machines in one out of 10 kitchens, and now it’s more like three or four out of 10. Customers want to put in their own version of either a bar or a soft drink center, so their homes are better equipped for entertaining. Anything that allows people to entertain in their home has become a must-have.”

    Another area where the pandemic’s influence has shown up is the continued popularity of outdoor living spaces for socializing and relaxation, which are larger, more luxurious and better equipped than ever before. Climate control features extending their use into the hotter and colder months include fans and misters for the hotter months and fire features for the colder ones. Materials like porcelain slab countertops and decking also make these spaces heat and frost resistant.

    Home fitness continues to be popular – even though, as noted here recently, those spaces may be smaller and multi-use in some regions – so that time-pressed, health-conscious homeowners can get a workout in without driving to a gym or sharing showers.

    My Home Makes Me Happier Now

    Covid showed homeowners where their homes were serving them poorly, and a burst of remodeling activity followed to redress some of those issues. For example, the National Kitchen & Bath Association’s 2022 Trends Summary of industry professionals noted that clients have been choosing easy to clean, sanitary surfaces; hands-free faucets; paints that don’t off-gas, and universal design features that accommodate aging in place, all of which contribute to peace of mind. They’re also adding comfort features like radiant flooring, bathroom storage with outlets for beauty tools, and large islands for entertaining.

    Mental well-being showed up as the top priority for 60% of surveyed homeowners in the John Burns Research & Consulting’s January 2023 Healthy Homes survey, described in this April 11 Forbes.com article. Features that enhance peace of mind definitely support that priority!

    I Am Spending More Time in My Kitchen Now

    There are several factors that likely have 50% of the RICKI survey respondents strongly agreeing that they’re spending more time in the kitchen now than they did pre-pandemic. These include early restaurant shutdowns, the drive to use time at home in creative new ways during COVID, the links between healthy eating and reducing COVID co-morbidities, and inflation creating the need to get smarter about shopping and meal preparation.

    The NKBA survey points out that homeowners are planning their kitchen redesigns for more than just cooking though. Islands are getting larger, the report notes, with 62% wanting eating areas and 59% wanting areas for their kids to complete their homework and school assignments. Also high on 64% of homeowners’ kitchen wish lists in the NKBA study is space to charge and view their phones, tablets and laptops.

    I’m Much More Knowledgeable About Cooking

    That extra time in the kitchen has led 43% of RICKI respondents to agree strongly that they feel better prepared to create meals for themselves and their households than they did pre-pandemic. Appliance manufacturers are helping in this regard, with built-in recipe helpers, cooking app tie-ins and remote operation, letting you check on your oven’s progress from your home office to avoid burning your food. Half of the NKBA respondents (50%) say clients want mobile apps to control their appliances.

    It’s also driving interest in newer, more advanced appliances like ovens with steam or air frying capabilities (63% of NKBA respondents), induction cooktops with smart ventilation and enhanced refrigeration with flex drawers that switch from fridge to freezer to wine cooling.

    While pro-style gas ranges and cooktops have been popular for decades now, the NKBA Report shows “induction popularity expected to climb into mainstream” in the next three years. The 2022 report had induction popularity at 42% versus gas at 46%. Recent studies on the health risks associated with gas cooking and regional bans on gas lines to homes will likely drive those numbers much higher.

    The home cooking trend is also spurring remodels with better pantry storage. The NKBA survey reported a 60% interest in these spaces. Not only do they accommodate food storage, they also often include countertop appliances to help in meal prep, storage for serving pieces and pro-style sinks for prep and cleanup.

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    Jamie Gold, Contributor

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