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Tag: Social

  • Social Bonding Through Movies: The Emotional Magic Behind Watching Films Together

    Social Bonding Through Movies: The Emotional Magic Behind Watching Films Together

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    Movies can be an excellent social bonding experience in a variety of situations, including first dates, family movie nights, group watches, couples therapy, and professional settings. Learn more about the emotional dynamics behind watching films together.


    Beyond being a source of entertainment, films have the power to foster social bonds and create shared experiences among individuals.

    Whether it’s getting together at a friend’s house on a weekend night, embarking on a first date at the theaters, or upholding a family tradition of watching the same movie during holidays, watching movies together is one of the most common ways we connect with others.

    But what’s the psychology behind these cinematic connections? Let’s dive into the many social benefits behind movie watching and how they can improve our relationships in a number of different social settings.

    Shared Experiences

    Every time you press “Play” on a new movie, you are starting a collective journey with whoever you are watching with. No one knows what will happen, so you are both entering the unknown together and experiencing it for the first time.

    Every film is a rollercoaster of different emotions – joy, laughter, surprise, fear, suspense, disgust, sadness, anger – and everyone is experiencing those emotions together as a “hive mind.” Research shows emotions are contagious, and when multiple people are experiencing the same emotion in unison, feelings are often amplified more than if you were just experiencing it by yourself.

    Movies create new shared experiences that mark new chapters throughout our relationship. “Remember that one time we saw Wolf on Wall Street? That was fun!” A memorable movie can become a distinct event in our relationship’s storyline, especially if it symbolizes a special day like a first date, birthday, or anniversary, giving us a positive memory to look back on and reminisce about.

    Watching movies together doesn’t require much work, it effortlessly creates a sense of unity among the people watching. Even if everyone hates the movie, it still creates a shared bond, “Wow, that movie was really stupid!” and then you can all laugh about it.

    Icebreaker and Conversation Starter

    Watching films together serves as an excellent icebreaker, especially in situations where individuals may be meeting for the first time or trying to strengthen new connections.

    The movie theater, often considered a classic venue for a first date, provides a natural conversation starter. After the credits roll, initiating a conversation becomes as easy as asking, “Did you like the movie? Why or why not?” Ask about favorite scenes or whether they’ve seen other movies featuring the same actor or actress.

    Use the film as a springboard into other topics to talk about. If you’re skilled at conversation threading, you should be able to take one thing from the film and branch off into more important subjects. If it’s a film about music, inquire about their musical preferences or whether they play an instrument. For sports-themed movies, explore their favorite sports or childhood sports experiences.

    Icebreakers aren’t exclusive to first dates; they’re equally helpful in building connections in various scenarios, whether it’s getting to know a coworker outside the office or deepening a friendship.

    One fair criticism of movies as a bonding experience is that you don’t get to do much talking during them. It’s a passive experience, not an active one. But there are also benefits to this: it’s a shared experience with little effort (no pressure, just sit and watch), and it gives you a convenient starting point for more meaningful conversation later on.

    Nostalgia and Tradition

    For many, watching films together is not just an occasional activity but a cherished tradition that spans multiple generations.

    Family movie nights play a pivotal role in strengthening the bonds between parents and children. Holiday film marathons, especially during festive seasons, elevate our collective spirit and enhance the joyous atmosphere. Revisiting favorite childhood movies creates a profound sense of nostalgia, keeping us connected to our past.

    One popular family tradition may be during Christmas, such as having A Christmas Story playing in the background as you decorate the tree or watching It’s A Wonderful Life every Christmas eve.

    These traditions are about more than just the movie; they’re about creating a whole family experience. Infuse your own unique twist by turning it into a game, baking homemade cookies before watching, or simply enjoying jokes and good company. The film itself is just one aspect of a complete family ritual and bonding experience.

    When families embrace these shared traditions, they contribute to a profound sense of belonging and unity. These rituals become the threads weaving together the fabric of family ties and friendships over long periods of time.

    Team Building and Group Bonding

    Beyond personal connections, watching films together can be an effective team-building activity in professional settings.

    Organizational unity can be difficult to achieve for many companies, especially when workers have radically different jobs and skillsets, often being assigned to work within one department of a company but being siloed off from the organization as a whole.

    Movie nights and film screenings can be an effective way to provide employees with a stronger sense of unity and camaraderie. Different departments that normally don’t see each other get to cross-pollinate and make connections with faces they don’t often get to see. Scheduled events like this can foster a team of teams mindset, helping to interconnect different departments into a cohesive whole.

    Perhaps certain movies depict an idea, philosophy, or mindset that an organization wants to embrace more of. Requiring every employee to watch a movie together is more than just making friends at work, it can also tap into a deeper meaning behind the organization’s mission and purpose.

    Couples Therapy

    Movies can serve as bouncing points to important conversations that need to be had between spouses and loved ones.

    It’s not always easy to bring up certain topics of conversation, but through film you can organically dive into subjects that otherwise wouldn’t get brought up in everyday discourse, like mental health, sex and intimacy, or experiencing grief after a tragedy or loss.

    It’s common for a couples therapist to recommend a specific movie to their clients. You may already know of a movie that you’d like to share with someone. You can also ask friends or seek recommendations online. Ask yourself, “What’s something I really want to talk about with my partner?” then “What’s a good movie that can introduce this topic?”

    A powerful film can help couples process their relationship more clearly. It shows the universality of humanity – you’re not alone with whatever you are going through – and brings ideas out in the open that need to be expressed or talked about.

    One exercise you can try together is to each take notes or fill out a movie analysis worksheet while watching.

    Communal Bonding and Bridging Social Divides

    On a larger scale, film watching can help bridge cultural and social divides, as well as be used as a tool for communal bonding.

    Social events such as public screenings, outdoor showings, movie festivals, or drive-thru theaters are great settings to watch a movie among a large and diverse group of people within your community.

    These days with easy access to streaming services at home, most people watch movies all by themselves, but there used to be a time when movie-watching was an intrinsically social activity done in public spaces.

    As we continue to see a decline in community feeling, movies may be one avenue to start bringing people together again as a cohesive group.

    One idea is for local organizations to throw more public events with film features to celebrate holidays or special events – or you can set up a projector on your garage door and invite some neighbors for a weekend movie watch.

    Conclusion

    Watching films together is more than just a passive form of entertainment; it is a dynamic social activity that brings people together, creating lasting bonds and shared memories.

    Films are universal connectors. Whether it’s with family, friends, or colleagues, the act of watching a movie together creates an automatic bond and sense of unity.

    Are you a big movie watcher? In what situations can use film watching to improve your relationships with family, friends, loved ones, or coworkers?


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    Steven Handel

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  • Past Relationships Worksheet (PDF)

    Past Relationships Worksheet (PDF)

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    Learn from past love to improve future love. This worksheet will guide you step-by-step so that you can take away the most important lessons from your past relationships.


    Download:

    Past Relationships Worksheet (PDF)

    Read Why It’s Healthy to Reflect on Your Past Relationships for more information.

    Check out more self-improvement worksheets here!

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    Steven Handel

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  • 6 Aspects Of A Balanced Person: A Complete Picture of Well-Being

    6 Aspects Of A Balanced Person: A Complete Picture of Well-Being

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    What are the six aspects of a balanced person? Physical, mental, emotional, social, work/financial, and meaning/spiritual. Learn more about each one and how to improve it!


    In life, there isn’t one single area that we need to focus on that is going to magically fix all of our problems.

    Instead there are multiple dimensions behind every “good life.” Each dimension requires our attention and each contributes to our overall happiness and well-being.

    Here are six aspects of life that come together to create a “balanced person.” By being more aware of these different dimensions in life, we can determine which areas we need to focus on more and work to improve.

    The different aspects of a balanced person include: 1) Physical, 2) Mental, 3) Emotional, 4) Social, 5) Work/Financial and 6) Meaning/Spiritual.

    If we focus too much on any one area, then we risk neglecting another one. For example, if you become solely focused on just work and money, you may end up spending less time taking care of your physical and mental health, or less quality time with family and friends.

    This is a common trap people fall into. They focus all of their energy and effort into one area in life while completely ignoring another. Often they need to reconfigure their core values and priorities before making a meaningful change.

    This is why practicing balance in all things is so important.

    Each of these areas is one piece of a much larger puzzle, and only when you have all of these areas working together harmoniously can you finally build a complete life that serves all of your needs.

    Here’s a detailed breakdown of each aspect of a “balanced person,” along with tips, tools, and practical advice on how you can start improving each one.

    While reading ask yourself, “Which aspect do I need to focus on the most right now? What’s one small change I can make to improve that area?”

    Now let’s dive in…

    1. PHYSICAL WELL-BEING

    health

    The “physical” aspect of life is all about taking care of our health, especially exercise, diet, and sleep.

    This includes what types of foods and drinks we consume on a daily basis, how often we exercise and keep our bodies moving, personal hygiene and cleanliness, as well as minimizing alcohol, smoking, and other harmful habits to our physical health.

    Our body is one of the most precious gifts we have – and without it we can’t exist. If we don’t stay healthy, we often can’t fully enjoy all the other aspects of life such as family, work, traveling, or leisure.

    Our health can often have a spillover effect into all the other aspects of our lives – for that reason, taking care of our physical health is often an essential first step on any road to self-improvement.

    No matter what the current state of our health is, it’s never too late to start changing our habits, even if it’s something small like stretching in the morning, taking daily walks outside, or starting an active hobby like Yoga, marathon running, or playing sports.

    A healthy body is a healthy mind. When we take better care of our bodies, we also feel more confident, motivated, and energized overall. That’s the beginning of bringing out your best self.


    Things to do:

    • Identify small ways to be more physically active. Often our days are filled with opportunities to be more active, we just need to take advantage of them. Try to cultivate an “everything counts” mindset when it comes to exercise, even if it just means taking a walk around the block, or stretching in the morning, or doing push-ups before lunch. Any physical activity is better than none at all – so seek out small and convenient ways to keep your body moving throughout the day. If you find yourself sitting for long periods of time, get up and do chores, take a walk around the office, or make a phone call while standing up. A sedentary lifestyle is one of the biggest risk factors when it comes to poor health, so finding any reason to stand up more is better than sitting.
    • Find exercise that “clicks” with you and your personality. Different things work for different people. Some people need to commit themselves to a gym membership to get themselves off the couch, while others prefer to work out in the comfort of their own homes. Your personality shapes what exercise you like, so it’s important you find activities that resonate and “click” with you, rather than trying to force yourself to do something you really don’t enjoy. All you need is that one hobby to take your fitness to the next level, whether it be finding an enjoyable sport (like Tennis, or Baseball, or Basketball), or even exercising through video games (such as Wii Fit or Dance Dance Revolution). Try to think of physical activities you enjoyed as a kid, that can often be a good place to rekindle motivation.
    • Keep a healthy and consistent sleep schedule. Sleep is one of the most important habits when it comes to your overall physical and mental health. Research shows that those who don’t get sufficient sleep (between 6-10 hours every night) often suffer worse health outcomes like a weaker immune system, higher risk of obesity, lower energy and stamina, and more stress and anxiety. If your sleep habits aren’t healthy or consistent, it will likely have a negative “ripple effect” on almost every other aspect of your day. When you’re tired and fatigued, you’re more likely to make mistakes at work or argue with your spouse. It’s important not only to get between 6-10 hours of sleep each night, but also to maintain a consistent schedule. If you don’t sleep much on the weekends, it’s difficult to “catch up” on those lost hours throughout the week. Try to go to bed and wake up around the same time each day if possible. Here are more important lessons behind a good night’s sleep, including recognizing that some people are natural “early birds” or “night owls,” and that’s something you need to recognize and work with.
    • Pay attention to your food and diet. There are many different diets out there to choose from – and people can have long debates about which one is better – but the most important thing is to not eat too much, especially junk food, fast food, soda, sweets, and lots of processed food. Use your commonsense. Experiment with different diet changes and see what works best for you. Different diets work better for different people – so there’s no “one size fits all” solution to what exactly you should eat or not eat. One simple diet change is to substitute all your soda/juice/sugary drinks with water instead. Drinking plenty of water is never a bad place to start – most people don’t recognize how dehydrated they can be throughout the day and how it effects them. If you’re trying to lose weight, one popular option you can consider is intermittent fasting where you allow yourself to eat for an 8 hour window each day and fast for the remaining 16 hours. You can also try the “One Meal A Day” approach, where you restrict yourself to just one big meal (with minimal snacking). In general, pay attention to how your body responds to the things you eat: What foods leave you tired and feeling like crap? What foods make you energized and feeling good?
    • Take care of personal hygiene and cleanliness. Proper hygiene is another important aspect of physical health. While it can seem like commonsense, basic habits like taking a shower, brushing your teeth, getting a haircut, trimming your nails, and washing your face are are all important things not to neglect. Not only does cleanliness prevent you from catching germs and getting sick, you also feel better about yourself when you present yourself in the best way possible (and smell good). Often we are surprised by how much better we feel after a fresh new haircut, or clean new clothes, or new cologne/perfume. When mental health is low, we sometimes neglect these basic habits out of laziness or apathy, which is why they are a crucial first step in self-improvement if we aren’t paying enough attention to them.
    • Minimize your bad habits. No one is 100% perfect and we all have a couple bad habits, whether it be eating too many sweets, or drinking alcohol, or staying up late, or smoking cigarettes. In general, it’s important to quit (or minimize) our unhealthy habits as much as possible. “Choose your crutches wisely.” Keep in mind the long-term consequences of your habits – while it may not feel like they are hurting you right now, their effects can often catch up to you in the future. When trying to quit any bad habit, identify your triggers and work from there to change to change your patterns. Often by creating more boundaries between you and your bad habits, you can overcome your urge to do them (until it’s no longer an automatic habit anymore). If you find that you have a serious problem with addiction or drug abuse, consider professional help (such as a therapist, psychologist, or counselor) – there are often local resources available in your area if you do a quick search.

    Please don’t underestimate the importance of keeping your body in the best shape possible. As Socrates famously said, “No man has the right to be an amateur in the matter of physical training. It is a shame for a man to grow old without seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable.”

    Physical health is about much more than just looking and feeling good about yourself – it’s about living a life of vitality and longevity. You can have everything else in your life figured out, but if you don’t maintain your health you won’t be around very long to use or enjoy it.

    2. MENTAL WELL-BEING

    mental

    If you don’t take care of your body then it will slowly deteriorate – and the same is true for your mind.

    Just because you don’t have to go to school anymore doesn’t mean you can’t keep learning new things, keeping your brain sharp, and challenging your intellect.

    Reading books. Learning about new topics. Having deep conversations. Attending lectures and workshops. Following the news. These are all commonsense ways to keep our minds active and continue to update our knowledge and belief system as we move through life.

    Learning is a lifelong endeavor. Balanced people are always seeking new things to dig into and learn more about like a new hobby, new game, or new skill such as painting, chess, learning a new language, or playing a musical instrument.

    In addition, research shows that continuing to challenge our brain is an important way to prevent cognitive decline as we get older, including lower the risk of dementia and memory loss.


    Things to do:

    • Read more books. Reading is one of the best ways to keep your mind sharp and learn new things. Nonfiction books about science, history, philosophy, or self help can grow your knowledge and broaden your perspective on life; and reading fiction has been shown to have many cognitive benefits such as boosting empathy, creative thinking, and expanding your vocabulary. If you haven’t read a book in awhile, try to make it a goal to read at least one book this year. You can start with a book you already own but never got a chance to read, or ask a friend for a book recommendation, or get a card from your local library and explore countless books for free. Find a topic or subject that interests you and start there!
    • Learn a new skill. Learning multiple skills is a hallmark of being a balanced and well-rounded person. It’s never too late in life to dive into something completely new, such as playing a musical instrument, learning a new language, writing poetry, painting, or playing chess. A jack of all trades mindset can make you stand-out from others in unique ways. Many people have a talent or passion for at least one thing, but when you start combining talents and cultivating multiple interests it shows your range and flexibility as a person. Don’t limit yourself. There’s no pressure to become a “professional” or “expert” in everything you do, just stay on a learning path, have fun while doing it, and enjoy seeing the growth as you go.
    • Watch documentaries. Documentaries are a fun and easy way to explore new topics and learn about interesting things you otherwise wouldn’t experience. Depending on what you like, there are many different subjects to choose from: history, sports, biographies, science, inspirational stories, or nature documentaries (which have also been shown to boost positive emotions like joy, gratitude, and awe). I’ve made a lengthy list of recommended documentaries which I try to keep updated as I discover new ones. Check it out and choose one that catches your eye!
    • Monitor your information diet. Our current world is overloaded with information, including a lot that is wrong, misleading, or straight up lies and propaganda. Now more than ever we need to pay close attention to the information we consume on a daily basis. Try to find trustworthy news and educational sites where you can easily verify what they are saying from other sources. Beware of going down esoteric “rabbit holes” where people only confirm their own biases and beliefs. Actively seek out information from multiple sides so you’re at least aware of different perspectives and counter-arguments. The information pyramid is a great guide on how you should prioritize certain sources over others. In general, a peer-reviewed scientific study should be given more weight than some random influencer on social media. Keep in mind it’s also possible to consume too much and become an information junkie, where you’re addicted to learning new things, but you never act on it or put it into practice.
    • Spend time in active reflection. Give yourself time to think and digest, even if it’s just for 10 minutes while sitting with your first cup of coffee in the morning. You don’t always need to be filling your brain with facts to be a smarter person, you also need to know how to step back and contemplate what you know. Active and engaged minds are always taking advantage of opportunities for everyday reflection when sitting on the bus, taking a shower, or walking the dog. Often your best ideas and insights come in moments when you’re not trying to solve a problem directly but just mulling it over in your mind. Schedule time for solitude every now and then and don’t be afraid to sit alone with your thoughts.
    • Learn how your mind works. One essential component to being a more intelligent thinker is knowing how your mind works. We naturally believe we understand ourselves best, but psychology and neuroscience can sometimes reveal counter-intuitive facts and tendencies. To start, our minds are very susceptible to cognitive biases and logical fallacies that can muddy our thinking and understanding of reality. One of the most common errors is black and white thinking, where we believe a situation needs to be either “A” or “B,” but a third perspective, “C,” is the more accurate view. Our minds like to over-simplify things when reality can often be more nuanced and complex. Show intellectual humility. Be open to being wrong and be open to changing your mind in the face of new evidence and experience.

    Take your education seriously. Maintain a healthy and active brain. Even if you were never a good student in school, that doesn’t mean you can’t improve your knowledge and intelligence, especially once you find subjects you are deeply passionate about. Benjamin Franklin once said, “An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.”

    3. EMOTIONAL WELL-BEING

    emotional

    In the “Mental” section we covered how to keep our brains active and be more intelligent thinkers, but there’s also a whole other side of our psychology that we need to pay attention to as well: our “Emotional” side.

    Emotions can often seem like something that we have limited power over, but being a more emotionally intelligent person means becoming more self-aware and learning how to better respond to our emotions in the moment.

    We can’t ignore our emotions or push them aside forever, they are a necessary facet of life and we must learn to navigate our emotional world effectively if we want to live the best life possible.

    Remember that emotions are a resource, not a crutch. Every emotion serves a function or purpose, and if we channel our emotions in a constructive direction we can make great things happen.

    One important lesson is that even negative emotions like sadness, anger, guilt, or fear are helpful to a better life if we approach them from the right perspective.


    Things to do:

    • Learn the basics of emotional intelligence. There are 4 fundamental pillars of emotional intelligence that we need to cultivate: 1) Self-awareness (recognizing our emotions when they happen), 2) Self-regulation (knowing how to respond to our emotions and channel them in a positive direction, 3) Empathy (being aware of other people’s emotions and internal states), and 4) Social Skills (knowing how to respond to other people’s emotions in a healthy and constructive way). Certain people may be strong at some of these and not for others. For example, someone may be really empathetic and caring, but not know how to regulate their own mood and emotions, leading to burnout and emotional fatigue. An emotionally intelligent person must work on all four of these pillars.
    • Improve body awareness. All emotions have a physical component to them. When you learn how to identify the physical sensations behind each emotion, you’ll be much more attuned to your feelings in the moment as you’re experiencing them. This helps you to be more aware of your feelings before acting on them, and to recognize how emotions often want to push or pull you in a certain direction (“do this” vs. “don’t do that”). Every feeling serves a different function depending on its emotional valence (“positive” vs. “negative”) and arousal level (“high energy” vs. “low energy”). With practice, this improved body awareness can also boost your intuition, making you a better reader of your “gut feelings” and what they are telling you.
    • Learn to channel negative emotions. Negative emotions can serve a positive function if you know how to respond to them in a constructive way. If you struggle with any specific negative emotion (sadness, fear, guilt, or anger), then create a plan for how you will respond to it the next time it arises. For example, “If I’m angry, then I’ll go exercise,” or “If I’m sad, then I’ll write in my journal.” Emotions are energy that can be channeled in multiple directions. Write a list of the many ways you can respond to any negative emotion. Remind yourself you have a choice, and you don’t have to keep following the same pattern between negative emotion → negative behavior. One popular technique is opposite action, where you intentionally do the opposite of what a feeling is telling you to do (to reverse the cycle of negativity).
    • Practice meditation and daily mindfulness. Meditation is a great avenue for better understanding and regulating your emotions. It teaches you how to step back and just observe your thoughts and feelings without needing to immediately react to them. This space between “feelings” and “actions” is crucial for being a more emotionally intelligent person; it’s the main principle behind discipline, willpower, and self-control. Never forget that just because you feel a certain way doesn’t mean you need to act on it. If you’re completely new to meditation, start with the 100 breaths meditation – a simple exercise where you just focus on your breathing. It’s also helpful to learn grounding techniques for when you feel overwhelmed, such as mindful stretching or a 5 senses meditation.
    • Embrace creative expression. It’s difficult to describe many emotions with only words so it’s important to embrace other ways of expressing yourself, such as through music, photography, dance, painting, drawing, acting, or film. Often when I meet people who don’t feel fully connected to their emotional self, they usually lack ways of expressing themselves through art and creativity. A creative outlet is often a prerequisite to better understanding and navigating your emotional world, even if you don’t typically think of yourself as a “creative person.”
    • Savor all of your positive experiences. Life is filled with many joys and pleasures throughout the day and we should try to savor them as much as possible. We have many positive emotions to choose from – joy, gratitude, peace, awe, excitement, laughter, and wonder – and there are a variety of activities that can lead to more positive emodiversity in our lives. Don’t just chase after the same positive experiences over and over again, seek new experiences, new hobbies, and new ways of enjoying life. Learn how to savor happiness as much as possible by being more present in the moment, creating positive memories, and reminiscing on good times.
    • Relax and manage daily stress. Last but not least, it’s necessary we cover stress management as an essential component to mental health and emotional intelligence. Stress is a normal part of everyday life, but if you don’t know how to manage it in a healthy way it can often have a negative influence on your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors by making you more sensitive, irritable, angry, and bothered (even by little things that don’t really matter). Recognize when to push yourself vs. when to step back and recharge. In the complete guide on daily stress, you’ll find a great framework for reframing your “fight, flight, or freeze” response by viewing stress as a signal to pay attention to and guide you throughout the day. Don’t underestimate the importance of your comfort zone and use it as a place to recharge after a challenging or overwhelming day.

    Emotions can “make us” or “break us” depending on how emotionally intelligent we are. They are a fundamental part of life, but we often have more power over them than we realize. Learn how to channel your emotions in a healthy and constructive way – become a master of them, not a slave to them.

    4. SOCIAL WELL-BEING

    social

    Healthy and positive relationships are an essential ingredient to happiness and well-being.

    No matter who you are, you crave some type of social connection; even the most introverted person on the planet will have a tough time finding happiness all by themselves.

    There used to be a time when I believed “I don’t need people to be happy, all I need is myself.” But over the years I’ve learned more and more that having social support and a sense of belonging is a basic human need that can’t be avoided.

    How strong is your current social circle? Here’s advice to get you started.


    Things to do:

    • Stay connected with friends and family. You should try your best to stay in touch with people who you already have a strong relationship with, especially family and old friends. There’s a simple power in checking in on people and preserving social connections you’ve already established. It doesn’t take much time or effort to show you’re thinking about someone: a simple text, email, or phone call is all you need to let people know you still care and value your relationship with them. You’d be surprised by how much other people appreciate you reaching out to them, even if you haven’t spoken to them in a really long time.
    • Embrace small social interactions. Every time you leave your home, there is opportunity for social interaction. To build your social muscles, embrace the power of 10 second relationships, such as saying “Hi,” to a neighbor or coworker, small talk with a cashier or cab driver, or sparking up a quick conversation while waiting for the train or bus. Research shows even super tiny social interactions can boost positive emotions and feelings of social connectedness. This can also be a great exercise for people who are very introverted (or have a lot of social anxiety) and want to start being a more social person. Make a plan to have a pleasant interaction with at least one new person every day.
    • Learn how to have endless conversations. One big concern for people when it comes to meeting new people is, “What do I say? What if I run out of things to talk about?” One popular technique known as conversation threading provides an excellent framework so that you never run out of topics to talk about. The basic idea is that every sentence contains multiple “threads” we can go down, and often the art of good conversation is being able to 1) Listen to what people say, and 2) Choose a thread to talk more about. Rinse and repeat and a conversation can go on forever. Also consider improvisation exercises so that you can be a faster and more creative thinker in the moment.
    • Improve communication and conflict resolution. It’s a cliché, but communication is everything in relationships. If you don’t know how to express your thoughts and feelings in an honest and constructive way, you’ll have trouble building genuine and healthy connections with others at home, work, or wherever you need to cooperate and work together with people. In romantic relationships, it’s important to know how to communicate your feelings without manipulating or being dramatic. In family and work environments, it’s important to know how to defuse heated arguments before they spiral out of control. The truth is people can be difficult and you’re not going to like everyone’s company. That’s natural. Conflicts have the potential to arise in any social situation, because people have different beliefs, values, and personalities that may be incompatible with each other. What’s most important is to teach yourself the best methods for conflict resolution so you can better navigate the complexities of your social world.
    • Find opportunities to meet new people. Most people make friends through work or school. Once we get older, it can become more difficult to find new connections or become a part of new social circles. Recent research shows that most adults claim to have “less than 5 close friends.” If you’re looking to expand your circle, there are many opportunities available to you. Depending on your likes, hobbies, and interests, consider going out more to music shows, bars, coffee shops, workshops, church/religious services, bowling leagues, adult education classes, sports events, or book clubs. Seek out local groups in your area or volunteer somewhere. You can also take advantage of websites like Meet Up to connect with like-minded people who live close-by. All it takes is one new friend to introduce you to an entirely new social circle. Be patient and don’t worry if you don’t initially hit it off with the first couple people you meet. Finding the right relationships that fit into our lives can take time.
    • Use social media and the internet to connect. The internet can be a great place to connect with like-minded people who we’d never meet in the real world. Online communities on social media, message boards, or video games can often provide a valuable source of social interaction, especially for people who don’t have many “real life” friends. The internet can be particularly helpful for connecting with others who have rare or eccentric hobbies, such as fans of a specific author, athlete, music genre, or comic book franchise. Unfortunately, many online communities can also become negative, competitive, and toxic (see the online disinhibition effect), so it’s necessary you build a positive digital environment that works for you. That doesn’t mean hiding in your own “echo chamber,” but it does mean cultivating a feed and followers who ultimately add value to your life and don’t subtract it. First focus on topics you’re naturally interested in such as science, technology, sports, or movies. Try not to be a passive consumer of information, actively enter conversations by asking questions or sharing knowledge with others. Often times we can build meaningful connections with people online that are just as important as those we find in the real world. However, while online relationships can have many benefits, we shouldn’t see them as a substitute for real world “face to face” interactions.

    Always remember that quality of relationships > quantity of relationships.

    You don’t need to be super popular or the life of the party to have a healthy social life. All you need is a couple really close friends who support you, trust you, and enjoy your presence. That’s everything you need to be socially satisfied.

    Healthy relationships are a fundamental aspect of happiness and well-being for everyone. Our need to belong to a “tribe” or group is hardwired into our brain, biology, and evolution. Like every other aspect of a balanced person, it can’t be ignored.

    Are your daily social needs being fulfilled?

    5. WORK / FINANCIAL WELL-BEING

    work

    Another fundamental aspect of a balanced person is work, money, and material concerns.

    At the most basic level, we depend on food, clothing, shelter, healthcare, and other necessities so we can live a healthy and dignified life.

    People that struggle to make a living can often hurt in many other areas: physical health (can’t afford good foods, healthcare, or medicine), relationships (can’t support family, no money for dating), as well as our mental and emotional well-being (stress, anxiety, and low self-esteem).

    Unless you win the lottery or have someone else to provide for you, finding a steady job or career is often one of the most focused on areas in life. From childhood up until we finish high school or college, we are constantly asked, “What do you want to do for a living?”

    A few people find jobs they love, many find jobs they like, and most find jobs they can at least tolerate. Balancing psychological needs with financial needs can be a difficult task depending on your current situation.

    While we don’t always get a choice in what we do for a living, there are important ways to give ourselves more power over our work life and financial life. Here are important guidelines to keep in mind.


    Things to do:

    • Focus on your strengths. Everyone has a place in this world where they add value. Before you decide what type of work you’d like to do for a living, it’s important to know what your natural strengths, skills, and talents are. If you’re friendly and good with people, you may excel at managing, customer service, or human resources type jobs. If you’re more introverted and creative, you may want to focus on writing, graphic design, computer programming, or freelance work. What type of activities are you typically good at (or at least above average)? What were your best subjects in school? What do you enjoy doing and why? Complete the strengths worksheet to discover more about your natural skillset. Ultimately, knowing your strengths will influence what types of jobs or career choices will suit you best – including where you contribute the most value.
    • Value education and experience. No matter what your job is, there are always new ways to learn and improve. The best workers in life are those who are always growing and mastering their craft. College is still an important part of education, but what’s even more important is to stay self-motivated and continue learning after school. Many people I know have landed successful jobs that had virtually nothing to do with what they studied in college. In several cases, they were people who taught themselves coding/programming, built a portfolio to show their work to potential employers, and climbed their way up the company ladder from there. All self-taught. You can also consider going to trade schools, workshops, mentorships, internships, and other forms of gaining knowledge and experience that are outside of the traditional college model. Any work experience is better than none at all – you just need to start somewhere and begin building yourself up.
    • Make the most of your job. While it’s rare for any of us to get our “dream job,” we can always make the most of our work life by being a good employee and doing our best. Use nudges to keep yourself motivated and productive throughout the day, learn mental strategies for getting things done that you normally “don’t like” doing, and make friends at work with bosses, coworkers, clients, or customers, because those are the people you’re going to be spending a lot of time with and it’s crucial you have healthy and functioning relationships with them. No matter what your job is try to see the underlying purpose or meaning behind it. What value does it add to the world? Are you proud of the work you do?
    • Live within your means. Regardless of how much money you make, one of the most commonsense rules for financial well-being is living within your means. This includes keeping a budget that you can maintain (for food, rent/mortgage, bills, gas, clothes, and leisure expenses), and not buying too much stuff you can’t immediately afford. Debt can be common at some point in our lives (due to student loans, credit card debt, medical emergencies, etc.), but try to be mindful to not put yourself in a hole that you can’t climb out of. Avoid luxury expenses that put you at financial risk. We sometimes over-extend ourselves due to social comparison and a “keeping up with the Joneses” mentality. We think if our friend or neighbor gets a brand new car or goes on an expensive trip, then we need to “one-up” them with a similar purchase. Many times people fall into massive debt because they are trying to chase status, fame, luxury, or exorbitant pleasures. In general, keep track of all your monthly expenses and find ways to cut back on spending that isn’t necessary. Learn about spending biases that can lead to overconsumption (like the allure of “FREE!,” the “Relativity Trap,” and “One Click” purchases). Big corporations are masters of psychology and persuasion. If we aren’t vigilant about our spending habits (especially if you enjoy retail therapy), then we’ll often fall for tricks that cause us to spend more money than we should.
    • Create a healthy relationship with material things. This article is about being a balanced person. Work and money are very important aspects of life, but materialistic beliefs can also backfire to hurt us. No one lays down on their deathbed wishing they spent more time in the office. Work-a-holics can end up focusing so much on their career that they neglect giving enough attention to their family, health, and well-being. Never forget that there is a lot more to a good life than just money and material things, despite what you may see glamorized in movies, TV shows, or commercials. Psychology research shows that after a certain point, increased wealth and income has very little effect on our overall happiness and life satisfaction. Being rich sounds awesome, but it won’t necessarily make you any happier than if you earned less with a stable and secure life. Take the materialism quiz to see if you have a healthy relationship with money and stuff.

    Remember, money is important but it isn’t everything.

    Financial well-being will often look radically different depending on the person. Certain people may be content with modest and minimal living, while others crave more luxury, adventure, and pleasure. Whichever lifestyle you choose, it’s necessary that money finds the proper role in your life without being completely consumed by it.

    One succinct way to define true financial well-being is “not needing to think about money all the time.”

    6. MEANINGFUL / SPIRITUAL WELL-BEING

    spiritual

    The meaningful or spiritual aspects of life can often be overlooked.

    We may occasionally ask ourselves big questions like, “Who am I?” “Why am I here?” or “What’s my purpose?” but we rarely translate these questions into our daily lives through action.

    For many people, religion is their main source of spirituality and meaning. Attending church, being part of a local community, prayer, and volunteering or giving to charities are common ways people boost meaning in their daily lives. Religion has been shown to improve happiness and well-being by creating a strong sense of purpose and community.

    However, we don’t need religion to have a meaningful life. There are many other sources of meaning, including art, culture, philosophy, literature, music, relationships, activism, introspection, and creativity.

    Where do you get your meaning in life?


    Things to do:

    • Learn the pillars of a meaningful life. One excellent guide on how to live a meaningful life outlines five different pillars to focus on, including 1) A sense of belonging (having healthy relationships with those around you), 2) A sense of purpose (feeling that you contribute to a larger whole), 3) Storytelling (the life story we tell about ourselves, as well as stories and myths about the world we live in), 4) Transcendence (experiencing “awe” and “inspiration” in the presence of great things), 5) Growth (having a sense that you are evolving and moving forward as a person). All five pillars contribute to a rich and meaningful existence.
    • Spend more time in nature. Nature reminds us that we are part of something larger than ourselves, a whole process known as “life.” Nature is a fantastic source of meaning because it continuously inspires positive emotions like joy, amazement, gratitude, and awe. The best part is that nature is all around us – we don’t need to plan a weekend camping trip to experience it – instead just pay attention to everyday nature that is all around you: trees on the drive to work, birdwatching in your backyard, or spending time in your garden over the summer. Having pets to care for is another easy and wonderful source of nature and connection, even if it’s just a small fish tank to maintain. Nature also includes enjoying the beauty of a nice view such as sunrises, sunsets, mountaintops, storm watching, and star-gazing.
    • Take a complete picture perspective. Finding meaning requires being able to look at things from a big picture perspective. What influence do your actions have in the long-term? What type of impact will you leave on the world after you die? When you keep the complete picture in mind, you recognize that even super small actions can add up and have big results in the future. Your life doesn’t begin at birth nor end at death, you are part of an intergenerational chain of cause-and-effect that has stretched thousands of years. That’s a powerful thought if you can see the true significance behind it.
    • Embrace art, music, and culture. Artists are the creators of new meanings, especially famous painters, musicians, filmmakers, photographers, authors, playwrights, and dancers. Pursuing a creative hobby of your own is one fantastic way to infuse new meaning into your life. You can also embrace art and culture more by going to museums, art galleries, music concerts, and theaters. A lot of beautiful art is archived in online art and cultural exhibits, so you can discover a lot of new inspiration by just sitting in the comfort of your own home. Artists of all forms teach us how universal the human condition is. It’s a huge inspirational boost when you realize a book written over a hundred years ago resonates exactly with how you feel today. One of my strongest memories is attending a music concert of my favorite band with thousands of others listening and singing along. Creativity is one of humanity’s greatest gifts and there’s a lot of wisdom, beauty, and feelings of universal connection it can offer us.
    • Signs, symbols, and synchronicity. A meaningful life can be more about feeling inspiration and empowerment rather than thinking only logically and factually about the world. Embrace things you can’t always explain. If you feel like you’re getting a “sign” from the universe, accept it. Our minds often think unconsciously through the power of symbols, especially through reoccurring dreams or nightmares that may be trying to tell you something important. Meaning can be created anywhere if you have the right perspective. Many of my favorite moments in life are when I experience synchronicity, which is finding a connection between two things that seem completely unrelated at first. For example, if I start reading a book and then someone brings up the same book randomly the next day, I try to see that as a sign that I’m on the right path. It may or may not be true, but it is a simple and easy way to add more meaning to the little things in life.
    • Have faith that life is good. Faith may not have any role in science, but it does play an important role in good living. At the end of the day, one of the most important beliefs we can have is that “life is good” and things will generally work out in the end. One of my personal favorite quotes is, “Pray to God, but row to shore.” It shows us to have hope and faith in life, but still take action and try our best in the moment. Both faith and action are necessary ingredients to a happy and fulfilling life. A belief in God or a higher power can make this whole process easier. However, even if you can’t bring yourself to accept “metaphysical” or “supernatural” ideas, at least try to sense the oneness and interconnectedness of all things. These ideas are an endless source of power, strength, and resilience, even in the face of incredible hardships and tribulations.

    A “meaningful life” can be one of the most difficult areas of life to improve, especially while living in a world that is filled with nihilism, hedonism, and materialism.

    However, once you build a strong spiritual core you can withstand almost any difficulty or hardship. It can empower you to a whole new level that non-spiritual people don’t usually have access to.

    CONCLUSION

    To sum things up we must invest time and energy in all six of these aspects if we want to live a happy and balanced life.

    Once again, these six aspects of a balanced life include: 1) Physical, 2) Mental, 3) Emotional, 4) Social, 5) Work/Financial, and 6) Meaningful/Spiritual.

    Which area are you the strongest in? Which area are you the weakest in?

    Keep this framework in mind as you embark on a lifetime of self-improvement. Try the Daily Routine (PDF) exercise and use this resource as a guideline.


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    Steven Handel

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  • Daily Routine Worksheet (PDF)

    Daily Routine Worksheet (PDF)

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    We are what we repeatedly do. Complete the “Daily Routine” worksheet to get a clear idea of what an average day looks like for you. Is there room for small changes?


    Download:

    Daily Routine Worksheet (PDF)

    Check out more self-improvement worksheets here!

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    Steven Handel

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  • 4 Japanese Concepts That Will Improve Your Well-Being

    4 Japanese Concepts That Will Improve Your Well-Being

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    Embark on a journey to well-being with these four profound Japanese concepts: Ikigai for purpose, Moai for community, Hara Hachi Bu for mindful eating, and Kintsugi for resilience. Discover insights to a healthier and happier life in the modern world by embracing the ancient wisdom of Japanese culture.


    Culture is a powerful force that influences the type of person we become. In the pursuit of well-being, different cultures can often teach us different lessons on what it means to live a good life.

    First, what is culture? The American anthropologist Edward T. Hall created the “Cultural Iceberg” framework to help us analyze the many factors that determine what a culture is. The theory illustrates that only 10% of culture is what we see (language, diet, music, fashion), while 90% of culture is hidden from us (beliefs, values, norms, and expectations).

    Here’s what the “Cultural Iceberg” looks like:

    cultural iceberg

    Generally we see the culture we grew up in as the default mode of being. This includes how people dress, what people eat, and what music they listen to, but also deeper aspects of life such as beliefs, values, morality, and how people approach life from a broader perspective.

    Culture, tradition, and social norms shape our map of reality, the choices we make, and how we navigate our world. If you’re raised in a society that only values materialistic goals like money, fame, or popularity, you’re naturally going to live a life in accordance with those values, especially if they go unquestioned.

    When we explore new cultures through traveling, reading, or meeting new people, we learn that there are many different ways we can approach life and the way we were raised isn’t necessarily the only way to live.

    One simplified but general way we can categorize different types of culture is Western vs. Eastern ways of thinking. Western cultures tend to be more individualistic, rational, and materialistic, while Eastern cultures tend to be more collectivist, holistic, and spiritual.

    Keep in mind, these are broad categorizations. Every country and culture is different. This also isn’t a judgment of “right” or “wrong” ways of thinking, but rather observing different personality types on a cultural scale.

    My experience from a Western perspective is that learning about various aspects of Eastern culture and philosophy (such as Buddhism, Taoism, or Confucianism) gave me a taste for different ways to look at the world and different perspectives on life that I otherwise wouldn’t have been exposed to.

    One popular country to look at is Japan which has a rich history, deep cultural roots, and long-held traditions that have been passed down over multiple generations. In this article, we’re going to cover four powerful Japanese concepts that provide universal lessons on how to live a healthier and happier life. Each concept reveals core values and beliefs that shape the way many Japanese people live.

    These powerful ideas include: Ikigai (“a reason for being”), Moai (“meeting for a common purpose”), Hara Hachi Bu (“belly 80% full”), and Kintsugi (“golden repair”). Now let’s dive deeper into each one!

    Ikigai

    a reason for being

    The Japanese concept of “Ikigai” is about finding a purpose in life. It directly translates to “a reason for being,” and it’s often described as the intersection between what you love, what you are good at, and what the world needs.

    Ikigai is a combination between intrinsic motivation (an activity you enjoy doing) and extrinsic rewards (an activity that creates value in the world and improves people’s lives). Psychology research has shown that ikigai is associated with elevated feelings of dedication, accomplishment, meaning, and fulfillment.

    This is in contrast to a lot of other cultures that just see work as a means to a paycheck or higher income, rather than reframing work as something that serves a higher purpose, both to yourself and society as a whole.

    Ikigai has been shown to benefit both physical and mental health. It can reduce stress and anxiety, which contributes to longer lives and less risk of cardiovascular disease and other ailments. In addition, ikigai is associated with greater resilience in the face of negative events. One interesting study found that ikigai helped people better cope with stress after an earthquake or natural disaster.

    Here’s a visual of what constitutes ikigai:

    ikigai

    If you can find activities that meet all of these requirements, then you’ve found your ikigai.

    Discovering your ikigai can take time and patience though. It involves careful introspection, understanding your strengths, passions, and talents, and finding ways to use those powers to fulfill the needs of the world.

    Once you find your ikigai, it’s important to align your daily activities with it if you want to build a more purposeful and meaningful life.

    Moai

    meeting for a common purpose

    Human connection is vital for our well-being, and the Japanese practice of “Moai” emphasizes the strength of communal bonds.

    Moai refers to a group of people who come together for a shared purpose, providing emotional, social, and even financial support. Often a moai includes family, friends, and neighbors within a local community. They will see each other frequently, talk and catch up on each other’s lives, and organize group activities such as game nights, fitness groups, music performances, or dance parties.

    This tight sense of community provides an important sense of belonging. It also comes with physical benefits like healthier lifestyles, exercise, social connection, and financial support if someone finds themselves in a tough situation.

    In today’s world, many people are suffering from loneliness and depression. One major cause of this is hyper individualism and atomistic lifestyles that no longer promote community values. Many Americans report having zero close friends and only 38% say they have “5 friends or more.” This is in stark contrast to the moai way of life which can often include 10-12+ lifelong friends.

    While there’s plenty of research showing the physical and mental benefits of social support, one of the most common examples of moai can be found in Okinawa, Japan, which has been identified as a “blue zone.”

    Blue zones are places around the world that are associated with better health and longevity. Often there are high numbers of centenarians in them (or people who have lived over 100). The recent Netflix documentary Live to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zones by public health researcher Dan Buettner has a great episode dedicated to Okinawa that shows how the moais work there.

    Many health professionals and experts are now claiming we are in a “loneliness epidemic,” with over 1 in 4 adults saying they feel socially isolated. This can have serious health consequences such as increased risk of anxiety, depression, heart disease, stroke, dementia, and overall shorter lifespans. The negative effects of loneliness have been compared to the effects of daily cigarette smoking.

    As communities continue to decline and feelings of social alienation increase, the moai mentality is needed now more than ever.

    Hara Hachi Bu

    belly 80% full

    In a culture often associated with healthy living and longevity, the Japanese concept of “Hara Hachi Bu” teaches us the art of mindful eating. Translated as “belly 80% full,” this practice encourages moderation in our meals.

    Obesity is a growing problem around the entire world. Recent reports show that 39% of the global population in 2023 is obese or overweight, and this is a sharp increase from 23.9% in 2008. If this trend continues, researchers predict that over half of the global population will have obesity by 2035.

    One factor in this rise in obesity is having abundant access to ultraprocessed foods, including the convenience of fast food and junk food. The modern diet is filled with supernormal foods that hijack our natural instincts for sugar, salts, and rich flavor, which is why many people end up over-eating during meals or late night binging.

    The lesson of Hara Hachi Bu is more relevant now than ever. By reminding ourselves to only eat until we are 80% full, we encourage slower and more mindful eating. This lets you enjoy your meal more by paying attention to each bite and savoring it, rather than quickly moving from one bite to the next without fully appreciating it.

    Many people eat unconsciously. Often it’s eating while watching TV/movies, checking their phones, scrolling social media, or socializing with friends. Their main focus is on one thing, while eating is just something happening in the background. These distractions can lead you to eat more than you otherwise would.

    Slowing down your eating will lead to less consumption, better digestion, and improved body awareness of how you respond to certain foods, the best times of the day to eat (or not), and what it feels like to be “50% full” → “80% full” → “100% full” → “110% full.”

    Adopting Hara Hachi Bu not only contributes to physical well-being by maintaining a healthy weight but also cultivates a mindful approach to eating that can lead to a stronger connection with the food we consume.

    Kintsugi

    golden repair

    Derived from the Japanese words “kin” (golden) and “tsugi” (repair), Kintsugi is the art of repairing broken pottery with lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum.

    Here’s what it looks like:

    kintsugi

    Instead of hiding the cracks and flaws, the practice of kintsugi embraces the broken parts by highlighting them in gold. It celebrates its imperfections, while at the same time making them stronger and more beautiful.

    Many find inspiration when applying this concept to their personal lives. It helps them to accept the challenges and obstacles they’ve had to face over the years – the physical, mental, and emotional battle scars – and see them as jumping points for growth and improvement.

    No one’s life is perfect. We all suffer from weaknesses, flaws, insecurities, and vulnerabilities. Our instinct is to hide them, ignore them, or deny them, but the paradox is that when we accept them is when we actually become stronger.

    Kintsugi promotes resilience, growth, and grit. It shows that no matter how many times you get broken, you can always repair yourself in gold.

    Conclusion

    Each of these Japanese concepts – Ikigai, Moai, Hara Hachi Bu, and Kintsugi – offers a kernel of wisdom that we can all apply to our daily lives.

    While these ideas are ancient, they are more relevant to modern living than ever before. Ikigai teaches us meaning and purpose, Moai teaches us social connection, Hara Hachi Bu teaches us mindful eating, and Kintsugi teaches us growth and resilience.

    Which concept do you need to embrace the most right now?


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    Steven Handel

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  • To foster young talent, employers need to share their social capital

    To foster young talent, employers need to share their social capital

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    This article originally appeared on the Christensen Institute’s blog and is reposted here with permission.

    Key points:

    In July 2023, our team published “People-powered pathways: Lessons in how to build students’ social capital through career-connected learning.” In the report, we describe successes and challenges in bringing social capital–building strategies to a variety of educational settings. Our observations draw from an 18-month pilot during which we leveraged our social capital playbook to provide direct support to a group of three intermediary organizations—Education Strategy Group, Generation Schools Network, and Hawai‘i P-20—collectively supporting 20 sites in the K–12 career pathways space. In the course of the pilot, we sought to understand how schools and nonprofits can make social capital-building an explicit, effective, and equitable component of existing career-connected learning models. 

    In career-connected learning, employee volunteers like internship supervisors or guest speakers typically see their role as providing students job-specific knowledge and skills. However, these individuals have an equally important role to play in students’ networks: fostering students’ well-being and economic mobility by creating lasting relationships that involve sharing resources, connections, and opportunities. 

    To make this kind of role a reality, employers need to understand the goals of social capital-building, what will be expected of them, and how it can benefit both parties. As one nonprofit leader explained, helping employers take on that role may require upfront reflection, encouraging them to consider pre-conceived notions they may have about young people:

     “[If] everybody is committed to working on interrogating all of the thoughts that we as adults have about young people, good and bad, then the effect ends up being social capital. Because you’ve actually taken down the barrier or the silo that says ‘I am this and you are that. I’m here to provide a service and you’re here to get one.’”

    For organizations and schools brokering connections to employers, infusing social capital into the purpose behind those connections influenced how they recruited, vetted, and prepared employer partners who would be interacting with students. One nonprofit leader stated, 

    “We vet our employers that we work with and we have an orientation. They start perhaps from different places and they might not know how [to work with us]. They might have an idea about what an eighth grader is or is not, what ‘risk factors’ youth of color may come with or what their story may be. Part of what is important to us is working with worksite partners so they can see a whole person, an eighth grader who is a complete asset now, and the net value later of working with young people.”

    Acknowledging and tackling the “burden of investment”

    During our pilot, surveys of site staff revealed that 40% found it somewhat difficult to educate employers about how they can help build students’ social capital. Although nonprofits who were heavily involved in internship or apprenticeships often had the time and expertise to design and conduct orientations for employers, other sites with less capacity were wary of asking too much of their employer partners. In these circumstances, additional training for employers specifically focused on building relationships with students was rarely an option.

    While emphasizing return-on-investment (ROI) can help some employers see the long-term benefits of this type of work, one intermediary partner pointed out that for some employers it’s also about avoiding the short-term burden it places on their employees. In addition to ROI, the partner explained, 

    “There’s also BOI, which is ‘burden of investment.’ Making it easier for [employers] to see that the burden of their investment in this is not that burdensome, and that the experience is enjoyable. [Employees] enjoy the experience of the personal relationship with the kids, and that reduces the burden of investment as well. And it grows our partners’ social capital.” 

    When working with employers concerned about upfront burden on their employees, one option is to provide a menu that describes different options for getting involved based on employee volunteers’ capacity and interests. This arrangement not only allows employers to understand what is expected of them and their employees, but also allows them to choose the types of experiences that they feel will be enjoyable and meaningful for them. With this mutual understanding, work-based learning can take shape much more easily.  

    Example in action: 

    Apprentice Learning is a Boston-based nonprofit organization that provides real-world work experiences for eighth graders. Given that Apprentice Learning’s students were already immersed in work settings as part of their apprenticeships, the Boston site planning team felt that these experiences were a natural fit for building social capital.

    While most career-readiness programs ask, “How prepared are young people to build relationships with adults?,” Apprentice Learning equally emphasizes the other side of the equation by asking “How prepared are adults to build relationships with young people?” 

    During the pilot, Apprentice Learning communicated its vision to employer partners in multiple ways. First, it held an orientation for employers in which Apprentice Learning staff used an asset-based frame to gently challenge employers’ beliefs about what young people can do and what it means to have relationships with them. The goal was to help employers realize that they are building meaningful relationships with human beings who are still learning, yet capable of tremendous success. 

    Apprentice Learning also communicated with employers via weekly emails. These emails contained guidance for apprenticeship supervisors about how they could best support students, including conversation starters such as “consider talking with your apprentice about your first job,” or “consider sharing about a time when you encountered a struggle in your job and how you navigated it.” As one program leader stated, 

    “Because of the questions that we put in our weekly letter to our worksite partners, there are more opportunities for them to have conversations about their interests and their trajectory. One of the things that’s resulted in is that at least three, maybe four of our kids have been offered possible summer opportunities. And it is because the worksite partner and the young person took the time to get to know some things about each other a little bit beyond the ‘how to work’ part.”

    Finally, Apprentice Learning staff visited each student’s worksite and engaged in one-on-one conversations with their worksite supervisors. These conversations further reinforced the foundation that Apprentice Learning built during the orientations and maintained with the weekly emails. Describing a recent visit to a worksite where two students were apprenticing, a program leader recalled how the conversations they had with employers about building social capital influenced supervisors’ behaviors. When she walked into the worksite, the students’ supervisor immediately offered to provide references for the students if they needed them. “We didn’t have to ask the guy—it was offered. And [the students] understood that their [supervisors] are a resource that they didn’t necessarily know that they had.”  

    In conclusion, it’s time that employers’ roles in career-connected learning go beyond imparting skills. As decades of research show, it’s skills plus connections that truly move students up the economic distribution ladder. 

    However, accomplishing this goal requires a shift in perspective and intentionality. What we need are systems that incentivize sharing of social capital. Schools and nonprofits like Apprentice Learning are well positioned to start the conversation with their employer partners. But employers participating in these efforts have a responsibility to allocate resources and create policies that foster more student-centered experiences. While it requires upfront investment, focusing on young people now provides a solid foundation for the society of the future

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    Robert Markle, PhD, Research Manager, Christensen Institute

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  • Automattic CEO Matt Mullenweg details Tumblr’s future after re-org | TechCrunch

    Automattic CEO Matt Mullenweg details Tumblr’s future after re-org | TechCrunch

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    This week, WordPress.com owner Matt Mullenweg confirmed his company would be shifting the majority of Tumblr’s workforce to other areas at parent company Automattic in light of the social blogging site’s continued financial woes. After acknowledging and explaining the meaning behind a leaked internal memo detailing the staff changes, Mullenweg then went on to field a number of questions about Tumblr’s future in an AMA (Ask Me Anything) session on his own Tumblr blog. Here, the exec responded to questions about Tumblr’s plans for existing products, like Tumblr Live, its monetization efforts, policies, and its planned integration with the decentralized social networking protocol ActivityPub, which Mullenweg had earlier said was in the works.

    TechCrunch’s Amanda Silberling broke the news of the Tumblr re-org, noting that 139 of the site’s workers would be moved to other projects at Automattic, the parent company to not only Tumblr and WordPress.com, but also WP VIP, Day One, Pocket Casts, WooCommerce, and other apps and services, including the recently acquired all-in-one texting app Texts.com.

    But Mullenweg’s AMA offered a lot more insight into how the company plans to run Tumblr, the blogging site it picked up from Verizon for $3 million in 2019 Though the acquisition price was a steal — especially given Yahoo earlier bought it for over a billion dollars — the business itself is losing $30 million per year. That necessitated the re-org.

    Below are some of the key takeaways from Mullenweg’s exchange with Tumblr users during the AMA, which shed light on what’s ahead for Tumblr in 2024 and beyond.

    When are the staff changes happening?

    Mullenweg said the changes to the Tumblr team will happen on December 31, 2023. He said the team will be presented with other projects at Automattic and will be able to rank their top three picks, as staff is reassigned. The team impacted is known as “Bumblr” which is the internal name for the product side of Tumblr.

    The move was not a surprise, he added — the Tumblr team has known for over a year that if it couldn’t get the revenue up, some of them would have to work on other things that make the company money.

    Tumblr staff being reassigned will be able to choose from the following: WP.com, WooCommerce, Jetpack, Day One, Pocket Casts, WP VIP, .Org, Applied AI, Texts, self-serve advertising (Blaze), Newspack, Pressable, and Gravatar.

    Why were some people laid off without being reassigned?

    Mullenweg admitted that the company, like many, does engage in performance management reviews and sometimes that means people are let go.

    “Automattic is continuously hiring and firing people to try to create the best open web tech team in the world,” he wrote.

    In other words, some people were laid off but it wasn’t because of Tumblr’s financial woes.

    Will Tumblr’s localization plans be impacted by the staff changes?

    Mullenweg confirmed that translation and localization will continue, and are not impacted by the changes.

    What does success at Tumblr look like?

    The WordPress exec said a successful version of Tumblr would see it becoming a place that “everyone goes to hang out online” with a “billion micro-communities.” He didn’t share specifics, like how much money that would require, though.

    What are Tumblr’s monetization plans?

    Tumblr today offers a subscription which is currently the best way to support the site, Mullenweg said. Users can choose from either the Tumblr Supporter badge for $29.99/year or $2.99/month or subscribe to a similarly-priced ad-free offering. Subscribing on the web instead of in-app allows Tumblr to keep more of the revenue as it doesn’t have to pay app store commissions.

    However, out of Tumblr’s 11.5 million monthly active users, only 27,000 are subscribers (0.2%). If 10-20% subscribed, Tumblr would be in good shape, Mullenweg noted. Then, “we could run the site forever,” he shared.

    What’s more, he said the Tumblr Supporter badge hasn’t been very successful on its own, with only 2,300 total subscribers to that product.

    In response to another question, Mullenweg suggested that Tumblr users could gift subscriptions, ask people to subscribe, and be supportive of advertisers and brands that are supporting Tumblr.

    He mentioned, too, some changes ahead for TumblrMart. While the virtual goods and subscriptions will continue, Tumblr will likely have to “scale back the physical stuff” as it was only profitable on a small scale. (And the person running it doesn’t want to anymore, Mullenweg noted.)

    In other responses, Mullenweg appeared to be considering how to support Tumblr via ads in different ways.

    What’s the future of advertising on Tumblr?

    Mullenweg said the vast majority of ad revenue on Tumblr is from programmatic ads, due to a number of factors, including the site’s declining traffic and various attacks on brands running ads from Tumblr’s user base. He added that self-serve ads with Blaze have “gone well” and that tooling can be re-used across Tumblr, WooCommerce, and WordPress.

    Still, he noted that Blaze and Ad-free’s adoption is so small they can’t support Tumblr’s some 1,000 servers or its employee salaries.

    The exec added he’s thinking about new ways to allow advertisers to more easily duplicate campaigns they’re running elsewhere with similar formats, which would raise the quality of Tumblr’s ads. This could be targeted at brands looking to move some percentage of their ad budget away from Twitter/X, for example.

    Will Tumblr support moving blogs to WordPress.com?

    Here, the exec was a bit vague on future plans, but said Tumblr today has a full export option available and WordPress can import content. However, actually moving Tumblr blogs to WordPress.com would be a “tricky migration,” Mullenweg said, but hinted that new technology like AI will make it easier.

    How will Tumblr’s product change in 2024?

    Mullenweg admitted the team had been spread too thin and spent too much effort on things that didn’t work. In 2024, the company will “hone in on” the parts of Tumblr people love and put an end to the things that don’t work.

    He suggested that Tumblr will continue to innovate, as well, saying:

    “We’ll continue [to] stay on the bleeding edge of what technology allows and enables, and hopefully provide pressure for other social networks to step up their game, as they have with dozens of features Tumblr invented and others followed.”

    Areas of interest he cited were images, which he said were easy, but noted streaming high-res video would need to be paid (but not expensive.) He also noted that Automattic has some video technology it could lean on with VideoPress.

    In terms of missed opportunities, Mullenweg lamented the demise of the Post+ creator subscription, which would have directed all funds to creators without Tumblr taking a cut. But misinformation about fan fic writers being sued by copyright holders led to a coordinated attack campaign that led to every launch creator canceling the program, he said.

    “It was sad, because this was a feature users and creators said they wanted, and we prioritized making users money over projects that would make us money,” Mullenweg wrote.

    Is Tumblr Live shutting down?

    The exec hinted that Tumblr Live — a livestreaming video feature that Tumblr users haven’t liked — could be chopping block. He said that in 2024 Tumblr would “streamline some of the extra things that were launched (like Live) that haven’t gotten the adoption we hoped.”

    In responses to other questions, Mullenweg also said that Tumblr would “sunset or rollback some things we tried that didn’t work,” and even outright stated that Live itself will be re-assesed in January 2024 as to “whether it should be a part of the Tumblr app anymore.”

    How Tumblr is dealing with trolls?

    The troll question was a bit off-topic in terms of Tumblr’s future as a business, and instead spoke to the future of the site’s culture. Mullenweg said that he believes “super trolls” only account for less than 0.5% of Tumblr’s user base. Still, they can have an outsized impact, he admitted.

    Despite the staff changes, the company plans to increase its investment in Trust & Safety — the team that deals with bots, trolling, attacks, and hate speech — and will ban accounts engaging in these behaviors. It will also prevent those trolls from registering new accounts and repeating their behavior, he said.

    What’s going on with the ActivityPub integration for Tumblr?

    Mullenweg announced a year ago that Tumblr would add support for ActivityPub, the decentralized social networking protocol that supports apps like Twitter competitor Mastodon and others. But, apparently, that project has been put on the back burner. A Tumblr employee said it’s now something on the “Tumblr Labs” list and is being evaluated.

    In the AMA, Mullenweg only vaguely cleared up the confusion over the state of the project by saying that:

    “Every future for Tumblr that I’m involved in will include it being more open, supporting more standards, APIs, and open source.” 

    Will Tumblr un-ban porn?

    Nope. Art is allowed, but not “hardcore stuff,” Mullenweg said.

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  • Committee for Children Joins Forces with Aperture Education to Integrate Assessments and Curriculum to Build Social-Emotional Skills

    Committee for Children Joins Forces with Aperture Education to Integrate Assessments and Curriculum to Build Social-Emotional Skills

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    Charlotte N.C. – Aperture Education, a Riverside Insights company and the leading provider of social-emotional skills assessment and intervention solutions, and Committee for Children, the leading provider of social-emotional curriculum programs in the U.S., announced today that they will partner to offer four co-developed assessments to support schools in demonstrating the impact of evidence-based social and emotional programs. 

    Built from the Aperture DESSA suite, these assessments complement Committee for Children’s Second Step® programs, which are research-based social-emotional learning (SEL) curricula developed to nurture SEL in children’s daily lives, both in and outside of the classroom. By having integrated assessment and curriculum tools, educators can gain valuable insights from reliable, real-time data about instructional effectiveness and the impact of SEL curriculum on students.

    “As schools introduce social-emotional learning into their curriculum, it’s imperative to show how these investments translate into improved outcomes for their students. Years of evidence show how Second Step improves critical life skills and mental wellbeing,” said Riverside Insights CEO Vivek Kartha. “We are proud to collaborate with the Committee for Children and contribute to improving student outcomes by aligning our gold standard DESSA assessments with their world-class curriculum.”

    Committee for Children’s research- and evidence-based Second Step programs include SEL curricula for early learning through middle school, with additional offerings for out-of-school time and adults. Second Step programs are used in 45,000 schools across all 50 states and reach 26.9 million children worldwide annually. Second Step helps students build vital skills for success, like effective communication, resilience and problem-solving. Research shows that teaching these life skills has positive, lasting effects on students, including improved academic achievement in areas such as math, reading and writing.

    Aperture’s strengths-based assessments for Second Step are standardized, nationally normed and exceed professional standards for psychometric rigor. They will enable educators in grades K-8 to assess a student’s social and emotional skills in less than five minutes and offer middle school students the ability to self-report. Empowered with their own results, students gain agency to offer a key voice in their learning and development. Educators can access student data in real-time via Aperture’s highly scalable platform, and users will find it easy to navigate between the two company’s offerings. This collaboration ensures that users can access results aligned to program language and appropriately measure skills that are taught through Second Step.

    “Our partnership with Aperture enables us to offer our school community partners something they’ve been seeking: a high-quality assessment tool aligned to their Second Step curriculum,” said Committee for Children CEO Andrea Lovanhill. “By bringing easy-to-use, data-driven DESSA assessments to schools using our Second Step programs, teachers and support staff will have access to data that quickly and reliably illustrates whether students are learning the skills taught through the program and growing their competencies, as well as where additional instructional support may be needed. This partnership provides school and district leaders with a validated assessment to identify which classrooms and schools need additional implementation support and gives them a way to evaluate the return on their investment in the Second Step program.”

    This first-of-its-kind partnership will support district decision making as school budgets are growing tighter and education leaders look to vendors to prove that their products are producing outcomes for students and seek ways to get more value from existing products. 

    The assessments will be available for Second Step schools to purchase in early 2024. For more information, email info@apertureed.com

    About Committee for Children

    Committee for Children is a global nonprofit that has championed the safety and well-being of children through bullying prevention, child protection, and social-emotional learning for more than 40 years. With a history of action and influence, we’re known as a leader in social-emotional education and a force in advocacy, research, and innovation in the field. We take a comprehensive approach to SEL, promoting social-emotional well-being from birth to early adulthood—supporting not just classrooms, but entire communities. As our programs impact the lives of more than 26.9 million children per year, we rise to meet societal challenges to ensure children everywhere can thrive. Visit cfchildren.org to learn more.

    About Aperture Education

    Aperture Education has empowered over 6,500 schools and out-of-school time programs across North America to measure, strengthen, and support social and emotional competence in K-12 youth and educators. The Aperture System includes the DESSA suite of strength-based assessments, aligned intervention strategies, and robust reporting, all in one easy-to-use digital platform. This system enables education leaders to make strategic, data-based decisions to champion mental wellbeing, support life skill development, and foster stronger communities within their organizations. Aperture has supported more than three million students in their social and emotional growth and continues to develop innovative solutions to bring the whole child into focus. To learn more, visit www.ApertureEd.com

    About Riverside Insights

    Riverside Insights, one of the nation’s leading and most long-standing developers of research-based assessments, is led by a powerful mission: to provide insights that help elevate potential and enrich the lives of students, patients, employees, and organizations globally. For more information, visit www.RiversideInsights.com.

    eSchool News Staff
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  • HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

    HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

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    Hurricane Lee remains a large, major hurricane that is creating dangerous surf and rip currents off the U.S. East Coast as it bears down on a reporter standing in a small rowboat one thousand miles off the coast of North Carolina.

     

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    Hurricane Bears Down on Reporter Standing in Rowboat in Middle of Atlantic

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  • HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

    HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

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    For centuries, but even more so over the past few years as governments have finally started to acknowledge encounters with extraterrestrial spacecraft, humans have been wondering over the intentions of our alien visitors…

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    Merrick

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  • HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

    HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

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    Early into the first debate ahead of the 2024 presidential election, eight Republican candidates were asked whether they thought anything was wrong with Britney Spears. None did.

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    Merrick

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  • HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

    HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

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    Former Vice President Mike Pence was arrested for urinating in a public fountain in Cedar Rapids, Iowa yesterday, the latest in a rash of crimes being committed by Republican presidential candidates shifting tactics in response to mounting data showing that the indictments against Donald Trump have only helped him strengthen his front-runner status for the 2024 GOP nomination.

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  • HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

    HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

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    Besieged on all sides by the armies of Joe Biden’s shadowy Deep State empire for the crime of trying to make America great again, Donald Trump needs our help now more than ever. The following are some ways you and your family can save money to use to contribute more to our President’s legal defense fund:

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    Merrick

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  • HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

    HumorFeed – Bending the News Until it Breaks

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    Florida Governor Ron DeSantis on Monday signed a bill stripping manatees of their state protections over reports of homosexual behavior.

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    Merrick

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