Looking for love? You’ve come to the right place. Why go to a singles bar or a farmer’s market when you could stumble into a slow-burn romance from the comfort of your own home? After all, who’s got the time for a chaotic and messy love affair? With bills to pay and deadlines to hit, who wouldn’t choose a quiet and consistent love over something explosive and short-lived? Less of a headache to manage. Not all love is incendiary; sometimes it starts with a little spark rather than emotional gasoline, but as the years pass, the flames burn all the hotter. These 10 best slow-burn romances? Each one is a cinematic bonfire.
Portrait of a Lady on Fire
(Pyramide Films)
Directed by Portrait of a Lady on Fire, Céline Sciamma’s Portrait of a Lady on Fire is peak period romance. Set in the 18th century on a remote French island, the film revolves around Marianne and Héloïse—the flint and tinder for the ultimate sapphic slow-burn. Hired to paint Héloïse’s portrait before she’s married off to a nobleman, Marriane spends hours each day gazing into the stunning face of her subject, and that subject studies her with equal intensity. You know that Nietzsche quote about abysses and their penchant for staring into you? In this case, the abyss in question is Héloïse’s eyes, reflecting Marianne’s hidden desires back at her. A dreamlike portrait of lovepainted against a rugged coastline, this film is as flammable as an oil painting and equally beautiful to look at.
Paris, Texas
(Argos Films)
Directed by Wim Wenders, Paris, Texas features a romance so slow-burning that you won’t evennotice it until the film’s finale. It’s the story of Travis Henderson, a man wandering the west Texas wilderness with nothing but a gallon water jug for company. After collapsing at a gas station, Travis is rescued by his estranged brother and taken back to California, where his young son Hunter has been waiting for him for four years. While Hunter’s mother doesn’t appear until the final act, her absence is felt throughout the film, which culminates in a devastating reunion between two old flames, ignited one last time. What drove Travis and his long-lost beloved apart? Financial hardship? Emotional neglect? Maybe something deeper still, the weight of repressed desires bubbling up to the surface and blasting the pair apart. Be warned, this film is a real tear-jerker.
Carol
(The Weinstein Company/ StudioCanal UK/Scanbox Entertainment)
Adapted from Patricia Highsmith’s The Price of Salt, Todd Haynes’ Carol is the story of Therese Belivet, a struggling young photographer whose days of retail worker hell are brightened by the appearance of the titular soon-to-be divorcee. Though Carol and Therese are over a decade apart in age and involved with men, these romantic obstacles are merely fuel for their slow-burning fire. Set in the mid-20th century, Carol is a quiet rebellion against a heteronormative world. While Therese and Carol can’t burn their closed-minded society to the ground, they can at least tend a flame of resistance with every stolen kiss and glance. And while all ten of the slow-burning films on this list are pop culture touchstones, Carol is the only one that launched its own internet meme—”they’re lesbians, Harold.” Yes, Harold, they are, and there’s is one of the greatest love stories of all time.
In the Mood for Love
(Block 2 Pictures)
Directed by Wong Kar-wai, In the Mood for Love isn’t just one of the greatest slow-burn romances of all time, it’s one of the greatest films ever made. Set in early 1960s Hong Kong, the film follows next-door neighbors Chow and Su, who learn that their respective spouses are having an affair. As the pair piece together the details of their lovers’ infidelity, a slow-burning spark ignites between them. The ultimate romantic tragedy, In the Mood for Love is the culmination of missed connections and unspoken desires. Despite being perfect for one another, Chow and Su’s turbulent emotions cause them to continually blow past each other. We are the sum of all our past lovers, and sometimes those past lovers leave serious marks. Sometimes, we’re hurt so bad that we can’t heal in time for new love to take root. Chow and Su are both holding a candle for each other, but they keep turning away.
Only Lovers Left Alive
(Sony Pictures Classics)
Directed by Jim Jarmusch, Only Lovers Left Alive is the story of Adam and Eve—not the biblical apple eaters, but a vampire couple whose love story is equally ancient. Living on opposite ends of the world, the pair are attempting to keep their spark alive by any means necessary. Spending your life with the person you love most in the world sounds romantic, but when that life could potentially last forever, you’ve gotta get creative to keep the romance feeling fresh. In this case, that means wandering Tangiers, working on rock albums, and trying to resist the urge to commit suicide. An existential meditation on romance and un-life, this film questions whether or not everlasting love is really all it’s cracked up to be. Slow-burn? Adam and Eve have kept the flame alive for centuries, and may have to tend it for millenia more.
Lost In Translation
(Focus Features)
Sofia Coppola’s Lost In Translation proves that some of the brightest slow-burns burn briefly. Aging movie star Bob Harris has come to Japan to shoot whiskey commercials and get some distance from his failing marriage. Meanwhile, young Yale graduate Charlotte is stuck with her husband, a famous photographer who often leaves her alone. After commiserating at their hotel bar, Bob and Charlotte strike up an unlikely relationship—one not founded on physical chemistry, but emotional fulfillment. The only two members of their own secret lonely hearts club, Bob and Charlotte grow closer through late-night conversation and sake-fueled karaoke performances. Will they end up together? Probably not. Should they? Debatable. Will you want them to? Absolutely yes.
Pride and Prejudice
(Focus Features)
An adaptation of the most influential slow-burn romance novel ever penned, Joe Wright’s Pride and Prejudice is an equally seminal piece of romance cinema. Unless you’ve been living under a rock the size of Mr. Darcy’s ego at novel’s beginning, you’re familiar with the gist of its sweeping enemies-to-lovers plot. One could say that Darcy and Elizabeth were burning for one another at their first meeting, but the fuel of that fire changed from hate to love by the story’s end. As the pair slowly begin to let go of their negative preconceptions each other, they create room for affection to grow. When that pair consists of Keira Knightley and Matthew Macfadyen, the film’s audience is sure to be equally smitten.
If Beale Street Could Talk
(Annapurna Pictures)
Directed by Barry Jenkins, If Beale Street Could Talk isn’t a “will they/won’t they” sort of slow-burn, it’s a “how can this fire possibly stay alive?” Told through a series of non-linear flashbacks, the film follows childhood friends turned lifelong lovers Tish and Fonny, whose relationship is tested by the cruel realities of a corrupt justice system. Arrested for a horrific crime he didn’t commit, Fonny is left to languish in prison, while Tish attempts to convince an uncaring world of her lover’s innocence. Though the film refuses to shy away from the brutal realities that people of color face in the United States carceral system, it’s ultimately a tender testament to the resilience of love. Despite the years, the distance, and the devastation, the fire never goes out.
Millennium Actress
(The KlockWorx)
Directed by Satoshi Kon, Millennium Actress isn’t your traditional slow-burn romance—Kon is anything but traditional, after all. The plot follows two documentarians who are set to interview Chiyoko Fujiwara, a famous Japanese actress who mysteriously vanished from the spotlight decades before. As the pair piece together the details of the now-elderly Chiyoko’s life, they learn that her illustrious career wasn’t fueled by artistic ambition, but by unfulfilled love. After falling head over heels for a runaway political dissident as a teen, Chiyoko took a job as an actress to travel the world in search of him. The slow-burn romance in this film is fueled entirely by Chiyoko’s devotion; she holds a candle for her lost lover across the decades, hoping to be reunited someday. But does Chiyoko truly love the mysterious man whose name she never learned, or just the pursuit of him? Maybe a little of both? That’s something for the documentary crew to figure out.
Past Lives
(A24)
Directed by Celine Song, Past Lives is the story of Na Young and Hae Sung, whose slow-burn connection was sparked when they were twelve years old. Separated after her parents moved away from South Korea, Na Young, now renamed Nora, discovers that Hae Sung has been looking for her for over a decade. The pair attempt to reconnect, but distance and other relationships continually prevent them from rekindling their love. The film is a meditation on the concept of inyeon—an untranslateable Korean word for a love that has lasted across past lives. Nora and Hae Sung may not end up together in this lifetime, but they’re destined for one another in the next, or perhaps the next after that. This is a slow-burn romance of cosmic proportions.
Sarah Fimm (they/them) is actually nine choirs of biblically accurate angels crammed into one pair of $10 overalls. They have been writing articles for nerds on the internet for less than a year now. They really like anime. Like… REALLY like it. Like you know those annoying little kids that will only eat hotdogs and chicken fingers? They’re like that… but with anime. It’s starting to get sad.
With Valentine’s Day on Saturday, a new survey shows that more Americans are looking for financial stability in a partner than for romance.
The survey, from Ramsey Solutions’ Q4 State of Personal Finance, found 63% of respondents said they’d prefer a partner who is financially secure but not very exciting over one who is romantic but bad with money.
56% also said they never had a serious conversation about money with their partner before getting married.
The numbers come as so many Coloradans continue to worry about finances.
Around 75,000 Coloradans lost their health coverage when Affordable Care Act subsidies expired at the start of 2026, and hundreds of thousands more saw their premiums skyrocket. Interest rates are higher than many would like.
And the latest inflation data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics shows prices rose 0.3% in December and 2.7% over the last year—the Bureau’s new January numbers will be released on Friday, 2/13.
“It isn’t really wanting to be with someone who has a lot of money, but wanting to be with someone stable and financially secure,” said University of Denver psychology research professor Galena Rhoades. “That’s a reflection of values: drive, motivation, but also that need for stability and security, especially in a time when things feel uncertain.”
Denver7 asked Rhoades if that means values can change over time depending on what’s happening nationally. She said “yes.”
“I think our values are malleable in many ways,” Rhoades added. “Maybe not our core values, but how we value different values and prioritize different values, especially with respect to what’s going on in our country.”
She pointed to 2016 as another example. After President Donald Trump was elected in his first term, Rhoades says more people paid attention to a prospective partner’s political leanings as a prerequisite.
“One of the things that we’re missing is actually the opportunity to observe someone in real life from a little bit of a distance,” Rhoades said. “So, if you meet someone at school, at work, through friends, you often get this opportunity to see them for some time before you fall in love with them, before you go on a first date, and and I think that’s missing in dating today, sort of the opportunity to observe someone and learn from how you see them in the real world.”
Rhoades emphasized that the increase in financial stability doesn’t mean people no longer value romanticism.
“I actually would bet that that doesn’t mean that people are valuing romance, love, and connection any less,” she said. “I think we’re seeing that that is elevated, that people want a partner who’s secure and stable, but not that we see a decrease in romance or love as part of that.
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What’s the smell in the air? Is it roses? Chocolate? Body odor? No, it’s love! What’s not to love about a love story? They bring us joy. They make us cry. And most of all, they help us to believe in the idea that love is possible—that there’s somewhere out there waiting for every one of us. While the 21st-century dating pool can sometimes feel like a dating-app drenched situationship swamp, these ten films give us hope for love. Here they are, the ten best romance movies of the 21st century. The next time you’re thinking about dinner and movie with that special someone, why not take them to see one of these?
Portrait of A Lady On Fire
Directed by Céline Sciamma, Portrait of A Lady On Fire is described as a sapphic period romance—I was sold from that sentence alone. Set in the 18th century, the story follows a painter named Marianne who travels to a distant island to paint the portrait of Héloïse, a young woman soon to be married off to a nobleman from Milan. As Titanic suggests, portrait painting is a rather romantic activity—lots of intense staring at one another for hours on end. As the painter observes the paintee, the paintee looks back into her, and finds a similar longing hiding in the expression on her face. You know that thing Nietzsche said about staring into abysses and how they stare back into you? For Marianne, the abyss is Héloïse’s eyes; she feels like she could just fall in—and Héloïse’s gaze suggests the same.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
(Focus Features)
Michel Gondry’s Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind stars Kate Winslet and Jim Carry, the latter trading his “laugh out loud” antics for a more “cry in silence” performance style. Carrey plays Joel Barish, a recently brokenhearted man who undergoes an experimental procedure to forget his ex entirely—after the devastating realization that she’s already had the procedure done herself. As Joel backtracks through his memories of his beloved Clementine, the viewer is given a dreamlike glimpse into their relationship: the highs, the lows, the moments where it all went wrong, and the things that could make it right again. A thoroughly gut-wrenching film inspired by an equally intestines-gouging poem by Alexander Pope, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is a hopeful portrayal of nearly-doomed love.
Lost In Translation
(Focus Features)
If you’re looking for steamy hookup scenes, scroll on—Lost In Translation is about so much more than that. It’s the story of aging movie star Bob Harris, who travels to Tokyo to appear in a whiskey ad—and get a little distance from his failing marriage. During his frequent visits to the hotel bar, Bob strikes up a friendship with Charlotte, a young Yale grad stuck shadowing her celebrity photographer husband. The pair bond over their mutual loneliness, two strangers in a strange land, estranged from the people that they’re supposed to feel closest to. The film trades sexual intimacy for emotional intimacy, the far more vulnerable of the pair. Bob and Charlotte share their hopes, dreams, disappointments, and a few laughs—all knowing that their love can never be.
Carol
(The Weinstein Company)
An adaptation of Patricia Highsmith’s novel The Price of Salt, Todd Haynes’ Carol is the story of Therese Belivet, an aspiring photographer stuck working in a department store during the 1952 Christmas season—could there be anything worse? Her customer service worker woes are momentarily forgotten when she meets Carol, a glamorous, soon-to-be-divorced older woman who holds her gaze just a little longer than normal. And so begins a clandestine sapphic romance for the ages, two women engaging in a silent, sensual rebellion against the stiflingly heteronormative society that surrounds them. Aside from its glorious “Harold, they’re lesbians” internet meme claim to fame, Carol is a staggering romantic drama, a piece of queer cinema royalty.
Love And Basketball
(New Line Cinema)
Directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, Love and Basketball is a romance framed like a basketball game—told across four separate quarters. The first quarter begins in Los Angeles, following the childhood friends Monica and Quincy, who bond over a mutual love of the sport. The remaining quarters follow the pair at pivotal moments in both their personal and professional lives; their affection for one another deepens as their athletic careers reach new heights. It’s a film about friendship, ambition, rivalry, and love—as well as the complicated balance both Monica and Quincy must strike with those sometimes conflicting values across their lives.
Y Tu Mama Tambien
(20th Century Studios)
Directed by Alfonso Cuarón, Y Tu Mama Tambien follows two teens who embark on the coming-of-age romance of their lives, along with a woman ten years older. Julio and Tenoch have just graduated high school, and are spending the summer doing whatever teenage boys do: in this case, jerking off into public pools and being general menaces. At a party thrown by Julio’s high society father, the pair meet Luisa, a beautiful woman in her late 20s. Attempting to impress her, they tell her that they’re about to go on a cross-country roadtrip to Boca del Cielo, a place they just made up on the spot. To their surprise, Luisa agrees to come along, and the trio cram themselves and their menage-a-tois romantic tension into a four-door and split. What begins as a film about sexual awakening blossoms into an exploration of the passage of youth. You’re only young once; might as well enjoy it while you can.
Brokeback Mountain
(Focus Features)
Directed by Ang Lee, Brokeback Mountain was perhaps the most impactful queer romance film of the 2000s, a gay cowboy love story for the masses. Set in early 190s Wyoming, the film follows cowboys Ennis Del Mar and Jack Twist—hired to work as sheep herders in the titular highland. After Jack drunkenly displays an attraction that Ennis reciprocates, the pair begin a clandestine romance out on the range that ends as messily as it began. They attempt to go back to old lives and new wives, but they soon realize that they just “can’t quit” one another—a phrase that leads to some serious tear-jerker scenes. It’s an absolutely devastating romance story, one that came at a time when romance between men was seldom shown onscreen. Brokeback Mountain trotted so gay romance modern classics like Call Me By Your Name could gallop.
In The Mood For Love
(Block 2 Pictures/Océan Films)
Directed by Wong Kar-wai, In The Mood For Love is the story of Chow Mo-wan and Su Li-zhen, two next-door neighbors whose spouses are having an affair. Frequently left alone during late nights after their lovers step out the door, the pair’s polite relationship soon blooms into something more intimate as they piece together the details of the infidelity. It’s a tender, slow-burning romance about two deeply wounded people learning to love again, their relationship complicated by the ghosts of their lovers’ past. Full of the wist and longing that made Fallen Angels one of the most impactful films of Wong Kar-wai’s career, In The Mood For Love is all the missed connection romance without any of the contract-killing—it’s probably better for Chow and Su’s relationship that way.
Let The Right One In
(Sandrew Metronome)
Adapted from a novel by John Ajvide Lindqvist, Tomas Alfredson’s Let The Right One In is a queer coming-of-age masterpiece with a twist of vampire horror. Set in a working-class suburb of Sweden, the film follows a bullied young boy named Oskar who befriends his neighbor Eli, a mysterious girl who only comes out at night. As exsanguinated bodies start piling up around town, Oskar puts two and two together. But does he care that his new best friend is a creature of the night? Not in the slightest. In fact, he wants to go steady. A story about needs and neglect, Let The Right One In cautions the viewer to carefully consider the people they allow into their lives. Considering his alcoholic father, his clueless mother, and his abusive classmates, it’s no surprise that Eli is the person Oskar loves the most: she’s the only person on Earth who can truly protect him.
Her
(Warner Bros.)
Directed by Spike Jonze, Her is the story of a love affair between man and machine. Devastated by his coming divorce, Theodore Twombly buys a copy of OS¹: an AI capable of adapting itself to the user’s needs. After asking him a few questions about his mother, the OS soon reintroduces itself as Samantha—and its subsequent interactions with Theodore become disarmingly personal and maybe even… flirty? As Theo and Sam grow closer, their romance is challenged by Theo’s closest human relationships, including his ex-wife. Her is a strangely prophetic film, as more and more people are turning to language models like ChatGPT for emotional support—and AI is giving increasingly emotionally intelligent responses. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck (metaphorically speaking), then according to Theo, it might be time to take AI on a date.
Sarah Fimm (they/them) is actually nine choirs of biblically accurate angels crammed into one pair of $10 overalls. They have been writing articles for nerds on the internet for less than a year now. They really like anime. Like… REALLY like it. Like you know those annoying little kids that will only eat hotdogs and chicken fingers? They’re like that… but with anime. It’s starting to get sad.
The cure for winter blues? Some good old-fashioned screen time, and maybe living vicariously through film and TV characters stealing away to a cottage for a romantic interlude.
In the finale of Heated Rivalry, titled “The Cottage,” Russian hockey player Ilya Rozanov (Connor Storrie) tells Canadian fellow athlete Shane Hollander (Hudson Williams), “I’m coming to the cottage,” referring to the lakefront home where Shane invites Ilya to spend the offseason with him. On the surprise-hit show about a secret romance between rival hockey pros, Shane’s cottage offers a sanctuary away from prying eyes, allowing Ilya and Shane to test the waters on bringing their decade-long secret relationship out of the shadows. Outside, the pressures and risks of publicly revealing their relationship loom. But inside, they are untouched by such concerns, and therefore free to be together.
Ilya isn’t the only one who accepted an invitation to the cottage. Heated Rivalry, produced by the virtually unknown Canadian streamer Crave and then licensed by HBO Max, where it premiered in late November with little promotion, has become the talk of the town. Celebrities from Pedro Pascal to Ayo Edebiri have expressed love for the series on social media. “You’re Ilya and I’m Shane,” Andy Cohen told Anderson Cooper as they celebrated New Year’s Eve together on CNN. When asked what she was watching in a recent Instagram video, Donatella Versacereplied, “Is that even a question? Take me to the cottage already.”
With no premiere date in sight for Heated Rivalry’s next installment, the fourth season of Bridgerton will offer audiences another cottage to visit when it arrives in two four-episode drops: the first on January 29, and the second on February 26. In the new season, Benedict Bridgerton (Luke Thompson) whisks Sophie (new cast member Yerin Ha) away to the Bridgerton family’s country estate, referred to as “my cottage,” after saving the maid from an assault by her new employer. Upon first seeing the palatial property, Sophie observes that “cottage feels somewhat…misleading.”
An already injured Benedict falls ill overnight, and Sophie nurses him back to health as they share the kind of intimate moments only afforded to them inside the confines of the cottage. When they return to polite society, with Benedict getting Sophie a job working for the Bridgerton family, they remain physically close but are emotionally distanced by social class. “I do miss our time in the countryside,” a uniformed Sophie opines.
If you or a loved one are experiencing withdrawal symptoms, whether while waiting for your chance to dogear pages of your very own, or for the next episode of the show to drop, VF asked hockey romance aficionados about their recommendations for books fans may want to reach for.
Canadian Boyfriend, Jenny Holiday
‘Canadian Boyfriend’ by Jenny Holiday
Elizabeth Held, co-founder of the Really Reading Romance Book Club, writer of the What to Read If newsletter, and author of the upcoming nonfiction book Romancelandia, highlighted Jenny Holiday’s Canadian Boyfriend, a straight romance that “doesn’t actually have that much hockey in it.” (“A surprising number of hockey romances do not actually feature a ton of hockey,” Held says.) She called it a book “about people in their late 30s figuring out their baggage, under the guise of a hockey romance.” Held especially loves the audiobook edition, narrated by actor Joshua Jackson. “I think it’s just totally fabulous and very fun that he went from playing a hockey player as a teenager in The Mighty Ducks, and then narrating this book as an adult hockey player. It’s just a nice easter egg.”
Face Off (D.C. Stars Book #1), Chelsea Curto
‘Face Off’ by Chelsea Curto
Held calls Chelsea Curto “an up-and-coming star in the romance world, particularly for hockey,” thanks to her D.C. Stars series. “If you are still mourning the cancellation of Pitch, this is your book, because it’s about the first female NHL player,” Held says of Face Off, the first book in the series. That trailblazing player finds chemistry (that she wasn’t looking for) with a male teammate, making for a spicy rivals-to-lovers plotline.
Shoot Your Shot, Lexi LaFleur Brown
‘Shoot Your Shot’ by Lexi LaFleur Brown
Talk about an insider point of view: Who better to write a hockey romance than someone who has lived one? Lexi LaFleur Brown, whose books include Shoot Your Shot and the upcoming Evening the Score, is married to former NHL player JT Brown. Held hails Brown as “a new author who’s interesting, especially in this moment,” pointing out Brown’s deep roots not just in hockey, but in the hockey romance online community. “She rose to prominence on BookTok, specifically by dissecting hockey romances and what they got right or wrong.” Expert source? Check and check.
Ice Knights series, Avery Flynn
‘Parental Guidance’ by Avery Flynn
Avery Flynn’s Ice Knights series, beginning with Parental Guidance, is “genuinely hilarious,” Held says. “Those books make me laugh out loud.”
Check, Please! Ngozi Ukazu
‘Check, Please!’ by Ngozi Ukazu
Some hockey romances are graphic in the sexytimes sense. Others are graphic as in…illustrated. Such is the case with Check, Please!, a two-volume queer hockey rom-com in graphic novel form. “I feel like it’s a little bit of a cult favorite,” Held says. “The main character, Bitty, is a gay southern baker, and he’s in college on a hockey scholarship. He lives in kind of a frat house with his fellow hockey players, but they are all really supportive of him and his sexuality and his quest for love. Maybe there’s a little bit of a spark between him and the older team captain. It’s one of those ones that either you love it, or you haven’t heard of it.”
Him, Sarina Bowen and Elle Kennedy
‘Him’ by Sarina Bowen and Elle Kennedy
Laura McCormack, another avid romance reader, says she recommends “literally everything” by Sarina Bowen. Megan, who devours at least one hockey romance a week (and asked to be identified by only her first name), says that a series Bowen co-wrote with Elle Kennedy was her gateway into the genre. “Him and Us were maybe my first,” and then she was hooked.
Rookie Move, Sarina Bowen
‘Rookie Move’ by Sarina Bowen
If you’re ready to settle into an entire extended universe of love and hockey, McCormack recommends Bowen’s Boston Bruisers series, beginning with Rookie Move. “That one is just delicious,” she says. “It’s straight and it’s got spice, but it’s got a lot of heart, and kick-ass heroines who are successful in their own right. It’s fun because it has tie-ins to other series. It’s the hockey player and his brother, and his brother works for the security team, and then you get to go and read the series for the security team. It’s great.”
The Deal, Elle Kennedy
‘The Deal’ by Elle Kennedy
McCormack also loves Kennedy’s Off-Campus series, beginning with The Deal, which features college-aged characters and plenty of spin-offs. “Now they’re on the second generation [of characters],” she says. “ I was listening to one of the second-generation ones on a plane, and I gasped so loud at the reveal part that I scared the man next to me. It was a really good time.”
The Shots You Take, Rachel Reid
‘The Shots You Take’ by Rachel Reid
Reid has more to offer than just Heated Rivalry and the Game Changers series. Reader Megan recommends Reid’s standalone book The Shots You Take, another queer hockey romance, this one set in a small town and featuring two ex-friends mapping out their shared future. “I love it,” she says. “It’s set over many, many years. It’s a second-chance romance, there’s some yearning, reconnecting, and finding their way back to each other.”
Like Real People Do, E.L. Massey
‘Like Real People Do’ by E.L. Massey
Enemies to lovers, public image versus private life, young love, yearning, and ice rinks? Like Real People Do, the first installment in E.L. Massey’s Breakaway series, has all that and more. Capizola recommends this title especially to those who enjoyed the third episode of Heated Rivalry, which explores similar themes, “like how fame impacts the ability for you to be yourself.” This queer hockey romance follows a young pro player and an online hockey influencer as their relationship evolves. Plus, Massey has fun playing with the bad boy hockey player stereotype, with Capizola describing the main character as, “I’m not just a jock, I have feelings!”
Puckboys series, Eden Finley and Saxon James
‘Egotistical Puckboy’ by Eden Finley and Saxon James
You know what “puck” rhymes with? Yeah, expect a lot of that in the 10-book (so far) Puckboys series, co-written by Eden Finley and Saxon James. The first book is Egotistical Puckboy, and each installment follows a different queer hockey couple. McCormack loves this series when you’re in the mood for something that’s “silly and filthy and gentle on plot.” Once you burn through all 10, don’t worry: The two authors have multiple other hockey series to add to your TBR list.
And when hockey comes up in conversation, she doesn’t hesitate to mention the reading material that brought her to the sport: “If someone wants to talk to me about hockey, I will absolutely talk to them about hockey. If they ask, ‘Oh, why did you get into it?’ I’m like, ‘Oh, my God, have you heard of hockey romance? It’s amazing.’”
And if they yuck her yum, showing disdain for queer hockey smut, then she knows they’re not for her: “If I have to dim the things I’m excited about in order to be cool to someone, then I don’t want to be their friend,” she says.
The cross-fandom pollination has gone in the opposite direction as well.
“I’ve seen hockey reporters say, like, I’ve got a bunch of new followers, if you want to learn the game, like, what do you want to know?” Held says. Show creator Jacob Tierney has been a guest on the hockey podcast What Chaos, and the Empty Netters podcast now recaps each Heated Rivalry episode. “I love it when people find a new passion. So I hope this leads to romance readers becoming hockey fans and hockey fans becoming romance readers, right? And then ideally, we would get a romance novel in like a year or two about people, one person from each fandom and how they fell in love together.”
The breakout success of the show has felt validating to readers, who hope to see more like it in the future, including plotlines of acceptance, diversity, and anti-homophobia that Reid explores in the series, which Held calls “very explicitly a critique of the NHL.”
In the here and now, however, romance enthusiasts are thrilled with the show’s success, and ready to welcome new fans into the fold.
“There’s a cool feeling of like, oh my God, we’ve known about this for so long,” Capizola says. “People are like, where did this come from? And we’re all like, it’s been here, welcome. There’s, like, seven more books [in the series].”
Content Warnings: violence, war, fire, heartbreak, betrayal
Summary:An irresistibly winning romantic historical adventure, set in medieval Japan and tinged with fantasy, revolving around the art of waka poetry.
Matsuo is expected to be a samurai, like his father before him. But as he is training in the art of war, he realises he was destined for a different art altogether. Turning his back on his future as a warrior of the sword, he decides instead to do battle with words, as a poet.
Thus begins a story of intrigue and adventure, passion and betrayal. Matsuo’s quest to find his true self, and his true love, takes him across medieval Japan, through bloody battlefields and burning cities. But his ultimate test will be the uta awase – a tournament where Japan’s greatest poets engage in fierce verbal combat for the honour of victory, and where Matsuo will find himself fighting for his life.
The Samurai of the Red Carnation is both a thrilling, swashbuckling adventure and a sensitive meditation on love and poetry. Denis Thériault, is known for his award-winning novel, The Peculiar Life of a Lonely Postman, which also made extensive use of original poetry in Japanese styles and which won the author the Japan-Canada Book Prize.
Image Source: Courtesy of Penguin Random House
Imagine training with a sword and realizing your true weapon is a poem. Denis Thériault’s novel mixes swashbuckling adventure with tender romance in a lyrical way. It’s like watching a grand samurai film with a poetry score. From its vivid medieval Japan scenes to an epic poetry duel, the story feels fresh and full of wonder. For those of you who crave both adrenaline and artistry, this tale delivers something truly new!
The Samurai of the Red Carnation follows Matsuo, born into a samurai family but secretly a poet. Instead of wielding a sword, he picks up a pen. Bending tradition, the biggest battles in his life shift from war to words; Matsuo must fight for his life with verses instead of blades. His journey begins with one bold choice: abandon his destiny as a warrior. That kind of passion, choosing art over duty, makes Matsuo surprisingly relatable.
A Samurai By Name, A Poet By Nature
From the start, Matsuo is torn between duty and desire. He trains as a warrior, but a secret longing for poetry calls. When he walks away from his armor, he shows courage of a different sort: the courage to follow his true self. He learns waka, a classical form of Japanese verse, from a wild Zen master on his journey. This mischievous teacher, more rogue monk than sensei, turns Matsuo’s world upside down with riddles and verses. Thériault lets us feel Matsuo’s dreams and doubts. Even when Matsuo stumbles, he remains a hero you root for!
An Ancient Japan Painted In Words
The setting is a major draw. Thériault, long fascinated by Japan, paints Heian-era Kyoto and beyond with vivid detail. You can almost smell incense in a shrine and feel the heat of a burning city. In fact, the novel opens on a night when Kyoto is ablaze, hinting at intrigue to come. Peace and turmoil live side by side: in one chapter Matsuo meditates in a garden; in the next he hides from samurai on a mountainside path. You sense an era where beauty and danger collide… where courtly grace meets clan rivalries on the horizon.
Battles Of Wit And Wordplay
Forget sword duels; the book’s fiercest fights are poetry contests called uta-awase. Picture a medieval rap battle: poets duel with clever verses and sharp insults. A panel of nobles listens as if lives depend on each line (because they often do). Losing can mean ruin. Thériault treats these word duels like life-or-death matches. Between the quips and metaphors, you really feel the tension. Fans of wordplay will relish it. Every so often, even a single line can feel as sharp as a blade!
Forbidden Love And Family Loyalties
Of course there’s romance. Matsuo falls for a princess’s attendant, a poised young woman with a secret smile, who is already promised to a powerful general. Their situation feels like star-crossed fate: an ache anyone who’s loved from afar will recognize. Even with war swirling around them, their quiet connection blooms. This romance brings real heat and heartbreak. Family expectations and battle pressures add drama! Each choice tests Matsuo’s loyalty and honor. Yet hope flickers through it all, and each setback strengthens his resolve while keeping the story moving.
Mystery, Myth, And A Touch Of Fantasy
The novel isn’t just historical… it hints at something mystical! Heian Japan was said to be “haunted by spirits of Nature,” and Thériault weaves in that sense of the uncanny. The story opens with a mysterious figure watching Kyoto burn, casting a strange shadow over Matsuo’s path. Other moments feel dreamlike: a shrine that murmurs secrets, or a poem that reads like a prophecy. The line between reality and myth blurs in small, eerie ways! These touches give the journey a magical sheen.
Thériault’s Poetic Legacy
Denis Thériault’s earlier hit The Peculiar Life of a Lonely Postman also mixed Japanese verse into its tale; it even won the Japan–Canada Book Prize. Fans of that quirky, lyrical style will find plenty here! Thériault’s prose often reads like poetry itself: carefully chosen, rhythmic, and full of gentle humor. Even the action scenes have an elegance, as if choreographed. The English version keeps that charm, making the verses and jokes land smoothly. All in all, it feels like a novel as carefully crafted as a poem.
For anyone who wonders if the pen is mightier than the sword, Matsuo’s world might have the answer!
What are your thoughts on The Samurai of the Red Carnation? You can get a copy here if you don’t have one already! Let us know all your thoughts in the comments below or over on Twitter, Instagram, or Facebook!
“One of the things that President Trump is really good at is he’s a really good listener,” says Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang
JIM WATSON/Getty Images
Some Mamdani-loving billionaire got on the horn
Long branded a horrific hellhole by Fox News, San Francisco has been bracing for Trump to deploy the National Guard to the famously liberal town since he started rolling troops into Democrat-led cities earlier this year. In October, the incursion seemed inevitable—that is, until a couple oligarchs, including billionaire Salesforce founder Marc Benioff and billionaire Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang, called Trump and told him to stand down. Trump complied.
“One of the things that President Trump is really good at is he’s a really good listener,” Huang told the SF Chronicle about the call. “If you appeal to him, logically, pragmatically, with common sense, he will listen.” Benioff’s Mamdami-aligned creds have recently taken a beating, but it wasn’t that long ago that he backed a hefty tax on large corporations to generate funds to fight homelessness. And Benioff wasa White House guest on Tuesday, at the president’s dinner to fete Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman. An ideal time, perhaps, to take the president aside and suggest a warm and friendly approach.
THP’s book team has been booked and busy all season, but we’re not complaining! From fall roundups to romance recommendations, we’ve got everything you need and then some. Be sure to check out all of our latest book reviews here!
If you’ve been looking for a pair of complementary new romance novels to crack open, we got you! These two books will go on sale on the same day: November 4th. (Convenient for when you load up your shopping cart!)
Set in Hell, Samantha Joyce’s Not Today, Satan is a YA romance between the devil’s daughter and a newly minted sinner. While H. Leighton Dickson’s adult romantasy, Ship of Spells, takes us to the high seas aboard a magical ship. We loved both these books, and here’s why!
Book Overview: Not Today, Satan
Image Source: Entangled Publishing
Content warnings: death, murder, graphic violence, gore, torture, poisoning, stabbing, hospitalization, serious injuries, guns, weapons (Please read at your discretion!)
Summary: Think your life is hell?
Try being the Prince of Darkness’s only daughter―a seventeen-year-old born and raised in Hell, destined to inherit the throne, and constantly enduring the (literal) eternal moans and screams of souls who had it coming.
The only thing worse than ruling the Underworld is working here. Day after day, it’s me, a bunch of demons who are too intimidated by my dad to befriend me, and an endless lineup of sinners. Until Nathan Reynolds shows up, with a smile that could turn brimstone to butterflies, claiming he’s innocent.
I don’t question the system; it’s never wrong. But Nate’s pleading eyes have me doubting everything I’ve ever known.
So, I’m going to do the one thing I’m not supposed to do: I’m going to help him break out. Even if it means showing Nate exactly who I am. Metaphorical horns and all.
Because if we don’t make it out of here?
We’re not just damned. We’re doomed.
Our Review
Fate works hard, but the devil’s daughter works harder! Samantha Joyce’s Not Today, Satan absolutely charmed us from the get-go. With Devica set to inherit the throne from her father Lucifer, she faces so many conflicting thoughts. After a shocking discovery, she sets out to find her mother…on Earth. And the only person who can help her is Nathan “Nate” Reynolds, a sinner who’s convinced his judgement was a mistake. Their journey to escape takes them through the realms of Hell, facing punishments, demons, and too many near-death experiences. Though technically, Nate already died.
We loved the budding romance between Devica and Nate. Nate’s cheesiness is endearing, and his kind nature eventually wins over Devica. Hell’s Princess still has a heart, after all. Her character development primes her for the throne just in time. And though we have yet to meet the devil himself, the cliffhanger ending tells us we might well be introduced in the next installment. We’ll keep our eyes out in the meantime!
Not Today, Satan by Samantha Joyce comes out November 4th, and you can order a copy of it here!
Content warnings: war, battle, perilous situations, blood, intense violence, brutal injuries, death, drowning, physical torture, and sexual activity (Please read at your discretion!)
Summary: When Ensign Bluemage Honor Renn is rescued from the wreckage of her first naval post, she expects death or disgrace. Instead, she wakes aboard the Touchstone, a mythic vessel whispered of in dockside ballads and royal war rooms alike. With a crew of misfits. A mysterious, elven captain. And a mission tied to the Dreadwall, the crumbling barrier that has kept the Overland and Nethersea from open war for a hundred years.
But the tragedy that sank her last ship didn’t just take lives―it left something behind.
Now Renn carries a secret everyone wants. A magik that’s chimeric, arcane…and slowly killing her. But the captain’s mission may be her only chance to survive, even if he still doesn’t trust her.
Caught between privateers, princes, and spies, Renn knows each choice could sink her future―or set the sea on fire.
Our Review
H. Leighton Dickson’s new adult romantic fantasy, Ship of Spells, completely transports us to the high seas! Aboard the Ship of Spells, or the Touchstone, mage-in-training Honor Renn must reluctantly sail under a captain who’s a sworn enemy of her and her people. She possesses a rare ability to channel an ancient magic, which she uses on a perilous mission to repair the Dreadwall.
The Touchstone crew was one of our favorite things about Ship of Spells. From the kindhearted ship doctor Echo to the loudmouth quartermaster Smoke, we grew to love this found family of pirates. As for the romance of this book, it’s a super slow burn between Honor and Gavriel with so many “almost there” moments that get cut short. But the wait was worth it. The open ending got us good, and we can’t wait to read more about Honor and Gavriel’s nautical journey!
Ship of Spells by H. Leighton Dickson comes out November 4th, and you can order a copy of it here!
Did you enjoy our latest review duo? Which pair of books should we review next? Let us know on Twitter! You can also find us on Facebook and Instagram.
I felt like our connection was this cynicism we had. I always thought that was interesting—you create an alliance, whether it be with a best friend or a family member, that you have this viewpoint on something, but it’s not always forever. So Joanne and Morgan shared philosophies until Joanne kind of grew out of it, and it just felt really right that that would kind of piss Morgan off. When I paired off with my husband, Simon—
Sara: What is this “paired off”? I’ve never heard you use this term.
Erin: Really? [Shrugs] I don’t know. But when Simon and I got together, Sara was very supportive and connected to him, and we didn’t have that issue.
Sara: But in life it’s hard when you’re accustomed to a certain dynamic and that dynamic shifts. Like, Erin hasn’t been to my house in two years. Normally, she’d be done with work like, “I’m coming over.” She’ll cook me dinner, she’ll put my kids to bed. She’s literally not been in my house for a year and that’s an adjustment—
Erin: Because I had a baby.
You both have been creative partners for most of your adult lives, but do obstacles in your dynamic still arise?
Sara: There’s no push-and-pull power dynamic. We both have pretty clear lanes. There’s no part of me that wants to be a writer. Erin has such an innate talent that is so specific to her. I would say she has the most important comedic voice in TV right now. She can’t say that about herself, but I can and I’m so proud of her.
Erin: Yeah, but it’s taken many years for it to fall into this natural rhythm. There’s a lot that I’m not as passionate about, like the business side of things is not as exciting to me as the creative side, but you have to have both. And it’s hard for me to have a lot of different plates spinning. I get overwhelmed. I’m good at focusing on the thing in front of me, and I think Sara’s really great at reminding us to diversify and keep the train on the tracks. The writers room monopolizes a lot of my time, so I’m really unable to be in a ton of meetings and fittings for Favorite Daughter and even development stuff for other shows. So she’s really great about being able to lead the charge on that and be understanding when I have to be in the writers room.
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before: Boy meets girl, girl seeks adventure in Paris, then girl’s complicated feelings for said boy ultimately taint her ability to actually enjoy the city of love. That scenario factors into the plot of both The Summer I Turned Pretty’s final season and the newly released Netflix rom-com The Wrong Paris—although this time, our heroines, played by Lola Tung and Miranda Cosgrove respectively, make it to Paris—and get to stay, at least for a while.
On The Summer I Turned Pretty, Belly defers her acceptance to study abroad in Paris for premature marriage with Jeremiah (Gavin Casalegno). She then comes to her senses, calling off the wedding and moving overseas, where she fights through homesickness and language barriers to build a nice little life for herself. Of course, that independence will soon be interrupted by Belly’s ex Conrad (Christopher Briney), seen buying a plane ticket to Paris in the show’s penultimate episode. But at least she was given the opportunity to test out both versions of her future before making a choice.
That’s also true of The Wrong Paris, a silly rom-com about a Bachelor-esque reality dating show that contestants are led to believe will be filmed in Paris, France, only to learn it’s actually Paris, Texas—population 25,000. Our heroine, Cosgrove’s Dawn, takes the twist in stride, vowing to compete on the show—not for love, but some prize money to fund studying at a Paris art school. “I don’t hate this,” she says of her hometown, “I just hate that this is the only thing I’ve ever known.” Then a cowboy named Trey (Pierson Fode—also, has anyone ever actually met a cowboy named Trey?) and his comically sculpted abs waltz in. “You ain’t gonna find no man like me in Paris,” he drawls, to which she replies: “Yeah, that’s the point.” Surprise, surprise, Dawn and Trey do fall in love and later strike a bicontinental compromise—she’ll finish school, then presumably come back to Texas.
Hepburn and Astaire, near 30 years in age between them, leave Paris as husband-and-wife in Funny Face.LMPC/Getty Images
Paris has long been a place for lovers onscreen. Casablanca (1942) famously ends with Humphrey Bogart’s Rick telling Ingrid Bergman’s Ilsa that they’ll always have their time in Paris, even if they can’t end up together. The European city has gotten in the way of a whole lot of love affairs ever since. Perhaps no one was more familiar with this than poor Audrey Hepburn, who starred in six films set in the City of Light throughout the 1950s and ’60s, most of which end with the idea that her lovelorn character would presumably rather return to the United States with a man twice her age than walk along the Seine solo. (Case in point: Hepburn choosing Bogart in 1954’s Sabrina—a frequent reference on TheSummer I Turned Pretty, and then Fred Astaire in 1957’s Funny Face—which has been repeatedly mentioned on Netflix’s Emily in Paris.)
Somewhere along the way, Paris became the go-to plot device standing in between a single woman and her love interest. The city represented female independence and agency—a culturally rich alternative to the happily ever after established in fairy tales.
On ’90s to early aughts TV, Paris became a surefire tactic for injecting drama into long-running “will they or won’t they?” couples. Shannen Doherty’s Brenda flees her dramatic on-again-off-again dynamic with Luke Perry’s Dylan on Beverly Hills, 90210 for a summer study-abroad program. Sarah Jessica Parker’s beret-clad Carrie Bradshaw now famously hurls a McDonald’s “le Big Mac” upon learning that “Big is moving to Paris,” in Sex and the City season two. Then her own Parisian journey with Frenchman Aleksandr Petrovsky (Mikhail Baryshnikov) is cut short in the series finale once Big (Chris Noth) shows up to bring her back home. On another hotly anticipated final episode, Jennifer Aniston’s Rachel Green considers moving overseas with her toddler-aged daughter for a fresh start working at Louis Vuitton after years of across-the-hall pining for David Schwimmer’s Ross. But these flights of fancy don’t last long—a brief layover on the way to domesticated bliss right back where they started.
Love looks different in every state, but shared values, stability, and kindness top the list no matter where you live.
NEW YORK, May 14, 2025 (Newswire.com)
– A new nationwide survey from Ritani, a leading online jeweler specializing in engagement rings and fine jewelry, reveals how dating preferences differ across the United States – and which states have the most defined expectations when it comes to finding a partner.
After surveying more than 2,400 adults from 48 states, Ritani’s team developed a Dating Standards Index to measure how particular residents are about their potential partners. The results show a fascinating glimpse into the modern dating mindset, from desired income levels to dealbreakers like tipping habits and sense of humor. Read more and see an infographic here: https://www.ritani.com/blogs/news/dating-standards-preferences-survey
Top States with the Highest Dating Standards
According to the data, Utah tops the list with the highest dating standards score, followed closely by California, New York, Maryland, and North Carolina. Respondents in these states reported being more selective about a wide range of partner qualities, from lifestyle alignment to long-term compatibility.
“Utah’s ranking speaks to its strong emphasis on shared values, while residents in fast-paced states like California and New York appear to be more selective with how they spend their time,” said a spokesperson from Ritani.
Conversely, South Carolina, Kentucky, North Dakota, Massachusetts, and West Virginia had the lowest scores, suggesting a more flexible or open approach to dating.
What Americans Value Most in a Partner
The study also uncovered national dating trends that highlight what matters most to people across the country:
Salary matters – but just barely: Americans prefer a partner who earns at least $50,184 annually, just above the national median wage.
Stability over flash: 46% of respondents say they prefer dating someone with a stable job, though 54% are flexible if work is inconsistent.
Education is not a dealbreaker: 8 in 10 are open to dating someone without a Bachelor’s degree.
Humor is everything: A whopping 79% say not having a sense of humor is a dealbreaker.
Fitness counts: 54% value physical fitness, but more for lifestyle compatibility than appearance.
Shared values matter: 70% say they wouldn’t date someone with very different political or social views.
Other surprising dealbreakers include carrying significant debt (49%), not tipping well (47%), and lacking strong opinions (40%).
Celebrating Love in All Its Forms
“These results show that while preferences vary widely, the heart of modern dating is rooted in personality, shared values, and how someone shows up in the world,” the Ritani spokesperson added. “Whether you’re just starting to date or ready for something serious, finding someone who feels right is the most important standard of all.”
As daters across the U.S. define what they want in a partner, Ritani continues to support love at every stage – from first sparks to proposals. When you’re ready for your next chapter, explore Ritani’s curated selection of engagement rings and fine jewelry designed to mark life’s most meaningful moments.
Virtual worlds and online gaming have become a new source of meaning, purpose, and belonging in today’s world, especially for those who struggle with loneliness, social anxiety, or physical disabilities. The new documentary The Remarkable Life of Ibelin shares the inspiring story of Mats Steen, a young Norwegian man with Duchenne muscular dystrophy, who built a meaningful life through the popular game World of Warcraft.
The digital world is sometimes criticized for being a “shallow escape” from real life. However, for many it can be a reliable source of meaning, connection, and purpose—especially for those who may find it difficult to fulfill certain needs and values in their regular daily lives.
The Remarkable Life of Ibelin
The 2024 documentary The Remarkable Life of Ibelin is an insightful and heartfelt story on how people find real meaning, connection, and purpose through online gaming and virtual worlds.
Mats Steen, a young Norwegian man living with Duchenne muscular dystrophy, found freedom and fulfillment through his digital persona, Ibelin, in the popular video game World of Warcraft. Mats’ physical limitations were significant, but in Azeroth, he experienced life without barriers.
His parents only discovered the extent of his online relationships after his death, realizing that the world they thought was isolating had actually given Mats purpose and belonging. For eight years, Mats was an active member of the Starlight community, a guild within World of Warcraft that became like a family to him. Every evening, Mats would log in to talk, roleplay, and have fun with dozens of online friends. Throughout those years, he dedicated over 20,000 hours to the game and participated in conversations that filled more than 42,000 pages of chat logs.
The documentary used these chat logs to recreate Ibelin’s life within the game, including sentimental and meaningful moments with his online friends Rumour and Reike. Viewers get to witness, through these virtual interactions, how Mats / Ibelin found a place where he was valued not for his physical abilities, but for his personality, humor, and kindness.
Through this digital world, Mats was able to find a sense of purpose and belonging. As he says in the documentary, “Games are my sanctuary. I am safe here, feel valued and respected.”
Finding Love and Romantic Fulfillment in Virtual Space
Due to his physical condition, Mats struggled to find love and romance at school or among real life friends. However, through his virtual avatar Ibelin in the game, Mats was able to experience rare moments of romantic connection that he never thought possible. For once, he was able to connect with people just based on who they are on the inside; as Mats observed, “Everyone looks good in this world, so looks don’t matter, it’s about personality.”
In World of Warcraft, Mats formed a romantic bond with a player known as Rumour. Their connection began with playful moments, like when Rumour stole his hat “just to see what happens,” and gradually grew into a deeper and more significant connection over time. One of the most memorable moments was their virtual kiss, which Mats described as, “The closest thing I’ve ever been to a crush my entire life.” Mats would give her digital gifts and flowers, and she reciprocated by drawing a real-life picture of their characters embracing—a gift Mats would hang in his room.
Real-World Emotional Bonds
These digital connections often spilled over into real lives and deep emotional bonds.
One day, Rumour mysteriously disappeared from the game and stopped playing. Mats only later found out that her parents had taken her computer away due to her poor grades. This sudden disconnect deeply affected Rumour, whose real name was Lisette, and she began struggling with depression because she could no longer connect with her online friends. Mats, finding out about her pain, wrote a heartfelt letter to her parents, pleading with them to return her computer and emphasizing the value of the relationships she had formed in the digital world. His support helped Lisette during one of the most challenging periods she faced, showing how genuine and meaningful digital bonds can be, even outside of virtual spaces.
Another one of his gaming friends, Xenia, known as Reike in the game, struggled to connect with her autistic son. Mats encouraged her to try gaming as a way to bridge the gap, and through World of Warcraft, Xenia was able to find new ways to communicate and bond with her son, including giving each other “virtual hugs,” which was a big deal because her son struggled with human touch in the real world. Xenia also said that her son could now share things with her that he normally couldn’t in person or face-to-face, improving their overall ability to communicate and connect through the shared experience of video games.
These are just a couple examples of how Mats’ digital relationships had significant, positive effects on the real lives of those around him, illustrating the powerful potential of online communities to bring about meaningful change.
Opening Up About His Condition
Mats took a long time to open up about his physical condition to the other members of Starlight. Feeling completely protected behind his virtual persona, Mats could ignore his material reality and didn’t have to worry about people showing him superficial pity or sympathy because of his illness.
This hesitation to open up and be vulnerable unfortunately led to some missed opportunities, including missed phone calls and video chats with his online friends. And during a real-life meetup and party for all the members of Starlight, Mats ended up being one of the few to not attend.
Despite his fears of vulnerability, Mats eventually found the courage to open up as his illness progressed. He shared his fears of dying without meaning anything to anyone with Reike/Xenia, who reminded him of the profound impact he had made on her life and her son’s life. She then listed all the other people he had positively influenced, proving just how meaningful his presence had been over the years.
Ibelin’s Funeral and Legacy
After Mats’ death, the emotional weight of his digital connections became evident. When his parents announced his death on his blog, there was an outpouring of emails filled with love, sympathy, and support for Mats / Ibelin and his family. One email read, “What mattered to Mats was being able to spread joy in our lives. And stuff I learned from his example has changed the way I think about life. I hope that wherever he is, he knows that he’s remembered and treasured, and smiling right now.” Five of his online friends from multiple different countries attended his funeral, showing how deeply these connections extended outside of the virtual world. The Starlight community also organized their own virtual funeral for Ibelin, which has now become an annual tradition to honor his memory.
Studies Supporting the Value of Online Gaming
A well-known study (PDF) by Nick Yee (2006) identified three primary motivations for playing MMORPGs (Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Games), such as World of Warcraft. Each of these motivations can be seen in Mats’ experience as Ibelin:
Achievement: The drive to accomplish goals, gain recognition, and feel a sense of success. Mats fulfilled important roles within the game, like his ‘investigator job,’ which gave him a sense of duty and made him feel valued and respected as a member of the Starlight team.
Social Interaction: The desire to connect, build relationships, and be part of a community. Mats was an active member of the Starlight community, where he built meaningful friendships both online and offline, including his connections with Reike (Xenia) and Rumour (Lisette).
Immersion: The desire to lose oneself in a fantasy world and experience life through a completely new perspective. Mats immersed himself in his avatar Ibelin and the virtual world of Azeroth, finding freedom from his chronic illness and experiencing life in a way that was uniquely empowering and uplifting.
In another related study published in Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, researchers found that players often experience deep social connections within their gaming communities which can help alleviate feelings of loneliness and isolation, especially for those who struggle with social anxiety or shyness. And a study in Computers in Human Behavior indicated that the collaborative nature of online games encourages many pro-social attributes such as improved communication, trust, and shared purpose.
All of these elements are evident in Mats’ story, where his participation in the Starlight community gave him a valued role within a group and elevated his sense of identity and self-worth – all of which are important pillars in building a meaningful life. For individuals facing challenges like physical disabilities or social anxiety, online games can provide an accessible way to fulfill essential psychological needs that may be harder to meet in the physical world.
Feeling Like You Made a Difference Somewhere
One of the most meaningful aspects of Mats’ journey as Ibelin was his desire to make a difference in the lives of others. Despite his fears of dying without leaving a mark, Mats’ impact was undeniable. Through his friendships with Rumour, Reike, and others, he provided emotional support, created lasting memories, and changed lives for the better. His story reminds us that feeling like we have made a difference — whether in the physical or digital world —is a fundamental human need that gives life purpose.
The annual virtual memorials held by the Starlight community, the heartfelt emails his parents received, and the international attendance at his funeral are all powerful symbols of the difference Mats made. His story shows that creating a positive impact on others isn’t just about physical presence, but ultimately the energy you give to others.
Conclusion
The Remarkable Life of Ibelin invites us to reconsider how we view digital spaces and the potential they hold for providing meaning, connection, and purpose. The emotional weight of Mats’ story moved me deeply—I’ll admit that by the end of the documentary I was tearing up a little bit, but that shows how powerful “just digital” relationships can be and how inseparable they are from our broader reality. For Mats Steen, World of Warcraft was more than just a game—it was a lifeline, a place where he could be a stronger and more confident version of himself, find love and romantic connection, and support his friends in a real and tangible way. His story is a powerful reminder that behind every avatar is a real person, and that the connections we form online can be just as enriching and life-changing as those we form in the physical world.
If you’re looking for more insightful documentaries, check out my recommended list of documentaries here.
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We think everyone with an internet connection knows about Beth Reekles. You may know her from books like The Reunion and Love, Locked Down. And, of course, she’s the bestselling author of The Kissing Booth! Sound familiar yet?
Love & Lattes is Beth Reekles’ new YA rom-com, also known as Sincerely Yours, Anna Sherwood in the UK! It follows Annalise Sherwood, a college student about to start a prestigious summer internship in London. But things go awry when she unknowingly kisses the son of the company CEO only nights before she starts interning.
We’ve made Love & Lattes our latest obsession, and we don’t regret it! Here are three things we love about Love & Lattes by Beth Reekles.
Image Source: Penguin Random House
Book Overview: Love & Lattes
Content Warnings: deceased parent, mention of postpartum depression, divorce
Summary: Annalise Sherwood has worked herself to the bone to get a place in a prestigious internship program, and nothing will stop her now. Work hard, play later, that’s her motto. She figures one night letting her guard down won’t hurt, though – especially when it ends with the best kiss of her life.
But to Anna’s horror, she discovers that the mystery guy she kissed that night is none other than Lloyd, the company CEO’s son. Born with a silver spoon in his mouth, he’s everyone’s favorite guy and a total charmer, swanning around like he owns the place. And from the moment they meet again, he rubs Anna up the wrong way.
As the summer and the internship wane, Lloyd seems to be finding any excuse to annoy Anna, and she’s not afraid to return it to him. But when a lot of late-night work brings them unexpectedly closer, she wonders if there’s more to him than she initially thought.
The Romance
We wouldn’t be writing a proper book review of Love & Lattes without highlighting Anna and Lloyd’s push-pull romance! An intern dating the boss’s son is already enough of a scandal on its own. But no matter how hard Anna tries, she keeps letting her guard down around Lloyd. And Lloyd somehow gets Anna to open up about secrets she’s never told anyone else. Everything would be easier for our main characters if they could be honest about their feelings, but there’d be no plot and no fighting for love!
Lloyd’s Charm
Anna is so much stronger than us because we wouldn’t have been able to reject Lloyd as many times as she did in Love & Lattes. She has to put her career first, of course. Her professional reputation would be ruined if people started to think that she was using Lloyd to move up the corporate ladder. But Lloyd’s personality makes us fold every single time! He’s considerate, funny, and charismatic. He asks the right questions and wears his heart on his sleeve. Lloyd communicates so well and knows his self-worth. (Pop off, king!)
The Supporting Cast
Finally, we love Love & Lattes for its supporting characters. The other interns in Anna’s cohort are the types of friends we need in our lives. They invite you everywhere even though you have a busy schedule. They look after everyone who’s been drinking, which happens almost every weekend. And when someone tries to blackmail you and blast your personal life for the office to see, they help you clean up the mess. Monty, Dylan, and Elaine are just the realest.
With a delightful will-they-won’t-they romance and a lovely supporting cast, we fell head over heels for Beth Reekles’ Love & Lattes!
Love & Lattes by Beth Reekles comes out on October 22nd, and you can preorder a copy of it today!
What do you think about Love & Lattes? Are you excited about Beth Reekles’ latest novel? Let us know on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram!
Los Temerarios “Hasta Siempre” Farewell Tour Toyota Center October 10, 2024
Mexican music is normally categorized as lively, jovial, and loud, with brass horns and drums that practically force you to dance. But beyond the cumbias and rancheras that we adore, there will always be ballads that bring us down to Earth. Songs about love, lust, and heartbreak uplift our spirits when we are in love, and console us when that love has been shattered into a million little pieces.
The absolute masters of the romantic ballad are Los Temerarios, a band from Zacatecas, Mexico that was formed in the late 1970s, and enjoyed four decades of heart-wrenching hits. They are in the middle of their farewell tour across the US, Mexico, and Latin America at the moment, and will finalize this long goodbye in Mexico City later this year.
The music of Los Temerarios was never at the top of my list of records I purchased or music that I played around the house, but somehow it has always been part of my life. This was music that my tias listened to while they were cooking, and it would be blasting from the radio when my tios were on the grill. I remember my mother singing along to their songs as she listened to Spanish language radio station La Tremenda 1010AM as she cleaned the house and got ready for work.
Brothers Adolfo Angel and Gustavo Angel are masters of the romantic ballad, pulling on heart strings and providing the soundtrack of love for their adoring fans.
Photo by Marco Torres
Thursday evening was the band’s first for three sold-out concerts at Toyota Center, which is really impressive for any performer, let alone a Mexican act. As the audience filled into the arena, you could feel the anticipation in the air. Once the Angel brothers took to the stage, they were met with a grand applause, leading into the first song of the night, “Enamorado De Ti.”
Most of the band’s tracks are slow to medium in tempo, full of melodic notes from the keyboards, soft guitar chords, and driven drum breaks between the verses. I must admit, I haven’t listened to a Temerarios song for a very long time, but somehow those lyrics and melodies that were buried deep in my memory found their way to my mouth. I caught myself singing songs that I haven’t heard in 20-plus years, and enjoying every moment.
The audience was equally mesmerized, also singing along loudly to each track while they held their dates close and danced in their seats. The opening set continued with “Tu Infame Engaño,” “Una Tarde Fue” and “Como Te Recuerdo.”
The word “temerario” translates as “a reckless person” as well as “fearless” and “daredevil.” Their band logo and some of their album covers prominently feature a wolf, which is a symbol of both masculinity and beauty. Machismo will always be part of the Latin American male ego, but there’s no shame in being in love and sharing your feelings. Los Temerarios have provided the soundtrack of love for their adoring fans for as long as I can remember.
Gustavo Angel’s distinct voice and guitar has accompanied generations of fans through love and heartbreak.
Photo by Marco Torres
The brothers explained to the audience that this show was particularly special because their mother, wives, and other close friends and family were in attendance near the front row. They each blew kisses towards their mom, and took turns serenading her and mouthing the words “Te Quiero Mucho” throughout the evening (I love you!).
The set list included 30 songs and the show went on until around 11pm. One of my favorite moments of the evening was when they sang a cover of “Qué De Raro Tiene” by Vicente Fernandez. The crowd sang most of the night fairly loudly, but they pushed those vocal chords to the max during this song.
Adolfo Angel is the force behind the melodies and lyrics for the innumerable hits by Mexican band Los Temerarios.
Photo by Marco Torres
The encore included the hits “Te Quiero,” “Mi Vida Eres Tú,” and “La Mujer De Los Dos.” A sea of cell phone lights illuminated the arena during this time, and everyone swayed back and forth, shining their light brightly as a “Thank You” to this amazing band for the litany of hits and years of love and support through our highs and lows.
If you’re a hopeless romantic or married to one, you should definitely incorporate romantic letters in your marriage. They are perceived as sweet gestures and help you better express your feelings. If you’re wondering, “How do I write a heart-touching love letter to my wife?” Don’t worry. To inspire you and help you understand how to write a love letter for her, we’ve compiled some love letter ideas.
How Do I Write The Perfect Love Letter To My Wife? 35 Samples To Inspire You
Before we get to the love letter examples, let us quickly answer some of the questions that may be popping up in your mind about how to write a love letter:
If you’re not sure how to start a love letter, start by calling her a endearing name, such as love or darling to set a romantic tone
What to write in a love letter for her? Anything! Write about a cherished memory you have with her, or tell her how she makes your life better, or just fill the page with compliments. As long as the feelings are genuine, your wife would love it
Writing a love letter
Now that you’ve a basic idea about how to write romantic letters, here are some examples to help you further:
Heart touching love letter to my wife
In a marriage, it’s important to show appreciation to each other from time to time. You may think, “I love my wife, and she knows it, why say it again and again?” but you’d be incredibly wrong. Efforts and loving gestures are what keep a relationship strong. Love letters are one of those gestures that help you express your love to your wife and make her feel appreciated.
Again, if you are not a romantic, you may say, “I don’t know how to write a heart-touching love letter to my wife.” And that’s valid. Not all of us are good with words. So, here are some love letter examples to help you understand what to write in a love letter:
Heart touching love letter to wife
1. An angel sent from heaven
Dearest,
Trust me when I say that you are an angel sent from heaven. Our marriage has been filled with its twists and turns and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am grateful to you for showering me with love and for everything that you do for me. I promise to love you forever and stand by your side as you do for me.
Your loving husband
2. You’re my strength
Sweetheart,
You always know how to make me smile when I am down. You have been my strength in the toughest of times and I am so grateful to have you. I hope to spend my entire life with you. I’ll keep on loving you till my last breath.
Words are not enough to express my feelings for you. You’re beautiful and kind and intelligent and interesting and so much more. You are one in a million and how lucky I have been to have you by my side. You are not only my wife but also my best friend. I’d be lost without you.
Lots of love,
4. Richard Burton to Elizabeth Taylor (1964)
My blind eyes are desperately waiting for the sight of you. You don’t realise of course, E.B., how fascinatingly beautiful you have always been, and how strangely you have acquired an added and special and dangerous loveliness.
5. I may not be perfect but I will always try to be perfect for you
Dear [Her name],
I am not the most handsome husband, nor am I a perfect man. But you have always treated me like there’s no one better out there. Your constant support has inspired me to be a better partner everyday and I hope I have succeeded in giving you a happy and fulfilling life. Because your smile is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and I wish to see it forever.
Letter to my wife during hard times
An important part of marriage is to support and stand with each other during ups and downs. And if your wife has had your back in tough times, she deserves some appreciation, right? if you are thinking, “I want to write a love letter to my wife during hard times to express how much I value her, but I can’t think of any romantic words for my wife,” we can help you out with that. Here are some love letter ideas that say “I love my wife”:
Letter to the wife during hard times
6. You are my light in the darkest days
My sunshine,
Thank you for never leaving my side even in the darkest days. Life wouldn’t have been the same without you. I am sorry for the hard times we’re going through right now. But I promise we’ll make it through as long as we are together. I promise to give you everything you deserve and more.
I love you,
7. You’re my safe space
Love,
You are my world. I feel blessed to have married such a kind, empathetic, and courageous person. You’ve made my life a thousand times better and brought me peace like I had never known before. Thank you for being my safe space and loving me when I couldn’t love myself. I love you.
Your beauty had bewitched my body and soul long before. But your kindness is what keeps me going and makes me fall for you everyday. You are my dream woman, and as long as I have you, I can face every challenge with ease.
Lucky to have you,
9. Grateful to have found you
My sweet wife,
Your intelligence and calmness amazes me. You inspire me to keep a positive outlook in life even when there’s a lot to worry about. Your companionship helps me overcome the challenges life throws at me. I am grateful to you for always standing by me.
Before meeting you, I thought love only included butterflies, gifts, kisses, and sex. But throughout the years we’ve spent together, you’ve made me realize love is much more than that. Love is providing support, a shoulder to cry, and a listening ear. It’s holding each other’s hands when the world seems against you. You remind me everyday, now more than ever as we go through these tough times, what true love is supposed to feel like. Thank you for loving me. I promise to love you back ten times more and give you everything you deserve.
Your partner in life,
Anniversary letter to wife
No matter how many years it has been, an anniversary should be a well celebrated occasion. In fact, the more years the better. An anniversary letter to wife is a perfect idea to incorporate in your anniversary celebration to set the mood for the day. You can fill the letter with compliments to make her blush or make it one of those sentimental love letters for her that make her cry. Here are some examples you can take inspiration from when writing a love letter for her:
Anniversary letter for wife
11. Cherishing the beautiful moments
My darling wife,
I vividly remember the moment we met. And the moment we said “I love you”. And the moment you said yes. And the moment we said ”I do”. I cherish these magical moments everyday and want to keep making more beautiful moments with you all my life. Happy 10th year anniversary love. Here’s to celebrating many more.
Your slightly annoying but mostly handsome husband
12. First anniversary
Dear wifey,
I can’t believe it’s been a year already. It feels like only yesterday that you walked the aisle in that mesmerizing white dress and we said our wedding vows. I hope I have made you a happy wife because you sure have made me the happiest man in the world. I promise to keep our love anew forever.
Do you remember how our first meeting was actually an argument in the grocery store? Oh how destiny works. That silly argument has led to 25 amazing years of my life and I have you to thank you for it. And I am sure there is a lot more fun in the store for us. Happy anniversary!
Your loving husband
14. A trip down the memory lane
My sweet darling,
As we celebrate another year of our journey together, I want to let you know how blessed I feel to have you as my wife. I knew we were meant to be the moment we met and it proves. I remember you in your red dress, a cocktail in hand, laughing with your friends. I fell for you then and there and continue to fall for you everyday. Thank you for choosing to spend your life with me. Happy anniversary!
Another year gone by filled with love and beautiful memories. Everyday spent with you is filled with laughter and happiness. You truly are my soulmate and I am excited to spend many more anniversaries with you. Happy wedding anniversary love.
Forever and always,
[Your Name]
Deep love letter for wife
It’s easy to start taking your spouse for granted when you are in a marriage. You fall into a monotonous routine and stop noticing all their amazing qualities or at least, stop appreciating them. If this resonates with you, writing a deep love letter for wife is a great way to break this routine and make her feel special. Once you have decided, “I want to write a heart-touching love letter to my wife,” Finding the right words is not that difficult. Here are some love letter ideas to help you understand how to start a love letter:
Deep love letter for wife
16. You’ve made me the luckiest man
Dear ,
You are my favorite person and I am writing this letter to let you know how much I cherish your presence in my life. Thank you for choosing me as your husband and making me the luckiest man in the world. If not for you, I wouldn’t know what true love means. You mean the world to me.
Thank you,
17. You’re my constant through the ups and downs
My lady,
Your loyalty and support for our relationship makes me feel like a king. Your maturity and sense of contentment in tough times, even when I do not measure up to your expectations, have helped me very much in facing the challenges. My heart swells with love everytime I realize what a lovely queen I have for a wife. I love you.
When I saw you the first time, I had butterflies in my stomach. And they are still there everytime you show up in your favorite red dress or those snuggly purple PJs. No matter the outfit, you are always beautiful, and with every passing moment, I fall for you more.
Your hubby
19. If forever is real, I want to spend it with only you
My dearest wife,
You have made me a happier person. I will always remember how you supported me during hard times and loved me even when I couldn’t fulfill all your expectations. Now that we’re at a better place, it is because of you, and I’ll treat you like the princess that you are. I don’t know if forever is real, but if it is, I want to spend it with you.
You’ve been by my side in happy and sad times. You know how to handle my mood swings and rants. You’ve provided me with a space to be my authentic self and I can’t thank you enough for that. You’re surely my better half. I love you.
Your life partner,
Love letter to my future wife
Ah! The golden period between the proposal and actually being married — when you are not girlfriend/boyfriend but fiances. The engagement period is full of excitement and romance, and a lot of wedding planning. And if you’re an old school romantic, you must’ve thought among this chaos, “I should write a love letter to my future wife.” And you thought right. Writing a love letter for her is always a great idea but it is especially more romantic in this period.Doesn’t matter if it one of the emotional love letters for her that make her cry or a cheesy one, it will become a souvenir she will want to carry forever. Check out these love letter ideas for inspiration:
Love letter to future wife
21. We’ll grow together
To my soon-to-be-wife,
I felt like the luckiest man alive when you said yes. You’ve no idea how excited I am to spend my life with you! I promise that I’ll always support your dreams and goals. I hope we’ll stand together in this journey called life and help each other grow. Thank you for choosing me.
Waiting eagerly to be your husband,
22. I promise to be there for you
My dearest future wife,
I want you to know that I love and cherish every part of your personality – your strengths, weaknesses, and all the quirks. I promise to stand by you as a companion and friend, even through ups and downs. I promise to be the best husband for you.
I can’t believe it’s only a month till we get married and I get to call you my wife. But before that, let me promise you this. I know only love isn’t enough to keep a marriage going. So I assure you that I will treat you with utmost respect and care. And we’ll enter this marriage as equal partners.
24. You’re my love at first sight
Dear ,
It was you that made me believe in love at first sight. I’ve always been cynical about love, until I met you and suddenly the flowers and chocolates and letters and songs all made sense. You’ve changed me for the better and I hope to spend the rest of my life with you.
I am so excited for the wedding, so excited to see you in that white dress walking down the aisle, looking like an angel. But more than that, I am excited to grow old together, create all the fun and mundane and silly memories with you. I can see us slow dancing in the living room or singing together loudly to our favorite song. I am so very excited to be husband and wife and I know you are too. I love you my queen.
With all my heart,
Your future husband.
Beautiful apology letter to wife
Is your wife upset with you? Maybe you forgot the anniversary or said something that hurt her. Whatever the reason may be, writing a beautiful apology letter to wife is an effective way to make it up to her. It gives you a way to explain yourself, show remorse for your actions and appreciate her, and of course, an old school letter is more likely to melt her heart. Check out these examples of apology letters:
Beautiful apology letter to wife
26. The silent treatment is torture
Hi love,
You’re my world and I get lost without you. I miss your smile and your sweet voice, it’s music to my ears. I messed up and I am sorry. Please talk to me.
Your stupid husband
27. To make up after a fight
Honey,
I regret everything I said. I lost my temper and ended up hurting you. I am so sorry for my thoughtless actions. I love you, please let me make it up to you.
I am sorry for the pain I caused you. You’re right, I am an idiot. Can this idiot get another chance? I promise to make things right again. Please accept my apologies, love.
Yours and only yours,
29. A promise to be better
Sweetheart,
I know you don’t want to talk to me right now but please read this to the end. I am sorry for not being there when you needed me. You’re always by my side to support me and it’s unfair that I prioritized other things over you. Your anger is completely valid. But I want to be a better husband to you. Can you give me a chance to prove myself, please? I love you so much.
Only yours,
30. I am sorry for hurting you
Sweetheart,
You are my whole life, I am nothing without you. I regret my actions so much, I am sorry for not being the perfect husband that you deserve. Please forgive me. I promise this won’t happen ever again.
Want to stay forever yours,
Birthday letter to wife
Is your wife’s birthday coming up? Then you must be brainstorming birthday gifts right now. “What if I write a heart-touching love letter to my wife as a gift?” If this thought has occurred to you, you are right, a letter makes a great gift. Alternatively, you buy her something and pair it with the letter to add a personal touch. Here are examples of birthday letter to wife:
Birthday letter to wife
31. When she’s beautiful inside out
To the birthday girl,
If you could see yourself from my eyes, you’d see how beautiful you actually are. But that’s not it, your kind heart and your intelligence add so much to your beauty. I am grateful to have such a perfect wife, Happy birthday, love.
Forever yours,
32. When life turns into a fairytale
My sweet wife,
The day you came into my life, everything became more joyous. The flowers are more colorful, the air carries a scent and the trees look greener. You’ve turned my life into a fairytale where everyday is magical. Happy birthday, my magical queen!
33. Johnny Cash’s letter to June Carter Cash (!994)
Happy Birthday Princess,
We get old and get used to each other. We think alike.
We read each other’s minds. We know what the other wants without asking. Sometimes we irritate each other a little bit. Maybe sometimes take each other for granted.
But once in awhile, like today, I meditate on it and realize how lucky I am to share my life with the greatest woman I ever met. You still fascinate and inspire me.
You influence me for the better. You’re the object of my desire, the #1 Earthly reason for my existence. I love you very much.
Happy Birthday Princess.
John
34. A token of love
Darling,
I wish I could express with words the joy I feel waking up to your smile. I admire the way you show appreciation for the little things in life. On your special day, I promise to shower you with all the love and care you deserve. A very happy birthday!
With lots of love,
35. A dream come true
My love,
Every second I get to spend with you feels like a blessing. I don’t know how I managed to find such a perfect life partner. It still feels like a dream sometimes. You’ve brought so much warmth and happiness in my life. I had never known love like this before meeting you. Thank you for choosing me everyday. I’ll make sure to make this day one of the happiest days of your life. Happy birthday, cupcake.
Your dearest hubby
Final Thoughts
Love letters make for great romantic gestures when you want to appreciate your wife and express your love for her. Especially if you’re bad with words, writing down your feelings gives you the time to think and frame your feelings correctly. Write about how she makes your life better, give her personalized compliments, cherish past moments, etc. Even if you borrow the words from elsewhere, make sure to keep the emotions genuine.
Buckle yourselves in for this one, folks! The iconic Sabaa Tahir is back with Heir, her latest fantasy novel and the first book in the Heir duology.
Set in the same world as Sabaa Tahir’s An Ember in the Ashes quartet, Heir takes place 20 years later. It follows the lives of three young characters: a vengeful orphan named Aiz, an outcast and tracker named Sirsha, and the Empire’s Crown Prince Quil. They struggle with power, love, and greed in an adventure that had us on the edge of our seats.
Sabaa Tahir takes our breath away yet again with Heir. Here are three reasons why you should read it as soon as possible!
Image Source: Penguin Random House
Book Overview: Heir
Content Warnings: murder, death, parent death, child deaths, decapitation, warfare, graphic violence, torture (Read at your discretion!)
Summary: An orphan. An outcast. A prince. And a killer who will bring an empire to its knees.
Growing up in the Kegari slums, AIZ has seen her share of suffering. An old tragedy fuels her need for vengeance, but the love of her people propels her until one hotheaded mistake lands her in an inescapable prison, where the embers of her wrath ignite.
Banished from her people for an unforgivable crime, SIRSHA is a down-on-her-luck tracker who uses magic to trace her marks. Destitute, she agrees to hunt down a killer who has murdered children across the Martial Empire. All she has to do is carry out the job and get paid. But when a chance encounter leads to an unexpected attraction, Sirsha learns her mission might cost her far more than she’s willing to give up.
QUIL is the crown prince of the Empire and nephew of a venerated empress, but he’s loath to take the throne when his aunt steps down. As the son of a reviled emperor, he, better than anyone, understands that power corrupts. When a vicious new enemy threatens the survival of the Empire, Quil must ask himself if he can rise above his tragic lineage and be the heir his people need.
It’s So Immersive
Maybe it’s because we both read Heir and listened to its audiobook, but we were locked in! This fantasy world is everything, from the physical and political landscape to each character’s dark history. Aiz sails across the Southern Ocean and back to rule her people in the name of Mother Div. Sirsha races across sea and land in the hopes of tracking a killer. Meanwhile, Quil is forced out of his palace in search of safety. We fully lost ourselves in this story and even had to reread the ending to cope.
The Intersection Of Characters
With three alternating points of view, it can be difficult to keep track of the plot while learning the individual backstories. But Heir weaves everyone’s stories together so well. Not to mention those of the beloved characters from An Ember in the Ashes! There’s a point in the novel where we must stop and think, is this all happening simultaneously? (IYKYK) But once we figured out the twist, everything else came together. Aiz, Sirsha, and Quil all play their destined role in the final battle, and we’re interested in seeing the aftermath in the sequel.
Of Course, The Romance
We couldn’t write this review without mentioning the romance between Sirsha and Quil! From their first chance encounter to bantering while traveling together, we absolutely loved seeing their chemistry develop. Because who else would get fake engaged and bonded to someone just to save her from her sister’s wrath? Soulmates, that’s who! Honestly, that is one of the most romantic moments we’ve ever seen in a romantasy, and we’re not afraid to admit it. Here’s hoping Sirsha and Quil get their happily ever after!
Sabaa Tahir reimagines a familiar world in Heir, a captivating tale with dark schemes, magic, and twists up until the final page!
Heir by Sabaa Tahir will be released on October 1st, and you can preorder a copy of it here!
What do you think about Sabaa Tahir’s Heir? Are you looking forward to this new duology? Let us know on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram!
Texting etiquette is a good skill to have in today’s dating culture. Dry texting has become a common turn off. So if you are trying to impress your tinder match or keep the spark alive in your relationship, learn to write romantic text messages that will make her want you badly.
You can write short sweet texts or long text messages that will make her want you. It doesn’t have to be as fancy as, “Shall I compare thee to a summer day”; not all of us are Shakespeare. So whether you are looking for deep love messages for her or texts to make her think about you, here is a curated list to help you out.
200 Romantic Text Messages That Will Make Her Want You Badly
Not quite brushed up on your dating texting skills?? Don’t worry, we can help you come up with words to describe someone you love. Here are some examples to inspire you.
Texts to make her think about you
Want to be on your girl’s mind 24×7? Messages are a great way to make her miss you, especially if you’re in a long-distance relationship. Here are some examples of texts to make her think about you:
Text to make her think about you
I love when I catch you looking at me.
My heart races when I see you.
You are my happily ever after.
If loving you was a job, I’d be the most dedicated candidate. I’d even work for free!
You know what would be perfect right now? Cuddling with you.
Every moment without you feels like forever.
I can’t wait to come home to your beautiful face every night.
You make me breathless.
Every time you touch me, electricity runs through my veins.
I can’t explain the way you make me feel when I hear your voice or see your face, but I adore it.
I love the way you look at me. It makes me feel like I am the most important person in your life.
Now I understand what all those love songs and sappy poems are about
The day I met you, God fulfilled my prayers
You are the only person I want to come home to
I hope to spend all my tomorrows chasing your perfect smile
Thank you for letting me be myself
I still get astonished by your enamoring beauty
Just one message from you is enough to brighten my whole day
I want the kind of relationship where people look at us and say, I want what they have
Nothing makes me happier than your presence
This is what they mean when they say, “meant to be.”
24. Nothing in the world is so important to me than you 25. I get the best curve on my face whenever I look at you 26. I never get tired of thinking about you because that is my favorite hobby. You make my heart beat faster, and I love that feeling 27. I have a longing to make you the princess of my world. Would you like to accept this prince? 28. You are the queen of my heart. I owe my smile and happiness to you 29. The greatest feeling in life is holding you closer. Girl, I need you 30. For others, you may be one person, but for me, you are the world 31. Do you know magic? Because I can see you everywhere 32. I am thankful for the moment when I welcomed you into my life 33. What on earth did I think about all the time before you? 34. Next time I hug you, I probably won’t let go for a long time 35. With you, time stands still. Every moment spent with you feels like an eternity of joy 36. The world may be chaotic, but in your arms, I find solace 37. In your smile, I find the strength to overcome any obstacle 38. You are the most incredible person I know, and I’m grateful to have you in my life 39. With you, each day is a new adventure 40. When I am with you, I feel like the luckiest person in the world
Deep love messages for her
Deep love message for her
No matter how long you’ve been in a relationship or married with a girl, she’d always appreciate a love note or message expressing your love for her. Here are some examples of deep love messages for her:
41. You are my best friend and my soulmate—I can’t imagine my life without you. 42. I can’t describe in words how much our little moments matter to me. 43. Everytime I think I can’t possibly love you any more than I already do, you prove me wrong. 44. Every day I continue to choose you, and every day that choice gets easier. 45. You’re the reason I wake up every morning. 46. In a crowd of people, my eyes always look for you. 47. You are the greatest gift the universe has given me 48. I want to grow old with you. 49. Your beauty, intelligence and kindness make me fall in love with you every day! 50. Loving you is the best thing that happened to me 51. You wanna know who I’m in love with? Read the first word again ❤ 52. The more years go by, the more I learn new things to love about you. You are the most amazing woman to me. 53. I’m a movement by myself, but I’m a force when we’re together 54. Every day of ours feels just like the very first day because I cannot help falling in love with you over and over again 55. I am beyond lucky to have fallen in love with my best friend 56. I love you a little more every single day 57. You are my first and only love 58. Loving you is the best thing I have ever done. And I will never regret it 59. Your heart is so full of love, and I’m lucky enough to find a place there 60. I love that you see all of me and love me anyway
61. My love for you is indescribable 62. You changed my world the day I met you and I have never looked back since 63. Knowing that you love me as much as I love you is the best feeling in the world 64. You are the muse behind all my thoughts and the melody of my heart’s rhythm 65. You are my biggest cheerleader 66. The thought of you warms my heart even during the cold winters 67. You are the only reason behind my every heartbeat 68. Your love is a gentle, soothing breeze that refreshes my soul on a stuffy, humid day. 69. You are on my mind every hour, every minute, and every second of the day 70. My happiness begins with you and ends with you 71. I start my day with you and end it with you. I am lucky to call you mine 72. Our bond is strengthened by God’s blessings and transcends beyond boundaries 73. You are the angel of my life. The day I met you, my life became brighter and happier 74. You are the reason for my happiness, the center of my life, and the whole of my heart 75. You are the light of my dark world. Whenever I fall into darkness, your light brings me out 76. Thank you for always making me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world 77. I love you more than I did yesterday but not more than I will tomorrow 78. You are the reason I believe in love at first sight. From the moment I met you, my heart was yours 79. In your eyes, I found the reflection of my soul. Forever grateful for your love 80. You are the melody that makes my heart sing. Forever grateful to have you in my life
Trust messages to make her fall in love
Romantic text messages play a great part in wooing your girl. If you haven’t exchanged the ‘L’ word yet but want to, here are some trust messages to make her fall in love:
Trust message to make her fall in love
81. If I could wish for one thing in life, I’d wish for you to see yourself through my eyes. Only then would you realize how special you are to me. 82. I hope to be the reason for your beautiful smile every day 83. So far, every moment we’ve spent together has been awesome. But I promise you, that the best is yet to come. 84. Do you have any idea how much I miss you every second of the day that we’re not together? 85. Whenever my phone rings, I hope it’s you. 86. Everytime I get a message from you, I smile at my phone like an idiot. 87. Being with you has made me a better person. Thank you so much for that. 88. I want to make you the happiest woman in the world. 89. Every time we embrace, I feel on top of the world. I love you. 90. Sometimes it feels like I’m dreaming, but then I realize it’s all real. Thank you for being mine! 91. I love you. Whatever comes our way and whatever happens, we’re in this together. 92. No matter how dull my days go, your presence makes everything in my life colorful. 93. When I see myself twenty years down the line, I see you sitting next to me 94. You’re my strength. You’re a woman every man would want by her side 95. You’re not an option. You’re my priority 96. Every moment I spend with you is my favorite 97. I’ve only got eyes for you 98. I am yours, today and always
99. I love to be myself when you are around me because you never judge me 100. There is nothing you could do that could stop me from loving you 101. One day, we will be holding each other’s wrinkled hands and expressing, “we did it.” 102. When I met you, everything made sense 103. Whenever I face a difficult situation, I look at you and it makes me feel better 104. I can climb a thousand mountains to see you smile 105. I found no other love story more magnetic than us. I can tell our story again and again to anyone. I love you, baby 106. I promise to love you till I get wrinkles and my teeth start falling out 107. Your gorgeous eyes have pierced my heart and made me fall for you 108. As long as I am alive, my heart will beat for you 109. I had no idea what it was like to want someone this badly 110. You are the biggest dream that came true for me. You are my everything 111. I have given you my heart, mind, and soul 112. How lucky am I to have fallen in love with my best friend? 113. My life feels complete whenever I see you around 114. I wish to walk with you on the beach, holding hands today and forever 115. I was missing something in my life. I didn’t know it was you until I met you 116. Each moment spent with you is a treasure 117. No matter what life throws at us, I will be by your side. You are the woman for me 118. I love your strength, your courage, your mind 119. You are the only person I want to spend my life with 120. I had given up on love but then you changed everything for me
Long text messages that will make her want you
Not all texts need to be short and sweet. Long romantic messages show that you’ve put in effort to make your girl’s day, and putting in effort is a very attractive trait. Here are some long text messages that will make her want you:
Long text message that will make her want you
121. You are a breath of fresh air and a ray of sunshine in this journey of life. 122. Since the time I’ve met you, my life has become a better place; I laugh a little harder and smile a bit brighter, just because I have you. 123. I can spend an eternity with my arms wrapped around you;I never want to let you go. 124. You are a beautiful person, inside and out. I am so lucky to have you as my partner. 125. If someone were to ask me about my ideal wife, I would just say your name. You have surpassed all my expectations. 126. I have never felt so amazing about any girl before. We have a connection that can’t be described in words. 127. At first glance, I knew you were going to be mine. I thank God every day for making it come true. 128. You make me feel like the most special man on Earth 129. To find love is to find joy, peace and happiness. All these have existed in my life ever since you became my partner. 130. You make every moment a memory that I will cherish forever 131. You’re the first person I want to tell when things go wrong and when they go right 132. Every single morning I thank God for you 133. Just like a boat with no sailor, I feel the same in your absence-—completely lost 134. All you have to do is show up to make my day so much better 135. From the moment we met, I knew you would be mine and I would be yours for the rest of our days 136. We drive each other crazy sometimes, but we always work our way back to each other 137. Meeting you was the event that changed my life forever. I can’t wait to see what our future holds for us 138. We are meant to be together, and I cannot imagine a single moment without you 139. You are the most beautiful flower in my garden. Keep blossoming and keep filling my life with fragrance. 140. I wish I had met you earlier, because life would have been so much more fun. Now that you are with me, I never want to let you go
141. There are seven wonders in this beautiful world. But I’m sure they’ve missed the eighth one — you. 142. Baby, your smile is like the radiance of the sun that can melt any cold stone heart, just like mine. 143. Although the night sky may seem magical, nothing is more magical than you 144. You are my sunrise, and I love you more with every passing day 145. In your arms, I found my world. In your eyes, I found myself 146. Honey, you have captured my mind. From waking up to going to sleep, I keep thinking about you. 147. Holding your hands and hearing your voice makes me feel as though I could live forever 148. You are like a constellation in the night sky. Looking at you fills me with wonder and awe 149. You are an evergreen flower that will never wither 150. You are the missing piece in my puzzle. With you, my heart feels complete and my love knows no bounds 151. You are the missing piece in my puzzle. With you, my heart feels complete and my love knows no bounds 152. My love for you is like a never-ending melody that resonates in my soul. You are my greatest inspiration 153. When you smile at me, I feel like I am flying higher than any bird. When you kiss me, it feels like drowning in a sea of bliss 154. Every time I imagine you close to me, my heart skips a few beats. Your sweet smile, pretty eyes, fragrant hair, everything is beautiful to me 155. There’s just no end to the things I want to do with you. I want to walk with your hand in mine. I want to pull you into a street corner and make out till the taste of your lips sticks on mine. I want to feel your body close to me every night I drift to sleep 156. Every second that you’re close to me, I feel like I am in heaven. Just being in your presence makes me think I can touch the sky 157. There’s no one else I desire but you. You have slowly become my entire universe—the love that defines my existence. Now, my heart is yours forever 158. I find you special because the entire universe conspired to delicately place you in my life 159. A life without you feels like an ocean without water and a body without a brain. I am nothing without you, my darling. 160. You are the first and last thought each day, my sun, moon, and stars rolled into one. I want to be the source of your happiness, my princess
Charming text messages for her
Whether you are in the talking stage, in a relationship, or already married, a cute text is a fool-proof plan to make your girl smile. Here are some examples of charming text messages for her to help you out:
Charming text message for her
161. I realized fairy tales can come true when I found you. 162. Your voice is music to my ears. 163. Only hearing your name is enough to give me butterflies. 164. You’re my paradise. 165. Your smile is the cutest thing in the world. 166. If you were a movie, I’d watch you over and over again. 167. You make my heart melt! 💕 168. They say nothing lasts forever. Can I be your nothing? 169. Whoever said nobody is perfect clearly didn’t meet you. 170. I always wake up smiling. I think it’s your fault. 171. A million kisses to my favorite lady. 172. Just thinking about you puts a smile on my face. 173. You’re cuter than any cat picture 🐈 174. If Van Gogh had you as a subject, the sunflowers didn’t stand a chance🌻🌻🌻 175. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back 😘 176. If I were a stop light 🚦, I would turn red every time you passed by, so that I could stare at you a bit longer. 177. Treat yo’ self… to an evening with me! 178. We go together like peanut butter and jelly 179. You. Me. Chocolate. The perfect love triangle 180. I love you to infinity
181. Missing your beautiful face already 182. You are one in a million, baby 183. You’re the right person for me! 184. You and I are the same kind of strange 185. Our story isn’t a high-tech thriller, but our little narrative has its charms 186. We are cute together 187. If I could, I would send you thousands of kisses over the phone 188. Baby, you have the purest soul I have ever met 189. Thinking of you and smiling 190. The sound of your voice magically makes my day better 191. Just thinking of you makes me smile even on a busy day 192. I need to look for a doctor because when I see you, I lose control over my mind 193. The way you touch me sends shivers down my spine. 194. Nothing in the world is as sweet as you, not even honey 195. Seeing your wallpaper on my phone makes me smile like a fool 196. It is incredibly impossible not to think about you 197. Hey, stop coming into my dreams. Come to my home instead 198. If I were an artist, all my canvases would be filled with your face 199. All I need is you right here 200. You are the embodiment of perfection because I can’t find a single fault in you
If you’ve recently got a girl’s number and are not confident about texting her, don’t worry. Knowing how to write romantic text messages that will make her want you badly takes practice. Here are some tips on how to text a girl.
Tips on how to text a girl
FAQs
1. How can I touch her heart with words?
The key is to be genuine. Whether you use someone else’s quotes or write your own, make sure you mean them. Here are some prompts you can use to compose words to describe someone you love:
Be specific: Compliment her eye color, hairstyle, beauty marks, freckles, etc. Don’t get hung up on appearance only. Show admiration for her humor, intelligence, kindness, etc. Tell her how she adds value to your life. Show how much you cherish her
2. How do I emotionally connect with a girl over text?
Here are some tips:
Be vulnerable Share your personal experiences Have some deep conversations Text frequently, don’t disappear for long periods of time without any notice
3. How do you make a girl feel for you over text?
Be confident Be silly and have fun Use humor Keep your tone positive and enthusiastic; don’t make her feel like it’s a burden to text her
To sum up
Getting a girl’s number is just the beginning. How you text her later plays a great role in determining whether or not she says yes to a relationship. Sprinkle some occasional romantic text messages that will make her want you badly. Even in committed relationships or marriages, texts are a great tool to keep the spark alive. So go ahead, text your lady something sweet and make her smile.
The adult romances this summer have been checking all our boxes! We at THP love to explore rich stories and characters, and today’s no different. We’re excited to review Noué Kirwan’s latest novel, Frequent Fliers.
Frequent Fliers by Noué Kirwan follows Melanie “Lanie” Turner, a woman who somehow becomes the best mate/maid of honor at her cousin Gemma’s wedding. Oh, and Gemma’s marrying Lanie’s lifelong crush Jonah. As Lanie travels between New York City and London to plan the wedding, she repeatedly runs into a handsome, no-nonsense seatmate named Dr. Ridley Aronsen.
Can Lanie make things work with Ridley? Or will they just barely miss the right timing? We won’t keep you waiting too long. Here are three things we love about Frequent Fliers by Noué Kirwan!
Image Source: HarperCollins Publishers
Book Overview: Frequent Fliers
Content Warnings: parental abandonment, parental neglect, anxiety, and panic attacks, mention of partner death, mention of terminal disease, divorce, mention of cheating
Summary:Lanie Turner has some loose ends: – A nearly complete PhD. – A job she basically enjoys. – And a lifelong crush…that she’s almost gotten over.
On a trip to reunite with her family in England—and said crush, Jonah—Lanie intends to take care of one of those items. Her favorite cousin, Gemma, is engaged…to Jonah. And they want Lanie to be both their maid of honor and best “mate” at the wedding. It’s the perfect opportunity to prove the pitying gazes wrong: she’s over Jonah. Really.
As Lanie travels between New York City and London to help with wedding prep, she befriends her handsome seatmate. Dr. Ridley Aronsen—a widower and single father—is prickly at first, but feisty Lanie reminds him of a more carefree time in his life. And after a steamy layover in Iceland, the pair take a direct flight from seatmates to lovers. Ridley even agrees to be her plus-one for the wedding. For once, everything seems to be falling into place.
But Lanie’s used to getting hurt, and Ridley finds opening up difficult. How will a long-distance relationship even work once Lanie’s back in NYC permanently? It’s easy enough to let one more loose thread unravel…after all, life’s problems seem tiny from thirty-five thousand feet in the air.
Tough Conversations
We absolutely love Frequent Fliers for the way it addresses finding love after loss. It’s been almost three years since Ridley lost his wife, Thyra. Then, when he meets Lanie, he hesitates to open up about his family and reveal the truth about his late wife and 14-year-old daughter, Beatrix. But Ridley starts to care for and love Lanie faster than he can tell Bea. And the reality is this: introducing a new partner to his daughter takes a lot more difficult conversations, parenting, and breakdowns than he could’ve expected.
Lanie’s Development
The main character’s development is our next reason for loving Noué Kirwan’s Frequent Fliers. Lanie’s past relationships have taught her not to expect the good in people. She’s gotten used to people finding any reason not to be with her anymore. But Lanie learns that she needs to love and value herself and be the most important person in her life before committing to someone else. Lanie’s romance with Ridley shows that someone loves her enough to stay and find her no matter where she goes.
The Wedding
Are we suckers for big wedding celebrations in books? Yes, and we have no shame in admitting that! Gemma and Jonah’s wedding in Frequent Fliers comes and goes with minimal issues, thanks to Lanie being at the helm. But the whole time, she’s anxiously awaiting Ridley’s response after she confessed her love in a drunken voicemail. We love that the author didn’t skip to the end immediately after the wedding and actually took more time to develop Lanie and Ridley’s relationship and find its true happy ending.
Noué Kirwan’s Frequent Fliers offers us a unique, emotional, and relatable story about showing up for loved ones and finding love after loss.
Frequent Fliers by Noué Kirwan is out August 13th, and you can preorder a copy of it here!
What do you think about Noué Kirwan’s Frequent Fliers? Do you have it on your TBR? Let us know on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram!
Have you ever noticed that when a relationship enters troubled waters, people reminisce about their initial love-struck days? “He was such a sweetheart when we started going out. He took such good care of me.” “When we first started going out, she was so thoughtful and caring. Wish I could get that version of her back.” In relationship parlance, we call those good old days the honeymoon phase or the cupcake phase. Given how bright and rosy everything seems, it’s only natural to wonder, “How long does the honeymoon phase last?”
Whether you’re on the brink of a new relationship or your current partnership doesn’t feel like the bed of roses it used to be, awareness about what happens when the honeymoon period fades can help you navigate the different stages of falling in love a little better. So, grab your coffee and sit tight as we are about to serve you the whole nine yards of the honeymoon episode with a side of what comes after the honeymoon phase in a relationship.
What Is The Honeymoon Phase Of A Relationship?
The honeymoon phase refers to the very beginning of a new relationship when a couple goes through an ecstatic state of intense passion, love, and physical attraction. In every waking moment, you keep thinking about this special person. You feel so in love you can’t stop smiling involuntarily. The heart races the moment you see them and you lit up like a million fireflies!
It’s that dating phase where you love more fight less; it’s a phase of countless romantic dates and endless conversations. Spending quality time with your bae becomes your top priority. Not to mention sexual sparks fly high in the honeymoon phase of a relationship. You can hardly keep your hands off each other.
During these early days, you both are always on your best behavior. From changing your wardrobe and buying expensive gifts to staying up all night to chat, you can go to any extent to make this person fall for you even more. In the first few months, you look at your new partner through rose-colored glasses of awe and admiration. It leaves you hypnotized by their charm. They can do no wrong, they can’t say a bad thing. Most couples don’t even notice any red flags until they explore the other complicated stages of falling in love.
During the honeymoon phase, you can barely keep your hands off each other
How Long Does The Honeymoon Phase Last?
Now, it’s time to address the elephant in the room – how long is the honeymoon phase in a relationship? More importantly, can the honeymoon phase last forever? Well, as much as you want to hold on to the romantic tête-à-têtes and the passionate sex, the cupcake phase is a fun ride that inevitably comes to an end.
To find an answer to, how long does the honeymoon phase last, you have to understand that this thrill, excitement, the very feeling of ‘being in love’—it’s all a mere outcome of certain chemical reactions in our brain. Let’s explore some research data:
According to a study, the sustenance of romantic love is associated with the activation of dopamine and oxytocin-rich regions of the brain
Another article published in Scientific American talks about a study that reveals how people who have just fallen in love have a higher level of nerve growth factor than those who are single or in long-term relationships. A higher NGF score suggests increased emotions of euphoria and attachment in a person. What’s interesting is that the NGF and cortisol level difference between these two groups receded within 12-24 months
As spoken to Scientific American by Gary W. Lewandowski, Jr., associate professor of psychology at Monmouth University, “These findings suggest that romantic love is an arousing but stressful experience. These physiological changes are short-lived, perhaps because we become acclimated to our partner with time.”
And that’s one of the major reasons the honeymoon period wears off eventually. So, how long is the honeymoon phase in a relationship? That varies from couple to couple as every relationship progresses at its own pace. As rare as it is, some couples might even respond in the affirmative to the question, can the honeymoon phase last forever? That too, after thirty-forty years of their marriage.
Exceptions aside, typically, the honeymoon phase of a relationship can last anywhere from a few weeks to a few months or even up to a year. According to a 2015 study, the honeymoon period can last from six months to almost 2.5 years. But most people can’t manage to keep the spark alive after the very early stages and that’s completely normal. It’s in no way an indication that you’re not in a happy, healthy relationship.
How to recognize that the honeymoon phase is over?
There is no way of predicting how long does the honeymoon phase last. And if you ask us, you shouldn’t keep an eye out for it either. It will only ruin the pure magic of the honeymoon phase of a relationship. For as long as you can love more fight less, and enjoy intense physical intimacy, cherish this blissful spell in your life. However, if you are starting to feel like something’s wrong between you and your bae, it’s probably because the short-and-sweet bubble of the cupcake phase is finally popping. Here are a few signs to recognize that the honeymoon phase is over:
As your rose-tinted glasses come off, you now see your partner in a realistic light which makes their negative traits and annoying habits more prominent
After the dopamine high wanes, ordinary activities like watching a movie together or going for a walk that felt so exhilarating earlier become mundane
During the post-honeymoon phase, you start spotting the relationship red flags which, like it or not, leads to more disagreements and arguments
Your sex life too takes a hit at this dating phase. The blazing physical attraction of the early stages slowly fizzles out
After the infatuation period, you stop pretending to be the pristine souls and be comfortable enough to see each other in your PJs and messy hair or perhaps use a swear word or two in front of them
What Comes After The Honeymoon Phase In A Relationship?
Now that we have a fair idea of how long is the honeymoon phase in a relationship let’s get cracking what comes after the honeymoon phase in a relationship. First, you have to realize that this is just a dating phase, not a parameter of your feelings for each other. The honeymoon phase withering away doesn’t equal falling out of love with your partner.
It’s not the end of the world; you are just transitioning to the next pitstop in the different stages of falling in love. If you are worried about the kind of future you can expect with your partner, let’s walk you through the different junctures of attachment that follow the honeymoon phase of a relationship:
1. Disillusionment
The very next stage you embark upon brings in all kinds of insecurities, uncertainties, and reality checks. Suddenly something starts to feel off in your relationship. Your partner slips from the pedestal you put them on and you see them for who they truly are.
If one partner is too bossy, overly possessive, or emotionally a few steps behind the other, it will induce a power struggle between them. With one person taking charge or being emotionally unavailable, the other partner will question their compatibility, feel insecure about the very foundation of the relationship, and doubt any possibilities of future happiness with each other.
Going through the disillusionment phase is the hardest part for all couples. With the slightest inconvenience, you might feel an urge to end things for good. But we have a few clever tricks for you to weather the storm and come out of it stronger as a couple:
Remember to stand your ground steady while making some space for changes
You need to make a conscious effort to accept the differences and respect your partner’s individuality
Both partners need to be equally on board in this journey to build a healthy relationship
Of course, you should try hard to make it through this stage but never give up on your values and boundaries and compromise on the non-negotiables
2. Attachment
Yes, keeping the spark alive may seem like a daunting task now. But what comes after the honeymoon phase in a relationship is far more rewarding than the sheer thrill of a budding romance. In the attachment stage, you experience emotional connection and vulnerability and get to see each other’s raw, authentic selves. It’s in this stage that both partners start to depend on each other. They build trust and gather unwavering willpower to stick together, no matter the odds.
How to navigate the attachment phase
Your relationship isn’t shatterproof just yet. As you discover each other in a new light, there’s still a lot of wonder, disappointment, grief, and frustration in store for you. New challenges will unlock every other day. The lifespan of your relationship boils down to how you handle all these feelings and work your way up to a committed relationship. Here’s what we suggest:
This is your chance to get to know your partner on a deeper level. So spend time with them as much as possible
Don’t shy away from being vulnerable in front of them
Learn and acknowledge each other’s insecurities, scars, and darkest thoughts. It’s an important building block of a strong emotional bond
Take an interest in what your partner is passionate about. Try to analyze things from their perspective. Flying solo isn’t a sign of healthy relationships. You have to be a team player
Don’t sweep your problems under the rug. For a sustainable partnership, keep a solution-oriented approach to conflict resolution
After the honeymoon phase, you start to see your partner for who they truly are
3. Stable partnership
Do you remember how we started this discussion? Can the honeymoon phase last forever? I think you will agree that as much as we all root for the fairytale love to never fade, this final dating phase is our end goal. After floating through the troubled waters for so long you finally reach a calm, stable state.
No more surprises left; you have nothing to hide from each other. Together you have created a safe nest to nurture your love. You get a sense of comfort and security in each other’s company. Taking a leap with your partner like moving in together or getting engaged seems more feasible at this point. Once again, you love more fight less!
First of all, big applause to you and your partner for making it this far. We can see you are practically inseparable. But love is like a kite that will slip off your grip if you are not paying attention for even a little while. Since we all want a fairytale ending for your relationship, here are a few pointers to strengthen the bond with your partner:
Don’t let your love sink under the grocery bills and office presentations. To keep the spark alive, keep dating each other, spend quality time, bring them flowers, plan surprises, go on vacations
When you become too complacent in a relationship, you tend to take each other for granted. To not turn into that distant, arrogant partner, express your gratitude, tell them how much you love them at least once every day, and always try to be true to your words
Value the commitment you have made toward one another. Without loyalty and transparency, the whole foundation might collapse like a house of cards
For some couples, physical attraction might be scarce after reaching this point. There are plenty of ways to spice things up in the bedroom – off the top of my head, roleplay?
Key Pointers
The honeymoon phase is the very beginning of a relationship when a couple remains hypnotized by each other’s cham without a worry in the world
This phase can last from a few months up to 2.5 years, depending on the couple’s emotional connection and several other factors
After the initial euphoria fades, reality hits in the disillusionment period and two lovers start to notice each other’s quirks and imperfections
As they make it to the attachment phase, a stronger bond develops based on trust and vulnerability
In the final stage, they experience a calm, stable love being fully committed to each other
Final Thoughts
Now that you have the answer to, how long does the honeymoon phase last, Or are you ready to explore the upcoming adventures hand in hand with your sweetheart? Yes, the early stages are easy-going. There’s thrill, eagerness, and an all-consuming magnetic attraction that keep you glued to your partner. And that serves as the foundation of a relationship.
That being said, there’s no need to feel daunted by the probable hardships of the post-honeymoon period. Treat the end of your honeymoon days as a new beginning, full of possibilities. No matter what stage of the relationship you are at, what’s important is that you value each other’s presence in your lives, respect each other’s individuality and keep your love alive for an eternity.
