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Tag: Overcoming trauma

  • This Trauma Doctor Shares How He Deals with Loss and How It Will Change Your Perspective on Failure | Entrepreneur

    This Trauma Doctor Shares How He Deals with Loss and How It Will Change Your Perspective on Failure | Entrepreneur

    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    If you are an emergency room physician, death and the fear of failure are constant companions. A countdown timer starts when a patient arrives with a fatal wound or condition. If that timer reaches zero, the patient will die. If it is prevented from reaching zero, the patient will survive and live to fight another day.

    It is literally a race against the clock, and the role of the ER physician is to battle that timer directly through medical interventions and keep the patient alive long enough for a trauma surgeon, interventional cardiologist or other specialist to solve the issue that is killing them.

    As you might imagine, when the ER staff wins that fight and saves a life, it is a fantastic feeling, but when they fail and lose a patient, it is devastating. Worse yet is when they lose a patient who could have been saved because they either made an error or did not have the required resources to save the person. Every ER Doctor has memories of the patients that they lost. In fact, a requirement for a long and healthy career in emergency medicine is the ability to find peace with this notion.

    I recently had the opportunity to spend time with Dr. Dan Dworkis, a Trauma and ER physician, Professor at the USC Keck School of Medicine, Medical Director of the Mission Critical Teams Institute, Podcast host and the author of The Emergency Mind. Dan has spent his career working in emergency rooms. In fact, not just emergency rooms but a busy trauma center in Los Angeles.

    As you might imagine, Dan has seen it all and, as a result, carries the stories and memories that come with working at a hospital that is frequented by children who have been shot, traumatic car accidents and people with life-threatening injuries and illnesses.

    Dan has spent a big part of his career studying how we make decisions under stress, how to operate in high-stress environments and how to create a culture of continuous improvement. Not surprisingly, I learned a lot from Dan. But, by far, the most profound thing I learned from Dan was a unique way to approach failure and, in the process, open ourselves up to growth and learning.

    Related: The 5 Key Qualities of a Good Leader

    The ritual: Learning by embracing loss

    As you can imagine, trauma physicians see quite a bit of death. No matter how good a doctor you are, you will lose patients, and some of those people certainly could have been saved with different skills or different resources. It would be easy to simply block yourself off from these feelings, to harden your heart, and to put these bad experiences into a mental box that you lock away. While this might not be great for your mental health, it is certainly a seemingly easier thing than confronting these memories and feelings. Yet, Dan actually advocates doing the complete opposite, leaning into the failure and attacking it directly.

    When a patient dies, there is an awkward moment immediately afterward where the team that treated the patient must transition away from that fight and move on to another. Despite just a few minutes before waging a war to save their life, the team must move on from this person. Machines must be turned off, tubes and wires removed, and each team member must emotionally reset and get back to work.

    It would be easy at that point to block the feelings and doubts that arise, place them in a box and move on to the next task while hoping never to think about those feelings again. But that is not what Dan does or advocates. Instead, he engages in a ritual that he was taught as a young doctor, which is to gather the team at the bedside of the patient, place a hand on the deceased patient, and utter the following phrase: “Thank you for teaching me. I am sorry that all I could do for you today was learn.”

    This seemingly simple act and brief statement is more than just a ritual to clear the mind before moving on. Instead, it is a deeply profound approach to situations where we cannot succeed and lays a strong foundation for learning and growth.

    Related: 2 Phrases I Learned From a Senior CIA Officer That Changed My Leadership Style

    Embracing failure

    The first significant thing that this ritual does is acknowledge and embrace failure. Rather than moving on and pretending that something profoundly negative didn’t just happen, this ritual looks failure square in the eye and leans into the discomfort of the situation. It embraces failure and immediately triggers the learning process.

    The first step to growth is the recognition and admission that what we currently do or know is not sufficient. To learn from others, we have to accept our own shortcomings, and this practice opens the door to that and to discovering something better. If we do not admit to our shortcomings, we cannot improve, and this is precisely the point of this ritual.

    Simply look at the phrase, “Thank you for teaching me. I am sorry that all I could do for you today was learn.” By its nature, it says I failed you today, and I wish I had more to give. It doesn’t say, “It’s too bad you died,” or “Wow, rough break you got.” It says, “I am sorry.” It embraces that the team didn’t have enough to save the person (and to be fair, no one may have been able to save them), but simply that acknowledgment doesn’t go far enough. Rather, it says I “learned from you.” It implicitly says, “I will be better next time” and “I am growing and improving my skills.” It is active, not passive, and immediately takes the first step toward learning.

    Conclusion

    A profound lesson extends far beyond the medical field and this single ritual to all of us. Whether you are an entrepreneur, a business leader, or even a parent, creating a culture of learning from mistakes and continuous improvement is critical to getting better. We should never run from our errors or try to hide them. We should embrace our failures and view them as perfect opportunities to grow. By establishing a process that immediately addresses our failures or shortcomings, we also immediately focus our attention on how we can improve, where we have deficiencies and perhaps most importantly, we immediately begin the process of learning and growth.

    Jon B. Becker

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  • Why Healing From Your Past Trauma Makes You a Great Leader | Entrepreneur

    Why Healing From Your Past Trauma Makes You a Great Leader | Entrepreneur

    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    In today’s rapidly evolving business landscape, leaders face numerous challenges that demand adaptability, empathy and resilience. However, many leaders may first need to learn how their past emotional and psychological wounds impact their present leadership style. The growing interest in trauma and its effects on individuals has shed light on the significance of trauma integration as a competitive advantage in business.

    By actively working to heal and integrate their childhood trauma, leaders can develop greater self-awareness, empathy and comfort with vulnerability, ultimately creating a desire to uplift others. This article explores the benefits of healing for leaders and organizations, highlighting how trauma-informed leadership cultivates a distinct competitive edge.

    Related: 5 Ways Our Emotional Past Manifests in Leadership

    Understanding trauma and its influence on leadership style

    Trauma encompasses various experiences that overwhelm an individual’s ability to cope and can leave lasting imprints on their psyche. These experiences may range from childhood neglect or abuse to traumatic events in adulthood. Trauma disrupts safety and trust, leading to potential long-term effects such as conflict avoidance, self-limiting thoughts and emotional dysregulation. Unresolved trauma shapes leadership styles. It can result in aggression, control, resistance to change and difficulty forming connections. Leaders with trauma may also struggle with trust, delegation, openness and effective communication.

    The benefits of trauma integration for leaders

    By recognizing the influence of trauma on leadership, individuals can embark on a journey of healing and integration. That leads to more conscious and effective leadership, fostering trust, collaboration and healthier work environments for all.

    1. Increased self-awareness and personal growth

    Trauma integration promotes self-reflection and understanding, enabling leaders to gain insights into their triggers, patterns and emotional responses. Leaders can identify and address unresolved issues that may hinder their growth by consciously exploring past traumas. This process allows them to develop deep self-awareness, leading to personal transformation and enhanced leadership effectiveness.

    For example, a leader who experienced neglect in childhood may unconsciously seek validation from others, leading to overwork and burnout. Through trauma integration, they can recognize this pattern and learn healthier ways to meet their emotional needs, fostering a more balanced and sustainable leadership approach.

    2. Enhanced empathy and emotional intelligence

    Trauma integration enables leaders to develop heightened empathy and emotional intelligence as they better understand their pain and struggle. Profound leadership demands leaders confront their trauma. Honing their ability to comprehend the emotions of others. That produces a positive work atmosphere that nurtures empathy and compassion throughout an organization.

    Empathetic leaders are better equipped to support their teams, understand their needs and create an environment where individuals feel valued and heard. This leads to increased employee satisfaction, engagement and overall well-being.

    Related: How Emotional Intelligence Can Improve Your Productivity

    3. Embracing vulnerability and building trust

    Trauma integration helps leaders become more comfortable with vulnerability as they confront their fears and insecurities. Leaders create a safe space for open communication and vulnerability within their teams by sharing their stories of growth and resilience.

    Building trust is essential for effective leadership. When leaders model vulnerability and authenticity, it encourages team members to do the same, fostering a culture of trust and psychological safety. This trust enables teams to collaborate more effectively, innovate and take calculated risks, ultimately driving organizational success.

    Read More: How to Understand the Link Between Childhood Trauma and Entrepreneurship

    Organizational advantages

    1. Improved employee well-being and reduced attrition rate

    Conscious leaders who have integrated their trauma create an environment where employees feel seen, heard, respected and valued. This sense of psychological safety reduces employee turnover and attrition rates, as individuals are more likely to stay in an organization where they feel supported and understood.

    Research on post-traumatic growth supports the positive correlation between trauma-informed leadership and employee well-being. Working under trauma-informed leaders significantly benefits employees by reducing stress levels, promoting positive mental health and increasing job satisfaction overall. These factors ultimately lead to a more engaged and resilient workforce.

    2. Increased employee loyalty and productivity

    Trauma-informed leaders foster loyalty by cultivating solid interpersonal connections with their teams. A workplace that values employee well-being will likely cultivate a committed workforce loyal to the organization’s vision. Leaders who exhibit genuine care and support can foster such an environment.

    Additionally, trauma-informed leadership enhances employee productivity. Leaders enhance workplace performance by creating an environment that respects and appreciates employees. Investing in their growth and well-being fosters a culture of excellence that inspires extraordinary achievements.

    3. Enhanced organizational culture and profitability

    Trauma-informed leadership positively influences organizational culture by promoting inclusivity, collaboration and empathy. By focusing on employee well-being, leaders can establish a workplace that fosters growth, learning and innovation in a culture of support.

    A healthy organizational culture, fostered by trauma-informed leadership, directly impacts profitability. Research from Gallup has shown that organizations with positive work cultures experience higher employee engagement, customer satisfaction and tremendous financial success.

    Related: Career Trauma Is a Real Thing. Here’s How to Recognize and Recover From It.

    The case for trauma integration in leadership

    Numerous examples demonstrate the transformative power of trauma-informed leadership. Successful leaders who have integrated their trauma have experienced personal growth and achieved remarkable organizational results.

    The works of renowned experts such as Dr. Gabor Maté, Dr. Bessel van der Kolk and Dr. Nicole LePera provide valuable insights into trauma integration and its impact on how we show up in all aspects of our lives. Their respective books are resources that deepen the understanding of trauma and its effects and provide guidance on how trauma-informed leaders can effectively integrate their experiences for personal growth and enhanced leadership influence.

    In short, leaders experience personal growth, enhanced self-awareness and increased emotional intelligence by addressing and integrating their past traumas. Consequently, this positively affects the organization’s culture and employee wellness, ultimately improving overall performance. Trauma-informed leaders are competitive over wounded leaders, as they create supportive environments, foster trust and drive success.

    Trauma integration is the new competitive advantage for leaders seeking new levels of potential. By actively working to heal and integrate their past trauma, leaders create safe and empowering environments for their teams. Organizations led by trauma-informed leaders experience reduced attrition rates, increased employee loyalty and improved productivity, leading to higher profit margins and a sustainable competitive edge.

    Kelly Campbell

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  • How Unlearning These Toxic Traits Made This Entrepreneur a Better Communicator | Entrepreneur

    How Unlearning These Toxic Traits Made This Entrepreneur a Better Communicator | Entrepreneur

    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    I could see it in her eyes. I scared her to the point of shivering. At the time, I didn’t care. I didn’t apologize. But a week after the incident, the guilt of the pain I caused started to set in, and I knew that changes had to be made.

    This wasn’t the first time my aggressive and combative communication style had killed a relationship. It was a toxic behavioral pattern — one that I was repeating too many times to count — and it was impacting my life both personally and professionally.

    Simon Lovell

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  • Kidnappers in Pakistan Held a Gun to His Head and Pulled the Trigger. The Terror of That Moment Fueled His Billion Dollar Startup.

    Kidnappers in Pakistan Held a Gun to His Head and Pulled the Trigger. The Terror of That Moment Fueled His Billion Dollar Startup.

    Two decades ago, Omair Tariq survived a nightmarish ordeal that left him with deep trauma. But it also gave him something exceptional. And he used it to funnel his ambitions into cofounding Cart.com.

    Liz Brody

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