ReportWire

Tag: marriage

  • Utah woman says her close friend is way too touchy with her husband. The young mom needs to know: Is their relationship too friendly?

    Nothing sends TikTokers into DEFCON-1 faster than a “bestie” who can’t keep her hands off someone else’s husband.

    One Utah mom shared her now-viral confession on TikTok, spilling that her close friend is constantly touching, lingering, and orbiting her husband like it’s her full-time job. She even follows him around the room when he tries to create space. The twist? This so-called touchy-feely friend is married, too. The wife insists she trusts her husband and doesn’t think he’s interested, but the viewers have other ideas. 

    How friendly is too friendly?

    It seems that the new episode of The Real Housewives has dropped–oh wait, actually it’s the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. No, really. This is what Ashtyn Smith’s (@ashtynsmithrn) friend said they could be. Yes, the same friend who is touchy with her husband. The story all unravels when Smith posts a series of TikToks asking for advice. The first clip has 856,000 views and over 4,000 comments. Her text overlay shares: “Need advice yall. What do I do about this.” 

    Smith begins by saying that her friend, who is also married, is very touchy with her husband.

    “Like she touches him multiple times that they’re together for like five minutes,” Smith says. She clarifies that her friend’s husband is also friends with them, so they all know each other.

    In another clip, she also says their kids are friends, so she’s trying to be careful. Apparently, she feels so uncomfortable and even gets anxiety prior to hanging out with the friend.

    “Even when he moves around the couch, she’ll like follow him and stand next to him,” Smith says, adding that she’s “not worried” about her husband but simply wants advice on how to deal with her friend because she’s a “good friend” and doesn’t want to lose her.

    More Red Flags

    In the following update clips, Smith shares a little more about the situation and how she and her husband plan to deal with it. In the second clip of 70,000 views, she shares some “red flags” she should have noticed a long time ago. According to her, her friend has also told the husband that he “looks so cute” in his outfits.

    In another example, the friend would suggest that Smith “send your husband over with the kids” so she could feed them dinner. Smith thought this was an innocent and kind offer, but is now rethinking the motives. She says her friend is currently on a trip, but once she returns, Smith will take what viewers have given for advice and utilize it.

    What Will She Do?

    In part three of the story, Smith shares the “plan” she and her husband came up with. They plan to distance themselves for a few weeks first and once upon meeting again, if the friend gets touchy, Smith will “call her out.” She thinks that if she confronts her and tells her it is weird, then that will “shock” her. The creator goes on to share that after posting on TikTok for advice, she feels validated and can accept that it is, in fact, a strange thing for someone to do. She also says, “I don’t think my husband is interested at all, but it’s still just a hard situation.”

    Under that clip, viewers seem to agree as one in declaring that Smith should not be the one to call her friend out. The top comment with over 2,500 likes states, “I feel it’s HIS place to say something to her and say it in front of you.”

    Other viewers seem to focus on another aspect. “Wait. You ‘don’t think’ your husband is interested? Sis………” says one viewer. 

    @ashtynsmithrn OK, I feel so bad even posting this, but I literally need some advice because I feel like she just gets more and more comfortable with doing it. What do I do?! #needadvice #marriedcouple #help ♬ original sound – AshtynsmithRN

    Viewers are Side-eyeing the Marriage

    Many viewers are eager to jump to Smith concerning her marriage. One viewer, however, asks the important question of whether Smith has spoken to her husband about it. Her reply: “Yes and he doesn’t like it either.” 

    The rest of the comments are not that optimistic. “No just no. My best friend was always hugging and touchy to my husband. He didn’t respond and even looked uncomfortable. Couple years later started a seven year affair. I found out last year. Absolute devastation. He should have set boundaries from the very beginning,” shares one viewer. 

    Another viewer simply says, “She likes him.” A second shares, “She’s testing your (and his) boundaries. A ‘good friend’ doesn’t do that. Trust your intuition here.” 

    Lastly, one says, “They already have something going on.”

    Of course, some do deliver advice. One viewer says, “Normalize letting people know when they make you feel uncomfortable.” 

    Another shares a dialogue for Smith to use: “Listen friend, I appreciate your friendship and hanging out with you and your husband, however the amount of attention being given to my husband is making me uncomfortable. I would appreciate you being mindful around us and keeping your hands to yourself. Thank you.”

    The Mary Sue reached out to Smith via email.

    Have a tip we should know? [email protected]

    Image of Gisselle Hernandez

    Gisselle Hernandez

    Gisselle Hernandez-Gomez is a contributing reporter to the Mary Sue. Her work has appeared in the Daily Dot, Business Insider, Fodor’s Travel and more.

    Gisselle Hernandez

    Source link

  • Towns once run by polygamous sect emerge from court supervision transformed

    COLORADO CITY, Ariz. — The prairie dresses, walled compounds and distrust of outsiders that were once hallmarks of two towns on the Arizona-Utah border are mostly gone.

    These days, Colorado City, Arizona, and neighboring Hildale, Utah, look much like any other town in this remote and picturesque area near Zion National Park, with weekend soccer games, a few bars, and even a winery.

    Until courts wrested control of the towns from a polygamous sect whose leader and prophet, Warren Jeffs, was imprisoned for sexually assaulting two girls, youth sports, cocktail hours and many other common activities were forbidden. The towns have transformed so quickly that they were released from court-ordered supervision last summer, almost two years earlier than expected.

    It wasn’t easy.

    “What you see is the outcome of a massive amount of internal turmoil and change within people to reset themselves,” said Willie Jessop, a onetime spokesman for the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints who later broke with the sect. “We call it ‘life after Jeffs’ — and, frankly, it’s a great life.”

    Some former members have fond memories of growing up in the FLDS, describing mothers who looked out for each other’s kids and playing sports with other kids in town.

    But they say things got worse after Jeffs took charge following his father’s death in 2002. Families were broken apart by church leaders who cast out men deemed unworthy and reassigned their wives and children to others. On Jeffs’ orders, children were pulled from public school, basketball hoops were taken down, and followers were told how to spend their time and what to eat.

    “It started to go into a very sinister, dark, cult direction,” said Shem Fischer, who left the towns in 2000 after the church split up his father’s family. He later returned to open a lodge in Hildale.

    Church members settled in Colorado City and Hildale in the 1930s so they could continue practicing polygamy after the sect broke away from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the mainstream Mormon church that renounced plural marriage in 1890.

    Stung by the public backlash from a disastrous 1953 raid on the FLDS, authorities turned a blind eye to polygamy in the towns until Jeffs took over.

    After being charged in 2005 with arranging the marriage of a teenage girl to a 28-year-old follower who was already married, Jeffs went on the run, making the FBI’s Ten Most Wanted Fugitives list before his arrest the next year. In 2011, he was convicted in Texas of sexually assaulting two girls ages 12 and 15 and sentenced to life in prison.

    Even years after Jeffs’ arrest, federal prosecutors accused the towns of being run as an arm of the church and denying non-followers basic services such as building permits, water hookups and police protection. In 2017, the court placed the towns under supervision, excising the church from their governments and shared police department. Separately, supervision of a trust that controlled the church’s real estate was turned over to a community board, which has been selling it.

    The towns functioned for 90 years largely as a theocracy, so they had to learn how to operate “a first-generation representative government,” Roger Carter, the court-appointed monitor, pointed out in his progress reports.

    The FLDS had controlled most of the towns’ land through a trust, allowing its leaders to dictate where followers could live, so private property ownership was new to many. People unaccustomed to openness and government policies needed clarification about whether decisions were based on religious affiliation.

    Although the towns took direction from the sect in the past, their civic leaders now prioritize residents’ needs, Carter wrote before the court lifted the oversight last July.

    With its leader in prison and stripped of its control over the towns, many FLDS members left the sect or moved away. Other places of worship have opened, and practicing FLDS members are now believed to account for only a small percentage of towns’ populations.

    Hildale Mayor Donia Jessop, who was once distantly related to Willie Jessop through marriage, said the community has made huge strides. Like others, she has reconnected with family members who were divided by the church and quit talking to each other.

    When a 2015 flood in Hildale killed 13 people, she was one of many former residents who returned to help look for missing loved ones. She got a chance to visit with a sister she hadn’t seen in years.

    “We started to realize that the love was still there — that my sister that I hadn’t been able to speak to for in so many years was still my sister, and she missed me as bad as I missed her,” the mayor said. “And it just started to open doors that weren’t open before.”

    Longtime resident Isaac Wyler said after the FLDS expelled him in 2004, he was ostracized by the people he grew up with, a local store wouldn’t sell him animal feed, he was refused service at a burger joint and police ignored his complaints that his farm was being vandalized.

    Things are very different now, he said. For one thing, his religious affiliation no longer factors into his encounters with police, Wyler said. And that feed store, burger joint and the FLDS-run grocery store have been replaced by a big supermarket, bank, pharmacy, coffee shop and bar.

    “Like a normal town,” he said.

    People with no FLDS connections have also been moving in.

    Gabby Olsen, who grew up in Salt Lake City, first came to the towns in 2016 as an intern for a climbing and canyoneering guide service. She was drawn to the mountains and canyons, clean air and 300 days of sunshine each year.

    She said people asked “all the time” whether she was really going to move to a place known for polygamy, but it didn’t bother her.

    “When you tell people, ‘Hey, we’re getting married in Hildale,’ they kind of chuckle, because they just really don’t know what it’s about,” said Olsen’s husband, Dion Obermeyer, who runs the service with her. “But of course when they all came down here, they’re all quite surprised. And you’re like, ‘Oh yeah, there’s a winery.’”

    Even with the FLDS’ influence waning, it’s not completely gone and the towns are dealing with some new problems.

    Residents say the new openness has brought common societal woes such as drug use to Hildale and Colorado City.

    And some people are still practicing polygamy: A Colorado City sect member with more than 20 spiritual “wives,” including 10 underage girls, was sentenced in late 2024 to 50 years in prison for coercing girls into sexual acts and other crimes.

    Briell Decker, who was 18 when she became Jeffs’ 65th “wife” in an arranged marriage, turned her back on the church. These days, she works for a residential support center in Colorado City that serves people leaving polygamy.

    Now 40 and remarried with a child, Decker said she thinks it will take several generations to recover from the FLDS’ abuses under Jeffs.

    “I do think they can, but it’s going to take a while because so many people are in denial,” Decker said. “Still, they want to blame somebody. They don’t really want to take accountability.” ___

    Associated Press religion coverage receives support through the AP’s collaboration with The Conversation US, with funding from Lilly Endowment Inc. The AP is solely responsible for this content.

    Source link

  • Navigating Perimenopause Together – How to Strengthen Your Relationship in Midlife

    What to Expect in Midlife 

    Perimenopause symptoms that signal the beginning of the menopause transition for women happen a lot earlier than many of us expect and not the way we often anticipate. The average age of menopause (the day after a woman has gone a full year without her period) is 51. Everyday after is considered postmenopause.

    But the average age for perimenopause is 45 and symptoms can start as early as mid-30s. They tend to be earlier and more severe for women of colour and people with unresolved trauma and can last up to 7-10 years.

    For me, it wasn’t the typical irregular or heavier periods or hot flashes that I noticed. First it was joint stiffness and what I later discovered was frozen shoulder. Then came increasing pain, headaches and insomnia during my menstrual cycle that felt debilitating at times. This was followed by brain fog, weight gain, anxiety and then depressive thoughts and significant dips in my libido. I’ve never struggled so much with finishing writing, something that has always come naturally to me, or felt so fatigued. This invoked fear as a solopreneur and shame for my lack of productivity and need for so much more rest.

    Unexpected Struggles

    Like many women I’ve talked to, it’s been a much bigger struggle than expected and we’re still having to navigate a range of surprising symptoms and varying, sometimes contradictory recommendations. For example, there’s been hesitation by some health care providers to prescribe vaginal estrogen cream which can help with painful intercourse from thinning and dryness and other genital urinary symptoms such as frequent urinary tract infections,

    And men are changing too in midlife. Some men go through something known as andropause; symptoms caused by a slow reduction in testosterone. You can learn more about it here.

    Midlife can be a time of increased stress from juggling work, aging parents and youth/young adult children while often experiencing decreased capacity and sleep challenges. Grief and loss can also bring up questions about life and our relationships.  

    Why Education and Prevention Matters 

    Shame is isolating but information is empowering. Remember, “It’s not you/me, it’s the situation” to stay connected even when you’re feeling less than, rejected or exhausted. 

    Lifestyle and relationship changes in midlife can not only reduce symptom severity and protect against divorce but they can save lives.

    Estrogen affects systems throughout the body but lifestyle changes can help reduce the the risks of cardiovascular conditions, dementia, osteoporosis, diabetes and suicide.  

    Change and getting help is not easy but a supportive partner can make all the difference. Take an invitational approach and either help your partner protect time for exercise and sleep by lightening their load (more on that below) or join them for walks or working out. Be mindful that female partners might be feeling more self-conscious as weight gain is a common symptom. So validate the struggle and put emphasis on long term benefits and improved energy, focus and mood over expected changes in weight or appearance. 

    Recognize warning signs of mental health struggles specific to perimenopause. Did you know women between 40- 59 in Canada are at the highest risk for suicide? This is likely similar in the States. Depression is especially common for those with a history of clinical depression, postpartum depression or PMMD. Try to reduce alcohol consumption or consider getting sober together and seek support for underlying issues, especially unprocessed grief, loss, trauma or infidelity.  

    A Necessary Shift to Protect Your Relationship – Me to We to Support Sharing the Load

    “It’s not just hormones.”

    A partner’s irritability and sometimes rage can feel surprising to men in a heterosexual relationship when a partner has generally been more quiet or agreeable. It’s easy to blame it on hormones and get defensive. While some women find themselves lashing out at supportive partners, more often than not, there are underlying issues. 

    Many women have been socialized to please and appease but as estrogen declines, so does their tolerance.  A common complaint for women in heterosexual relationships is partners not making the shift from “me to we,” leaving women carrying the weight of the load, including the mental and emotional load. 

    To protect the relationship, instead of waiting for her to ask for help and making decisions based on wants without considering the partner’s needs or household responsibilities, the Gottmans encourage this important shift: 

    ME TO WE: 

    • Recognizing one’s time is no longer our own
    • Preparing for being away by arranging for other help or outsourcing to lighten the partner’s load.  
    • Equally sharing household and childcare responsibilities
    • Taking initiative instead of waiting to be asked 

    Sharing the load as described by Eve Rodski in “Fair Play” as ”taking ownership from conception to completion” has the benefits of:

    • Protecting the relationship from resentment and often relationship breakdown
    • Valuing women’s time and energy protecting against burnout
    • Ensuring partners feel supported instead of alone or abandoned
    • Increasing women’s sexual desire and satisfaction 

    Thus, often women’s anger in perimenopause offers an opportunity to assess the relationship and reject rigid gender socialization. Couples can strengthen their relationship with crucial conversations about sharing the visible and mental load and deepening their friendship. 

    Friends for Life – Fondness and Admiration

    “The secret to lasting passion is actually a strong friendship.”

    In the beginning of all relationships, feel good neurotransmitters help keep us attracted to one another. But those don’t last and fluctuating hormones in midlife can lead to distance or disconnection. Fortunately, the Gottman’s Fondness and Admiration system can help you maintain a close connection as you weather the storms of midlife together. 

    How well do you really know your partner? To stay connected, you need to turn towards your partner’s bids for connection and show genuine interest in their inner world by building love maps. 

    Are you taking your partner and all they do for granted or are you expressing appreciation for the big and small ways they make your life a little easier, a little richer or more fun? 

    Speaking of fun, this article highlights the importance of maintaining a sense of playfulness  to transform your love life. Laughter and lightheartedness are good for our nervous system. How can you bring more playfulness into your relationship?

    While midlife can bring many challenges, couples can grow together by using Gottman practices to strengthen the foundation of their friendship and engage in healthy conflict to create a more equal relationship. 

    Growing Together, Instead of Growing Apart 

    “When done in safe and healthy ways, conflict has the ability to bring you closer together.”

    Let’s use a hypothetical couple Bill and Jane to illustrate the antidotes for the 4 Horsemen (Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling) or predictors of relationship breakdown. Instead of criticizing Jane for lashing out at him lately, which will only put her on the defensive, Bill uses a softened start up to express his complaint and need without blame:

    “I love when we find time to spend together. Lately I’ve been feeling confused and hurt when you lash out at me. I don’t know what I’ve done wrong and I’m worried you don’t want to be with me anymore. I find myself pulling away. I need to know what’s going on and for us to be kinder to each other.” 

    Importance of self soothing

    Instead of rolling her eyes in contempt or stonewalling due to flooding, Susan takes a few deep breaths to self-soothe. Although she’s been silently fuming for years over how uneven things feel, she realizes she needs to work on expressing her needs more and also wants them to treat each other with more kindness and respect. 

    She uses self-compassion to protect against shame. She never used to lash out. Sometimes the mood swings feel out of her control. Sometimes the sound of his chewing makes her want to scream. She validates Mark’s feelings and expresses appreciation for his bringing up his concerns in a loving way. 

    It’s Jane’s turn to share using a softened start up:

    “I’m really struggling with how much I’m doing and the weight of the mental load. When I have to do all the planning and delegating, I feel exhausted and can’t relax. I’m feeling frustrated and alone. I need us to divide things up more evenly.”

    Instead of being stuck in traditional beliefs or getting defensive and saying something like “But you always seemed so capable and besides, if you really wanted my help, you would just ask,” Bill is willing to accept influence and listen as Susan begins to share about her experience, common to many women in the menopause transition years:  

    “I don’t have the same energy I used to have. Half the time I wake up and then can’t fall back to sleep. My body aches and I know exercise would help but there’s too much to do. I also hoped that now that the children are older, I would have more time for my book dream but I can’t focus long enough to finish a sentence. I’m so frustrated.”

    Difficult Conversations

    These aren’t easy conversations, especially if Jane has repeatedly tried to bring up the lack of equality to Mark and was met with indifference or defensiveness. If Mark can take responsibility for his part and use breaks of at least 20 minutes to self-regulate and both use repairs to get things back on track, there’s still hope. Conversations about the dreams within conflict can help couples move beyond issues that feel gridlocked and ultimately come closer together.

    If a partner turns against or is abusive, safety needs to be the first priority. Resources for safety can be found here.

    Statistics show that more women than men are likely to initiate divorce in midlife, usually after years of feeling unsupported, unheard or undervalued. Instead of avoiding conflict, the Gottmans provide a roadmap for restoring and deepening connection.

    Midlife Reflections

    Navigating perimenopause and all the changes and stressors of midlife can feel overwhelming. It can bring up a lot of emotions and increase conflict. But it’s also an opportunity for couples to improve their lifestyle and relationship. 

    Some questions to support you are:

    How active are we? 

    How well is our sleeping and eating? 

    How safe – emotionally and physically do I feel with my partner?

    How equally divided are the family and household responsibilities, including care for aging parents and the mental load? 

    How appreciated do we each feel? 

    Do we make time to connect, have fun and be silly together? 

    How well are we supporting each other’s dreams and career ambitions? 

    Do we feel better or worse after conflict? 

    Remember, there’s no such thing as a perfect relationship and it’s normal to go through ebbs in flows in libido, energy and mood. But by using the Gottman practices to cultivate friendship and healthy conflict along with regular State of the Union meetings to not let resentment build and deepen connection, midlife can be an opportunity to grow stronger together. 

    Nicole Schiener

    Source link

  • ‘It’s still going on’: New York woman goes on family trip to Disney—then she receives a suspicious call from her husband. So, she Googles his location

    If there’s one thing few can resist, it’s a salacious cheating story.

    From the mega-viral cheaters at a Coldplay concert to cheating apology meals at Olive Garden, cheating scandals are the ultimate car crash we can’t look away from. Now, there’s a new viral story making the rounds in the form of one woman’s video on TikTok.

    And it all started with a trip to Disney.

    What happened at Disney?

    In a video posted on Jan. 20 that has since racked up over 175,000 views, TikTok user Krys Lyn (@krystle_lyn) details how she methodically investigated her husband’s infidelity. This video is apparently the first installment of more videos to come.

    “Let me tell you how I caught my husband cheating,” Lyn begins in her video. “Not just a moment. It’s been a whole freaking season.

    Lyn says the whole thing is “still fresh,” and she and her husband first became engaged in May 2025.

    “In September, he goes to jail,” Lyn says without elaborating. “October, he goes to rehab. Straight from jail to rehab. He gets out of rehab, he completes it. Everything’s perfect. We eventually elope, we get married.”

    Two weeks later, Lyn and her husband have a family Disney trip planned “on [her] dime, since [she] was the only one working ‘cause he was in jail and rehab.”

    Unfortunately, Lyn says his probation officers forbade him from going, so she went on the Disney trip just with their kids while he stayed home.

    This was the first time Lyn got an inkling that something was up.

    ‘My gut…ain’t lying’

    “He’s supposed to pick me and the kids up from our flight home,” Lyn says. “The night before, I get a phone call from him saying that my car was totaled. He hit a deer. He tells me what road he’s on, where he hit the deer. But then he made the mistake of sending me a picture of my totaled car with a porch in the background.”

    Lyn says she immediately had a gut feeling that there was something fishy about that porch. Sure enough, some research yielded confirmation of her instincts.

    “I Google the road that he was on,” Lyn recounts. “And I looked at every single house address on that road, and I found the matching porch. Guess what? Happened to be his ex-girlfriend’s mom’s house.”

    The observation begins and she confirms his cheating

    Lyn’s husband, who she says works as a car salesman, claimed he was just “delivering a title for work with the dealership,” but Lyn didn’t buy it. Then, the suspicious activity increased.

    “It gets worse,” Lyn says. “After my car’s towed away, and I’m in Disney and he’s home, my Alexas and the cameras are unplugged. This is like 9:30 at night.”

    Then, Lyn says he texted her randomly at four in the morning, which she says was “unlike him” due to him being on “sleeping meds.”

    But Lyn lay low. She says after she and the kids returned, she decided to “play it off.”

    “For a whole week, I continue to be wifey, I continue to be mom,” Lyn says. “I go to work, I’m home, acting like everything is normal … Throughout the week, I’m paying attention to him, his behavior … his texts, how often he’s picking up his phone. All of it. Because he was at his ex-girlfriend’s mom’s house.”

    While she was keeping tabs on her husband, she noticed the ex-girlfriend’s mom in question comment on one of his Facebook posts.

    “My intuition was right,” Lyn says.

    Things get worse

    Things only escalated from there. Lyn tells us she monitored his “nonstop” texts with two female co-workers, noticing he would pin those conversation threads to his “favorites” and then delete them days later. She says the continuously vanishing texts “didn’t add up.”

    “They’re disappearing like he’s in the witness protection program at this point,” Lyn half-jokes. “This is a week and a half after I got home. I’ve been quiet. I’ve been silent this whole time, OK? It’s like a crime scene on a Netflix documentary. He just doesn’t know it yet. And neither do the women, the mistresses.”

    But Lyn stayed patient. Ultimately, her husband grew careless, getting “tipsy” and forgetting to delete some of his incriminating texts.

    “I didn’t drink at the time,” Lyn says. “So I wait till he passes out. I get on his phone, I see some messages … I take a picture of them from his phone on my phone, so then they’re still there.

    So he can see that I haven’t done anything with them, didn’t send them to myself, nothing. But I have them on my phone. I also marked them as unread.”

    She finds out more about his cheating

    Later, Lyn’s husband accidentally revealed he’d been messaging a woman on TikTok when he tried to show Lyn a TikTok.

    “And I just look at him, and he makes eye contact with me,” Lyn recounts. “And he knows. He knows.”

    Lyn and her friends waste no time in cracking down on a more intensive investigation at this point, calling Lyn’s husband’s dealership and getting information about the women Lyn suspected he was cheating with, one emotionally and one sexually—both of which, according to Lyn, had boyfriends at the time.

    “One [of the women], the one with the emotional affair, gets wind of it, spazzes out, and then reaches out to me,” Lyn says. “She denied everything. Mind you .. I have on my phone, the pictures of their—him and her conversation.”

    The woman, whom Lyn calls “M,” maintained that nothing happened between her and Lyn’s husband. Lyn also says M is “best friends” with the other suspected woman, who came up on her husband’s TikTok, Willow.

    More denial

    “I have proof,” Lyn says. “Willow, [M] sends screenshots of my husband having the affair with Willow, sexual affair with Willow. But M denies everything.”

    But Lyn says she already has proof of M and her husband having an “emotional affair” via text message.

    “They all work at the same dealership,” Lyn says. “This is when their jobs start disappearing. Stay tuned for part two. It gets juicy.”

    @krystle_lyn Story time! ?? How I caught my car salesman husband cheating with the BDC homewreckers at his work. #fyp #viral #cheatinghusband #homewrecker #fypシ゚viral ♬ original sound – Krys Lyn ?

    Viewers are shocked at the story

    As of the writing of this article, Lyn has yet to upload a formal “part two” to this saga, though multiple videos of hers reference dealing with a cheater.

    Viewers, for their part, are sipping proverbial tea in reaction to Lyn’s wild tale. Many are positively fiending for a part two, even commenting on her later videos, begging for an update.

    Some commenters wanted more details, specifically about the dealership. One cheekily asks, “So what dealership am I NOT shopping at?”

    Lyn responded with a glowing review of the dealership itself.

    “Oh the dealership handled it all beautifully,” she wrote. “I actually was very impressed. Highly suggest giving them all the business.”

    Other commenters were dying laughing at the all-too-relatable phenomenon of undergoing FBI-level investigations with your girls.

    “LOVE the friend investigation,” one viewer wrote. “My friends helped me as well.”

    Still others were outraged that Lyn was dealing with this at all, with many offering words of support and encouragement.

    “You are way too beautiful too be dealing with this!!!” wrote one commenter. Another agreed, saying, “You deserve so much better than this!”

    The Mary Sue has reached out to Lyn via TikTok comment to request additional comment.

    Have a tip we should know? [email protected]

    Image of Sophia Paslidis

    Sophia Paslidis

    Source link

  • Woman goes in bank with her husband. Then the 3 female bank clerks give him a sexist warning about her: ‘Like it’s OUR money. We are ONE’

    A woman went to her local bank with her husband, only for bank clerks to make rude remarks about her in front of him.

    According to Zoe Goulet (@zogoulet), “all three of the clerks” questioned her husband’s decision to put her name on his bank account. They reportedly told her husband that “she could take all of [his] money and run with it.”

    Goulet responded by restating that she was his wife and that it was their money, not just his. Since then, many viewers have shared their perspectives, urging the couple to reconsider their bank due to what they described as the teller’s blatant sexism.

    The TikToker’s video garnered more than 817,000 views as of Thursday.

    Why did the bank tellers shame her?

    Based on Goulet’s video, it seems that the tellers shamed her for wanting to be on her husband’s bank account. It was a joint decision by the couple, something they emphasized in the comments. Ultimately, the remarks were unnecessary in the context of the situation.

    But bank tellers did have some information and insight to offer Goulet and her husband.

    “As a banker myself, I wouldn’t word it like that,” one viewer said. “We do make sure the other person is aware that the person being added has 100% access. I have seen many times [where] someone [is] being added and they break up/ divorce. [Then, the] money is gone. [I’m] not saying that’s you… but we have seen it.”

    It is true that when a couple has a joint bank account, both parties can make withdrawals and deposits. That means if one person were to take thousands of dollars out of a shared savings account, they technically could do so.

    It is a common enough issue that there are hundreds of articles discussing the topic. Legal Clarity states that a financial institution is not responsible “at any time” for one person withdrawing all of the funds from a legally shared account.

    From this perspective, it could make more sense why the clerks were warning Goulet’s husband about the potential risks of the situation as a way of preventing further issues down the line.

    “Tellers are trained to ask questions and be kind of nosey to prevent fraud, they most likely just needed to confirm with [the] husband that is what he really wanted,” added another commenter. “You’d be surprised how many people don’t know what a joint account is/equal access for both parties.”

    Are bank tellers noticeably more rude than in previous years?

    Bank tellers may have more “audacity,” at least according to some recent interactions that others on the internet have had.

    For instance, one woman went to a Chase Bank to get some documents notarized. The tellers proceeded to allegedly make fun of her height until she was near tears.

    For many viewers, they also had trouble with bank tellers outright refusing to help them create joint bank accounts.

    One commenter shared, “Omg! We did the same thing & the clerk (a woman) was like ‘are you sure you don’t want to keep a private account for yourself just incase’ and I was like “ummmm no I’m good.”

    The Goulet family found the comments rude and incendiary, especially considering that the tellers could have asked standard questions to determine whether Goulet’s husband was making the financial decision with the correct intentions. The questions, however, felt more like jokes than genuine concerns.

    “I would’ve immediately asked to take all our money and investments out and went to a different bank. Tellers should be professional regardless of the situation,” said one commenter.

    Surprisingly, though, some commenters agreed with the bank tellers, saying that it was Goulet’s husband’s money, not hers.

    “No, it’s not our money. It’s his money if it’s his labor to produce the money it’s his money. Yeah, I would never put my spouse on my banking account,” added one viewer. Goulet’s husband, Macgregor Goulet, responded, saying, “She’s gonna carry OUR baby for 9 months then push out OUR baby in labor… way harder than any labor I’ve done. It’s her money just as much as it is mine.”

    Ultimately, other people’s relationships and marriages are different. Some couples are more comfortable putting a spouse on their personal banking accounts or having one unified account. It can be a practical option for couples who share children or other living expenses and want to simplify their finances. For others, it can be a harder decision to make.

    @zogoulet

    Like it’s OUR money. We are ONE!!

    ♬ original sound – kell yeah!

    The Mary Sue reached out to the Goulet family via email for comment.

    Have a tip we should know? [email protected]

    Image of Rachel Thomas

    Rachel Thomas

    Rachel Joy Thomas is a music journalist, freelance writer, and hopeful author who resides in Los Angeles, CA. You can email her at [email protected].

    Rachel Thomas

    Source link

  • What is ‘Gray Divorce’?

    The divorce announcement by Bill and Melinda Gates took many people by surprise. From the outside, it seemed that the couple’s lives were very intertwined. Why do this now after 27 years of marriage?

    Despite the fact that overall divorce rates in the U.S. dropped since the 1980s, the rate of divorce among people over 50 climbed to historic levels. Over the past two decades, the rate doubled. Now, one in four divorces is a “gray divorce.”

    Marriage in an Empty Nest

    There’s been a generational shift in the way that people in their 50s and 60s think about their relationships. With the stigma of divorce lessening over time, couples no longer feel bound to stick it out in a bad marriage. With longer life expectancy, there’s a sense that there’s a whole lot of living to be done and time goes by quickly.

    Couples often accomplished career or parenting goals by now. Long-standing disconnection in the marriage can be just one of many catalysts for partners to leave.  

    Couples whose kids have left for college will sometimes feel adrift. Routines, roles, and rituals that organized their lives for years come to an abrupt halt. “We don’t even know each other anymore,” my client Nate* told me, as he and Lily*, his wife of 23 years, talked in a session about trying to reconnect with each other. They were “Mom and Dad” for the last 20 years. Parenting their two kids had been their only common focus. That empty nest has lots of possibilities, but it can be a lonely place for many couples.

    A New Chance at Independence

    Another factor driving the increase in later-in-life divorcing is the increased financial independence of women. According to the AARP, two-thirds of these divorces in heterosexual marriages are initiated by women. No longer tied to a spouse for financial security, women are looking at their next 20 or 30 years and weighing a stale marriage against what could be an exciting new chapter.

    “I stopped trying to get Luis* to take vacations 15 years ago. There was just no point. He would just argue with me,” my client Chloe* told me. “Now that I’m retired,  I want to pursue my dream of traveling. We are now so far apart that I don’t even want him to join me.”  Chloe and Luis are an example of a couple type that was observed in Dr. Gottman’s research—the later-stage divorcing relationship—one in which there isn’t a lot of conflict, but there’s little positivity between the partners.

    Three Tips for Staying Together

    If you are in a long-term relationship, here are some research-based suggestions for how to create and maintain a vibrant relationship that thrives over the years:

    • Maintain a good friendship with your partner over time. Make sure you’re spending some time together having fun. This goes double for parents. You need time together without the kids. This keeps your relationship on the front burner so that it doesn’t become a casualty of parenting. It also keeps you in touch with how you and your partner are changing over time.
    • Address differences in a timely way to avoid building up resentment. Research shows that conflict is normal and to be expected in any relationship. The quality that separates happy from unhappy relationships is the ability to repair quickly.
    • Focus on how you’d like the relationship to be in the future. Share dreams and hopes for what you each want to accomplish, separately and together. Creating a sense of shared meaning that evolves over time and throughout the life cycle is another hallmark of a thriving relationship. 

    Final Thought

    For many couples, the choice to divorce after years of being together is absolutely the right choice to make. No longer bound by obligation, expectation, or finances, unhappy partners can find a new lease on life being apart. For couples re-evaluating their long-term relationship and who want to stay together but see the need for minor tune-ups or major overhauls, keep in mind that your relationship is constantly evolving just as you are. As partners, you can intentionally create and change that relationship in small ways every day.

     

    Sinead Smyth

    Source link

  • The 6 Things That Predict Divorce

    The first step toward improving or enhancing your marriage is to understand what happens when relationships fail. This has been well documented by extensive research into couples that were not able to save their marriages. Learning about their failures can prevent your relationship from making the same mistakes — or rescue it if it already has.

    In “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work,” I list the six things that predict divorce. This ability to predict divorce is based in part on my analysis of the 130 newlywed couples who were observed at the “Love Lab” apartment at the University of Washington.

    During our research study, my team and I asked these couples to spend fifteen minutes in the lab trying to resolve an ongoing disagreement they were having while we videotaped them. As they spoke, sensors attached to their bodies gauged their stress levels based on various measurements of their circulatory system. Here is what I discovered.

    1. Harsh Startup

    The most obvious indicator that a conflict discussion (and marriage) is not going to go well is the way it begins. When a discussion leads off with criticism and/or sarcasm (a form of contempt), it has begun with a “harsh startup.” My research shows that if your discussion begins with a harsh startup, it will inevitably end on a negative note. Statistics tell the story: 96% of the time, you can predict the outcome of a conversation based on the first three minutes of the interaction.

    2. The Four Horsemen

    Certain kinds of negativity, if allowed to run rampant, are so lethal to a relationship that we call them the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Usually, these four horsemen clip-clop into the heart of a marriage in the following order: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Read more about The Four Horsemen and their antidotes here.

    3. Flooding

    Flooding means that your partner’s negativity—whether in the guise of criticism or contempt or even defensiveness—is so overwhelming, and so sudden, that it leaves you shell-shocked. A marriage’s meltdown can be predicted, then, by habitual harsh startup and frequent flooding brought on by the relentless presence of the four horsemen during disagreements. Although each of these factors alone can predict a divorce, they usually coexist in an unhappy marriage. Read more about flooding here.

    4. Body Language

    When my team monitored couples for bodily changes during a conflict discussion, we could see just how physically distressing flooding was. One of the most apparent of these physical reactions is that the heart speeds up – pounding away at more than 100 beats per minute – even as high as 165. Hormonal changes occur, too, including the secretion of adrenaline. Blood pressure also mounts. The physical sensations of feeling flooded make it virtually impossible to have a productive, problem-solving discussion.

    5. Failed Repair Attempts

    It takes time for the four horsemen and flooding that comes in their wake to overrun a marriage. And yet, divorce can so often be predicted by listening to a single conversation. How can this be?

    The answer is that by analyzing any disagreement a couple has, you get a good sense of the pattern they tend to follow. A crucial part of that pattern is whether their repair attempts succeed or fail.

    Repair attempts are efforts the couple makes to deescalate the tension during a discussion. The failure of these attempts is an accurate marker for an unhappy future. Read more about repair attempts here.

    6. Bad Memories

    When I interview couples, I always ask them about the history of their relationship. In a happy marriage, couples tend to look back on their early days fondly. They remember how positive they felt early on, how excited they were when they met, and how much admiration they had for each other. When they talk about the tough times they’ve had, they glorify the struggles they’ve been through, drawing strength from the adversity they weathered together. Learn more about the Oral History Interview here.

    The Art and Science of Love is now a live virtual workshop! Learn how to apply the Gottman Method to your relationship from the comfort of your home. Sign up today to register for the next event.

    John Gottman

    Source link

  • The Little Things That Keep Love Strong

    When we think about what makes relationships last, we often focus on big moments—weddings, anniversaries, major conflicts, or life transitions. But decades of research tell a different story: it’s the little things that keep love strong- the small, repeated moments of connection that matter most.

    These moments are called rituals of connection—intentional or habitual ways couples stay emotionally connected amid the bustle of daily life. Rituals are not just nice extras; they are essential building blocks of trust, friendship, and intimacy.

    What Are Rituals of Connection?

    Rituals of connection are predictable, meaningful interactions that help partners feel seen, valued, and emotionally close. They can be as simple as a morning kiss goodbye or as elaborate as a weekly date night. What matters most is not the activity itself, but the shared meaning and emotional presence behind it.

    In Gottman research, rituals often serve as reliable ways couples:

    • Turn toward each other instead of away
    • Express fondness and admiration
    • Strengthen their emotional bond
    • Create a sense of “us” in the relationship

    Over time, these rituals help couples build a strong foundation of friendship and connection.

    Rituals and Turning Toward

    One of the most powerful Gottman concepts connected to rituals is turning toward bids for connection. A bid can be a comment, question, gesture, or even a sigh—anything that says, “Are you there with me?”

    Rituals of connection create built-in opportunities for turning toward. For example:

    • Sharing coffee together every morning
    • Checking in by text during the workday
    • Asking about each other’s day at dinner

    When couples consistently turn toward these moments, they deposit into what Gottman calls the Emotional Bank Account. These deposits build goodwill that helps couples navigate conflict and stress more effectively.

    Why Small Moments Matter More Than Ever

    Modern life is full of distractions—work demands, parenting responsibilities, screens, and chronic stress. Many couples don’t drift apart because of major betrayals, but because connection slowly erodes.

    Rituals act as anchors. They remind partners:

    • “You matter to me.”
    • “Our relationship is a priority.”
    • “We are a team.”

    Research shows that couples who maintain rituals of connection experience higher relationship satisfaction and resilience, even during difficult seasons.

    How Do We Do It?

    This might feel like a new concept for you, but you may already be practicing some of these rituals, and not need to create them but rather be a bit more intentional about them. Rituals look different for every couple, but they often fall into a few key categories:

    1. Daily Rituals

    These are small, frequent moments that keep couples emotionally attuned.

    • A six-second kiss when reuniting
    • Saying “good morning” and “good night”
    • A daily check-in question like, “What’s one thing you’re looking forward to today?”

    2. Parting and Reunion Rituals

    How couples separate and reconnect matters deeply.

    • Sharing one thing about the day ahead before leaving
    • Putting phones down for the first 10 minutes after reuniting
    • Hugging before transitioning into tasks or parenting

    3. Stress-Reducing Conversations

    The Gottman Method emphasizes daily conversations where partners talk about external stress, not relationship problems.

    • Setting aside 20 minutes to listen without fixing
    • Asking open-ended questions
    • Offering empathy and support instead of solutions

    4. Weekly or Monthly Rituals

    These rituals create protected time for connection and fun.

    • Weekly date nights (they can be at home!)
    • Sunday morning walks
    • Monthly relationship check-ins

    5. Meaning and Tradition Rituals

    Some rituals carry deeper symbolic meaning.

    • Celebrating anniversaries in a specific way
    • Cultural or family traditions
    • Shared spiritual or reflective practices

    What Makes a Ritual Effective?

    Effective rituals share three core qualities:

    1. Consistency – They happen regularly, even when life gets busy.
    2. Presence – Partners are emotionally available and attentive.
    3. Shared Meaning – Both partners understand why the ritual matters.

    A ritual that feels obligatory or one-sided can lose its power. The goal is mutual engagement, not perfection.

    When Rituals Break Down

    Rituals often fade during transitions—new jobs, parenthood, illness, or increased stress. This doesn’t mean the relationship is failing; it means it’s time to intentionally rebuild.

    Couples can ask:

    • Which rituals have we lost?
    • What do we miss most about how we used to connect?
    • What small ritual could we reintroduce or create?

    Even one new ritual can begin to shift the emotional climate of a relationship.

    Creating Your Own Rituals of Connection

    You don’t need more time—you need more intention. Start small:

    • Choose one moment of the day to protect
    • Make it realistic and achievable
    • Revisit and adjust as life changes

    Successful relationships are not conflict-free, but they are rich in connection, and it’s the little things that can deepen connection.

    Final Thoughts

    Rituals of connection are quiet, powerful acts of love. They say, again and again, “I choose you.” Over time, these small moments weave together into a strong, resilient partnership—one built not on grand gestures, but on daily presence, care, and turning toward each other.

    The Gottman Institute

    Source link

  • New York heiress Belle Burden recounts the voicemail that torched her husband’s double life: memoir

    NEWYou can now listen to Fox News articles!

    When New York heiress Belle Burden and her then-husband, Henry Davis, decided to quarantine their family at their home in Martha’s Vineyard when the pandemic first started, she had no idea it would be the end of her marriage.

    The granddaughter of legendary magazine editor and heiress Babe Pailey wrote in an excerpt of her new memoir “Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage” published in The Sunday Times that six days after their family arrived at their vacation home, after a normal dinner in their kitchen, she received a phone call from a number she didn’t recognize, so she didn’t answer.

    When she played the voicemail left, it was a man’s voice.

    “He said, ‘I’m trying to reach Belle.’ He paused,” she wrote. “’I’m sorry to tell you this, but your husband is having an affair with my wife.’”

    CHERYL HINES BREAKS SILENCE ON HUSBAND RFK JR.’S ALLEGED ONLINE AFFAIR AHEAD OF JOURNALIST’S TELL-ALL

    Belle Burden with her ex-husband Henry Davis in 2008.   (Patrick McMullan via Getty Images)

    She didn’t even have to confront her husband, who seemed to know she knew.

    He initially claimed the affair, which he said had only been going on for weeks, meant nothing, and that he loved only her.

    While still trying to hide her world shattering from her children, and baking them turnovers as they requested that night, she called back the husband, who revealed he couldn’t talk because his wife had just tried to kill herself.

    DENISE RICHARDS’ ESTRANGED HUSBAND AARON PHYPERS SAYS HE’S ‘BEGGING FRIENDS FOR MONEY’ AS DIVORCE TURNS UGLY

    She moved through the next few hours in a daze, and after sleeping separately, and staying awake most of the night trying to decide if she could forgive him, he gave her another shock.

    Belle Burden's "Strangers" book

    Belle Burden’s “Strangers” book was released on Tuesday.  (Belle Burden/Instagram)

    The heiress wrote that her husband of 20 years walked into their bedroom, fully dressed, and told her matter-of-factly that he wanted a divorce, and he was leaving — right at that moment, apparently.

    He later told her she could have custody of their children.

    “In the days that followed, I tried to hide the truth from the girls,” she continued. “A therapist I spoke with said I should wait to tell them until the pandemic was less scary.”

    CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP FOR THE ENTERTAINMENT NEWSLETTER

    She added, “But instead of easing, the pandemic became more frightening. And so did I, appearing at dinner with swollen eyes and unwashed hair. I cried as I did laundry and scrubbed our lavatories. I spent hours behind the closed door of my bedroom. I decided not to drink, knowing it would make me sadder, but also found it hard to eat.”

    Belle Burden with her 21-year-old daughter

    Belle Burden with her 21-year-old daughter this year.  (Belle Burden/Instagram)

    She said her husband never explained to her what went wrong, and after initially supporting her, her husband’s family eventually cut her off.

    LIKE WHAT YOU’RE READING? CLICK HERE FOR MORE ENTERTAINMENT NEWS

    “Had life been normal, had we been in New York, had I been able to find him on the street and make him look me in the eye, maybe I would have had some understanding of what was happening,” she mused. “But I was on one island and he was on another, and I knew nothing — only the shock of his disappearance.”

    Babe Paley in a dress

    Burden is the granddaughter of famous heiress Babe Paley.  (Getty)

    Five years later, she says she’s no wiser about what went wrong.

    CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE FOX NEWS APP

    Burden wrote that her husband hasn’t remarried, and he works at a hedge fund and travels. He sees their children occasionally, but hasn’t changed his mind about not wanting to co-parent.

    “I don’t know why he left,” she added. “I don’t think I ever will.”

    “Strangers” was released on Tuesday. 

    Source link

  • Hailey Bieber Denies Rumor That She Re-Posted TikTok Video Calling Out ‘Addiction’ & ‘Abuse’ In Marriage With Justin! – Perez Hilton

    Hailey Bieber is setting the record straight when it comes to a recent rumor regarding her marriage to Justin Bieber!

    A social media user posted a screen recording of the Rhode Beauty founder’s supposed TikTok re-posts to X (Twitter) on Saturday, and what did they find? The person allegedly discovered Hailey re-posted a video from another content creator back on Thursday that called out the “abuse” in her relationship with the pop star! Whoa! The TikTok user claimed in the clip:

    “Most long-term relationships that we romanticize and congratulate only work because the woman is a tolerant co-dependent. And when I say tolerant, I mean she tolerates mediocrity, abuse, doing the majority of domestic and emotional labor, in exchange for being in a relationship. And that is a contract that I am opting out of. There is no better example than Hailey Bieber and Justin Bieber.”

    Related: Hailey Bieber Channels Gisele In Sexy New Victoria’s Secret Lingerie Shoot!

    Jeez. The woman went on to accuse Justin of struggling with addiction, saying:

    “People wonder how this relationship is still lasting. It is because Hailey is a tolerant, co-dependent woman. Hailey will never leave Justin. She is a stayer. I know some of you all love Justin. Justin is an addict. You cannot be a good partner or an equal partner when you are in addiction. And in my opinion, an addicted partner is always an abusive partner. The disease of addiction is too selfish for you to be anything else, but this relationship will work and people romanticize it because Hailey will tolerate that abuse.”

    A rep for the Never Say Never artist denied the persistent rumors that he’s using hard drugs last year, but is Hailey allegedly now confirming what many fans’ fear with this jaw-dropping video? Hmm. According to the social media user, the model “later deleted” the re-post. Ch-ch-check out the video (below):

    But here’s the thing…

    Hailey DENIES ever even re-posting the video in the first place! The 29-year-old makeup mogul took to Instagram Stories on Saturday to fire back:

    “Hey, I know you guys who live on the internet are really bored, but I didn’t repost any video speaking on my relationship. Have a beautiful Saturday!”

    (c) Hailey Bieber/Instagram

    So there you have it! Hailey insists it never happened!

    What are your reactions, Perezcious readers? Tell us in the comments (below)!

    [Image via Hailey Bieber/Justin Bieber/Instagram]

    Perez Hilton

    Source link

  • Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban are officially divorced after 19 years of marriage

    NASHVILLE, Tenn. — NASHVILLE, Tenn. (AP) — Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban are divorced and legally single, ending the 19-year marriage of one of entertainment’s most prominent power couples

    A Nashville, Tennessee, judge issued an order at a hearing Tuesday dissolving the marriage of the Oscar-winning actor and the Grammy-winning country singer.

    Judge Stephanie J. Williams said in a court filing that the couple’s settlements on splitting assets and child custody are sufficient, and granted them the divorce.

    Williams wrote that “there exist such irreconcilable difference between the parties that would render continuation of the marriage impractical and impossible.”

    Both Kidman and Urban waived their right to appear at the hearing.

    Messages to their representatives seeking comment were not immediately answered.

    Kidman filed for divorce in September. The superstar split was a surprise to most of the public, but it had clearly been in the works for a while. All the legal issues involving assets and custody had been settled and signed the day of her filing.

    Tennessee requires a 90-day waiting period for couples with minor children before a divorce can take effect.

    Kidman and Urban, both 58, have two teenage daughters together. Their divorce filing said they had “marital difficulties and irreconcilable differences.”

    The plan they signed states that Kidman would be the primary residential parent to the children. It suggested they would remain living in Nashville as they have all their lives. The filing states that neither parent would need child or spousal support, and lays out a roughly equal division of their joint assets.

    Two of the biggest stars to come out of Australia in recent decades, Kidman and Urban met in Los Angeles in 2005 and were married in Sydney the following year. They were red carpet fixtures throughout their two-decade relationship, with Urban joining his wife at the Oscars and Kidman attending music events like the Academy of Country Music Awards. The couple had publicly but lovingly described some marital difficulties, yet there were still few outward signs the divorce was coming.

    The marriage was the first for Urban and the second for Kidman, who was married to Tom Cruise from 1990 to 2001. Kidman also has two older children with Cruise.

    ___

    Dalton reported from Los Angeles.

    Source link

  • Are You Protecting Your Peace or Just Avoiding Hard Situations?

    What is “Protecting Your Peace”?

    You may have heard this term thrown around on social media, in self-help books, or even in your therapist’s office. “Protecting your peace” is the practice of guarding your mental and emotional wellbeing by distancing yourself from what disrupts it. It means being intentional about where you place your time and energy, and being willing to step away from what consistently harms your sense of calm.

    In healthy relationships, peace is not the absence of conflict. It’s the presence of trust, respect, and a reliable path back to connection after stress.

    At its core, protecting your peace is an act of self-care and self-respect. But sometimes people use this trendy catchphrase as a way to withdraw from challenges or avoid hard conversations, which is where it can become unhealthy instead of beneficial. It’s important to learn when protecting your peace is healthy, and when it’s a convenient excuse for avoidance.

    The Core of Protecting Your Peace

    Protecting your peace is about building habits that support calm, connection, and happiness. Here are four components that make it healthy and effective: 

    Setting Clear Boundaries

    Boundaries help you decide what feels respectful and safe. They allow you to limit your exposure to behaviors or environments that drain or overwhelm you. Setting boundaries can mean reducing contact, creating distance, or even ending a relationship, especially in situations that are unsafe or harmful. In these situations, setting boundaries to protect yourself is necessary and healthy.

    Choosing Where to Place Your Energy

    Part of protecting your peace is being honest about what you have the capacity for. It’s the practice of noticing what restores your energy and depletes it, then aligning your choices accordingly.

    You may have heard the phrase “give the same energy you receive.” It can be a helpful reminder to invest in relationships where there is mutual effort. But protecting your peace goes deeper than simply mirroring others. It means choosing to engage in relationships that feel authentic and reciprocal, where emotional labor and care don’t fall on just one person.

    It’s about honoring your limits without withholding connection, and offering your energy where it can genuinely grow, not where it gets drained.

    Creating Calming Routines

    Peace isn’t just about what you avoid. It’s also about what you cultivate. Rituals and habits that calm and recharge you bring stability to your life. Rest, meaningful connection, movement, and grounding or spiritual practices can create a foundation of calm, even when life around you feels chaotic.

    Staying Regulated Around Others

    Learning to stay steady in the presence of someone else’s emotions can be hard, especially if you have people-pleasing tendencies. You can care about people without absorbing their emotions or making their mood your responsibility. Other people have their own feelings, and you are not responsible for fixing them.

    When “Protecting Your Peace” is Really Just Avoidance Behaviors

    Like any wellness phrase, “protect your peace” can get overused or misused. Here’s when it can slip into unhealthy territory:

    • Avoiding hard conversations instead of engaging in repair or conflict management
    • Backing out of responsibilities, even if you have already committed, and labeling it “self-care”
    • Stonewalling or shutting down under the guise of “I’m doing what’s best for me”
    • Checking out emotionally rather than communicating your needs
    • Using it as a catch-all justification for not putting effort into your relationships
    • Using it as an excuse to avoid being held accountable

    When used in these ways, “protecting your peace” can harm the other party involved, and becomes a barrier to growth and healthy connection.

    Communicating Your Needs

    Healthy peace involves communication, not avoidance. You can protect your peace and stay connected and accountable in your relationships by…

    • Speaking up about your needs and limits
    • Using self-soothing practices when you feel triggered
    • Practicing repair instead of stonewalling 
    • Asking for time or space when overwhelmed, and returning to the conversation later

    Is it Healthy Space or Avoidant Distance?

    Healthy stepping back sounds like: 

    • “I need a moment to calm down, and then I want to return to this.” 
    • “I don’t have the capacity for this right now, but I care and we can discuss it later.”
    • “This situation is harmful, and I am choosing to distance myself from it to protect my wellbeing.”

    Avoidance sounds like:

    • Disappearing without communicating
    • Withdrawing permanently from solvable conflict
    • Refusing to engage in repair or understanding
    • Using distance as punishment or control

    Safety disclaimer:  Communication is appropriate only in safe relationships. If you are experiencing domestic violence or abuse, this does not apply. Prioritizing your safety—even through withdrawal, distance or disappearing—is appropriate and justified.

    Here are a few questions to ask yourself to gauge whether or not you are protecting yourself, or simply avoiding hard situations. 

    1. Am I stepping back to feel safer and more regulated, or to avoid discomfort that we could work through?
    2. Am I creating space to care for myself, or am I withdrawing in a way that prevents honest communication and growth?
    3. Does this pause reflect my values and goals I may have for this relationship, or is it an action I might regret later?
    4. Have I communicated what I need and, if possible, when I can re-engage?
    5. Is there a small piece of accountability or repair I can still offer, even if I need space right now?
    6. Will this choice help protect trust and connection over time?

    The Balancing Act: Caring for Yourself and Caring for Your Relationships

    Protecting your peace doesn’t mean checking out entirely. It’s not an escape from responsibility or discomfort. It’s a balance: honoring your own needs while still showing up for people who matter.

    There’s a saying: “If you want a village, you’ve got to actually be a villager.” You’re not always going to feel like showing up, but if you want support, you also have to be someone others can rely on. 

    Protecting your peace doesn’t cancel out the importance of following through on commitments or being someone others can depend on, even when it takes effort. But it does mean choosing where to place your energy and communicating honestly when you need to set a boundary or remove yourself from a situation.

    The healthiest version of protecting your peace means taking care of yourself in ways that help you stay present and show up as your best self in all aspects of your life.

    Alex Spangler

    Source link

  • Brigitte Bardot, 1960s film icon turned animal rights activist, dies at 91

    Brigitte Bardot, the French 1960s sex symbol who became one of the greatest screen sirens of the 20th century and later an animal rights activist, has died. She was 91.Bruno Jacquelin, of the Brigitte Bardot Foundation for the protection of animals, told The Associated Press that she died Sunday at her home in southern France, and would not provide a cause of death. He said no arrangements have yet been made for funeral or memorial services. She had been hospitalized last month.Bardot became an international celebrity as a sexualized teen bride in the 1956 movie “And God Created Woman.” Directed by her then-husband, Roger Vadim, it triggered a scandal with scenes of the long-legged beauty dancing on tables naked.At the height of a cinema career that spanned some 28 films and three marriages, Bardot came to symbolize a nation bursting out of bourgeois respectability. Her tousled, blonde hair, figure and pouty irreverence made her one of France’s best-known stars.Such was her widespread appeal that in 1969 her features were chosen to be the model for “Marianne,” the national emblem of France and the official Gallic seal. Bardot’s face appeared on statues, postage stamps and even on coins.‘’We are mourning a legend,” French President Emmanuel Macron wrote Sunday on X.Bardot’s second career as an animal rights activist was equally sensational. She traveled to the Arctic to blow the whistle on the slaughter of baby seals; she condemned the use of animals in laboratory experiments; and she opposed sending monkeys into space.”Man is an insatiable predator,” Bardot told The Associated Press on her 73rd birthday, in 2007. “I don’t care about my past glory. That means nothing in the face of an animal that suffers, since it has no power, no words to defend itself.”Her activism earned her compatriots’ respect and, in 1985, she was awarded the Legion of Honor, the nation’s highest honor. Later, however, she fell from public grace as her far-right political views sounded racist, as she frequently decried the influx of immigrants into France, especially Muslims.She was convicted five times in French courts of inciting racial hatred. Notably, she criticized the Muslim practice of slaughtering sheep during annual religious holidays like Eid al-Adha.Bardot’s 1992 marriage to fourth husband Bernard d’Ormale, a onetime adviser to former National Front leader Jean-Marie Le Pen, contributed to her political shift. She described the outspoken nationalist as a “lovely, intelligent man.”In 2012, she caused controversy again when she wrote a letter in support of Marine Le Pen, the current leader of the party — now renamed National Rally — in her failed bid for the French presidency. In 2018, at the height of the #MeToo movement, Bardot said in an interview that most actors protesting sexual harassment in the film industry were “hypocritical” and “ridiculous” because many played “the teases” with producers to land parts.She said she had never been a victim of sexual harassment and found it “charming to be told that I was beautiful or that I had a nice little ass.” Brigitte Anne-Marie Bardot was born Sept. 28, 1934, to a wealthy industrialist. A shy, secretive child, she studied classical ballet and was discovered by a family friend who put her on the cover of Elle magazine at age 14.Bardot once described her childhood as “difficult” and said her father was a strict disciplinarian.But it was French movie producer Vadim, whom she married in 1952, who saw her potential and wrote “And God Created Woman” to showcase provocative sensuality.The film, which portrayed Bardot as a bored newlywed who beds her brother-in-law, had a decisive influence on New Wave directors Jean-Luc Godard and Francois Truffaut, and came to embody the hedonism and sexual freedom of the 1960s.The film was a box-office hit, and it made Bardot a superstar. Her girlish pout, tiny waist and shape were often more appreciated than her talent.”It’s an embarrassment to have acted so badly,” Bardot said of her early films. “I suffered a lot in the beginning. I was really treated like someone less than nothing.”Bardot’s unabashed, off-screen love affair with co-star Jean-Louis Trintignant further shocked the nation. It eradicated the boundaries between her public and private life and turned her into a hot prize for paparazzi.Bardot never adjusted to the limelight. She blamed the constant press attention for the suicide attempt that followed 10 months after the birth of her only child, Nicolas. Photographers had broken into her house only two weeks before she gave birth to snap a picture of her pregnant.Nicolas’ father was Jacques Charrier, a handsome French actor whom she married in 1959 but who never felt comfortable in his role as Monsieur Bardot. Bardot soon gave up her son to his father, and later said she had been chronically depressed and unready for the duties of being a mother.”I was looking for roots then,” she said in an interview. “I had none to offer.”In her 1996 autobiography “Initiales B.B.,” she likened her pregnancy to “a tumor growing inside me,” and described Charrier as “temperamental and abusive.”Bardot married her third husband, West German millionaire playboy Gunther Sachs, in 1966, but the relationship ended in divorce three years later.Among her films were “A Parisian” (1957); “In Case of Misfortune,” in which she starred in 1958 with screen legend Jean Gabin; “The Truth” (1960); “Private Life” (1962); “A Ravishing Idiot” (1964); “Shalako” (1968); “Women” (1969); “The Bear and the Doll” (1970); “Rum Boulevard” (1971); and “Don Juan” (1973).With the exception of 1963’s critically acclaimed “Contempt,” directed by Godard, Bardot’s films were rarely complicated by plots. Often they were vehicles to display Bardot’s curves and legs in scanty dresses or frolicking nude in the sun.”It was never a great passion of mine,” she said of filmmaking. “And it can be deadly sometimes. Marilyn (Monroe) perished because of it.”Bardot retired to her Riviera villa in St. Tropez at the age of 39 in 1973 after “The Woman Grabber.” She emerged a decade later with a new persona: An animal rights lobbyist. She abandoned her jet-set life and sold off movie memorabilia and jewelry to create a foundation devoted to the prevention of animal cruelty.Her activism knew no borders. She urged South Korea to ban the sale of dog meat and once wrote to U.S. President Bill Clinton asking why the U.S. Navy recaptured two dolphins it had released into the wild.She attacked centuries-old French and Italian sporting traditions including the Palio, a free-for-all horse race, and campaigned on behalf of wolves, rabbits, kittens and turtle doves.By the late 1990s, Bardot was making headlines that would lose her many fans. She was convicted and fined five times between 1997 and 2008 for inciting racial hatred in incidents inspired by her anger at Muslim animal slaughtering rituals.”It’s true that sometimes I get carried away, but when I see how slowly things move forward … and despite all the promises that have been made to me by all different governments put together — my distress takes over,” Bardot told the AP.In 1997, several towns removed Bardot-inspired statues of Marianne — the bare-breasted statue representing the French Republic — after the actress voiced anti-immigrant sentiment. Also that year, she received death threats after calling for a ban on the sale of horse meat.Environmental campaigner Paul Watson, who was beaten on a seal hunt protest in Canada alongside Bardot in 1977 and campaigned with her for five decades, acknowledged that “many disagreed with Brigitte’s politics or some of her views.”“Her allegiance was not to the world of humans,” he said. “The animals of this world lost a wonderful friend today.”Bardot once said that she identified with the animals that she was trying to save.”I can understand hunted animals because of the way I was treated,” Bardot said. “What happened to me was inhuman. I was constantly surrounded by the world press.” Ganley contributed to this story before her retirement. Angela Charlton in Paris contributed to this report.

    PARIS —

    Brigitte Bardot, the French 1960s sex symbol who became one of the greatest screen sirens of the 20th century and later an animal rights activist, has died. She was 91.

    Bruno Jacquelin, of the Brigitte Bardot Foundation for the protection of animals, told The Associated Press that she died Sunday at her home in southern France, and would not provide a cause of death. He said no arrangements have yet been made for funeral or memorial services. She had been hospitalized last month.

    Bardot became an international celebrity as a sexualized teen bride in the 1956 movie “And God Created Woman.” Directed by her then-husband, Roger Vadim, it triggered a scandal with scenes of the long-legged beauty dancing on tables naked.

    At the height of a cinema career that spanned some 28 films and three marriages, Bardot came to symbolize a nation bursting out of bourgeois respectability. Her tousled, blonde hair, figure and pouty irreverence made her one of France’s best-known stars.

    Such was her widespread appeal that in 1969 her features were chosen to be the model for “Marianne,” the national emblem of France and the official Gallic seal. Bardot’s face appeared on statues, postage stamps and even on coins.

    ‘’We are mourning a legend,” French President Emmanuel Macron wrote Sunday on X.

    Bardot’s second career as an animal rights activist was equally sensational. She traveled to the Arctic to blow the whistle on the slaughter of baby seals; she condemned the use of animals in laboratory experiments; and she opposed sending monkeys into space.

    “Man is an insatiable predator,” Bardot told The Associated Press on her 73rd birthday, in 2007. “I don’t care about my past glory. That means nothing in the face of an animal that suffers, since it has no power, no words to defend itself.”

    Her activism earned her compatriots’ respect and, in 1985, she was awarded the Legion of Honor, the nation’s highest honor.

    Later, however, she fell from public grace as her far-right political views sounded racist, as she frequently decried the influx of immigrants into France, especially Muslims.

    She was convicted five times in French courts of inciting racial hatred. Notably, she criticized the Muslim practice of slaughtering sheep during annual religious holidays like Eid al-Adha.

    Bardot’s 1992 marriage to fourth husband Bernard d’Ormale, a onetime adviser to former National Front leader Jean-Marie Le Pen, contributed to her political shift. She described the outspoken nationalist as a “lovely, intelligent man.”

    In 2012, she caused controversy again when she wrote a letter in support of Marine Le Pen, the current leader of the party — now renamed National Rally — in her failed bid for the French presidency.

    In 2018, at the height of the #MeToo movement, Bardot said in an interview that most actors protesting sexual harassment in the film industry were “hypocritical” and “ridiculous” because many played “the teases” with producers to land parts.

    She said she had never been a victim of sexual harassment and found it “charming to be told that I was beautiful or that I had a nice little ass.”

    Brigitte Anne-Marie Bardot was born Sept. 28, 1934, to a wealthy industrialist. A shy, secretive child, she studied classical ballet and was discovered by a family friend who put her on the cover of Elle magazine at age 14.

    Bardot once described her childhood as “difficult” and said her father was a strict disciplinarian.

    But it was French movie producer Vadim, whom she married in 1952, who saw her potential and wrote “And God Created Woman” to showcase provocative sensuality.

    The film, which portrayed Bardot as a bored newlywed who beds her brother-in-law, had a decisive influence on New Wave directors Jean-Luc Godard and Francois Truffaut, and came to embody the hedonism and sexual freedom of the 1960s.

    The film was a box-office hit, and it made Bardot a superstar. Her girlish pout, tiny waist and shape were often more appreciated than her talent.

    “It’s an embarrassment to have acted so badly,” Bardot said of her early films. “I suffered a lot in the beginning. I was really treated like someone less than nothing.”

    Bardot’s unabashed, off-screen love affair with co-star Jean-Louis Trintignant further shocked the nation. It eradicated the boundaries between her public and private life and turned her into a hot prize for paparazzi.

    Bardot never adjusted to the limelight. She blamed the constant press attention for the suicide attempt that followed 10 months after the birth of her only child, Nicolas. Photographers had broken into her house only two weeks before she gave birth to snap a picture of her pregnant.

    Nicolas’ father was Jacques Charrier, a handsome French actor whom she married in 1959 but who never felt comfortable in his role as Monsieur Bardot. Bardot soon gave up her son to his father, and later said she had been chronically depressed and unready for the duties of being a mother.

    “I was looking for roots then,” she said in an interview. “I had none to offer.”

    In her 1996 autobiography “Initiales B.B.,” she likened her pregnancy to “a tumor growing inside me,” and described Charrier as “temperamental and abusive.”

    Bardot married her third husband, West German millionaire playboy Gunther Sachs, in 1966, but the relationship ended in divorce three years later.

    Among her films were “A Parisian” (1957); “In Case of Misfortune,” in which she starred in 1958 with screen legend Jean Gabin; “The Truth” (1960); “Private Life” (1962); “A Ravishing Idiot” (1964); “Shalako” (1968); “Women” (1969); “The Bear and the Doll” (1970); “Rum Boulevard” (1971); and “Don Juan” (1973).

    With the exception of 1963’s critically acclaimed “Contempt,” directed by Godard, Bardot’s films were rarely complicated by plots. Often they were vehicles to display Bardot’s curves and legs in scanty dresses or frolicking nude in the sun.

    “It was never a great passion of mine,” she said of filmmaking. “And it can be deadly sometimes. Marilyn (Monroe) perished because of it.”

    Bardot retired to her Riviera villa in St. Tropez at the age of 39 in 1973 after “The Woman Grabber.”

    She emerged a decade later with a new persona: An animal rights lobbyist. She abandoned her jet-set life and sold off movie memorabilia and jewelry to create a foundation devoted to the prevention of animal cruelty.

    Her activism knew no borders. She urged South Korea to ban the sale of dog meat and once wrote to U.S. President Bill Clinton asking why the U.S. Navy recaptured two dolphins it had released into the wild.

    She attacked centuries-old French and Italian sporting traditions including the Palio, a free-for-all horse race, and campaigned on behalf of wolves, rabbits, kittens and turtle doves.

    By the late 1990s, Bardot was making headlines that would lose her many fans. She was convicted and fined five times between 1997 and 2008 for inciting racial hatred in incidents inspired by her anger at Muslim animal slaughtering rituals.

    “It’s true that sometimes I get carried away, but when I see how slowly things move forward … and despite all the promises that have been made to me by all different governments put together — my distress takes over,” Bardot told the AP.

    In 1997, several towns removed Bardot-inspired statues of Marianne — the bare-breasted statue representing the French Republic — after the actress voiced anti-immigrant sentiment. Also that year, she received death threats after calling for a ban on the sale of horse meat.

    Environmental campaigner Paul Watson, who was beaten on a seal hunt protest in Canada alongside Bardot in 1977 and campaigned with her for five decades, acknowledged that “many disagreed with Brigitte’s politics or some of her views.”

    “Her allegiance was not to the world of humans,” he said. “The animals of this world lost a wonderful friend today.”

    Bardot once said that she identified with the animals that she was trying to save.

    “I can understand hunted animals because of the way I was treated,” Bardot said. “What happened to me was inhuman. I was constantly surrounded by the world press.”

    Ganley contributed to this story before her retirement. Angela Charlton in Paris contributed to this report.

    Source link

  • Brigitte Bardot, 1960s film icon turned animal rights activist, dies at 91

    Brigitte Bardot, the French 1960s sex symbol who became one of the greatest screen sirens of the 20th century and later an animal rights activist, has died. She was 91.Bruno Jacquelin, of the Brigitte Bardot Foundation for the protection of animals, told The Associated Press that she died Sunday at her home in southern France, and would not provide a cause of death. He said no arrangements have yet been made for funeral or memorial services. She had been hospitalized last month.Bardot became an international celebrity as a sexualized teen bride in the 1956 movie “And God Created Woman.” Directed by her then-husband, Roger Vadim, it triggered a scandal with scenes of the long-legged beauty dancing on tables naked.At the height of a cinema career that spanned some 28 films and three marriages, Bardot came to symbolize a nation bursting out of bourgeois respectability. Her tousled, blonde hair, figure and pouty irreverence made her one of France’s best-known stars.Such was her widespread appeal that in 1969 her features were chosen to be the model for “Marianne,” the national emblem of France and the official Gallic seal. Bardot’s face appeared on statues, postage stamps and even on coins.‘’We are mourning a legend,” French President Emmanuel Macron wrote Sunday on X.Bardot’s second career as an animal rights activist was equally sensational. She traveled to the Arctic to blow the whistle on the slaughter of baby seals; she condemned the use of animals in laboratory experiments; and she opposed sending monkeys into space.”Man is an insatiable predator,” Bardot told The Associated Press on her 73rd birthday, in 2007. “I don’t care about my past glory. That means nothing in the face of an animal that suffers, since it has no power, no words to defend itself.”Her activism earned her compatriots’ respect and, in 1985, she was awarded the Legion of Honor, the nation’s highest honor. Later, however, she fell from public grace as her far-right political views sounded racist, as she frequently decried the influx of immigrants into France, especially Muslims.She was convicted five times in French courts of inciting racial hatred. Notably, she criticized the Muslim practice of slaughtering sheep during annual religious holidays like Eid al-Adha.Bardot’s 1992 marriage to fourth husband Bernard d’Ormale, a onetime adviser to former National Front leader Jean-Marie Le Pen, contributed to her political shift. She described the outspoken nationalist as a “lovely, intelligent man.”In 2012, she caused controversy again when she wrote a letter in support of Marine Le Pen, the current leader of the party — now renamed National Rally — in her failed bid for the French presidency. In 2018, at the height of the #MeToo movement, Bardot said in an interview that most actors protesting sexual harassment in the film industry were “hypocritical” and “ridiculous” because many played “the teases” with producers to land parts.She said she had never been a victim of sexual harassment and found it “charming to be told that I was beautiful or that I had a nice little ass.” Brigitte Anne-Marie Bardot was born Sept. 28, 1934, to a wealthy industrialist. A shy, secretive child, she studied classical ballet and was discovered by a family friend who put her on the cover of Elle magazine at age 14.Bardot once described her childhood as “difficult” and said her father was a strict disciplinarian.But it was French movie producer Vadim, whom she married in 1952, who saw her potential and wrote “And God Created Woman” to showcase provocative sensuality.The film, which portrayed Bardot as a bored newlywed who beds her brother-in-law, had a decisive influence on New Wave directors Jean-Luc Godard and Francois Truffaut, and came to embody the hedonism and sexual freedom of the 1960s.The film was a box-office hit, and it made Bardot a superstar. Her girlish pout, tiny waist and shape were often more appreciated than her talent.”It’s an embarrassment to have acted so badly,” Bardot said of her early films. “I suffered a lot in the beginning. I was really treated like someone less than nothing.”Bardot’s unabashed, off-screen love affair with co-star Jean-Louis Trintignant further shocked the nation. It eradicated the boundaries between her public and private life and turned her into a hot prize for paparazzi.Bardot never adjusted to the limelight. She blamed the constant press attention for the suicide attempt that followed 10 months after the birth of her only child, Nicolas. Photographers had broken into her house only two weeks before she gave birth to snap a picture of her pregnant.Nicolas’ father was Jacques Charrier, a handsome French actor whom she married in 1959 but who never felt comfortable in his role as Monsieur Bardot. Bardot soon gave up her son to his father, and later said she had been chronically depressed and unready for the duties of being a mother.”I was looking for roots then,” she said in an interview. “I had none to offer.”In her 1996 autobiography “Initiales B.B.,” she likened her pregnancy to “a tumor growing inside me,” and described Charrier as “temperamental and abusive.”Bardot married her third husband, West German millionaire playboy Gunther Sachs, in 1966, but the relationship ended in divorce three years later.Among her films were “A Parisian” (1957); “In Case of Misfortune,” in which she starred in 1958 with screen legend Jean Gabin; “The Truth” (1960); “Private Life” (1962); “A Ravishing Idiot” (1964); “Shalako” (1968); “Women” (1969); “The Bear and the Doll” (1970); “Rum Boulevard” (1971); and “Don Juan” (1973).With the exception of 1963’s critically acclaimed “Contempt,” directed by Godard, Bardot’s films were rarely complicated by plots. Often they were vehicles to display Bardot’s curves and legs in scanty dresses or frolicking nude in the sun.”It was never a great passion of mine,” she said of filmmaking. “And it can be deadly sometimes. Marilyn (Monroe) perished because of it.”Bardot retired to her Riviera villa in St. Tropez at the age of 39 in 1973 after “The Woman Grabber.” She emerged a decade later with a new persona: An animal rights lobbyist. She abandoned her jet-set life and sold off movie memorabilia and jewelry to create a foundation devoted to the prevention of animal cruelty.Her activism knew no borders. She urged South Korea to ban the sale of dog meat and once wrote to U.S. President Bill Clinton asking why the U.S. Navy recaptured two dolphins it had released into the wild.She attacked centuries-old French and Italian sporting traditions including the Palio, a free-for-all horse race, and campaigned on behalf of wolves, rabbits, kittens and turtle doves.By the late 1990s, Bardot was making headlines that would lose her many fans. She was convicted and fined five times between 1997 and 2008 for inciting racial hatred in incidents inspired by her anger at Muslim animal slaughtering rituals.”It’s true that sometimes I get carried away, but when I see how slowly things move forward … and despite all the promises that have been made to me by all different governments put together — my distress takes over,” Bardot told the AP.In 1997, several towns removed Bardot-inspired statues of Marianne — the bare-breasted statue representing the French Republic — after the actress voiced anti-immigrant sentiment. Also that year, she received death threats after calling for a ban on the sale of horse meat.Environmental campaigner Paul Watson, who was beaten on a seal hunt protest in Canada alongside Bardot in 1977 and campaigned with her for five decades, acknowledged that “many disagreed with Brigitte’s politics or some of her views.”“Her allegiance was not to the world of humans,” he said. “The animals of this world lost a wonderful friend today.”Bardot once said that she identified with the animals that she was trying to save.”I can understand hunted animals because of the way I was treated,” Bardot said. “What happened to me was inhuman. I was constantly surrounded by the world press.” Ganley contributed to this story before her retirement. Angela Charlton in Paris contributed to this report.

    PARIS —

    Brigitte Bardot, the French 1960s sex symbol who became one of the greatest screen sirens of the 20th century and later an animal rights activist, has died. She was 91.

    Bruno Jacquelin, of the Brigitte Bardot Foundation for the protection of animals, told The Associated Press that she died Sunday at her home in southern France, and would not provide a cause of death. He said no arrangements have yet been made for funeral or memorial services. She had been hospitalized last month.

    Bardot became an international celebrity as a sexualized teen bride in the 1956 movie “And God Created Woman.” Directed by her then-husband, Roger Vadim, it triggered a scandal with scenes of the long-legged beauty dancing on tables naked.

    At the height of a cinema career that spanned some 28 films and three marriages, Bardot came to symbolize a nation bursting out of bourgeois respectability. Her tousled, blonde hair, figure and pouty irreverence made her one of France’s best-known stars.

    Such was her widespread appeal that in 1969 her features were chosen to be the model for “Marianne,” the national emblem of France and the official Gallic seal. Bardot’s face appeared on statues, postage stamps and even on coins.

    ‘’We are mourning a legend,” French President Emmanuel Macron wrote Sunday on X.

    Bardot’s second career as an animal rights activist was equally sensational. She traveled to the Arctic to blow the whistle on the slaughter of baby seals; she condemned the use of animals in laboratory experiments; and she opposed sending monkeys into space.

    “Man is an insatiable predator,” Bardot told The Associated Press on her 73rd birthday, in 2007. “I don’t care about my past glory. That means nothing in the face of an animal that suffers, since it has no power, no words to defend itself.”

    Her activism earned her compatriots’ respect and, in 1985, she was awarded the Legion of Honor, the nation’s highest honor.

    Later, however, she fell from public grace as her far-right political views sounded racist, as she frequently decried the influx of immigrants into France, especially Muslims.

    She was convicted five times in French courts of inciting racial hatred. Notably, she criticized the Muslim practice of slaughtering sheep during annual religious holidays like Eid al-Adha.

    Bardot’s 1992 marriage to fourth husband Bernard d’Ormale, a onetime adviser to former National Front leader Jean-Marie Le Pen, contributed to her political shift. She described the outspoken nationalist as a “lovely, intelligent man.”

    In 2012, she caused controversy again when she wrote a letter in support of Marine Le Pen, the current leader of the party — now renamed National Rally — in her failed bid for the French presidency.

    In 2018, at the height of the #MeToo movement, Bardot said in an interview that most actors protesting sexual harassment in the film industry were “hypocritical” and “ridiculous” because many played “the teases” with producers to land parts.

    She said she had never been a victim of sexual harassment and found it “charming to be told that I was beautiful or that I had a nice little ass.”

    Brigitte Anne-Marie Bardot was born Sept. 28, 1934, to a wealthy industrialist. A shy, secretive child, she studied classical ballet and was discovered by a family friend who put her on the cover of Elle magazine at age 14.

    Bardot once described her childhood as “difficult” and said her father was a strict disciplinarian.

    But it was French movie producer Vadim, whom she married in 1952, who saw her potential and wrote “And God Created Woman” to showcase provocative sensuality.

    The film, which portrayed Bardot as a bored newlywed who beds her brother-in-law, had a decisive influence on New Wave directors Jean-Luc Godard and Francois Truffaut, and came to embody the hedonism and sexual freedom of the 1960s.

    The film was a box-office hit, and it made Bardot a superstar. Her girlish pout, tiny waist and shape were often more appreciated than her talent.

    “It’s an embarrassment to have acted so badly,” Bardot said of her early films. “I suffered a lot in the beginning. I was really treated like someone less than nothing.”

    Bardot’s unabashed, off-screen love affair with co-star Jean-Louis Trintignant further shocked the nation. It eradicated the boundaries between her public and private life and turned her into a hot prize for paparazzi.

    Bardot never adjusted to the limelight. She blamed the constant press attention for the suicide attempt that followed 10 months after the birth of her only child, Nicolas. Photographers had broken into her house only two weeks before she gave birth to snap a picture of her pregnant.

    Nicolas’ father was Jacques Charrier, a handsome French actor whom she married in 1959 but who never felt comfortable in his role as Monsieur Bardot. Bardot soon gave up her son to his father, and later said she had been chronically depressed and unready for the duties of being a mother.

    “I was looking for roots then,” she said in an interview. “I had none to offer.”

    In her 1996 autobiography “Initiales B.B.,” she likened her pregnancy to “a tumor growing inside me,” and described Charrier as “temperamental and abusive.”

    Bardot married her third husband, West German millionaire playboy Gunther Sachs, in 1966, but the relationship ended in divorce three years later.

    Among her films were “A Parisian” (1957); “In Case of Misfortune,” in which she starred in 1958 with screen legend Jean Gabin; “The Truth” (1960); “Private Life” (1962); “A Ravishing Idiot” (1964); “Shalako” (1968); “Women” (1969); “The Bear and the Doll” (1970); “Rum Boulevard” (1971); and “Don Juan” (1973).

    With the exception of 1963’s critically acclaimed “Contempt,” directed by Godard, Bardot’s films were rarely complicated by plots. Often they were vehicles to display Bardot’s curves and legs in scanty dresses or frolicking nude in the sun.

    “It was never a great passion of mine,” she said of filmmaking. “And it can be deadly sometimes. Marilyn (Monroe) perished because of it.”

    Bardot retired to her Riviera villa in St. Tropez at the age of 39 in 1973 after “The Woman Grabber.”

    She emerged a decade later with a new persona: An animal rights lobbyist. She abandoned her jet-set life and sold off movie memorabilia and jewelry to create a foundation devoted to the prevention of animal cruelty.

    Her activism knew no borders. She urged South Korea to ban the sale of dog meat and once wrote to U.S. President Bill Clinton asking why the U.S. Navy recaptured two dolphins it had released into the wild.

    She attacked centuries-old French and Italian sporting traditions including the Palio, a free-for-all horse race, and campaigned on behalf of wolves, rabbits, kittens and turtle doves.

    By the late 1990s, Bardot was making headlines that would lose her many fans. She was convicted and fined five times between 1997 and 2008 for inciting racial hatred in incidents inspired by her anger at Muslim animal slaughtering rituals.

    “It’s true that sometimes I get carried away, but when I see how slowly things move forward … and despite all the promises that have been made to me by all different governments put together — my distress takes over,” Bardot told the AP.

    In 1997, several towns removed Bardot-inspired statues of Marianne — the bare-breasted statue representing the French Republic — after the actress voiced anti-immigrant sentiment. Also that year, she received death threats after calling for a ban on the sale of horse meat.

    Environmental campaigner Paul Watson, who was beaten on a seal hunt protest in Canada alongside Bardot in 1977 and campaigned with her for five decades, acknowledged that “many disagreed with Brigitte’s politics or some of her views.”

    “Her allegiance was not to the world of humans,” he said. “The animals of this world lost a wonderful friend today.”

    Bardot once said that she identified with the animals that she was trying to save.

    “I can understand hunted animals because of the way I was treated,” Bardot said. “What happened to me was inhuman. I was constantly surrounded by the world press.”

    Ganley contributed to this story before her retirement. Angela Charlton in Paris contributed to this report.

    Source link

  • 7 Signs A Relationship Can’t Be Fixed, From A Therapist

    Any relationship that we are in long term goes through seasons, especially if we are committed to another person and have invested our time, love, and energy into the relationship. No relationship is perfect, despite how much we romanticize them. Even the most satisfying of relationships need conscious attention and nurturing to ensure health and growth.

    Source link

  • Capricorn Compatibility: How They Match Up With All 12 Signs

    And considering their ruling planets have completely different priorities, it’s not unlikely that Libra and Capricorn will have different motivations, interests, and even love languages. After all, Libras are fun-loving and pleasure-seeking, prioritizing beauty and harmony with their Venusian influence. Capricorns, on the other hand, take themselves pretty seriously and only prioritize pleasure when all their work is done, which by a Cap’s standards, is never.

    Source link

  • Georgia woman asks man to reach item on top shelf at Kroger. Then his wife intervenes. And just like that, she becomes the ‘Kroger lady’

    A woman has gone viral after her Kroger-based rant didn’t land exactly as she expected it to. In the clip, which has amassed 1.3 million views, Keiosha (@keiosha016) shops in Kroger alongside her husband and baby.

    “You would not believe the audacity some people have,” she begins.

    The TikToker then explains how she was shopping with her husband when a woman asked him to reach something for her from the top shelf.

    “I look at them. I look at him. He looks at me. He said, ‘Boo!’ The fact that he knew he needed permission, and the fact that they thought they could just ask him, and he was gonna move for them, the audacity,” she said.

    Keiosha continued, “If you are in the store, married or single by yourself, and you need help, and you notice that the man that you got to ask help from is with a woman, he correct thing to say is, ‘Excuse me, ma’am, is it OK if your husband can help me get something from the shelf?””

    She then claimed that, by asking him, the shopper put her husband in a “weird situation.”

    “He didn’t flinch, he didn’t move. He looked at me, ‘Boo,’ and we both knew what that ‘Boo’ meant, so… But have a good day,” she said.

    @keiosha016

    Ask the wife!

    ♬ original sound – Queenbee016

    However, commenters didn’t agree with the TikToker’s approach.

    “Both of yall goofy!” one wrote. “And you bored. This the highlight of your goofy ass day.”

    “May my self-esteem never get this low,” another added. While a third quipped: “You definitely pay every bill.”

    A fourth remarked that “this level of insecurity is so unhealthy,” while a fifth concurred: “He was scared because he know you insecure.”

    Elsewhere, a sixth asked whether it’s “really that serious,” to which Keiosha replied, “It may not be to some, but to us…. it’s EVERYTHING! We respect each other and create boundaries for others.”

    Several other commenters also mocked Keiosha and her husband’s appearance.

    Keiosha didn’t immediately respond to The Mary Sue’s request for comment via TikTok comment.

    Other TikTokers shared their takes

    Keiosha soon became immortalized as the ‘Kroger lady,’ with several TikTokers stitching or otherwise posting their hot takes on her situation.

    “I pray that I never be or become that insecure,” TikToker Danni (@dannirokz) said. “If I’m with my husband in a store and somebody comes up and says, ‘Oh, can you reach that?’ He doesn’t got to look at me Good. That’s the kind of man I know he is. I know he’s gonna help. You know, you need to reach it. Like, that’s fine. That’s the kind of man he was raised to be.”

    “If his mama found out he didn’t help and it was that, it would be a problem. No,” they continued. “But you thought people were gonna agree with you. And now they’re chewing you up. And, you know? I’m kind of with them.”

    In her own video, fellow TikTok user Candi (@candi3_commentary) added, “Lady, you know how goddamn insecure you have to be? Nobody wants your man but you: it’s a box of cereal. It’s just like a given rule that when someone is taller, they assist people. It’s just called being. A nice person. It has nothing to do with wanting your man. Y’all gotta stop.”

    Some defend her

    However, not all TikTokers disagreed with Keiosha. Some, like Hailey (@haileystel), adopted a middle ground.

    “All I know is that, if I’m in the grocery store with my man, and someone taps me on the shoulder and says, ‘Ma’am, is it OK if your man helps me get something off that top shelf?’ Why the [expletive] are you asking me? You don’t see this grown-[expletive] man standing right next to me? Do I look like his mother? His caregiver? His timekeeper? No. I barely know that I’m at a grocery store, OK? I blindly follow wherever that man leads.”

    “If you do ask my man, and he declines and says that he cannot help you, we still gonna have a problem,” she added. “Because why are you not helping this lady get something off the higher shelf at the grocery store?”

    However, at the same time, she noted how “that man knew that if he did not acknowledge his wife when that lady acknowledged him, that it was going to be a problem. He knows his wife. He knows the boundaries that she has and that’s OK.”

    Danni, Candi, and Hailey didn’t immediately respond to The Mary Sue’s request for comment via TikTok comment.

    Have a tip we should know? [email protected]

    Image of Charlotte Colombo

    Charlotte Colombo

    Charlotte is an internet culture writer with bylines in Insider, VICE, Glamour, The Independent, and more. She holds a Master’s degree in Magazine Journalism from City St George’s, University of London.

    Charlotte Colombo

    Source link

  • America Needs More Husband Material | RealClearPolitics

    America Needs More Husband Material

    William Galston, Wall Street Journal

    Source link

  • Venus Williams weds Andrea Preti as part of 5-day celebration of their union

    FILE – Andrea Preti, left, and Venus Williams attend the CFDA Fashion Awards, hosted by The Council of Fashion Designers of America, at The American Museum of Natural History on Monday, Nov. 3, 2025, in New York. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP, File)

    The Associated Press

    Source link

  • Who do you celebrate Christmas with? Marriage counselor’s advice to new couples making holiday plans – WTOP News

    Rachel Dack, a licensed clinical professional relationship counselor based in Bethesda, Maryland said it starts with communication with your partner about what the ideal holiday season looks like.

    Many new couples face a challenge in the holiday season — figuring out how to split time between their own family and their partner’s.

    Rachel Dack, a licensed clinical professional relationship counselor based in Bethesda, Maryland, said it starts with communication with your partner about what the ideal holiday season looks like.

    “Think about your relationship or your marriage as a clean slate, and then try to integrate whatever you want to bring in, and then also develop new holiday traditions as a couple,” Dack said.

    That could look like merging past traditions and coming up with new ones.

    “Digging deep and reflecting around what are your own values and what’s the meaning that you want to give to the holidays as a couple,” she said.

    Even if there’s pressure from your families, she said to try to stay on the same page.

    “Without sounding totally cold, and only coming from a place of being completely realistic, you are not responsible for everyone else’s feelings or holiday joy,” Dack said. “It’s going to be impossible to please everybody.”

    Depending on the couple’s circumstances, hitting two homes in one day could do the trick, or rotating celebrations of Thanksgiving and winter holidays between sides of the family.

    “If somebody is trying to keep score down to the second, that’s not going to work for anybody,” Dack said.

    But sometimes, it could mean celebrating just the two of you.

    “There’s a difference between spending time with your family or your partner’s family because it’s important to you and to each other, and not just doing that because it’s what’s been done before or it’s important to your extended family,” she said.

    Outside of geographical constraints, Dack said to think about family dynamics, such as divorces, deaths or other factors that could play into holiday plans. When opening a conversation with your partner about holiday plans, she said to avoid talking negatively about their family.

    “If you feel like the conversation is getting tense or your partner’s not listening or being defensive, then I think it’s important to acknowledge that for both of you, there’s compromise that goes into this, and it’s not going to look the same,” she said.

    Whatever game plan is strategized, Dack said you should handle telling your own parents.

    “It’s easy for families to paint the partner as the bad guy,” Dack said.

    And when you break the news, she said to have a delicate and loving conversation with your family.

    “Also validate that it’s hard for your parents not to see you on a certain holiday that you’ve always been together,” she said.

    She recommended sharing your holiday plans well in advance.

    “Don’t keep everybody hanging and feeling anxious to the last minute,” Dack said. “Make the plans in advance. If you’re going to travel, where are you going to stay? How long are you staying?”

    It’s also normal to have growing pains when spending the holiday away from home.

    “As excited as you are to spend a holiday with a partner, and a partner’s family, you might feel kind of sad about missing it with your own family,” she said. “Just know that that’s OK. But if you can focus on each other and making these new memories and shared experiences with your partner, I think it will also feel better.”

    Get breaking news and daily headlines delivered to your email inbox by signing up here.

    © 2025 WTOP. All Rights Reserved. This website is not intended for users located within the European Economic Area.

    Jessica Kronzer

    Source link