Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
This column originally published on Nov. 26, 2014.
Thanksgiving comes around once a year, but what if we adopted the mindset that every day was Thanksgiving and were intentional about the people and things in our lives that we’re thankful for?
John Brubaker
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I don’t like my neighbor. He is old, conservative and very loud at times when our kids are sleeping. There are many more reasons, but let’s get into the real topic of this article. I eventually found ways to switch my anger and release it from my body. At some point, I just realized that it is not healthy for myself or for my family. The person who was most frustrated was me, and the other person even didn’t know it. I just realized that this is not the role model that I want to be for my kids, so I started my own journey to fix this. Here are some ways you can do it, too:
This became a real tradition for me! At the end of the week, I wrote a post on social media highlighting all the things that I am grateful for. Especially as entrepreneurs, we so often focus on and stress about things that need to be done, but this allowed me to focus on the real important things — my family, health and the positive relationships around me. Switching your focus from the negative to the positive things in your life should be an integrated habit in your life! By the way, this not only feels very good, but it is also a great way to stay in touch with the people I have positive relationships with because I am tagging them all, and they see my posts!
Related: How to Transform Anger Into Constructive Action
Anger is a natural emotion, but it can also have long-term side effects on our mental and physical health. Some of the short and long-term health problems that have been linked to unmanaged anger include:
Headache
Insomnia
Increased anxiety
Depression
High blood pressure
Skin problems
Heart attack
When I read this list of potential issues for the first time, I just thought, “do I really want to risk any of this because of a neighbor?” So, ask yourself what you’re getting from the situations that make you angry. In most cases, you get nothing.
Oftentimes these strong feelings are coming from past experiences or experiences in our childhood. In my case, I repeated the fifth grade in my school, and it was a very intense experience. I had no real friends and failed in almost all subjects. At that time, I was criticized heavily and struggled when people made fun of me. To some degree, I overcompensated for this and reacted emotionally whenever I had a negative experience with someone (like the neighbor I mentioned earlier).
So, think about where your anger may be coming from and what it may be rooted in. Analyzing and understanding your anger can help you manage it better. I also realized that anger is an important part of our emotional intelligence because it helps us to know when something in our life needs to change.
Related: What Anger Says About You
Are you going to think about this situation in 10 years? Am I going to think about my stupid neighbor in the year 2032? Hell no! Who cares? We have plans to move to a cooler city and take cool trips, so who cares about this old guy? Setting situations in perspective like this helped me to think differently and let go of some of my anger.
If you’re at a point where you feel like your anger is out of control or that it’s putting a real damper on your life and relationships, it would be a good idea to seek professional help. Qualified professionals can help you develop the skills and mindsets you need to manage these emotions.
It’s also important to practice forgiveness as you navigate your anger. I am a big fan of Dr. Wayne Dyer, who has written many best-selling books on psychology. He is also called the father of motivation. His main message in all his books is this idea of forgiving not only other people but also yourself for the things that may have happened as a result of your anger. At the same time, it’s important to embrace the moment and live a life of growth. So, try to forgive anyone who is causing you to be angry, and then move on by focusing on your personal growth.
Related: Seeing Red? 8 Ways to Keep Your Anger in Check
I wouldn’t give my neighbor credit for it, but writing about this situation has helped me in many ways, and it also led to this article. Anger within neighbors is a common thing, and many people can relate to this, so why not share my experience and write about it? Taking the time to write about your experiences can help you feel more in control of your emotions. And sharing your experiences gives you the opportunity to receive (and give) advice, helping you and others feel less alone. Where can you publish and share your own experience?
Find someone you trust with whom you can speak about such experiences. In my case, it is my wife. When we speak about these situations, we find a solution together. Most often, my wife gives me ideas to focus on and execute. So, find someone you can talk with. Speaking with someone else about a struggle is better than thinking about the struggle alone in your head.
Even with the best plan, sometimes old habits come back. Just be gentle with yourself, and remember this is a marathon and not a sprint. It takes time, and maybe you need two or more rounds to work on yourself before it really works out for you.
Just remind yourself always that there is a reason why you feel this strong emotion. Asking the “why” question is critical and helps you to dig deep into your past. Finding the true reason and accepting this helps you to overcome the situation. Focusing on your personal growth will not only make you more self-confident but will also help you grow in your professional relationships.
Yakup Özkardes-Cheung
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Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
This article was originally published on Nov 23, 2017.
No doubt this has been a year of much hardship, change and violence. It seems each time we turn on the news, there is some new tragic mass shooting or act of terror for us to witness and grieve over. We have to be the change we are looking for. As entrepreneurs, leaders and influencers we must take in the seriousness of attitude. Emotions are contagious. Violence creates more violence, as gratitude creates more success, happiness and peace. On this Thanksgiving Holiday weekend, let us start a new movement of trading guns for gratitude. We need to collectively start holding a different mindset on how to solve our problems. Let us recommit to raising our children in a world where they are not terrified of violence, death and dying. Let’s wake them up to love, kindness, and success. To follow twenty famous quotes on gratitude to help jumpstart our mindset.
Sherrie Campbell
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Do you ever think to yourself, “My situation has always been the same — I’m stuck, and I just need to play the cards I’m dealt with”? If you have done this, you are dragging yourself down with a fixed mindset. Alternatively, a growth mindset means that you prosper despite challenges and obstacles because you see them as catalysts for change and don’t see failure as a way to describe yourself.
Events or actions that don’t work out as intended or desired are learning experiences, ways to grow in every facet of your life and a way to further develop your abilities. Your intelligence, talents and, most importantly, wisdom require setbacks to stimulate fundamental transformation and growth.
We’re all familiar with the saying, “No pain, no gain.” However, Arnold Schwarzenegger took that comparison to a new level when he likened the pain of training with the feelings that arise from sex. What if we look at life’s pain and difficulties as training to help us improve, with all outcomes as positive? We’d embrace the pain as today’s challenge and remember the feeling we have when they are surmounted. We wouldn’t be discouraged or give up when faced with problems; we would expect obstacles and challenges as normal.
Why not give up? Because anything is possible with the right mindset, determination and action. Earlier in his career, Arnold struggled with getting work because of his thick accent. His voice was replaced with a voiceover in one of his first movies, “Hercules in New York“! He could have been discouraged and given up on his acting career. Instead, he took voice coaching lessons and got better, became famous and successful and extended that success to almost every aspect of his life.
Related: Want To Succeed? Turn Your Fixed Mindset into a Growth Mindset
Sometimes when people are unhappy with their situation in life, they believe changing their location will improve things. Perhaps they say, “If I lived here and not there, everything would be ok.” However, they often find that their original problems, difficulties and challenges have moved with them after relocating. If they have a fixed mindset before relocating and have one after, they may be happy for a short while, but soon the reality of the struggles in their mind will return. Regardless of circumstance, a growth mindset trumps all.
Have you ever been stuck alone in an isolated location for a long time? I know someone who grew significant skill sets, lost 70 pounds, reclaimed good health and built two startups while dealing with a location challenge; they were alone for almost a year during the Covid-19 pandemic. For them, the “pain” of solitude was ultimately a gift, and they used it wisely.
The key to real change is commonly elusive: changing your mindset, being happy with everything you already have and being grateful to wake up to another day. Sound simple? Often it is not. When several challenges arise, it is human nature to feel overwhelmed. After a while, we can feel like boxers in a boxing match, taking one blow after another, especially if we get caught up in the negativity and sensationalism that is often pervasive in the news. It can have us thinking the next blow is around the corner.
Related: 5 Ways To Maintain A Positive Mindset (No Matter What Challenge You’re Facing)
Instead, we need to fight these thoughts and emotions daily and assume and wish that the next thing that will happen to us will be positive. Being surprised and delighted when something nice happens, and treating it like something undeserved, will completely change our life. When internalized, chased daily and pursued during critical periods of meditation and reflection, such positive thinking will change outcomes for us. It is essential to make time for ourselves for this kind of reset.
For example, if we change our minds to be in a growth mindset before the day starts, as needed during the day, and at night before bed, we’ll live a far better life. This takes energy and focus but is more than worth it. Living, talking and breathing positivity “out” will draw positivity into your life, attracting beneficial opportunities and outcomes often dismissed as impossible. Our thoughts become actions, our actions become impacts, and others will notice and be positively impacted. A kind word or thought that is genuine and can naturally emerge from this energy will also open new doors for us. The constant process of fighting to be positive can make radical differences in “what happens” to us. Instead, we are driving change instead of it driving us, and for the better.
Very often, people think that money will solve all their problems. However, having a lot of money will only last so long if they have the wrong mindset. For example, many professional athletes — often highly paid — are bankrupt five years after retiring.
Without the right mindset — for example, to focus on being an investor and not a consumer — you will always have problems with money. A growth mindset will direct your thoughts and actions to “how can I grow my money, invest, learn from mistakes, and get better at it?” Conversely, a fixed mindset may lead to an unwillingness to exercise deferred gratification, that “while we have it, we’ll spend it.”
Related: 4 Ways to Maintain a Positive Attitude Even When You’re Stressed
A growth mindset will allow the purchase of luxuries later, with profits from investment rather than salary. Given that a growth mindset and an investor mindset are tightly coupled, it further demonstrates Mark Cuban’s advice, “live like a college student.” Such an approach can lead to lasting success.
Great thoughts lead to real action, and positive action will eventually lead to positive results. Staying positive relentlessly and remaining in a growth mindset is the key to lasting success. Such a perspective will help us clear out thoughts of feeling like a victim, and instead, we will see all the obstacles we overcome as another chance at victory, and thus we will become the victor.
Armand Peri
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Nearly all entrepreneurs are looking for ways to optimize their workflow. However, it’s common for business leaders to focus on solving problems externally in their business, instead of looking within themselves. The purpose of your business should not only be to fulfill a desire for success. Moreover, it’s important that your workflow aligns with the deeper parts of who you are, what you stand for and what you wish to share with others.
As the CEO of Jumpspeak.com, I make plenty of small to grand decisions that can impact the direction of the business. I can tell you that the bad decisions I regret making are always the ones I’ve made with high emotions.
Business owners are on the road to burnout when they aren’t leading with service. By understanding how to be emotionally aware as a leader, you can manage your emotions and expand into a place of abundance. In this article, I will share some tips on how to enhance your leadership skills by healing your mindset, managing your emotions and leading with intention.
Related: 5 Ways Emotional Intelligence Will Make You a Better Leader
As an entrepreneur, it’s difficult to create boundaries when the lines between business and personal feel so blurred. However, when you ignore your emotions, they don’t disappear. They get bottled up within you and may even create symptoms within your physical body.
Sofia Sundari, who coaches high-performing entrepreneurs on emotional mastery, says that anger is connected to the liver, so ignoring it will only cause deeper concerns with your overall wellness. Her advice is to stop running from your emotions and let them flow. If you are present with how you feel, you are able to be present in your business. Being emotionally aware allows leaders to make decisions that are true to their core since it opens gateways to a smarter intuition.
People who are givers thrive when it comes to managing an abundance mindset. It’s important to know that business is not a zero-sum game. One person’s success will not affect yours. Oftentimes, it grows the entire market demand, making everyone more successful.
Everyone can benefit from learning to act from a place of abundance instead of scarcity, even if you have to fool yourself at times. Know that you have to walk the walk in your everyday life, which sometimes includes taxes, tipping, paying for cheaper tickets and more. When leaders emulate the leadership skills they strive to embody, they are able to step into their true authentic power.
Think about actionable things in your business, team and personal life that you have a limiting belief about. Then try to apply the abundance framework in that exact situation. You may be pleasantly surprised to find out that there are other solutions to your problems.
Related: 2 Keys to Improving Leaders’ Mental and Emotional Wellbeing
Leaders who have an entrepreneurial spirit can struggle with maintaining both work and business relationships. The pressure leaders place on themselves ends up interfering with their ability to be intentional and emotionally aware in their work life. In Sundari’s opinion, the dynamics of intimate relationships mirror business relationships.
She found that if her intimate relationships were going well, the business was stagnating, and vice versa. Instead of trying to keep everything separated, she made the decision to incorporate the two together, which proved successful.
Slowly start unraveling these limiting beliefs about how you “should” operate as a leader, and lean into what makes the most sense for your personal and professional priorities. If you are aware of what you need from the start, you can fill up your own cup and ensure your business moves in the right direction.
An emotionally blocked leader is not able to help themselves or their business, which is why it’s important to create a roadmap for how you want to show up in your professional life. Analyze the different areas of your personal and business life to ensure everything feels right for you.
Sean Kim
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When I left my job as a consultant in October 2021, I had never made more than $5,000 per month from my business.
Courtesy of Clo Bare Money Coach
In fact, when I made a plan to leave my 9 to 5, I had an honest conversation with myself about whether or not I was okay with the possibility of only making $60,000 per year as a money coach — less than half what I was paid at my consulting gig.
And my answer? Absolutely.
As a 31-year-old millennial who graduated college with around $80,000 of debt for a degree in English and Spanish, I never would’ve dreamed I’d be able to someday consider taking a pay cut to quit my job and go full-time with my business. In fact, prior to 2018, I was still living paycheck to paycheck, knew nothing about investing and assumed I’d work the rest of my life.
You see, I grew up believing I was just “bad with money,” like it was some character flaw you were either born with or without. I’d seen my parents struggle with credit card debt, furloughs during the Great Recession and the unending stress of living paycheck to paycheck while raising five kids. I thought struggle was normal, especially when it came to money.
I started working at the age of nine to have a little spending money and hoped I’d someday do better, but money always burned a hole in my pocket, no matter what I did.
I kept telling myself if I just had more of it, things would be fine.
Spoiler alert: No matter how much money I made, it never fixed the problem of my overspending.
It wasn’t until 2018, after spending most of my 20s without an emergency fund, overspending, not investing and thinking I’d die with student loan debt, that I decided it was time for a change.
Related: Instead of Panicking, Deal With Your Student Loans Like a CFO Would
I started learning about the debt-free community, which led me to the FIRE (financial independence, retire early) community, and eventually I thought, Why not me? Why not at least try?
Well, I’m glad I did.
Not only do I now know the peace of financial flexibility and a retirement savings that I’ve already invested enough in to have millions by the time I retire even if I don’t invest another dollar, but it also led me to something I never expected.
I started writing about budgeting and investing online, which led me to creating content on Instagram and TikTok, which led me to become who I am now: a multi-six-figure business owner.
But this time last year?
I was just excited to even be able to consider quitting my job to pursue my passion of teaching people about money full-time.
So, with a year’s emergency fund saved and a solid $5,000 from one-on-one coaching filtering into my bank account each month, I went off into full-time entrepreneurship land.
Last month was my one year anniversary, and I did not make $60,000.
The gross revenue I made from my first year as a full-time business owner was $305,000 with about $45,000 of expenses.
How did I do it?
By recognizing I had to scale, bringing in an expert and focusing on one funnel and one product.
When I quit my job, almost 100% of my income came from one-on-one coaching. In fact, during my first month of full-time business ownership, I had 60 coaching calls, with more than half of the calls lasting two hours.
By the end of the first week, after 17 coaching sessions, I was already losing my voice, and feeling drained and discouraged.
I knew I couldn’t keep up with that kind of grueling schedule, so I increased my prices in October and again in December, thinking it would lighten the load without really impacting my income.
I was wrong.
By the end of the year, I charged $499 for a two-hour session and $299 for a one-hour session — but no matter how many times I increased my prices, I still sold out within 24 hours of announcing openings in my coaching calendar.
The coaching clients kept rolling in, and I had a hard time saying no to the emails requesting help as soon as possible or clients who needed another follow-up call. So, despite trying to manage my client load, I’d always end up with more than I could handle. Between October and December that year, I ended up coaching nearly 150 people.
I was exhausted and already burned out, just two months into full-time entrepreneurship.
Then, one day while lying on the couch to close my eyes for three minutes before the next coaching call, it hit me: I needed to scale. At the rate I was going, I’d be back in corporate in three months. I was capped, and despite wanting to help more people, my system at the time was unsustainable.
I needed to find a way to move beyond selling my time. But I had no idea where to begin. That’s why I decided to bring in an expert.
Related: 5 Marketing and Branding Tips to Scale Your Online Business
Scaling beyond coaching was new territory for me, and although I’d seen other creators create courses and digital products, I wanted to make sure I was doing what was best for my business.
When I started shopping for a business coach, I was nervous because there are so many problematic business coaches who teach people how to run a business despite never having run a business before. I wanted someone I could trust, and who I knew had worked with people in a similar niche, with similar goals.
After doing my research, I decided to hire a well-regarded coach who had helped the giants in the space scale to multi-six-figure — and even seven-figure — businesses. She’d be the person who would teach me how to launch a course and build a funnel.
By working with my coach, I was able to go full-speed ahead and avoid a bunch of mistakes I would’ve made trying to do it all myself — mistakes that would’ve cost me time and money.
Investing $2,000 into my business resulted in my first product launch bringing in $35,000 — but I would’ve never gotten these kinds of results if I hadn’t hired my coach and implemented a funnel.
Related: 10 Reasons Why You Need a Business Coach
I did not know what a funnel was when I quit my job, but my funnel was the single most important investment I made in my business.
A funnel allowed me to make sales without doing anything — no posting, no DMing people, no going live to push the sale.
Instead, I was able to get people into my funnel and let the funnel do its automated magic.
Here’s how my funnel worked:
Keep in mind: At each stage, I was providing more value.
My funnel made me sales even while I slept. No posting. No exhausting my followers on all my accounts to get in on the sale. My emails were set up to do it all for me so I could spend my time doing other things to build my business.
The emails people received after signing up for the free class addressed their concerns, answered most frequently asked questions, shared testimonials and painted the appealing picture of what their life would look like after they completed the course.
I’ve come to view my funnel as a relationship builder.
So many content creators create a course or digital product and push it out to their audience without a funnel. They just put it on sale and hope people from their Instagram or TikTok will buy it because it exists. If you build it, they will come, right?
Not exactly.
We have to nurture the relationship, and an Instagram follower is at a much different stage than an email subscriber or someone who has downloaded your free guide and attended your workshop.
We have to provide consistent value that builds trust with our ideal audiences. Going straight for the killshot of “Hey, buy my product” would be like asking for a job without having ever applied or submitted a resume. You need to date your leads and nurture them by providing value.
Focusing on perfecting my funnel has allowed me to zone in on what is and isn’t working, understand my audience better and not get distracted by the shiny-object syndrome that so many new entrepreneurs face.
Related: 5 Steps to Building Your First Online Sales Funnel
Focusing on one product also allowed me to scale for several reasons.
First, it allowed me to streamline my messaging to my audience to make sure they were never confused about what I have to offer. I wanted to guarantee people went to my page and saw immediately what I specialized in: lazy investing. Not a little bit of lazy investing with some debt pay off, credit repair and budgeting sprinkled in. I want my audience to come to my page and understand exactly how I can help them.
Think about the last time you were shopping for a service: for example, a person to clean your home.
If you came across someone who had a list of services that included lawn care, car detailing, oil changes, handyman services — and oh yeah, they’d also clean your home for you — you likely wouldn’t choose that person over someone who made it clear that cleaning your home was the only thing their business did.
Focusing on one product also helped me master the product, which only made my confidence in the product stronger and, in turn, allowed me to sell with ease.
When we know without a shadow of a doubt that our products solve the problem we say they do, selling becomes simply highlighting the problem and explaining how our product is the solution.
I don’t think I could’ve made as strong of a course had I not focused on only that course in the last year. Every month I added to it, tweaked, surveyed my members and found new ways to improve it. And the result is more than 500 happy customers who are now out there building wealth on their own.
We all know how overwhelming and stressful it can be to manage a million different things: coaching, courses, digital products, group coaching and the list goes on. The mental space and clarity that come with focusing on one thing is something I’ll continue to prioritize as I build out more products in the future.
Related: 3 Things You Need to Know About Launching a Product Business
Now that I’ve worked on The Lazy Investor’s Course and its funnel for a year, you might be wondering if I’m moving on to something new.
But in 2023, I plan to continue to perfect the funnel and my offer. Because even though I’ve made more than $300,000 from my business so far, I know I can still make improvements. So I’ll continue to refine this one offer I have until I’m confident I’ve squeezed everything out of it that I can.
And then — and only then — will I move on to the next thing.
As my friend Allison Baggerly said in her keynote at Fincon this year: simple scales.
And for me?
Simple allows me to maintain a level of sanity and make sure I don’t burn out.
Chloé Daniels
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Let’s say you’re running a small business. A technology services firm with about 10 people. You’re doing fine, but you’re working very hard to do fine. You’re serving hundreds of clients. And then a new client requests your services. Except, this client is different: it’s a nonprofit organization. And the executive director of this organization is asking for a discount. “I know your hourly rate is $175,” she says. “But we’re a nonprofit — hopefully, you can give us a lower rate?”
This happens to me a few times a year. Does this happen to you? If you’re a small business owner, I bet it does. So what do you do?
On the one hand, you can be a charitable person and offer a discount to the nonprofit. Or you can be a grinch and refuse to do so. But are you really being a grinch? Are you a bad person because you don’t give a discount to a nonprofit? I don’t think so. Which is why I never go down that route. I never offer discounts just because a client is a nonprofit organization. And here are a few reasons why.
Related: Don’t Offer Customers Discounts If You Want to Be Successful
For starters, giving a discount means giving a donation, and I donate money elsewhere. My wife runs a nonprofit that helps children without financial means get help to learn how to read. We have very good friends that raise money to fund research that they pray will save their daughter from a fatal lung condition. These are really good nonprofit organizations that are doing really good things. I’m proud to support them. But of course, one can only support so many nonprofits and charities. I’ve chosen the ones I support. You choose yours. That’s all we can do.
I see other companies — usually big companies — that offer special discount programs for nonprofits. Hey, good for them. But I think that’s potentially opening up a can of worms. We live in very contentious times. People judge organizations by the causes they support. Just having a blanket policy that offers discounts to every nonprofit means I have to be consistent. It means I’m committed to doing this for charities or nonprofit organizations that may have as their cause something that I’m personally opposed to, or something my employees or customers may take issue with. Regardless of my own views, do I want my business to give discounts to organizations that support or lobby for guns or abortion for example? And remember that some nonprofits are set up that way to support organizations and people with certain political agendas that may be less than desirable to support. Frankly, I don’t want all that hassle.
And speaking of my business, I’ve got my own cash flow challenges. Giving a discount to a nonprofit essentially means I’m donating to that nonprofit. It’s literally reducing my profits for their benefit. It’s taking money out of my bank account for a cause that’s not a priority for me. Meanwhile, I’ve got a business to run, with payroll to meet and overhead expenses to pay. I don’t drive a Mercedes, and I don’t eat at fancy restaurants (although I do admit to splurging on Phillies post-season tickets but c’mon — a guy’s gotta have some things in life that bring joy!). The point is that my small business isn’t much different than a small nonprofit. I don’t see why I have to feel guilty when I don’t donate through discounts.
Related: 5 Strategies for Selling to Nonprofit Organizations
Here’s another thing: Just being a nonprofit doesn’t mean the organization is poor or cash-strapped. Some of the biggest organizations in the world are nonprofits. The Salvation Army, The United Way and the Ford Foundation are just a few that come to mind. They’re all doing great things. But does that mean I have to give them discounted rates if my firm is ever hired? When you check out the financials of some of these nonprofits you’ll see lots of money being spent on salaries, benefits, real estate and other perks for their employees and senior managers. Big nonprofits are frequently criticized for spending too much of the money they raise on overhead and other costs not associated with their core missions. Whatever. They’ve got their own recruiting and operational challenges. But is my small business supposed to fund them by giving discounts?
Finally, I don’t believe that merely operating a nonprofit organization automatically allows you to pay less for services. Why do nonprofits need “discounts” anyway? I realize they’re trying to address a societal need, but don’t all businesses in their own way address societal needs? Whose place is it to judge whether nonprofit or for-profit is better for the world? Just saying you’re a nonprofit doesn’t make your organization any more special than someone selling tires or providing landscaping services. We’re all contributing in our own way.
So no, I replied to the client, I am not in a position to offer you a discount on our hourly fees. I appreciate all the good you and your organization do for the world. But then again, my organization also does good things. I can say that we will do a great job for you and provide services that will ensure that your non-profit will operate even more productively and efficiently for your donors than before. That should be enough.
Gene Marks
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Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
“You can’t take it with you” — how often have you heard that?
It’s an oft-abused phrase employed, usually within the context of a person amassing wealth or assets beyond their needs. What it speaks to is intent, and that’s what building multi-generational wealth is all about: growing your assets to pass them on to future generations.
We’re not just talking about money and other valuable items, though. There’s far more to it than that.
Right now, in the West and throughout the world, we’re experiencing deep financial uncertainty. Especially since the crash of 2008, we’ve been on an increasingly fast treadmill of debt.
Most Millennials and Generation Z in America identified home ownership as the prime marker for success. Increasingly, though, they are being priced out of the housing market altogether. Two-thirds of non-homeowners cited affordability as why they didn’t own their own home.
There are, of course, several factors that have gone into this situation. It boils down to a total lack of focus on building generational wealth. Now we could lay that at the feet of consumerism; far too much emphasis on instant gratification, not enough on the journey of life and deferred gratification for greater future reward.
Related: Experts Share Tips on Overcoming Generational Wealth Disparity
Certainly, that’s true to an extent. We buy on credit now more than ever (I’ll get to why that’s bad…but not why you think, shortly). We seek shortcuts and outcomes rather than journeys and experiences. But as with everything in life: the answer lies in more than one factor.
Right now, we’re experiencing the perfect storm of destabilizing geopolitics, recessions, war and cultural norms that don’t favor multi-generational wealth.
We’ve cultivated this sense of wealth being about what you can demonstrate to others. It’s all about “flex” culture (as the kids say). But this belies the true nature of what it means to be wealthy.
I’m not going to say something as predictable or demonstrably untrue as: “wealth has nothing to do with money.” That kind of platitudinal soundbite is also part of the problem. We’re not holding ourselves accountable for what we say publicly. Money is absolutely a component of wealth, there’s no doubt. But it also doesn’t paint the complete picture.
A “wealth” of something simply means that you have an abundant supply of it. For example, you can have a wealth of knowledge. It comes down to how resourced you are as a person and how valuable you can be as an individual to the broader community.
We’ve done ourselves a cultural disservice in emphasizing money. Not that this is some kind of anti-capitalist rant! I’m a serial entrepreneur, after all. We do, however, need to steer the conversation towards other forms of wealth to heal the current pain we find ourselves in.
Related: Health Is Wealth: How to Move Away From Hustle Culture
Millions of dollars in the bank won’t serve you if you have to sacrifice your mental well-being and time with your family (or a family, for that matter) to achieve it. My vision of multi-generational wealth is not about one generation falling on their proverbial sword to bring it about.
My approach is about breaking these “molds” into which we constantly try to force ourselves. I want us to ditch the ‘cookie-cutter’ approach altogether and really examine what we have to offer future generations beyond just accrued capital.
Related: Successful Entrepreneurs Don’t Follow Mainstream Money Advice, And You Shouldn’t Either
Thanks to inflation, the money that you leave behind for your kids will be eroded by the sands of time anyway.
Our education systems throughout the west offer pitifully little education when it comes to money management. We need to start teaching our kids how to handle money properly if we want to build generational wealth.
We’re used to buying things on credit, usually having been fed the ridiculous line about how it frees up your capital to earn money. Given the rates that most retailers and third-party lenders charge, that’s total garbage.
You find me a savings account or investment portfolio that will give you the level of return that will match or exceed what they’re charging!
That said: we also need to avoid the trap of thinking that debt is inherently evil. It’s not. It just depends on how you use it.
Consumer debt (i.e., buying consumables with debt) is a terrible idea because you’re servicing debt on something that is losing value. Hence why you can leverage your capacity to service debt, for example, to become a lender yourself essentially. That’s how a lot of other successful entrepreneurs and I make a lot of money.
From an entrepreneurial perspective, educating your kids about how debt works is a massive leap toward building generational wealth.
This means educating yourself — no bad thing. I would encourage you to break the old habits and stigmas around debt for your own sake. Learn to identify the difference between consumer debt and the debt you can leverage.
The most important advice I can offer to you as an entrepreneur that will help you build multi-generational wealth is to…
“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how” — Friedrich Nietzsche
This is always the first port of call for anyone I coach in business. It’s the single most important thing to teach your kids if you want them to build on your legacy.
You must understand what’s driving you and why. That takes serious introspection and hard work. You will need to weed out all the programmings you’ve been fed since you were a kid that is keeping you motivated by the desires of others.
We think that so much of what drives us comes from us. More often than not, however, we’re being driven by what someone else expects of us. When we don’t confront this proactively, it leads to mid-life crises.
The stark realization that we have less time left than we’ve had throws into sharp relief all of the things we’ve valued and how little we actually did for ourselves!
Get your head around the life that you want to lead. Be an example to future generations and build your resources (money, knowledge, health, energy, etc…) to be of maximal service.
Being of service to others ultimately builds true wealth, after all.
Daniel Mangena
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This year’s speakers included founder and Chief Creative Officer of The Honest Company, Jessica Alba; actor, author and producer, Constance Wu; CEO of the Dallas Mavericks, Cynt Marshall; activist Gloria Steinem, and more.
Aptly themed “Making the Future,” this year’s conference focused representation, racial justice, reproductive rights, workplace equity, what’s next for women in Hollywood, and new models for equality in sports.
Jessica Abo
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Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
I always tell my students that “your history is not your destiny.” While that’s true, I’ve come to realize that your history can be valuable. You can gain so much from the past if you use it properly so that it trains your brain for success.
I’m guessing you’ve heard of neuroplasticity, the brain’s capacity to change and be trained. They call it “synaptic pruning, ” meaning that seldom-used neuropathways lose their power and frequently-used neuropathways get stronger.
To be successful, you want to strengthen neuropathways that lead to success.
This is where the past comes in and why often you’re told to “forget the past.” Our natural tendency is to remember the negatives of the past, what we didn’t accomplish or what didn’t work out for us. Doing this strengthens pathways that make us doubt ourselves or feel afraid. But we can use the past differently to support more positive neuropathways.
Related: 8 Steps to Move Away From the Past You Need to Leave Behind
“The way to measure your progress is backward against where you started, not against your ideal.” — Dan Sullivan.
In The Gap And The Gain, authors Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy write that when you’re going after a goal, the gap is everything between where you are now and where you want to be.
The gain is how far you’ve come, from where you started to where you are now. Most of us focus on the gap; how far we still need to go. We hardly ever acknowledge the gains we’ve made, the distance we’ve come, or how much we’ve accomplished.
But by dismissing the gain, you’re wasting a great opportunity. “Success breeds success,” and success builds confidence, right? When you notice and applaud all the challenges you’ve successfully overcome, you strengthen the “overcomer” neuropathway.
When you consistently acknowledge all those good ideas you implemented, or times you stepped out of your comfort zone, your brain starts seeing accomplishment as the norm for you. If you dismiss your progress and focus on what you haven’t yet accomplished, you’re strengthening that stressful “not there yet” feeling, which does not add to your confidence.
Try it for yourself. If you’re having a tough day, look back at where you started on this journey to build your business. Think about how far you’ve come, the obstacles you handled, and the big and small wins. Give yourself a big high five for all the gains. How do you feel?
Related: How Studying History Brings Success
“An experience only becomes valuable and useful once you’ve transformed it into a gain.” Benjamin P. Hardy
A friend of mine has a client who is a highly successful business owner. Whenever this man makes a big mistake, he says, “well, that lesson was cheaper than my college education — and probably more valuable!” He’s decided that every experience, especially the rough ones, gives him something he needs to learn. So, he’s very conscientious in figuring out what that lesson is.
It’s not always easy to figure out the lesson right after a significant setback. But if you don’t find that gold nugget, your brain might jump to false conclusions, like thinking you are not good enough for success. Instead, turn it into a gain by finding the lesson.
You can also do this with experiences in the past because the person you are today has a different perspective than the person back then. Try taking an incident in your past that still feels like a thorn in your side. What lesson could you gain from it? Did that experience make you stronger, wiser and more compassionate? Now, whenever you think of it, be sure also to remember what you gained from it.
“Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.” — Zig Ziglar
Dr. James Gross, a Stanford psychology professor, ran a study to see how our emotions or state of mind affect what we do. His team studied 60,000 people for an average of 27 days. They found that when people were in a bad mood, they avoided challenges and even slacked off. They tackled the challenging but necessary work when they were in a good mood. In other words, to get good work done, it helps to be in a good mood. And you can use the past to get there, even if today is getting you down.
Start by remembering when you felt proud, happy or especially confident. Maybe it was when you aced your third-grade spelling test or got your first job. Maybe it was going to your high school prom or stumbling across a fantastic waterfall on a hike.
The key is to really get into that experience and feel what you felt back then. Give that memory a keyword like “waterfall.” Then find another great memory and re-experience that one. Pull out these great memories and re-experience them whenever you need a boost. After a while, you’ll find that even just saying the keyword can bring in that great feeling.
So, rather than just “moving on” from your past, use it as a tool to build your business. Focus on the gains from your journey and celebrate them. Find the gems of learning from past experiences, especially the “bad,” and learn from them. Use your wonderful memories to enhance your mood so you can tackle those challenges. It’s true. Your history is not your destiny. But when you use your past properly to condition your brain for success, it can be a valuable ally.
Krista Mashore
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