ReportWire

Tag: Lessons learned

  • Lessons Learned: Gardening My Rewilded Front Yard – Gardenista

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    It wasn’t a field when we bought the house in Massachusetts, but that’s what it ended up being. At first, there were massive junipers that lined the circular driveway—a presumed early attempt at formalism that had grown gargantuan due to neglect and caused frequent ice dams on our northern-facing roof by blocking out the sun. Once they were gone, it was just a barren plain, and the nakedness created by the newfound sunlight made us do what most young, dumb homeowners do: panic-buy a tree. We placed a three-inch caliper London plane slightly off-center in the giant green oval of lawn just to add some form of life, even if it was entirely too close to the house. By the time we actually knew what we wanted to do with the space, the tree had just settled into place. So, of course, we uprooted it again to its final home on the western edge of the property, and we had the clean slate we were finally ready for.

    I’m not a big fan of the term “rewilding,” not because I don’t believe in the cause, but because I don’t think that’s what’s actually being done. If I were actually doing that here, I’d let it return to woodland. Still, it’s the best term we’ve got, so it’s what we’ll use for the sake of this story. About five years ago, we lined its central axis with an allée of crabapples (Malus ‘Indian Summer’), mowed formal paths, sowed perennial seed, and got to work rewilding. While it’s still nowhere near where I’d like it to be, there are several lessons I’ve learned throughout the process.

    Photography by Nick Spain.

    Rewilding is still gardening.

    A rewilded landscape still needs maintenance.
    Above: A rewilded landscape still needs maintenance.

    I’m fortunate that most of my garden clients are curious about and open to letting some part of their property go more natural, because it will also be easier to maintain. I’m quick to tell them, however, that low maintenance doesn’t mean no maintenance. Regardless of how you go about it, whether that’s sowing seed on freshly turned earth, utilizing plugs, planting containerized plants, or some combination of all three, you will have to get your hands dirty and manage whatever you’ve installed. I find the real joy comes from the gardening style being more laissez-faire—whether that’s haphazardly slinging around lupine heads in July so they will create more stands in coming years, or knowing that I don’t have to get every single last strand of vetch out each time I weed since there are plenty of other plants it will have to compete with.

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  • Vibe Coding Lessons: Build iOS Apps in 7 Days + Genesis Prompt

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    A couple of weeks ago I shared my blueprint for vibe coding iOS apps in coffee shops. The post was well received (and the Reddit snippet made over 250k views and 150+ comments).

    If that was the actual schedule of my 3 hours work day, in this post I’m sharing something more practical: namely the lessons learned in the process. On top of that, I’m sharing what I call the “genesis prompt”. It’s the basis I use for any of my apps, and you can just copy and paste it.

    Without further ado, let’s jump in, this post will be meaty, and the genesis prompt alone may take you 10+ minutes to read.

    Lesson 1: Use Claude to write the prompt for Claude Code

    You may choose a different reasoning model, but the core idea is that you need to have your reasoning separate from the specs. There is a mental space for thinking and another mental space for drafting actual tasks. I use my Assess Decide Do skills for this, meaning I do the research, the brainstorming and everything creative while the LLM is in Assess. Once I’m happy with how the app description looks, and I’m sure all the details are covered, I move to Decide, which means I tell the model: draft the prompt.md for Claude Code (or whatever code builder you use, Codex, Gemini, etc). From now on, I’m exclusively in Claude Code, unless I need to stop for something in lesson 2, below.

    Lesson 2: Scaffold Aggressively

    By scaffold I mean include in the initial prompt.md all the tiny things that you may usually overlook. That meant, in the beginning, I had to literally stop every time I encountered something time consuming, like the Manage encryption compliance setting in the TestFlight builds, and write it back to the genesis prompt, so the next app will have this integrated. Your specific development flow may have other tiny annoyances like this, just make sure you take the time to put them at the beginning of the workflow.

    Lesson 3: Iterate Small and with Atomic Features

    Any LLM, from a certain codebase size, will suffer from context squeeze. Meaning it will forget its recent history, or, most of the time, it will report incorrect progress (which I find really annoying). Example: it reports it finished the StoreKit integration, but then you ask about Restore Purchases, and it says: “you’re absolutely right, I didn’t implement this!”. The safest way around this annoyance is to keep track of what needs to be done, because that’s your job, for now, not the model’s job, and iterate with small, very well defined features / bug fixes, that you can then feed in lesson 4, below.

    Lesson 4: Git Aggressively

    Sometimes even the most advanced models are blundering, overwriting files or deleting them. It happened to me with a quite advanced model, Sonnet 4.6, just the other day. Because of a faulty reasoning path, it ended up deleting all my data files, by truncating them to an incorrect size. Had I not had a tight Git process, this would have been a little catastrophe (maybe not so small, actually). It takes discipline to keep committing (or not forgetting to tell the model to commit), but it pays big time.

    Lesson 5: Treat your End Product like Disposable Inventory

    If you did everything right, in about 6-7 days you will have an app ready for AppStore. That’s big. But not in the way you think it is. It may be big for you, because you get a significant chunk of validation, but market really doesn’t care. At the same time, all around the world, maybe 200,000 vibe coders are doing the exact same thing you did. The market is incredibly crowded right now, so please adjust your expectations. Think of your little app as being worth not more than one of your 50 items listed on the weekend garage sale. Of course, you may get lucky, and your app can get viral, but, again, given the current market conditions, this is more of an anomaly than the expected behavior.

    The Genesis Mega Prompt

    This is a 23 sections genesis prompt that covers all the basics in my workflow. The way I use this is to feed it as the “placeholder” to Claude after I’ve exhausted the Assess realm, meaning after I have a clear idea about the app I’m going to build, its design, monetization strategy, compliance requirements, etc. Then Claude does all the interpolation with the {{ }} blocks and gives me the complete prompt.md file which I feed to Claude Code.

    If the description and content areas are well thought, Claude Code can easily one-shot your full app with this.

    You can use this genesis prompt for free, just copy and paste.

    # {{APP_NAME}} — iOS App Genesis Prompt
    
    ## 1. Project Overview
    
    Build an iOS app called **"{{APP_NAME}}"** — {{APP_ONE_LINE_DESCRIPTION}}.
    
    {{APP_DETAILED_DESCRIPTION}}
    
    ---
    
    ## 2. Technical Requirements
    
    - **iOS version:** iOS 17+
    - **Framework:** SwiftUI
    - **Architecture:** MVVM with Swift Concurrency (async/await, actors)
    - **Device support:** iPhone and iPad compatible (responsive layout)
    - **Orientation:** {{ORIENTATION}}
      
    - **StoreKit 2** for In-App Purchases
    - **AVSpeechSynthesizer** for Text-to-Speech (if applicable)
    - **UserDefaults + FileManager** for local persistence
    - **No backend required** unless explicitly noted below
    
    ### Additional Frameworks (app-specific)
    
    {{ADDITIONAL_FRAMEWORKS}}
    
    *Examples:*
    - *AVFoundation + AudioToolbox for real-time audio generation*
    - *URLSession for external API calls (e.g., Claude API, weather API)*
    - *Core Location for location services*
    - *UserNotifications for local notifications*
    - *WidgetKit for home screen widgets*
    - *AppIntents for Siri Shortcuts*
    - *AdMob / Google Mobile Ads SDK for ad monetization*
    
    ### Required Xcode Capabilities
    
    - In-App Purchase
    - {{ADDITIONAL_CAPABILITIES}}
    
    *Examples: Push Notifications, Background Modes: Audio, Location Services.*
    
    ---
    
    ## 3. Design System
    
    ### Color Palette
    
    ```swift
    {{COLOR_PALETTE}}
    ```
    
    *Define both Light and Dark mode values if applicable. Example keys:
    background, surface, textPrimary, textSecondary, accent, accentLight, divider.
    Plus any app-specific colors (layer indicators, category tints, etc.)*
    
    ### Typography
    
    ```swift
    {{TYPOGRAPHY}}
    ```
    
    *Define font families, sizes, weights for:
    Headlines/titles, Body text, UI labels/buttons,
    Any special-purpose text (serif reading fonts, rounded child-friendly fonts, etc.)*
    
    ### Spacing & Touch Targets
    
    - Horizontal padding: {{HORIZONTAL_PADDING}}pt
    - Minimum touch target: {{MIN_TOUCH_TARGET}}pt (44pt default, 60pt+ for child apps)
    - Card internal padding: 16pt, gaps: 12pt
    - Paragraph spacing (if reading app): 20pt
    
    ### Animations
    
    - Screen transitions: 0.3s ease-out fade
    - Interactive elements: subtle scale (0.98) on press
    - Loading states: gentle pulse animation
    - {{ANIMATION_PHILOSOPHY}}
      *e.g., "No jarring animations—everything should feel mindful"https://dragosroua.com/"Organic wave visualizations"*
    
    ### App Icon Concept
    
    {{APP_ICON_DESCRIPTION}}
    
    ---
    
    ## 4. App Structure
    
    ```
    {{APP_NAME}}/
    ├── {{APP_NAME}}App.swift
    ├── Models/
    │   ├── {{MODEL_FILES}}
    │   └── ...
    ├── Views/
    │   ├── {{VIEW_FILES_AND_SUBFOLDERS}}
    │   └── ...
    ├── Services/
    │   ├── StoreKitManager.swift
    │   ├── {{SERVICE_FILES}}
    │   └── ...
    ├── Data/
    │   └── {{DATA_FILES}}
    └── Assets.xcassets/
    ```
    
    *List all model, view, and service files relevant to your app.
    Include subfolder organization (e.g., Views/Home/, Views/Settings/, Views/Paywall/).*
    
    ---
    
    ## 5. Data Models
    
    {{DATA_MODELS}}
    
    *Define all Swift structs, enums, and classes with their properties.
    Include Identifiable, Codable conformances.
    Include computed properties and helper methods.*
    
    ---
    
    ## 6. Screen Specifications
    
    {{SCREEN_SPECIFICATIONS}}
    
    *For each screen, specify:*
    - *Layout description (scroll view, split view, tab view, etc.)*
    - *Component breakdown with visual hierarchy*
    - *User interaction flows*
    - *State variations (free vs. premium, empty vs. populated, online vs. offline)*
    - *ASCII mockups where helpful*
    
    ---
    
    ## 7. In-App Purchase Configuration
    
    ### Product IDs
    
    ```swift
    // Bundle identifier base: {{BUNDLE_ID}}
    
    {{IAP_PRODUCT_IDS}}
    ```
    
    *Examples:*
    - *Non-consumable: "com.domain.app.featurename" at $X.XX*
    - *Auto-renewable subscription: "com.domain.app.premium.monthly" at $X.XX/month*
    - *Bundle: "com.domain.app.bundle.all" at $X.XX*
    
    ### StoreKit 2 Implementation
    
    Use the modern StoreKit 2 Swift API:
    - `Product.products(for:)` to load products
    - `product.purchase()` for transactions
    - `Transaction.currentEntitlements` for checking active purchases
    - Listen for `Transaction.updates` for real-time transaction handling
    - `AppStore.sync()` for restore purchases
    
    ### Purchase Flow
    
    1. User taps locked feature / content
    2. {{PARENTAL_GATE_STEP}}
       *("Show parental gate (math challenge) — required for Kids apps" or "N/A")*
    3. Present purchase sheet with feature preview, price, and "Buy" button
    4. {{BUNDLE_UPSELL}}
       *("Also show 'Get All Packs — $X.XX' option" or "N/A")*
    5. Process purchase via StoreKit 2
    6. On success, unlock content and persist state
    7. Include "Restore Purchases" button in Settings and Paywall
    
    ### Premium State Management
    
    - Store purchase status with receipt validation
    - Check entitlements on app launch
    - Update UI reactively via `@Published` / `@Observable`
    
    ### Paywall Design
    
    {{PAYWALL_DESCRIPTION}}
    
    *Describe the paywall screen: what triggers it, layout, feature comparison,
    pricing display, CTA button styling, restore purchases link, terms & privacy links.*
    
    ---
    
    ## 8. Ad Monetization (if applicable)
    
    {{AD_CONFIGURATION}}
    
    *If using ads, specify:*
    - *Ad SDK (e.g., Google AdMob)*
    - *Ad types and placements (banner, interstitial, app open, rewarded)*
    - *Frequency caps*
    - *Ad unit IDs (test + production placeholders)*
    - *Premium vs free ad visibility matrix*
    - *Revenue model estimates*
    - *SDK setup instructions (CocoaPods/SPM, Info.plist keys, initialization)*
    
    *If no ads: "No ads. Revenue is IAP-only."*
    *If Kids App: "No behavioral advertising permitted (Kids App compliance)."*
    
    ---
    
    ## 9. App-Specific Core Features
    
    {{CORE_FEATURES}}
    
    *This is where the unique functionality of your app goes. Examples:*
    - *Audio engine with signal generation layers*
    - *AI API integration with system prompts*
    - *Text-to-speech with multi-language support*
    - *Content browsing with reading progress*
    - *Real-time visualizations*
    - *Offline caching strategies*
    - *Timer/scheduler functionality*
    - *Widget and Siri Shortcuts integration*
    - *Location-based features*
    
    ---
    
    ## 10. Content / Data Specification
    
    {{CONTENT_SPECIFICATION}}
    
    *Define all bundled content:*
    - *Stories, vocabulary items, audio presets, etc.*
    - *Content categories and distribution*
    - *Content format (fields per item)*
    - *Source attribution and licensing*
    - *Placeholder vs. final content strategy*
    
    ---
    
    ## 11. Settings Screen
    
    **Sections:**
    
    {{SETTINGS_SECTIONS}}
    
    *Common sections:*
    - *App-specific preferences (voice, speed, theme, etc.)*
    - *Notification preferences (if applicable)*
    - *Account: Restore Purchases, Subscription status*
    - *About: App version, Acknowledgments, Privacy Policy link, Rate App link*
    
    ### Cross-Promotion Banner (Settings footer)
    
    ```
    ┌─────────────────────────────────────────────────┐
    │ [App Icon]  {{PROMO_TEXT}}                      │
    │                                           →     │
    └─────────────────────────────────────────────────┘
    ```
    
    - Full width, tappable
    - Opens App Store via `SKStoreProductViewController` or `UIApplication.shared.open(url)`
    - {{PROMO_PARENTAL_GATE}}
      *("Behind parental gate (Kids apps)" or "Direct link")*
    - Cross-promoted app URL: {{PROMO_APP_URL}}
    - Subtle styling, does not dominate the settings screen
    
    ---
    
    ## 12. Persistence
    
    ### UserDefaults Keys
    
    ```swift
    enum StorageKeys {
        static let isPremium = "isPremium"
        {{ADDITIONAL_STORAGE_KEYS}}
    }
    ```
    
    ### File Storage (if needed)
    
    {{FILE_STORAGE_STRATEGY}}
    
    *Examples: Documents directory for progress JSON files,
    Cached API responses for offline access,
    Keychain for sensitive data (reward tracking, etc.)*
    
    ---
    
    ## 13. Offline Behavior
    
    ### Works Offline
    {{OFFLINE_AVAILABLE}}
    
    *Examples: All bundled content, TTS, reading progress, cached API responses.*
    
    ### Requires Internet
    {{ONLINE_REQUIRED}}
    
    *Examples: AI API calls, purchases/restore, weather data, initial content fetch.*
    
    ### Offline Indicators
    - Subtle banner when offline: "You're offline. Some features limited."
    - Disable network-dependent features gracefully with user-friendly messages
    
    ---
    
    ## 14. Kids App Compliance (if applicable)
    
    {{KIDS_COMPLIANCE}}
    
    *If this is a Kids App, include:*
    - [ ] *No third-party analytics*
    - [ ] *No behavioral advertising*
    - [ ] *No external links without parental gate*
    - [ ] *Parental gate before IAP*
    - [ ] *Privacy policy URL ready*
    - [ ] *Age rating set (e.g., "Made for Kids, Ages 5 and Under")*
    - [ ] *"Made for Kids" flag enabled in App Store Connect*
    
    *If not a Kids App: "Not applicable — standard App Store guidelines apply."*
    
    ---
    
    ## 15. Build Configuration & Compliance
    
    ### Encryption Export Compliance
    
    Add to `Info.plist`:
    
    ```xml
    ITSAppUsesNonExemptEncryption
    
    ```
    
    This prevents the manual encryption compliance questionnaire from blocking
    **every single TestFlight build** in App Store Connect. Set to `false` if the app:
    - Does NOT use custom encryption
    - Only uses standard HTTPS (URLSession) for network calls
    - Only uses Apple-provided encryption (StoreKit, etc.)
    
    If your app uses custom encryption beyond standard HTTPS, set to `true`
    and prepare export compliance documentation.
    
    ### App Transport Security
    
    Standard ATS is fine for most apps. If you need non-HTTPS endpoints (rare):
    
    ```xml
    NSAppTransportSecurity
    
        NSExceptionDomains
        
            
        
    
    ```
    
    ### Background Modes (if applicable)
    
    ```xml
    UIBackgroundModes
    
        {{BACKGROUND_MODES}}
        
    
    ```
    
    ### Orientation Lock (if applicable)
    
    ```xml
    UISupportedInterfaceOrientations
    
        {{SUPPORTED_ORIENTATIONS}}
        
        
    
    ```
    
    ### Privacy Usage Descriptions
    
    Add all required `NS...UsageDescription` keys to `Info.plist`:
    
    ```xml
    {{PRIVACY_USAGE_DESCRIPTIONS}}
    ```
    
    *Examples: NSSpeechRecognitionUsageDescription,
    NSLocationWhenInUseUsageDescription, NSMicrophoneUsageDescription.*
    
    ---
    
    ## 16. App Store Metadata
    
    ### App Identity
    
    | Field | Value |
    |-------|-------|
    | **App Name** | {{APP_NAME}} |
    | **Bundle ID** | {{BUNDLE_ID}} |
    | **Subtitle** | {{APP_SUBTITLE}} (max 30 characters) |
    | **Primary Category** | {{PRIMARY_CATEGORY}} |
    | **Secondary Category** | {{SECONDARY_CATEGORY}} |
    | **Age Rating** | {{AGE_RATING}} |
    
    ### Description
    
    ```
    {{APP_STORE_DESCRIPTION}}
    ```
    
    *Write a compelling App Store description:*
    - *Lead with the value proposition (first 3 lines visible before "more")*
    - *Feature highlights*
    - *Free vs. premium comparison*
    - *Honest disclaimers if applicable*
    - *4000 character max*
    
    ### Promotional Text
    
    ```
    {{PROMOTIONAL_TEXT}}
    ```
    
    *170 characters max. Can be updated without a new app version.*
    
    ### Keywords
    
    ```
    {{KEYWORDS}}
    ```
    
    *100 characters max, comma-separated. No spaces after commas.
    Focus on discoverability. Avoid repeating words from app name.*
    
    ### What's New (for updates)
    
    ```
    {{WHATS_NEW}}
    ```
    
    ### App Review Notes
    
    ```
    {{APP_REVIEW_NOTES}}
    ```
    
    *Include anything the review team needs to know:*
    - *How to test IAP (sandbox account if needed)*
    - *Explanation of non-obvious features*
    - *Disclaimers (e.g., health/science claims)*
    - *Background audio justification*
    - *Demo credentials if login required*
    
    ### Screenshots Specification
    
    | Device | Size | Orientation | Count |
    |--------|------|-------------|-------|
    | iPhone 6.9" | 1320 × 2868 | {{ORIENTATION}} | 6-10 |
    | iPhone 6.7" | 1290 × 2796 | {{ORIENTATION}} | 6-10 |
    | iPad 13" | 2064 × 2752 | {{ORIENTATION}} | 6-10 |
    
    *Plan screenshot content:*
    1. *Hero shot (main feature)*
    2. *Key feature #1*
    3. *Key feature #2*
    4. *Premium/paywall value prop*
    5. *Settings/customization*
    *(Continue as needed, up to 10 per device)*
    
    ### Privacy Nutrition Label
    
    ```
    {{PRIVACY_NUTRITION_LABEL}}
    ```
    
    *Options:*
    - *"Data Not Collected: We do not collect any data from this app."*
    - *Or specify: Data Used to Track You / Data Linked to You / Data Not Linked to You*
    
    ### Privacy Policy URL
    
    {{PRIVACY_POLICY_URL}}
    
    ### Support URL
    
    {{SUPPORT_URL}}
    
    ### Marketing URL (optional)
    
    {{MARKETING_URL}}
    
    ---
    
    ## 17. Data & Privacy Compliance
    
    - {{DATA_COLLECTION_POLICY}}
      *e.g., "No personal data collected"https://dragosroua.com/"Location used on-device only"*
    - {{ANALYTICS_POLICY}}
      *e.g., "No analytics SDK"https://dragosroua.com/"Firebase Analytics with anonymized data"*
    - App Tracking Transparency: {{ATT_REQUIRED}}
      *"NOT required (no tracking)"https://dragosroua.com/"Required — implement ATT prompt"*
    - GDPR/CCPA: {{GDPR_NOTES}}
    
    ---
    
    ## 18. Implementation Priority
    
    ### Phase 1: Core Experience
    {{PHASE_1_TASKS}}
    
    ### Phase 2: Polish & Secondary Features
    {{PHASE_2_TASKS}}
    
    ### Phase 3: Monetization
    {{PHASE_3_TASKS}}
    
    ### Phase 4: Final Polish & Submission
    - Dark mode support (if not already implemented)
    - iPad layout optimization
    - Accessibility (VoiceOver, Dynamic Type)
    - Error handling and edge cases
    - App Store assets (screenshots, preview video)
    - TestFlight beta testing
    
    ---
    
    ## 19. Build & Release Checklist
    
    ### Pre-Submission
    - [ ] All core features functional and tested
    - [ ] StoreKit 2 purchases work in sandbox
    - [ ] Restore purchases works
    - [ ] `ITSAppUsesNonExemptEncryption` set to `false` in Info.plist
    - [ ] Privacy nutrition labels accurate in App Store Connect
    - [ ] Privacy policy URL is live and accessible
    - [ ] App Review notes written
    - [ ] All placeholder values replaced (API keys, product IDs, URLs)
    - [ ] No test/debug code in release build
    - [ ] Performance profiled with Instruments
    - {{ADDITIONAL_CHECKLIST_ITEMS}}
    
    ### App Store Connect Setup
    - [ ] App record created with correct Bundle ID
    - [ ] In-App Purchase products created and approved
    - [ ] Screenshots uploaded for all required device sizes
    - [ ] Description, keywords, and promotional text finalized
    - [ ] Age rating questionnaire completed
    - [ ] Pricing and availability set
    - [ ] App Review information filled in (contact, notes, demo account)
    - [ ] Build uploaded and selected
    - [ ] Submit for review
    
    ---
    
    ## 20. App Entry Point
    
    ```swift
    // Note: the struct name must be valid Swift — PascalCase, no spaces or hyphens.
    // e.g., "Zen Tales" becomes ZenTalesApp, "MosquiGo" becomes MosquiGoApp.
    @main
    struct {{APP_NAME}}App: App {
        @StateObject private var storeManager = StoreKitManager()
        {{ADDITIONAL_STATE_OBJECTS}}
    
        var body: some Scene {
            WindowGroup {
                {{ROOT_VIEW}}()
                    .environmentObject(storeManager)
                    {{ADDITIONAL_ENVIRONMENT_OBJECTS}}
                    .onAppear {
                        Task {
                            await storeManager.checkEntitlement()
                        }
                    }
            }
        }
    }
    ```
    
    ---
    
    ## 21. Deliverable
    
    A complete, buildable Xcode project with:
    - All core functionality implemented
    - Full UI matching design spec
    - StoreKit 2 IAP setup (with placeholder product IDs)
    - {{ADDITIONAL_DELIVERABLES}}
    - Light and dark mode support
    - Placeholder content where final content is pending
    - All `{{PLACEHOLDER}}` values documented for easy replacement before release
    
    ---
    
    ## 22. Placeholder Reference
    
    Before submission, search the project for `{{` and replace all placeholders:
    
    | Placeholder | Description | Example |
    |-------------|-------------|---------|
    | `YOUR_API_KEY` | External API key | Obfuscated in production |
    | `com.domain.app.*` | Product IDs | Match App Store Connect |
    | `PROMO_APP_ID` | Cross-promoted app's App Store ID | `id6504167889` |
    | `PRIVACY_POLICY_URL` | Live privacy policy page | `https://yourdomain.com/privacy` |
    | {{ADDITIONAL_PLACEHOLDERS}} | | |
    
    ---
    
    ## 23. Notes
    
    {{ADDITIONAL_NOTES}}
    
    *Any final notes, known limitations, future roadmap ideas, scientific references,
    third-party attribution, or other context the builder needs.*
    

    Later edit: there’s a repo for the genesis mega prompt.

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    dragos@dragosroua.com (Dragos Roua)

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  • How To Deal With Crab Mentality, the Reddit Flavor – Dragos Roua

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    Let’s say you got lucky and caught some crabs today. The safest way to prevent them from escaping is to put the whole lot in a bucket. Doesn’t even have to be a big one, the point is to put all of them together. What will happen is that, even if a single crab could theoretically climb out to freedom, the other ones will drag the poor guy down, enforcing the same level of captivity across the whole bucket. Eventually, every one of them will end up being eaten.

    This behavior is called “crab mentality” and, in human terms, it’s the tendency to undermine anyone who starts succeeding, and, in some cases, ensure everyone loses the same.

    Structural and Behavioral Crab Mentality

    In some social structures this is enforced at the core level. In communism, for example, it is against the system to be better, everybody must be equal (of course, this never happens). In big, formalized companies, this is also kinda the default policy: you can’t just be better and climb towards better positions: your peers will do whatever they can to maintain the status quo.

    But even without the structural enforcement, there is a certain kind of crab mentality which manifests in any community that thrives on attention. Like social media, for example.

    And, with that, we get to the main topic of today’s post.

    Recently, I’ve been experimenting with promoting my blog on various social media platforms. One of them is Reddit. After a period of adjustments, I started to have consistently good results: between 50k and 120k views per post, reaching top 5 in some of the most active subreddits.

    And here’s where the Reddit crab mentality started to hit.

    To be completely honest, it didn’t happen on every post. But it did happen on the majority of popular posts (think top 10), roughly around 2 out of the 3. There were also posts with a more coherent and supportive treatment, but they were a minority. If you ever plan to be active on Reddit, this post is for you.

    How Reddit’s Crab Mentality Works

    I’ve tracked the pattern across multiple posts now, and it has a remarkably consistent blueprint. Here’s how a post that makes it to top 10 typically evolves:

    Phase 1: Early traction (position 50+)
    Some people find the post useful. Voting is mostly organic and positive. Ratio sits around 90-95%. Comments are barely popping in, but those who do are genuine.

    Phase 2: Climbing (positions 30-10)
    More visibility brings the first wave of engagement. Comments start to be mostly neutral or appreciative. First downvotes creep in, but nothing dramatic. Voting ratio drops to around 85%.

    Phase 3: The crab zone (positions 10-4)
    This is where it gets interesting. Negative comments surge. Downvoting on OP’s replies increases sharply. Voting ratio crashes to around 70%, sometimes way below 50%. The post starts declining, leaving top 10—but the ones replacing it will get the exact same treatment.

    To make sure this wasn’t just a fluke, I cross-posted the same content to three different subreddits and tracked what happened. In r/ClaudeAI, it reached 4th place. In r/Anthropic, also 4th place, with slightly less crab mentality—probably because it’s a smaller, more focused community. In r/ChatGPT, it climbed to 9th place, with the same patterns but significantly more views thanks to its 11 million users. Across all three, the post pulled in over 250k views. Three different subreddits, three different sizes, but the same predictable flow.

    The sweet spot seems to be positions 10-15. That’s where you get an engaged and honest audience. Once you break into the top 10, the fight for attention turns ugly. At that point, many commenters aren’t even reading what you wrote. They’re just piggybacking on the visibility, posting negative comments for contrast: “this is ridiculous,” “I’m smarter than this,” “what’s this even doing here.” The goal isn’t to engage with your content. It’s to position themselves as superior to something that’s already getting attention.

    How To Deal With Reddit’s Crab Mentality

    Learn constructive criticism. You’re not perfect, and you can make mistakes. You can come off as aggressive, even if you don’t mean to. Learn how to dissociate constructive criticism from crab mentality – and the simplest way is to separate action attacks from personal attacks. If someone says “you are an idiot”, that’s crab mentality, it signals “I’m better than you / you don’t deserve to be on this spot”. But if someone says: “what you did could be improved”, they’re talking about something you did, not about who you are. They may of course still be wrong, but at least they’re not 100% dismissive.

    Learn the patterns. I learned the hard way that answering every single comment is a dead end. It creates a downward spiral. The more you respond, the more surface area you give the crabs, and the longer the fight drags on.

    Adjust your expectations. Reddit can generate insane amounts of traffic, really fast. But the quality isn’t quite there. You’ll get some engaged, smart users, but they’re the minority. For example, from my 250k views posts, I got around 1200 visits to the blog, and about 4 of them converted into free subscribers to my newsletter. The majority has a very short attention span, seeks validation, and leans aggressive. Factor that into your strategy.

    Crab Mentality Everywhere

    Crab mentality isn’t a Reddit thing. It’s a human thing. Any community where visibility is limited and attention is currency will likely develop similar dynamics. The platforms may change, but the mechanics will stay the same: when someone starts climbing, others often try to pull them back down.

    From my own experience, the best way forward is to keep climbing. Arguing with crabs rarely leads anywhere. Explaining yourself to people who aren’t listening tends to drain more than it resolves. Protecting your energy, learning what you can from the friction, and staying focused on the work that got you noticed in the first place.

    The crabs aren’t your audience. The people who upvoted you to the top are.

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  • Squid Game Seasons 2, 3 Review: Was It Worth It? – Dragos Roua

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    Every few months I write movie reviews here. Sometimes for the lessons, like my Kung Fu Panda 2 piece, which became quite popular. Sometimes just for movies I enjoy, like Looking for a Lady with Fangs and a Moustache. Today I’m returning to a series I reviewed back in 2021, when it first took over the world.

    Back then, I gave Squid Game a 10 out of 10. I also predicted there would be pressure for more seasons. Look like I was right.

    Same Creative Genius

    The games in seasons 2 and 3 maintain the same level of creativity. Sky Squid Game, the finale played on towering pillars, is just as inventive as Red Light Green Light was back in season one. But honestly, compelling and creative as they were, the games were never really the point.

    What makes Squid Game compelling is its human documentary angle. And the truth is humans are fighting to eliminate themselves in real life just as fast as in Squid Game. The contestants don’t need pink soldiers to pull the trigger. Give people enough desperation, enough debt, enough hopelessness, and they’ll do it themselves. The games in the movie are just a creative canvas.

    We watch fathers willing to sacrifice their own children. We see alliances form and shatter within hours. We see VIPs betting on who dies next.

    End of an Era

    Gi-hun dies in Season 3. The main character, Player 456, the gambling addict who won the first game and spent three seasons trying to destroy it from within – gone. He sacrifices himself to save a baby, the child of another contestant. In a show filled with betrayal and self-preservation, this choice matters.

    The protagonist who entered as a flawed, estranged father dies protecting someone else’s child. It doesn’t feel like redemption. More like a statement that even in a system designed to strip away humanity, the choice to remain human persists. A gentle, silent statement.

    Beginning of a New One

    The ending doesn’t close the story – it seems to open a bigger one.

    The Front Man travels to Los Angeles. In an alley, he sees a well-dressed blonde woman playing ddakji with a desperate man. She’s a recruiter played by Cate Blanchett. Which may mean the games are going global.

    Meanwhile, Gi-hun’s daughter receives his winnings from the Front Man himself. The daughter he never managed to reconnect with now holds the blood money. Again, this doesn’t feel like justice or even closure. It feels like reality.

    The setup hints at a continuation – potentially an American version, with new players, new games, maybe even Gi-hun’s daughter as protagonist. The game adapts. The game never ends.

    The Verdict

    Seasons 2 and 3 aren’t as spectacular as the first – and they couldn’t be. You’ve already been exposed to the core of the movie. But they manage to complete and expand on the initial proposal in a very compelling way. The first season asked “what would you do for money?” These final seasons ask “was it really worth it?”

    The answer, delivered through Gi-hun’s sacrifice and the American recruiter’s smile: Maybe not. Maybe yes. One era ends. Another begins.

    Do I recommend it? Absolutely.

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    dragos@dragosroua.com (Dragos Roua)

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  • Networking 101 for Location Independent People – Dragos Roua

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    When you become location independent, your network of people changes drastically from what you had when you lived in a stable place.

    You no longer have access to your high school friends. You lose touch with colleagues. Those decade-long neighbors, the people with whom you’d established solid contacts over years of shared proximity—they fade into occasional messages, random encounters or annual catch-ups.

    Your social life becomes significantly more frail.

    This is why networking for location independent people should be a priority. It’s how you discover, nurture, and maintain social contacts that will literally help you maintain your mental health.

    Here’s what worked for me, real insights from more than 10 years as a digital nomad.

    1. Be Available

    Being available means going out and actively pursuing social activities.

    When you live in a stable environment, you take this for granted. You don’t even think about networking unless your job requires meeting new people. Otherwise, you’re fine with what you have. The context provides everything you need—the office water cooler, the neighborhood barbecue, the school pickup line.

    But here, in the location independent life, you need to maintain an active approach.

    Being available means putting networking in your top five priorities, alongside generating income and aggressive budgeting—your financial resilience activities. Social resilience deserves the same intentional effort.

    2. Be Useful

    Every time you interact with someone, go out of your way to provide useful information.

    Whether it’s about job opportunities, how to navigate the neighborhood, or how to find promotions at the grocery store on the corner—you’re better off if you provide real advice, real data. Something actionable that people actually need.

    Every interaction is an opportunity to show you have something in your backpack. Some discovery. Some new coffee shop. Some local insight.

    For instance, I share a lot of insights with my friends about the jjimjilbang—the Korean bathhouse—in the neighborhood where I’ve been living for the last six months. It sounds small, but it helps strengthen relationships and bonds in surprisingly meaningful ways.

    Don’t just take from the network, try to give something back to it.

    3. Pursue Both Formalized and Unformalized Meetings

    By formalized, I mean: meetups, organized groups, things through your job context, or anything set up in a structured way.

    By unformalized, I mean: coffee shops, bars, live events, impromptu gatherings like concerts—anything that isn’t a specific networking event.

    In my experience, the impact of both is about 50/50. Both are important. Both are necessary.

    Don’t only try making friends with the barista from your favorite coffee shop. And don’t rely solely on the regular meetups you find on apps in your local neighborhood.

    You need both.

    A Word of Caution

    I’ve found that unformalized events work better for long-term emotional support, while formalized events work better for long-term business support.

    This makes sense when you think about the context in which you meet people. At a meetup, everyone’s there with some agenda—learning, networking, professional development. At a random bar or concert, people are just being human. The connections form differently.

    Build both types of relationships. You’ll need them both.

    4. Build Beyond the Couple

    Let’s say you already have a location independent lifestyle within a couple. Your girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, or husband travels with you, and you function well together as a unit.

    This is already a big step forward. Having a partner will greatly reduce the feelings of isolation, the sense of being lost, and the lack of social connection that can otherwise erode your mental health.

    However, even with a solid couple life, you still need to go out and meet new people.

    New people who help you regulate different parts of your activity—the business level, the sport level, the intellectual level. You may have a group you play padel with, a group you play Scrabble with, a group you go hiking with. You might only see these people every four or six months as your travels loop back through certain cities. But they need to be part of your life.

    The strength of a couple unit is significant. It’s vastly better than traveling alone.

    But in time, even this can be crushed. The pressure of loneliness—when you have no one but each other—can make the whole structure implode from within. The relationship starts carrying weight it was never designed to bear. Every social need, every intellectual conversation, every moment of external validation flows through one person.

    Take care of the social health of your relationship by building connections outside the couple. Your partnership will be stronger for it.

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  • Garden Visit: An 81-Year-Old Daily Gardener in Oakland Shares Her Lessons Learned – Gardenista

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    Ann Nichol’s home and garden in Oakland, CA, is impossible to miss. Fortunately, there is ample street parking on her block to pull over and gawk and be inspired by the colorful waves of plants on her property.

    When Ann and her husband moved into their home in 1983, the property was filled with agapanthus, a few camellia bushes and “tons and tons of crabgrass,” she says. After two years of clearing and amending the tired soil, Ann was ready to make the garden her own. The only plant that survived the purge: a stately Canary date palm that has since quadrupled in height. “I hemmed and hawed over it for quite a while, as I wasn’t keen on having a tropical garden. However, having decided to let it stay, I felt obliged to keep it company with other tropical plants.” Ann eventually brought in landscape architect Bob Clark, who suggested she divide the garden into different levels and rooms. Unfortunately, Bob left the Bay Area before he was able to add any plants. No worries, Ann was more than up for the challenge and, in the beginning, did the planting herself.

    Ann’s entry into gardening started when she was in her early thirties and living in a different house. Her neighbor across the street was a gardener and had a tiny plot filled with plants. Ann spent time with her friend in her garden and according to Ann, this turned into “a pastime, which became an addiction.” Still pruning, curating, and appreciating, Ann, at 81 years old, knows a thing or two about the power of gardening.

    Here are her lessons learned from decades of working the soil.

    Photography by Kier Holmes.

    It’s about the journey, not the destination.

    Above: Neighbors and people passing by get a free and inspiring view of her lush and well-loved oasis.

    What gardener doesn’t get impatient and want immediate gratification from time to time, but deep down we know that we need to slow down, pause, and not rush ourselves so terribly. Ann knows this mantra well as some of her chosen plants don’t bloom overnight or fill in the nooks and crannies with a blink. “Being patient positively affects both plants and well-being,” she shares. “Once you and your plants get to know each other, the plants will tell you what they need if you listen.” Do they need more water or a shadier spot, perhaps?

    Trust your gut.

    Even the steps leading to Ann�217;s front door are decorated with specimen potted plants, creating another plant-filled experience.
    Above: Even the steps leading to Ann’s front door are decorated with specimen potted plants, creating another plant-filled experience.

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  • 55 Life Lessons I learned in 55 Years – Dragos Roua

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    I made it. Today I turn 55. So far, my survival rate is 100%. Not bad.

    Actually, it’s way better than “not bad”. I call this decade the “fabulous fifties”: I changed countries 3 times, got married (again) had a beautiful baby (again) and many other amazing things happened. Although extremely rollercoaster-ish, it was by far the best decade of my life. And I’m only half way through it.

    Here are 55 things I learned so far. They’re in no particular order, and their significance varies a lot: some are simple, some are deep, some are probably obvious to you.

    1. Change is unavoidable, growing up is optional

    People will change. Your job will change. You will change. And if you try to resist it, the unstoppable machinery of reality will shred you to pieces. The only way out from the grinder is to accept change and then do your best to outsmart it. Also known as growing up.

    2. The most used accessory for a digital nomad is not a smartphone

    It’s an umbrella. To this day, I never leave home without one in my backpack.

    3. Trust is hard to build

    And way harder to keep. It’s a process that needs ongoing maintenance. Brush-your-teeth-daily level of maintenance.

    4. True, honest friends are like Bitcoin

    Their supply is limited and their value goes only up, never down.

    5. Friendship in a romantic relationship is a blessing

    You can have a really fulfilling romance just fine without being friends. But if you are also friends, then sometimes, when the life gets hard, it may help you reignite the passion. Sometimes.

    6. Starting a fitness habit, like running, takes at least a few months

    That’s way, way more than fitness gurus are preaching. You cannot “change your life in just 10 days”. It requires a lot of commitment and discipline to truly implement the habit. Finishing a 220km+ ultramarathon changes your life forever, though.

    7. Walking 10km/day adds years to your life

    Not in a metaphorical way. It actually does.

    8. Coding daily does to your brain what walking 10km/day does to your body

    If you can’t code, journaling also works (see below). Just use that grey ball of matter every. Single. Day.

    9. Setting healthy personal boundaries in any relationship (romantic, parental, work) is fundamental

    Without them, sooner or later, one of the partners will end up claiming everything, and the relationship will eventually break under its own weight.

    10. Setting healthy personal boundaries is a form of art, though

    And should be thought in school. Alas, it is not, so you’re left with learning by trial and error. Mostly error.

    11. You can genuinely love someone without being in a relationship

    Love is something you are, a relationship is something you build. And you cannot build one alone.

    12. The whole concept of “home” is overrated

    I entered my fabulous fifties without one, living in 3 different countries so far. A good sense of identity and strong personal values are way more important for grounding and recharging, no matter where you are in the physical world.

    13. Money is important only when you don’t have it

    That’s why it is usually a good thing to make money unimportant. Read that again, please.

    14. One of life’s most difficult skills is knowing when to choose stubbornness, and when to choose flexibility

    Your stubbornness, your persistence, is deciding your success rate. Your flexibility, your sense of adaptation, is deciding your survival rate.

    15. Survival always favors the most adaptable, not the strongest

    If survival was favoring the strongest, and NOT the ones most willing to adapt, we would all be dinosaurs now, and our iPhones would weigh at least 10 kilos. Maybe 12 with protective cases.

    16. There’s a difference between being broke and being poor

    Being broke is temporary and almost always fixable. More often than not, bouncing back from being broke gets you at higher levels than before. Being poor is a mindset that can persist even with money. Some of the weirdest poor persons I met were incredibly rich people, constantly thinking they don’t have enough.

    17. You can always do more, always

    When you fell like you can’t move forward anymore, like every cell in your body is screaming “stop”, you’re actually at 40% capacity. You still have at least 60% more potential, you just don’t know how to reach it. I learned this by running marathons and ultramarathons. But it also applies to business or relationships.

    18. The most dangerous sentence in any language is “I know”

    The moment you think you know something, you stop learning about it. I try to replace “I know” with “I think” or “my experience so far is”. It keeps the learning doors open.

    19. Fear of failure is usually worse than actual failure

    Most failures teach you something valuable. Fear just paralyzes you. Fear is the mind killer.

    20. The best productivity system is the one you actually use

    I’ve tried them all – GTD, bullet journals, fancy apps. What works is whatever feels natural enough that you don’t resist it.

    21. You can’t sail a toy boat on a pierced bucket

    Fix the leaks before optimizing the sails. Financial stability requires plugging spending leaks before pursuing growth opportunities. Establish budgeting discipline and eliminate wasteful spending to create a stable foundation.

    22. Debt is death

    Or at least death of freedom. Every debt you carry is a chain that limits your options, your mobility, and your ability to make choices based on what you want rather than what you owe. Financial independence starts with owing nothing.

    23. Learning public speaking is great, but learning how to keep your mouth shut is better

    There’s tremendous power in knowing when to speak and when to stay silent. Sometimes the most intelligent contribution to a conversation is the one you don’t make. Restraint is a form of wisdom that too few people master.

    24. There’s a big difference between owning and having access to something

    In today’s rapidly changing world, having flexible access to assets is often strategically superior to owning them outright. Access protects against unpredictable costs, enables faster adaptation, and reduces exposure to asset obsolescence. Ownership means control, but also burden.

    25. Life is not a movie, so you’re not a movie star

    Modern social media culture encourages people to script and perform their lives like movie characters, creating artificial personas disconnected from authentic human experience. Stop treating your existence as a brand to be marketed. Accept the messy reality of being human rather than a manufactured character.

    26. Never shop on an empty stomach

    This simple rule saves you from countless bad decisions. Hunger clouds judgment and makes everything look appealing. It applies to more than just groceries—never make important decisions when you’re in a state of lack or desperation.

    27. Too much is just as bad as too little

    Sudden wealth creates problems because people lack experience managing larger sums. Build wealth incrementally through small, manageable increases, allowing yourself time to adapt to each new financial level. This principle applies to everything: success, attention, power. Balance is the key.

    28. The most interesting conversations happen during long runs

    In an ultra-marathon, when you’re in the race for more than 10 hours, you simply cannot stand any kind of pretense, or white lie, there’s simply no more energy left for that. You just tell it like it is. If people would function at the same honesty level in their daily lives, the world will be a much better place.

    29. Humans need entropy

    Too much comfort, and we die by complacency. Too much chaos, and we burn out, we disintegrate. The sweet spot is at the edge, constant dance between chaos and order.

    30. The obstacle is not the bottleneck

    Obstacles block paths temporarily. Bottlenecks restrict flow permanently. While popular wisdom suggests confronting obstacles head-on, persistent bottlenecks are dead ends requiring a change of course rather than perseverance. Staying in a bottleneck depletes your energy and limits future options. Know when to pivot.

    31. Playing the long game always wins

    Short game may give gratification, and gratification is tasty. But try to position for the long game, every time you can, as the benefits will be lasting a life time. Hint: you can always position yourself for the long game.

    32. Location independence is not a luxury anymore

    It has evolved from a luxury into an essential survival skill due to rapid political and social uncertainty. Mobility means optionality means security in an unpredictable world. Remote work combined with geo-arbitrage now makes this lifestyle accessible to ordinary people, not just the wealthy.

    33. Living life like a tourist is nice, but living life like a traveler is better

    I already wrote a couple of time about the tourist bias, and it’s a nice thing to experiment. But there’s a difference between a tourist and a traveler: the tourist visits places, the traveler meets people.

    34. Apologizing when you’re wrong is a superpower

    Even if it feels very hard to do it, it pays big time. You lower the friction, and that helps getting back on track faster: most people are so surprised by genuine apologies that they immediately want to resolve the conflict. Not to mention the damage your ego gets when you apologize. And your ego being damaged is a good thing.

    35. We can only connect the dots backwards

    Life’s meaning and direction only become clear in retrospect. While we cannot predict how our choices will unfold, trusting the process and making intentional decisions allows unexpected outcomes to reveal themselves as part of a meaningful pattern. Often, what initially feels like detours or disappointments lead to better destinations than we could have planned.

    36. An early riser is a failed late riser

    Becoming an early riser isn’t about inherent superiority—it’s simply the result of abandoning late-night habits. You get to be an early riser only after you fail to be a late riser. This principle extends beyond sleep schedules: sometimes the path to improvement lies in consistently moving away from what doesn’t serve us.

    37. The internet should be consumed with caution

    It is indeed the world’s largest library, but also the world’s largest mind controlling tool. The attention economy became so specialized, that now it’s almost trivial to create a trend or to swing democratic elections in any country, just by playing with people’s minds over the internet. Learning to consume this medium mindfully is a crucial 21st-century skill.

    38. Your future self is counting on the decisions you make today

    You literally build the future version of you with any decision you make, every single one. So, choose wisely. Also, try to make friends with your future self – you’ll be spending a lot of time together.

    39. Being lonely is very different from being alone

    Loneliness and solitude are completely different experiences. One is painful, diminishing and hurts big time. The other is recharging, constantly supportive and heals big time. Learning this difference changes everything.

    40. The most productive people I know aren’t the busiest ones

    They’re the ones who’ve learned to say no to almost everything so they can say yes to what truly matters. They know how to make room for energy to flow, not to stay blocked in rigid systems.

    41. Your opinion of yourself matters more than anyone else’s opinion of you

    But it took me 50 years to really understand (and believe) this.

    42. A good habit is an invisible habit

    The best habits eventually become so integrated into your life that you stop thinking about them—they become invisible. Once you achieve meaningful goals through consistent habits, let them blend naturally into your routine rather than continuously chasing the next objective, allowing you to find contentment in what was once an aspirational target.

    43. The best time to start doing what you like was 20 years ago

    The second best time is now. I know this saying is about planting a tree. But I learned that it applies to almost everything in life.

    44. Making your bed every morning is one of the best habits you can build

    It provides psychological control and stability in an unpredictable day. This is a part of the day that you can control. It doesn’t take too much time or energy. By completing this small, tangible task before facing life’s chaos, you establish an anchor of accomplishment and create something orderly to return to—transforming a simple habit into a powerful tool for mental resilience.

    45. The most expensive thing in the universe is stupidity

    Or, if you want a nicer way to put it: lack of education. When you keep being stupid, when you avoid learning, you do things that make you pay incredible amounts. And the sad thing is that you pay not only with money, but also with time.

    46. Your health is your real wealth

    Everything else becomes meaningless if you don’t have it.

    47. The person you’re most attracted to initially is rarely the person you should be with long-term

    Chemistry and compatibility are different things. Sometimes, in very rare occasions, they can happen at the same time, but these occurrences are so rare that they’re spread not over a lifetime, but over a few reincarnations. Popular name: soulmates. If you find one, consider yourself very, very happy.

    48. Your past is not determining your future

    But the stories you tell yourself about your past determine your future more than the actual events that happened.

    49. Comparing yourself to others is always a losing game

    What you see of others is never their real image. What you show of yourself is never your entire persona. You’re comparing apples to peaches.

    50. The most important relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself

    If that’s broken, all other relationships will struggle.

    51. Success is not about reaching some destination

    It’s about becoming the kind of person who can reach any destination. It’s who you become, not what you get.

    52. The older I get, the more I realize that being right is overrated

    Being kind and being happy are much better states to be in.

    53. Every expert was once a beginner

    Every pro was once an amateur. Every famous person was once an unknown. Then only thing they did different, that set them apart, was that they kept pushing forward.

    54. Life is not a problem to be solved

    It is way too complicated to be solved. Better look at it as a reality to be experienced. Sometimes the best strategy is to stop strategizing and just be present. Move with the tide. See where you land next.

    55. Love matters

    We come into this world with nothing, but I feel deeply that we don’t leave empty handed: we take with us all the true love we experienced. And the only true love is the one you give, unconditionally, the love you receive is just happening to you, it’s not part of you.


    That’s it. 55 lessons from 55 years on this beautiful, messy, wonderful planet.

    If you’re younger than 55, don’t worry – you don’t need to wait decades to learn these things. Most of them are available to you right now, if you’re paying attention.

    If you’re older than 55, you probably nodded along to many of these and have a few dozen lessons of your own to add.

    And if you’re exactly 55, well, happy birthday to us. We made it this far. Here’s to whatever comes next.

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  • 7 Things I Learned From My One Year Old Son – Dragos Roua

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    I never thought I will have the chance to write something like this again. If you read my blog for some time, you may remember my “7 things I learned from my daughter” series. But that happened almost 2 decades ago, Bianca is now in college.

    And yet, here I am, a (happy) dad at 55, celebrating his third child – a smart, healthy and beautiful boy called Rovi – first birthday today.

    Here are 7 things Rovi taught be in the last 365 days.

    1. Falling Down Is Temporary, Getting Up Every Time Is What Matters

    A couple of months ago he started to walk. Or, to be more precise, he started to fall down every time he tried to get up. But he never stopped trying to get up, again and again and again. It was like he knew falling down is part of the lesson. It’s the getting up that really counts.

    2. If You Really Want Something, Don’t Stop Until You Get It

    When he is hungry or he wants something, he doesn’t stop until he gets it. Like, literally. He will not stop until he gets what he wants. I hope that later in life, this instinctual attitude will ripple into a character trait that will make him persistent, disciplined and loyal. And I’m really happy about that.

    3. Smiling Is Underrated

    He smiles all the time, to anyone, anytime. That made me understand that sometimes the burden of life pushed me away, and I forgot how smiling can change my mood, and the mood of people around me, in a second. It doesn’t cost anything, either.

    4. Sleeping Is A Superpower

    Rovi can sleep anytime, anywhere. That’s a true superpower and I hope he will maintain this for all his life. I really wish I could have this. Especially now, when sleep has been scarce.

    5. If You Don’t Like It, Just Ignore It

    As a child, he gets a lot of attention, from all kind of people. Not all of them are nice, but Rovi has this way of just ignoring them. He simply cut them from his reality, he suddenly stops looking at them, it’s like they never existed. That’s another superpower I hope he will maintain for all his life.

    6. Attachment Is Poison

    He may cry now, but then in one second he can laugh again. He doesn’t get attached to his emotions, he just fully immerses himself in them, living in the moment. Too often I forget this, insisting on my grudges, because they give me a reason to complain, or clinging too much to my pleasures, hoping they’ll last longer. Nope. Not gonna happen. Attachment is poison. Everything that matters is right here, right now, in this very moment.

    7. There’s Always A Way

    As he is starting to explore his surroundings, he encounters every day new types of obstacles. Today is the couch, tomorrow it may be a chair, and the other day the bedroom door. He almost never gets it from the first time, but, in the end, he always gets it. He always finds a way to conquer that obstacle. It’s not about not giving up, it’s about knowing, deep down, that there is always a way to get something. You may not getting from the first try – and, honestly, he doesn’t even look like he expects this – but in the end, if you stay long enough with that problem, you will find a way to solve it.

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  • My 10 AI Predictions From 2019: A Reality Check – Dragos Roua

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    In October 2019, I sat down and wrote a blog post predicting ten ways artificial intelligence would disrupt our lives. At the time, I was deep in the trenches, teaching myself AI algorithms alongside blockchain and cryptography. I was convinced I understood where things were heading.

    I had this beautifully confident model: algorithms crunching data, tuning parameters, spitting out results. Neural networks finally getting their moment because of big data. Clean. Predictable. Understandable.

    Then ChatGPT launched in November 2022, and the entire game changed.

    Six years later, I’m not just watching the AI revolution—I’m living inside it. Building an AI-powered task management app. Using Claude to migrate 2,000+ blog posts. Debugging code with AI assistance. Having conversations that would have seemed like science fiction to my 2019 self.

    So I went back and reread my predictions. Here’s what I learned.

    What I Got Right (And Why)

    DeepFakes – I wrote that “AI may turn this post-factual world into a deep-fantasy world, in which any identity will be instantly duplicable.” This aged perfectly, just faster than expected. Voice cloning, photorealistic fake images, sophisticated video deepfakes—all standard now. What I underestimated was the democratization. I thought this would be nation-states and corporations. Instead, teenagers make deepfakes in their bedrooms.

    Instant Translation – Predicted StarTrek-style real-time translation. It happened. Google Translate went from comically bad to genuinely useful. I’ve had business conversations where each person speaks their native language and AI handles translation in real-time.

    Logistics – Amazon’s AI-driven supply chains. Pandemic-accelerated demand prediction. The invisible revolution I predicted is now table stakes. Products appear on shelves when needed, in quantities matching demand almost perfectly.

    Why did I nail these? Because they’re optimization problems with clear training data. The path from “bad but improving” to “good enough” was predictable.

    What I Got Wrong (And What That Teaches Us)

    Autonomous Driving – I predicted robotaxis replacing Uber drivers and cars reconfigured with inward-facing seats by now. Six years later? Waymo in geofenced areas. Tesla FSD still requiring supervision. The revolution isn’t here yet.

    What I missed: the long tail problem. The last 5% of edge cases turned out to be 95% of the difficulty. More importantly, I missed the human factor. People are terrified, not reassured. Every accident goes viral.

    Lesson: Technical capability doesn’t equal adoption.

    Predictive Trading – I predicted AI would level the playing field, that everyone using similar algorithms would compress profits. The reality? High-frequency trading firms got more sophisticated. The gap widened instead of narrowing.

    Lesson: Technology amplifies existing advantages. It rarely levels playing fields.

    The Pattern: I overestimated physical-world disruption (autonomous driving) and underestimated information-space disruption (language models). Physical world requires infrastructure, regulations, social acceptance. Information space just requires compute and data.

    The Elephant I Missed: Large Language Models

    Here’s the uncomfortable truth: I completely missed the biggest AI development of the last six years.

    In 2019, I was thinking about narrow, specialized tools. Computer vision for driving. Translation algorithms for language. Each problem had its own specialized solution.

    I wrote: “Artificial intelligence is really just a set of algorithms… crunching large amounts of data, while tuning parameters.”

    Technically correct. Fundamentally incomplete.

    When ChatGPT launched in November 2022, millions of people suddenly had conversations with AI that could write poetry, debug code, explain complex topics, and engage in creative problem-solving. The transformer architecture had existed since 2017. GPT-3 was available since 2020. But something about ChatGPT’s interface unlocked a new understanding.

    The shift wasn’t just technical. It was conceptual.

    Previous AI was like having specialized tools—hammer, saw, screwdriver. Large language models are like having someone who understands the entire workshop. They don’t just execute tasks. They understand context, maintain conversation, reason across domains.

    I’m living inside this transformation. When I built addTaskManager, AI wasn’t a feature—it was a development partner. Code review, architecture decisions, documentation, marketing. When I migrated my blog, Claude understood my writing voice and generated SEO descriptions that matched my style while improving discoverability.

    This is the shift: from “AI as tool” to “AI as collaborator.”

    What I’d Predict Now (2025 ? 2030)

    Having learned humility, here’s what I see:

    AI Agents – Forget self-driving cars. The real autonomous revolution will be autonomous working. Not AI that responds to prompts, but agents that plan, execute, and iterate on complex tasks. Tell an AI “launch this marketing campaign” and have it research, create content, schedule posts, monitor engagement, and adjust strategy. By 2030, this will be commonplace.

    Knowledge Work Transformation – Junior copywriters will edit AI outputs, not write first drafts. Junior developers will review AI-generated code, not write boilerplate. The valuable skill won’t be doing the work—it will be knowing what to ask for and how to evaluate quality.

    AI-Augmented Entrepreneurship – I built addTaskManager in months, not years, because AI handled grunt work. By 2030, one-person companies will compete with established firms. The differentiator won’t be resources. It will be vision and the ability to direct AI effectively.

    Personal AI as Second Brain – Not episodic consultations, but persistent AI that understands your goals, style, context. That remembers conversations and learns from decisions. By 2030, your AI partnership will directly impact your productivity and effectiveness.

    What This Means for You

    Bet on directions, not specific technologies. I could have lost money on autonomous driving stocks. If I’d bet on “AI will transform information processing,” I’d have been positioned perfectly for LLMs. The technologies are unpredictable. The directions are more often than not clear, though.

    Hold your models lightly. Remember Georg the knight landing in a supermarket? That’s rapid technological change. I had a confident AI model in 2019. Then LLMs shattered it. The people thriving aren’t those who predicted perfectly—they’re those who adapted quickly.

    Build with AI, not around it. Don’t imagine a future where you avoid AI. Focus on taste and judgment. AI can generate, but evaluating quality is increasingly valuable. Move toward work requiring human creativity and decision-making.

    The 2019 Version of Me Was Right About the What, Wrong About the How

    I knew disruption was coming. I knew it would reshape industries. I was right about the disruption, wrong about the form.

    I imagined incremental improvements to narrow AI. We got a paradigm shift to general-purpose language models.

    I imagined physical-world automation. We got information-space transformation.

    I imagined AI as tool. We got AI as collaborator.

    The 2025 version of me is humbler. I’m confident about the direction—AI will continue automating cognitive work. But the biggest changes are often the ones nobody sees coming.

    What I know: the winners will be people who embrace AI as a force multiplier. As a solo entrepreneur building AI-powered products, I’m accomplishing things that would have required a team in 2019.

    Stay adaptable, keep learning, and build with AI rather than resist it.

    Whatever comes next will surprise us. Georg the knight didn’t need to predict the supermarket. He just needed to realize he wasn’t actually in hell.


    This follows up “10 Ways In Which Artificial Intelligence Is Disrupting Our Lives” from October 2019. Read the original to see how predictions looked before ChatGPT—it’s a fascinating time capsule.

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  • A Garden from Scratch: 8 Mistakes I Made as a Beginner Gardener

    A Garden from Scratch: 8 Mistakes I Made as a Beginner Gardener

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    Hindsight is a wonderful thing: After you’ve planted, say, a tree in the wrong spot, everything becomes clearer and more crystallized—including where you should have planted it. Making mistakes is a vital part of understanding why a design works, or why a plant will thrive in one place but not in another.

    When I started my garden from scratch ten years ago, I knew very little about actual gardening. My experience was limited to arranging a few pretty pots to have around the house, my plantsmanship was near zero, and I had very little funds to throw away on errors. Yet, that didn’t stop me from making them. Here are a few of the bigger mistakes I made when designing and planting a garden from scratch.

    Photography by Clare Coulson.

    1. Being impatient.

    Above: I’ve learned patience the hard way. I can still be impulsive but nowhere near as impulsive as I used to be, when I thought nothing about pulling out shrubs without truly understanding their value—and I removed some real beauties that had been long planted.

    Recently I’ve been working on a book, interviewing many landscape designers, and a commonality that emerges is that, in their own gardens, they all watch and wait. The time spent doing nothing more than staring at the garden allows them to observe trees, shrubs, and plants in all seasons. Watching and waiting also allows them to understand how the light falls in the garden at different times of year, how the weather moves through the garden, and how they themselves move through it—all of which will then inform their eventual garden design and planting.

    2. Making the beds too narrow.

    Above: Narrow borders rarely work—unless they are a neat monoculture that adds a formal note.

    Without exception, I’ve made almost all of my borders wider over time where possible, and if I were starting over again, I’d make them even deeper. Generous borders are more impactful and allow bolder views across plantings and more complex compositions.

    3. Planting trees too late.

    Above: Maturity takes time and while perennials and most shrubs will bulk up fairly quickly, trees will take a decade to really have any presence—and several decades to reach maturity.

    If you have space to plant trees, then make this one of your earliest interventions since they take years and years to mature. I wish I’d planted a field of trees or an orchard when I arrived at my garden; instead I procrastinated for years and my field is still a relatively blank canvas.

    4. Not prioritizing soil quality.

    Above: I had an obsession with flat spaces and neat lines when I started my garden, a habit I’ve since grown out of. But as a result, I moved topsoil from a sloping site to try and correct the slope. What I didn’t realize then was that I was removing the best soil. (See Your First Garden: What You Need to Know About Topsoil.)

    Consider carefully your dirt. If you’re moving earth around or taking up turf, keep it in a pile to reincorporate into the garden as topsoil. When creating new borders, add as much humus-rich organic matter as you can into any planting areas—it’s far easier to do this at the outset of your garden-making, when you have room to work and make a mess. And if you are creating paths or borders with straight lines, then take the time to get them truly straight—a wonky straight line will annoy you for years to come.

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  • Story 2: Obsessed With Skinny

    Story 2: Obsessed With Skinny

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    “It’s easier said than done” didn’t occur to her when she had listed a couple of things she’d like to achieve before the year would end. Racheal would wake up in the morning each day of her life-switching characters. It was only because she let herself drown in her imagination. A session’s break, Racheal felt it in her she had to be a lot. I would know five languages, I’d be a programmer too and create a spell bee game and oh! oh! I’ll be a gymnast, oh no it’s too late I’m 16, then I’ll just be a flexible dancer. All these she had swimming in her head.

    Another day came, she had written all these things to note and made plans on how she’ll achieve them. She started immediately, waking every morning to exercises that would make her flexible enough to be a contemporary dancer. The first training was fun, the renaissance of when she was younger and aspirer to be a gymnast. She felt fulfilled The day kept riding, she went to her study was she sat and thought. It would be easier for her to start with French since she had a background.

    The urge to learn fast French and move on to Russian, Hindi, Swahili, and Japanese was at its peak. So she cluttered her plans with French studies so she could start a journey with another. The holiday seemed to be getting shorter for Rachel each day, days will pass by and she would be as exhausted as someone who had an assembly line job. She knew she was getting somewhere. All the tasks that Rachel was facing were invisible to her father. Rachel did want it that way, her father would ask her what she wanted to occupy her the holiday. She was glad to the heart whenever he asked, so she always said programming, computer programming. Her father agreed. A week before she had herself to program, she was touched and felt the need to include reading novels into her daily routine. So she did. The week came to start her programming lessons, ever since she’d wake up in the morning sober because of the days to come.

    A day was spent from bed to painful stretching, to house chores, learning French for at least an hour, reading a novel, sorting homework from lessons, going out to lessons, and coming back to sort problems she couldn’t handle during lessons. A month and a half had gone, she still wasn’t close to being picturesquely flexible. As per her dancing, she knew she just couldn’t. Why? She failed in a dance routine she felt was Margarita Mamun worthy. She had told her brother a few weeks back to cover the dance routine, when she watched it she felt irritated and saddened about the fact that her moves were cheap, too poor to match dancers who failed on TV. She imagined herself performing so beautifully but it dawned on her that however she tried, she couldn’t. She wasn’t willing to give up so easily, so she sought for a photoshoot of some moves instead of a video.

    This time she thought it will be Sofie Dossie worthy. The ones her brother shot demured, she didn’t like them. She saw how ugly she looked, and how taut she was in the photo as compared to many others who made flawlessly effortless moves and shot them. She cried. Her daily routine still went on the same, she was tired of the lessons. She couldn’t create her own code to solve a problem, all she did was memorize already created codes to solve them. A month was left for the holiday she realized she couldn’t. She felt it was inane, she wasted her father’s money and her time all because of her greediness for dreams. She gave up on the programming. It was time for French in her routine, she felt progress though one can call her learning progressively slow. After an hour she leaned on the couch to break, she hadn’t watched TV in some time. She scrolled through channels, then she saw one which all they displayed were models on runways with flashy weird looking clothes.

    The clothes didn’t intrigue her all that did was their bony eminences. She envied their frames immediately, that’s were her obsession submerged. She developed an anorexic habit. Three weeks before school, she decided to shoot by herself some moves. She edited them and felt pleased though it was bland. She thought so because they weren’t as rare. Everyone has seen someone split, it’s almost like all slim people can do it. But she was proud because in the future she could tell someone what she was able to do. After the shoot she removed the exercises from her routine, she felt relieved. Rachel sat in the study as it was another frustrating lesson, she had been sitting for hours trying to get a code. Brief suggestions of how to start making money caressed her thoughts.

    So she stopped her work for a while and thought of award money from excellent academic work. Money from there wasn’t certain, so she thought of being a writer. Days later she discovered screenwriting and started with a script ‘Do as I Died’. Her progress with the novels was evident, she was reading her third novel. Though she knew she didn’t read them anymore for fun but all to achieve reading three novels during the holiday. She was happy but it wasn’t fun for her anymore.

    Her goals weren’t fun anymore only stressful. Her love for a model’s body grew as well as for screenwriting though she had a blurry vision of how her first script would turn out. The screenwriting was moving on as she loved, she was glad and grateful to have a new passion. The discovery of a screenwriting competition made her jitter. She was optimistic about it, she wanted to meet deadlines too.

    She thought the entry was free. The holiday was over, back to school she was. Two months passed and she was almost done with the script, she finished two days before due time. She was happy and eager to submit. She went to the site to do so, only to discover the entry was not free. She had the money, but she would starve if she used it. It saddened her that if her script was worthy enough she would have starved herself, but she knew it wasn’t, it was her first. The editing wasn’t even to standard, she rushed to conclude the story. What pained her most was she knew the bragability of being a screenwriter so she flaunted what she hadn’t been.

    She decided to start all over, learn more. She wasn’t willing to let it go that’s when she realized how passionate she was about it. She was regaining herself, but she had not the idea of how she was losing her skinniness. When she left school for home, she knew. It didn’t mind her, body frames didn’t mind her. All she wanted to achieve at home now was to read because she hadn’t written her exams yet. Social media came to play in her life, minute influences from school too.

    On Instagram, she would see pretty skinned ladies with curvy bodies. All that came to her mind then was curves, curves, and curves. She desired a curvy body, every woman’s dream, she tried. A week of no progress discouraged her, she went back to skinny desires. When she resumed for school the following year, she made herself manage her body. She really loved to eat, she was watchful enough to maintain her weight but she couldn’t lose it. The outbreak of a virus made her return home before due time. Rachel became more obsessed with skinny. She promised herself the holiday to be skinny, not only that but to learn French, read as much as she could. It was no doubt her obsession with skinny was more. Her weight goal was forty-four kg, she reduced her meals.

    Exercises were added to her daily routine, her envy for skinny girls grew more. Whenever she ate she felt guilty, she avoided something she loved most, food. Rachel stalked models on Instagram and would envy their skinny bodies. She was so determined to be skinny but it was killing her. Sometimes she overate and her weight would be back to original. Whenever she starved she would feel so proud. All she now desired was skinny. One day she stepped on her scale, disappointment was all over her atmosphere. So she made her self a challenge, she gave herself seven days to be on forty four kg.

    She was ready to starve. On the first day of the challenge she fasted, when it was time to eat, she overate. Then it came to her that she wouldn’t lose weight. Everything was vanity piled with futility. Days came and went, days when she cried her self to sleep, days when she starved and her stomach would grumble in pain. Tears that streaked her face as she cried weren’t because she didn’t see change, but she hadn’t herself one achievement. So many dreams but not one came by to visit in reality.

    The seven-day challenge she tasked herself was over. She was too sad to realize she’d been starving. Every time she ate the food she congruently ate guilt. Guilt that she would gain weight. Her obsession was prime. She gave up. The challenge was over and she didn’t feel different. The body she saw in the mirror was a mirage, what she thought was what she saw. Rachel had got lean over the seven days, the bone skinny she was obsessed with was her but she had not known.

    Rachel’s body was now a sequitur of how she felt. One morning she mounted her scale, she was forty-three kg, at first she felt her eyes weren’t frank with her. She called her brother, he confirmed what she saw. She became idyllic, for once she felt she owned the world. Ever since then, she watched models without envy but it’s typical Rachel to develop obsessions. Only time would tell. One can say that a tiny bit of urges created for Rachel an unconscienced success story.

    Lesson learned:

    To have a success story means to have dreams, dreams are abstract. It’s up to one to realise them.

    About the Writer:

    Sola M.W. is a young Nigerian and an aspiring screenwriter.

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  • Story 4 – Could I Be To Blame?

    Story 4 – Could I Be To Blame?

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    I’ve been following up with a guy on social media for months without him noticing me. It was on a Wednesday, 20th April 2017 when he buzzed me. I was so surprised and eager to reply, so we got to talk and know each other better. We hooked up, not once, not twice. I liked this guy a lot, maybe because I never get the kind of attention he gave me.

    We often met at his friend’s house and most times I just can’t hold back my admiration for him. Most times I went home dripping in my pants, I’m not a fan of touching myself so I just sleep it off and wait to see him again. On the 6th of July 2017. He invited me over to his house. I got funny advice from my friend to learn to be seductive with my dressings, so I went with a short gown. I got to his apartment, he offered me a soft drink and meat pie. Then he sat close to me, touched my thigh, I turned and looked at him, he smiled at me and drew close to kiss me. It was deep and sensitive. I wanted more of that and as he pleased my envy, he became more touchy, and gave me a look ‘if it was cool with me’.

    I wanted more added to his touch. I left that day fulfilled, I had gotten what I wanted to. It always played back, he was so good. I turned it to an almost everyday thing. I meet him every time I had a chance to. I don’t know who thinks sex keeps a man, but it was what I thought, so I saw someone I like, I went for it. A couple of months went and I’d found out I’ve missed my period, I didn’t want to tell him so I kept it for a little longer.

    Three months went, I saw signs of pregnancy, it then dawned on me that I was pregnant. I had to tell him. I met him at the mall, even in this situation I was dripping once again in my panties. I told him after we talked about his business trips and all that. He looked me straight in the eyes and said: “Rose, I’m not ready for a child yet”. I know he’s not ready but what would do you have me do, I am four months gone. I couldn’t yell but I need us to talk. I’m just a student, soon enough my parents will find out. I expected more from him, but he said he’d see me the next day, and that was how we ended the conversation.

    Immediately he left, I called my friend, she agreed to meet up so I waited. It wasn’t long when Jessica got to the mall, I was in tears, she was someone I told everything. I wanted to get the burden of having a child. I knew someone who’d do it cheaply, so I had Jessica join me at the clinic. The doctor there told me it was difficult for a four-month-old, he added: “ If you want me to continue it will hurt a lot”.

    I signed up for an abortion for the first time in my life, Jessica was there with the comforting words so I was okay to do this. It wasn’t long, we were done. I was hurting a lot more than he explained it would. The pains were not just from the termination, my heart spoke in volumes. My body couldn’t carry a much greater burden. Nonetheless, I had Jessica see me home and tell my mum that I was suffering from menstrual cramps. I know you wonder how she believed. She trusts me a lot to not let her down. But I did the opposite.

    He called, the next day, I told him what I had done already, he was very angry. He went on to say he wanted to let his family know first and come back to meet mine, I screwed it all up. I should have just waited, but I didn’t, I moved too fast. I was foolish enough to continue seeing him, after all, that happened, this was a fresh year so I was thinking he’d ask me to be his girlfriend because we got a lot serious. One day, I visited unannounced, I don’t usually do this but I did because I thought we are in a relationship already. I knocked and waited for his response but he didn’t respond so I knocked a little harder before I heard keys jiggle from the other end, he opened the door and I noticed something.

    He was not happy to see me, he unlocked the door and I came in, I could hear a lady’s voice coming from his sitting room, could be his sister so I calmed myself. This lady sat on the other couch chewing gum, in my favorite polo of him. I said hi and sat down. He came in to introduce me as his friend to his girlfriend. I was dumbfounded, speechless. It was hard for me, it felt like I’ve wasted my life with him, only to find out he loves someone that is not me, you are allowed to feel my pain and anger. I left grieving, this was a lot more to bare, here I was thinking he was mine, with all the things we’ve done and gone through. I just vowed not to ever cross path with him again. He called a couple of times to apologize, he kept saying he wanted to tell me about her and all that, but I was thought she was better at it than me, that was why he didn’t choose me. Love is the true key to anyone. With all that had happened, I moved on this time trying to find a partner.

    I took ill on the 30th of January, 2020. I had pneumonia, but before that, I went for check-up and was advised by my doctor to go through a series of tests to know about my blood type. I came back to him with all results and the first question he asked me was if I’ve heard of the rhesus factor, it was something new to me. He went on to explain the Rhesus factor is an inherited protein found on the surface of red blood cells. If your blood has the protein, you’re Rh-positive. If your blood lacks the protein, you’re Rh-negative. Now he said I’m O negative and if at any point I get pregnant and give birth I’d have to take an injection called Anti-D administration to aid me to take in for the next child.

    This was too much for me to take in as he went on to explain if the baby turns negative then there is a chance but if the baby is positive it is advised to use the injections. I left his office with hate in my heart because I remembered my actions a few years back. I took twins out, who was I going to tell, I needed to talk to someone, I called him and told him everything, he was only apologetic, it was his fault. I had just ruined my future by my own hands, who do I start that family I’ve always dreamed about?

    He called once in a while to check on me. How do you do that when you clearly choose someone over me and still put me in a big mess. I stopped replying his messages, I was done with everything I had for him, I’ll just pick myself up and look forward, he was never for me, I just let myself ruin me and I have me to be blamed.

    This is a lesson I learned the hard way that I am to be blamed for the decisions I make. And to be responsible for my actions. As young adults, we should also know everything concerning our health including blood type. Don’t make drastic decisions that will hurt others.

    About the Writer:

    Onyekaba Chidimma Amarachi is a young Igbo girl, residing in Abia state, Nigeria. Also a student of Abia state university from the discipline of History and International Relations. She enjoys writing, going out, and making new friends.

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  • Story 3: The Journey To My Goal

    Story 3: The Journey To My Goal

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    Growing up we all had that big dream that we hope to achieve, feeling like nothing can go wrong. We all had ambitions and choices of occupation we wanted in the future. Some of us even had the schools we wanted to attend charted out, the age we would begin our dream job, the age we would love the get married, all of it well planned out. But sometimes life just has a different plan waiting for us.

    Story 3: The Journey To My Goal

    My name is Ejiogu Stella Mmesoma, I am a Nigerian of the Igbo origin. I had big plans and dream of becoming a great lawyer, I didn’t exactly have a reason except for the part that I love the profession and admired those who were successful in it. I was always told that to become a successful lawyer I had to be diligent in my studies. Luckily I was quite intelligent so I did my best to put in hard work in order to be the best.

    This rule worked smoothly from my kindergarten to my senior secondary. I was known as one of the best students in my grade. I graduated from high school in 2017 at the age of 15 although I was going to turn 16 by December. I wrote my WAEC and Jamb and came out with good results. All that was left .was to write and pass my Post UTME in the school I wished to attend, the University of Lagos, Nigeria.

    I registered for the Post UTME and prepared so hard for the exam, but after a while, I was informed that to qualify for the examination I should be at 16 years old by October. Unfortunately, my birthday was December and they refused to make any exceptions. I was disappointed and sad but I had no other choice but to apply for another school where I wrote my Post Utme and passed. But as life would have it, the cutoff marks for the courses were released and I didn’t qualify to study Law. I had hoped for another course but I wasn’t given any. This resulted in me waiting for another year.

    When it was time for the next Jamb and Post UTME, after seeking advice from friends and family I applied for law again but this time the school was located in the East, Abia state university, somewhere I never thought I would school. I passed my jamb and Post UTME and this time I reached the cutoff mark to study law. But when the list of students who were admitted came out, my name wasn’t there. At this point, I was in shock and pain and I wondered if this was where my dream would crash.

    Either way, I made a decision to buy the supplementary form and changed my course to history and international relations. This was a tough decision because I completely despised history, I had no idea if I would do well in this field but it was closer to achieve my goal of becoming an international lawyer, or so I thought. After I applied for the course, I was offered admission a week after.

    Surprisingly, I found the course intriguing despite the fact I didn’t like history. I told myself I would do well in this course in order to reach my goal. After my first year of studying the course, my results were excellent but I lost morale to be an International lawyer when I was told that I could not specialize in international law using the international relations degree but only a law degree. The new information completely broke me, so much that I almost gave up on the course in order to study law. But I was encouraged by my family to complete the course and then study law, so I would be privileged to have two degrees.

    The advice given to me was wonderful but I would never have thought I would spend nine years in school. Nevertheless, I knew that both courses had their benefits, so I took their advice and I’m currently working hard to complete my current course with a high CGP and then study law.

    Lesson learned

    My lesson from this experience is in line with the saying that “when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade.” I learnt to make the best out of life and out of every experience . Life comes with challenges and once we take control of those challenges, it won’t be so scary anymore.

    Make the best out of life, it may have its challenges but we should learn to see the good in it.

    About the writer:

    Ejiogu Stella is an International Relations Bachelor’s Degree student at Abia State University, Nigeria.

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