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A new documentary, “Hunted By My Husband: The Untold Story of the D.C. Sniper,” tells the story of Mildred Muhammad and her abuse tied to the sniper spree.
More than 20 years later, people around the D.C. region still remember the D.C. sniper killings — the randomness, the terror and the weekslong manhunt.
But what’s often forgotten is one of the motives behind the spree — the end of an abusive marriage and a man’s quest to kill his ex-wife and make it look just as random.
A new documentary, out Tuesday, seeks to highlight the roots of that murderous rampage and offer support to those still trapped in abusive relationships.
“Hunted By My Husband: The Untold Story of the D.C. Sniper” airs on the Investigation Discovery Channel as part of Domestic Violence Awareness Month and the network’s No Excuse for Abuse campaign.
“I am constantly erased from the story,” Mildred Muhammad told WTOP. “I am hopeful that the audience will understand, much more than what they do, that abuse happens before the violence does.”
The documentary describes sniper John Allen Muhammad’s abuse toward his ex-wife, Mildred, she said. It also includes commentary from “other experts that are going into great detail to explain to the audience what cohesive control looks like based upon the examples that I give that I experienced in my story.”
She said abusive relationships leave behind more than physical scars. In fact, she said, many victims don’t have those.
“We really concentrate on the 20%, which is physical violence, but we rarely concentrate on the 80%, which is domestic abuse,” Mildred said. “I’m just trying to help others to understand that there is a difference in how we can go about helping everybody to break this cycle of domestic abuse and violence.”
She’s hoping someone trapped in an abusive situation knows they don’t have to suffer alone, and that it’s not their fault.
“The abuser knows exactly what he or she is doing and every act is intentional,” she said.
Far too often, she said, people who learn of abusive relationships ask the wrong questions.
“Stop asking the victim, ‘Why do you stay?’ And start asking the abuser, ‘Why do you abuse?’ When you ask the victim, ‘Why do you stay?’ you are putting the total responsibility of the relationship on to the victim, as if that person left, the abuse will stop,” Mildred said. “Well, I left and he found me in the D.C. area. The better question would be, ‘What has the abuser done that has created obstacles for you to leave safely?’”
More help can be found at the Domestic Abuse Hotline: 800-799-7233.
Today, Mildred said she and her three children are completely healed and thriving. But she said getting there wasn’t easy.
“Unfortunately, at the time, the only counselors I was running into were the ones who wanted to be famous and use our story to bring notability to themselves,” she said. “So I went to the library, I got a book on counseling, and I learned how to counsel me and my children myself.”
She said it wasn’t just about helping herself through the trauma. As a mother she also had to worry about helping her kids heal, which often meant putting their needs and emotions first.
“The older ones always remember what the younger ones don’t,” Mildred said. “I always reminded them that regardless of what anybody says — doesn’t matter what your dad has done, he is still your dad. … Whatever you want to know about him, I will tell you the good, the bad and the indifferent. Even if it’s harmful to me, because I need you to know the truth. So we dealt with the truth.”
Mildred continues to speak out and she also hosts a podcast called “Rising Above It All with Mildred Muhammad.”
The documentary, “Hunted By My Husband: The Untold Story of the D.C. Sniper,” premiers at 9 p.m. Tuesday.
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John Domen
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