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Tag: emotions

  • How to Purge Toxic Emotions to Facilitate Healing | Entrepreneur

    How to Purge Toxic Emotions to Facilitate Healing | Entrepreneur

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    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    What are toxic emotions, and how do they prevent healing and moving forward? Toxic emotions are negative feelings that manifest within our bodies, minds and spirit. They become harmful when they lead us into a victim state, from which it can be challenging to get out and can cause mental and physical harm. Learning to control certain emotions is imperative, especially when moving on from divorce and other traumas to create a new and happy life.

    The most common negative emotions associated with trauma and difficult life situations are fear, anger, guilt, and sadness/grief. Experiencing these or other negative emotions is normal in most cases. For example, divorce is comparable to a death, and there is a significant separation between the “we” of the partnership and the new “me.” We had entwined our lives with one another, including dreams and a future, so when suddenly one is no longer part of a “we,” it can be traumatic and lead to toxic emotions. Similarly, any time we feel down, negative or unhappy in life, toxic emotions can keep us stuck and unable to heal. The lesson is to prevent the feelings from becoming toxic.

    Related: 12 Ways Successful People Handle Toxic People

    Since it is normal to experience negative emotions about trauma or difficult life events, the first rule of thumb is to let yourself feel them, whatever they may be. Grieve, feel angry, sad, hurt, afraid, guilty or lost…these feelings must be recognized. You might cry, punch a pillow, exercise hard, scream or whatever non-dangerous release helps to relieve tension caused by these feelings. If the feelings are dangerous, cause you to feel so helpless that you cannot function, or have thoughts of hurting yourself or another or of ending your life, you must seek professional help immediately.

    At some point – a time that can be different for each person – you must let go of these feelings and move forward.

    Fear

    This is one of the biggest emotions suffered by those going through trauma. It can also plague those who face difficult times, like losing a job or a home or the death of a loved one. Worrying about what a new life will look like post-trauma is easy. Where will you live? How will you pay the bills? In the case of divorce, a stay-at-home parent may have to return to the workforce for the first time in years, which is scary.

    Being alone is also scary — who will care for you when you are sick or need help? What about parenting responsibilities, the desire to ease the effects of divorce on children and coming up with a plan to co-parent amicably? There is also a fear of being alone for the rest of one’s life (this is especially true with women and even has a name).

    No matter what the trauma or life circumstance that leads to toxic emotions, when we feel afraid and stuck, it actually prevents us from being able to heal, and the longer we nurse this fear within our bodies, minds and spirits, the more troubles we may suffer, both physically and mentally. You may recall a time in your life (even childhood) when you were so afraid of something or someone that you got a stomachache or experienced other forms of stress — imagine what can happen over time when we let fear fester – it’s like an open wound that does not get cleaned and treated.

    Related: 8 Ways to Harness the Power of Fear for Personal Success

    Anger

    Anger is another common emotion experienced by those who experience trauma and big life changes. Since many people do not understand how to start the healing process, blaming others or the universe for their fate becomes easier. With divorce, many will blame the former spouse rather than start looking within for the answers. Blaming equates to a refusal to take responsibility for the self and one’s own happiness, leading to stagnation and the inability to heal and be happy.

    Anger zaps our energy, and it can lead us to a victim state. In this state, we believe everything happens to us instead of realizing we are the only ones who have control over our own lives, we become incapable of taking the reins and turning our lives around. Angry emotions can elevate blood pressure and lead to a plethora of physical and mental/emotional ailments, like poor focus and lack of energy, bodily pains and depression, rapid weight gain or loss, the desire to hurt oneself or others, extreme exhaustion, and lack of motivation, to name a few. This is not the way to heal or be happy.

    Related: 8 Toxic Personalities Every Successful Person Avoids

    Guilt

    Many traumas or difficult situations can lead to feelings of guilt. Divorce is one example, especially when we have been programmed to believe it is wrong or bad and that marriage lasts forever. Many have grown up with these messages from religion, culture or familial beliefs. Sometimes, we may not even recognize that what we have been taught, often throughout our lives, has a limiting effect on our thoughts.

    Guilt is normal when it comes to divorce, and it is important to let oneself feel it and recognize from where it comes so that we can change our mindset and accept that those lessons we were taught are not reality. This usually involves diving deep into the past, especially childhood traumas.

    When feeling guilty for being the “cause” of a trauma or major life change, that mindset must be examined and altered. Using divorce as an example, a marriage is a partnership, and even if one of the parties does things that do not support the marriage, there are still two people involved; both parties need to be working together in the relationship – all the time. Most marriages break down long before divorce is filed; one study indicated that the time frame is six years.

    Other situations and traumas can also lead to feelings of guilt, such as physical and verbal abuse. Many victims of abuse feel that they must have done something wrong to trigger the abusive behavior that is directed toward them, and this, along with fear (of retaliation, of being alone, of the partner going to prison, etc.), is the reason that many victims of abusive relationships do not leave.

    Sadness and grief

    These are the most common toxic emotions regarding trauma, loss and big life changes. For example, it is normal to feel sad and grieve the death of a marriage or a loved one. Embarking upon the healing journey will alleviate these feelings. Although they never go away completely, they will dissipate with healing, and it is possible to create a new life and be happy despite the circumstances or changes.

    Preventing negative feelings from becoming toxic is within our control, and we can learn how to overcome the barriers. Each step has many subparts that may require help from a divorce coach or therapist.

    Related: How to Turn Your Work-Related Stress and Anxiety into Accomplishments

    Steps to overcome negativity and toxicity to focus on healing

    1. Let go of people, ideas and situations that don’t serve you
    2. Get healthy – body, mind and spirit (healthy eating, exercise, breathwork, journaling, spending time in nature).
    3. Express gratitude (especially when you awaken and before bed. Think of at least 3-5 things for which you are grateful)
    4. Try something new by getting out of your comfort zone (take a class, volunteer, learn something – outside of the house, not from a computer)
    5. Focus on the present, not the past — the past is over, and nothing can be done to change it, so don’t waste energy on how it could have been if only…
    6. Replace negative thoughts and actions with positive ones, repeating until it becomes the norm – start telling yourself you are what you want to be by using affirmations, journaling, meditation and doing activities that make you happy; we are what we believe ourselves to be!
    7. Evaluate your support network and make sure you have the right people – many of those within our support networks do not truly support us. Those who love you need to respect your choices and not try to tell you what they think you should or shouldn’t do.

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    Rachel S. Ruby

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  • Study: Living Happy Life Strongly Correlated To Thinking About Property Values All The Time

    Study: Living Happy Life Strongly Correlated To Thinking About Property Values All The Time

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    AUSTIN, TX—Discovering a clear link between obsessively reflecting on appreciating assets and overall contentment, a study published Monday by the University of Texas found that living a happy life was strongly correlated to thinking about property values all the time. “Our data clearly indicates a direct relationship between the amount of time someone spends refreshing Zillow listings for properties in their area and the amount of fulfillment they have in their lives,” said head researcher and economist Lyle Granger, explaining that rates of personal satisfaction skyrocket every time one attends a city council meeting to rail against subsidized housing units because of what they might do to home prices in the area. “When thinking about happiness, it’s important not to consider neighborliness or solidifying your bond with your community, but to think instead of how the race and socioeconomic background of those living around you will affect the resale value of your house in 30 years.” Granger emphasized that everything in one’s life would fall into place as long as one maintained a singular focus on home values.

    Pope Francis Declares Nothing Wrong With Guy Giving Buddy Tug Job After Few Drinks

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  • How to Lead With Emotional Intelligence in 2023 | Entrepreneur

    How to Lead With Emotional Intelligence in 2023 | Entrepreneur

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    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    With Covid-19 firmly in the rear-view mirror in most parts of the world, entrepreneurs are now developing creative ways to mold inclusive and healthy work environments for employees. Rocky economic forecasts make this even more vital as companies double down on profitability overgrowth. Stay caught up; join the wise employers who swear by leading with emotional intelligence.

    What is emotional intelligence? Emotional intelligence is the ability or quality that enables leaders to confront challenges with patience, insight and control. Through emotional intelligence, leaders achieve a higher level of problem-solving in the work environment. The ability to identify and monetize opportunities is also improved through emotional intelligence. Here are a few ways to pivot 2023 output by leading with emotional intelligence.

    Related: Use These 7 Emotional Intelligence Tips to Be a Better Leader

    How to lead with emotional intelligence

    1. Embrace diversity:

    Diversity in the workplace is synonymous with variety in the human body. We each rely on copious amounts of biological systems, cogs and energy to stay alive and thrive. Every cell in your body varies slightly from the next, and so does the workforce. Each employee is different in their unique way. As a leader, it is important to embrace each employee with their eccentricities without judgment or victimization.

    2. Prioritize the needs of your employees:

    The best way to create a positive work environment is by considering your employee’s needs at every step. Employees are more likely to perform exceptionally in 2023 when they feel their needs are being met.

    3. Practice self-awareness:

    Self-awareness is recognizing how your emotions impact your behavior, particularly toward your employees. Leaders who lack self-awareness often have a high employee turnover. According to a study performed by Georgetown University, the average employee lost commitment to their jobs due to low emotional intelligence displayed by leaders.

    The best way to develop self-awareness is by closely examining your behavior and attitude toward employees. How do you react when slighted? Are you calm and collected, or do you fly into a rage? Introspection will open your eyes to your flaws; if it does not work, you can always ask your employees for feedback.

    3. Keep emotions in check:

    Let’s face it, life is not always a walk in the park, especially when running a company. However, when dealing with employees, you must keep your emotions in check. A huge part of emotional intelligence is learning to identify different emotions you are experiencing. If you notice you get angry often, try and deal with the situation without reacting emotionally. Instead, employ facts and empathy to deal with the situation and see how it goes.

    4. Learn new concepts:

    Learning is a lifelong journey for everyone looking to keep growing. Learning new ways to manage situations as a leader is a fantastic way to keep your employees satisfied. Show your subordinates that you are making an effort to change, and they will be grateful and more cooperative in their daily tasks. Some new concepts you can pick to help with emotional intelligence include the art of meditating and empathy.

    5. Journal:

    Journaling is a fantastic way to express your thoughts and emotions, giving them form. Through journaling, you can identify wanting behavior and also learn about critical triggers in your daily life. Once you know where you are going wrong, you can swiftly devise a plan of action to improve your behavior for the company’s sake.

    6. Learn to communicate effectively:

    Excellent and practical communication skills are among the more positive byproducts of emotional intelligence. However, excellent communication skills can sometimes be used to achieve higher emotional intelligence. As a leader, your communication skills must always be on point. When it comes to communication, everything from the tone to how you say something matters. When it comes to communication, it is not always one size fits all, so you need to learn how to approach each employee for maximum impact.

    Related: Emotional Intelligence is the Secret to Leadership in Times of Crisis

    The benefits of emotional intelligence

    1. Reduced employee turnover:

    Emotionally intelligent people can maintain a level head in high-stress situations. They can see the reality for what it is by reading through numerous guises employees put up. In the highly competitive business industry, employers struggle to keep good talent, and emotional mastery is one of the top tools to achieve this goal.

    2. Improved output:

    A leader with high emotional intelligence can make all employees feel like they belong. When employees feel a sense of fitting in, they are more than likely to put in extra effort toward daily tasks. In the current challenging economic times, companies are placing more value on output and profitability, which makes this benefit even more valuable to your business.

    3. Better teamwork:

    Like other forms, emotional intelligence can be transferred through practice and teaching. Showing your team emotional intelligence will likely rub off and create better teamwork. People with high emotional intelligence communicate better within their teams, making them work better together.

    4. Creates a healthy working environment:

    In a work environment where leaders have high emotional intelligence, the employees enjoy a healthy work environment. Employees are also more likely to enjoy longer and more fruitful careers. A leader with a high emotional quotient (EQ) can maintain excellent relationships within the company, encouraging teamwork and innovation. Employees also enjoy growth opportunities with the support of said leaders who nurture and support the employee’s interests.

    The data is in, and the numbers strongly suggest that leading with emotional intelligence allows you and your company to identify and grab more opportunities. 2023 is the year you should add emotional intelligence to your wheelhouse, for posterity’s sake. Harness the exponential potential hidden in emotional intelligence, and make 2023 your best-performing year yet.

    Related: How to Raise Your Emotional Intelligence in 3 Steps

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    Steve Taplin

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  • How to Build a Culture of Emotional Intelligence

    How to Build a Culture of Emotional Intelligence

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    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    It’s no secret that emotional intelligence is a valuable skill for business leaders. However, many CEOs struggle to cultivate it within their team. Read along as we discuss the benefits of emotional intelligence in the workplace and how to develop it to enhance your leadership skills and business strategy.


    Shivendu Jauhari | Getty Images

    What is emotional intelligence?

    Emotional intelligence is “the ability to perceive, interpret, demonstrate, control, evaluate and use emotions to communicate with and relate to others effectively and constructively. Some experts suggest that emotional intelligence is more important than IQ for success in life,” (Verywell Mind).

    Utilizing emotional intelligence can help facilitate open communication and strengthen relationships between executives, managers and employees, creating an improved work culture overall. It’s important for leaders to not only know how to foster emotional intelligence within themselves but how to encourage it from their team as well.

    Related: 5 Ways Emotional Intelligence Will Make You a Better Leader

    5 pillars of emotional intelligence

    In his bestselling book, Emotional Intelligence, psychologist and author Daniel Goleman crafts a framework in which leaders can leverage five key traits to successfully implement emotional intelligence in the workplace. These traits are influenced both by experience and intuitiveness. The five pillars are:

    1. Self-awareness:

    Our emotions do not only affect us, they affect those around us as well. The ability to recognize your own emotional state and its impact on others is a skill that can be developed over time. For example, employees may be reluctant to ask for help if they can see that their boss is already stressed out with other tasks. While you should not hide your emotions, it’s important to be cognizant of how they come across to others.

    2) Self-regulation:

    Though we can’t always control our emotions, we can control the way we react to them. Self-regulation (impulse control) is critical to maintaining good relationships in the workplace. Leaders who are able to check themselves before reacting are better able to handle difficult situations and are more respectable.

    Self-regulation also promotes accountability as it helps create a clear set of expectations for how to act in the workplace.

    3) Motivation:

    Goleman writes, “Leadership is not domination, but the art of persuading people to work toward a common goal.”

    Motivating your employees is perhaps the most important action toward achieving alignment within your team. When all team members are motivated and focused on the same goal, you are more likely to hit your targets. Motivate your employees by setting clear objectives, celebrating wins and victories, and recognizing individual contributions.

    4. Empathy:

    Empathic leaders are able to put themselves in other people’s shoes and act with fairness. They are generally well-liked by employees, as they are more understanding and able to relate on a personal level. Having empathy does not just mean caring about others — it means being able to recognize others’ emotions even when they are not forthcoming and being able to conduct conversations appropriately with the other person’s emotional state in mind.

    A study by the Center for Creative Leadership found that “managers who practiced empathetic leadership toward direct reports were viewed as better performers by their bosses.” Empathic leadership is not restricted to C-suite executives — managers and other level employees can benefit from practicing empathy at work.

    5. Social skills:

    Social skills like active listening and verbal/nonverbal communication will lead to stronger trust among a team. Leaders with social skills are better communicators and know how to work with different types of people. Effective communication is one of the most important skills for a leader to have and proves useful when addressing issues or tough topics. Having good social skills also makes leaders appear more approachable to their team members, enabling positive working relationships and an effective feedback loop.

    Related: Use These 7 Emotional Intelligence Tips to Be a Better Leader

    Benefits of emotional intelligence in the workplace

    Exhibiting emotional intelligence in your business can lead to countless improvements, from enhanced performance to a better culture. We’ve outlined a few of the main benefits below:

    • Team alignment: Rally your team members around a common goal. This creates cohesiveness across the board and helps ensure no boxes in your strategic execution are left unchecked.

    • Increased productivity: Employees will work harder and faster with the right motivation. They will be encouraged to ask questions for clarity and explore new ideas as they work toward the specified company goals.

    • Increased transparency and accountability: Emotional awareness is a desirable trait among leaders when it comes to the way employees see them. This prompts them to be more open and truthful with their team, creating opportunities for increased transparency in the company. By being upfront about certain initiatives, metrics and company information, leaders gain trust and understanding from their team. Establishing this kind of transparency and accountability helps fill in gaps and ensures that the right people are working toward the right goals.

    • Better communication: Communication is king when it comes to getting anything done as a team, and it’s easier to communicate when you know how you feel. Emotionally intelligent leaders are able to effectively express what is needed in a way that can be understood by others. They are also good listeners and know how to get a point across while also taking into account the other person’s viewpoints and opinions. This ties into the pillar of self-regulation, as being able to control impulsive responses is another important part of effective communication.

    Related: How to Cultivate Higher Emotional Intelligence in Your Employees

    Steps to improve emotional intelligence in your organization

    It’s no coincidence that the five pillars of emotional intelligence are also key traits of a good leader. It’s important for leaders to not only exhibit traits of emotional intelligence but also to recognize and celebrate them within their team. So, how can leaders cultivate emotional intelligence?

    1. Show appreciation:

    It’s easy for executives to overlook the importance of employee appreciation, even though the smallest gestures can make a huge difference. When employees are happy, the whole business benefits. Research has shown that having happy employees increases productivity, sales, employee retention, employer net promoter Scores (eNPS); the list goes on.

    Remember to give praise for a job well done and ensure your employees know their hard work does not go unnoticed. This can be as simple as a shoutout in your all-hands team meeting or a handwritten “thank-you” note. When employees receive praise, they feel valued. And when they feel valued, they are more motivated to work hard and deliver exceptional results.

    2. Practice what you preach:

    Respectable people lead by example. This includes making an effort to exhibit the positive traits that you expect to see from your team and acting in solidarity with them. In order to be effective, a team must be unified from the top down. Actions like giving thanks, admitting to wrongdoings and having an open-door policy will help create a healthier environment.

    3. Get to know yourself:

    Understanding yourself is the foundation of emotional intelligence. Self-awareness and reflection involve understanding one’s emotions, strengths, weaknesses, needs and drives. It’s a major factor in emotional regulation, as it helps provide insight into one’s emotional reactions and makes it easier to control them. Make an effort to be mindful of how you react in different situations, and get comfortable with the idea of self-reflection. This kind of reflection is not just good for enhancing your leadership skills, but for the soul as well.

    4. Get to know your people:

    You know it’s important to establish good working relationships with your coworkers, but establishing good personal relationships goes a long way, too. Knowing your employees on a personal level means being able to better understand them and their emotional states and allows you to determine how to best work with them.

    Don’t underestimate the importance of one-on-one time between CEOs/managers and team members. Having frequent and consistent 1:1 meetings helps drive performance but also provides opportunities for open communication and relationship-building. Team members are more likely to provide truthful and constructive feedback if they feel like they are being heard.

    5. Provide training:

    As mentioned, emotional intelligence is a skill that can be developed and improved with practice. It’s important to invest in emotional intelligence training and development programs if you want your team to be successful. This includes both emotional awareness and emotional regulation, as well as communication skills, decision-making skills and more.

    Developing emotional intelligence requires practice, but it can have a huge impact on the success of an organization. By recognizing emotional intelligence within your team and investing in emotional intelligence training, you can create a better working environment that leads to improved performance and higher morale.

    Emotional intelligence is not something that can be forced on people or taught overnight. It takes time and commitment from leaders, but it can have a positive and lasting impact on the team as a whole when practiced and supported regularly. It’s a valuable tool that can help business leaders be more effective, improve communication and increase trust.

    By investing in emotional intelligence, your business will be able to reap the rewards of a better-connected workforce that feels appreciated, respected and motivated to succeed.

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    Doug Walner

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  • Taming the Emotions That Come With Hepatitis C

    Taming the Emotions That Come With Hepatitis C

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    You have hepatitis C, a disease caused by a virus that’s contagious and attacks the liver. Maybe you know how you got it. Maybe you don’t.

    Whatever the case, the virus could be just part of the problem. Now that the doctor has told you that you have hep C, get ready to battle a range of head-spinning emotions that often can be as difficult to deal with as the virus itself.

    There are ways to calm your nerves and ease your mind.

    What You’re Facing

    Fear and anxiety: Most people with hepatitis C don’t have any symptoms. Even if you’ve had it for years, you may not have the fever, fatigue, nausea, vomiting, and other things that some folks with the virus have.

    Still, doctors will tell you that hepatitis C is a serious disease that can cause lasting damage to the liver, including cancer and a scarring of the liver (cirrhosis). Hepatitis C is, in a word, scary.

    “I think fear is probably the first thing: ‘What does it mean?’ ” says Lucinda K. Porter, RN, author of two books about her experience with hep C.

    “If you don’t know anything about hepatitis C, and you go on the Internet — which a lot of people seem to go to before they go to their physicians — you might see a full variety of outcomes, including death. Or see that this is an infectious disease and get the fear you might infect someone else. That’s a huge fear.”

    The fears keep coming:

    • Is it going to be debilitating?
    • Can you infect someone else?
    • Will you be able to work?
    • How are you going to pay for your treatment?
    • How are you going to take care of your family?
    • How are you going to pay the mortgage?

    “Once you learn more, you find out that hep C doesn’t work like that,” says Porter, who works as a hepatitis C advocate, writing for hepmag.com and hcvadvocate.org. “If you find out about it in an early stage and get some good, solid information, you find out that those fears don’t usually get realized.”

    Remember: In many cases, the medicines that your doctor prescribes can pretty much wipe the virus out of your body.

    “There is nothing to be afraid of. No matter how you got the infection, now we have a group of different, good therapies that can get rid of this infection,” says Victor Machicao, MD, a gastroenterologist with McGovern Medical School at UTHealth-Houston.

    “I usually tell [people] there’s a good chance that, you start taking the treatments, you’re going to start feeling better, and by the time that we complete the therapy, you’re going to feel almost like a new person.”

    Embarrassment and shame: Hepatitis C gets spread through exposure to an infected person’s blood. That’s the only way. Often, that’s how intravenous drug users, sharing needles, spread the virus. Sometimes, it gets passed down through high-risk sex. Before 1992, when blood wasn’t screened for hepatitis C in the U.S., it often was passed along through transfusions and organ transplants, too.

    Some of those activities — drug use and high-risk sex, especially — are what many people associate with hepatitis C. That thinking creates a stigma that makes people who have the disease not want to tell others about it.

    “So many of [the people I treat] are those baby boomers who did have a brief period of experimentation with drug use. Or maybe they did use drugs for a year or two of their adolescence. But now, that’s like 30 years ago,” says Andrew Muir, MD, a hepatologist who is chief of the Division of Gastroenterology at Duke Clinical Research Institute in Durham, NC.

    “Often, they’re not married to somebody that they knew back then … it’s embarrassing, then you’re worried about what that person is going to think of you, and then when you realize that there may be a chance that you’ve passed on the virus through sex. … All these things are spiraling around in their heads.”

    Guilt: “There’s a lot of guilt, especially in someone who has a remote history of IV drug use, or got a tattoo at an unregulated parlor, or had a high-risk sexual encounter,” says Nancy Reau, MD, section chief of hepatology at Rush University Medical Center in Chicago.

    People feel guilty about the possibility that they’ve infected others unknowingly. They feel guilty about putting loved ones in a situation that is often financially and emotionally costly. Sometimes, it can be too much for a person to handle.

    Regret: People with the disease often beat themselves up for not making better choices when they contracted the virus.

    “At that point, I tell every single one of my [folks] that there’s not a single one of us that wouldn’t go back and change a decision that we’ve made,” Reau says. “To some extent, looking back isn’t going to help us. We have to look forward.”

    Anger: “Anger is not an uncommon one. Anger is one of those emotions that make us feel like we’re empowered,” says Porter, who got hepatitis C in 1988 through a blood transfusion.

    For some, it comes from the fact that they had nothing to do with what gave them the virus.

    “I didn’t react with anger because in my case, that blood transfusion saved my life. But other people … can feel quite angry, and they feel quite victimized by that. I find [this] one is probably the hardest to address. Sometimes I just acknowledge that they feel angry.”

    Depression: The virus, the symptoms that may accompany it, all the emotions — it can be difficult to handle.

    Muir says a common scenario, in his experience, is a drug user who addresses the problem of addiction, goes in for treatment, and just as things start looking better, finds out they have hepatitis C.

    “I find a lot of them are really down on themselves: ‘I’m a bad person, I did this, I’m being punished for it.’ We really need to try to change the way they feel about that,” Muir says.

    “I was a mess. I felt dirty. I was hard on myself,” says Stella Armstrong, a Las Vegas office manager who got the virus through drug use. Armstrong is now virus-free and is a hepatitis C advocate and member of the National Patient Advisory Committee for the American Liver Foundation. “I had to seek counseling. I had to see a psychiatrist. I was taking depression and anxiety medicine.”

    How to Get Help

    Talk to your medical team. Meet with your doctor and anyone else you might need (a hepatologist or pharmacist, for example). Get a plan. Follow treatment.

    “You start there. Always,” Porter says.

    Don’t underestimate the power of feeling physically better. It’s good for your mind, too.

    Once again, the virus can disappear in many of those who have hepatitis C.

    “People are surprised. They ask you, ‘Doctor, did you mean ‘cure’?” Machicao says. “They come to the office and say, ‘Doctor, that means I don’t have the infection anymore?’ I tell them, ‘For practical purposes, you’re cured.’ They are in total disbelief. It is amazing.”

    “The success of being cured of hepatitis C is really powerful,” says Muir.

    If you feel depression or anxiety, the National Institute of Mental Health suggests that you talk to your primary doctor or go to a psychologist or psychiatrist. Depression is a real illness and, even in the most severe cases, it’s treatable with medication or other means.

    Get educated. Find trusted sites online. Ask your doctor questions. Know what the virus is all about. Separate fact from fiction.

    “Education is how we start breaking down the stereotypes. How we find out we don’t need to be afraid anymore,” Porter says. “It can release the chains of anger.”

    Find some support. It can help to talk with other people who have been through what you have. Your doctor can point you toward online groups filled with people who are going through the same process. In some places, you can meet with people in person. Social services through government agencies or hospitals can help, too.

    “When you start to see other people who have a history of drug use, that regret and shame starts to diminish. ‘OK. I’m not a bad person. I can deal with this,’ ” Porter says.

    “I’ve always been open and have discussed my addiction with drugs. I think it’s the best thing. We only stay as sick as our secrets,” Armstrong says. “It was better for me to share my story. It’s still the same thing. It’s still hepatitis C, and we have to get through it.”

    Lean on family, friends, clergy, whomever it takes. Whether it’s someone else who has been through hepatitis C, or a spouse, a parent, a sibling, or your best friend — even if it’s a complete stranger — sometimes you just need a shoulder or a sympathetic ear. Search them out. Use them.

    “No matter how much positive you can hear about it, you still have to go home, you still have to be at a point by yourself, thinking these bad thoughts and you’re worried and you’re scared and you’re scared of the unknown,” Armstrong says. “Those are the times you have to call somebody and talk to them.”

    Take care of yourself. Once you get your medical plan in place, once you have your support in line, once you’re educated and know what you’re facing, taking a little “me” time is in order.

    “Having a chronic illness is hard,” Reau says. “Start by looking at the things you can change easily.”

    Eat well. Exercise. Get your sleep. Some people like to meditate. Nap if you need to nap. Make sure you’re around people you like. Enjoy a good book or a movie. All these can help you deal with the stress and emotions of hepatitis C.

    “Even at my lowest point and when I was feeling really sick, you just gotta keep moving. You have no other choice,” Armstrong says. “You have to keep moving forward and treating yourself well.”

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  • 7 Ways to Let Go of Your Anger and Live a Happier Life

    7 Ways to Let Go of Your Anger and Live a Happier Life

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    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    I don’t like my neighbor. He is old, conservative and very loud at times when our kids are sleeping. There are many more reasons, but let’s get into the real topic of this article. I eventually found ways to switch my anger and release it from my body. At some point, I just realized that it is not healthy for myself or for my family. The person who was most frustrated was me, and the other person even didn’t know it. I just realized that this is not the role model that I want to be for my kids, so I started my own journey to fix this. Here are some ways you can do it, too:

    1. Gratitude post of the week

    This became a real tradition for me! At the end of the week, I wrote a post on social media highlighting all the things that I am grateful for. Especially as entrepreneurs, we so often focus on and stress about things that need to be done, but this allowed me to focus on the real important things — my family, health and the positive relationships around me. Switching your focus from the negative to the positive things in your life should be an integrated habit in your life! By the way, this not only feels very good, but it is also a great way to stay in touch with the people I have positive relationships with because I am tagging them all, and they see my posts!

    Related: How to Transform Anger Into Constructive Action

    2. Realize the effect anger has on your body and health

    Anger is a natural emotion, but it can also have long-term side effects on our mental and physical health. Some of the short and long-term health problems that have been linked to unmanaged anger include:

    • Headache

    • Insomnia

    • Increased anxiety

    • Depression

    • High blood pressure

    • Skin problems

    • Heart attack

    When I read this list of potential issues for the first time, I just thought, “do I really want to risk any of this because of a neighbor?” So, ask yourself what you’re getting from the situations that make you angry. In most cases, you get nothing.

    3. Ask yourself: Where is this anger coming from?

    Oftentimes these strong feelings are coming from past experiences or experiences in our childhood. In my case, I repeated the fifth grade in my school, and it was a very intense experience. I had no real friends and failed in almost all subjects. At that time, I was criticized heavily and struggled when people made fun of me. To some degree, I overcompensated for this and reacted emotionally whenever I had a negative experience with someone (like the neighbor I mentioned earlier).

    So, think about where your anger may be coming from and what it may be rooted in. Analyzing and understanding your anger can help you manage it better. I also realized that anger is an important part of our emotional intelligence because it helps us to know when something in our life needs to change.

    Related: What Anger Says About You

    4. Set things in perspective

    Are you going to think about this situation in 10 years? Am I going to think about my stupid neighbor in the year 2032? Hell no! Who cares? We have plans to move to a cooler city and take cool trips, so who cares about this old guy? Setting situations in perspective like this helped me to think differently and let go of some of my anger.

    5. Get professional help, and forgive

    If you’re at a point where you feel like your anger is out of control or that it’s putting a real damper on your life and relationships, it would be a good idea to seek professional help. Qualified professionals can help you develop the skills and mindsets you need to manage these emotions.

    It’s also important to practice forgiveness as you navigate your anger. I am a big fan of Dr. Wayne Dyer, who has written many best-selling books on psychology. He is also called the father of motivation. His main message in all his books is this idea of forgiving not only other people but also yourself for the things that may have happened as a result of your anger. At the same time, it’s important to embrace the moment and live a life of growth. So, try to forgive anyone who is causing you to be angry, and then move on by focusing on your personal growth.

    Related: Seeing Red? 8 Ways to Keep Your Anger in Check

    6. Write about it, and share your experience

    I wouldn’t give my neighbor credit for it, but writing about this situation has helped me in many ways, and it also led to this article. Anger within neighbors is a common thing, and many people can relate to this, so why not share my experience and write about it? Taking the time to write about your experiences can help you feel more in control of your emotions. And sharing your experiences gives you the opportunity to receive (and give) advice, helping you and others feel less alone. Where can you publish and share your own experience?

    7. Talk about it

    Find someone you trust with whom you can speak about such experiences. In my case, it is my wife. When we speak about these situations, we find a solution together. Most often, my wife gives me ideas to focus on and execute. So, find someone you can talk with. Speaking with someone else about a struggle is better than thinking about the struggle alone in your head.

    Even with the best plan, sometimes old habits come back. Just be gentle with yourself, and remember this is a marathon and not a sprint. It takes time, and maybe you need two or more rounds to work on yourself before it really works out for you.

    Just remind yourself always that there is a reason why you feel this strong emotion. Asking the “why” question is critical and helps you to dig deep into your past. Finding the true reason and accepting this helps you to overcome the situation. Focusing on your personal growth will not only make you more self-confident but will also help you grow in your professional relationships.

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    Yakup Özkardes-Cheung

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  • Why Having Emotional Awareness Is Crucial for All Leaders

    Why Having Emotional Awareness Is Crucial for All Leaders

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    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    Nearly all entrepreneurs are looking for ways to optimize their workflow. However, it’s common for business leaders to focus on solving problems externally in their business, instead of looking within themselves. The purpose of your business should not only be to fulfill a desire for success. Moreover, it’s important that your workflow aligns with the deeper parts of who you are, what you stand for and what you wish to share with others.

    As the CEO of Jumpspeak.com, I make plenty of small to grand decisions that can impact the direction of the business. I can tell you that the bad decisions I regret making are always the ones I’ve made with high emotions.

    Business owners are on the road to burnout when they aren’t leading with service. By understanding how to be emotionally aware as a leader, you can manage your emotions and expand into a place of abundance. In this article, I will share some tips on how to enhance your leadership skills by healing your mindset, managing your emotions and leading with intention.

    Related: 5 Ways Emotional Intelligence Will Make You a Better Leader

    Manage your emotions

    As an entrepreneur, it’s difficult to create boundaries when the lines between business and personal feel so blurred. However, when you ignore your emotions, they don’t disappear. They get bottled up within you and may even create symptoms within your physical body.

    Sofia Sundari, who coaches high-performing entrepreneurs on emotional mastery, says that anger is connected to the liver, so ignoring it will only cause deeper concerns with your overall wellness. Her advice is to stop running from your emotions and let them flow. If you are present with how you feel, you are able to be present in your business. Being emotionally aware allows leaders to make decisions that are true to their core since it opens gateways to a smarter intuition.

    Reverse your scarcity mindset

    People who are givers thrive when it comes to managing an abundance mindset. It’s important to know that business is not a zero-sum game. One person’s success will not affect yours. Oftentimes, it grows the entire market demand, making everyone more successful.

    Everyone can benefit from learning to act from a place of abundance instead of scarcity, even if you have to fool yourself at times. Know that you have to walk the walk in your everyday life, which sometimes includes taxes, tipping, paying for cheaper tickets and more. When leaders emulate the leadership skills they strive to embody, they are able to step into their true authentic power.

    Think about actionable things in your business, team and personal life that you have a limiting belief about. Then try to apply the abundance framework in that exact situation. You may be pleasantly surprised to find out that there are other solutions to your problems.

    Related: 2 Keys to Improving Leaders’ Mental and Emotional Wellbeing

    It’s okay to mix business and personal

    Leaders who have an entrepreneurial spirit can struggle with maintaining both work and business relationships. The pressure leaders place on themselves ends up interfering with their ability to be intentional and emotionally aware in their work life. In Sundari’s opinion, the dynamics of intimate relationships mirror business relationships.

    She found that if her intimate relationships were going well, the business was stagnating, and vice versa. Instead of trying to keep everything separated, she made the decision to incorporate the two together, which proved successful.

    Slowly start unraveling these limiting beliefs about how you “should” operate as a leader, and lean into what makes the most sense for your personal and professional priorities. If you are aware of what you need from the start, you can fill up your own cup and ensure your business moves in the right direction.

    An emotionally blocked leader is not able to help themselves or their business, which is why it’s important to create a roadmap for how you want to show up in your professional life. Analyze the different areas of your personal and business life to ensure everything feels right for you.

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    Sean Kim

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  • Taming the Emotions That Come With Hepatitis C

    Taming the Emotions That Come With Hepatitis C

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    You have hepatitis C, a disease caused by a virus that’s contagious and attacks the liver. Maybe you know how you got it. Maybe you don’t.

    Whatever the case, the virus could be just part of the problem. Now that the doctor has told you that you have hep C, get ready to battle a range of head-spinning emotions that often can be as difficult to deal with as the virus itself.

    There are ways to calm your nerves and ease your mind.

    What You’re Facing

    Fear and anxiety: Most people with hepatitis C don’t have any symptoms. Even if you’ve had it for years, you may not have the fever, fatigue, nausea, vomiting, and other things that some folks with the virus have.

    Still, doctors will tell you that hepatitis C is a serious disease that can cause lasting damage to the liver, including cancer and a scarring of the liver (cirrhosis). Hepatitis C is, in a word, scary.

    “I think fear is probably the first thing: ‘What does it mean?’ ” says Lucinda K. Porter, RN, author of two books about her experience with hep C.

    “If you don’t know anything about hepatitis C, and you go on the Internet — which a lot of people seem to go to before they go to their physicians — you might see a full variety of outcomes, including death. Or see that this is an infectious disease and get the fear you might infect someone else. That’s a huge fear.”

    The fears keep coming:

    • Is it going to be debilitating?
    • Can you infect someone else?
    • Will you be able to work?
    • How are you going to pay for your treatment?
    • How are you going to take care of your family?
    • How are you going to pay the mortgage?

    “Once you learn more, you find out that hep C doesn’t work like that,” says Porter, who works as a hepatitis C advocate, writing for hepmag.com and hcvadvocate.org. “If you find out about it in an early stage and get some good, solid information, you find out that those fears don’t usually get realized.”

    Remember: In many cases, the medicines that your doctor prescribes can pretty much wipe the virus out of your body.

    “There is nothing to be afraid of. No matter how you got the infection, now we have a group of different, good therapies that can get rid of this infection,” says Victor Machicao, MD, a gastroenterologist with McGovern Medical School at UTHealth-Houston.

    “I usually tell [people] there’s a good chance that, you start taking the treatments, you’re going to start feeling better, and by the time that we complete the therapy, you’re going to feel almost like a new person.”

    Embarrassment and shame: Hepatitis C gets spread through exposure to an infected person’s blood. That’s the only way. Often, that’s how intravenous drug users, sharing needles, spread the virus. Sometimes, it gets passed down through high-risk sex. Before 1992, when blood wasn’t screened for hepatitis C in the U.S., it often was passed along through transfusions and organ transplants, too.

    Some of those activities — drug use and high-risk sex, especially — are what many people associate with hepatitis C. That thinking creates a stigma that makes people who have the disease not want to tell others about it.

    “So many of [the people I treat] are those baby boomers who did have a brief period of experimentation with drug use. Or maybe they did use drugs for a year or two of their adolescence. But now, that’s like 30 years ago,” says Andrew Muir, MD, a hepatologist who is chief of the Division of Gastroenterology at Duke Clinical Research Institute in Durham, NC.

    “Often, they’re not married to somebody that they knew back then … it’s embarrassing, then you’re worried about what that person is going to think of you, and then when you realize that there may be a chance that you’ve passed on the virus through sex. … All these things are spiraling around in their heads.”

    Guilt: “There’s a lot of guilt, especially in someone who has a remote history of IV drug use, or got a tattoo at an unregulated parlor, or had a high-risk sexual encounter,” says Nancy Reau, MD, section chief of hepatology at Rush University Medical Center in Chicago.

    People feel guilty about the possibility that they’ve infected others unknowingly. They feel guilty about putting loved ones in a situation that is often financially and emotionally costly. Sometimes, it can be too much for a person to handle.

    Regret: People with the disease often beat themselves up for not making better choices when they contracted the virus.

    “At that point, I tell every single one of my [folks] that there’s not a single one of us that wouldn’t go back and change a decision that we’ve made,” Reau says. “To some extent, looking back isn’t going to help us. We have to look forward.”

    Anger: “Anger is not an uncommon one. Anger is one of those emotions that make us feel like we’re empowered,” says Porter, who got hepatitis C in 1988 through a blood transfusion.

    For some, it comes from the fact that they had nothing to do with what gave them the virus.

    “I didn’t react with anger because in my case, that blood transfusion saved my life. But other people … can feel quite angry, and they feel quite victimized by that. I find [this] one is probably the hardest to address. Sometimes I just acknowledge that they feel angry.”

    Depression: The virus, the symptoms that may accompany it, all the emotions — it can be difficult to handle.

    Muir says a common scenario, in his experience, is a drug user who addresses the problem of addiction, goes in for treatment, and just as things start looking better, finds out they have hepatitis C.

    “I find a lot of them are really down on themselves: ‘I’m a bad person, I did this, I’m being punished for it.’ We really need to try to change the way they feel about that,” Muir says.

    “I was a mess. I felt dirty. I was hard on myself,” says Stella Armstrong, a Las Vegas office manager who got the virus through drug use. Armstrong is now virus-free and is a hepatitis C advocate and member of the National Patient Advisory Committee for the American Liver Foundation. “I had to seek counseling. I had to see a psychiatrist. I was taking depression and anxiety medicine.”

    How to Get Help

    Talk to your medical team. Meet with your doctor and anyone else you might need (a hepatologist or pharmacist, for example). Get a plan. Follow treatment.

    “You start there. Always,” Porter says.

    Don’t underestimate the power of feeling physically better. It’s good for your mind, too.

    Once again, the virus can disappear in many of those who have hepatitis C.

    “People are surprised. They ask you, ‘Doctor, did you mean ‘cure’?” Machicao says. “They come to the office and say, ‘Doctor, that means I don’t have the infection anymore?’ I tell them, ‘For practical purposes, you’re cured.’ They are in total disbelief. It is amazing.”

    “The success of being cured of hepatitis C is really powerful,” says Muir.

    If you feel depression or anxiety, the National Institute of Mental Health suggests that you talk to your primary doctor or go to a psychologist or psychiatrist. Depression is a real illness and, even in the most severe cases, it’s treatable with medication or other means.

    Get educated. Find trusted sites online. Ask your doctor questions. Know what the virus is all about. Separate fact from fiction.

    “Education is how we start breaking down the stereotypes. How we find out we don’t need to be afraid anymore,” Porter says. “It can release the chains of anger.”

    Find some support. It can help to talk with other people who have been through what you have. Your doctor can point you toward online groups filled with people who are going through the same process. In some places, you can meet with people in person. Social services through government agencies or hospitals can help, too.

    “When you start to see other people who have a history of drug use, that regret and shame starts to diminish. ‘OK. I’m not a bad person. I can deal with this,’ ” Porter says.

    “I’ve always been open and have discussed my addiction with drugs. I think it’s the best thing. We only stay as sick as our secrets,” Armstrong says. “It was better for me to share my story. It’s still the same thing. It’s still hepatitis C, and we have to get through it.”

    Lean on family, friends, clergy, whomever it takes. Whether it’s someone else who has been through hepatitis C, or a spouse, a parent, a sibling, or your best friend — even if it’s a complete stranger — sometimes you just need a shoulder or a sympathetic ear. Search them out. Use them.

    “No matter how much positive you can hear about it, you still have to go home, you still have to be at a point by yourself, thinking these bad thoughts and you’re worried and you’re scared and you’re scared of the unknown,” Armstrong says. “Those are the times you have to call somebody and talk to them.”

    Take care of yourself. Once you get your medical plan in place, once you have your support in line, once you’re educated and know what you’re facing, taking a little “me” time is in order.

    “Having a chronic illness is hard,” Reau says. “Start by looking at the things you can change easily.”

    Eat well. Exercise. Get your sleep. Some people like to meditate. Nap if you need to nap. Make sure you’re around people you like. Enjoy a good book or a movie. All these can help you deal with the stress and emotions of hepatitis C.

    “Even at my lowest point and when I was feeling really sick, you just gotta keep moving. You have no other choice,” Armstrong says. “You have to keep moving forward and treating yourself well.”

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  • How Healthy Is Horror?

    How Healthy Is Horror?

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    It may help with a person’s ability to cope with real-life stressful situations.

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