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Listening to Your Heart vs. Your Mind
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Love after 50: Navigating the Heart and Mind Connection
You can read the blog below or watch it on YouTube by clicking here.
My friend Suzanne experienced a profound heartache in her 40s that few can truly understand—she endured the devastating loss of her soulmate.
In those dark moments, she shared with me how it felt as though her heart had shattered into a million pieces.
It was a crushing blow that turned her whole world upside down.
The wound was so deep that it took her almost 10 years before she was willing to dip her toe into the dating pool.
She eventually did and ended up meeting a very wealthy businessman.
I can remember her being so drawn to his mind and intelligence.
Well, they ended up marrying; had a beautiful wedding, white dress and all and lived a lifestyle many would envy.
They traveled first class around the world.
They dined at the finest restaurants.
They bought a gorgeous old home and a lot of money renovating it.
They had tickets to the symphony and the ballet and travelled all the time to see the latest Broadway plays appearing in New York.
About 5 years into their marriage, she decided to retire from her high power corporate job just as her husband decided to expand his business.
The money was flowing and on the outside, they looked like the perfect couple with the perfect life.
It wasn’t until after they divorced that Suzanne told me the truth about how lonely she felt being married to someone whose mistress was work.
She’d been missing an intimacy you can only get on a soul level when your hearts connect.
Notice I said connection comes from your heart not your mind – it was her ex’s mind that Suzanne was so attracted to from the get go.
Fast forward a few years later and Suzanne meets another wealthy businessman.
And guess what the first words out of her mouth were . . . if you guessed I loved his intelligence than you would be right.
When she used intelligence to decide if a man was right for her, she was sending up a red flag that kept her in the pattern of dating the wrong men who at the end of the day left her feeling lonely in a relationship.
I asked my Suzanne if I could share an observation with her both as her friend and as a dating coach.
She said, “of course!”
I told her that even though she was thrilled by this man’s intelligence, it was going to keep her from getting to that place of intimacy she had so craved in her 2nd marriage.
Then I asked her the MOST IMPORTANT question . . .
“Suzanne, Are you protecting your heart?”
Like many of my clients, she, was afraid of getting her heart crushed again.
She’d go on a date and instead of looking for the good qualities in a man, she’d quickly find his faults so she could protect her heart.
And she chose a quality she desired in a man that would keep her heart safe . . . an attraction to his intelligence; a quality that keeps someone at arms length and at a distance.
I gave her my Secret Attraction Formula, which I want to share with you too.
A man’s personality + His appearance = Attraction.
When I asked if she liked a man’s personality, the only thing she could say was the dating world is messy.
Yes it can be messy and scary because it makes you so vulnerable.
Men love your accomplishments, they love your intelligence but what they love most about you is your heart, your passions in life and your vulnerability.
When you’re able to trust a man, you are triggering his hero response that wants to always keep you safe, protected and happy.
Like my friend, many women block their hearts because they are afraid of getting hurt again.
But if you block your heart, you can’t get the closeness and deep connection you want with a man.
So here’s my question for you . . . Is YOUR HEART open to love?
If it is, great!
But if its not, here’s what you can do about it.
I’ve created a Free Love Gift from my heart to yours to help you start the process of opening your heart to the perfect man for you. Click here to access it now.
One more thing . . . If you’ve been waiting for a sign that its time to jumpstart your journey to love, consider this is it.
Let’s dive into the heart of your dating life and unlock the patterns and possibilities that await.
It’s just a click away — share a bit about your dating adventures here and let’s schedule a session to map out your next chapter.
Your love story is waiting to happen, so let’s start crafting it together.
Believing in You!
Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .
💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.
If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:
1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.
2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, “The Winning Dating Formula.” It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.
3. Join our Finding Love after 50 Facebook group to find camaraderie and connection. It is a warm and welcoming space to share your journey and receive support every step of the way. Click here to become part of our community.
4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.
Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹
Love this article? Sign up by clicking here to receive my weekly blog.
Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.
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10 Strategies Used to Find Lasting Love
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10 Winning Strategies Women Over 50 Used to Find Lasting Love
You can read the blog below or watch it on YouTube by clicking here.
So many women over 50 find the search for the right partner to be challenging and exhausting.
That’s because most women think its their profile on the right dating site that gets them the guy.
Over the years of doing this work, I’ve found that the women who approached dating with a positive mindset and lots of enthusiasm are the one’s who ended up meeting high quality men they now share their lives with.
I’ve also noticed these women share 10 distinct traits that you probably have too – that helped them get their guy and I’m eager to share these with you today.
Trait #1 . . . Confidence and Independence
Women over 50 who intrigue a potential partner share 2 common traits: they radiate confidence and lead vibrant lives. (BTW. . . Men have often told me that confidence is the #1 trait they appreciate and desire in a woman)
Think about the passion you feel about the things you love doing in your life.
This is what lights you up and makes you more interesting which amplifies your attractiveness to men.
Balance is important in a relationship.
You want to make room for a partner while keeping your own passions alive.
In relationships, as women, we often give up our own activities in favor of what a man wants to do.
This dims your inner glow – the very thing that attracted a man to you in the first place.
Keep engaging in the activities you love and feel passionate about.
This is a huge part of what a man loves and cherishes about you.
Trait #2 Embracing Your Femininity
Men love your softer side which is your true feminine power.
Men know you are strong and can do anything you put your mind to.
They want to make your life easier and often we push them away and say we can do it ourselves.
The reason we do this is because we think if we let them do the lifting for us, it makes us look weak. It doesn’t!
When you allow yourself to receive, men will step up to make your life better and easier for you.
Trait #3 Communicating Effectively with Men
Men have told me they have a hard time following stories that women share about other people and things they know nothing about.
An example of this is when you share a story about your friends husbands cousin who is seeing a man that lives two cities north of her and she really likes the guy but doesn’t know how to get a second date.
This is the kind of story you want to share with a friend.
If you’re sharing it with a man, chances are his eyes are glazing over with overwhelming details he can’t follow.
That being said, they do want to hear stories that affect you directly.
Trait #4 Letting Men Be Men
Men really do want to make your life easier but when its not up to our expectation of how it should be done, we criticize or second guess them.
By doing this, he feel less than in your eyes – something no man wants to feel and he will stop doing for you because he feels whatever he does will never be enough.
Trait #5 Crafting an Engaging Online Profile
My clients who found their guy online had AWESOME profiles that captured the essence of who they are that attracted the right kind of attention from the men they wanted to meet.
(If you want to know how they did it, it’s all here in the Creating Your Irresistible Program.)
Trait #6 Looking Beyond First Impressions
Online dating is one-dimensional, meaning its so easy to make snap judgements about men based on their looks.
If you were at a party, you’d get to see how a mans personality and his looks blend which can make him a lot more attractive than just seeing his picture online.
Be careful of knocking out average guys who might make great partners.
If a guy reaches out to you and seems nice, give him a chance.
Trait # 7 Enjoying Dates as Opportunities
Women who have success at finding love with a good man go on a date with the mindset of getting to know someone new and interesting.
They don’t do dating resume interviews and they don’t check off imaginary must-have checklists that knock guys out faster than you can drink a cup of coffee.
Not all men will be a romantic interest.
There are good guys out there who could be your friend too.
Trait #8 Exploring Outside Your Comfort Zone
Women who date men that aren’t their usual type find there are far more good men out there to date than they ever imagined.
It’s easy to get in a rut, dating the same guy just with different clothes, hair and shoes over and over again.
You’re attracted to him not because he’s good for you but because he feels safe and comfy, like that old pair of shoes you can’t seem to throw away that no longer fit.
What we looked for in our 20’s is totally different than what we might want in a man today and it takes getting clarity on what this means to you.
My clients craft a personalized “Quality Man Template” to help them recognize why their past preferences in partners may no longer serve them.
This reflective exercise leads them to redefine their criteria for a partner, often resulting in discovering wonderful men whom they might have overlooked before.
Trait #9 Persevering in Dating
A BIG mistake women make is giving up on dating after 5 dates with 5 not so great guys.
To be successful at dating over 50, you have to keep at it.
Keep getting out there meeting those new and interesting men we talked about in #7.
Try new dating sites and apps or start talking to men you meet in real life.
Trait #10 Seeking Help When Needed
The women who had the most fun dating and meeting Mr. Right got help.
They recognized they couldn’t do it all alone.(some had tried for anywhere from 3-20 years before getting help)
What made the difference is they took action to get the advice and support they needed, worked with me 1 on 1 or in my Group Program then used what they learned from our time together to meet the right man for them.
As Sheryl discovered, one strategic move can be the key to unlocking new romantic possibilities.
Lisa joining your Love after 50 Group was one of the best things I’ve ever done. I learned so much about men, myself, communicating with men and so much more. It’s made a huge difference and helped me have fun dating as a woman in her 60’s. (And yes, the profile we created together has been great for attracting new and interesting men) And I love how you share what to do and what to say to men. It’s all been a dating game changer for me. So grateful to you and your program. Seeing the women including my self finding interesting men to meet is a paradigm shift that is priceless! Thank you so much. P.S. Found my guy and we’re now living together. I am so HAPPY!
So today, I encourage you to take a proactive step towards finding your right match.
Each action is a step toward your own success story.
Believing in You!
Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .
💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.
If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:
1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.
2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, “The Winning Dating Formula.” It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.
3. Join our Finding Love after 50 Facebook group to find camaraderie and connection. It is a warm and welcoming space to share your journey and receive support every step of the way. Click here to become part of our community.
4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.
Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹
Love this article? Sign up by clicking here to receive my weekly blog.
Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.
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3 Effective Strategies for Finding Love after 50!
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3 Effective Strategies for Finding Love after 50!
You can read the blog below or watch it on YouTube by clicking here.
Last night I started working on a 1,000-piece puzzle with a gorgeous view of an Italian coastal community. (Stay with me, this does have to do with finding love in your 50’s, 60’s and 70’s)
I chose it for two reasons.
Being a Scorpio, I love anything that has to do with water. (If you’ve ever spoken to me on the phone about your dating life, you may have heard my little water fountain trickling away in the background.)
The second reason is that going to the coast of Italy is on my bucket list. (By the way, creating a bucket list, whether you are single or in a relationship, makes life far more fun and gives you something to always look forward to.)
Ok . . . back to the puzzle and what this has to do with finding love after 50.
I was so excited to get this puzzle started.
I grabbed my favorite cup of Matcha Latte and began looking for the puzzle edges.
This turned out to be a lot harder than I originally thought it would be.
In fact, after an half or so of getting no where, I started feeling frustrated and overwhelmed.
Doing the puzzle and getting nowhere stopped feeling like fun.
That’s when an AHA moment happened.
I realized I needed a plan that would make putting this puzzle together enjoyable and would keep the level of frustration and overwhelm down.
Dating like a puzzle can become overwhelming and frustrating.
Starting out, you’re really excited, as you look at some of the more interesting men online.
You share emails with a couple of them and even meet a few.
But you quickly get frustrated because the men you want to meet aren’t contacting you.
Or the men you do meet aren’t who they say they are. Right?
After this happens a couple of times, you want to quit and give up on your dream of finding love after 50.
This happened to me too.
What kept me going was a 3-step plan I created that motivated me to move forward whenever frustration and overwhelm threatened to take over.
I know it can work for you too.
Step #1…Take a break
When you’re feeling either overwhelmed or frustrated, hide your profile and focus on you.
Nurture yourself.
Hang out with those male friends you’ve made along the way.
It’s nice being around male energy especially when there’s no pressure other than having fun.
Enjoy yourself and don’t go back online until you’ve recharged.
You’ll know when you’re ready.
Step #2…. When you’re ready to go back online, try a new dating site
When you’re seeing the same faces over and over again, its time to try a new dating site.
When joining a new site, sign up for the least amount of time you can.
Simply put, if the site doesn’t have enough paid members who can contact you, you’re going to want to move on.
When your subscription ends, paid sites will try and lure you back by offering you a great deal at a huge discount.
Good men are on both free and paid sites.
Try them both and while you’re at it, here are some of my favorites for you to check out… Lisa’s Favorite Dating Sites.
Step #3…. Make a list of 26 places where you can meet single men
Men are everywhere, yet most women don’t know where to look for them.
So here’s a tip for how you can find 26 places to potentially meet your guy.
Make a list from A-Z, then write down a local spot that starts with each letter.
Next, commit to visiting at least one of these places weekly.
Have a strategy in place for flirting and speaking to men everywhere you go.
Here’s why…
Lisa taught me how to flirt, something I’d forgotten or maybe never knew how to do. I’m telling you, LADIES, the strategies she suggested really WORK! I now feel confident and safe having casual conversations with men whenever I am. – Yaz, Kansas
And that’s what dating over 50 in the real world and online is all about.
It’s your turn now.
Put this 3-step plan in place and watch how taking breaks gets you excited again about dating.
Next, try a new dating site.
Create your list and make sure you’re going to one of the 26 places you discovered in your local area to flirt and meet new men every week.
Your new 3 step plan is going to give you exposure to more men and the more men you meet, the closer you are to finding the right one for you.
Big hugs ~
Love this article? Sign up by clicking here to receive my weekly blog.
Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.
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