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Tag: Dan Crenshaw

  • Republicans Explain Why They Support An Election Denier As House Speaker

    Republicans Explain Why They Support An Election Denier As House Speaker

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    Newly elected House Speaker Mike Johnson of Louisiana was a vocal supporter of Donald Trump’s efforts to overturn the 2020 presidential election. The Onion asked House Republicans why they unanimously selected an election denier as their leader, and this is what they said.

    Rep. ​Ron Estes (R-KS)

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    “Our two-party system of government works best when one party accepts election results and the other doesn’t.”

    Rep. George Santos (R-NY)

    Rep. George Santos (R-NY)

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    “Lord knows I’ve been asking my colleagues to overlook some shit.”

    Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA)

    Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA)

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    “Why would I abandon the strategy that got me this far?”

    Rep. Dan Crenshaw (R-TX)

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    “As the representative of a grossly gerrymandered district, I kind of forgot elections were a thing.”

    Rep. Chip Roy (R-TX)

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    “It seems like he never recovered from his parents’ divorce, so I thought the speakership might cheer him up.”

    Rep. Mike Johnson (R-LA)

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    “That’s not fair. A lot of my colleagues voted for me because of how much I hate gays.”

    Rep. Elise Stefanik (R-NY)

    Rep. Elise Stefanik (R-NY)

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    “If America didn’t want us empowering election deniers they would have voted the right way and not forced our hand.”

    Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA)

    Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA)

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    “Because I’m going to be raking in seven figures lobbying for Wal-Mart by next year so who gives a fuck.”

    Rep. Paul Gosar (R-AZ)

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    “Anything’s better than that cuck Paul Gosar taking charge.”

    Rep. Jim Jordan (R-OH)

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    “He said I could use the speaker’s office when he goes home for the night.”

    Rep. Greg Pence (R-IN)

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    “He had the little ‘R’ next to his name.”

    Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO)

    Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO)

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    “How are we supposed to deny the results of the next election if we don’t have a speaker?”

    Rep. Steve Scalise (R-LA)

    Rep. Steve Scalise (R-LA)

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    “My entire existence is centered around not making Donald Trump mad.”

    Rep. Nancy Mace (R-SC)

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    “We need to make Mr. Trump feel good. I mean, look at him: He’s mad all the time. Like, all the time! Don’t you just want to do something nice for a big ol’ grinch like that?”

    Rep. Patrick McHenry (R-NC)

    Rep. Patrick McHenry (R-NC)

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    “The beautiful thing about elections is that they’re subjective, like a work of art. They’re not determined by who had the most votes, but by which candidate spoke most eloquently to your heart.”

    Rep. Barry Loudermilk (R-GA)

    Rep. Barry Loudermilk (R-GA)

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    “At the end of the day, we all just want what’s best for our wealthiest constituents.”

    Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL)

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    “Because we’re laying groundwork to steal the next election. Was that not clear?”

    You’ve Made It This Far…

    You’ve Made It This Far…

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  • Jim Jordan-Backing Republican Receives A Blunt Reminder… But To No Avail

    Jim Jordan-Backing Republican Receives A Blunt Reminder… But To No Avail

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    Crenshaw talked up Jordan’s candidacy to replace ousted Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.) as the House remains speaker-less and at a standstill.

    Jordan’s reputation “has changed over time,” claimed Crenshaw, who argued the key Trump ally has “become part of the solution, not part of the problem.”

    Tapper reminded Crenshaw that Jordan “defied a congressional subpoena and he was trying to get (then-Vice President Mike) Pence to overturn the electoral votes but anyway, you’re in the Jordan camp.”

    “But a lot of them did that,” responded Crenshaw. “If I held that grudge, I wouldn’t have friends in the Republican Conference, because a lot of them did that.”

    Crenshaw made “an excellent point,” acknowledged Tapper, noting how two-thirds of the GOP conference opposed certifying the result.

    Crenshaw was not among those 139 House Republicans, though.

    “I was always on an island there,” Crenshaw told Tapper.

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  • GOP Lawmaker Finds Way To Blame Lost Submersible On ‘Epic Failure Of Leadership’

    GOP Lawmaker Finds Way To Blame Lost Submersible On ‘Epic Failure Of Leadership’

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    Rep. Dan Crenshaw (R-Texas) laid blame Thursday on the U.S. Coast Guard after the armed forces branch said it had found pieces of the lost Titan submersible on the ocean floor. Things might have turned out differently, he said, if leadership “had just acted sooner.”

    Crenshaw made the comments shortly after the Coast Guard said Thursday that a remotely operated vehicle (ROV) discovered a debris field “consistent with the catastrophic loss of its pressure chamber.” The Wall Street Journal later reported that the Navy had registered sounds consistent with an explosion or implosion shortly after contact with the Titan was lost Sunday, but a Navy official later said it would have been “irresponsible” to assume then that the Titan passengers and pilot had died.

    But the Republican lawmaker claimed the international search effort appeared to be a case of “epic failure in leadership,” possibly stretching into the White House and upper echelons of the Coast Guard and Navy.

    “I have been hearing a lot of concerning things from people, the civilian side who are involved in this,” Crenshaw said Thursday in a statement to reporters. “You know, we’ve got to look into it, see what’s true and what isn’t. … What appears to be the case is epic failure in leadership. Where exactly that leadership failure is, I don’t know. Is it the White House, Coast Guard, Navy? I’m not sure.”

    The discovery ended an international race against the clock in hopes of recovering the lost vessel before its oxygen supply ran out. The Titan lost contact with its parent ship on Sunday, about two hours after its launch with five men on board to visit the wreckage of the Titanic, about 2½ miles deep on the floor of the Northern Atlantic.

    Crenshaw told Fox News later Thursday that he was concerned with the timeline of the rescue effort, particularly amid reports of a tapping noise picked up by search-and-rescue crews. The congressman said a Magellan submarine and specialized remote-operated vehicle should have been deployed to the region immediately to help find the vessel more quickly.

    “Now, it’s important to note, that if you had just deployed those assets, they would have arrived on scene by Wednesday morning at the latest,” he said. “They finally deploy that ROV, the only thing capable of actually going to that depth and seeing what’s down there, this morning. It deploys down there and the wreckage was exactly where they thought it would be.”

    “So where’s the failure here? The failure is to not put all your options on the table,” he added.

    Crenshaw went on to question if the Coast Guard had been operating on the assumption from the Navy that the vessel had imploded rather than it purely being a rescue.

    “It begs the question: Could this have been resolved differently if leadership had just acted sooner and actually put options on the table instead of just assuming, well, it doesn’t matter because they’re dead?” he said.

    OceanGate Expeditions, the company that owned the Titan, released a statement Thursday calling those on board, including the company’s chief executive, “true explorers who shared a distinct spirit of adventure.”

    “Our hearts are with these five souls and every member of their families during this tragic time,” the company said. OceanGate said Thursday it would not be issuing any other comments on the incident.

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