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Tag: counseling

  • Choosing a career? In a fast-changing job market, listen to your inner self – counselor

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    by Kobus Maree, University of Pretoria

    The world of work today, in the 21st century, is far more unpredictable than it was in the 20th century. Jobs come and go, roles change constantly, and automation and digital disruption are the only constants. Many young people will one day do jobs that don’t yet exist or did not exist a few years ago. Change is the new normal.

    In this world, career counselling focuses on navigating repeated transitions and developing resilience. It is about employability and designing meaningful work-lives – not about finding a single “job for life”. It recognises that economic activity is part of wider social realities.

    At its heart is the search for a sense of purpose.

    As a career counsellor and academic, I’ve been through decades of innovation, research, and practice in South Africa and beyond. I have found that the work of US counselling psychologist Mark Savickas offers a useful way to understand how people build successful and purpose-filled careers in changing times.

    His career construction theory says that rather than trying to “match” people to the “right” environment, counsellors should see their clients as authors of their own careers, constantly trying to create meaning, clarify their career-life themes, and adapt to an unpredictable world.

    In simple terms, this means in practice that career decisions are not just about skills or interests, but about how we make sense of our lives. They are about our values and how we adapt when the world shifts.

    In my own work I emphasise that career counselling should draw on people’s “stories” (how they understand themselves) as well as their “scores” (information about them). This is why I developed instruments that blend qualitative and quantitative approaches to exploring a person’s interests.

    I also think career counselling should be grounded in context – the world each person lives in. For example, in South Africa, young people face multiple career-life transitions, limited opportunities and systemic constraints, such as uneven and restricted access to quality education and schooling, lack of employment opportunities, and insufficient career counselling support. My work in this South African context emphasises (personal) agency, (career) adaptability, purpose, and hope.

    This goes beyond “what job suits you best”, into a richer, narrative-based process. Clients recount their career-life story, identify “crossroads”, reflect on their values and purpose, and design their next career-life chapters. Essentially, this approach helps them listen to themselves – to their memories, dreams, prospects, values, and emerging self- and career identities – and construct a story that really matters to the self and others.

    I also believe that career counsellors should try to help people deal with their disappointments, sadness and pain, and empower them to heal others and themselves.

    Tips for career builders

    Adaptability is a central theme in current career theory. It has four dimensions:

    • concern (about the future)
    • control (over your destiny)
    • curiosity (exploring possibilities)
    • confidence (in your capacity to act).

    When you develop these capacities, you are better equipped to manage career-life transitions, redesign your career appropriately and promptly, and achieve a meaningful work-life balance.

    I have found that in practice it’s helpful to:

    • reflect on key “turning points” in your career-life and earliest memories
    • integrate self-understanding with awareness of what’s happening in an industry, technology and the economy
    • draw on “stories” (subjective information about yourself) and “scores” (objective data)
    • develop a sense of mission (what the job means for you personally) and vision (your contribution to society, not just your job title).

    I invite you to reflect deeply on your story, identify the key moments that shaped you, clarify your values, and decide what contribution you want to make. Then (re-)design your way forward, step by step, one transition at a time.

    If it’s possible, a gap year can be a good time to do this reflection, learn new skills and develop qualities in yourself, like adaptability.

    One of the best pieces of advice for school leavers I’ve ever seen was this: “Get yourself a passport and travel the world.”

    How a counselor can help

    One of the key tenets of my work is the belief that career counseling should be beneficial not only to individuals but also to groups of people. It should promote the ideals of social justice, decent work, and the meaningful contribution of all people to society.

    For me, the role of practitioners is not to advise others but to enable them to listen to their inner selves.

    To put it another way: in a world of uncertainty, purpose becomes a compass; a North Star. It gives direction. By helping you find the threads that hold your life together and your unique career story, a counsellor helps you take control of your career-life in changing contexts.

    There’s also a shift of emphasis in career counseling towards promoting the sustainability of societies and environments on which all livelihoods are dependent.

    Career counseling is more vital than ever – not a luxury. It’s not about providing answers but about helping people become adaptive, reflective, resilient and hopeful.

    Kobus Maree, Professor of Educational Psychology, University of Pretoria

    This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.

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  • The Will to Improve: Bridging the Gap Between “Talk” and “Action”

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    Do you have trouble transforming talk → action? Learn about Personal Growth Initiative (PGI) and the essential components behind a lifelong mindset of self-improvement.

    Personal growth doesn’t just happen — it requires intention, planning, and action. While many of us may talk a lot about the things we want to change in our lives, transforming that talk into action can be a real challenge.

    Psychologists have identified Personal Growth Initiative as a mindset that bridges this all-too-common gap between “talk” and “action,” helping individuals actively and consciously pursue their development in a clear and deliberate way.

    As a reader of this article, you likely already check off some boxes for Personal Growth Initiative. The average person doesn’t consciously seek out knowledge about psychology and self-improvement, so you’re in a unique and special group of people. By virtue of being here right now, you are demonstrating a rare initiative. 

    Now let’s dive more into what PGI is all about.

    Personal Growth Initiative: The 4 Core Components

    Personal Growth Initiative (PGI) is a set of beliefs and attitudes that help individuals intentionally engage in their own growth process. It consists of four main components.

    Readiness for Change

    The first step is to be ready to make a change. A person can have all the help, guidance, and resources in the world at their disposal, but it all amounts to nothing if they aren’t ready to make that final leap. The basic truth is we often need that proverbial “fire under our butts” before we take conscious action. Once you’re ready, the next step is to translate that readiness into a clear plan of action.

    Thought Patterns:

    • “I am aware of when I need to make a change.”
    • “I take every opportunity to grow as it comes up.”
    • “I am willing to step out of my comfort zone to achieve growth.”
    • “I take an active role in my self-improvement.”
    • “I don’t sit and wait for change to happen.”

    Example: Imagine facing burnout at work. Instead of feeling trapped, a person with a high readiness for change may recognize this as a signal to re-evaluate their work habits or career path, making room for new habits and healthier routines (such as sleep, diet, exercise, or leisure time).

    Worksheet: Self-Improvement Contract (PDF)

    Making a Plan

    The second step is to create realistic plans for your growth. An idea remains just that until you put it on paper and hold yourself accountable. Having a clear vision of your future and where you want to go, then setting small and realistic goals that are within your reach, can help propel you forward in a natural and sustainable way. 

    Thought Patterns:

    • “I set realistic goals for what I want to change about myself.”
    • “I have a specific action plan to help me reach my goals.”
    • “I break down larger goals into smaller, manageable tasks.”
    • “I regularly review my progress and adjust my plan accordingly.”
    • “I stay committed to my plan even when faced with setbacks.”

    Example: Let’s say you want to improve your physical health or lose weight. Instead of jumping into an unsustainable workout routine, a planful person might research the best exercise programs, consult with a trainer, and create a structured plan that best fits their lifestyle, personality, and fitness goals.

    Worksheets: Goals Timeline (PDF) + New Habit Worksheet (PDF)

    Using Resources

    Another essential feature of the Personal Growth Initiative is actively seeking help and guidance from outside resources, including learning materials like articles and books, as well as reaching out to friends, mentors, or counselors. This is one of the most common ways people handicap themselves because they wrongly believe “I have to do everything on my own,” when the truth is there are plenty of resources available to take advantage of (including this website).

    Thought Patterns:

    • “I ask for help from others when I need it.”
    • “I do my own research to learn more about new topics.”
    • “I like reading articles and books to learn new things.”
    • “I’m not afraid to reach out to a therapist or coach if I really need one.”
    • “I connect with communities or groups that align with my values and goals.”

    Example: During a stressful life transition, like a divorce or job loss, someone with strong PGI would actively seek out the right books and resources, such as counseling or career coaching, to navigate the situation more smoothly and effectively.

    Worksheets: Social Support Database (PDF) + Role Models (PDF)

    Intentional Behavior

    Intentional Behavior refers to the daily or weekly actions you take that are purposefully directed toward achieving your goals. Unlike Readiness for Change, which is about being mentally prepared and open to growth, Intentional Behavior is about translating that readiness into consistent, goal-directed actions. It’s the final step between “talk” and “action.” For example, Readiness for Change might mean deciding that improving your health is necessary, while Intentional Behavior is actually getting up every morning to go for a jog or preparing a healthy meal. 

    Thought Patterns:

    • “I turn my intentions into actions.”
    • “I take small steps forward every day.”
    • “I build new habits into my daily routine that bring me closer to my goals.”
    • “I know what steps I can take to make intentional changes in myself.”

    Example: After recognizing the need for change and making a plan, intentional behavior would involve committing to daily or weekly actions—whether it’s setting aside time for self-care or networking to explore new career opportunities. Each small step compounds over time, leading to greater progress and resilience.

    Worksheets: Daily Routine (PDF) + Future Self Worksheet (PDF)

    The Long-Term Benefits of PGI on Well-Being

    Each of these components supports and strengthens the next, creating a clear pathway from “ideas” to “actions.”

    “Readiness for Change” sets the foundation by keeping you open to new paths and patterns in life, ensuring that you are mentally prepared for growth and change when needed. From there, “Making a Plan” gives direction and a direct course for action, “Using Resources” provides support, knowledge, and inspirational boosts, and “Intentional Behavior” turns plans into consistent daily and weekly action. Together, they create a feedback loop that encourages continuous growth and resilience.

    For example, someone with high Readiness for Change will see a major setback, like losing a job, as an opportunity to learn new skills or change their career path. They use Planfulness to plot a course of action they can follow, like going back to school or learning a new trade, seek new resources like career counseling, job fairs, or apprenticeships, and take consistent daily action, such as taking classes, practicing new skills, or sending out resumes – all of which help them not only cope with this major life change, but also thrive and ultimately find a better path forward in the long run.

    One study published in the Journal of Happiness Studies found that PGI is positively related to adaptive coping styles and self-efficacy, suggesting that those who actively engage in personal growth are better equipped to handle negative and stressful events more effectively, because they approach life’s obstacles with the mindset of growth and learning rather than resignation and defeat.

    If you aren’t ready to make a change – or you are completely resistant to change – it’s unlikely to happen. This includes therapy and coaching, where studies show that “motivational readiness” can be a contributing factor to how effective a therapeutic intervention is. This aligns with common factors theory, where one of the most important features of successful therapy and counseling is “shared goals” among therapist and client – you have to be on the same page about where you are and where you want to go.

    Overall, PGI fosters a mindset that not only supports mental health and well-being but also builds long-term grit and resilience. By approaching challenges with intentional growth, individuals are more prepared to navigate life’s obstacles, setbacks, and inevitable ups and downs.

    Embrace the Will to Improve

    The best way to prove your commitment to something is through your actions.

    Ask yourself, “What is the smallest step I can take today to start moving in the right direction?” Maybe it’s joining a gym, starting a new hobby, setting a 10-minute daily reading habit, or subscribing to our newsletter for more actionable tips and advice on self-improvement.

    Personal Growth Initiative is about more than just wanting to improve — it’s about intentionally working toward becoming a better version of yourself. Start today by taking one small step, however small it may be.


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    Steven Handel

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  • How I Integrate Gottman Method Therapy and Susan Johnson’s Emotionally Focused Therapy in My Work With Couples

    How I Integrate Gottman Method Therapy and Susan Johnson’s Emotionally Focused Therapy in My Work With Couples

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    In the 1970’s and 1980’s, two pioneers in marital research were quietly gathering data on how to create happy lasting relationships. Dr. John Gottman’s and Dr. Susan Johnson’s research was initially known mostly among academic circles because therapists  were still afraid of doing couples therapy. Gottman’s and Johnson’s research brought an unprecedented empirical foundation to what was often considered chaotic, unpredictable, and thankless couples therapy work. Today, Gottman and Johnson have reached world renown and are considered two of the most influential figures in couples therapy, not just for academics but therapists as well as the general public. 

    Difference in therapy approaches

    The philosophical and technical differences between their approaches to relationship research and therapy have generated separate and passionate followers. Both researchers have developed unique models of successful adult love relationships, but from different points of view and different sets of data. Gottman gave us a science of healthy relationships from systematic longitudinal and observational research on couples not in therapy. He focused on both couples in distress (the Disasters of Relationships) as well as couples in lasting, satisfying relationships (the Masters of Relationships).

    Susan Johnson, on the other hand, built her foundation of loving relationships on the theoretical framework of John Bowlby as well as thousands of hours of decoding and tracking couples therapy sessions. So Johnson’s model is an empirical model of couples therapy. Unfortunately the field of couples therapy is split into many different approaches, each vying for the highest status as the only model that works or the one model shown to have the best efficacy.  At the ground level where therapists are working with couples is distress, I argue that using just one model is limiting and potentially not helping couples.  Couples in distress want a therapist who understands their dilemmas and patterns accurately, has a roadmap to recovery, and is skilled at implementing the techniques.  

    I propose that therapists working with couples should thoughtfully consider which model is best suited for which couples and when to bring in techniques from one approach or another to help a couple make progress on their stuck issues.  In this article, I describe my approach to integrating the Gottman method with Sue Johnson’s EFT.

    Gottman Method

    The Gottman method is the brainchild of both of Drs. John and Julie Gottman, John’s wife and co-creator of the Gottman Method.  The Gottmans bring a relationship skill building and existential lens while Sue Johnson is firmly grounded in Adult Attachment Theory. There are also differences in their view of couples therapy and the role of the therapist. The Gottmans warn against therapists becoming indispensable to the couple and encourage them to coach couples to manage their own physiology, conflict, or intimacy system. Johnson, on the other hand, uses the therapist as a “secure base” and encourages them to build a secure container in which the anxiously or avoidantly attached partner can take the risk of expressing vulnerable feelings and needs.

    There may be other differences, but the exciting frontier is not in their uniqueness or differences but their growing confluence of concepts and ideas and the desire of therapists to integrate both approaches in a seamless couples therapy that can benefit both clinicians and couples.

    Here is some of the common ground I see in Gottman and Johnson that allows me to flexibly shift from a relationship-building to an attachment-oriented therapist as the couple’s emotional system requires.

    Alternating between and combining the methods

    When a couple enters therapy with me, I begin with the Gottman Method. The Sound Relationship House is a simple, practical, and aspirational model that every couple can understand and adopt with little resistance. Who doesn’t want a relationship that has a wonderful friendship base, tackles gridlocked and perpetual conflict with ease and humor, and a shared meaning system that inspires the best in oneself?

    The structured process of the Gottman assessment is reassuring, straightforward, and transparent. Couples appreciate being able to tell the story of their relationship, being heard separately and together, and being able to fill out the surveys and conduct a private review of their relationship strengths and growth edges. The contracting process inspires hope as each strength is highlighted and celebrated and growth edges are reassuringly connected with specific skills they will learn within a reasonable period of time. Couples feel a sense of promise and relief as they walk away with their Sound Relationship House magnets and a map of the journey they are going to embark on with my guidance.

    And then the real work begins!

    Both Gottman and Johnson recognize the necessity of an emotional focus and the powerful influence of attachment histories, styles, and internal working models in adult intimate relationships. I might be helping the couple replace their four horsemen with the appropriate antidotes, but a part of me is also tracking their negative emotional cycle. Often time the absorbing nature of negative emotions (Gottman) and the unresolved hurts and wounds (Johnson) lead to predictable negative cycles and prevent the couple from having honest and vulnerable conversations.

    I might offer one partner the practical information about criticism and contempt as they struggle to understand how to express their frustration. Simultaneously I hear, validate, and explore the attachment needs and emotions of the other partner who is struggling with their internal reactions rooted in early childhood patterns that create both interpretations as well as action tendencies when confronted with conflict.  I have the relationship science and simple language of Gottman in my right hand and a more emotion-focused dynamic and process-oriented toolkit from Johnson in my left hand, and I weave both into the therapeutic process.

    Integrating approaches

    Similarly, I help couples process an argument with the Aftermath of a Regrettable Incident exercise and help them learn how to make their conflict discussions just a little bit better than the last time. At the same time, I look for the anatomy of the fight. Why was this particular argument more painful for the wife? Does her attachment history shed some light on her ability to let go of her anger? As they process the clearly laid out exercise and take the steps one at a time, the structure keeps the conversation safe and manageable. I use my skills as an attachment-oriented observer to help the withdrawn spouse re-engage, or I help the partner who is casting blame to soften their internal dialogue and reach out with tenderness.

    Sometimes the integration of Gottman and Johnson is more obvious as when I am working with bids and turning towards and helping a couple process failed bids. I know from both the Gottmans and Johnson that not all hurts are the same and that some emotional injuries can be traumatic when they trigger deeply held beliefs about the self, the other, and about intimate relationships.

    Gottman gives me the Sound Relationship House theory to help couples see the connection between the emotional bank account and how the friendship base downregulates negativity, increases positivity, intimacy, romance, and connection. Johnson gives me the tools to repair a depleted emotional bank account, to take couples gently through the process of first acknowledging and then healing attachment injuries, and restoring the bond that once existed.

    Final thoughts

    I do have to confess that the Gottman Method is my first love. The Gottmans paint the relationship landscape for me in a way that fits smoothly with the way I work. Johnson’s methods draw me into the turbulent waters of primary emotions that require more effort from me in order to stay afloat. I find that both are necessary. My hope is that the field of couples therapy embraces the technical flexibility afforded by integrative approaches as a new generation of couples bring us unique and challenging sources of pain that need to be addressed and resolved.  

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    Vagdevi Meunier

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  • Mike Johnson’s Wife Runs Counseling Service That Compares Being Gay To Bestiality, Incest

    Mike Johnson’s Wife Runs Counseling Service That Compares Being Gay To Bestiality, Incest

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    The wife of newly elected House Speaker Mike Johnson (R-La.) runs a counseling business that advocates the belief that homosexuality is comparable to bestiality and incest, according to its operating documents.

    Johnson and his wife, Kelly, have long intertwined their political and business lives: They became a known entity in the late 1990s when they went on national television as the face of Louisiana’s new marriage covenant law, which makes it harder to get a divorce. Today, they co-host a podcast, “Truth Be Told,” where they talk about political and social issues from a conservative Christian perspective. Their podcast is up to 69 episodes.

    “We have been working in ministry side by side and together for our whole marriage,” Johnson said last year when he and his wife launched their podcast, in an interview with The Message, a website that connects members of the Louisiana Southern Baptist community.

    The House speaker’s identity as an evangelical Christian has been a driving force in his personal life and his career, which includes eight years as the senior attorney and national spokesperson for a legal nonprofit affiliated with the religious right.

    “Go pick up a Bible off your shelf and read it ― that’s my worldview,” Johnson told Fox News’ Sean Hannity in a Thursday night interview. “That’s what I believe, and so I make no apologies for it.”

    Kelly Johnson features the couple’s podcast on the website of her company, Onward Christian Counseling Services, which promotes Bible-based pastoral counseling. Her website also includes a link to its 2017 operating agreement, which lays out the corporate bylaws for the company ― and embraces a number of socially conservative beliefs about LGBTQ+ people and women’s reproductive rights.

    The agreement states that Onward Christian Counseling Services is grounded in the belief that sex is offensive to God if it is not between a man and a woman married to each other. It puts being gay, bisexual or transgender in the same category as someone who has sex with animals or family members, calling all of these examples of “sexual immorality.”

    “We believe and the Bible teaches that any form of sexual immorality, such as adultery, fornication, homosexuality, bisexual conduct, bestiality, incest, pornography or any attempt to change one’s sex, or disagreement with one’s biological sex, is sinful and offensive to God,” says the eight-page business document.

    This agreement also refers to “pre-born babies” and says the company is committed to defending and protecting all human life, “from conception through natural death.”

    Speaker Johnson’s signature is on the last page. He notarized the document on July 1, 2017. Notaries are not required to read the documents they notarize and are sometimes discouraged from doing so for privacy reasons.

    Here’s a copy of the operating agreement.

    Comparing homosexuality to bestiality and incest was relatively common among Republicans in the early 2000s, when the party made battling same-sex marriage a central issue during President George W. Bush’s reelection bid in 2004. Then-Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Pa.) famously made the comparison in 2003, suggesting a Supreme Court case striking down state bans on sodomy would open the door to “man on child, man on dog, or whatever the case may be.”

    Those comments have become far less acceptable ― but remain just as offensive ― as marriage equality has risen in popularity. Seventy-one percent of adults believe same-sex marriage should be legal, according to Gallup. Santorum apologized for his comments in 2015, the same year the U.S. Supreme Court legalized gay marriage nationwide.

    Kelly Johnson’s document was drawn up two years after that.

    It’s not clear whether Speaker Johnson, who is a constitutional lawyer and has a long record of attacking LGBTQ+ and women’s rights in the courts, believes that homosexuality is akin to bestiality and incest, and that life begins at conception. More importantl it’s not clear whether the Louisiana Republican plans to use the power of the speakership to advocate for policy changes that reflect these kinds of ideologically extreme conservative Christian principles.

    In his Thursday interview with Hannity, Johnson said the Supreme Court “changed the definition of marriage that had been used by every human society for 5,000 years,” while also signaling he accepts the legal ruling.

    “When five justices changed it, that became the law of the land,” he said.

    A Johnson spokeswoman did not respond to a request for comment.

    “We have been working in ministry side by side and together for our whole marriage,” Speaker Mike Johnson (R-La.) says of his wife, with whom he co-hosts a podcast about political and social issues from a conservative Christian perspective.

    Chip Somodevilla via Getty Images

    It’s not a leap to suggest that Johnson, who is now second in line to the presidency, would try to connect his religious beliefs to his work on Capitol Hill.

    In one of their most recent podcast episodes, on Sept. 8, Johnson and his wife discuss “How to Stand for Religious Freedom & Address the ‘Separation of Church and State.’” That episode came after a speech Johnson gave on the House floor in April in which he decried the “so-called separation of church and state” and insisted the Constitution does not bar the government from supporting religious beliefs.

    “The Founders wanted to protect the church from an encroaching state, not the other way around,” Johnson said in his floor remarks.

    Caroline Ciccone, president of Accountable.US, a nonprofit that examines power and influence in Washington, said the fact that Johnson is now the House speaker means there will be “more attempts to force a far-right agenda on everyday Americans.”

    “The more we learn about Speaker Mike Johnson, the worse it gets,” Ciccone said. “His extensive far-right voting record and history of radical anti-LGBTQ and anti-abortion statements make him one of the most extreme members of the House MAGA majority.”

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  • We Need a Real Commitment to Mental Health at Work. Here’s How (and Why) | Entrepreneur

    We Need a Real Commitment to Mental Health at Work. Here’s How (and Why) | Entrepreneur

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    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    There’s quite a lot of dialogue about employees’ mental health taking place now in the corporate world — the importance of prioritizing wellbeing, making work a safe place to be and shifting the expectation away from dangerous stress and burnout.

    But how much is really changing?

    While workplace discourse may be shifting to acknowledge the importance of employee mental health, many are just paying lip service to it. What we don’t want – and what I sometimes fear – is that mental health awareness is becoming the latest trend without a real deep connection to how to support the workforce best. With a doctorate in psychology, more than 20 years of expertise as a psychologist, and 12 years as a coach and trainer, I am seeing firsthand little change in large organizations. Unfortunately, what continues is the negative impact on employees from working in environments where their mental wellbeing is not a priority.

    Yet it’s desperately needed. Seven in 10 people globally are struggling with mental health issues, and there’s a trillion dollars’ worth of lost productivity due to anxiety and depression in the global economy.

    In 2023, the Workforce Institute at UKG surveyed 3,400 people across 10 countries and found that two-thirds of employees would accept reduced pay for a job that better supports their mental health. They found that managers impact employees’ mental health (69%) more than doctors (51%) and spouses (69%). Even the 2022 Gallup State of the Global Workplace survey data found that 60% of people are emotionally detached at work – with 19% saying they’re “miserable” and 44% experiencing stress “a lot.” Interestingly, they found that employees who are “engaged but not thriving” have a 61% higher likelihood of ongoing burnout than those who are “engaged and thriving.”

    Supervisors micromanaging their employees’ workday is a crucial issue impacting employees’ mental health. Having someone sit at your shoulder all the time and not trusting you to execute your tasks causes increased stress and anxiety for people – yet in the U.S., a study in 2020 revealed 64% of employees felt micromanaged. As leaders, developing a trusting relationship with your employees is essential. Employees and their managers will never establish a culture of trust if micromanaging is taking place.

    Something needs to change.

    We already know that a mentally and emotionally healthy workforce is essential for a company’s success and long-term sustainability. Focusing on wellbeing fosters a positive work environment, improving productivity and reducing absenteeism. And when employees feel valued, they’re more likely to remain with the company longer. We know that high employee retention rates contribute to lower recruitment and training costs and a more experienced and cohesive team. It’s a no-brainer: we need a “people-first” culture.

    So, how do we make the workplace a safe place for people to get the support they need?

    Related: How to Spot Entrepreneurial Burnout (Before It’s Too Late)

    The importance of workplace culture

    Having a people-first workplace culture focused on flexibility, wellbeing and support is one that does not prioritize working their employees to exhaustion and burnout.

    Many companies say they’re committed to supporting mental health in the workplace, yet that’s not what they’re modeling. Instead, they’re modeling working 60 hours a week and seemingly expecting that if management adds ten items to your to-do list, you must prioritize every single one, immediately. Many employees won’t say no because they fear getting fired. There needs to be alignment between what companies say they will do and what they are actually doing.

    How can leaders and their organizations make meaningful change, and what does that look like?

    Related: How Entrepreneurs Can Protect Their Mental Health While Being Their Boss

    1. Ensure wellbeing is an integrated part of company culture

    Wellbeing and mental health are ongoing areas that must remain priorities. How do companies show employees they care? Mental health support should be part of an ongoing, ever-evolving commitment in the workplace that develops and adapts to the evolving needs of the employees.

    What policies do you have in place as a leadership team? How does the culture encourage wellbeing right now? What needs changing, what needs supporting and what needs to stop? Don’t think of wellbeing inclusion as a “quick fix.” Assess your current policies and discuss how they may need to be improved.

    Creating a Mental Health at Work Charter is one way to solidify your organization’s commitment. Tailor it to align with the business model, and it will serve as a roadmap to achieve better mental health outcomes for employees. Try starting with what you plan to do each year – and don’t forget to include time to reevaluate and gather feedback from employees on what they believe the company can do to support them.

    One option might be to communicate that mental health sick days are valid in your company. Taking a mental health day when things seem too much could mean an employee avoids burnout. Some companies in the U.S. offer once-a-month “self-care days” to their staff, which doesn’t come out of their vacation allowance, but gives employees an extra “free” day off to take time out for themselves.

    Another option may be assessing your flexible working policy. Since the pandemic began, companies now proudly display their “hybrid” policies on job advertisements — but requiring people to come into the office four days a week on specific days, with one day from home, isn’t true flexibility. What is your policy, and does it really support people’s needs?

    2. Seek to understand the needs of your employees

    Employees with diagnosed mental health or neurodivergent conditions often fear discrimination or bias or are concerned about stigma. To create a safe and inclusive environment, organizations should provide training and education on mental health and neurodiversity for managers and leaders, and ensure policies and practices are in place to prevent discrimination and bias. Managing a diverse workforce well involves learning about these differences and how they impact interpersonal relationships, communication, productivity and wellbeing.

    Support can come in many forms, but what is it that your workforce needs? This is best decided by speaking directly to your employees or doing a staff survey, to explore which parts of the culture are seen as conducive to mental wellbeing and what needs improving.

    Companies could also use mental health ambassadors to create focus groups around what they believe the company can or could do to improve its commitment. Once you have a working group, you could set up monthly workshops on different themes: belonging, inclusivity, mental health days and burnout. It’ll bring people together and gather honest feedback.

    3. Lead by example

    Modeling healthy behaviors is a crucial step in prioritizing mental wellbeing at work. Many employees may be told they don’t need to work late or answer emails on the weekend – but if they see their manager doing so, they take that as a hint that it’s the best way to be at work. It’s no good saying you support mental wellbeing and a healthy work-life balance if you don’t model it. But by doing so, your staff will feel it’s acceptable to prioritize self-care and set boundaries.

    Related: Entrepreneurship Is All About Overcoming Obstacles

    Don’t worry so much about improving your team’s mental health that you forget about your own. Let them know if you’re leaving early to get some much-needed downtime. Remind them that you go for a walk in the middle of the day to gain some clarity (plus exercise and fresh air), or let them know when you’re entirely switching off your emails and laptop in the evenings and for your vacation.

    4. Create a culture of connection

    An excellent way to commit to an ongoing conversation about mental health in the workplace is to build and nurture a culture of connection through check-ins. You may already have one-to-ones with your employees — but how are these usually structured? Perhaps an update on their weekly tasks, deadlines and ideas for the future?

    Consider making mental health a part of these meetings. A study between Mind Share Partners, SAP, and Qualtrics in 2020 found that 41% of employees wanted their manager to ask them about their mental health and wellbeing. Of course, your job isn’t to be their counselor, but you can listen, learn, and identify if additional support is needed.

    A simple “How are you really doing?” or “What concerns do you have about work or outside work?” Let them know they can come to you if they have any worries or stressors, and you can work together to address their concerns.

    Related: Why Your Mental Health Is the Key to Your Success in Business

    As always, an investment in mental health — like any investment into a company’s culture — takes time. But it also requires the whole company’s deep commitment and belief that it’s needed. By investing in the wellbeing of their workforce, businesses benefit in many ways, ensuring long-term success in an increasingly competitive market.

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    Dr. Samantha Madhosingh

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  • How Counseling Can Help Entrepreneurs Working With a Spouse | Entrepreneur

    How Counseling Can Help Entrepreneurs Working With a Spouse | Entrepreneur

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    Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.

    My husband and I have run businesses together since we were in law school. We sold our first business to Intuit in 2005. Still feeling the entrepreneurial bug, we built a second business we’re still running today. Together, we’ve raised four kids and a multimillion-dollar business — a success story, yes, but not without its challenges at home and in the office.

    While not everyone welcomes the idea of getting professional counseling, from my viewpoint — and personal experience — counseling can help in ways you didn’t think possible. For example, in a recent American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) study, almost 90% of marriage therapy clients reported an improvement in their emotional health, and most noted an improvement at work and in the couple’s relationship.

    Related: The Science Behind Working With Your Spouse

    Here are a few takeaways from my experience with professional counseling:

    Build strength: Counseling not only strengthened our marriage but also made our business relationship stronger by showing us how to communicate more effectively and focus on each other’s feelings rather than the facts. If you’re not sure you’re communicating enough, over-communicate just to be sure.

    Learn the owner’s manual: Just as you need an owner’s manual to operate a washing machine, you must learn your partner’s personal “owner’s manual” (i.e. what makes them tick, what makes them happy or sad, what causes frustration, etc.).

    Don’t assume you know your partner better than anyone else because you’re married or in a relationship. Instead, do some homework and have each partner create a personal user manual. Write an outline of how you like to work, share responsibilities, collaborate, communicate and receive feedback. It may sound like a trigger for a fight, but getting to know yourself and your partner better can be a fun exercise. (A personal user’s manual is also an excellent way to learn about new employees in your business!)

    Learn to listen: Most people listen to what’s being said while preparing an answer in their heads, which means they’re not really listening. Counseling taught us to use “mirroring techniques,” which means putting yourself in the other person’s shoes to try and understand what they’re feeling and how they communicate their feelings. Everyone wants to feel acknowledged and validated; empathy is the best way to show you are listening.

    The three Fs: Another effective technique we learned in counseling, the “three Fs,” comes in handy especially when you need to bring up a touchy subject. Although most know we should tread carefully when approaching a sensitive topic, emotions often get out of hand and a constructive discussion becomes a huge argument. The tendency to place blame can wreak havoc in work and personal relationships.

    Related: The Simple Magic to Working With Your Spouse

    You can be assertive, make sure you’re heard and produce a healthy confrontation using the three Fs: 1) fact, 2) feeling and 3) fair request.

    1. Fact: Start by considering what can be agreed on. Point out the issue objectively and without judgment. Whether a report deadline was missed or a kid was left unpicked up from a soccer game, state the fact of the problem without using the words “you forgot” or “you didn’t do this.”
    2. Feeling: Next, assertively state the mistake’s impact. Because this part expresses a feeling, you should use the word “I” but without placing blame. For example, “Now, I need to work late to file the document,” or “I need to go pick up Jane from soccer.”
    3. Fair request: Finally, it’s time to communicate the need — a specific, reasonable, fair request. “Can we set up a system to remind us of deadlines?” or “Can we have set days to pick up kids from games?”

    Find the right counselor

    All counselors are not created equal, and you may not immediately mesh with the first one you meet. To find a good fit, approach finding a counselor as you would hiring a new employee.

    First, make sure the counselor holds the same values as you and your partner — the same basic belief system. Also, look for a counselor with experience helping couples with marital issues and running a business. After meeting with the counselor, talk to your spouse about how they feel about the person. You may feel the person is a good match, but counseling will most likely fail if your spouse doesn’t.

    Related: What You Need to Make Business Work With Your Spouse

    The biggest mistake many couples make is to view counseling as a way to show your partner you’re right and that the counselor will convince your partner to agree with you. Instead, counseling aims to help couples understand and resolve conflicts to improve their business and home relationships. And it offers couples the right tools to communicate and deal with conflict healthily.

    Working couples need to agree that their relationship comes first and learn to value and prioritize their marriage. Being in business with a spouse should be a unifying experience, where a strong understanding of each other’s work allows both to provide valuable advice and support. And when — inevitably — reunification tactics are needed, counseling can get you back on track.

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    Nellie Akalp

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  • Private Practice Counselors Urged to Help the Overburdened Criminal Justice System

    Private Practice Counselors Urged to Help the Overburdened Criminal Justice System

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    Most offender treatment goes on in the private sector—and more services are needed that target specific offender groups.

    Press Release
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    updated: Apr 25, 2018


    MEMPHIS, Tenn., April 25, 2018 (Newswire.com)
    –
    Few people are aware that America averages over 10 million arrests each year. The vast majority of arrests are for the offenses of driving without a license, shoplifting, and various other misdemeanors. Nearly all of these offenders are quickly processed and released and eventually assigned to a short probation term. Relatively few court jurisdictions have programs for such offenders, but most jurisdictions want specialized programs available for such offenders. Since the mid-1990s several large, private probation companies have aimed treatment programs at some specific offender groups, such as shoplifting offenders. However, their services are primarily offered in larger metropolitan areas leaving rural areas and towns without services that specifically treat specialized groups of low-level offenders. In recent years, private counselors and mental health providers have begun offering specialized counseling groups to offenders as part of an emerging trend that allows such services to be available even in small jurisdictions. It’s a trend that needs to increase and is a needed service in local communities.

    Dr. Greg Little, author of “How to Establish and Build a Private Counseling Practice With Criminal Justice Clients” (2016), wrote, “In essence, the governmental side of criminal justice is so swamped with offenders that it can’t provide all that is needed. In brief, it became clear that the future of offender treatment was going to be specialized and something that could and would be done outside the governmental criminal justice system. Today, the majority of offender treatment probably goes on outside the criminal justice system. It is usually a contracted service and often court assigned. Most of these programs are funded by the offenders themselves. Nearly all of the ‘private’ providers offering such services use focused, cognitive behavioral workbooks designed for specific types of offenses. These programs are nearly always done in groups.”

    In essence, the governmental side of criminal justice is so swamped with offenders that it can’t provide all that is needed. In brief, it became clear that the future of offender treatment was going to be specialized and something that could and would be done outside the governmental criminal justice system. Today, the majority of offender treatment probably goes on outside the criminal justice system.

    Dr. Greg Little, Author

    Little mentions shoplifting, underage drinking, driving without a license, and a host of other offense categories as being treatment areas that counselors and local mental health agencies should target. Services for Veterans are especially needed in rural areas. He adds, “By using evidence-based program materials, you can apply the very best treatment strategies to ensure that you are likely to reduce the chances that the offenders will re-offend. But it’s essential to first gain the trust and confidence of the local jurisdiction. You need to use what works.”

    The first implementation of Little’s shoplifting program was in Nashville, Tennessee nearly a decade ago. “It was a huge implementation and has since been replicated at many sites,” Little stated. “It has been hugely successful. Counselors and local agencies should make efforts to serve the needs of their community by offering the key services that your local criminal justice simply can’t provide.” Such services should include programs for shoplifting offenders, those arrested for underage drinking, driving without a license, failure to provide child support, petty theft, anger management, trauma treatment, and services for Veterans.

    Source: Advanced Training Associates, LLC

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  • CRCD Celebrates City of Los Angeles Youthsource Center Opening in South Los Angeles

    CRCD Celebrates City of Los Angeles Youthsource Center Opening in South Los Angeles

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    Press Release
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    updated: Sep 26, 2017


    LOS ANGELES, September 26, 2017 (Newswire.com)
    –
    The Coalition for Responsible Community Development (CRCD) is proud to announce the grand opening of the Vernon-Central Network YouthSource Center, sponsored by the City of Los Angeles Economic and Workforce Development Department (EWDD), in Los Angeles Council District 9.

    The new Vernon-Central Network YouthSource Center is overseen by EWDD and is one of 14 centers citywide that offer educational and career readiness services for disconnected youth ages 16 to 24 who are neither in school nor working. CRCD, in partnership with All Peoples Community Center and the Los Angeles Conservation Corps, operate the center. CRCD works with Clifford Beers Housing to operate the historic 28th Street YMCA, where the YouthSource will be housed, to bring free services to the area’s most vulnerable.

    I am delighted that we can implement services like those being offered at the Vernon-Central Network YouthSource Center because it positively impacts the lives of our young adults, giving them the tools and resources they need to fulfill their true potential.

    Curren Price, Los Angeles City Councilman

    “With almost one-third of the population in Council District 9 under the age of 18, it is imperative that we create programs our youth need to thrive,” said Councilman Curren Price. “I am delighted that we can implement services like those being offered at the Vernon-Central Network YouthSource Center because it positively impacts the lives of our young adults, giving them the tools and resources they need to fulfill their true potential. I want our youth to know they are a priority and the City of Los Angeles is investing in you because you are critical to the stabilization of future generations.”

    YouthSource is a city-wide program open to young people ages 16-24. All services are free! 

    Some of the opportunities our centers offer include:

    ●     High School Diploma Support
    ●     Paid Job Training
    ●     Access to Tutoring
    ●     Mentoring/Counseling
    ●     College Preparation
    ●     Job Skills Training
    ●     Career Exploration
    ●     Work Readiness

    “As the City partner to the Vernon-Central Network YouthSource Center, we are very excited about the renewed resources for young people to get back in school, to strengthen their skill set and help them and their families feel supported,” said EWDD General Manager Jan Perry.

    Individuals who enroll in the program will have the opportunity to work with CRCD to develop a strategy to find a job and further their education through strong partnerships with key employers and post-secondary institutions. The Vernon-Central Network WorkSource Center on the LATTC campus is operated by CRCD and provides workforce training and job placement.

    “We are very proud to partner with the City of Los Angeles Economic and Workforce Development Department to open the Vernon-Central Network YouthSource Center in South Los Angeles,” commented Mark Wilson, Executive Director of CRCD. “The Vernon-Central Network was established in 2008 with support from the Pfaffinger Foundation to help our at-risk youth people develop job readiness skills and take the next steps in obtaining a job and becoming self-sufficient. Our long-time partnerships with All Peoples Community Center, LA Conservation Corps and Los Angeles Trade Tech have formed the Vernon-Central Network as we work toward our common goal of a stronger South Los Angeles.”

    Source: Coalition for Responsible Community Development

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