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Tag: Britney Spears Sabrina Carpenter

  • Apart from Sabrina Carpenter, the 2025 VMAs Keeps It Pretty Tame (and Straight)

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    Perhaps it was only right that Doja Cat should kick off the 2025 MTV Video Music Awards with a performance of her lead single from Vie, “Jealous Type.” Not just because it throws shade at the notion of how artists get so competitive with one another at these sorts of award shows, but because, with her “new” sound embodying the sonic landscape of the 80s, it’s in keeping with the identity of the erstwhile “cable” network that was born at the dawn of said decade. A channel that changed the entire industry forever in that it made musicians fully grasp that their music was in need of a visual just as memorable (and/or “iconic”) as the song itself.

    To further heighten the overall “80s-ness” of her performance, Doja Cat appeared amidst the kind of set design that can best be described as something out of Patrick Nagel’s wet dreams. And then, of course, there was her decision to tap Kenny G as the person to perform the opening saxophone solo of the track (though, obviously, no saxophone solo will ever hold a candle to the one in “Careless Whisper”). She was also certain to evoke more than slight hints of Janet Jackson in the musical dance break toward the middle of her performance, which was rounded out with a keytar player that looked like a former member of Jem and the Holograms. All of which is to say that there’s definitely a reason the word “nostalgia” was used to describe the ceremony. Since, of late, that’s what MTV has been coasting/banking on in terms of staying afloat. This clearly being part of the reason that, for the first time, the ceremony was also aired on CBS, a network not exactly known for appealing to “youths.”

    In this sense, it’s as though MTV has decided to pander to the Gen Z view of their network as something dated, out of touch and generally “dinosaur-y” (a reality that still seems unfathomable when considering how “edgy” it once used to be). And yet, a great many of the musicians that dominate TikTok were in attendance, including Doja, Tate McRae, Sabrina Carpenter, Sombr and Conan Gray. However, those considered of the “older” generations now, including Mariah Carey and Lady Gaga also took precedence in terms of their performances.

    As for Mariah, who received the Video Vanguard Award this year (marking her first Moonman ever), her medley touched on “Sugar Sweet,” “Fantasy,” “Honey,” “Heartbreaker,” “Obsessed,” “It’s Like That” (interpolated with “Dangerous Type”) and “We Belong Together” (complete with a violin-playing ensemble behind her). And even her alter ego, “Bianca,” made a little cameo onstage. Her first appearance being in the “Heartbreaker” video as “the other woman” that Mariah catches Jerry O’Connell with at the movie theater. Alas, the homage to her greatest hits was more than slightly flaccid, especially since, after Carey’s appearance, she was quickly outshined by the greater dynamism of a live broadcast of Lady Gaga’s performance of “Abracadabra” and “The Dead Dance” from her Mayhem Ball show at Madison Square Garden. This (the fact that Gaga didn’t actually perform at the VMAs venue), however, further proving, in some sense, that the awards show was mostly phoning it in.

    What’s more, Gaga didn’t have a very queer performance, at least not in a “hit you over the head” kind of way. Nor did she have a very sexual one. Even so, there were errant moments of “spiciness.” Namely, when it came to Tate McRae dancing to her hits, “Revolving Door” and “Sportscar,” with her coterie of muscular male backup dancers starting out as “statues” on platforms before jumping in to join her for “Sportscar” and, then, to quite literally play in the same sandbox as her.

    Then, of course, there was Sabrina Carpenter, who, in the absence of both Madonna and Chappell Roan, appeared to take up the mantle for showcasing queerness onstage thanks to her rendition of “Tears.” That queer and trans advocacy being on-brand for the accompanying The Rocky Horror Picture Show-themed video. Throwing it back to late 70s-era New York vibes (since, again, most of the musicians at the VMAs are relying on already overdone sound tropes of the past for their “current” selection of music), Carpenter emerges from a sewer next to a trash bag as drag queens gather ‘round to have a kiki. Toward the end of the performance, there’s a bit of an “It’s Raining Men”-meets-Flashdance-meets Britney singing “…Baby One More Time” during the Dream Within a Dream Tour (and Carpenter is no stranger to imitating her at the VMAs either) moment when water begins raining down on Carpenter and the stripper-looking cops dancing next to her. The queer folk parading around the stage with protest signs that offer such insights as, “If you hate you’ll never get laid,” “Protect Trans Rights” and “Dolls Dolls Dolls” reminded the audience that, with the current administration in office, these are messages well worth reiterating. Particularly before the boot comes down completely, and all such forms of free speech are suppressed.

    Swinging the pendulum back toward straightness, Sombr, who comes off like a mash-up of Benson Boone (sonically and visually) and Austin Butler (just visually), also did his quote unquote best to “sex it up,” albeit with a very straight male perspective as requisite “hot girls” danced around him while he sang “12 to 12.” This after commencing the performance with “Back to Friends.” His only other “male competition” (in the same age bracket, that is) was Conan Gray, who served as this year’s dose of Kate Bush-meets-Chappell Roan with his romantic performance of “Vodka Cranberry.”

    As for the big winners of the night, Lady Gaga, Sabrina Carpenter and Ariana Grande, all three played up their gratitude and appreciation for the fans (this being the go-to for the VMAs, whereas “God” is usually for the Grammys). And yet, one wonders anymore who MTV thinks that demographic includes. For, the older the network gets, it doesn’t appear to matter if they have the “newest” (ergo, youngest) acts onstage. Because, more and more, MTV is playing it as safe as possible—this extending to a kind of “sexlessness” and general lack of controversy compared to years past.

    It’s also saying something that the tameness of the show comes at a time when Paramount (a.k.a. MTV’s “parent” company) is accused of cancelling The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, ultimately, because of an Orange One-related vendetta. Perhaps prompting MTV to keep its content less “offensive” to certain (political) parties, while also trying to keep appealing to the generations it started out with: X and millennial. In other words, the generations that can even still remember what a marvel it was to have cable.

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    Genna Rivieccio

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  • “Please Please Please” As A Theme Song For Britney Spears’ Dating History

    “Please Please Please” As A Theme Song For Britney Spears’ Dating History

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    Perhaps of all the celebrity women who can relate to a song like Sabrina Carpenter’s “Please Please Please,” Britney Spears is the most equipped to do so. Even though it seemed like, at the beginning of her career, the “dating gods” smiled upon her with someone who was as then cachet-laden as Justin Timberlake. That notion didn’t last very long. What’s more, although Timberlake’s behavior and aesthetic should have been embarrassing at the time, it was instead the height of late 90s/early 00s cool (obviously, retroactive embarrassment caught up). Complete with Timberlake’s signature yellow “ramen hair” and, yes, the blaccent that Spears trolls so well in her 2023 memoir, The Woman in Me

    During their approximately three-year relationship, Spears was still in a cushioned period of being “America’s sweetheart.” Alas, once the two broke up and Timberlake went on what amounted to a “she’s a slut” campaign (or, as Spears put it, she was portrayed “as a harlot who’d broken the heart of America’s golden boy”), everything changed for Spears. The media attention she was getting only got worse and worse in terms of fixating on her “skanky” clothing choices and her so-called “bad girl behavior.” And it seemed that Spears, in part, simply decided to fulfill the image that the public had of her—in short, to give the people what they wanted.

    Thus, her first fling after Timberlake (if one doesn’t count the dalliance that catalyzed their breakup, Wade Robson) was none other than Irish bad boy Colin Farrell (whose image has softened since that era). Granted, Spears wouldn’t have described it as a fling. Instead, she noted, “Brawl is the only word for it. We were all over each other, grappling so passionately it was like we were in a street fight.”

    Although that brawl was short-lived, it didn’t take Spears long to find another fling opportunity that she tried to parlay into “till death do us part”: Jason Alexander. As the media ribbed at the time, no, it wasn’t George Costanza that Spears had eloped with, but some backwater childhood friend she found herself in Las Vegas with during a post-New Year’s Eve bender. “Forever” was hardly the word for their fifty-five hour marriage though. And Spears’ parents were quick to swoop in and do “damage control” by demanding that she get the marriage annulled.

    And so, by early 2004, despite Spears’ scant “body count” on the dating history scene, everything had thus far fallen into place to align with the Carpenter-penned plea, “Please, please, please/Don’t prove I’m right/And please, pleasе, please/Don’t bring me to tеars when I just did my makeup so nice/Heartbreak is one thing, my ego’s another/I beg you, don’t embarrass me, motherfucker, oh.”

    Unfortunately, Spears had yet to endure her biggest embarrassment of all: Kevin Federline. And just a few months after her drunken two-day marriage to Alexander, she would meet the odious “K-Fed,” arguably the worst thing that ever happened to Spears in terms of affecting her trajectory and leading it straight to a sham conservatorship. After beginning their torrid romance in the spring of 2004, Spears and Federline would be married on September 18, 2004 (though the marriage wouldn’t technically be legal until October 6, after the prenup was finalized).

    The ceremony itself was a surprise to the guests who had been invited under the pretense that it was an engagement party. But lo and behold, Spears instead offered her guests a wedding befitting of her “Southern trash” vibe at the time. This extended to a menu of chicken fingers, fries and ribs, as well as having everyone change into matching pink Juicy Couture tracksuits once the (faulty) vows had been made. 

    The honeymoon period with K-Fed was quickly over after the back-to-back births of their Virgo children, Sean Preston (September 14, 2005) and Jayden James (September 12, 2006). It seemed Federline was more interested in going out and partying than staying home and raising a family (cue the lyrics, “Well, I have a fun idea, babe/Maybe just stay inside/I know you’re cravin’ some fresh air, but the ceiling fan is so nice”). This revelation dawned on Spears after it was already too late. The disappointment of the marriage, coupled with her postpartum depression, made for a lethal mental health combination. Ergo, all the stars aligned to paint her as having a “breakdown” (or, in other words, a normal reaction to the shit that was going on in her life). By November of ‘06, she had filed for divorce from Federline, just two months after the birth of her second son. 

    In the wake of Federline, there were more “randos” in between, including her AA drug counselor, John Sundahl, and paparazzo Adnan Ghalib, who Spears met soon after shaving her head on February 16, 2007. That relationship lasted until 2008…because, under the rules of the conservatorship, Spears’ dating life would be much more closely monitored. Something Jason Trawick didn’t seem to mind. That Trawick was already Spears’ agent seemed to indicate to Jamie Spears that he had her “best” “business interests” in mind at all times. Maybe that’s why he suspiciously made Trawick a co-conservator in 2012 (yet another reason many speculated him to be a “plant” in Spears’ life). Then there were the subsequent rando pairings of David Lucado (who cheated on her, quelle surprise) and Charlie Ebersol. This brings us to 2016, when Sam Asghari entered the fray after meeting Spears on the video shoot for “Slumber Party.”

    While it seemed, for a time, as though Asghari might not be a shitheel ultimately using Spears as his cash cow like everyone else, things gradually revealed themselves to be slightly more sinister. That Asghari was also an aspiring actor only makes the following Carpenter verse all the more eerie: “I know I have good judgment, I know I have good taste/It’s funny and it’s ironic that only I feel that way/I promise ’em that you’re different and everyone makes mistakes/But just don’t/I heard that you’re an actor, so act like a stand-up guy.” Needless to say, Asghari did not. And Spears has since moved on to one of her worst selections yet: Paul Richard Soliz.

    Hired as a “handyman,” of sorts, on her payroll, Soliz has a criminal record and possesses the same “deadbeat dad” aura of K-Fed. Whether or not Spears has learned her lesson and is just using him to fulfill her fetish for “felon dick” instead of actually trying to turn it into a serious relationship remains to be seen. But maybe, at this point, she knows better than to bother delivering the silent prayer, “I beg you, don’t embarrass me, motherfucker.” Her long-running taste in men pretty much seals the promise of that embarrassment. Which is why Spears might also be thinking to herself, “And we could live so happily if no one knows that you’re with me.”

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    Genna Rivieccio

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