How can you have better relationships with your employees, customers, investors, boss, or anyone else you work with? One simple thing can make a huge difference: Have a conversation about alignment.
That powerful idea comes from Melody Wilding, a human behavior expert, executive coach, and author of Managing Up: How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge (Crown Currency, 2025). The book explores ten conversations that Wilding considers essential. All ten are well worth learning about, but I believe the alignment conversation is the most important of all. And it’s the best place to start.
What is an alignment conversation? It’s a way to learn how your work, or your product, fits in with you customer’s goals. “The alignment conversation is all about figuring out how your work fits into the bigger picture and making sure you and your boss agree on what success looks like,” Wilding writes. The idea applies just as much to a key client or customer. You need to know what your customer hopes to get from working with your or buying your product or service. Otherwise, you’ll never know what success looks like to them. You’ll have to guess about your customer’s priorities and some of the time you may guess wrong.
Making sure you’re meeting customers’ needs.
For example, let’s say they’ve asked for some recommendations about a new initiative they’re considering. You might spend several weeks crunching through the research. You might present them with a polished report, complete with graphics, charts, and detailed data. But the customer might have preferred a more informal estimate delivered in 24 hours or less.
If you’ve never had an alignment conversation, you might never learn that what you delivered didn’t quite fit their needs. But if you and your customer regularly discuss their objectives and how your work fits in with those, chances are you’ll know whether a quick estimate or a detailed report is the better offering in this specific situation. Better yet, you’ll have a much clearer idea of what work to prioritize, and where you might be wasting your time.
Although Wilding is focused on readers’ relationship with their boss, it’s just as important to have the alignment conversation with everyone who works for you. That will help them be more productive because they’ll know which tasks really make a difference and which don’t add much value. If they’re feeling overwhelmed with too many tasks and aren’t sure where to start, the alignment conversation will help them figure out their priorities.
Have the conversation with employees too.
And the alignment conversation with your employees should be a two-way street. You should tell the employee about your goals and priorities, but also ask about theirs. How does working for your company fit with their objectives? Not everyone will give you a straightforward answer to this question. But the more you know about their goals, the more you can do to keep them happy and engaged. For example, if someone wants to climb to the top of your industry, you can look for opportunities for them to speak at conferences. If someone else is balancing work with parenting small children, you can provide greater flexibility in their job.
How to ask for an alignment conversation.
It’s best to schedule the conversation in advance so there will be enough time to fully explore the topic. That will give you time to dig deeper and ask follow-up questions to make sure you fully understand what they have in mind.
If you and the other person have never had one before, asking for an alignment conversation may feel a bit awkward. But most people appreciate being asked about their objectives and priorities, so it will usually be a welcome topic. Wilding recommends saying something like this: “I’d like to make sure we’re on the same page when it comes to our priorities. Chatting about this would help me better understand what’s top of mind for you.”
Have the alignment conversation regularly.
Finally, don’t let the alignment conversation be a one-time event. Goals and priorities change over time. So you should probably plan to have an alignment conversation at least every six months to a year. After all, the better aligned you are with your customers, employees, and other key stakeholders, the better it will be for your business, and for you.
There’s a growing audience of Inc.com readers who receive a daily text from me with a self-care or motivational micro-challenge or tip. Often, they text me back and we wind up in a conversation. (Want to know more? Here’s some information about the texts and a special invitation to a two-month free trial.) Many of my subscribers are entrepreneurs or business leaders. They know how important it is to make sure they’re aligned with what their customers and other stakeholders care about. Having an alignment conversation can be a great way to do that. Should you give it a try?
The opinions expressed here by Inc.com columnists are their own, not those of Inc.com.