Tag: Aaron D'Anthony Brown

5 Prayers for Stronger Communication and Connection in Today’s Culture
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Connection isn’t easy, but the experience is worthwhile. The tighter our bonds with other people, the better our marriages, families, and children. The impact even extends from our homes all the way to society at large. Political strife becomes nonexistent, and wars obsolete. With so many people walking the Earth today and technology so readily available, none of us have to go through life alone, yet, the current loneliness epidemic indicates that many people are doing just that.

Any one of us can look around and take note of the sheer number of broken families, superficial friendships, and people in need of constant affirmation. These factors are all representative of a culture that has fallen short of an ideal community.
But why is loneliness so rampant?

There are many answers to that question, but they all boil down to one key answer – our culture promotes living more for ourselves and less for God. “Iron sharpens iron, and one person sharpens another” is one of many verses in Scripture highlighting the benefits and importance of connection (Proverbs 27:17, CSB). At the heart of these various passages, we understand that connection is formed when we live both in service to God and to other people.

However, our society encourages self-care over care for others. Add that to the natural awkwardness that comes with talking to people and the fear of uncertainty and rejection we so often feel. This leads many of us to stick to our comfort zone. Plus, we can chat via social media without making ourselves vulnerable in any meaningful way and ghost anyone when we get too uneasy.

Yet, the results show. Doing things the way we have been will ensure that loneliness continues to thrive. Only by reclaiming the lost art of communication can we hope to end this epidemic.

And how do we do that? The solution is two-fold: we act, and we pray.

I know first-hand what the struggle with loneliness looks and feels like in the darkest way, but I’ve never quite understood those who complain about loneliness and do nothing to change their circumstances. Loneliness may be something you’re struggling with today, but you have some control over what tomorrow looks like.

Here are a few ways you can start building connections with other people:
- Get involved in church or a recreational group.
- Strike up conversations with strangers at the store, library, and similar places.
- Make plans to connect with someone you know.
- Abandon any fear of coming off as weird or awkward.
- Consider how you can grow relationally wherever God has placed you currently.
In addition to acting, the Bible calls us to pray on the things we care about (1 Peter 5:7). God is invested in your well-being and, therefore, in your connections. If there’s any doubt you want to assuage for yourself or anyone else, then here are five prayers for stronger communication and connection in today’s culture.

A Prayer for Communication

God,

I come before you now with deep concerns for my culture. Today’s people are not centered around you. We’re occupied with ourselves and our interests. Dedication to you and our neighbors has fallen by the wayside.

Unsurprisingly, a lot of people are lonely.

But God, truthfully, even those who choose to follow you find themselves lonely today. There just aren’t as many people who are after your heart.

So, we feel lonely if we chase you and lonely if we don’t.

Lord, I pray that you would help all of us to first find stability in you. Let those who know you, learn more, and those who don’t, find Christ. Help us to get to know you, understand you, and ultimately, dedicate our lives to you. From there, I pray that we would learn to communicate better with one another. Help us to become more aware of one another’s needs and discern how to better serve one another.

These days, there’s so much conflict, so much arguing, and everybody wants to be right. We all seem to be suffering, yet no one knows how to come together. Please, give us the tools to cooperate. Instead of sweeping problems under the rug and ignoring what obviously burdens us, Lord, would you grant us the courage to speak up? Would you give us the courage to be humble? Would you show us how to make tomorrow better than today?

Thank you, Lord. Amen.

A Prayer for Self-Awareness

Lord,

I pray for greater self-awareness in today’s culture. So many of us can easily diagnose the problems in others, but we have a difficult time holding a mirror up to ourselves. Something about being honest about our problems makes us afraid. Perhaps we feel incapable of change, prideful, or just plain lazy. I suppose everybody has their reason, but I pray that no excuse would ultimately prevent us from growing, both to you and one another.

Amen.

A Prayer for Humility

Father,

Humility makes such a difference when we communicate. However, humility is in short supply today. We think about ourselves all the time, and culture pushes us to do so. Proverbs 21:2 says that every man is right in his own eyes, but you weigh our hearts. I pray that you will move in your people today to create a culture of humility. Change our hearts to think of ourselves less often and to have more thoughts about you and other people. Make the church the embodiment of humility, and may our example go on to change the culture at large.

Amen.

A Prayer for Reconciliation

God,

This society is in need of deep reconciliation. Families have been broken apart, marriages abandoned, and children neglected. Has anyone been spared from some kind of hurt in recent years? There are societal problems related to transgenderism, the Covid response, and so many other political topics. The media tells us to treat those who disagree with us like our enemies. Social media encourages the same. And the fact that we don’t know how to communicate well with each other doesn’t help.

Lord, please restore sensibility to our culture. Restore a sense of civility. Give us a greater understanding of those we disagree with and ourselves. Just as we see the shortcomings in others, please help us to be introspective, too. The more we know, the greater our problem-solving can be.

Help us to come together again as a society before things get any worse.

In Jesus’ name. Amen.

A Prayer for Change

Lord,

Loneliness is being labeled an epidemic, and truthfully, I see no end to it in sight. People complain about loneliness and yet seem to be working against finding connection. Then there are those working hard to find connection and praying to you, yet still coming up short. What are we to do, God? How do we actually make change?

Could you please show us the way out of this strife? Please bring an end to this loneliness, both for individuals and for society. Deliver us into a brighter tomorrow where we can experience the beauty of connection with you and people.

Amen.

Conclusion

Connection isn’t easy. It’s hard. But the experience is worthwhile. There will be times in life when you feel lonely, either in the absence or presence of other people. I’ve been there, and more than once. Yet, what I have also realized, and what I hope you learn too, is that though you feel lonely, you are never truly alone, not because of people but because of God. He is always present.

Loneliness is a result of reality contrasting with our expectations. When we rewrite our thinking and focus more on what we have than what we don’t, our attitude changes. We begin to see God more than what we lack. And while that doesn’t erase what we don’t have, and believe me, human connection is important, connecting with God does remind us that we can get through the day. He will provide our needs. All because He cares.

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Christina @ wocintechchat.com

Aaron D’Anthony Brown is a freelance writer, hip-hop dance teacher, and visual artist, living in Virginia. He currently contributes work to iBelieve, Crosswalk, and supports various clients through the platform Upwork. He’s an outside-the-box thinker with a penchant for challenging the status quo. Check out his short story “Serenity.”

LISTEN: A Prayer for a Fresh New Start

The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Salem Web Network and Salem Media Group.

This article is part of our Prayer resource meant to inspire and encourage your prayer life when you face uncertain times. Visit our most popular prayers if you are wondering how to pray or what to pray. Remember, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us, and God knows your heart even if you can’t find the words to pray.

Serenity Prayer
The Lord’s Prayer
Prayer for Peace
Morning Prayers
Good Night Prayers

Prayer for Healing
Prayer for Protection
Prayer for God’s Help
Prayer for Anxiety
Prayer for Strength

WATCH: Daily Prayers of Thanksgiving

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Now available is our new Daily Prayer devotional! An easy way to start your day with prayer: read today’s prayer and sign up to receive it by email.
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Aaron D’Anthony Brown

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January 9, 2024
When to Care and When Not to As Christians

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When should we care, and when should we not? As a Christian, this question can feel delicate and confusing at times. The Bible tells us over and over again to express care for those around us. We see commandments to love, to share the Gospel, and even to admonish other believers. But what exactly does the Bible say about people who don’t want to be cared for or people who want to continue making the same mistakes no matter how much you want to help?

There’s a certain older lady I know who’s Christian and has a transgender coworker. The coworker leans on her perceived identity and demands that others affirm her. Entitlement has led her to be ignored and ostracized at work. No one wants conflict or to offend. Despite the behaviors, the older lady wanted to show love to this coworker, realizing by just the transgender status alone that the woman was hurting deep within her soul. Despite having a desire to help, the coworker ended up getting the older woman in trouble with HR – an issue of misgendering, I was told.

While the lady told me she didn’t care what the coworker did, the fact that she shared with me unsolicited told me that she was hurt. I would be, too. You show love to someone who obviously lacks in that department, and then they turn around and stab you in the back. They put you and your job in jeopardy. Do you continue to show how much you care, or do you stop altogether?

We all encounter this question in one way or another. That could come in the form of helping someone overcome addiction whilst seeing and doubting their desire to be clean or trying to encourage someone who is bent on being cynical no matter what positive things occur.

When should we care, and when should we not?

Among other passages, the Bible has a couple of verses that can help us find clarity on the topic.

“Don’t answer a fool according to his foolishness or you’ll be like him yourself. Answer a fool according to his foolishness or he’ll become wise in his own eyes.” (Proverbs 26:4-5)

Based on these two verses and a general understanding of the Bible and how Jesus operated, we can conclude two things. First, we should always care about other people. At least in the general sense, imitating God’s love for them. We should have some concern about their health, their salvation, and general well-being. Secondly, we should not always care about such issues as offending someone, not when our motivations are in the right place.

Finding the balance requires some tact. There is always a time to care, but there are also times when we should not care. Let’s explore that balance and figure out what caring and not caring should look like in our lives.

Understand Why You Care

In order to properly serve the people in your life, you will benefit them and yourself by understanding your motivations. Ask yourself why you care (or don’t). Scripture says that we love because God first loved us (1 John 4:19). God made us all in His image and planned our lives before a single one began (Psalm 139:16). When we see God as being the author of other people’s lives, not just our own, we tend to see them in a different light. We don’t want to leave them to our sins because, like God, we care.

If you’re the sort of person who doesn’t care about anyone who doesn’t affect your life, then you’re not seeing them as God does. That’s wrong.

God is not asking us to get emotionally invested in everyone we come across. That’s impossible. But we can show everyone we come across God’s love by acknowledging their humanity and wanting what’s best for them, even if we are not involved in that process.

Do You Care More Than They Do?

One justifiable reason to not care, or to care less, is when you want what’s best for a person more than they want it for themselves. Whatever the circumstances, do you care more about the situation or the relationship than they do? That’s a valuable question when deciding whether or not to take a step back.

There’s a guy I’ve tried supporting on a number of occasions. He’s an elderly man who has not been able to find (or hold) a job in five years. Aside from listening to his anecdotes, I’ve bought him groceries, assisted him with applying for jobs, and especially tried to encourage him to change his perspective. His heart remains hardened, and his cynicism is as strong as ever. He insists that life is against him. Yet, he spends hours during the day not applying to jobs, but reading the newspaper.

How can someone so destitute waste so much time?

Caring more than the other person doesn’t necessarily mean we should not care at all, but we should draw a line somewhere so that we don’t overexert ourselves.

Set Boundaries

Caring requires boundaries. While we are called to love as God loves, we are not called to love them in a way that ruins us. Nor are we called to love everyone deeply. This is where you have to seek God for discernment. He wants us to carry one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2). A difficult relationship or circumstance is no excuse to give up and stop caring. However, we need to know what is a healthy and realistic amount of difficulty. We should not default to our own understanding or the supposed wisdom of others either. God and His infinite wisdom. Caring too much can, at worst, jeopardize our faith and health. Care too little, and we are not representing Christ for that person. The bottom line is that you should care about the other person; the question is how much and how will that care be shown.

To Offend or Not Offend

Offending people does not make you un-Christian. Read Scripture enough, and you will see that Jesus offended plenty of people. That’s why they wanted Him dead. Being Christian in modern America is enough reason to offend someone nowadays. That being said, there are plenty of occasions where offending is not only justified but good. If someone is being rude and they are unaware, tell them. That may hurt their feelings, but we benefit from being corrected. The same applies to how we discipline children or how we call out anyone for behavior that is problematic. Offending people is good, so long as your motivations are coming from a good place. Do you offend because you are trying to help the other person grow or for some other reason?

Pray for the Person

We can’t always take a hands-on approach to caring for people. There’s only so much bandwidth any of us possesses and only so many places we can throw our energy in a day. However, when we are hands-off with a person, we can always show our care through prayer. We aren’t always able to help people change, especially when we don’t know them well. On the contrary, God does know them well, and He is acutely aware of where they can grow and how they should go about doing so. Take your cares to Him.

Conclusion

We should care about people. Jesus did. Scripture tells us to. But we shouldn’t care too much to the point of idolization, nor too little to the point of not adhering to our faith. There’s definitely a balance to strike, but all in all, certain things we care about or not, but we should always care about people.

Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/Sanja Radin

Aaron D’Anthony Brown is a freelance writer, hip-hop dance teacher, and visual artist, living in Virginia. He currently contributes work to iBelieve, Crosswalk, and supports various clients through the platform Upwork. He’s an outside-the-box thinker with a penchant for challenging the status quo. Check out his short story “Serenity.”

LISTEN: Being Complete in Jesus (Understanding Matthew 5:21-48)

Hearing Jesus is a devotional journey through the gospels, where we explore the teachings of Jesus chapter by chapter. If you’re seeking to live a life that reflects God’s, this podcast is for you.

The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Salem Web Network and Salem Media Group.

WATCH: 10 Sins Christians Downplay (and Why They’re So Destructive)

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October 17, 2023
5 Prayers for a Broken Family

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Growing up, children and adults alike marveled at my household. Three children and two parents married for decades. What I didn’t realize until later in life was that having both parents in the house was once the norm. These days, such households are the exception.

Over 20 million children in America come from fatherless homes. Depending on where you live, that number can be as high as 60%. The older I become, the clearer I see the effect of fatherless homes, and not just fatherless homes, but broken homes.

Parents who don’t get along. Children who don’t get along with their parents. There are children who don’t keep in touch with their parents, out of choice. Others who don’t like, even hate their parents. Young kids with their faces stuck on screens and chasing false identities. The divorce rate is high, and so many children are born out of wedlock that many of them don’t see a purpose to marriage.

Certainly, there’s a lot of pain and suffering going on in the world today. How much of this pain traces back to the home, to our broken families?

Hurt people hurt people, as the adage goes. The full truth is that we’re all hurting in one way or another. Each of us carries some degree of brokenness (Romans 3:23).

We will never be perfect people on this side of life, but we can strive to be better. Our families will never be immaculate, but we can work to improve them. And when we can’t control a circumstance, or a person, or many people, we can and always should pray. Here are 5 prayers for a broken family.

Prayer for an End to Conflict

Lord,

My family and I have been caught up in conflict for far too long and for so many reasons. I don’t remember when our problems started.

We can’t get together anymore without someone saying or doing something that offends another, even on holidays. I’m saddened by all of this and afraid that there will never be an end to the conflict.

So, I come before you now, eagerly asking you to soften our hearts, to help us make amends with one another. I pray that we would strive to embody the grace and forgiveness that you have toward us. Give us kind words and gentle hearts. Show us a better way to interact. Help us end the conflict.

We’ve bickered for so long, but conflict doesn’t have to last forever. I pray that it won’t. Help us embrace a godly love much like the father did the prodigal son. With the hurtful past behind us, we can move forward in a healthier and united future.

Amen.

Prayer for Reconciliation

Heavenly Father,

With all that’s going on in the world, conflict within the family feels like an unnecessary problem added to all the things happening. We can, however, reconcile, but we don’t see a need. Everybody wants to be right, and at times, even me. Lord, I pray to you with a request to soften our hearts. Remind us of the importance of forgiveness. A grudge is a burden, one that we carry and remind ourselves of constantly. But when we choose forgiveness, we let go of the burden and choose to embrace your way of living instead. Please help us to see your way as the better way. Help us to trade words of cruelty for words of affirmation and trade resentment for reconciliation.

Your way is better.

Thank you, Lord. Amen.

Prayer for Forgiveness

Lord,

If we could tally all of our sins over the years, the number would exceed anything that we imagine. The number would cause us to grieve and feel shame. The number would damn us to Hell, and yet you chose to forgive us.

I thank you for the forgiveness afforded to us through Jesus, but I would be a liar if I claimed to forgive just as easily.

Lord, my family is embroiled in animosity and even in the moments when we aren’t, the tension is palpable. We don’t like each other, and the reason is that we have not chosen to forgive. Too often do we act like forgiving is the end of the world. We would much rather have revenge than let something go.

I’m sorry, God. I ask that you forgive me and my family. Help us to get right with you, and then get right with one another. Forgiveness is the way to living life without the need for retaliation, to living life joyfully with family.

Help us to forgive and become more like your Son.

In Jesus’ name. Amen.

God,

We can’t erase the past. I can’t. My family can’t. But we do have control over today and how we walk into our future. Lord, I ask that whatever hurt was done in the past, we would choose to forgive one another. We can’t erase the hurt, but you can heal us. Please any and all of our broken relationships. Take our family’s broken pieces and make us whole again. And as we come back together, I pray that our love will be stronger than ever before.

Thank you for hearing my prayer. Amen.

Prayer for Gratitude

Lord,

I thank you for the family that I have. Thank you for the good times and the bad, the times when I was able to serve them, and the times when I was served. I thank you for the best memory and the worst, the moments of laughter and the times when we couldn’t help but cry.

I may not always see eye to eye with my family, but I recognize the blessing in my life that is family. I recognize that not everyone has a father, a mother, a sister, a brother, a cousin, and so on. And so, I am grateful for those that I do have, the moments we do share.

Thank you for being a part of our lives even when we chose not to recognize you. Even when we still do.

I pray that as we move forward into our future, day by day, you would draw us not just closer to one another but to you. And as we draw near, help us to love one another more and more in a way that you have shown.

In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Valentina Shilkina

Aaron D’Anthony Brown is a freelance writer, hip-hop dance teacher, and visual artist, living in Virginia. He currently contributes work to iBelieve, Crosswalk, and supports various clients through the platform Upwork. He’s an outside-the-box thinker with a penchant for challenging the status quo. Check out his short story “Serenity.”

Related podcast:

The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Salem Web Network and Salem Media Group.

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Stock Footage & Music Courtesy of Soundstripe.com Thumbnail by Getty Images

Now available is our new Daily Prayer devotional! An easy way to start your day with prayer: read today’s prayer and sign up to receive it by email.

This article is part of our Prayer resource meant to inspire and encourage your prayer life when you face uncertain times. Visit our most popular prayers if you are wondering how to pray or what to pray. Remember, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us and God knows your heart even if you can’t find the words to pray.

Serenity Prayer
The Lord’s Prayer
Prayer for Peace
Morning Prayers
Good Night Prayers

Prayer for Healing
Prayer for Protection
Prayer for God’s Help
Prayer for Anxiety
Prayer for Strength

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Aaron D’Anthony Brown

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October 10, 2023
6 Guiding Verses about Family Relationships

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One day my grandmother will pass away, and that day will mark a distinctly dark time for my family. Grandparents tend to be the meeting place where older and younger generations gather for food and good times, especially during the holidays. My grandmother is no exception. Cooking on more Sundays than I can count. Hosting for just about every holiday. I’m not sure what will happen once she dies.

Being the family glue requires time and effort, an amount most of us don’t showcase. We get so used to seeing the same faces at various functions. We take the relationships, however meaningful or insignificant, for granted. See you next time, we say, parting ways.

But what happens when we don’t?

What happens when so-and-so gets into a car crash or so-and-so goes to prison? Suddenly, life turns upside down in ways we never could have predicted.

Beyond taking the existence of our relatives for granted, many of us today find our families dissolving, often before we’re old enough to realize. Take one look around, perhaps a look in the mirror, and you’re likely to find someone who comes from divorce, a blended family, a single-parent household, someone raised by a grandparent instead of a mom or a dad. We see all around us people sprung from less-than-ideal families.

And then they, we, produce our own less-than-ideal families. The cycle continues so on and so forth.

Even within families, there’s a disconnect between the generations. The older adults treat the younger ones as though they are still children, neglecting to listen or give the same respect that they expect. Younger adults don’t look after the elderly as was once custom in the culture. And the children, our children, are unable to socialize well with anyone, even other kids. They’re stuck on their devices, preferring the company of a phone to a person.

There are so many barriers to producing and maintaining a family, especially in the way God desires.

Do any of us ever stop to wonder, how should we treat our relatives? Does anybody wonder what the ideal family looks like?

I don’t pretend to have all the answers or even present myself as someone who has a strong relationship with family. What I can say with certainty is that Scripture admonishes us about how we ought to treat one another, how we ought to treat our families. These words of wisdom can be edifying if we allow them. Let’s look at these six guiding verses about family relationships:

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/imtmphoto

How to Treat Spouses

“Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body.” (Ephesians 5:22-23)

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word.” (Ephesians 5:25-26)

Scripture outlines in such detail how we should treat one another that little is left to the imagination. We may not always understand the why behind God’s tenets, but He gives us clear direction. In summary, as believers, we submit to God in faith. That submission determines how we treat other people. Likewise, when we marry, we submit to our spouse and treat them in a godly fashion.

Where our marriages struggle today is the lack of submission to one another. Instead of a covenantal union, we opt for something more akin to a business partnership. People get married with the idea of forging a 50/50 relationship so that they aren’t taken advantage of by the other person. Yet, the scorekeeping makes us more likely to find ‘evidence’ of just that. The end result, as many of us have experienced, is divorce – the death of a marriage.

We can escape this trend by changing how we treat marriage and the dating process that precedes it. With a focus on serving our spouse, we will cause the marriage and, as a result, our children to flourish.

How to Treat Children

“Start a youth out on his way; even when he grows old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6)

Society ends without the creation of more children, as do family lines. We as individuals benefit from children too. They humble us, make us laugh, and even cry. They have an uncanny ability to point us back to God as our creator and provider. As great as they are, societal trends are encouraging adults not to become parents. Aside from the atrocity of abortion, young people are being encouraged not to have children at all. Lifestyles like SINK (single income, no kids) are glamorized on social media.

There’s no doubt that having children comes with challenges, the expected and unexpected variety, but when we find ourselves single, and everyone else is tucked away with their spouses and children, we could find ourselves in bad shape, especially as we grow older.

For those of us who have children, we must remember that raising them in a God-fearing way doesn’t equal incessant coddling, nor does it mean acting as a micromanager for their every decision. We’re called to teach wisdom, and adhere to the same wisdom we give. There’s no point in telling them to socialize and not be on their devices if we ourselves don’t know how to communicate. How else can we be role models? Living by the ideology of “do what I say, not as I do” is a clear sign of hypocrisy and not worthy of emulation.

How to Treat Parents

“Honor your father and your mother so that you may have a long life in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.” (Exodus 20:12)

Culturally, our treatment of the elderly has taken a nosedive, probably because how we treat our parents has significantly changed. The increase in divorce and broken families has not led to children having more respect for their elders, but less.

Part of the solution is for our elders to set a better example, but ultimately we can’t control them. We can only control ourselves and use the insight God has given us on how to behave. What He says is to honor our parents. There are no explicit caveats to the commandment. Honoring our parents is a display of gratitude both to them and to God. The end result strengthens our family bonds and gives our children insight into how to treat us.

Admittedly, following this commandment can be difficult. Our parents aren’t perfect, and sometimes, maybe often, their idiosyncrasies annoy us to no end. Sometimes they hurt us. But as believers, do we envision God wanting us to live in such a way where we have no contact with family just because they bother us? Or can we instead set boundaries that protect us and still allow us to have an honoring relationship?

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How to Treat the Elderly

“Listen to your father who gave you life, and don’t despise your mother when she is old.” (Proverbs 23:22)

Wisdom comes with experience, and the elderly often have experience. Maybe grandpa needs help setting up a Facebook account, but he knows the importance of marriage and hard work. Young people, myself included, take for granted the wisdom held by older generations. The temptation is to look down on them for being physically inept or socially unaware. Phrases like “Okay Boomer,” give us a good laugh, but what exactly are we doing to show appreciation to those who came before us? Our answer to that question should inform how we can expect the younger generations to treat us.

How to Treat the Youth

“My dear brothers and sisters, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” (James 1:19)

As a society, young people usually get a bad rep for not listening. They see themselves as having all the answers, but ask none of the questions. This is the critique by teachers of their students, and parents of their children, whether as kids or adults. There’s truth to this. Ignorance is bliss, and younger folks are more likely to be ignorant, depending on the subject. However, what society and families don’t grapple with as much is the lack of listening older folks offer to younger people.

Being older does not automatically make you wiser. Everyone grows old, naturally. There’s no effort we put in. Our bodies simply age. Wisdom comes from experience, first-hand and second-hand. Parents and other older adults do themselves and their relationships a disservice when they decide not to listen, figuring that there’s “nothing you can tell me” or “I’m X years older than you.”

This does not mean everything a young person says is valid – we know that is not the case. But every word a young person says shouldn’t be readily dismissed just because a young person said them. And every word spoken by the elderly is not true simply because they spoke it.

Conclusion

Nobody’s perfect, and therefore no family is perfect. The ideal family simply doesn’t exist. Yet, despite the fact that we will never be as immaculate as Christ, we are still called to emulate Him. That same dedication to growth and positive change should be what we give to our families. Broken marriages and broken homes don’t have to be the norm. As a society, we make that determination.

As a society, we set the rules for how we engage one another. We can choose to care for and adhere to the wisdom of older generations. At the same time, we can respect and acknowledge the worthiness of younger adults. We can be positive examples of communication for our children, showing, not just telling them, that in-person human connection trumps anything you can garner from a device.

We can do this every time we get together, at every function, with all of our relatives. Maybe that’s the ideal family.

Sometimes I still imagine my Nana will live forever, maintaining the same level of gray on her head, wrinkles on her skin, and tolerable health issues in her body. I imagine her being around even after I’m gone, still serving those delicious home-cooked meals to relatives and people from church.

The truth is, she will leave. She will die. But until that day comes, I will continue trying to love her as I believe Jesus would have me, not taking her existence for granted but cherishing her. May we all learn to do that with all of our relatives, redeeming the time afforded to us. Day by day by day.

Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Bassitt ART

Aaron D’Anthony Brown is a freelance writer, hip-hop dance teacher, and visual artist, living in Virginia. He currently contributes work to iBelieve, Crosswalk, and supports various clients through the platform Upwork. He’s an outside-the-box thinker with a penchant for challenging the status quo. Check out his short story “Serenity.”

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The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Salem Web Network and Salem Media Group.

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These verses serve as a source of renewal for the mind and restoration for the heart by reinforcing the notion that, while human weakness is inevitable, God’s strength is always available to uplift, guide, and empower us.

Video stock video and music probided by SoundStripe

Originally published Thursday, 21 September 2023.

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Aaron D’Anthony Brown

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September 21, 2023
4 Ways to Cultivate Deeper Relationships with Other Christians

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With all the laughter, smiles, and camaraderie I see day to day at church, the library, the grocery store, wherever, I struggle to believe that about 1 in 3 people suffers from loneliness. If anything, I seem to be the only one.

Looking around, everyone else appears connected to family, friends, and more. But in this case, the statistics aren’t wrong. Dig a bit deeper, talk to some folks, do some research, and the truth becomes clear. We are lonely people.

With the advent of technology, social media, the response to the recent pandemic, loneliness is high. Very high.

And the reason I think I’m alone in loneliness is part of the reason many of us suffer. Loneliness is a problem we don’t acknowledge and thus, never resolve.

When I think about Christian relationships, especially friendships, one verse always comes to mind. “Iron sharpens iron, and one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). Two people have the potential to bring out the best in one another. What a pleasant verse to consider when venturing to church every Sunday, or small group, or meeting a fellow Christian somewhere else in the world. The issue is that too often, another cultural norm manifests.

People don’t mingle with strangers, they stick to those they know, and even then, conversations are kept to the surface. Nothing too deep, nothing too revealing. Otherwise, we risk being vulnerable. When someone asks, “How are you?” the answer is always the same, “Good.” And on impulse, you return the question, and they say the same thing. Every Sunday. Every time. Without fail.

But you aren’t always doing good, and neither are they, and neither am I.

How does iron sharpen iron when we aren’t honest with one another, or being more intentional and connecting on a deeper level? Instead of saying “Good,” we could say, “I’ve actually been feeling pretty lonely,” but such a response is too open, too honest, too awkward.

This is one of the issues plaguing the church and our society as a whole. today. From scandals, to political conflict, to dating, we struggle to understand one another because we struggle to communicate.

As Christians, we say that we’re committed to living like Christ, but without meaningful connections, how much faith are we actually showing?

Let’s try a different approach. Here are four ways we can cultivate deeper relationships with other Christians.

1. Be Intentional

“My dear brothers and sisters, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” (James 1:19)

The reason many Christians fall into the lie of saying, “I’m good,” in response to, “How are you?” is because we’re being unintentional. We’re going through the motions of being polite without being real. No relationship can develop depth without being real.

Here’s what we do instead – be specific instead of generic. Don’t ask someone how they’re doing that day. Ask them about something specific that relates to them. Work. Family. Hobbies. Goals. Even better, follow up on a topic that they’ve shared before.

Don’t you appreciate it when people remember important dates or events in your life? Other people appreciate the same. Show them how much you care and watch the relationship grow.

2. Prioritize the Other Person

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves.” (Philippians 2:3)

Many of us can name at least one person we try to avoid, not because they’re mean, but because they make every conversation about them. Every conversation.

Listening is a great way of serving others, but if you’re like me, never getting a chance to talk about yourself can be draining. Moreover, you start to get the impression that you’re more of a tool than someone that they actually care about. Or maybe you are that person that makes most conversations about you.

If relationships are going to be mutual, both people need to be seen as important. Enter into conversations not eager to talk about what you did over the weekend, but focus instead on the other person. And don’t go tit for tat every time they say something either. Instead, ask follow-up questions and delay talking about yourself. You’ll feel great for serving the other person and will feel happy once you see that same behavior mirrored for you.

Prioritize the other person, but not to their detriment or yours.

3. Be Vulnerable

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is very powerful in its effect.” (James 5:16)

Choosing to be vulnerable with someone allows for trust to grow. Within any relationship, some trust is given at the start, but the rest is earned. By being vulnerable, you give someone the opportunity to prove themselves (or not), which means potentially cultivating a deeper relationship.

This doesn’t always pay off, but despite some people sinning against us, that doesn’t mean everyone would treat us the same way. Eventually, someone will show us the love we deserve as image-bearers of God.

4. Abide by the Golden Rule

“Therefore, whatever you want others to do for you, do also the same for them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” (Matthew 7:12)

When thinking about ways to deepen our relationships with fellow Christians, the easiest thing to do is consider what’s important to us in a relationship. What would we want someone to do for us as a friend, lover, or relative? Whatever the answer, we should do those same things for others.

Want people to ask about things important to you? Do the same for them.

Want people to listen to you? Do the same for them.

The Golden rule is a great guide for managing any and all relationships.

Conclusion

If we are to consider the church a family and talk so much about loving one another, then we need to ensure we’re living this out as best we can. Our love will never meet the ideal, but where there is room for improvement, we can always strive to be better. And the deeper our commitment to one another, the less pervasive loneliness will ever be.

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/ Maskot

Aaron D’Anthony Brown is a freelance writer, hip-hop dance teacher, and visual artist, living in Virginia. He currently contributes work to iBelieve, Crosswalk, and supports various clients through the platform Upwork. He’s an outside-the-box thinker with a penchant for challenging the status quo. Check out his short story “Serenity.”

Related podcast:

The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Salem Web Network and Salem Media Group.

So when sin is not being confronted, or even viewed as sin at all, it’s time to address it with the hope of gently helping to restore believers caught in its web.

Here are 10 sins that often go overlooked in Christian community.

Stock Footage & Music Courtesy of Soundstripe.com Thumbnail by Getty Images

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Aaron D’Anthony Brown

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September 12, 2023
6 Prayers for Broken (or Breaking) Relationships

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Recently, a woman I’ve known for a while approached me with a topic I have heard several times before from many people. A story all too common today. A story of conflict, one that may end in divorce. She, like so many others, is contending with a difficult relationship. In her mind, the only way out is out.

While I tried to offer a different perspective, one that doesn’t entertain the thought of divorce or prioritize happiness for self, her mind was focused on escaping the broken relationship if it cannot be fixed.

Part of me wanted her to see my point of view, but part of me understood. Certainly, we can all relate to a desire to be right, especially when we’ve been wronged. We can all relate to the experience of having conflict with those closest to us.

We can relate to the feeling of a relationship that is either broken or on its way toward freefall.

Relatives, past friends, or past lovers. The angst of a broken relationship can sit with us for months, years, if not a lifetime. The fear of losing what we’ve spent time building can haunt us just the same.

Where are your relationships today? In prosperity? On the verge of utter collapse?

If, like this woman, you find yourself in a tough place, there’s always one thing you can and should do. Pray. Pray like your relationship depends on it.

Here are six prayers for broken (or breaking) relationships.

A Prayer for Guidance

Lord,

I come before you now seeking the sort of clarity only you can provide. I’m at a loss. Anger, sadness, and confusion keep me from seeing what’s right. I want to make the next step, but I’m not sure what that next step should be. Conflict has led to division in my life, a division that has brought about more than I expected. More than I think I can handle.

These days, my relationship doesn’t have the same sense of comfort, trust, or security. I want things to get better, but I also want our problems to get resolved.

What does that look like? What should I do, and what shouldn’t I do?

Could you provide me with insight on how to go about fixing this brokenness? Am I able to? Whatever the case, help me to respond to conflict in a way that honors you in this relationship.

Please, Lord, and thank you. Amen.

A Prayer for Mutual Understanding

God,

Is there anyone more patient, more forgiving, more wise than you? I need help becoming more like you right now. I’ve tried to reconcile, but my efforts have not worked. At least not yet. There seems to be a lack of understanding on both sides. That’s why I’m praying to you, asking for the insight that I lack. Help both of us to see what remains to be seen. Give us clarity where we lack understanding, and may that new insight promote us in a good direction. May that new insight bring us closer to you.

In your son’s name. Amen.

God,

Conflict has done a number on my relationship. Trust is gone. Love is scary. I’m just not sure what the future holds, if anything. I don’t want my relationship to end, but I don’t see a relationship with all this baggage I carry. Please help us to find healing and forgiveness. No matter how difficult that may seem. May that healing and forgiveness be mutual, and may it all serve to honor you.

Surely, sin has led my relationship to this point, but I also know that you can bring us out, into a better and brighter future.

Thank you, Lord. Amen.

A Prayer for Introspection

Father,

Oh, how easy it is to fall into the trap of seeing how I have been wronged and not the wrongs I have committed. Even on my best days, when I have thought, reflected, and found some faults, I instinctively leave some out. I naturally focus on what others do to me and not what I do to them. Maybe this is human nature; maybe this will never completely change, but I do know that with your help, I can be better. I can practice better introspection. I can become a person who knows the ways in which I contribute to conflict.

Where I am doing such in my relationships now, I pray that you would help me to stop. Please, and thank you.

Amen.

A Prayer for Reconciliation

God,

I hate the feeling. The feeling when a relationship is falling apart, breaking at the seams. That feeling is especially poignant when I’m close to someone, and that’s exactly how I feel right now. The relationship doesn’t have to end, but conflict is preventing any new beginning.

Help us to reconcile, God. Please don’t let such a mutually meaningful and helpful relationship conclude. Everybody has their differences, and where there are differences, we can form an even better relationship. But first, we have to reconcile.

With you, Lord, I know we can. Please show us how. Give us the right timing, the right words, and the right motivations.

In Jesus’ Name, I pray. Amen.

A Prayer for Hope

Lord,

So long as you are a part of the equation, all things are possible. That goes for everything in my life, including my relationships. Especially my relationships. Whether things are great or bitter, Lord, you give me a reason to hope.

And so I hope right now. I hope for an end to the conflict. I hope for a resolution, for understanding. Lord, my hope is that not only do we grow closer to one another but that we grow closer to you in the process.

Thank you for being the God you are and showing me that with Christ, all things are possible.

Amen.

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/PixelsEffect

Aaron D’Anthony Brown is a freelance writer, hip-hop dance teacher, and visual artist, living in Virginia. He currently contributes work to iBelieve, Crosswalk, and supports various clients through the platform Upwork. He’s an outside-the-box thinker with a penchant for challenging the status quo. Check out his short story “Serenity.”

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August 14, 2023