Patience in Leadership Means Letting Things Unfold Naturally

Great ideas take time. It took more than 200 years for scientists to create vaccines. It took centuries of theory before space exploration and the invention of the internet. And millions of ideas are brewing today that you may not see come to fruition in your lifetime. So why do people expect leaders to make flawless, swift, and accurate decisions in minutes? True leadership requires patience, and part of that is learning to focus on the things that truly matter.  

However, patience in leadership is not just about organizational decisions. It’s about taking the time to let things unfold at their own pace. This includes how you feel about the direction your business is headed or the discomfort that comes with change. You never really know how it’s all going to unfold unless you get intimately familiar with the feelings of unease.  

Yes, change is unsettling

Asking clients to wait and see is often met with frustration. Your world moves swiftly and demands attention at every turn. As a leader, you’re used to being in control of what happens next and manipulating outcomes. That’s the job you signed up for. However, stepping back to make a decision or letting changes take place without trying to control them is where you will grow as a leader. It’s also where the most significant transformations happen within any business. 

But what about the anxious feeling? The one that keeps you up at night and begs you to take back the reins? Let it thrive. That feeling will not dissipate. It will not settle, sleep, or let you feel anything other than the power it holds. That’s because patience isn’t passive. It’s robust, anxious, and all the things that will cause you to second-guess yourself. However, patience is also a strength. That’s what I was referring to in my book, Reboot, when I wrote about staying with your discomfort until you reach that place where it becomes something else.  

How leaders can develop more patience 

You will pass through the depths of anxiousness and uncertainty if you sit with something long enough or if you allow patience to be your guide. On the other side is clarity and truth. However, before you can get there, there are some fundamental things to ask yourself. I recommend journaling, typing these questions out, writing them down on a dinner napkin, or even saying them out loud.  

Patience carries powerful energy. The best way to channel it is by working through these burning questions:  

• What am I really feeling? Now’s the time to write it all down—anxiety, uncertainty, dread, fear, excitement, or tension. Whatever it is that you are feeling, write it down. 
• What am I avoiding? You might be avoiding something by trying to take back control and not sitting with patience. What are you really trying to avoid? Maybe it’s an inevitable outcome you dread, or perhaps it’s a feeling you’d rather avoid. Be honest with yourself. 
• What’s the story I’m telling myself? In the words of Joan Didion, “We tell ourselves stories in order to live,” and that’s true in everything we do. We all have stories. What is the story you are telling yourself about the situation you’re unable to control right now? What is the narrative that is untrue but makes you feel better?  

There’s a light at the end of this uneasy and difficult tunnel. The more that you practice patience and the art of sitting with unease, the more insight you will gain. It won’t get easier, but it will become a habit, and that, in turn, will become your leadership truth.