Category: Family & Parenting

A good day these days is one during which I have tossed at least one garbage bag of “stuff” away (read: donated, recycled or re-homed). Our new, smaller home will not have the capacity to contain all of the things that, without great thought, we stowed away over the years.

It feels good, freeing, liberating to get rid of the “stuff.” 

The first pass through the “stuff” is easy. In our home the “one thing in, one thing out” rule quickly morphed into “one thing in, one thing stowed in a storage area.” Consequently, there is the pile of refuse that for some reason was never properly disposed of. Promises to wipe a computer’s hard drive went unkept. Now that we are properly incentivized, the computers will be wiped and begone, and good riddance.

Some decisions are easy. 

The decisions I am making are not really about the stuff

But, this isn’t about the “stuff.” Not really. It’s about forcing myself to reckon with what matters. Once the first layer is gone and I can more clearly see what lies beneath, I begin to cut closer to the bone. And, then the decisions become difficult. 

A pattern emerges: Furniture, even the nice stuff, does not inspire connection for me. Those decisions are purely utilitarian-do I like it and do we need it? But a soft cover book like, I Love You the Purplest or Goodnight Moon that I read to my boys so many nights feels impossible to discard. Maybe someday they will read to their children from the book I read to them. 

The jewelry presents its own issues

There is the jewelry from my parents’ home that I cleaned out years ago that has been gathering dust in a Ziploc bag in my closet. A necklace brings back memories of the person who wore it, memories of the day they bought it, of the way they looked in it.

But the piece is not my taste and it never will be. Do I melt it down for its cash value? 

It’s not a question of absolute value but of its value to me? I pause and wonder; might an outdated style of jewelry come back into fashion and be just the thing that would connect a daughter-in-law with her husband’s grandmother? Melting the piece down for its monetary value feels like the right answer. It also feels like the wrong answer.

Other pieces that do not inspire memories are easier to let go. 

The letters are another thing I need to decide on

I continue digging. 

I find an aerogramme from my late father to his late sister in which his writing strikes me anew. And an image of dad jumps out from the words on the page. I picture him sitting at his desk, Montblanc pen (his one splurge) in hand, drafting. I ponder his relationship with his sister. Perhaps this letter is the most revelatory and durable thing he could have left me.

As I read the letter and the memories flood in, something strikes me; I grew up in a very different era. Did I even know my father as a person, as an adult, as a brother? 

My much-adored father, now gone 25 years, describes me to his sister as an 8 year old “much given to female vanity.” Female vanity, Dad. Are you serious? Is vanity a uniquely female attribute? You simply could not have thought so.

Could an 8 year olds reaction to a gifted dress which made her twirl repeatedly in the mirror perhaps be called enthusiasm rather than vanity? I feel like I have spoilers and I want so much to let my dad know: The child who was “much given to female vanity” did not, in fact, turn out to be overly vain, just normally so. Might one of my three grown sons, perhaps the one who is named for my father but never had the chance to meet him, enjoy getting to know his grandfather through his writing. I stuff the letter back in a drawer; it’s definitely a keeper. 

This process forces me to decide what really matters

This whole process forces me to sift through the detritus of my life and decide what is worthy of keeping and what not. And in a larger sense-what is now and what will continue to be important to me or to my children? It also forces me to grapple with what of my own life my children might find worthy of keeping one day. 

The process reminds me of the rhetorical question in Hamilton, “Who will tell your story?” And as an extension of that question, the natural follow up-Which of the items I’m sifting through now will aid in that telling? 

The memories are ours to keep, if not the things

At dinner the other night, my friend reminded my adult children who struggle with letting go that we never have to let the memories go; they are ours to keep. I remind myself of that too. But some of the things bring the memories flooding back. And when the things are gone will the memories be harder to access? Perhaps even impossible to access. 

Someday, when I am consigned to the dustbin of history, which of my things will remain? And who will sift through them one day and wonder about the person who used them, about the person who made a decision that these were the things to be saved. These turn out to be hard decisions; harder than I thought they would be. 

More Great Reading:

Once My Nest Emptied, I Just Started to Declutter EVERYTHING

Throughout the years I’ve posted so many, many, many, many times about the bus stop book stop, the little free library that I go to get books and return books I no longer want. But for years I’ve been traveling, first by bus, and now by car, to a place that is out of my way, but it has a bunch of books (especially in English) and it is a great place to exchange my books. But because it was so out of my way I usually waited until I had a really large stack that was taking up room in my bedroom, and then come home with another stack. This was a pain. But free books, yay!

For so long, I’ve wished for there to be a little free library in my town, but didn’t know how to go about starting one nor did I have the funds to start one on my own. When a local English speaker joined the town government, I asked her if we could arrange one of these and she said we could, but nothing happened, and by now she no longer works there.

I went to the hardware store and bought some reinforced metal brackets of different sizes. Even if I attached the bottom of the bookshelf, I needed something to make sure it would be a rectangle with right angles, because it wanted very much to be just a parallelogram that tilted to the side. So I used larger reinforced L brackets to attach the bottom of the bookshelf, with the reinforced right angles of the brackets ensuring that the bookshelf itself would be with all right angles and completely upright and not leaning to the side. I then used less big but also reinforced L brackets on each of the 4 corners of each shelf in the bookcase, also to keep the shelves strong (one already had broken off and one was wobbly) but also to add even more support to make sure that every part of the bookshelf was all right angles. 

Then I needed to reattach the back of the bookshelf with a bunch of little nails. My daughter wanted to help with that.

It wasn’t very physically challenging theoretically to rebuild the bookshelf, but it was a little challenging to figure out how to position the different parts of the bookshelf when I was trying to screw in the brackets when it wasn’t currently with right angles, but I got it. I spent maybe a total of 2 hours or less fixing the bookshelf (and that includes the time I needed to let the battery for my drill charge when it ran out of juice when I nearly finished).

Each of the larger brackets cost me $1.40 and the smaller ones cost $0.57 cents each. I used 5 of the larger and 23 of the smaller ones. So that was about $20 for all the brackets and another $5 for all the screws and nails. Not bad.

I bought some waterproofing sealant to put on in the winter. I didn’t do it yet because I wanted to set it up already and get it out of my house. But again, it isn’t urgent since the summer is almost here. 

I also bought a thick plastic tablecloth and velcro. I will have the tablecloth rolled up at the top of the bookshelf in the winter and unroll it and velcro the corners down to stop it from blowing around in the rainy wind. But it might not be needed because it is in the direction that is away from where the wind blows. I’ll put this up once I waterproof it. 

The equipment to waterproof it cost me another $30.

I made a sign on it in English and the local language. It says: 

Little Free Library.
Leave books you no longer want. Take books that look good. No need to return if you like a book.
No religious books or school books. No broken books. Any language welcome.
Under camera surveillance. 

I put the bookshelf at the bottom of my stairs that lead out of my yard, against the retaining wall of my front yard. My upstairs neighbors have a surveillance camera that looks out directly over this area since this is where he parks his motorcycle, so it works to announce the cameras there, because unfortunately we have a vandalism issue with teenagers in my neighborhood, and hopefully this will keep the library in good condition.

I had posted in my local WhatsApp group about this initiative and people were really excited about it (at least in the English speaking community… but honestly those are the books I care more about anyhow) and I have people who already donated some books that I picked up tonight and put on the shelf. I have more local people who told me they’ll bring books over. And tomorrow I am heading to the city with my car and I’ll be going to pick up more donations for the library. 

So now it isn’t full, but there is a shelf full of books in a few different genres on a variety of different subjects. 

I can’t wait for this project to take off. I know it’ll do great.

Do you have one of these little free libraries in your community? How often do you get from or put books there? If you don’t have one, does this seem like a project you’d start?

Photo and story by Louise Kinross

Michelle Luis (above) loves to write and sing her own songs. It was during recess when she was “coming up with beats to write” in her head, that a girl from another class began bullying her.

“My friends would be playing sports, and since my balance isn’t 100 per cent, I would be walking in the yard writing music,” says Michelle, now 11, who has cerebral palsy and wears braces.

The bully “would find me and pick on me. She made me feel like I wasn’t worth being in the world because of things she said about my disability. It made me sad and upset. You knock yourself down because of the words the other person is saying.”

It began in Grade 1, and it continued until Grade 4. The bully always targeted Michelle when she was alone.

“I started to pretend I was sick so I wouldn’t have to go to school,” Michelle says. “At one point my mom realized something was wrong and asked me and that’s when I told her.”

Michelle’s mom went to speak with the school principal. “I took books about cerebral palsy for teachers to educate students about,” Daniela Luis says. “The students responded very well to the resources and asked many questions to the teachers.”

Michelle says the bullying stopped “because everyone was on my side, and no one was on her side.”

Michelle gave a talk to her class to explain her disability and used an All About Me book she had made while at the Bloorview School. “After that kids were kind of like okay, she’s different, but then as time went by, they started seeing me as a normal person.”  

A bully repeatedly targets and intimidates another child. It could be saying mean things, pushing or kicking, yelling in a child’s face, telling secrets or spreading rumours, not allowing a child to play, or telling other kids not to be friends with someone. Social media has provided a new platform for this aggression.

Michelle has advice for kids who face bullying because of their disability.

“Do your best to stand up for yourself and tell the bully about your differences so they will understand better,” Michelle says. “If they don’t stop, tell a trusted adult who can help you.”

Studies show children with a variety of disabilities are more likely to be bullied than nondisabled peers. This 2024 review and analysis of 212 studies in The Lancet found youth aged four to 17 with conditions like autism, ADHD or intellectual disability, or a psychiatric diagnosis, were almost three times as likely to be victims at school. They were also more likely to be perpetrators, or both perpetrators and victims.

“Bullying is a common form of violence among children and adolescents that has been recognized as a major public health concern and is considered one of the most robust preventable risk factors for mental disorders,” The Lancet authors write. 

The impact of bullying on children’s mental health “is huge,” says Carly McMorris, a clinical psychologist and associate professor at The Enhance Lab at the University of Calgary. For example, “in autistic kiddos we know they are at super high risk for mental health [problems] like anxiety, depression, and suicidality.”

Children may not tell their parents they’re being victimized. “Because of their social challenges, children on the autism spectrum may not be clear about what is a typical friendship and what is not acceptable,” Carly says. “Also, often the bully tells the child not to tell anyone, or it will get worse.” Some disabled children don’t have the language to recount what happened.

“Part of the work we do is about empowering our kids, especially those with intellectual disabilities, to understand consent and bullying and boundaries and how to speak up around victimization,” Carly says. “We need to teach about what is a friendship and understanding what is okay and what is not.”

Changes in a child’s behaviour are the most common signs of bullying,” Carly says. “Being sick in the morning, not wanting to go to school, or being more socially isolated or irritable,” are examples. Ask your child direct questions, she suggests, like “Is someone being mean to you at school?“ rather than a generic “How was your day?”

PREVnet, a Canadian network of researchers and organizations dedicated to bullying and violence prevention, has some great resources for kids and parents.

This Facts and Solutions page is useful, emphasizing that children need to know it’s not their fault and it’s an adult’s job to make the bullying stop. The child, peers, and parents, may have to tell multiple authority figures to put an end to it.

In addition to reaching out to adults for help, Michelle encourages kids to “do something you love that will take your mind off it.” For Michelle, that was music. “Writing a song will always be a way for me to cope with what happened. Remind yourself that you have people that surround you with love, and you have lots of strengths that make you who you are.”

Michelle was interviewed by CBC about her participation in The Superhero Project, a non-profit that interviews kids with disabilities and illnesses about their strengths, then has artists design a poster depicting them as a superhero. You can listen to Michelle’s song about standing up to bullies called ‘I’m just like you.’

Like this content? Sign up for our monthly BLOOM e-letter, follow @LouiseKinross on Twitter, or watch our A Family Like Mine video series.

Modern women entrepreneurs are more empowered and capable of running a business than ever. However, the entire endeavor can still be overwhelming and intimidating, particularly for first-time business owners. If you plan to launch your own small business, here are six valuable tips to help you get started.

Assess your finances

No matter the size, starting a business can be financially challenging. Before jumping into the business wagon, you must first evaluate if you’re in a great financial position to do so. Determine if you have enough capital or access to reliable financial sources. Whether you plan to utilize your hard-earned savings, take a $500 cash advance without a credit check, secure a loan, or ask for financial assistance from family and friends, you must ensure that you are financially capable of starting a business.

Devise a plan

A strong business plan is essential when starting a business, as it will help you stay focused and achieve success. Create a business plan that outlines your goals, target market, and marketing strategy. If launching a business from scratch seems daunting, consider acquiring an existing business or collaborating with an established brand or with someone who shares your vision.

Monetize your interests

One effective and easiest way to stay motivated is to start a business you feel intensely passionate about. Many successful business ventures were once passion projects or side hustles before they became full-time businesses. Choose a business that aligns with your passion and interests. However, make sure to conduct market research to check if your potential business endeavor will be viable in the long run.

Find a mentor

If you have no experience running a business, it is best if you seek guidance from someone established in the industry. A mentor can help you avoid common entrepreneurship mistakes and provide you with valuable advice. Attending networking conferences, participating in industry-specific events, checking online platforms, leveraging social media, and looking into your own social and business network are some of the ways to find a credible and competent business mentor.

Diversify your network

Developing a diverse network of fruitful contacts is integral to achieving business success. As a new entrepreneur, you must focus on fostering valuable and healthy relationships with individuals who can help grow your business. These connections can also offer you different perspectives and lucrative opportunities that you previously did not have access to.

Invest in marketing

Marketing can help you get your small business off the ground. Many consumers patronize businesses that they can relate to or which they personally believe in. As a woman entrepreneur, consider being the face of your brand and devise a marketing plan that will resonate with your intended audience. Utilize all relevant social media platforms, invest in developing an efficient and user-friendly website, and exhaust all available marketing tools at your disposal.

Endnote

Starting a business can be challenging, but with dedication, the right mindset, a positive attitude, and a strong support community, you can elevate your business to higher grounds and achieve success.

Engagement rings… ever since De Beers extremely successful marketing campaign that “Diamonds are forever”, diamond engagement rings have been the expected norm when couples commit to spending their lives together. But diamond rings can be very costly. Some money conscious people today choose to forgo the diamond ring entirely, choose another stone, or even go for a cubic zirconium ring, others prefer a real diamond ring, in which case, you’d want to research how to best keep the costs down.

When it comes to diamonds, the principal factors are the four C’s—carat, clarity, color, and cut—that determine the stone’s quality and value. If choosing a slightly lower carat weight or compromising on inclusions or color is an option, it can result in a very significant price reduction. It is essential to look at diamonds in reality or from a trustworthy online seller, where you can study the visual impact of these variations for yourself. Frequently, a diamond with minor blemishes or a little warmer color can be equally beautiful as a perfect one, but only as long as it is a well-cut stone, which would maximize its brilliance.

Selective Shopping: When and Where to Shop

Once you know the main price factors of an engagement ring, it’s time to look around and find the most cost-effective ring purchasing options. Buying an engagement ring online is usually cheaper because online sellers typically have lower maintenance costs than traditional physical stores. Websites like Diamonds on Richmond have covered you with a vast choice of stunning engagement rings, from affordable to top-of-the-range, allowing you to compare designs and settings at your own pace.

Another chance for affordable luxury is to consider vintage or pre-owned rings. Such items can be purchased for less money than new ones. Besides, they often tell a story. They also feature a unique style that has its essence and is eternal, thus attracting those in search of something outstanding and telling a story.

Conclusion

It doesn’t have to be a compromise between price and luxury anymore when you choose a ring for engagement. This can be achieved by knowing which parts of an engagement ring hold value, shopping strategically, and exploring all the available options. With that, you will find a sparkling ring that is charming, elegant, and affordable.

Remember that the value of an engagement ring is not the only important factor; it represents the love and commitment it represents. Proper strategy is the key to acquiring a luxurious but affordable article that will guarantee your engagement starts on a happy and loving note from the beginning.

College move-in day is approaching, and the best way to prepare is to be ready. Every school has its own rules and traditions surrounding move-in day, and you will soon learn what those are. But some things are universal.

So, whether your whole family is going or just your teen is moving into a dorm or apartment, there are 11 things that thousands of experienced Grown and Flown parents told us were THE essential items they felt they needed for this intense and highly emotional day. 

Note: We are a reader-supported site and receive compensation from purchases made through the links in this post. 

Top 11 things to bring to college move-in day

1. Magna Cart Four Wheel Folding Platform Cart (Target)

A platform cart or a dolly was mentioned repeatedly — they’re enormously helpful for getting your stuff where it needs to go. This will make college move-in day go so much more smoothly.

2. Accell Surge Protector (Amazon)

You can never have enough power in a dorm room, and many colleges do not allow extension cords. This surge protector has a 6-foot cord, 6 outlets, and 2 USB ports.

3. WOOZOO Fan (Amazon)

August can be sweltering, and many dorms are not air-conditioned. Bring a fan and set it up first to keep all of you a little cooler during the move-in. WOOZOO fans have become very popular and now come in many pretty colors and a remote control.

4. Apollo Tool Set (Amazon)

The most recommended tools were a screwdriver, tape measure, hammer, scissors, rubber mallet, and duct tape. Leave a set like this for your student who will use it moving in and out of dorms and apartments over the next four years…and beyond.

5. First Aid Kit (Amazon)

We recommend compiling your personalized kit with all the first aid and cough/cold medicines your family prefers. But if you want to be covered with the basics, getting a set this like will do the trick.

6. Wundermax Door Stopper (Amazon)

As soon as you get to the room, use one of these to prop the door open, and you will make your life much easier. This door stopper comes with a holder that can be attached with velcro to the back of the door, so the doorstop won’t get lost under a pile of dirty clothes (theoretically).

7. Water bottles and snacks

Something to drink and nibble on will be handy when you’re hot and tired.

BTW, since college students need water bottles, think about packing a new Hydro Flask water bottle that offers a wide selection of styles and sizes perfect for your students. For long days on campus, studying at the library, sports practice, bike rides, workouts, hiking, or walking to class, Hydro Flask water bottles are excellent for your teen — keeping drinks cold or hot for the whole day.

8. Command Hooks and Strips (Amazon)

Command strips and hooks for “hanging” things on walls are very popular; they peel off easily without ruining the walls. Note: Check the “residence life” section of the college website to see if these are allowed.

9. Cleaning supplies

Fill a bucket with cleaning supplies such as Clorox wipes, trash bags, and shelf liners because you may want to wipe everything down.

10. Paper and Pen/Sharpie (Amazon)

You will probably have some of this stuff with you for your student but keep a pen handy because you may need to make notes or fill out forms. A Sharpie will come in handy.

11. Change of clothing

You will invariably get hot and sweaty, so it might be nice to take a backpack with a change of clothing for everyone or at least a fresh t-shirt.

You will forget something, of course

Everyone forgets something. Whatever you’ve forgotten, don’t panic because, luckily, we live in a time when you can get anything online and get it shipped to your student.

Finally…The most popular answer, aside from those listed above and tissues, alcohol, and tranquilizers, was to bring your smile, sense of humor, and patience. Bring an overabundance of patience because you’ll need it. And follow your student’s lead — it’s not your room; it’s theirs.

You are there to help but not to dictate. College move-in day can be very long, hot, and exhausting. However difficult the day is, it’s also tremendously exciting. Heed the crowd’s wisdom and bring your smile and ability to let go, and it might just be a day you all remember fondly.

When the move-in is complete-it’s time to walk away, however cranky everyone got during the move. When you leave your child, tell them you love them, you’re proud of them, and assure them that you will be fine, and so will they.

When your teen turns 18, there are some legal forms you will want to have in place. Don’t forget to add these legal forms to your list of what should be done before you head out for campus. Click here to learn more or on this link to go directly to the forms you need. 

More Great Reading: 

17 Items to Check Off Your List Before Your Teen Leaves for College

6 Reasons Why Moms Cry When They Leave Their Kids at College

Gardens for many are sanctuaries and gardening is a hobby that connects us to nature and to other living things. In a fast-paced world where stress and anxiety seem ever-present, finding moments of tranquility and serenity can be a challenge. One powerful way to create a personal sanctuary and reconnect with your inner self is by cultivating a spiritual garden. A spiritual garden is not just an ordinary patch of greenery; it is a carefully designed space that is intended to nourish your soul, calm your mind, and uplift your spirit. In this blog post, we will explore the art of creating a spiritual garden and how you can harness its transformative energy to enhance your well-being.

Designing Your Spiritual Garden

The first step in creating a spiritual garden is to carefully plan its design. Consider the layout, color scheme, and plants that will be incorporated into the space. Choose elements that resonate with you on a deep level and evoke a sense of peace and harmony. Whether you prefer a zen-inspired minimalistic design or a lush, vibrant garden filled with flowers, the key is to create a space that reflects your unique spiritual journey.

Choosing Sacred Plants

Plants play a central role in a spiritual garden, as they are believed to carry healing energy and symbolic meanings. Consider incorporating sacred plants such as lavender for calmness, sage for cleansing, and rosemary for protection. Research the spiritual properties of different plants and select those that resonate with your intentions for the garden. Remember to care for your plants with love and intention, as your energy will be infused into the garden through your interactions with them.

Creating Sacred Spaces

In addition to plants, consider creating sacred spaces within your garden that are dedicated to spiritual practices such as meditation, yoga, or prayer. Install a comfortable seating area where you can sit and reflect, place a small altar with meaningful objects, or design a labyrinth for walking meditation. These sacred spaces will serve as focal points for your spiritual practices and provide a sense of sanctuary within the garden.

Harnessing the Power of Ritual

Rituals are an integral part of using a spiritual garden to deepen your connection with the divine and cultivate inner peace. Create daily or weekly rituals that involve tending to your garden, such as watering the plants mindfully, harvesting herbs for tea, or performing a grounding meditation outdoors. By infusing your garden activities with intention and mindfulness, you will amplify the spiritual energy of the space and strengthen your bond with nature.

Embracing the Seasons

Just as nature cycles through the seasons of growth, fruition, and dormancy, so too should your spiritual garden reflect these natural rhythms. Embrace the changing seasons by adapting your garden to the cycles of nature. Plant seasonal flowers, adjust your rituals to align with the solstices and equinoxes, and take time to observe the changes in your garden throughout the year. By attuning yourself to the Earth’s cycles, you will deepen your connection to the natural world and find greater peace within yourself.

Inviting Divine Guidance

Finally, remember that a spiritual garden is not just a physical space but a portal to the divine. Invite guidance from your spirit guides, angels, ancestors, or any other spiritual beings that resonate with you. Set intentions for your garden, pray for guidance, and remain open to receiving messages and insights as you spend time in the space. Trust that your spiritual garden is a sacred oasis where you can commune with the divine and receive the wisdom and support you need on your spiritual journey.

In conclusion, creating a spiritual garden is a powerful way to nurture your spiritual growth, cultivate inner peace, and deepen your connection with the natural world. By designing a space that is infused with intention, love, and mindfulness, you can transform your garden into a sanctuary that uplifts your spirit and nourishes your soul. Embrace the journey of creating and tending to your spiritual garden, and allow its beauty and magic to guide you on your path to spiritual awakening.

When someone is dealing with mental health issues like anxiety, it can be overwhelming, and people may want to do anything to stop their suffering. While there are very good things that work for anxiety, such as therapy and psychiatric medication, quite a few people “self medicate” with the following for their issues which can be quite problematic in both the short and long run. If you are dealing with mental health issues, these are some things you should be extra careful with, possibly even avoiding them entirely, to make sure you don’t abuse these to feel better.

Often, those who are suffering from substance abuse start by looking for a way to self-medicate. Many suffer from mental health concerns like anxiety and look for ways to reduce their anxiety. This can turn into an addiction over time and end up having serious negative consequences.

Opiates and Opioids

Opioids and opiates are commonly prescribed to help with pain, but the effects they can have can also help with anxiety. However, taking them for an off-label purpose and trying to use them to self-medicate for anxiety can lead to an addiction, as these medications are incredibly addictive. Those who are addicted to opioids may want to look into Tricare approved drug rehab centers to get help for the addiction and to learn better ways to handle the anxiety.

Alcohol

Alcohol is a common choice for those who want to avoid being anxious in social situations. Unfortunately, by turning to alcohol frequently to control the negative emotions associated with anxiety, it’s possible to end up drinking too frequently. This can then turn into an addiction, and it can be more challenging to quit drinking.

Marijuana

Marijuana is commonly seen as a safe way to self-medicate mental health concerns like anxiety, but it isn’t without risks. Studies have shown that CBD can help with anxiety, leading many people to believe marijuana is a good choice. Though CBD can help, there are risks of using THC and of self-medicating with marijuana. Instead of using marijuana, it’s better to look into THC-free alternatives with a professional.

Stimulants

Stimulants can impact those with anxiety and help reduce symptoms, so they are often used by those who want to self-medicate. Caffeine is a stimulant that’s often abused because it’s easily available and the impact can be quick, but it can be dangerous to consume too much caffeine at once. Turning to other stimulants like amphetamines, however, can be incredibly risky and lead to addiction.

ADHD Medications

There are numerous ADHD medications, and some of them may help with anxiety. Taking them without a prescription, though, can be dangerous. It is possible to become addicted to these medications, especially when they aren’t taken under medical supervision, and there can be health complications as a result.

Nicotine

Nicotine is often used by individuals who suffer from anxiety. As it is a highly addictive substance, it can be challenging for someone to stop using nicotine, even if they start to see negative health impacts as a result. Many who use nicotine will find it’s difficult to stop using it without professional help, even though it’s not commonly thought of as a substance that can be abused.

Food

Food is something that’s required to survive, but it is possible to become addicted to overeating, especially if it’s done to help with mental health concerns like anxiety. Overeating can lead to many health complications and it can be challenging to change habits to live a healthier lifestyle for someone who uses food to self-medicate.

Dealing with anxiety is possible without turning to substances, but it may require some work and speaking with professionals. Instead of turning to these or other substances, look into ways to handle the anxiety in a healthy way. If you have used substances like these to deal with your anxiety, look into the help that’s available to recover from the addiction as you work on controlling your anxiety using healthier methods.

If you’re in need of updating pretty much any room in your home, you’re in luck. Wayfair is having its massive annual Way Day Sale featuring up to 80% off rugs, outdoor furniture, home decor, and so much more! We’ve also spotted great deals on cookware (like this KitchenAid stand mixer) and storage and small-space furniture that would be great for dorm rooms or first apartments! 

Plus, the Way Day sale also includes all of Wayfair’s brands, including AllModern, Joss & Main, and Birch Lane, which have some stylish, modern indoor and outdoor furniture on sale. We’ve looked through the top deals and included some of the most popular items on the Wayfair site, but since furniture and personal style can be so personal, we recommend sifting through the sale yourself as well! 

The sale only runs from Saturday, May 4 to Monday, May 6, so shop them while they’re still available! 

Note: We are a reader-supported site and may receive compensation from purchases made through these links.

Our 5 Favorite Way Day Deals

1. Lark Manor Thurleigh Round Sherpa Ottoman

We love storage ottomans as some sneaky dorm room storage, and this sherpa option is as cute as it is functional. It doubles as a seat for guests and they can stuff blankets or extra sheets inside.

2. Nine Stars Steel Motion Sensor Trash Can

Upgrade your current trash can with this motion sensor option. It means you’ll never have to tough the gross lid again, and it’s 41% off right now.

3. 17 Stories Dolbeare Abstract Gray Area Rug

A rug in a college dorm room can immediately make it feel more homey. This marbled rug adds a pop of color while tying a living area together. It comes in several sizes, but we recommend the 5’ by 7’ size to best fit a dorm room

4. Sand & Stable Solid Wood Shoe Rack

You can never have too much shoe storage! This wooden rack is stylish and can hold up to 18 pairs of shoes—and the top rack could even be used to house decorations or a bowl to hold keys. It’s great for a first college apartment or if you need more shoe storage.

5. Alwyn Home Quilted Fitted Mattress Pad

A mattress pad is essential for college (you don’t know who’s slept on that mattress before). This quilted one will add some extra fluff and comfort to a dorm room mattress and it’s 54% off right now!

Other Great Way Day Home and Dorm Deals We Love

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It has been over 3 years since I got diagnosed with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (my first post about it was here, in May of 2021) and in that time, I’ve been to the number one EDS specialist in my country (I’ll call her Dr G), learned so much more about my body and how to help it, and pieced together so many pieces of my life that I never would have connected before this. And most importantly, figured out ways to actually help myself. Some of this will be a repeat of what I’ve written in my 2022 post about my life with EDS, but most of it will be new info, so you might want to read back on that post.

Since May is Ehlers Danlos Syndrome Awareness Month this is the perfect time for me to do a follow up post on the topic, that I’d wanted to write ever since I saw the EDS specialist. There will be part 2, what the puzzle pieces were in my life that finally fell into place once I saw the specialist.

When I first suspected I had EDS, I found out about the only specialist in my country with EDS, Dr G, and how impossible it was to get an appointment with her. She had a long waiting list, and you could only get on the waiting list with her once you already had a diagnosis (or something like that) and she’d decide if she would take you on as a client. And even then, it was really hard to get in touch with her. I had 2 orthopedists give me an official diagnosis and then I tried to make an appointment with her and then found out that she no longer worked at the hospital where she used to see patients, and they had no further information to give about how to reach her to make an appointment.

I made a Facebook group for mostly local people with EDS, and someone there knew of a private clinic where Dr G saw patients. It wasn’t coverable by insurance… and it cost $575. I honestly wouldn’t have bothered to go to her, because I just figured it wasn’t worth the money since I already knew about EDS, already had a good PT to help me, etc… 

As I mentioned in my previous post, to get a diagnosis of hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, there’s a checklist you need to fit. You need Criterion 1, 2, and 3 to get a diagnosis of hEDS, with 1 being a test of hypermobility in joints, 3 being ruling out other potential causes, and 2 having 3 parts (A, B, and C) and you need to meet 2 of them. For A you need to have 5/12 criteria, which my kids at this stage in their life don’t meet, and B is having an immediate family member with EDS, which all my kids do, and C is chronic pain in your joints or frequent dislocations or subluxations.

My youngest daughter, Rose, 100% meets the criteria for hypermobile EDS, and it helps me figure out how to help her (playing around with joints to try to get them back into place when she starts screaming in pain out of the blue). 

My older daughter, Anneleise, though, is more complicated. She doesn’t meet the criteria for hEDS because her joints aren’t particularly hypermobile, according to both my physical therapist and 2 rheumatologists we brought her to. So despite the chronic pain and an immediate family member with EDS, she doesn’t have hypermobile EDS. We’ve tried to figure out the cause of her pain, with many different appointments, and so far got nowhere. 

I decided to go ahead and pay that money to go to the EDS specialist, because I knew that I’d only be able to get genetic testing to determine what type of EDS I have if I went to Dr G. When you fit the diagnostic criteria for hEDS, you only officially get the diagnosis for hEDS once you genetically test for the other ones and don’t come out positive for that, since other types can also cause hypermobility. They haven’t found the gene or genes yet that cause hypermobile EDS but they know the genes that cause the other ones. If I got genetically tested and I came out positive for some other EDS type, then that would be the cause of my daughter’s chronic joint pain, even without hypermobility.

1. Orthodics.
2. Go to the hypermobility rehabilitation clinic at the hospital where she used to work and get the following:
1. Physical therapy from a PT that knows hypermobility well, to give me a treatment program to strengthen my muscles and improve proprioception, as well as manual physical therapy.
2. Hydrotherapy from a physical therapist who is familiar with hypermobility, who can build me a program that I can do on my own time on my 3-4 times a week in the pool.
3. OT to help my stability.
4. CBT for pain.
3. Go to a maxillofacial (face, jaw, and mouth) specialist who is familiar with symptoms of soft tissue disorders.
4. Schroth style PT for my kyphosis and lumbar lordosis (different improper curvatures of the spine).
5. Regular rheumatologist appointments.
6. Yearly gastro appointments to make sure I’m not developing any of the more problematic stomach issues associated with EDS (on top of the ones I already have, IBS and reflux).
7. Pelvic floor PT.
8. Seeing a specific eye specialist familiar with EDS to check for cataracts and a whole bunch of other symptoms that can be caused by it.
9. Seeing a cardiologist to have an Echo to check for a bunch of features associated with EDS.
10. Bone density test.
11. Go to a geneticist to test for which type of EDS or soft tissue disorders I have (she specifically suspects classic EDS). Get genetic testing for my kids as well.
12. Go to a dysautonomia specialist.

Yup. That was quite a long list of things to do. And nope, it has been over a year and I haven’t made my way through the whole thing.

So for the first list:

As for the list of medical referrals…

Published: May 3, 2024 | Last Updated on: May 3, 2024
| by Hema

Welcome to our flavorful culinary adventure! Today, we’re diving into the world of delightful snacks with a twist that’s sure to captivate both young and old taste buds alike. Say hello to our irresistible Mint Makhana recipe!

Makhana, also known as fox nuts or lotus seeds, takes center stage in this recipe, boasting a crunchy texture and mild flavor that serves as the perfect canvas for our aromatic mint infusion. With just a handful of simple ingredients and a burst of refreshing mint leaves, we’re about to transform these humble morsels into a snack-time sensation.

Whether you’re looking for a wholesome treat for your little ones or a guilt-free indulgence for yourself, this Mint Makhana recipe promises to deliver a burst of flavor and crunch in every bite. So, roll up your sleeves, gather your ingredients, and let’s embark on a journey of taste and texture that’s as delightful to make as it is to devour!

Crunchy, flavorful, and oh-so-delicious – that’s what our Mint Makhana recipe brings to the table! If you’re on the lookout for a kid-friendly snack that’s not just tasty but also easy to make, you’ve landed on the right page. Makhana, also known as fox nuts or lotus seeds, takes center stage in this recipe, paired with a burst of freshness from mint leaves and a hint of tanginess from lemon juice. It’s a delightful treat that will have both kids and adults reaching for more. So, gather your little chefs and let’s dive into the world of aromatic spices and wholesome munchies with our Mint Makhana adventure!

Health Benefits of Makhana

Makhana, also known as fox nuts or lotus seeds, offers several health benefits for kids, making it a nutritious addition to their diet. Here are some of the key health benefits of makhana for children:

1. Rich in Protein: Makhana is a good source of protein, which is essential for children’s growth and development. Protein helps in building and repairing tissues, supporting muscle growth, and boosting overall health.
2. Low in Calories: Makhana is low in calories and fat, making it a healthy snack option for kids. It provides energy without contributing to excessive calorie intake, making it suitable for weight management.
3. High in Antioxidants: Makhana is rich in antioxidants like flavonoids and phenolic compounds. These antioxidants help in neutralizing harmful free radicals in the body, reducing oxidative stress, and promoting overall well-being.
4. Good Source of Minerals: Makhana contains essential minerals such as magnesium, phosphorus, potassium, and iron. These minerals play crucial roles in maintaining bone health, regulating blood pressure, supporting nerve function, and preventing anemia.
5. Digestive Benefits: Makhana is easy to digest and is often recommended for children with digestive issues. It contains dietary fiber, which aids in smooth digestion, prevents constipation, and promotes a healthy digestive system.
6. Gluten-Free and Allergy-Friendly: Makhana is naturally gluten-free, making it a safe and nutritious snack option for children with gluten intolerance or celiac disease. It is also hypoallergenic, making it less likely to cause allergic reactions compared to other snacks.
7. Brain Health: Makhana is a good source of vitamins like B-complex vitamins (thiamine, riboflavin, niacin) and vitamin E, which are important for brain health, cognitive function, and nervous system support in growing children.

Incorporating makhana into your child’s diet as a snack or adding it to meals can provide these health benefits while offering a tasty and crunchy treat that kids are sure to enjoy.

Mint Makhana Recipe

Ingredients

• 2 cups makhana (fox nuts or lotus seeds)
• 2 tablespoons ghee (clarified butter) or butter
• 1 teaspoon cumin seeds
• 1/2 teaspoon turmeric powder
• 1/2 teaspoon chaat masala (optional)
• Salt to taste
• Fresh mint leaves (a handful), finely chopped
• 1 tablespoon lemon juice

Method

• Heat a large pan or skillet over medium heat.
• Add ghee or butter to the pan and let it melt.
• Add the makhana to the pan and roast them for about 5-7 minutes until they become crispy. Keep stirring to ensure they cook evenly.
• Once the makhana are crispy, sprinkle salt, turmeric powder, and cumin seeds over them.
• Mix well to coat the makhana evenly with the spices. Cook for another 2-3 minutes.
• Turn off the heat and add the finely chopped fresh mint leaves to the pan.
• Squeeze the lemon juice over the makhana.
• Toss everything together gently to combine the mint flavor with the makhana.
• Let the makhana cool down a bit before serving.
• Serve the Mint Makhana as a crunchy and flavorful snack for kids to enjoy!

As we wrap up our exploration of the health benefits of makhana for kids, it’s clear that this humble snack packs a powerful nutritional punch. From being a rich source of protein and essential minerals to offering digestive benefits and supporting brain health, makhana checks all the boxes for a wholesome addition to children’s diets.

What makes makhana even more appealing is its versatility. Whether roasted with spices for a crunchy snack, added to curries and desserts for a nutritious twist, or simply enjoyed on its own, makhana offers a wide range of options for incorporating it into meals and snacks for kids.

As parents and caregivers, ensuring that our children receive the right balance of nutrients is paramount for their growth, development, and overall well-being. With its numerous health benefits and kid-friendly appeal, mint makhana stands out as a nutritious snack choice that both kids and adults can enjoy guilt-free.

So, the next time you’re looking for a wholesome and delicious snack option for your little ones, consider reaching for a bowl of crunchy mint makhana. Your kids’ taste buds and health will thank you for it!

Frequently Asked Questions

Ingredients

• 2 cups 2 cups makhana (fox nuts or lotus seeds)
• 2 tbsp Ghee (Clarified Butter)
• 1 tsp Cumin seeds
• 1/2 tsp Turmeric powder
• 1/2 tsp Chaat masala optional
• Salt to taste
• A handful Fresh mint leaves finely chopped
• 1 tbsp Lemon juice

Instructions

• Heat a large pan or skillet over medium heat.

• Add ghee or butter to the pan and let it melt. Add the makhana to the pan and roast them for about 5-7 minutes until they become crispy.

• Keep stirring to ensure they cook evenly. Once the makhana are crispy, sprinkle salt, turmeric powder, and cumin seeds over them.

• Mix well to coat the makhana evenly with the spices. Cook for another 2-3 minutes.

• Turn off the heat and add the finely chopped fresh mint leaves to the pan.

• Squeeze the lemon juice over the makhana. Toss everything together gently to combine the mint flavor with the makhana.

• Serve the Mint Makhana as a crunchy and flavorful snack for kids to enjoy.