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Category: Family & Parenting

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  • Former College President On Choosing a Major: Avoid This Big Mistake

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    December brings talk of college football playoffs and the start of basketball season. The Thanksgiving holiday might have included a visit home from your college student, and that can be a terrific family time. With or without a visit, there will be lots to talk about, including decisions about second semester (quarter) classes.

    Selecting a college major can cause anxiety in students…and their parents. (Shutterstock: insta_photos)

    Some students, especially sophomores, are beginning to zero-in on a major. Though these academic choices don’t generate college-sports-level media coverage, they’ll have a much more significant effect on your student’s current and future life than the question of who wins the next big game.

    Selecting a major can create anxiety for students and their parents

    When students begin thinking seriously about selecting a major – or even just their next-term schedule – parents can become anxious. Understandably, they may worry that selecting the “wrong” classes or course of studies will diminish their child’s future job prospects, driving down the expected “return on investment” for a college education that they may be struggling to pay for.

    First-year parents, who most likely were heavily involved in their student’s academic choices during high school, can also feel perplexed about their new role in their college-student’s life. (How much involvement is too much?) And these challenges can be even more pronounced for parents who did not attend college themselves.

    Thoughts on selecting a major from former college president

    Let me offer some thoughts about all this, in hopes of lowering the anxiety level and pointing toward helpful things college parents can do.

    Let’s begin with a comment that might sound familiar. Not too long ago, venture capitalist Katherine Boyle tweeted:

    The decline in liberal arts degrees bodes well for society on almost every dimension. College students now know that majoring in Book Club won’t get you a great job. This is progress.

    Katherine Boyle

    Her observation threw fuel on an already fierce debate about the value of studying the liberal arts rather than, say, computer science, business, or other academic areas often regarded as more “practical.”

    As the president of a national liberal arts college from 2003 to 2020 (and a philosophy professor for fifteen years, earlier in my career), I encountered similar sentiments many times. But this discussion seems to grow more intense every year, as each new undergraduate cohort faces ever-greater pressures to realize the maximum economic value from the steep undergraduate tuition and fees their families are paying, as well as the significant loans they may have taken on.

    What is the value of a liberal arts education?

    Boyle was responding to a report that, while the number of U.S. students pursuing four-year degrees in computer and information sciences rose 34 percent from 2017 to 2022, the number of English majors fell by 23 percent, and the number of history majors fell 12 percent. (The New Yorker, 2/27/23)

    Her facts are right. But her conclusion is dead wrong. There’s a much more beneficial way for both students and parents to think about the choice of a major and, especially, the “value” of a liberal arts education (including the contributions of the arts and humanities). As a liberal arts graduate herself with a B.A. in Government, Boyle should have known better.

    First of all, people tempted to think like Katherine Boyle should remember this projection: On average, today’s college grads will change careers – not just jobs, careers – up to nine times over their working lives. Ten years out, they might find themselves entering a field that wasn’t even imagined when they were in school.

    Given the accelerating rate of technical, economic, and social change today’s graduates will live through, why would we pressure young people to choose a course of studies that may set them up for only their first job?

    Succeeding in our rapidly evolving professional world will place a premium on the cognitive abilities associated with liberal arts education. These include: critical thinking, insightful reading, creativity, empathy, intellectual flexibility, curiosity, effective communication skills, the ability to access knowledge across a wide range of fields, and (most important of all!) the capacity and disposition to continue learning.

    Research shows that heads of large and small companies alike highly value these skills, and indeed, a surprising number of Fortune 500 CEOs themselves earned degrees in the arts or humanities.

    Furthermore, as New York Times columnist David Brooks has argued, cultivating these abilities also provides the best insurance against being replaced by Artificial Intelligence. (New York Times 7/31/2024) The good news: these skills can be developed along with most any major – provided students take full advantage of the general education and elective courses that are part of the curriculum in any college or university.

    Students who select a major based on a combination of interest and ability perform at higher levels

    Third, studies suggest that students who select a major based on a combination of interest and ability – what they want to do and are able to do well – rather than short-term employment goals, perform at significantly higher levels, both in college and afterward.

    This is no surprise to psychologists, who’ve long understood that intrinsic motivation eats extrinsic motivation for breakfast. We human beings consistently perform better when we are positively engaged in our work – when we take satisfaction from the activity itself. (Very Well Mind, 7/8/2025 updated)

    To be sure, I would never dissuade students from pursuing a “practical” major, provided they’re enthusiastic about that field. The world certainly needs more scientists, computing specialists, engineers, ethical business leaders, and others. That academic work – and related post-college careers – can be enormously satisfying.

    But it’s a profound mistake to choose one of those majors primarily because it appears to guarantee future prosperity.

    And since current employment conditions often make lousy predictors of future trends, that “guarantee” can be illusory. Today’s “sure path” to a high-paying career can easily become tomorrow’s ticket to redundancy. For instance, the tech industry was disproportionally hit by layoffs in 2023. The legal profession underwent a similar experience about a decade earlier, when the number of law school graduates significantly outpaced available positions in law firms.

    Choosing a major solely on the basis of potential financial return is like investing for retirement by playing the slots

    Trying to choose a major solely (or even primarily) on the basis of potential financial return is like investing for retirement by playing the slots. Moreover, in today’s world, the narrower a course of undergraduate studies, the shorter its useful life is likely to be.

    Finally and even more importantly, addressing our biggest societal challenges – climate change, political hyper-polarization, the opportunities and challenges associated with AI, etc. –will require significant input from people with expertise beyond what STEM or business degrees provide.

    For example, avoiding the worst-case scenarios for powerful new AI technologies will require people to bring perspectives from ethics, politics, history, sociology, psychology, and other relevant fields – even literature. As Brooks and many others have argued, those “soft” majors will continue to be critical, both for employers and for society at large.

    Taking all of this into account, here’s my best advice for college parents

    First, encourage your student to select a major in which they both have had success and that inspires a passion for learning, which they can carry with them into future endeavors. If it’s a “practical” major, great! But if it happens to be a branch of the humanities, social sciences, or the arts, don’t be afraid that pursuing that preferred major will make your child unemployable.

    There are simply too many examples that show the exact opposite will likely turn out to be true–especially if they cultivate the classical liberal arts cognitive abilities referenced above along the way.

    Second, the most effective pathways from undergraduate school to immediate post-college employment lead through internships. This can also be true for fields that require further post-graduate study: for example, medicine, law, architecture, etc. Every college or university today understands this, and virtually all of them have offices or career development centers dedicated to matching students with internships (increasingly, paid ones), regardless of their major.

    So, encourage your child to check out those opportunities at their school early on in their college career. (Freshman year is not too early.) Among other things, an internship provides a great way to test-drive a professional area to see if turns out to be as appealing, in fact, as it appeared from the outside. If it does, that experience may well lead to a post-college job offer (or a successful medical, law, or professional school application). If it doesn’t, then that’s an important lesson learned, and your student can turn their attention in a different direction.

    A parent’s primary role is to listen

    Finally, a parent’s primary role in this process is to listen, maybe ask a helpful question from time to time (for example, “Do you know what jobs some of the grads who chose that major are doing today?”), listen, perhaps offer a few helpful suggestions along the way (e.g., about internships), listen some more, and always offer support.

    My main point is that a college student needs to make and own these critical life choices, and not make them based on parental expectations or, worse, pressure. Furthermore, don’t be surprised if your student changes their mind, maybe more than once. College should be a time of exploration and discovery, and sometimes that journey is not a straight line.

    Students should resist calculations of what appears to be required in today’s job market.

    Our colleges and universities could do a much better job of helping students appreciate the enduring benefits of the cognitive skills highlighted above. But until they do, it’s up to students themselves (with the encouragement of their parents!) to intentionally seek out ways to develop them, while resisting cold-hearted calculations of what appears to be required by today’s job market.

    In this spirit, here’s a great question for any college parent: What could your student achieve if they knew they have your absolute confidence and support? None of us parents should ever waste an opportunity to convey that level of faith and encouragement to our children.

    An undergraduate education represents, quite literally, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to realize the double benefits of studying in a field that sparks a genuine intellectual passion and preparing for a future that will reward the broad cognitive abilities that an effective college education should instill. This isn’t “Book Club.” It’s rigorous preparation for a life that’s intellectually rich and – given our ever-evolving professional world – can be financially rewarding, too!

    More Great Reading:

    How to Speak to Your Teen About Picking a Major in College

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    Philip Glotzbach

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  • Parenting 101: Last-minute holiday shortcuts

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    Whether you’re just getting through Hanukkah or gearing up for Christmas, the holidays can be a stressful time. So here are some last-minute hoiliday shortcuts to save you time, money, and headaches!

    – Make use of leftovers. Or freeze em. Stash some leftover turkey and gravy into Ziploc bags and freeze them, or turn them into a great soup, pot pie, or club sandwich. There’s no reason to go through the trouble of preparing big meals unless you can make use of the leftovers (and save time cooking more lunches and dinners). Throw the carcass into a crockpot with leftover carrots and celery, some water, and let it do it’s thing all day for a terrific and flavourful (and easy) stock. If you really don’t know what to do with all those leftovers, make up some care packages for neighbours. Or donate it to a local soup kitchen.

    – Have extra Tupperware, baggies, and bins on-hand. Kids will be tearing through toys and playsets that have lots of little pieces, so it’s best to have a few organizational tools to keep things in order. That way, pieces won’t get lost. It will also make putting the new toys away later a little easier.

    – Have a potluck. Instead of hosting and being in charge of an entire meal, ask everyone to bring one dish so the food prep is more evenly distributed. Switch things up and do fondue or make-your-own pizzas.

    – Buy ready-made cookie, pastry and bread dough. Why make it from scratch when you already have so much to do?!

    – When baking, make extra and freeze it for last-minute gifts in a pinch. Package cookies in a brown paper bag decorated with your child’s artwork for a distinctly rustic look, or stack in a repurposed Pringles’ can for a creative touch.

    – Enlist help from the kids. Kids can do a lot around the holidays to lighten your load. Have them make homemade cards for neighbours and teachers, decorate cakes or cookies, or help with decorating by giving them simple projects like making paper chains. 

    – Take a little time for you. Stop for five minutes. Sip a cup of tea while watching the snowfall. I know you have lots to do, but you need to pause and rest, even for a few minutes.

    Happy Holidays!

    Melany xx

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  • Trying to ‘fix’ a missing ear caused a lifetime of trauma

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    By Louise Kinross

    Kate Gies was born without a right ear. In her memoir It Must Be Beautiful To Be Finished, the Toronto writer recounts the relentless efforts of plastic surgeons to “make her look normal.” Fourteen surgeries didn’t produce the desired result but did leave Gies with a sense of body shame and post-traumatic stress disorder. We spoke about her childhood.

    BLOOM: Within days of your birth, a plastic surgeon told your parents he could create an ear, even though you wouldn’t hear out of it. It sounds like the medical focus was on fixing what made you look different. Was there any discussion about the pros and cons, and possibly doing nothing? 

    Kate Gies: I don’t think so. After I was born my mother was asked if she drank during pregnancy. They also told my parents that I may never walk, see or hear, so a lot of fear was built up. Then a plastic surgeon came in and said: ‘I can fix this.’ I don’t think from the medical staff perspective it was seen as an option to not intervene. It was 1978. It was only supposed to be three surgeries, so it wasn’t seen as a big risk. It was seen as an easy fix, a no-brainer.  

    BLOOM: The first plan was to slip a plastic ear under skin taken from your buttocks. The surgeon said: ‘Once we slip it in, no one will ever have to know you didn’t have an ear.’ What happened in reality?

    Kate Gies: Essentially that didn’t happen. The first surgery they took a large square of skin from my buttocks and placed it where the ear would go. Then they slipped the plastic ear under it. Within a couple of weeks, my body rejected the plastic, and it became very infected. They had to take it out and they tried again. The second time it also became very infected, and they had to take it out again. After five surgeries in Kingston, Ont., the surgeon suggested I go to SickKids Hospital in Toronto.

    BLOOM: What was the approach at SickKids? 

    Kate Gies: The new plan was to take cartilage from my ribcage and form it into an ear, instead of using the plastic. In the first surgery, a tissue expander was inserted under the skin on the right side of my head. Then I went to the hospital weekly to get saline injections to expand the skin so that the doctors could eventually insert my rib cartilage underneath.  

    After a few weeks it all got very infected, and the doctors removed half of the tissue expander in hopes of salvaging the rest. I then got another infection and they had to remove all of it. They still went ahead and cut out cartilage from my ribs and inserted it under the expanded skin.

    That was the most violent surgery I had. I was in a lot of pain after the rib removal. Even today it’s very uncomfortable in the area the cartilage was removed. 

    Subsequent surgeries included skin grafts to form the ear lobe, adjust the ear lobe, and contour the shape of the ear. The surgeons also pinned my left ear to my head to approximate the position of the right ear they were building.

    I was never sure when I woke up what was going to be changed about my body. It was never the magical perky ear I’d imagined, but instead, snakes of stitches and scars. Swollen bits, redness, blood, and bruises.

    BLOOM: You write about two Kates—the Kate you were and the Kate you were supposed to be. How did that impact your sense of self?

    Kate Gies: It split me. There was an ideal version of me that existed only in my mind and the imagination of the doctors. Every time something happened to me—if I got made fun of, or didn’t make the volleyball team, or someone rejected me—there was this other Kate living simultaneously in another dimension who didn’t have to deal with that. She had lots of friends and people didn’t make fun of her. There was a splitting of my self, and I was the bad version. I compared myself to ‘The Kate I Was Supposed To Be’ constantly.

    BLOOM: What do you think might have happened if your parents said no to the surgery?

    Kate Gies: It’s possible I would have resented my parents for doing nothing. Because I wouldn’t have known how it was going to turn out. 

    I say in the book that the tragedy of my body was the attempted fixing of it, not being born without an ear. As a child, I never acclimatized to being put to sleep in the very foreign environment of the operating room. My anxiety got worse every time. I have a lot of residual trauma in my body from the surgeries and I was diagnosed in my 30s with complex post-traumatic stress disorder. 

    Being exposed constantly to plastic surgeons meant that I didn’t have good boundaries for my body. All my surgeons were older men and they were allowed to touch my body whenever they wanted to. That affected me as I got older in romantic relationships, because I didn’t know how to own my body. 

    The plastic surgeons also had very specific opinions about the ‘wrongness’ of my body. The very idea that there is something so wrong with your body that we must do violent things to it to make it okay made me feel that my body was bad. I’ve been given the message my whole life that there is something very wrong with my body.

    BLOOM: They kept doing surgical revisions and three surgeries turned into 14. Did you ever get angry at the surgeons because they misled you on what to expect?

    Kate Gies: It never occurred to me. The anger always went inward: Why can’t my body accept this plastic ear? Why did my body reject the tissue expander? Why is my body not behaving well? It never occurred to me to get mad at the doctors. 

    BLOOM: At age 14, when the surgeons are planning more operations, you say no. How did you get to that point?

    Kate Gies: I wish I could say I got a good sense of myself and the feminist in me blossomed, but that wasn’t it. I was at a point where my body couldn’t take it anymore. I was so tired of being cut into. Surgery is a violence, whether it’s necessary or not. I was also about to start high school. I always did well in school, and I didn’t want to constantly miss it for surgeries. 

    BLOOM: At age 13, a surgeon shows you that your smile is asymmetrical and tells you it can be fixed in a few surgeries. What impact did that have on you?

    Kate Gies: My smile suddenly wasn’t about feeling joy. It was this thing that subtracted from my physical appearance. So I stopped smiling. Or I closed my mouth when I smiled, and I became very conscious of my crookedness. It became another way my body was not performing well. 

    BLOOM: I remember a plastic surgeon pointing out two ways that my young son’s face was not symmetrical, but I, as his mother, had not noticed these things. It was very unsettling.

    Kate Gies: Doctors constantly pointed things out about my face, even to this day. Your mouth is crooked, this eye is different. I think we live in a world, especially now, with the advent of social media filters and more advanced medical technology, where we believe we can fix everything. Just because you can fix something doesn’t mean you should.

    BLOOM: What did you learn about the importance of symmetry in our culture?

    Kate Gies: We’re taught that symmetry equals beauty. But bodies aren’t perfect. I think plastic surgeons think of bodies in very linear ways. It’s sort of an unhealthy obsession to try to make a body perfect. It’s an impossible goal. 

    BLOOM: How much time did you spend trying to hide your lack of an ear?

    Kate Gies: I think as a little kid I didn’t hide it. I would wear these very large, gauche earrings on one side. I hadn’t been indoctrinated into the idea that bodies were supposed to look a certain way. 

    I started making myself small around the age of 12 and 13. That’s when what you look like feels like the most important thing. I kept my long hair down or in a low, messy ponytail when playing sports. I worked at Licks and I remember my boss saying: ‘Your ponytail is too messy.’ But I’d rather get fired than show that I had this ear.

    I also hid the scars on my body. I’d wear granny underwear as a young adult to hide the scar on my buttocks. I always wore one-piece bathing suits. In the change room after gym class I’d be super vigilant about how to remove my shirt so people wouldn’t see the scars on my chest and belly. I stood to the right of people to keep the ‘bad ear’ away from them. I’d turn in certain ways when being photographed to minimize my crookedness. All this hiding was exhausting.

    BLOOM: In your book, you say asking someone about a body difference is a form of violence. Can you explain?

    Kate Gies: I think people with facial difference, or any kind of body difference, often have some trauma related to it. Maybe you got into a car accident and have a scar on your face, or you’ve had years of bullying or gone through many surgeries. I shouldn’t have to relive my trauma to satiate your curiosity. 

    I’ll be going about my day and someone will say ‘What’s wrong with your face?’ Even asking that feels abusive. Your body is the vehicle within which you are in the world. Being asked about why something is wrong with it suggests there is something inherently bad about you.  

    BLOOM: In rehab, children are often taught that it’s their role to educate peers about their differences. There’s an interesting book called What happened to you? by a disabled author that pushes back against that. You note there are cultural ideas about why someone is born with a physical anomaly. For example, did the mother do something wrong? 

    Kate Gies: These ideas give people a sense of control of their body. That if they behave right, that won’t happen to me. 

    I think there’s a deep cultural fear of body difference and it comes down to a fear of mortality—a fear that bodies change and can break down. So instead of understanding that all bodies, if we’re lucky enough to live long, will change, we ‘other’ the people who have the body difference, so we can keep our distance from it.  

    It’s interesting because when I published the book, I think my mother was afraid because she was holding on to some shame, too. ‘Let’s blame the mother’ has been around for centuries. I don’t think this was the case for my dad.

    We also live in a world where people with facial difference are often portrayed as villains in the media—think James Bond or Batman movies. Villains often have some kind of facial difference or disability and the message is reinforced that having a different body makes someone bad.

    BLOOM: What do you hope doctors take from your story?

    Kate Gies: I love this question, and no one is asking it. For me, the best doctors have been the ones that have spoken to me like a person not an object. They’ve shown a grace and empathy towards me, don’t make assumptions, and don’t ask questions out of curiosity.

    Doctors need to understand that patients are the experts on their bodies. Perhaps when talking to children and parents, a doctor could say: ‘Here are some options’ and include ‘You can do nothing. Or perhaps you’d like to have some counselling to help you consider things.’ And also drive home the point that there is nothing inherently wrong or ‘unhealthy’ about a child with a facial difference.

    Doctors need to understand the cultural and societal messages about body difference that impact their own biases and understanding. They need to interrogate their own ways of reinforcing negative messages. This is so important as doctors are culturally seen as an authority on the body.

    I think a big question doctors need to ask themselves, especially when working with people with body difference, is: ‘Why are you pushing this surgery?’

    Doctors need training around their role in disability awareness and body image. Do you look at body difference as a sickness? If so, what are you missing out on that you can learn from your patients?

    Also, doctors need to understand their role in mitigating medical trauma. Medical trauma to the body is often unavoidable, but what doctors can do is show kindness, empathy, and genuine care for the wellbeing of their patients. I firmly believe that the relationships doctors have with their patients can greatly diminish the effects of medical trauma. Especially for children.

    Doctors need to be conscious of how they are relating to their child patients in real time. Are you going to be the doctor who tells a 13-year-old child that her face is crooked? What implicit messages are you sending in your clinical evaluation? How can you be better at making sure that the patient doesn’t leave your office feeling like shit? The relationship you have with a patient absolutely affects their health, their trust in you, and their sense of trauma. 

    I talk in the book about a meeting with my pediatrician, who I had a good relationship with. One day she brought in a resident and started talking to him as if I was a freak of nature. That felt like such a betrayal of trust. I couldn’t articulate it at the time, but I did ask my mother: ‘Why didn’t you put me to sleep when I was born?’
     

    Kate Gies is a writer and teaches creative nonfiction and expressive arts at George Brown College. Like this content? Sign up for our monthly BLOOM e-letter, follow BLOOM editor @LouiseKinross on X, or watch our A Family Like Mine video series. 

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    lkinross

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  • Gift Guide 2025: Haircare gifts everyone will love

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    Know someone who is hair obsessed? Then they’ll likely have one (or more) of these haircare items on their holiday wish list.

    L’Oreal Glycolic Gloss Shine Trio Set is a shampoo, conditioner, and treatment trio powered by an up to 17% Glycolic Acid Gloss Complex that penetrates deeply into the hair fiber to improve hair quality and seal cuticles with a lasting glossy effect. Perfect for dull, porous hair, this three-step routine transforms your hair, leaving it two times shinier and 88% smoother for up to 10 washes.

    The Dreame AirStyle Pro 7-in-1 Hair Styler & High Speed Dryer has seven snap-on attachments to transform your look effortlessly. From sleek straight styles to voluminous curls, this all-in-one tool adapts to every hair type, giving you salon-quality results at home.

    The Shark Glam Hot Tool Air Styling & Drying System is where your holiday glow-up starts. It’s designed with innovative heat-controlled ceramic and powerful airflow that will let you unlock smooth silky finishes, glossy blowouts, and ultra-high-shine styles without heat damage on wet and dry hair. Whether you’re prepping for festive gatherings or gifting glam to someone special, this is the gift that will transform anyone’s hair routine and have everyone asking what tool they used.

    The Phillips OneBlade does it all. Trim, edge, and shave any length of hair on the face, body, and below-the-belt. It’s the multitasker you didn’t know you needed until you had it.

    The new Dyson Airwrap multi-styler and dryer is the most powerful Dyson Airwrap multi-styler for supercharged styling. That means better curling, faster drying, and straighter styles without damage from heat.

    Designme Dream Mane is a deep hydration and shine limited-edition holiday kit. It features the complete GLOSS.ME hydration and shine collection in mini sizes, and is designed to moisturize, smooth frizz, boost shine, and make hair more manageable.

    Olaplex’s Full-On Shine Set defies expectations by delivering smoother, stronger, shinier hair in just one use. This collection, featuring No.0.5 Scalp Longevity Treatment, No.3 Hair Perfector, No.4 Bond Maintenance Shampoo, No.5 Bond Maintenance Conditioner, and full sizes of No.6 Bond Smoother and OLAPLEX No.7 Bonding Oil, works together to repair, cleanse, and style for sleek softness, frizz control, and luminous shine.   

    The Curlsmith Curl Discovery Kit is a collection of four mini bestsellers, for all curl types, that cleanses, conditions, and provides definition and hold. It includes Essential Moisture Shampoo, Essential Moisture Conditioner, Weightless Air-Dry Leave-in Conditioning Cream, and Curl Defining Styling Hair Souffle Gel. 

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    By: Jennifer Cox The Suburban

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  • “How Rewriting the Past Can Help You Overcome ADHD Shame”

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    Shame — that deep sense of inadequacy and unworthiness — has the unique ability to travel across time, informing our present and our future. While the work of rebuilding self-worth happens in the now, it also often requires a trip to the past.

    If shame weighs on you, loosen its grip by incorporating these two short exercises (the same I share with my clients) into your days. Over time, these activities will rewire your mind and shift your focus from perceived inadequacies to self-compassion, growth, and progress.

    Anti-Shame Activity: Alternative Endings

    Think of an incident that triggered shame. (Start small.) Come up with three different endings for this uncomfortable, even painful, situation that you can feel better about.

    ⚡ Read: 9 Truths About ADHD and Intense Emotions

    Say you felt ashamed recently for talking over an acquaintance. You can imagine an ending where you gently laughed off the interruption and said to them, “Sorry, I got so excited there that I couldn’t hold it in. Please, continue — I really want to hear what you have to say.”

    Develop goals based on what you learned from this activity. For example, you may want to come up with mantras to help you stay present and actively listen. You may also want to build a habit of quickly acknowledging, apologizing, and moving on when interruptions happen (which takes practice!).

    Imagined endings are not denial or daydreaming. They are therapy-based tools that force you to reckon with shame. They teach your brain a new route, encourage you to forgive yourself, and weaken shame’s hold. Don’t worry if this exercise feels awkward at first — forming new grooves takes time and practice.

    Anti-Shame Activity: Hidden Gifts

    Think of three people you know well in your life. For each, write down three of their strengths or good qualities. Then, ask them to do the same for you. You can say, “I’m doing an insights exercise. Would you be willing to share three strengths that you see me use when things get hard? One sentence is perfect.”

    💡 Read: How to Do a Strengths Inventory

    It may feel awkward to do this activity, but the response from my clients is overwhelmingly positive. Many note that it’s a profound experience filled with many surprises.

    Don’t think of this activity as your typical strengths and weaknesses list. Its purpose is not necessarily self-improvement, but self-insight and self-appreciation — strong antidotes to shame and feelings of inadequacy.

    Set a goal to review the responses regularly. Consider creating a reminder or monthly appointment on your calendar to nudge you to read through the responses.

    If your shame is tied to trauma, depression, or thoughts of self-harm, bring these exercises to a licensed clinician to ensure you have support.

    How to Get Rid of Shame: Next Steps


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    Nathaly Pesantez

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  • One latte. Two hours. Zero regrets.

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    If you’ve ever wished for a grocery stop that felt more like visiting a neighbor than tackling a big box store, Willow Whole Health Market & Coffee Shop might be just what you’re looking for. This little shop on Locust Hill Road, tucked next to Sushi Shack in the Taylors/Greer area, offers a slower, friendlier kind of shopping — and a cozy place to sip a warm drink, too.

    We stopped by recently and loved the experience.

    The Willow Whole Foods Health Market

    Quick Summary: The Willow

    Willow Whole Health Market & Coffee Shop
    📍 Locust Hill Road, Taylors/Greer (next to Sushi Shack)
    🛒 Organic groceries, local milk, eggs, and meats
    ☕ Organic Coffee and tea with dietary-conscious options
    🪑 Cozy indoor seating in the back of the shop

    A Tiny Market Full of Local Finds

    Willow is a small shop, but every shelf is full of something fabulous. During our visit, we noticed a steady stream of regulars popping in — many heading straight for the fridge stocked with local milk, butter, and Happy Cow dairy. A few were greeted by name. It’s that kind of place.

    In addition to the usual healthy staples — natural pantry goods — we found:

    • Local eggs and sourdough bread
    • Southern Oaks butter (so good!)
    • Frozen local meats
    • Jams, pickles, and grits made nearby

    The market also caters to folks with food sensitivities, offering gluten-free, sugar-free, and dairy-free options throughout the store.

    The space is small but bright, and the staff couldn’t have been more helpful. They answered questions, gave us tips on favorite products, and were genuinely kind — no big-store rush or pressure.

    I left the shop with a loaf of local sourdough and some fresh butter from Southern Oaks dairy. Let me tell you, add a local egg, and that’s 100% a championship breakfast kind of thing right there. I’m layering on that butter like it’s cream cheese. So good.

    A Quiet Spot to Sip and Stay Awhile

    Toward the back of the market, you’ll find a warm little seating area and an organic coffee counter offering lattes, teas, and bakery treats. It’s relaxed and unpretentious — the kind of place you could bring your laptop or a friend and settle in.

    One of us ordered a gingerbread cookie latte made with oat milk, and it hit the spot — not too sweet, with a cozy spice flavor. We also shared a cinnamon roll (definitely worth it). The coffee menu includes options for different dietary needs, and it felt good to enjoy something that didn’t come from a chain.

    The back seating area has soft chairs and a laid-back vibe, perfect for quietly getting things done or just enjoying a peaceful pause in your day.

    We spent about 2 hours getting some Kidding Around teamwork accomplished, and we enjoyed our time so much that we knew we had to share this spot with you! (See, we’re always looking out for our readers!)

    We’ll be back: The Willow Whole Health Market

    The WillowThe Willow

    Willow isn’t flashy, and that’s kind of the point. It’s small, friendly, and focused on real, good-for-you food — the kind that supports local farmers and leaves you feeling taken care of.

    Whether you’re picking up a jug of raw milk, browsing for a thoughtful food gift, or just stopping in for a quiet cup of coffee, Willow Whole Health Market & Coffee Shop is a sweet little stop worth knowing about.

    2339 Locust Hill Road, Greer, SC
    The Willow Facebook Page


    Coffee shops in Greenville, SCCoffee shops in Greenville, SC

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    Maria Bassett

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  • Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids

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    Getting kids to eat healthy can be a challenge, especially when it comes to traditional foods. Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids is a simple, wholesome South Indian dish that checks all the right boxes for growing children. Made with semolina and gently steamed, it is light on the tummy, easy to digest, and packed with energy. When prepared with the right ingredients like fresh coconut, vegetables, or protein-rich add-ons Rava Puttu becomes a nutritious meal that supports kids’ growth while still tasting delicious. In this blog, we’ll explore why Rava Puttu is a great choice for kids and how you can make it both healthy and appealing for little eaters.

    Health Benefits of Rava for Kids

    • Good Source of Energy
      Rava is rich in carbohydrates, which provide instant and sustained energy, important for active, growing children.
    • Easy to Digest
      Light on the stomach, rava is gentle for young digestive systems, making it suitable for toddlers and kids.
    • Supports Brain Development
      Rava contains B-complex vitamins (like thiamine and folate) that help support brain function, concentration, and memory.
    • Aids Healthy Growth
      It provides essential nutrients such as iron and magnesium, which are important for physical growth and overall development.
    • Promotes Gut Health
      When combined with vegetables, pulses, or fiber-rich ingredients, rava helps maintain good digestion and prevents constipation.
    • Keeps Kids Full Longer
      Rava-based meals are filling and satisfying, helping reduce frequent snacking on unhealthy foods.

    Rava puttu recipe

    Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids is a simple, wholesome South Indian dish that checks all the right boxes for growing children.

    Ingredients

    • 1 cup fine rava (semolina)
    • ½ cup fresh grated coconut
    • ½ cup warm milk (adjust as needed)
    • 1–2 tsp powdered jaggery or palm sugar
    • A pinch of cardamom powder
    • 1 tbsp mixed dry fruits (chopped)
    • 1-2 tbsp ghee

    Method

    • Dry roast rava on low flame until aromatic. Cool completely.
    • Sprinkle warm milk little by little over the rava.
    • Mix with fingers until you get a moist, crumbly texture. When pressed, it should hold shape but crumble easily.
    • Steam for 8–10 minutes until soft and cooked. Heat 1–2 teaspoons of ghee in a small pan.
    • Add finely chopped dry fruits and saute on low flame until aromatic.
    • Pour the warm ghee and dry fruits over the steamed puttu.
    • Gently mix or sprinkle on top before serving.
    Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids is a simple, wholesome South Indian dish that checks all the right boxes for growing children.

    Rava Puttu recipe for kids is a wholesome, soft, and nourishing meal that fits perfectly into healthy diet. Made with simple ingredients like rava, milk, coconut, and finished with ghee and dry fruits after steaming, it provides the right balance of energy, taste, and nutrition. Easy to digest and gentle on little tummies, this traditional dish can be customized to suit your child’s age and preference. Including Sweet Rava Puttu in your kids’ meal routine is a delicious way to introduce healthy eating habits from an early age.

    Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids is a simple, wholesome South Indian dish that checks all the right boxes for growing children.
    Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids is a simple, wholesome South Indian dish that checks all the right boxes for growing children.

    Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids

    Healthy and Nutritious Rava Puttu for Kids is a simple, wholesome South Indian dish that checks all the right boxes for growing children.

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    Keyword: Rava Puttu for Kids

    Ingredients

    • 1 cup fine rava (semolina)
    • ½ cup fresh grated coconut
    • ½ cup warm milk (adjust as needed)
    • 1–2 tsp powdered jaggery or palm sugar
    • A pinch of cardamom powder
    • 1 tbsp mixed dry fruits (chopped)
    • 1-2 tbsp ghee

    Instructions

    • Dry roast rava on low flame until aromatic. Cool completely.

    • Sprinkle warm milk little by little over the rava.

    • Mix with fingers until you get a moist, crumbly texture. When pressed, it should hold shape but crumble easily.

    • Steam for 8–10 minutes until soft and cooked. Heat 1–2 teaspoons of ghee in a small pan.

    • Add finely chopped dry fruits and saute on low flame until aromatic.

    • Pour the warm ghee and dry fruits over the steamed puttu.

    • Gently mix or sprinkle on top before serving.

    Frequently Asked Questions

    1. Is rava puttu good for kids?

    Yes, rava puttu is healthy for kids. It is easy to digest, provides good energy, and supports growth when prepared with nutritious ingredients like milk, coconut, ghee, and dry fruits.


    2. Can I use milk instead of water for sweet rava puttu?

    Yes, using milk makes the pittu softer and more nutritious.

    3. Can I make rava puttu without sugar or jaggery?

    Yes, you can make a no-sugar version using natural sweetness from milk, coconut, or mashed banana.

    4. How do I make rava puttu extra soft for toddlers?

    Use fine rava, moisten with warm milk gradually, steam well, and mash lightly before serving.

    Buy Healthy Nutritious Baby, Toddler food made by our own Doctor Mom !

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  • College Decision: Why Your Teen Needs Your Help

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    I did not let my sons make a college decision alone. I just didn’t. When they knew their options, I did not throw up my hands and say, “It is your life, it is your four years, it is your decision. I don’t have much to add.”

    Today’s parenting orthodoxy suggests that they are adults, highly informed, and capable of making college decisions without parental intervention. Look, just one mom’s opinion, but…no.

    teen boy walking down stairs
    I wanted to help my sons learn how to think through their college decision, not make it for them. (Pexels)

    Deciding which college to attend is one of the greatest teaching moments in our kids’ lives, and there was no way I would quietly let this slip by. It is a chance to show our teens how to consider, carefully reflect and make a sizeable complex decision. It was a chance to teach them about scratching below the surface when weighing two options. It was a turning point in our lives where I didn’t decide with their help but vice versa.

    In weighing their options, my sons asked my husband, their father, what he thought they should do. He refused to answer, telling them that he would talk it through with them endlessly, but at this point, it wasn’t his opinion but theirs that mattered. Me? Yeah, I blurted my opinions out in five minutes. Let’s just say that there are different approaches that parents can take.

    Yet, letting them figure out how to frame the college decision on their own seemed a dereliction of duty.

    I was not going to decide on which school to attend (even with my propensity to over-parent, I knew I was not going along for the four years), but I was going to show them the many ways to think about something that would have such a big impact on their lives. But mostly, honestly, we talked.

    11 ways parents can help their teen think through a college decision

    1. Advice

    We talked about how you seek out good advice and what you learn to ignore. Over the process of deciding, they learned to tune out those who knew less than they did (by and large, parent and grandparent types who offered information that was 30 or more years out of date) and to focus on those who knew them well or knew more than they did about the experience they were considering.

    2. Pros and Cons

    We discussed weighing the pros and cons of any decision and then weighing those factors by what matters most to you. Most decisions in life are complicated and usually involve some element of compromise.

    3. Last Two Years of College

    We talked about trying to imagine yourself, not next year at 18, but three or four years from now, and whether the same things will be vital to you that are important today.

    4. Leaving Friends

    We talked about how hard it is to leave friends to move away and strain those ties. But if their parent’s generation, without the aid of social media, could maintain lifelong friendships, they would too.

    5. Keeping Options Open

    We talked about how they might not know what they want to study or might know and change their minds, but that, like so many other things in life, there is value in keeping some options open. However, there is almost always a price of some sort to pay for that flexibility.

    6. Course Requirements

    We delved deep into the colleges’ websites and discussed the course requirements for their first two years of study. I told them what I had thought they liked and disliked about high school and how that might be important information in thinking through the next step in their education.

    7. Opportunities

    We talked about what was important in their time in college. I am sure I spoke about once-in-a-lifetime learning experiences, and they talked about fun. In the end, we appreciated each other’s points of view.

    8. Living Somewhere Else

    We talked about how college is one of the most significant opportunities to learn about a different place, and while you might want to go to school close to home, it is worth at least thinking about living elsewhere.

    9. Money

    We talked about money. Until my kids were making a college decision, the most significant spending decision they had ever made occurred in J. Crew, where I did say, “It is your money, so you need to decide if you like the blue or the grey better.”

    This was not a $250,000 decision but a very different magnitude. My sons probably won’t be faced with a spending decision of this size until they take out a mortgage, and they will do that with a 30 or 32-year-old brain, not a 17-year-old one. And it will be their money, not mine.

    10. Listen to Yourself

    We talked about listening first and foremost to yourself and whether the decision is right or wrong, owning it, taking responsibility for it, and making the best of it.

    11. Not Alone

    We talked about how you don’t need to make big decisions alone and that those who love you best are there to challenge you, question you, offer you counsel and then get on your side with whatever decision you make.

    In time they will decide about jobs, houses, and spouses. They will make many life-changing decisions without so much sending me a text. But on those nights when they lie in bed mulling over their options, wondering what the best course of action is, I hope that something of that spring when they were 17 comes back to them.

    You Might Also Want to Read:

    High School Senior Year: The Beginning of the End

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    Lisa Endlich Heffernan

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  • Five Ways Your College Freshman Will be Different When They Come Home

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    If you sent a baby off to college a couple months ago, there’s a good chance right about now that you’re over the moon with the fact that the holidays and winter break are right around the corner. You’re probably eager to do things like make all their favorite foods, spend hours on the couch talking about college life and new experiences/friendships he’s made, and maybe catch a movie or two together. 

    It’s gonna be so great! 

     man in airport
    The first year student you left at college will be very different when they return home for the holidays. (Twenty20 @domalantaadonijah)

    Until it isn’t, because that baby you got all set up in the dorm? Well, they aren’t that baby anymore. 

    What I mean by this is, even in just a short time not living under your roof, the average 18-year-old freshman away at college will return home for that first school break and not be the kid they were when they left. Now stay with me here moms and dads, because this isn’t the tragedy you may think it is. This is actually a GOOD thing.

    5 changes to expect when your teen comes home

    1. They act like they don’t want to be home

    If when they come home they seem to not be super into wanting to spend quality time with the family, that’s totally normal. Remember how during the teen years you learned to not take everything so personally? Time to do that again.

    Here’s the deal, it’s not YOU, it’s THEM. They’ve been living their best life away from home, and upon returning, everything feels awkward because it IS awkward, and that’s OK! Just be present in the background, for now. 

    2. Sleep, sleep, sleep, and more sleep

    I’ve never in my life seen a child more tired than when they first come home from college. It’s like they just escaped from triathlon training camp and finally can have a lie in.

    Don’t be concerned if during the 5-ish days they’re home, they only appear to be alert when the pumpkin pie is served. Again, totally normal. Let them enjoy all the zzzzz’s they want, all comfy in their own bed, and without roommate disruptions. Or hangovers. 

    3. Speaking of hangovers…and curfews…

    Look, I’m not naive, and I had no intention of thinking my college freshman hasn’t partaken in some good ‘ol fashioned keg beer slugging at some point their first semester away. But that behavior ends at my door.

    They may come home feeling bold and brash enough to say, “Mom, I drink at college, why can’t I drink here?” or something similar, but I have a strict, “My house, my rules” standard that they’ll be forced to comply with. Trust me, you’re going to hear, “But, but, but, I stay out all night at college!” That’s great, but you’re not at college right now.

    End of discussion. 

    4. What happened to my shy, quiet kid?

    There’s an odd phenomena I’ve seen happen not only with my kids, but also friend’s kids, and it goes something like this…the kids who don’t really enjoy (or get the most out of) their high school experience, tend to really find their groove at college.

    Did you leave a hesitant wallflower at college? Well, John Belushi may show up for the holidays. Just roll with it. If they’re on their phone What’sApp-ing their 25 new BFFs all night long, be thankful. The alternative is they come home miserable and don’t want to go back. 

    5. Freshman change, and so do their majors, political leanings, food preferences….

    These are the four years of your kid’s life where they can metaphorically “try on” different personality characteristics, and are free to change their minds about anything and everything and trust me, they do. Your kid who left and was pre-med? He may come home wanting to be an English major.

    Have a new vegan in the house? Not surprised. Wait, is that a beard they’re sporting? It’s fine. Everything is fine. And just like they’re not the same kid who left you, they will most definitely NOT be the same kid next year or the year after that. 

    Don’t panic, these four years are the most fun to watch from the sidelines, and you’re not gonna believe how in four years your baby will become a legit grownup. Now relax and go make them peel some sweet potatoes for you!

    More Great Reading:Home for the Holidays? Here are the 8 Things to Expect From College Kids

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    Melissa Fenton

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  • The Feeling of Disappointment When Teens Come Home for the Holidays

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    The wait is over. Our college students are home for the holidays. I’ve grown accustomed to empty nesting, faster than I’d ever anticipated, but I still looked forward to shoes cluttering the hallway and laughter from downstairs keeping me awake at night. 

    woman thinking
    Now that my teens are home for the holidays, I feel irrelevant. (Twenty20 @lmallo)

    In preparation for their homecoming, I’d shopped for their favorite snacks, cleaned their rooms from top to bottom and made homemade cookies close enough to their arrival time that the house would be filled with that fresh-baked smell. I’d been so excited to have a full house again, especially after enduring several long and lonely months. I’d felt like a young child awaiting Christmas morning as I counted down the hours for my kids to walk through the side door. 

    My teens are finally home

    They’ve been home for several days now, and I’m still waiting for that anticipated sigh of relief of having everyone under one roof. Instead, I find myself wandering through the house aimlessly, uncharacteristically tidying and looking for new ways to keep my mind occupied.

    Confused at why I was feeling so unsettled, I sought out my husband for advice. I found him in the basement, emptying storage closets and sorting through countless plastic bins. He was purging, trying to get organized. That’s where his nervous energy goes when his heart starts to ache. 

    He turned to me and asked, “Why do we suddenly seem so irrelevant to them?”

    Our kids. He was referring to our kids. Surrounded by mementos representing varying phases of their lives—the Fisher Price dollhouse, dress-up clothes, Legos, jigsaw puzzles from every family vacation we’d taken together and a sampling of soccer cleats and wrestling shoes—my husband immediately clarified what I’d been feeling since our kids had arrived. 

    I knew it would be somewhat difficult for them to come home. They’d each lived on their own for different lengths of time and under different circumstances. Returning to an environment where someone else wants to know where you’re going and waits up for you to return can be stifling. I get it. I’d been there myself. So, I’d try my best to honor the freedom and independence they’d grown accustomed to. Turns out, that’s not the challenging part. 

    My home is now full, the loneliness remains

    My house is full, but the loneliness remains. It’s a different kind of lonely, maybe even worse than the kind that comes with being alone. Surrounded by my loved ones, I too feel irrelevant. In less than twenty-four hours, the cookies were gone, and their bedrooms completely cluttered.

    My son picked up right where he’d left off a semester ago, spending most of his time in his room before dashing off to a friend’s house. My daughter at least parks herself in the family room, but only feigns interest in our lives between episodes of her favorite Netflix shows. 

    That’s why I feel so anxious. I’ve been suppressing my emotions to avoid facing my disappointment. I’d had this grand idea of how joyful our house would be when the kids returned, how happy we’d be and how much fun we would have. But their idea of fun doesn’t quite fit with ours at the moment. They’re young adults who’ve missed their friends. Again, I remember it well. 

    To my own mom and dad, I’m sorry if I ever made you feel irrelevant. You aren’t and never were. I finally understand how much it hurts when you pour your heart and soul into raising a family, only to have them grow up and pull away to pursue their own lives. It’s natural—exactly what’s supposed to happen—but that doesn’t make it any easier. 

    The circle of life can bring happiness and pain in one simple breath. But the point of it is to keep moving forward. Not to dwell on the downside, but to keep grabbing moments of joy when they come your way. 

    Relationships with our children evolve drastically as they enter adulthood. The kids may be hyper-focused on their own lives now, but that won’t last. As they grow older, they’ll come around again. Requesting recipes so they can cook their own holiday meals. Asking for advice on how to raise their own children. And seeking counsel on a variety of unknowns the same way we turned to our parents. 

    This stage of life is different but there is still room for parents

    This stage of life might be different, but that doesn’t mean there’s no room for us. We’ll always be their parents—the people who raised them, encouraged them, believed in them wholeheartedly, and advocated for them when no one else would. We did our best to expose them to life’s offerings and taught them right from wrong. So, even if we’re no longer the center of their universe, they remain the center of ours. 

    And we consider ourselves blessed that they still want to come home at all. 

    Now that I understand where all this nervous energy originates, I won’t change much over the next few weeks besides shifting my expectations. I’ll still wander aimlessly, fussing over the house and the holiday meal. But I’ll allow myself to feel all the feels and stop sheltering my heart.

    I’ll appreciate each and every second of our family time together now no matter how sparse it might be and remember that there’s plenty to look forward to. Laughter and conversation. Hello hugs and goodbye kisses. Sharing a bottle of wine over dinner or several beers around the pool next summer. Future family vacations, birthdays, weddings and grandchildren. 

    Yikes, did I just say grandchildren?

    More to Read:

    Dear Kids, I Promise Not to Be a Pain About How We Celebrate the Holidays

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    Susan Poole

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  • SC has one of the biggest paintball + airsoft fields in the world

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    Whether you love paintball, airsoft, both, or you’re completely new to the game, Red Fox Games in Woodruff, SC is a great place to dive in. This family-friendly field is staffed with people who truly care about your experience — they’re always there to help, make your day fun, and keep things safe. Kidding Around Teen Contributor, Nathaniel, has gone many times and always felt welcome.

    Did you know? Red Fox Games is the 10th largest paintball and airsoft field in the world, with 13 playing fields spread across 162 acres of beautiful nature preserve. It’s big, bold, and perfect for a full day of outdoor adventure.

    Playing Airsoft at RedFox Games
    Photo Credit: AirsoftX

    What Red Fox Offers

    Red Fox is open every weekend and offers a wide range of services to make your game day awesome. Here’s what you’ll find:

    • All-day access to paintball and airsoft fields
    • Rental gear and on-site technicians for both paintball markers and airsoft guns
    • Ammunition and gear available for purchase
    • Drinks available for sale (no food)
    • A porta-john on site for player use

    Food: They have drinks for sale but no food. However, there may be restaurants that will deliver during your 1-hour break. Domino’s has delivered to the field before.

    Airsoft X: Red Fox also partners with Airsoft X, a passionate team that’s building a strong airsoft community in the Upstate. More on them below.

    What Is Paintball?

    Paintball is a high-energy outdoor game where you’ll use a paintball marker (or gun) to shoot small plastic balls filled with paint at the opposing team. When someone gets hit, they’re out unless they can respawn. It’s fast-paced, colorful fun with lots of movement and teamwork.

    Hiding at Red Fox GamesHiding at Red Fox Games
    Photo Credit: Airsoft X

    What Is Airsoft?

    Airsoft is a bit more tactical. It’s similar to paintball but uses small 6mm plastic BBs fired at varying speeds. Players are out when hit — unless the game mode allows respawning. Think strategy, speed, and communication to tackle various challenges like capture the flag.

    Who Will Enjoy Playing at Red Fox Games?

    Anyone who enjoys a fun struggle will love paintball and airsoft. You’ll be outside in the dirt, heat or cold, faced with various scenarios given by the referees. These challenges usually involve two teams on opposite sides trying to eliminate each other or complete an objective. You don’t have to come with a team; all players on site will split up. It’s totally ok to come by yourself or with just a couple of friends.

    It’s important to listen to the referees. They keep the games fair and fun.

    My Experience at Red Fox Games

    I have gone many times for airsoft and a few times for paintball, and every single time, the Red Fox staff and the Airsoft X team have been extremely helpful and patient with everyone.

    I love how the community is so supportive of new players, whether they’re just getting into the hobby or just visiting for a fun day with friends. On multiple occasions, I’ve seen experienced players hand off their high-end airsoft guns to brand new players just so they could enjoy the game even more.

    Meet Airsoft X

    Airsoft X launched in early 2025 and now partners with Red Fox Games to bring consistent, fun, and welcoming airsoft gameplay to the Upstate. The team is always ready to help new players, answer questions, and keep things moving smoothly on game day.

    Airsoft X at Red Fox Games in Woodruff, SCAirsoft X at Red Fox Games in Woodruff, SC
    Photo Credit: Airsoft X

    They’ve already grown significantly, offering special weekend events and night games in partnership with AOSC (Airsoft of South Carolina). They also provide a detailed guide for beginners, which is definitely worth checking out if you’re just getting started.

    Meeting the staff at Airsoft X has always been a pleasure. Their dedication to growing the sport and building a strong community is something I really admire.

    Thanks to Airsoft X for providing some of these photos! It’s very hard to get them while playing the game!

    What Players Are Saying

    Many airsofters have shared how much fun they’ve had at Red Fox — from new game modes to friendly, respectful staff who always listen to player feedback.

    I can personally say Airsoft X has been a blast, and I always enjoy my time playing airsoft with them. The staff is committed to creating an environment where everyone feels welcome and part of the action.

    If you’re even thinking about trying airsoft or paintball, I highly recommend giving it a shot at Red Fox Games with Airsoft X.

    Getting Started: Renting vs. Buying

    I recommend renting your first few times to get a feel for what you do and don’t enjoy. If you rent and realize this isn’t your thing, $30–$60 is a small price compared to buying your own gear.

    Once you know you enjoy the sport, you can buy your own gear attuned to your playstyle. For airsoft, I recommend using Evike and checking out the guide from Airsoft X.

    Pricing Breakdown (All-Day Play)

    Whether you’re bringing your own gear or trying it out for the first time, Red Fox keeps things affordable for families and casual players.

    Paintball

    • $20 – Entry with your own gear
    • $30 – Standard rental (marker, mask, tank, 100 rounds)
    • $65 – Premium rental (upgraded marker, hopper, and 150 rounds)

    Airsoft

    • $30 – Entry with your own gear
    • $60 – Full rental (airsoft gun, mask, 1,000 BBs)

    It may be wise to bring some extra cash in case you run out of ammo — you can buy more on-site.

    Safety First: Age & Gear Guidelines at Red Fox

    • Airsoft players must be at least 10 years old
    • Paintball has no strict minimum age, but players under 10 must have adult accompaniment
    • All players under 18 must wear full face protection
    • A waiver is required to play (available online or on-site)

    Photos: Red Fox Games, Woodruff, SC & Airsoft X

    Red Fox Games Paintball and Airsoft XRed Fox Games Paintball and Airsoft X

    Teens, things to do in Greenville, SCTeens, things to do in Greenville, SC

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    Nathaniel Bassett

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  • Our favorite Great Wolf Lodge? LaGrange, GA might be it 🐾

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    If you’ve never been to a Great Wolf Lodge, this massive family resort blends themed accommodations, onsite dining, holiday programming, and a gigantic indoor water park—along with many more indoor attractions. And if you have been to one, we think this might be the best one yet! Add to that the Hallmark charm of the surrounding city of LaGrange, and you’re looking at the perfect family getaway.

    Thanks to Great Wolf Lodge for hosting us so we could share this experience with our readers. For reader convenience, pricing details are included in this article, but please note that all pricing is subject to change and should be verified with Great Wolf Lodge in LaGrange, GA before finalizing your trip.


    Quick Look at Great Wolf Lodge in LaGrange, GA
    📍 150 Tom Hall Parkway, LaGrange, Georgia 30240
    🏨 Standard, themed, and premium suites available
    💲 Basic rooms start around $250, with themed and premium suites priced higher
    🚗 Extra $15/day per vehicle in the parking lot
    💦 Indoor water park access included with stay
    🎄 Seasonal programming, like Snowland, is included with stay
    🎉 Free daily activities such as crafts, shows, and character events
    🐾 Pup, Paw, and Wolf Passes available for add-on attractions
    🍔 Variety of in-resort dining options
    🎁 Free wolf ears for every guest
    🗺️ Tons of charm + added adventure in LaGrange


    Meet Great Wolf Lodge: An Epic Stay with Immersive Family Fun

    Great Wolf Lodge is the largest chain of indoor water parks in North America, with more than 20 locations across the United States and Canada. Each one features family-oriented accommodations with a rustic woodland theme, and additional attractions and dining options to engage overnight guests and daytime visitors.

    Great Wolf Lodge in LaGrange, GA is one of the newer locations, opening in 2018. When we told our readers about our visit, a few responded that this Great Wolf Lodge is their favorite—and it was easy to see why! The decorations were incredible, all the guest spaces were clean, and the staff were patient and polite. There are so many things to do, and we could have enjoyed our whole weekend without ever leaving the hotel.

    With that said, we did make some excursions into the city and found that LaGrange was like something out of a Hallmark movie! If you’ve never visited this area, plan to stay several days to enjoy the best of both the city and the resort, especially during the holidays.

    Great Wolf Lodge is extremely popular and has a busy feel to it, so for a truly relaxing trip, plan ahead as much as you can in advance. We recommend booking your suite, purchasing passes around the attractions you want to enjoy, and deciding in advance what you want to explore in the surrounding city during on your visit.

    We’ve pulled together details on everything you need to plan your perfect itinerary. Take a look, and we hope you have a wonderful vacation!


    Plan Your Perfect Arrival

    We want your visit to Great Wolf Lodge to be zero stress, so we’re going to start by walking you through the arrival process. We checked in at night and waited about an hour, due to limited staffing overnight. If you can check in during the day, you’ll find the counter fully staffed, but more people coming and going. It’s wise to be prepared for a wait either way.

    When you arrive, pay close attention to parking signs and follow the road to the main circle right outside the lobby. If you’re traveling with multiple adults, I recommend having one adult bring the kids inside and get in line to check in while the other parks the car and brings in the bags.

    The lobby is huge, and there’s plenty of space for kids to move around under your supervision while you wait. A gift shop is directly opposite from the check-in counter, and restrooms are nearby, as well.

    You can briefly pull up to the entrance to unload everyone, but vehicles cannot be parked unattended in the circle. To park, you’ll pull a parking ticket from bar gate on the far side of the circle. Parking costs about $15 per vehicle per day, and you will receive more information on this when you check in.

    Keep a sharp eye out for children and other vehicles as you navigate the parking lot.


    Pick a Cozy Cabin Suite for Booking

    Great Wolf Lodge offers standard, themed, and premium suites. All of these are designed with families in mind, and both standard and themed suites generally accommodate 4-6 guests. If you can spare the expense, themed suites really bring an added feel of magic to your trip.

    We stayed in a themed KidCabin Suite and loved it. We were able to stay in the same room as our kids, while a dividing wall gave the sense that we each had our own space. Our children loved the bunk beds under murals of woodland creatures, and our bed sat beneath a large mural of the forest. We each had our own TV with cable, too, which let us wind down with a family movie at night.

    Great Wolf Lodge in LaGrange, GAGreat Wolf Lodge in LaGrange, GA

    Premium suites incorporate the same fun feel as themed rooms, but offer significantly more space for groups with 6 to 12 guests. These are great options for larger families or multiple families traveling together.

    Pricing is variable, but generally speaking, we found standard suites starting at about $250/night and rates went up from there. For the greatest affordability, watch the website or join the Voyagers Club, a free loyalty program, to find out about seasonal deals and packages.


    Purchase Passes for Add-On Attractions

    All overnight visits to Great Wolf Lodge include access to the indoor water park, seasonal programming like Snowland, and free daily activities for children. However, if you stop there, you will be missing so much that this resort has to offer. There are many add-on GWL attractions, including a ropes course, climbing wall, gem mining, mini-golf, bowling, arcade, MagiQuest, and Build-A-Bear.

    Look into Great Wold Lodge deals and packages when booking your stay to find the most affordable combos, or take the simple route and plan to add one of three available passes for each family member to join in the fun!

    Option 1: Pup Pass

    The Pup Pass costs about $50 and is best for toddlers and little kids. It includes…

    • One Build-A-Bear
    • $5 for the arcade
    • One small candy cup
    • One kid-sized ice cream

    Option 2: Paw Pass

    The Paw Pass costs about $60 and is best for kids and teens. It includes…

    • One set of swim goggles
    • One MagiQuest game + wand
    • $5 for the arcade
    • One small candy cup
    • One kid-sized ice cream

    Option 3: Wolf Pass

    The Wolf Pass costs about $70 and is best for older kids, teens, and adults. It includes…

    • One game of mini-golf
    • One game of bowling
    • One round on the ropes course
    • Double admission to the climbing wall
    • One MagiQuest game + wand
    • $5 for the arcade
    • One small candy cup
    • One kid-sized ice cream

    Keep in mind that some of these attractions do have height or clothing restrictions, like closed-toed shoes, so be sure to check on any requirements before purchasing passes.


    What to Expect for Each Attraction

    With so many attractions, you might be wonder what’s worth the investment. With only a quick weekend in LaGrange, we were unable to experience them all, but we’ve done some research and found out as much as we can to help you out!

    Add-On Attractions at Great Wolf Lodge in LaGrange

    Northern Lights Arcade

    We had the chance to visit the Northern Lights Arcade, which we found to be great for all ages. They had a decent range of games, including a crane machine, racing games, and the Jurassic Park shooter game.

    The arcade makes for an easy break between other activities, and we spent about a half hour in this area just using the credits that were on our passes. If you have any sensory-sensitive children, just be mindful of the flashing lights and loud noises that are typical for these kinds of spaces.

    Included in the Pup, Paw, and Wolf Passes. If you do not purchase a pass, pricing varies by game. Credits are purchased and loaded onto a card, and then different games charge different credits. This will vary based on the games you choose, but we found that the $5 on our passes covered about 3 games each.

    MagiQuest

    MagiQuest was our children’s favorite activity other than the indoor water park, and from what we hear, it is one of the most popular attractions anywhere it’s offered. Participants receive a magic wand, and the wand operates as their game controller at stations dispersed throughout the whole resort. Everywhere you look in Great Wolf Lodge, you will find kids waving their wands and finding that decorations light up and talk in response to their gestures.

    Our children could have easily spent the entire weekend playing MagiQuest if we’d let them. They spent the better part of a day playing it every chance they could, and still did not even complete a quarter of the full game experience available. This is the kind of game that you play as the opportunity arises, and you bring your wands back on every future visit to get farther in your quest.

    Included in the Paw and Wolf Passes. If you do not purchase a pass, this attraction starts at about $20 per wand plus about $15 for a game for each participant.

    Ten Paw Alley

    If you have ever wanted to try bowling with your kids, Ten Paw Alley is a great way to introduce them to the experience. It is designed for all ages to enjoy, even toddlers, with shorter lanes and lighter bowling balls that make it easier than your typical bowling alley. Bumpers are also available upon request.

    Included in the Wolf Pass only. If you do not purchase a pass, this attraction starts at about $7 for one round of bowling or $25 for family admission (one round per person for up to 6 people).

    Howl in One Mini-Golf

    Putt-putt is the perfect addition to any family vacation, and the folks at Great Wolf Lodge didn’t forget it! More elaborate than your typical putt-putt course, the themed 9-hole miniature golf course at Howl in One Mini-Golf gives your kids the chance to play through giant animal figures, sand traps, and other fun obstacles. It fits well within the greater Great Wolf Lodge woodland theme and is a fun way to enjoy the immersive experience of the hotel.

    Included in the Wolf Pass only. If you do not purchase a pass, this attraction starts at about $10 per round or $25 for family admission (one round per person for up to 6 people).

    Rustic Ridge Climbing Wall

    The Rustic Ridge Climbing Wall gives kids and adults the chance to burn off energy in a more physical environment. Harnessed climbers can choose from multiple routes with varying difficulty, making it accessible for beginners while still fun for older kids and more experienced climbers. Staff members provide harnesses and supervision for safety, which makes it a great place for families to climb together.

    Included in the Wolf Pass only. If you do not purchase a pass, this attraction starts at about $10 for single admission or $25 for family admission. Minimum height and maximum weight restrictions apply, and closed-toed shoes with rubber soles are required.

    Howlers Peak Ropes Course

    Howlers Peak Ropes Course challenges kids to navigate bridges, obstacles, and balance elements while securely harnessed. This attraction is best suited for older children and teens who are comfortable with heights and enjoy a physical challenge. This ropes course reaches to the upper floors of the resort with a straight view down to the ground, so it is best for confident family members who are up for a challenge.

    Included in the Wolf Pass only. If you do not purchase a pass, this attraction starts at about $15 per climb or $45 for family admission (one climb per person for up to 6 people). Minimum height and maximum weight restrictions apply, and closed-toed shoes with rubber soles are required.

    Build-A-Bear Workshop

    Build-A-Bear is a nationwide chain offering a creative, hands-on experience where kids can personalize and assemble their own stuffed animal. This quieter, slower-paced activity is great for younger family members and those who might need a break from the more intense sensory experiences in some of the other attractions. It’s an especially fun way to get souvenir sets for siblings, as each child gets to design their own stuffed animal alongside each other.

    Included in the Pup Pass only. If you do not purchase a pass, this attraction starts at about $35 for a furry friend, $10 for an outfit, plus more for additional accessories.

    Oliver’s Mining Co.

    Oliver’s Mining Co. is a gemstone mining experience where kids purchase a bag of dirt and sift it in water to discover polished stones and fossils. It’s simple, engaging, and works well for a wide range of ages, especially kids who enjoy hands-on discovery activities. If you’ve got a kid who’s a collector—you know who we mean, the kids who are determined to pocket a rock on every outing and put it on their bookshelf—then don’t let them miss out on this classic attraction!

    Not included with any passes. This attraction starts at about $15 for a single bag and about $35 for a family bag.


    Levels of Fun at the Indoor Water Park

    The indoor water park is the core of the Great Wolf Lodge experience, and access is included with every overnight stay. Day passes are also available for purchase if you are not staying at the resort, but these must be booked in advance and are not available for same-day use.

    We spent several hours at the indoor water park, and it was a huge hit for all our kids. The space includes a variety of themed areas for different ages and kinds of play. My favorite was the large, multi-level set of playgrounds called Fort Mackenzie and Whooping Hollow at the center of the water park.

    My youngest loved the Cub Paw Pool, a wading area with small slides for smaller family members. My oldest adored the water slides, and there were many! You’ll also find a wave pool, obstacle course, and a semi-lazy river.

    Safety is critical for kids around the water, so here are a few things we recommend doing first, as soon as you walk into the water park:

    • Find the nearest life jacket station, and buckle your kids into appropriately sized life jackets.
    • Visit the measuring station at the foot of the biggest slides, where your kids will receive color-coded bracelets based on their heights to clearly indicate what they can (and cannot) ride.
    • Find the age-appropriate play areas for each of your children, and plan to supervise children at all times. Children should not be left to play unattended in any part of the water park.

    We were also very happy to see vigilant lifeguards on duty throughout the park.

    If you’d like to enjoy an extended session at the water park, consider booking one of Great Wolf Lodge’s cozy cabanas. There are many available options, with most overlooking the wave pool, a couple more towards the middle of the water park, and a special birthday cabana conveniently located between the Cub Paw Pool and giant slides.

    Great Wolf Lodge in LaGrange, GAGreat Wolf Lodge in LaGrange, GA

    We got to check out the birthday cabana and loved the comfort, convenience, and privacy it offered. On top of that, our kids loved the Happy Birthday button, which they could push to shoot smoke out of the top of the cabana and play birthday music inside!

    Wherever you set up, we recommend laying out towels and then putting important belongings in one of the available lockers to rent. It’s helpful to arrive when the water park opens to secure your spot, grab some towels, and enjoy the space before it gets too crowded for the day.


    Seasonal Fun at Snowland

    All the attractions at Great Wolf Lodge in LaGrange are available year-round, but we were so excited to visit during their annual Snowland Celebration! This unique seasonal offering transforms the entire lodge into a winter wonderland with a host of holiday activities from about Thanksgiving to New Years.

    On our visit, we found a Christmas dance party underway with “snow” bubbles falling from the ceiling and holiday music blasting through the speakers. Santa paid special visits to his throne in the lobby, and we passed families playing holiday-themed Bingo and making holiday crafts. All of us especially enjoyed the free hot chocolate bar after exploring the surrounding town in cold weather.

    When you check in, you can request a schedule of holiday events for your stay, or you can find events posted daily on signs in the lobby.


    Dining Options in the Lodge

    You don’t need to leave the resort for meals, and there are plenty of options to suit every appetite.

    During our stay, we shared a pizza from Hungry As a Wolf, which serves family-sized meals including pizza, pasta, and salad. We also grabbed food to go from Buckets Burgers & Bites, which offers classic burgers, chicken tenders, and fries. My husband couldn’t resist Timbers Tacos, with flavorful tacos, quesadillas, and nachos.

    Other on-location choices include Campfire Kitchen for breakfast, Barnwood for upscale dining, Freshwoods Market for grab-and-go meals and snacks, Wood’s End Creamery for ice cream, and Great Wolf Candy Company for a wide assortment of chocolates and more. There’s even a Dunkin’ Donuts for coffee, pastries, and quick breakfast items.

    Just be aware that food pricing inside the resort is very convenient, but very expensive. For more budget-friendly options, consider packing some easy snacks and sandwiches, or venture into LaGrange to check out the local dining scene. We highly recommend Milano’s for an authentic Italian dinner while you’re in town!


    Exploring LaGrange

    Even with all the fun to be had at Great Wolf Lodge, it is truly just the tip of the iceberg for family fun in LaGrange. This charming city combines small-town warmth with historic elegance, and during the holidays, it feels like something out of a Hallmark movie.

    Downtown LaGrange is perfect for wandering, with unique shops, cozy bookstores, and toy-filled boutiques. You’ll even find a romantic fountain and a statue of General Lafayette, giving the city a storybook feel that’s perfect for families.

    You can enjoy seasonal ice skating at Sweetland on Ice, explore the beautiful Hills & Dales Estate, or get up close with animals at the nearby Wild Animal Safari. The greater LaGrange area is packed with opportunities to find adventure and make memories as a family, not to mention some great photo ops!

    With Great Wolf Lodge as your home base, you can explore, play, and make memories in LaGrange, Georgia that will last long after the holiday lights have come down.


    A Howling Good Time Awaits!

    Between the themed suites, holiday programming, indoor water park, and countless activities, Great Wolf Lodge is a destination all its own. You could easily spend your entire trip without ever leaving the resort—but when you’re ready to explore more of LaGrange, there’s so much to discover. Whether you spend every moment at the lodge or venture into the charming city of LaGrange, your family is in for an unforgettable getaway.



    Georgia Travel Guide: Family getaways in GeorgiaGeorgia Travel Guide: Family getaways in Georgia

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    Sarah Burnett

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  • My daughters, KPop Demon Hunters, and radical acceptance

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    By Anchel Krishna

    Like the parents of most eight-year-olds, our movie nights have been dominated by KPop Demon Hunters. I was expecting the film to be just another kids’ movie. Instead, it was a movie that got my daughter Nal and I thinking about identity, belonging and the beauty in embracing your full self. Also, I didn’t expect to find myself singing along to the movie’s songs at full volume while driving alone (if you pull up beside me at a red light, please don’t judge me!).

    KPop Demon Hunters is an animated film about a girl group who are global music stars and secret demon hunters. It follows Rumi, the group’s leader, who hides that she is half demon from her two closest friends and the public, while trying to maintain a perfect image. When her secret begins to surface, she must choose between continuing to live a lie or fully accepting who she is. The film explores identity, friendship and the idea that our differences can be sources of strength rather than weaknesses.

    That message hit close to home as a parent who spends so much time navigating two worlds. There is the world where the messy, jagged edges of disability shape our experience. And it’s hard. Sometimes it feels easier to only show the smooth edges of our life to people who don’t live in the disability world, to only reveal the parts that they can easily understand.

    When I was watching the movie and feeling all of my feels, I looked over at Nal. She was as engrossed as I was, and I wondered if this had her thinking along the same lines. She navigates a complex world as a sibling of a sister with a disability. She has many close friends who truly accept and embrace her sister Syona, alongside Nal. But Nal has often expressed how she feels alone in her experience, too, saying: “I have a sister, like other kids, but my sister is not like other sisters.” It’s a simple way to explain her life, but poignantly accurate. 

    Everything shifts near the end of the film when Rumi can’t keep hiding part of herself. And that is where my favourite song comes in. What It Sounds Like manages to be a banger with lyrics that made me feel seen:  

    Nothing but the truth now 
    Nothing but the proof of what I am… 

    We broke into a million pieces, and we can’t go back 
    But now I’m seeing all the beauty in the broken glass 
    The scars are part of me, darkness and harmony 
    My voice without the lies, this is what it sounds like… 

    This life we’ve built raising one daughter with disabilities and one without has to be based on truth. The proof of our challenges is very visible and real, and yet in it we have found strength and purpose.  

    The song ends with this: 

    Fearless and undefined, this is what it sounds like 
    Truth after all this time, our voices all combined 
    When darkness meets the light, this is what it sounds like 

    This life that we’ve built has space for Nal to acknowledge and voice her experience as a sibling in a safe and supportive space. Together we share our experiences, and that brings them to the surface for all of us. We all experience post-traumatic growth together, finding meaning and strength through our challenges. 

    At the end of the movie we danced, I cried, and we talked about the lessons we were taking away: about radical acceptance of exactly who you are in that moment, and leaning on those who love you most.  

    We also talked about how much we wished the film had included more explicit representation of characters with disabilities. While many people online have suggested that Zoey, one of the members of the trio, may be autistic or have ADHD, it would have been so powerful to see that woven into the story in an intentional and authentic way. 

    My daughter Syona doesn’t watch TV or movies because of her visual processing disorder, which makes representation even more complicated in our house. But visible inclusion for kids who move through the world with different needs, strengths and disabilities matters deeply. Showing how they add value exactly as they are helps everyone understand that people with disabilities are not on the margins or an afterthought. They are woven into our day-to-day experiences and pop-culture references. Syona deserves to see characters like herself in mainstream stories like this, and Nal deserves to see characters like her sister. There is space for everyone in these stories. 

    That longing for representation is really about connection. This film reminded me that healing and growth happen when we stop hiding parts of ourselves and let others in. It is not always comfortable, but it is how we raise kids who understand that every person carries their own “darkness and harmony,” and that all of those patterns belong. 

    For anyone parenting a child with a disability, or those learning to accept parts of themselves they have kept tucked away, I hope you remember this: You do not need to seal anything off to belong. You deserve to show your full self. Those who see your value will be the ones you want surrounding you. When you reveal who you truly are, your voice might become stronger. It might even sound exactly the way it was always meant to. 
     

     

    Like this content? Sign up for our monthly BLOOM e-letter, follow BLOOM editor @LouiseKinross on X, or watch our A Family Like Mine video series. 

     

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  • Want a holiday trip packed with cozy charm + big fun? LaGrange, GA

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    Holidays in LaGrange, GA: things to do, family trip

    Discover holiday magic in LaGrange, Georgia—where historic downtown charm meets family-friendly adventures like Sweetland on Ice, Hills & Dales Estate, and the nearby Wild Animal Safari. Whether you’re visiting for the holidays or any other time of year, LaGrange offers cozy shops, rich history, and special seasonal fun for families.

    Thanks to Visit LaGrange for hosting us so we could bring all these fun adventures to our readers.


    Plan Your Holiday Getaway: LaGrange, GA
    📍 LaGrange in West Georgia
    🏡 Family-friendly attractions in a charming town with a cozy, Hallmark feel around the holidays
    🐾 Accommodations & adventure at Great Wolf Lodge
    ⛸️ Seasonal ice-skating rink on weekends in winter
    🪴Family-friendly estate & gardens with scavenger hunt
    ✝️ Biblical history center with immersive exhibits and seasonal events
    🛍️  Delightful local shopping and dining scene
    ⚠️ Plan your itinerary ahead of time to avoid missing anything that interests your family, as open hours and ticket availability for all attractions, businesses, and restaurants may be limited.


    Get to Know LaGrange

    The origin story of LaGrange, Georgia tells you so much about the feel of this city. Before it was incorporated in the early 1800s, General Marquis de Lafayette of France visited the area and said it reminded him of his family estate abroad, then known as La Grange.” The city maintains the feel of a countryside escape even today, and when you visit downtown, you will find a statue of Lafayette overlooking a large, romantic fountain in the city center.


    We took some time to explore downtown LaGrange, and there were several little shops for families to enjoy. Every shop has a unique feel and personality, and it’s easy to spend a couple of hours just wandering from shop to shop to see what you might discover!

    Top Shops in Downtown LaGrange, GA

    Our favorite was Pretty Good Books, which caught our attention with quirky signs that book-lovers will appreciate. Housed in the oldest non-residential building in the city, the shop is even featured on the local ghost tour. It offers new and used books, with a dedicated room for children’s books upstairs. We loved the mural and toys that made this a great space for kids to cozy up with a book or play while parents pick out some options.

    Other shopping highlights include Solomon’s Department Store, opened by an immigrant from Lebanon with his family nearly 100 years ago. Today, they offer clothing and shoes for men, women, and children in their attractive downtown store. For the kids, you’ll find Buddy’s Comics is a treasure trove of board games, card games, and comics. The Medicine Cabinet sells toys and gifts for the whole family, and even offers an old-fashioned Soda Shoppe with counter-service milkshakes and glass ice cream dishes.


    Downtown Attractions and Experiences

    While we enjoyed walking from shop to shop, we also found easy parking all over downtown. We decided to drive around to see what attractions were in the area, and we found a few worth highlighting for families.

    Things To Do in Downtown LaGrange, GA

    Sweetland on Ice

    When visiting in the winter, you will not want to miss Sweetland on Ice, a temporary covered ice-skating rink in the heart of downtown LaGrange. Open only on weekends for the general public and for private parties during the week, the rink is beautifully decorated and has skates available to rent, plus concessions for sale.

    We found convenient restrooms onsite, plenty of seating around the ice-skating rink, and multiple warming stations. They even had skate helpers, which allowed our toddler to join us on the ice without fear of falling. We recommend checking their website for special events, too, like their holiday movie nights or New Year’s Eve party.

    Sweetland Amphitheatre

    It’s also worth checking the event calendar for the Sweetland Amphitheatre, a 2,500-seat outdoor amphitheatre where you might be able to catch musicians and other performances throughout the year. We caught a beautiful sunset over the amphitheatre while visiting Sweetland on Ice, and it made us look forward to catching a show there once the weather gets warmer!

    LaGrange Art Museum

    On future visits, we hope to explore the LaGrange Art Museum. Even the artwork on the exterior of the building caught our eye, and we wished we had the chance to go inside and experience it. We’ve been told the exhibits are family-friendly, and they offer a range of kid-focused events and activities, including family-focused events every third Saturday of the month. Admission is free, and the museum is open Tuesday through Saturday.


    Find Family-Friendly Adventures

    If you’re looking for a greater sense of adventure, we found some seriously awesome attractions to get you out and exploring with your family! These are guaranteed memory-makers, so make sure there’s room on your camera roll before setting out, and be prepared to spend several hours at any one of these.

    Things to Do with Kids in LaGrange, GA

    Biblical History Center

    On the west side of town, discover the extraordinary Biblical History Center, open only Tuesdays through Saturdays. Of all the places we would have loved to visit if we’d had more time, this one would have been top of the list! Tour the center with your children to discover the Archaeological Replica Garden, an immersive walk-through experience with life-sized replicas of ancient Biblical structures based on modern-day archaeology. During the holidays, they also offer an extraordinary Nativity Tour with a live Nativity presentation.

    Hills & Dales Estate

    My favorite attraction in LaGrange was the Hills & Dales Estate. Coming from the Carolinas, it reminded me of Biltmore Estate in Asheville, but this estate is smaller with a much stronger emphasis on family ties and values. I loved watching the mini-documentary at the start of the tour, which outlined how the estate came into existence over three generations of loving marriages and family bonds:

    • Blount and Sarah Ferrell originally planted the estate as Ferrell Gardens, with their Christian faith coming through as they planted boxwoods arranged to spell out God’s name at the garden entrance and “God is love” on the main terrace.
    • Fuller and Ida Callaway acquired the land after the passing of the Ferrells, to whom they were close friends. They preserved the gardens and built their family home there, renaming it Hills & Dales Estate after the gorgeous hills and dales all over the property.
    • Their sons, Cason and Fuller Callaway Jr., married a set of sisters, Virginia (Cason’s wife) and Alice (Fuller Jr.’s wife), and built houses on either side of their childhood home. Fuller Jr. eventually came into ownership of Hills & Dales Estate, and Cason went on to develop the nearby Callaway Gardens property in Pine Mountain, Georgia.

    My tour guide was a delightfully knowledgeable volunteer named Mr. Gregory, who worked professionally as a librarian for many years and has catalogued many things for the estate. My favorite sights on the tour were the living area at the bottom of the grand staircase, beautifully decorated for Christmas, and the formal dining room. I was delighted by the unique décor in each of the bedrooms, too, which were coordinated with extraordinary precision down to the tiniest details.

    A major highlight for children is the Home & Garden Scavenger Hunt, available for pickup at the Visitor’s Center before you ride a shuttle up to the main house. This hunt turns the entire tour into a giant seek-and-find experience, and your kids are sure to search eagerly for every curiosity pictured on the scavenger hunt!

    Mr. Gregory led me through the garage where a wreath-making workshop was just wrapping up, the greenhouse where I saw so many things in bloom even in the thick of winter, and every level of the beautiful outdoor gardens. The documentary at the start the tour grants you eyes to see the garden as its founders saw it, and while I loved seeing the various plants in different stages of growth, my personal highlight was finding the bench where one of the couples are said to have fallen in love.

    Callaway Gardens

    While we did not have enough time to visit it on this trip, the nearby Callaway Gardens in Pine Mountain is a family favorite. Located less than half an hour from LaGrange, you’ll find miles of hiking and biking trails through the gardens, plus a lake to enjoy during warmer seasons. In the winter, Fantasy in Lights is a fantastic drive-through experience with themed holiday light displays stretching across the 2,500-acre gardens. There is even a walk-through Christmas Village, with a large holiday gift shop and character meet-and-greets like Santa and the Abominable Snowman.

    Wild Animal Safari

    Also in nearby Pine Mountain, you can enjoy Wild Animal Safari, offering both a walk-through and drive-through petting zoo experience with exotic animals like zebras, bison, and giraffes! You’ll have the opportunity to hand-feed the animals and take pictures with them. We even got pictures with peacocks that were wandering the parking lot on one visit!

    For the drive-through experience, you can either take your personal vehicle, rent a zebra car, or ride on one of the zebra tour buses through the safari park. Driving a car through the park allows you to go at your own pace, but your personal vehicle can be easily damaged as there are no barriers separating the animals from your car. Because they are used to being hand-fed from vehicles, they will come right up and stick their faces in your windows! And those longhorns? Trust me, you don’t want to take your own car through there. I highly recommend renting a zebra car!


    Taste Your Way Around LaGrange

    The dining scene in LaGrange is one we could have spent much more time exploring, but what we did get to taste was stellar. And don’t worry, if you’ve got picky eaters, this place has its share of chain restaurants, too!

    Family-Friendly Places to Eat in LaGrange, GA

    If you are looking for a more familiar place to eat as a family, then feel free to check out the Cracker Barrell, Waffle House, or Chick-Fil-A within the city of LaGrange, too.

    Lunch at Great Wolf Lodge

    Combine food and fun by adding a visit to Great Wolf Lodge to your itinerary! This combined hotel and resort offers day pass bundles for their built-in attractions, including an indoor water park, ropes course, mini-golf, arcade, MagiQuest, and even more. You can also find a variety of in-resort dining options like family-sized pizzas from Hungry As A Wolf, tacos and quesadillas from Timbers Tacos, and classic American grub from Buckets Burgers & Bites. Just be advised that food pricing inside the resort is very expensive.

    For more affordable and local lunch options, consider Charlie Joseph’s counter-service diner or Trios Cantina for authentic Mexican cuisine in a family-friendly setting.

    Our server was a wonderful young man named Mr. Jackson, and we enjoyed some of the very best food and customer service we’ve had in a very long time. Pricing was very affordable, and the portion sizes were incredibly generous. We each ate as much as we could and still walked out with more leftovers than we could finish! There’s also a display case full of irresistible cakes made in-house which you can purchase by the slice, so plan to enjoy dessert at the table or order some on your way out like we did.

    There are many other local spots to try for dinner, but we had such a fantastic experience at Milano’s Pizza that I am not even going to name them, in case you might miss out on trying this one first!


    Choose the Perfect Hotel for Your Holiday

    There are many places to stay in LaGrange, but we found a couple that should be top of the list for families planning a holiday vacation in the area.

    Top Places to Stay in LaGrange, GA

    Courtyard Marriott

    If you love the Hallmark feel of LaGrange and want to continue that cozy, upscale feeling when you’re ready to rest, then I recommend booking your stay with Courtyard Marriott in the middle of historic downtown. This hotel offers the comfort and quality we’ve come to expect from Marriott, plus a 24/7 bistro with Starbucks coffee.

    Great Wolf Lodge

    If you want your accommodations to bring another whole level of fun and adventure to your family vacation, then I recommend taking your trip to the next level by staying at Great Wolf Lodge. This combined hotel and resort offers standard, themed, and premium suites, plus endless fun at built-in attractions. All overnight packages include access to their indoor water park, and additional packages and passes are available for access to the ropes course, mini-golf, arcade, MagiQuest, and other attractions.

    If you’ve stayed at a Great Wolf Lodge in the past, then you might be interested to know that we had multiple readers reach out to tell us that this location is their absolute favorite!


    Get Started on Your Vacation!

    LaGrange is the perfect holiday destination for families, combining historic downtown charm, seasonal attractions, and fun-filled accommodations like Great Wolf Lodge. With so many local attractions, nearby adventures, and amazing dining and shopping, families have endless opportunities to make memories on a truly relaxing vacation. How often do you find that?

    For more information about all that LaGrange, GA has to offer, check out Visit LaGrange.


    More Photos of LaGrange, GA


    Georgia Travel Guide: Family getaways in GeorgiaGeorgia Travel Guide: Family getaways in Georgia

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  • Gift Guide 2025: Gifts for the person who has everything

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    There’s something so tricky about finding a gift for that person who seems to have it all and want for nothing. We’ve got you covered. Here are some super cool gifts that are fun, interesting, unique, and indulgent… just because.

    The next evolution of Nintendo Switch systems, the Nintendo Switch 2, is here! With powerful processing speeds and a bigger, brighter screen, players can enjoy enhanced visuals, either with some of the new Nintendo Switch 2 games or compatible games from their existing Nintendo Switch libraries. The reimagined Joy-Con 2 controllers snap on magnetically and can even function as a mouse in compatible games, adding a new level of precision and play. And with GameChat, you can stay connected like never before. 

    The Brother P-touch PT-N10 Personal Handheld Label Maker is designed to help anyone easily personalize their world and organize practically everything in it. With a full QWERTY keyboard, typing personalized messages is familiar, fast, and fun, and the easy-to-read 12-character display screen lets you preview label text before you print. Plus, this convenient handheld label maker is battery operated so you can transport it wherever your labelling needs take you. 

    Who doesn’t dream about taking to the skies and being a pilot? Now you can with AviaSim, a one-of-a-kind simulation experience. Sit in a real cockpit alongside a professional flight instructor, take off from one of the 24,000 departure and arrival airports, and take in the incredible 180-degree views from thousands of feet in the air.

    The Epson Lifestudio Pop Plus Projector brings families together and is a great investment for the entire household. It comes with a built-in Google TV, sound by Bose technology, and a 4K PRO-UHD picture. The whole family can have a legendary watching experience as they cuddle up on the couch to watch holiday movies on over 10,000 streaming apps. From casual, cozy evenings to festive family gatherings, it transforms a simple wall into a big-screen cinematic moment (both indoors and outdoors).

    The Philips Sonicare Compact Flosser 1000Oral Irrigator is all about effective flossing in just 60 seconds. It’s fast, effective, and ready to take anywhere, and removes up to 99.9% of plaque from between your teeth and along your gumline in just one minute.

    The new Guinness World Records Gamers Edition is out and is the perfect gift for just about anyone. From the crew of Mass Effect to the Creepers of Minecraft, see where the biggest and best characters ranked. You’ll find timeless icons like Nintendo superstars Mario and Link, beloved Tomb Raider heroine Lara Croft, and heroes whose stories transcend time and reality. Explore their incredible stories, groundbreaking achievements, and fan-favourite moments.

    Another universally great title is Guinness World Records 2026. From yellow giant objects to spooky ghost towns, jaw-dropping nature and human heroes, the new edition of the Guinness World Records brings you the brightest, biggest, and loudest in record-breaking.

    The Yankee Candle 3 Pack Holiday Mini Gift Set comes with three seasonal scents: Balsam & Cedar, Sparkling Cinnamon, and Christmas Cookie. It’s a charming gift that brings warmth and comfort to any space, whether you’re hosting or simply enjoying quiet moments at home. 

    For the person who has it all (or the family that loves to watch together), Fubo offers an unbeatable mix of live sports, entertainment, and news, all in one place. From exclusive coverage of the Premier League and Serie A, to live action from the NFL, NHL, NBA, and MLB, there’s always something to cheer for. And when it’s not game time, viewers can enjoy popular channels like CBC, HGTV, and Food Network. Subscribers can stream on any device, anywhere, with unlimited DVR, 4K resolution, and Multiview on Roku, making it a seamless experience for every fan. 

    The LEGO Creator 3 in 1 Retro Camera Toy transforms from a toy camera to a retro video camera to a retro TV set – that’s three retro toys in one box. Kids and kids at heart can build and rebuild three different pieces of vintage technology using the same set of bricks. 

    Ravensburger puzzles are great for anyone to enjoy, either by putting it together on their own or as a family. Their Christmas Slopeside Spirit puzzle by artist Greg Paprocki creates a beautiful and magical holiday scene everyone will love.

    Stranger Things: Catalyst is an immersive VR experience that stars Matthew Modine as Dr. ‘Papa’ Brenner and allows fans to step inside the global phenomenon series in an all-new immersive chapter that puts you at the heart of Hawkins’ darkest secrets. Become Dr. Brenner’s test subjects and explore the sinister halls of Hawkins Lab, the eerie glow of the Rainbow Room, the shadow-haunted woods of Mirkwood, and the nightmarish Upside Down. Fight like Eleven using your incredible telekinetic powers to hurl objects, crush obstacles, and fight back against supernatural threats like Demobats, Demodogs and even the terrifying Demogorgon. You’ve binged the show, now brave the Upside Down.

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    By: Jennifer Cox The Suburban

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  • “7 Ways to Parent in the Age of Brain Rot”

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    Almost without exception, parents tell me the same story: Meltdowns, yelling, and door-slamming the moment their teen is forced to quit their video game, log off TikTok, or otherwise disengage with their preferred form of “brain rot.” The explosive reactions happen again and again, even after conversations and apologies for past transgressions.

    This behavior may look like defiance, but I argue that it’s a sign of dopamine withdrawal. No, that’s not far-fetched. We know that short-form content — think TikTok, YouTube Shorts, Instagram Reels — is carefully engineered to activate the brain’s dopamine centers.1 We also know that excessive consumption of short-form content is linked to poorer attention, depression, anxiety, stress, and loneliness. Difficulty disengaging and regulating emotions offline is a common result.2

    It stands to reason that youth with ADHD, whose brains are wired for novelty and stimulation, and who have difficulty regulating, feel the effects of these digital dopamine hits (and withdrawals) more intensely.

    📱 Read: Why Screens Mesmerize Our Teens — and How to Break the Trance

    So, what can you do to release the latest brain rot’s hold over your child? Once you understand how dopamine drives your child’s reactions, the next step is to guide that chemistry instead of fight it. The strategies below will help your child regain calm and control and build healthier reward patterns.

    1. The Power-Down Countdown

    “Five more minutes” doesn’t mean much to ADHD brains. Visuals say a lot more. Try color-changing timers, countdown apps, or lamps that fade from green to red to signal that it’s almost time to switch away from screens. You can even turn it into a challenge: Log off before the light turns red to earn more allowance.

    2. Dopamine Down Shift

    Abruptly shutting off a heavy stream of dopamine destabilizes ADHD brains. Instead, move your child into a dopamine replacement activity that is short, satisfying, and active. That can be shooting a few baskets, racing around the living room, drawing for five minutes, or solving a short puzzle — anything will do, if it’s a real-world activity that reinforces to kids that stimulation is possible outside of digital realms.

    3. Cool Down Bridge

    To further help your child’s brain transition, try a cool down bridge — a short sensory ritual — to help soften the landing off devices. Some kids pace while listening to a favorite song, others stretch or splash cold water on their face. It doesn’t matter what the in-between activity is, only that it signals to the brain that it is time to switch gears to a calmer state.

    🕹️ Read: An “Ethics Manual” for Your Teen’s Electronics

    4. Collaborative Control Plans

    Chances are that your teen doesn’t want to have meltdowns, either. When your child is calm, invite them to help you come up with a plan to transition away from screens and devices. Ask, “What would help you stop without becoming too upset?” or “How could we make this easier next time?” Ownership builds cooperation.

    5. Dopamine Diversity Days

    Make one day each week a screen-break day. Go hiking, cook together, build something, or play music. Try not to frame the day as a loss, but as something your family is gaining. Say, “We’re giving our brains a different kind of fuel today.”

    6. Reclaim Dopamine Autonomy

    The goal is not to eliminate games, screens, or content from your teen’s life. It is to help them understand what certain forms of content do to their brain, health, and ability to stay in control. You can appeal to your teen’s natural desire for autonomy by talking about digital tactics that are meant to hijack their decision-making:

    “That streak is trying to trick your brain into FOMO.”

    “That timer wants you to log back in.”

    Celebrate when they skip a reward on purpose. Challenge them to see missing a “daily login” as proof of control.

    7. Examine Your Own Brain Rot

    Teen screen use is directly correlated with parental screen use.3 While you may not consume the same content as your child, it’s likely that your screen time could use some work. Set screen-free zones and times, such as during dinner or while doing homework. Try to keep devices out of bedrooms. Use timers and rituals to transition away from devices, too, (and make sure your child sees you doing so). Encourage ongoing, open conversations about screen use, its pros and cons, and its impact on mental health.

    Brain Rot and Teen Screen Time: Next Steps


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  • Gift Guide 2025: The best skincare gifts

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    Give the gift of great skin this holiday season with these skincare gifts, perfect for just about anyone!

    The Philips Epilator Series 8000 Wet & Dry boasts powerful yet gentle epilation with its improved tweezers and over 70,000 hair-catching actions per minute. This means you can cover more skin and achieve flawless smoothness for up to 4 weeks.

    This holiday season, Bubble makes gifting simple, fun, and affordable with its limited-edition “Silky Season” 3-Step Hydrating Routine. The set includes three of Bubble’s best-selling essentials for clean, hydrated, and glowing skin.

    Clé de Peau Beauté invites you aboard the Dreams Express, a limited-edition collection that transforms beauty into an exquisite journey of imagination and light. Inspired by a fantastical dream world, the Dreams Express Collection celebrates confidence, transformation, and the radiance that comes from within.

    Biossance’s Bright Bestsellers Set is for the radiance-obsessed, with a set that brings together Biossance’s most-loved icons: the Squalane + Vitamin C Rose Oil for instant luminosity, the Squalane + Copper Peptide Rapid Plumping Serum for bouncy, hydrated skin, and the Squalane + Omega Repair Cream for rich, replenishing moisture. It’s a routine that brightens, firms, and deeply nourishes.

    Josie Maran bite-sized butters are air-whipped, full-body moisturizers that soak in to deliver visible firmness and intense hydration. Tuck them into someone’s stocking, or wrap them up as a set.

    Peter Thomas Roth’s full-size Vitamin C and hyaluronic eye patches come in a two-piece kit that’s ideal for gift giving. The Potent-C Hydra-Gel Eye Patches help brighten and reduce signs of aging, and Water Drench Hydra-Gel Eye Patches help reduce the look of dryness, under-eye bags, and dark circles.

    The Ultimate Hydration Jet Set from Skinfix is the travel skin repair trio. The gel cleanser doubles as a makeup remover, clearing oil and SPF without stripping, a fast-absorbing water cream delivers lightweight moisture and reduces shine, and a rich cream is packed with peptides to restore ultra-dry skin.

    Summer Fridays’ The Holiday Trio Set comes with Lip Butter Balm in Hot Cocoa and Toasted Marshmallow. Nourish dull, depleted skin with a swipe of buttery hydration.

    The NYX Professional Makeup Holiday Fat Oil Trio Lip Oil Gift Set is formulated with squalane, cloudberry, and raspberry oils. They work together to deeply nourish and hydrate the lips, promoting a supple, healthy appearance.

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    By: Jennifer Cox The Suburban

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  • Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal recipe

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    Winter is the perfect time to enjoy fresh, green vegetables, and this Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal recipe is a delicious way to include them in your child’s diet! Made with iron-rich fenugreek (methi) and protein-packed green peas (mutter), this dish helps boost immunity, improve digestion, and keep little tummies warm and satisfied. Mildly spiced and perfectly balanced in flavor, it’s ideal for toddlers and kids who enjoy soft, wholesome meals. Pair it with roti, rice, or even paratha for a complete, nourishing winter treat!

    Health Benefits of Fenugreek for Kids

    1. Boosts Immunity:
      Fenugreek is rich in antioxidants that help strengthen the immune system and protect kids from common colds and infections.
    2. Improves Digestion:
      Methi aids in healthy digestion, prevents constipation, and keeps the tummy happy — especially helpful during winter.
    3. Supports Growth:
      It contains iron, calcium, and essential vitamins that support bone strength and overall growth in children.
    4. Regulates Appetite:
      Fenugreek helps balance appetite and can encourage better eating habits in fussy eaters.
    5. Keeps Kids Warm in Winter:
      Naturally warming in nature, methi helps the body stay cozy and energetic during the cold season.
    6. Maintains Healthy Blood Levels:
      The iron in fenugreek helps prevent anemia and supports healthy blood formation.

    Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids

    This Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal recipe is a delicious way to include green vegetables in your kids diet!

    Ingredients

    • Fresh methi (fenugreek) leaves – 1 cup (washed and chopped)
    • Green peas (mutter) – ½ cup
    • Onion – 1 (finely chopped)
    • Tomato – 1 (finely chopped)
    • Garlic – 2 cloves (crushed)
    • Cumin seeds – ½ tsp
    • Turmeric powder – ¼ tsp
    • Coriander powder – ½ tsp
    • Homemade ghee – 1 tbsp
    • Salt – as required
    • Water – ½ cup

    Method

    • Heat ghee in a pan. Add cumin seeds and let them splutter.
    • Add chopped onions and sauté until soft and golden.
    • Add crushed garlic and cook for a few seconds.
    • Add chopped tomatoes and cook until they turn mushy.
    • Add turmeric powder, coriander powder, and salt. Mix well.
    • Add the chopped methi leaves and cook for 2–3 minutes until they shrink.
    • Add green peas and ½ cup of water. Mix and cover with a lid.
    • Cook for about 5–7 minutes until peas are soft and the curry thickens.
    • Turn off the flame and serve warm with roti or rice.
    This Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal recipe is a delicious way to include green vegetables in your kids diet!

    This Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe is a perfect way to include greens in your child’s diet while keeping their meal tasty and wholesome. Packed with iron, protein, and fiber, it strengthens immunity and supports healthy growth — just what your little one needs during the winter months. Serve it warm with soft rotis or rice for a comforting and nourishing meal your kids will love!

    This Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal recipe is a delicious way to include green vegetables in your kids diet!
    This Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal recipe is a delicious way to include green vegetables in your kids diet!

    Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal

    This Nutritious Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids – Healthy and Tasty Winter Meal recipe is a delicious way to include green vegetables in your kids diet!

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    Course: Curry

    Cuisine: Indian

    Keyword: Methi Mutter Recipe for Kids

    Ingredients

    • 1 cup Fresh methi (fenugreek) leaves (washed and chopped)
    • ½ cup Green peas (mutter)
    • 1 Onion (finely chopped)
    • 1 Tomato (finely chopped)
    • 2 cloves Garlic (crushed)
    • ½ tsp Cumin seeds
    • ¼ tsp Turmeric powder
    • ½ tsp Coriander powder
    • 1 tbsp Homemade ghee
    • Salt – as required
    • ½ cup Water

    Instructions

    • Heat ghee in a pan. Add cumin seeds and let them splutter.

    • Add chopped onions and sauté until soft and golden.

    • Add crushed garlic and cook for a few seconds.

    • Add chopped tomatoes and cook until they turn mushy.

    • Add turmeric powder, coriander powder, and salt. Mix well.

    • Add the chopped methi leaves and cook for 2–3 minutes until they shrink.

    • Add green peas and ½ cup of water. Mix and cover with a lid.

    • Cook for about 5–7 minutes until peas are soft and the curry thickens.

    • Turn off the flame and serve warm with roti or rice.

    Frequently Asked Questions

    1. Can I give this to a 1-year-old?

    Yes, you can. Just make it less spicy and mash lightly before serving.


    2. Can I use frozen green peas?

    Frozen peas can be used if fresh ones aren’t available. Rinse them before cooking.

    3. Can I skip onions and garlic?

    Yes, you can skip them and still make a tasty version using just tomatoes and mild spices.

    4. What can I serve this curry with?

    It goes well with soft phulkas, parathas, or plain rice.

    Buy Healthy Nutritious Baby, Toddler food made by our own Doctor Mom !

    Shop now!
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  • “College Accommodations Are Not a Loophole. They Are a Civil Right.”

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    The following is a personal essay that reflects the opinion of its author.

    December 10, 2025

    As a director of disability services in higher education, I am deeply troubled by the framing and assumptions of such services in “Accommodation Nation” an article recently in The Atlantic that positions college accommodations as a burden, casts suspicion on students with disabilities, and erodes decades of progress made by disability advocates who have fought for equal access to education.

    Accommodations Are Not “Easily Gamed”

    It’s true that the number of students seeking accommodations has risen over the years as rates of diagnosed ADHD, anxiety, and other conditions have increased. But this is because diagnostic tools have improved dramatically, leading to increased identification. Increased identification is not a sign of manipulation, as The Atlantic article insinuates. It is the result of better science and long-overdue recognition.

    Yet articles like “Accommodation Nation” use these realities to cast doubt on students’ lived experiences. At my institution, students must go through multiple steps before accommodations are considered. They complete a detailed online application, provide documentation from licensed professionals that identify which major life activities are impacted by their condition(s), and outline specific functional limitations. I regularly follow up with providers to better understand the applicant’s diagnosis. Then I meet with the student to explore their needs, discuss barriers, and determine appropriate accommodations.

    Free Guide: How to Get Accommodations in College

    This is not a casual or “easily gamed” process, as The Atlantic suggests. It is a careful, legally grounded, individualized assessment rooted in education, awareness, and advocacy.

    The Right to Education, Not Exploitation

    What concerns me most about The Atlantic article is how it reinforces the false narrative that students with disabilities are inflating their needs or receiving unearned advantages. Disability services offices are not handing out “perks.” Rather, we are ensuring that students can access the same educational opportunities as their peers. That is the foundation of civil rights laws.

    The disability rights movement began in the 1960s and, before that, many individuals with disabilities were banned from education altogether. Today, that access to education translates to employment, independence, and contributions back to society. Undermining accommodations threatens to send us backward at a moment when the Department of Education itself is being dismantled and national conversations around mental health, ADHD, and neurodivergence are already steeped in stigma.

    Students with disabilities are not a burden. They are welcome at the table of higher education.

    Read: 4 Hallmarks of ADHD-Supportive Colleges

    Accessibility Is Not a Loophole

    One in four Americans lives with a disability. At my small college, roughly 25% of students are registered with disability services; I suspect there are another 10% who would qualify, but choose not to come forward because of stigma. Smaller schools often attract students seeking supportive, high-touch environments, and many students come to our offices only after years of struggling without assistance. For some, college is the first time they have access to health insurance, counseling services, and the availability of diagnostic testing.

    On that note, the Atlantic article also ignores pressing questions about youth mental health. Beyond increased awareness and better diagnostic tools, why are today’s young people experiencing higher rates of trauma  and mental health challenges? Could it have anything to do with the fact that today’s college students — who have grown up with active-shooter drills, unfettered access to largely unregulated social media platforms, and who are entering adulthood in an economically unstable, politically volatile, and rapidly changing world — have endured circumstances no previous cohort has faced?

    Ultimately, “Accommodation Nation” fails to acknowledge that an increase in student support does not signal abuse. It shows that students finally feel safe enough to seek services to bolster their education. It signals progress. At a time when students with disabilities already navigate bias, skepticism, and physical and attitudinal barriers, we do not need narratives that delegitimize their existence or imply their success is suspicious.

    We need investment, compassion, and the understanding that accessibility is not a loophole, but a civil right. We should be examining why students need support, not doubting whether they deserve it. We should be investing in and expanding accessibility, not undermining it. And we should be building universities that see disability not as an inconvenience, but as a natural and valuable part of the human experience.

    Jillian Lillibridge Heilman, Ph.D., CRC, is a disability expert with more than 20 years of experience in disability education and advocacy. She is the Director of Student Accessibility Services at a small New England college and provides training to other colleges and private organizations that seek to better serve individuals with disabilities.

    College Accommodations: More Resources


    SUPPORT ADDITUDE
    Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you.

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    Nathaly Pesantez

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  • How to Add Magic to the Holidays: 7 Traditions for Families With Teens

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    There’s nothing like the magic of the holidays with little ones. Sadly, once our kids stop believing in Santa and start sleeping in on Christmas morning, it can feel like all the magic is gone. This time of year, parents of big kids sometimes feel a little wistful and long for the days when  joy and wonder filled our homes for weeks.

    Even though we can never totally recapture those precious days, with a little creativity, there are a few holiday traditions your family can adopt to bring a sense of wonder back to the holidays. 

    Holiday traditions that will delight your big kids

    1. Draw for Secret Santas

    So, maybe your teenagers don’t believe in Santa anymore, but no one ever really outgrows him–at least not the fun of presents. While people might tend to think of Secret Santas as an inner-office holiday tradition, family members can spread a little Christmas cheer (and magic) at home by secretly surprising one another with notes and low key treats and gifts in the days leading up to Christmas.

    The best part is that big kids are old enough to understand that the real fun of Santa is in the giving–not the getting. Consider challenging your kids (and yourself) and encourage their creativity by limiting Santa surprises to things they make themselves or that cost less than five dollars. 

    2. Bake together

    Cooking with big kids is actually way more fun than cooking with little ones. If your family doesn’t already have a favorite Christmas goodie recipe, make this the year you find one. If you do have one, consider upping your Christmas baking game. Invest in a nice set of cookie cutters or a beautiful pie dish, maybe even something that will become a cherished heirloom.

    Credit: Amazon

    Make time spent in the kitchen with your family during the holidays an event! Play Christmas music, wear cute aprons, drink cocoa (or wine), and try to create treats that are as lovely as they are delicious. With a few special touches, you can create a holiday tradition that will bring back some of that childhood magic–only in a more sophisticated, less messy way. 

    3. Make your own decorations

    Most moms have a box or two of cherished homemade ornaments and decorations made from salt dough, popsicle sticks, and adorable school photos. But why not keep the tradition of treasured ornaments going by creating new ones with your big kids? Again, what was fun with little ones can be fun with big kids too–as well as relaxing, easy, and elegant. 

    4. Listen to Christmas stories

    Personally, I don’t think anyone ever outgrows a good story. But even if you can’t get your kids to gather around the fire while you read Rudolph or the Polar Express, there are several short Christmas stories for more sophisticated readers that your family could enjoy listening to while baking or crafting. In A Christmas Day in the Morning by Pearl S. Buck, an old man recalls how, when he was 15, he realized for the first time that his father loved him and how he tried to return that love with a special Christmas gift for his dad.

    Truman Capote’s Christmas story is lovely to listen to or read.

    First published by Mademoiselle magazine, Truman Capote’s A Christmas Memory makes me laugh and cry every time I read it. And Angela and the Baby Jesus, read by Pulitzer Prize winning author, Frank McCourt is not only a tear-jerker but a sweet and funny story as well.

    5. Stay up really (I mean really) late on Christmas Eve

    Instead of waiting around on Christmas morning (or afternoon) for your big kids to finally get out of bed, consider just staying up most of the night on Christmas Eve. In some families, Christmas begins with a midnight church service, followed by a night of feasting, toasting, game playing, movie watching, and celebrating. Whether church is a part of your family’s tradition or not, staying up really late is a fun and festive way to ring in Christmas. 

    6. Go Carpool Karaoke Christmas Caroling

    If, like me, you have  fantasized about going old fashioned Christmas caroling with your family and delighting neighbors and friends with jolly renditions of classic holidays tunes, but you also know that will never ever ever happen, consider settling for carpool karaoke caroling. Actually, this version of caroling might be even more fun–although it could require a little deception.

    If your family is reluctant to pile in the car for a night of holiday singing, just pretend you’re going to dinner or to get ice-cream. Once everyone is in the car, just hand them one of these carpool Karaoke microphones that connects via bluetooth with a cell. Even the Scroogiest of teens won’t be able to resist.

    7. Buy them toys!

    Your kids might think they are too big for toys, but hand them a box of kinetic sand, and just see how long they play with it. Or try these fun magnetic blocks or this set specifically for stress relief. For outdoor fun surprise your big kids with this awesome sled. Or if there’s no snow where you live, light up the night with these fun bike lights or these basketball hoop lights.

    Or you could always do what my husband and I did a few years ago and arm all your big kids with Nerf Blasters and hundreds of darts. Full disclosure, years later, I still find Nerf darts in various random places throughout my house, and this particular gift did result in a trip to the ER and a few stitches. But it was totally worth it! 

    While it might not be possible to capture the same kind of magic that filled your home when your children were small, by adding a few new holiday traditions, you can add a fun and festive flair to your holidays–big kid style. 

    More Reading:

    Secret Santa Gifts: Dozens of Ideas Under $15

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    Laura Hanby Hudgens

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