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  • 25 Ways To Keep A Conversation Going With A Girl

    25 Ways To Keep A Conversation Going With A Girl

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    How to keep a conversation going with a girl isn’t really rocket science but it can really feel like it if you are the kind of person who overthinks every little thing and after hours of deliberation, you either come up with a plain old “hey” or “hello”. To get you out of your misery, we have come up with some clever ways you can tackle your difficulties.

    We have tricks and tips up our sleeves that make for great conversation starters, conversation topics, and light-hearted jokes that will help you avoid awkward silences. Hopefully, with the ideas listed out in this article for you, having a fun conversation with a girl won’t give you the jitters and might actually become a more enjoyable experience. We hope you find this article helpful.

    How You Can Keep A Conversation Going With A Girl 

    There are simple tricks to make a woman chase you that don’t require you to stress or become all anxious because we’ve all had that nervous conversation with a pretty girl we met on Instagram or Facebook, you know the one, in which you can’t help but think that she’s staring at that pimple that appeared out of nowhere last night.

    So then, how to keep the conversation going with a girl when you’re clearly too nervous about what she is going to think of you? The answer is simple. The next time you meet a girl you really like and don’t want to fumble or make things awkward, you just have to keep things light and funny. You don’t have to talk about the universe or tell her how the human body works. Just a few questions like: 

    • What did you do today?
    • How was work?
    • Do you read?
    • What’s your favorite movie?
    • Who is your favorite Kar-Jenner sister? (Or basically any pop culture question that’s trending at the moment. Trust me, this is works like a charm)

    Chatting with girls is a whole different ball game. How to start a conversation with them might have you stressed out, but it doesn’t have to be as nerve-racking as people make it out to be. To make sure your next conversation is a more engaging one, take a look at the following 10 ways to keep a conversation going with a girl:

    1. Don’t hey and pray — think of things to talk about with a girl

    Meaning, don’t just send a boring “hey!” Whatsapp messages to every woman you meet on Facebook and Instagram. Saying an astonishingly boring “hi” is going to fuel awkward silences and your bad day won’t get any worse than that. Instead, while looking to maintain a conversation with a girl and trying to find interesting ways to chat, start out by asking her about something she mentioned in the bio of the dating app or her Instagram profile. If there’s a common interest, start with that. 

    Related Reading: How To Talk To Women And Impress Them Instantly

    2. Don’t be too eager to impress

    How to make small talk with a girl is not about letting words roll off your tongue non-stop. It’s not about showing off how wealthy you are and how many cars you own. Here’s what you can do instead. Once you’ve sent your opener that’s not just a boring “hey”, it’s now time to level up your game where you don’t brag about yourself.

    Right now your aim is to take a deep breath and:

    • Try to get her full attention 
    • Fill in the silent moments with talks about mutual interests, friends, work life, pets, and ambitions 
    • Mention topics that she likes to make her stay interested in the conversation 

    In your quest to impress this girl, you might just come off a tad bit creepy sometimes. We’d recommend not overdoing it with the puns about her name or better yet, avoid it altogether. Puns can very quickly go from receiving an “aww!” to an “okay, stop”. Knowing how to make a girl laugh will help, but don’t worry too much about it. Consider not double texting if you don’t receive a reply, especially if you two have just started talking. When you’re not too worried about impressing this girl, the performance anxiety will subside. 

    For more expert-backed insights, please subscribe to our Youtube Channel. Click here.

    3. How to chat with a girl without being boring? Ask her about herself 

    To make the conversation flow in person and if you are texting her on Whatsapp, consider asking her interesting questions about herself that she can’t reply to with a simple yes or no. Instead of asking boring questions, ask open-ended questions like:

    • Are you a beer person or a teetotaller? 
    • Do you enjoy camping or prefer visiting museums?
    • Tell me your pet peeves.

    When you appear genuinely interested, she will enjoy talking about herself with you. It should also show you that she likes you enough to tell you about herself. That should get the ball rolling!   

    4. Be yourself, devoid of any pressure

    How to keep a conversation going with a girl is not about faking it. It is about being able to reveal the best possible side of yourself to her. So when you’re wondering about ways to keep a conversation going with a girl, the answer is the same way you keep a conversation going with anyone else. Here are some things you can try to be yourself:

    • Try not to be anxious or stressed when approaching her
    • Consider her as just another person you happened to meet in your life
    • Try not to let your anxiety ruin your coffee date

    When you’re not worried about trying to impress or not feeling the pressure to perform, you won’t try to make your conversation a theatrical performance. You’ll be more at ease, hence come off as inviting and confident, and be able to reveal the person you truly are. You should give some thought to how to fix any social anxiety you may have. If there’s one thing we’ve been told since the Stone Age, it’s that straight girls like a guy who’s confident. Now you know what to do! 

    5. How to hold a conversation with a girl? Be courteous 

    Every time anyone describes someone, chances are they’ll start with “s/he’s nice!”. Since this is the first thing people notice about you and the first trait people talk about to a third party, make sure you don’t come off as patronizing. You want her to think you are “nice” at the very least.

    Wondering how to keep a conversation going with a girl? There won’t be one if you’re busy mansplaining or come off as a snob. Stray far away from any condescending tones or remarks. Being “nice” is pretty much a prerequisite if you want to maintain a conversation with anyone really, be it a love interest or the bartender who just won’t look your way. 

    Related Reading: How To Date A Girl Out Of Your League

    6. Match her energy

    How to chat with a girl without being boring? Try to match her energy and she will instantly gravitate toward you. Your body language must exude that you are interested in her. Mirror her body language. If she’s excited about something, show her you’re excited for her. When she is being empathetic, match her emotions, and your conversations will become that much more engaging. 

    7. Tell her about yourself (if she asks)

    Once you are done asking cute questions to your crush, see if she is interested in getting to know you as well. If she’s genuinely interested in you, give information about yourself that will help her get to know you. Do make sure you tell her interesting things about yourself and the experiences you’ve had. Try to bring up fun and engaging stories to make her laugh or gasp. That’s our tip on how to keep a conversation going with a girl. 

    8. Have a random conversation with no ulterior motive

    It doesn’t take a dating coach to tell you that it’s better to not stress too much about how to keep a convo going with a girl. Just talk about random things that come up instead. These random conversation topics can indeed be super fun. And they can lead to inside jokes as well. Furthermore, if the regular conversation topics aren’t enough to keep the girl talking, ask her something totally silly and make her feel like she can laugh her heart out when she is with you. 

    9. Bring up things she might want to talk about 

    Don’t form your own perspective and think that she’ll be interested in everything that you have to say. Don’t start off on a rant about your favorite sports team ruining your weekend by losing the match. That might not work unless she’s into that of course. Talk about the things she likes. Some other things to talk about with your crush include:

    • If she loves watching movies, ask her what’s her favorite film and why it resonates with her so much (Subtly throw in the new movie that’s releasing next week and let her know you are more than welcome to take her) 
    • Ask her about her childhood or any favorite memory from her childhood days
    • If she says she loves traveling, ask her which country is next on her bucket list 

    Related Reading: 5 Tips To Talk To An Attractive Girl

    10. Make vague plans 

    How to keep a convo going with a girl? Well, this one should do the trick. Making vague plans is saying something along the lines of “Yeah there’s this great coffee place I found, we should go there sometime!” when she mentions she likes coffee. It goes without saying that vague plans should be made once you have a decent enough connection with her. If she loves to talk to you, then she’ll say yes to that coffee date. 

    The benefit of this includes establishing that you’re interested in going out with her and seeing how she responds to it. You’ll get to know if she actually wants to follow up with those plans without you having to actually ask her out completely. It could eventually even lead to a fun conversation about what you two might do when you go there.

    11. Don’t force the conversation 

    It takes time to build a connection with someone. That’s why when her body language begins to portray that she is uncomfortable, walk away instead of forcing a conversation to take place. It’s your biggest hint that she isn’t interested. No amount of interesting conversation starters on her favorite topics, compliments on what she’s wearing, and icebreakers are going to make your case.

    12. Avoid asking personal questions 

    It doesn’t take a dating coach to tell you this but if you want to keep things light and interesting, then avoid asking personal questions. She’ll feel like she is being interrogated if you keep asking about her past relationships and things she is not comfortable sharing with anyone let alone a guy she met on Facebook with. Steer clear from such questions and stick to pop culture questions and getting to know her for now. 

    13. How to keep the conversation going with a girl? Let your eyes do some talking

    Learn how to flirt with your eyes. The eye contact game is essential to make her feel like you have eyes only for her. Some playful teasing with your eyes would do the trick more than words. You just have to know when to look at her and when to stop. If you can maintain eye contact for more than 3 seconds, then she is interested in having a conversation with you as well. 

    14. Try to compliment her 

    Whether you are having text conversations or talking to her in person, try to break the ice by complimenting her. Tell her the dress she’s wearing is nice or you can try other compliments like:

    • I like the way you’ve done your hair
    • Red really suits you 
    • The heels really match your outfit 
    • You have a good dressing sense

    Related Reading: 35 Best Conversation Topics If You Are In A Long-Distance Relationship

    15. Flirt naturally 

    You’re with this amazing girl at a coffee shop and you’re gonna miss this opportunity to flirt with her? Absolutely not. Flirting should be natural here. Don’t try to force it. Here are some things you can do to make it look organic:

    • Keep smiling (not in a creepy way though)
    • Know when to touch her and when to keep your hands to yourself 
    • Try to slightly touch her arm 
    • Use some funny yet flirty conversation starters like “I suck at conversation starters. Do you want to try?”
    • Mirror her body language 
    • Laugh if she is saying something funny 

    16. Don’t interrupt her when she’s speaking 

    Whether or not it makes sense, don’t interrupt a girl who loves to talk. Regardless of whether or not it aligns with your opinions and judgment, don’t get into a low-key debate with her. Meet her in the middle ground and try to agree to disagree to keep the conversation interesting. Give her your full attention, maintain eye contact, and smile. This is how to keep the conversation going with a girl who you wouldn’t want to miss out on. 

    17. Smoothly transition to a different topic if she is losing interest 

    If you think she is getting bored with your high school stories, be smart to catch it. Don’t keep talking about one thing for a longer time period because there are chances of her losing interest in your silly stories. Once you see signs she has lost interest, don’t act embarrassed or drag it till you’ve finished your story. Swiftly transition to another topic or regain momentum by changing the topic to something she is interested in.

    18. You can also gossip a little with her 

    This is one of the easy ways to keep a girl interested. If you belong to the same friend circle or have mutual friends, then the two of you can gossip a little. Keep it non-toxic though. The reason why we say that you can gossip is that when you are gossiping with someone, you foster a certain amount of trust between each other. It’s a great way to strengthen the bond.

    Relaed Reading: 65 Funny Texts To Get Her Attention And Make Her Text You

    19. Don’t make the conversation all about you 

    There is nothing more frustrating than listening to someone go on and on about their life. A conversation involves two people. If you keep talking about your friends and your work life, she is not wrong to get bored and lose interest. Keep it interesting by flowing the discussion both ways. 

    20. Offer to buy her a drink or dinner 

    If you are at a coffee shop, restaurant, or at a bar, offer her to buy something. Spending a few dollars on a girl you are interested in shows that you have the qualities of a good man. She would love to have a conversation with a guy like that. Take this as an opportunity to learn more about her and use it to your advantage. For example:

    • She likes black coffee? So do you. Tell how you can’t do life without coffee and bond over the fact that you’re both coffee people
    • She likes gin and tonic? Share an interesting story where you had the most expensive gin and tonic and build the conversation from there on
    • Is she vegan? Tell her how much you appreciate the whole vegan lifestyle 

    21. Notice more than just her appearance 

    Yes, she is beautiful. A hundred people must have told her that by now. But what will make a girl think about you? When you notice beyond her physical appearance. Listed below are some compliments that aren’t about her looks:

    • I really like the way you think 
    • You’re very smart. I would like to pick your brain more on that AI thing 
    • You speak so well 
    • You really are an incredible painter 

    22. Send her a meme 

    How to keep the conversation going with a girl over text? Send her memes. Memes are the biggest thing on the internet at the moment. Not only do they make you laugh but they have become one of the love languages. When you see a meme that reminds you of her, send it to her along with the text, “This reminded me of you.” This will let her know that you think about her when she isn’t around. 

    23. Keep your phone away 

    There is nothing more annoying than talking to someone who is constantly checking their phone. It’s one of the biggest turn-offs ever. It doesn’t matter if the conversation isn’t on your favorite topic. You have to at least pretend you are listening instead of using the phone. Put your phone on silent and spend the evening getting to know each other.

    Related Reading: 150 Truth Or Drink Questions: Swirl Some Fun, Sizzle, Kinks, And Romance

    24. Don’t reveal if you stalked them online 

    This is nothing to be ashamed of. We all do this before meeting someone for the first time. Just don’t over share and confess that you stalked them online. Telling them that you know what dress they wore to their best friend’s wedding that happened in Hawaii is only going to make her feel uncomfortable. Just hold off on mentioning your cyberstalking skills for now.

    25. Send her random text messages 

    How to keep the conversation going with a girl? Random good morning text messages will brighten her day. It will definitely put a smile on her face just as much as a good night text does. If you had a long conversation with her one day, then make sure you send a text 24 hours later. It could be anything random like:

    • Hey. Hope you are having a good day
    • I just happened to pass by the restaurant we were talking about the other day and I tried their crab. It’s exactly as delicious as you said it is 
    • I am free this weekend. Want to catch up or something?

    FAQs

    1. What are the topics to talk about with a girl?

    Things to ask her to keep the conversation going can be questions about herself, or her interests and opinions. What matters most is that you ask open-ended questions that will initiate a conversation and not just yes or no replies. You could talk about her experiences, her goals, what she likes to do, and what she thinks about certain things. If she asks about you, talk about some nice experiences you’ve had in your life.

    2. How can I impress a girl by chatting?

    Being witty will help your cause, but don’t let the pressure of being witty keep you racking your brain for hours on end. Just be yourself and text her and forget all that pressure to be funny. Be courteous, but not too eager to impress. By being a good listener and being a little witty, you will be doing more than enough to keep the conversation going.

    3. What should I text a girl?

    If it’s your first time texting her, texting anything instead of “hey” or “what’s up” will get the conversation flowing. Try to pick something up from her bio that you can comment on to get things started. While chatting with a girl, you can text her compliments (but don’t go overboard) or throw in open-ended questions you know she’ll like answering.

    4. What to talk about with a girl you just met?

    Perhaps start off with the basic questions. Ask her where she works, where she is from, and what she does for fun. Then maybe you can dive into more fun questions like whether she likes roller-skating or how she drinks her coffee. Reading the room is incredibly important so you don’t seem weird. Don’t start a conversation with “Do you like the beach?”

    20 Things To Talk About With Your Crush

    How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date – 18 Tips To Make Her Say Yes

    Addictive Flirty Texting: 25 Texts That Will Make Him Want You More

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  • 6 Cheaters Tell Us How They Feel About Themselves

    6 Cheaters Tell Us How They Feel About Themselves

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    Among the many turmoils a relationship goes through, cheating is considered the most devastating. And rightly so. The breach of trust, the disrespect that it embodies is nothing short of a cardinal sin. This understanding largely is molded by looking at infidelity from the perspective of the one who’s been cheated on. In the process, we often fail to see how do cheaters feel about themselves. But one thing is for sure. People who cheat do it for their selfish reasons.

    In fact, it won’t be a stretch to say that the state of mind of a cheater has been incorrectly stereotyped. They’re often touted to be insensitive, unfeeling, and callous people who don’t flinch before exposing their relationships to the risk of destruction and their partners to a lifetime of emotional trauma. While no amount of rationalization can justify the breach of trust that manifests in the wake of infidelity, complex emotional situations such as these are hardly as black and white as they’re made out to be.

    A cheater’s mind is fraught with feelings of guilt, fear of getting caught, the uncertainty of the future of both relationships, a sense of being torn between their primary and affair partners. They love the initial thrill of an affair but they do get their karma down the lane. But do cheaters realize what they lost? Do cheaters miss their ex? If such questions have been on your mind because your partner has breached the line of faithfulness or even out of sheer curiosity, we’re here to help you understand how can cheating affect the cheater. Let’s hear it straight from the horse’s mouth with confessions of people who have cheated on their partners.

    What Is Cheating?

    Before we get to decoding how does cheating affect the cheater and how does it feel to cheat on someone you love, it’s vital to define what counts as cheating in a relationship. Broadly, cheating can be defined as a monogamist or mono-amorous person in a committed relationship forming a romantic connection with someone other than their partner.

    However, as we said before, when it comes to complex emotional matters, things are hardly black and white. There is often a lot of grey area to navigate. For instance, for some people, even looking at another person as an object of desire is cheating. They may believe that there is nothing called harmless flirting when you’re already in a committed relationship.

    Likewise, looking through your old flame’s photographs on social media can be considered cheating on your partner. Cheating can be very subjective and how a person defines cheating is entirely up to their perspective on cheating. People could be micro-cheating and treating it as a bit of harmless fun or they could be involved in an emotional affair without even realizing that they are being unfaithful to their partner.

    Cheating has taken different forms in the modern age but how do cheaters feel about themselves? This is a very important aspect that determines how cheating will affect a relationship. Unless a person is a seasoned serial cheater, betraying their partner’s trust takes a huge toll on their peace of mind and emotional health long before their transgression comes to light and even if it doesn’t get exposed at all.

    Related Reading: Confession Story: Emotional Cheating Vs Friendship – The Blurry Line

    How Do Cheaters Feel About Themselves?

    • How does a cheater feel after being caught?
    • Do cheaters get their karma? Do cheaters suffer?
    • Do cheaters realize what they lost?
    • Do cheaters miss their ex?
    • Do they feel shame?

    Questions like these begin swirling around in our minds when we are cheated on but we don’t realize that there are deadly lies cheaters tell themselves and their partners to get rid of their guilt and wrongdoings.

    We still hope that by asking the right questions to an unfaithful spouse or partner, we can lessen our pain. When that doesn’t work out, we want our partner to feel the pain that we are going through. In most cases, cheaters do feel remorse for their actions long before they are caught.

    Yet, people cheat and continue going down the path of self-sabotaging their relationships, knowing full well the consequences of their actions. Though cheating is a weakness, it makes people feel powerful and in control of their stories albeit momentarily. Perhaps, it gives them a sense of fulfillment in the moment or infuses a rush of thrill, excitement and desire in their lives.

    Whatever be the reason behind this tendency to play with fire that has the potential of engulfing their entire lives and reducing it to ashes, cheaters do suffer emotionally at every step of the way. Infidelity can be a lonely experience, which can turn into a tormenting mix of guilt, shame, fear.

    For more expert-backed insights, subscribe to our YouTube channel. Click here

    How Do Cheaters Feel When They Get Caught?

    One thing all cheaters have in common is that when they get caught and their secret affair gets discovered, most of the time, it is liberating. For all the shame, pain, hurt, accusations, an affair coming to light also brings with it an end to the secrecy, hiding, carefully constructed web of lies to keep one’s partner in the dark. That can be a welcome relief for a cheating partner because most people are aware, at the back of their minds, that lifelong affairs are a rarity and an illicit romantic connection comes with a limited shelf life.

    Once the affair is exposed, the cheater feels like they are compelled to stop running away from making a choice between their partner and paramour. There is no longer a need to continue staying in a relationship that suffocates you but you can’t get out of owing to a latent sense of duty. There is also no need to continue deceiving the partner and betraying their trust at every step of the way.

    Getting caught brings a cheater face-to-face with clear choices ahead of them: surviving the affair and rebuilding the relationship (provided their partner is willing to give them another chance), starting a new life with their affair partner, or leaving behind both relationships and turning over a new leaf in their life.

    How do cheaters feel about themselves upon getting caught? No matter how constricted a person feels when cheating on their partner, the discovery of their transgression is never easy to come to terms with. Cheaters suffer consequences and every cheater goes through different stages of guilt during this time, ranging from shifting the blame to their partner to trying to salvage the relationship, slipping into depression over what they’ve lost, and finally, coming to terms with the consequences of their actions.

    So, if you’ve wondered do cheaters realize what they lost, they most definitely do. However, by then, a lot of damage has already been caused to all parties involved.

    Related Reading: Everything You Need To Know About The 7 Types Of Affairs That Exist

    What Is Cheaters’ Psychology?

    Basically, two types of mentality lead to cheating:

    • First, when you are too cowardly to make a clean break off your current relationship but need a way out
    • Secondly, when you feel entitled to be loved by more than one partner irrespective of how your partner feels about it. You want a new girlfriend/boyfriend, You want a new romance because you feel like you are entitled to it.

    The first one may be a result of deep-rooted insecurities or poor attachment styles that make you want to seek an easy way out of a sense of unfulfillment in your primary relationship than address it head-on. These kinds of cheaters suffer, feel shame, and they feel guilty for acting out of their own insecurities. The second has all the telling markings of serial cheaters perspectives.

    Cheaters from the second category never change. Even those who turn to cheating as an escape mechanism may find it hard to break the pattern without the will to work on rewiring their basic perceptions of love, relationships and conflicts with the help of an expert counselor or therapist. Most cheaters justify everything other than actual intercourse as casual or harmless. Cheaters have all kinds of things to say about what they feel about cheating and some don’t feel guilty at all. Strangely sometimes wives feel guilty when their husbands cheat. 

    6 Cheaters Tell Us How They Feel About Themselves After Cheating

    Do cheaters get their karma? If so, what are the karmic consequences of cheating? Do they feel horrible about themselves for cheating on their partners? How do they go to sleep at night and look at themselves in the mirror? How do cheaters feel about themselves? The mind can truly boggle by a barrage of questions that infidelity can rake up. We’re here to help answer at least a few of those through these insights on how cheating affects the cheater from people who’ve lived these experiences first-hand. These are true stories and therefore the names have been altered.

    1. “I cheated before my marriage” – Rohit 

    “Bandana and I have been married for 6 years. I was caught cheating. I cheated on her with God knows how many people. But that was before we were married. I immediately uninstalled all the dating sites after I got married. I didn’t tell her before we were married because I thought that it didn’t matter. I tried to tell her that but she would not listen. Then she asked me something that made me realize where I went wrong.

    “She asked me, why did I hide it in the first place for so many years if it didn’t matter. For the first time, I started feeling bogged down by cheating guilt and realized why I hid it from her for so long. I was wrong then and I’m wrong now. I have felt the karmic consequences of cheating long after my transgression. What I feel for her is true love and now she is heartbroken. She gave me another chance and we decided to stay together. I can only hope she will find it in her heart to forgive me. I realized that cheaters suffer equally as the ones who got cheated on.”

    2. “I feel horrible about her questioning eyes” – Kashyap

    “Piu is the love of my life, she’s my home. But for years I cheated on her as I felt suffocated by commitment because of my low self-esteem. But then, these affairs started feeling like a burden and I wanted to be released from them. I started having cheaters regret. I knew I made a mistake by cheating on someone I truly love. So, I confessed everything to Piu and she forgave me. Yes, I have been an unfaithful partner but she forgave me. However, I couldn’t forgive myself. I cheated on her because of my own insecurities.

    “My commitment issues got the better of me and it was the biggest mistake of my life. I am trying my best to fix things. If you ask me how do cheaters feel about themselves, I would just say one word, horrible. I have erased her smile. Every time my phone rings or I get a text, she looks at me with a question in her eyes but she doesn’t say anything. I feel like I’m in the prison of my own guilt. I feel so much remorse. I just ruined our relationship.”

    Related Reading: The Affair Aftermath – 6 Ways To Get Over Cheating Guilt

    3. “Karma got back to me” – Bihu

    “When I was dating Samar, I cheated on him with Debu. It went on for a while until I finally broke up with Samar and started dating Debu. Samar was devastated but I didn’t care. It all affected me only when I found out that Debu was cheating on me. It is only then I started to understand how Samar must have felt. When you cheat on someone, someone else will cheat on you in the future. I felt the same pain that I gave someone. That’s cheaters karma.

    “I called Samar to apologize but it was too late. Samar was already in a happy relationship. My pain of being cheated on by Debu was only challenged by my guilt of cheating on Samar. Do cheaters get their karma? If you ask me, I’d say there’s no escaping it. Karma got back to me. The situation was truly sad and taught me a terrible lesson. This is one of the main reasons why I tell my friends to never cheat on someone they love because people who cheat are never the same again. The guilt of what they did haunts them forever.”

    4. “I feel guilty when he shows love” – Nilima

    “When Pritam went to work abroad I felt very lonely. Rohit and I got intimate a few times but we both knew that it was nothing serious. It has been a long time, but now Pritam has come back to India and wants to marry me. I feel guilty but I don’t know if I should tell him the whole thing but I can’t say yes to the marriage without telling him anything.

    “I feel like I have betrayed his trust and can never have a normal life with him anymore. Every gesture of love he shows me makes me feel more and more guilty every day. I want us to stay together but I don’t know how to deal with my guilt, which leaves me stifled every moment. That’s precisely how cheating affects the cheater.”

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    5. “My hasty decision ruined everything” – Shilpi

    “My boyfriend, Swarna, was in a relationship with three other girls from my class or so I was convinced by one of my friends. I felt insulted and cheated. To get back at him, I went ahead and had a one-night stand. I made one of the classic mistakes in a long-distance relationship of letting distance erode the trust. Later, I found out that my friends were helping Swarna plan a surprise visit to see me.

    “It was surprising for me but a shock for Swarna, who walked in on me in bed with another person. How could I ever hurt such a person? Maybe I have ruined my relationship with my hasty vengeance. I begged and wanted us to stay together but that was out of the question. I’ll never get over the guilt of what I did to Swarna. I cannot even begin to tell how I feel about myself after cheating. Do cheaters realize what they lost, you ask? Every single moment. Cheaters suffer a lot, I’d say.”

    6. “My wife supported me when my secretary started blackmailing” – Riju

    “My wife felt neglected while I had an affair with my secretary. My wife, mother of my two children: she sacrificed her career to take care of me, my children and my family and I rewarded her by cheating on her. I ignored her and spent all my time with my secretary.

    “I had to tell my wife about the affair when my secretary started to blackmail me. My wife supported me and helped me to deal with the situation. But I lost her trust. I’m doing what I can to reinstate love and trust in my marriage but I don’t know if it would ever be enough for her to recover from her heartbreak. I only feel remorse now and nothing else.”

    Do serial cheaters feel remorse?

    Serial cheaters are different from one-time cheaters because cheating comes to them pathologically and it is a part of their system. Serial cheaters can keep cheating with a straight face and keep convincing their partners every time that everything is hunky-dory. Serial cheaters are typically narcissists who look at every person as a possible conquest, they are very charming and feel no remorse about cheating. Sometimes on rare occasions, if they feel guilty about cheating they quickly brush that aside and get back to their ways. So if you ask serial cheaters how they feel about themselves chances are they would say they feel great.

    If someone cheated on you and you decide to cheat on them with someone else, then trust me, you are not going to heal this way. Cheating is a menace that destroys lives and families. Most of all it destroys trust in a relationship: that is truly a regrettable loss. It takes a toll on everyone involved, including the cheater. If you have been cheating on your partner and don’t know how to put an end to the affair before it’s too late, know that you’re not alone.

    Scores of people battle similar dilemmas and benefit from seeking counseling to understand how to break problematic attachment patterns. The fact that you want to make amends is a step in the right direction. You can go through this journey with the guidance of a skilled therapist. With licensed and experienced therapists on Bonobology’s panel, the right help is only a click away.

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  • A Comprehensive Guide to Zero-Spread Trading Accounts – Morning Lazziness

    A Comprehensive Guide to Zero-Spread Trading Accounts – Morning Lazziness

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    When it comes to trading in the financial markets, the spread is a crucial factor to consider. The spread is the difference between the bid and ask prices of a particular financial instrument. In traditional trading accounts, the spread can be quite wide, which can eat into a trader’s profits.

    However, with the advent of zero-spread trade accounts, traders now have the opportunity to trade with minimal or no spread at all. 

    A zero gap or pip is a type of trading account that allows traders to trade with minimal or no spread. In other words, the bid and ask prices of a financial instrument on brokers with zero spread are the same or very close to each other. This means that traders can enter and exit trades at the same price, which can greatly reduce the cost of trading. 

    In this article, we will take a closer look at zero-spread accounts, the way they work, and the advantages and disadvantages of using them.

    Understanding the Mechanics: How Zero-Spread Accounts Work

    In a traditional trading account, the gap is determined by the market maker or broker. The market maker or broker takes into account various factors, such as liquidity and volatility, to set the spread.

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    However, in a zero-gap account, the spread is removed or significantly reduced. This is achieved by the broker or market maker using a different pricing model, such as an ECN (Electronic Communication Network) or STP (Straight Through Processing) model.

    What Is the Difference Between a Raw-Spread and Zero-Spread Account?

    A raw-spread account is a type of trading account where the gap or price difference is determined by the market maker or broker. The gap or price difference can be quite wide and may vary depending on the financial instrument being traded and the market conditions. On the other hand, a zero-gap account is a type of trading account where the spread is removed or significantly reduced.

    Pros and Cons of Zero-Spread Accounts

    Here is a quick comparison of the pros and cons of zero-gap accounts:

    Advantages of Zero-Spread Accounts

    stocks

    Zero gap accounts have several advantages, including:

    • Lower Trading Costs: As the gap is removed or significantly reduced, the cost of trading becomes lower, too.
    • Faster Execution: With minimal or no gap or pip, traders can enter and exit trades faster, which can lead to better trading opportunities.
    • Increased Transparency: Such trades use different pricing models such as ECN or STP, which can increase transparency in the trading process.
    • Reduced Impact of Slippage: Slippage occurs when the trader’s order is executed at a different price than the one requested. It can happen due to market volatility, lack of liquidity and other factors. In a minimal-pip account, since the gap is minimal or nonexistent, the chances of slippage are greatly reduced.
    • Increased Efficiency in Scalping Strategies: Scalping is a trading strategy that involves taking advantage of small price movements by executing many trades in a short period of time. In a no-gap account, the cost of each trade is greatly reduced, making it more efficient for scalping strategies.

    Disadvantages of Zero-Spread Accounts

    However, zero-gap accounts also have the following disadvantages:

    • Limited Instrument Availability: Not all financial instruments may be available for trading with a no-gap trade.
    • Less Control over the Spread: Traders have less control over the spread in a no-gap account as the spread is removed or significantly reduced.
    • Dependence on the Quality of the Chosen Broker’s Execution: STP trades rely on the execution quality of the chosen broker. If the broker has poor execution speed or reliability, it can have a negative impact on the trader’s performance.
    • Dependence on the Market Conditions and Liquidity: Such trades may be affected by the market conditions. If there is low liquidity or high volatility, it can cause problems in the execution of trades. A lack of liquidity can cause slippage, and high volatility can cause the bid-ask prices to be far apart, making it difficult to execute trades at the desired price.

    Conclusion

    In a nutshell, a zero-spread trading account is a type of account that allows traders to trade with minimal or no gap. This type of account is achieved by the broker or market maker using a different pricing model, such as an ECN or STP model. 

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    Zero-gap accounts have several advantages such as lower trading costs, faster execution, and increased transparency, but they also feature higher trading costs, limited instrument availability, and less control over the gap. Traders should weigh the pros and cons before deciding to open a zero-spread account.

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    Shruti Sood

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  • 10 Unspoken Boundaries For Being Friends With An Ex

    10 Unspoken Boundaries For Being Friends With An Ex

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    Breakups are painful. There are lots of unresolved issues and there are chances of either or both the partners still being in love with each other. That’s why it’s essential to address the unspoken boundaries for being friends with an ex. You don’t want to reignite your feelings toward your former partner nor do you want to bicker and start hating them.

    If you and your former partner are on the sample page about having a platonic relationship after the breakup, then you can establish ground rules together. If they are hesitant and being friends with you is an excuse to get close to you and get intimate details about your life, then you may want to keep these rules to yourself and make sure they don’t cross your boundaries.

    How Do You Set Friendship Boundaries With An Ex?

    A breakup, especially after a long-term relationship, can leave a person struggling with many unresolved issues and there’s always the ever-elusive closure if things ended abruptly. That’s why people are always saying that spending time with your ex isn’t a good idea because it can conjure up memories and feelings that won’t end well for you. They’re right to be concerned because breakups are tough.

    When asked on Reddit how exes can be friends, a user replied, “It is definitely possible but the success varies greatly on the nature of the breakup, the maturity of the two people involved, the boundaries set and kept to by each individual, and the expectations of the friendship as a whole.”

    Did your ex ruin a relationship where you poured all your heart? Or did you do something to hurt them that caused the breakup? Whatever the reason is, you need to know that setting boundaries for being friends with an ex will save you a great deal of pain. Now, if you are wondering about the rules for being friends with an ex, then the first thing you need to do is think long and hard about the following:

    1. Residual feelings

    Going through a breakup is like tasting rotten food, whereas life post-breakup feels tasteless. The experience is horrible and, in the end, you’re still left with a bad taste in your mouth. This bad taste in the case of your breakup is the feeling that it leaves behind. Based on the theory of stages of grief, you’re bound to go through the stages of grief which include:

    • Denial
    • Anger
    • Depression
    • Bargaining
    • Acceptance 

    Likewise, when recovering from a breakup, people tend to get stuck in any one of these stages, especially anger. So, before being friends with an ex who hurt you, you need to be careful that you have gotten through the feelings of angst and pain. Be sure that you have no anger or hurt left to dish out otherwise the next time you meet them, it will be a disaster. 

    Just seeing your ex will trigger all those annoying feelings that you had for them.

    2. Self-perception

    The hardest part about a breakup is the hit that your confidence takes. When someone breaks up with you start to question everything about yourself. You feel uncomfortable in your own skin and you aren’t able to fathom how one person’s absence can create such intense emotional turmoil inside you. 

    If you were the one who broke things off, then too you’ll go through something similar but your questions will be more like ‘What is wrong with me?’ ‘Did I just throw away the best thing that’s ever happened to me?’ ‘Why do I have such severe trust issues?’ In this case, too your self-confidence will take a hit. That’s why you must go through a self-love period and rebuild your self-esteem before you even begin to contemplate the boundaries for being friends with an ex.

    Related Reading: 11 Tips To Deal With Loneliness After Breakup And Find Support

    3. Closure

    A key part of moving on from a relationship is closure. So, if you’ve been through a breakup and are thinking about being friends with an ex who hurt you, then you need to ask yourself this question: Have I had closure? Honestly, closure can come in many ways.

    Honestly, closure can come in many ways and it could look anything like these:

    • Having an effective conversation where you sort out your unresolved issues and old feelings of negativity 
    • Setting healthy boundaries and coming to an agreement that neither will cross their limits
    • Accepting that this relationship has reached its end 

    What Are The Boundaries For Being Friends With An Ex?

    Friendship with your ex sounds daunting, especially with all the hurt feelings that they gave you but you need to find out how to set boundaries for being friends with an ex because sometimes you just can’t avoid them. Like maybe they’re your coworker, maybe they’re your best friend, or maybe you live in the same building. In all of these cases, meeting your ex is inevitable, and quite literally, unavoidable.

    At the same time, understanding why ex wants to be friends is just as important as being clear about your reasons to maintain a platonic connection with them. It could be something as harmless as them not wanting to split your group of friends down the middle or as twisted as using friendship to keep alive the possibility of getting back together. You need to be prepared for any possibility and the best way to do that is by setting a few rules for being friends with an ex, like these:

    1. No flirting

    This is the most important thing to consider when setting boundaries with an ex when in a new relationship or when you are single and still healing from the breakup. Being around each other may make you unconsciously touch their arm or say flirty things to each other. 

    Here are some body language flirting you need to be mindful of when you are communicating with your former partner:

    • Avoid texting them at odd hours
    • Don’t react to their flirtation
    • Don’t send them heart emojis 
    • Don’t ask questions about their sex life 
    • Avoid leading them on by trying to seduce them 

    Once you’ve found a way to be comfortable around each other, a little flirting here and there might work. Like in the case of Robin and Ted from How I Met Your Mother. But this is one of the non-negotiable boundaries for being friends with an ex. You can’t flirt in the beginning, it will just complicate things.

    For more expert-backed insights, please subscribe to our Youtube Channel. Click here.

    2. Wait until you’ve gotten over the breakup

    If your ex wants to have a platonic relationship, then let them know that you need some time to adjust to life post-breakup. Let them know that your past relationship is still looming over you and you aren’t able to get over it. Even if you’ve ended the relationship on good terms, you still need time to go through the mourning period. Recover from the hit that you’ve just taken.

    If you don’t take that time, then you’ll never properly recover. You’ll be around the biggest reminder of your failed relationship. And even if you didn’t want it, your self-esteem will take a hit every time you see them making progress in their love life. So, always wait till you’ve gotten over your relationship significantly before you start spending time with your ex. 

    When asked on Redddit if it’s a good idea to be friends with an ex, a user replied, “I think it takes a lot longer than 6 months to really be friends with a very significant ex, but yes, if you’re, say, two years past the breakup, then absolutely it’s possible to be good friends. At the very least give yourself and him time to date a couple of other significant people before you start a close relationship again.”

    3. Keep it casual

    Being friends with an ex means starting completely fresh and building a new connection with them from the ground up. You need to draw boundaries and not let old habits and feelings reignite love. If you’re wondering about boundaries for being friends with an ex-wife or an ex-husband, then the most important one is to stay platonic. Whenever you’re together, you need to keep things casual. Some of the examples of boundaries with an ex include:

    • No talking about your past relationships
    • No discussing relationship goals
    • Avoid indulging in sharing excessive details about someone new you are dating 
    • Don’t ask intimate details about their current partner 
    • Don’t force this friendship to work. Let it flow naturally and have a good time getting to know each other as friends 

    Related Reading: The 12 Mantras Of Being Happily Single While You Are Single

    4. Respect each other’s personal space

    The biggest problem that people face when they’re trying to be friends with an ex is that as soon as they get over the initial awkwardness, they tend to forget about the breakup. They return to the level of comfort that they shared in their relationship. This is the moment when you need to have a serious talk about setting boundaries for being friends with an ex. 

    If you’ve gotten comfortable around each other, then you need to establish the parameters of personal space in your new relationship. For example, while in a relationship you were both entitled to know everything about each other’s day, but now as friends, you’re allowed to keep some personal details to yourself. Preserving your personal space is one of the most important boundaries for being friends with an ex. It is the only thing that will help you start fresh with them.

    Related Reading: 9 Expert Tips To Cope With Depression After Breakup

    5. Let go of all the bad blood

    Every relationship has its ups and downs. The memories of these are riddled with all the feelings that have accompanied them. That’s why when you’re considering the boundaries for being friends with an ex, letting go of the past and starting fresh becomes an important one because you can’t be your ex’s new friend if there is still bad blood between the two of you. Here are some ground rules you need to establish when you are drawing boundaries for being friends with an ex while in a relationship or while still being single:

    • Don’t reminisce the fond memories
    • Don’t play the blame game and revisit the causes of the breakup 
    • Avoid meeting at places where you shared happy memories together 
    • Don’t involve your friends in this by trash-talking about each other 
    Unspoken Boundaries For Being Friends With An Ex (infographic)

    6. Be on the lookout for feelings

    Given your history with your ex, there is always the chance of catching feelings… again. When you start having a good time with them, the past will get triggered, which can lead to old emotions coming back to life. Their old habits may make you fall for them again. This is the reason why breakup sex exists. Exes that spend time together alone after the breakup end up relapsing and having sex but this usually leads to the closure that they need to move on. This may not be the case when you’re trying to be friends with an ex, that’s why it is essential to be on the lookout for feelings. 

    This is one of the more complex boundaries for being friends with an ex-wife or an ex-husband because when you have a history of being married, catching feelings becomes even easier. Besides this isn’t just about detecting your ex’s feelings but it’s also about controlling your own. You need to control yourself from giving in to the melody of memories. It is one of the most important self-imposed rules for being friends with an ex.

    7. Don’t pay attention to the surrounding judgment 

    There is a lot of stigma surrounding being friends with an ex. People look down on it. They assume that there are residual feelings behind your friendship. Every step of the way you’ll be asked questions like:

    • “So have you moved on and found happiness?” 
    • “Are you sure about this?”
    • “Are you trying to get back together with them?”
    • “Are you guys secretly having sex under the pretense of being friends?” 

    All these questions can make you second-guess your boundaries for being friends with an ex while in a relationship with someone else. You must ignore outside judgment and badgering. If you’re sure that your feelings are gone and that you have no interest in dating them again, then what other people insinuate doesn’t matter. Set this as one of the boundaries for being friends with an ex because at the end of the day, it used to be your relationship and now it’s your friendship. 

    stories on ex and more

    8. Don’t post anything related to your ex on social media accounts

    You and your ex parted ways. What’s the point of posting sad pictures or blaming them for the breakup? Relationships break every single day. That doesn’t mean you’ll post about it on your social media accounts and try to gain some sympathy. This can trigger your ex and they may not want to be friends with you anymore. 

    Furthermore, stop stalking your ex online. Curiosity will get the better of you if you make stalking them your top priority. Who they are dating, where they are taking them on dinner dates, and if they are better looking than you — All of this has nothing to do with you. It won’t help you move on. It’s worse if you have a new partner because it’s unfair to them because you aren’t giving your all to this new relationship. 

    Related Reading: Expert Advice On Coping With Feeling Empty After A Breakup

    9. Don’t give them love advice 

    You are the last person they want love advice from. You need to have healthy boundaries with them and giving them unsolicited love advice isn’t healthy. Their love life has nothing to do with you. They may also feel uncomfortable taking advice from someone they once loved. It’s best to keep your rumination to yourself and not get involved in their current love life. 

    10. Don’t talk about your relationship with their current partner 

    Now that you decided to stay friends, you will be presented with an opportunity where you get to meet your ex’s new partner. Don’t share the things you did with them or what they were like when they were with you with their current lover. It may look like you are trying to make them jealous even if that is never your intention. 

    Let them discover their partner on their own and you enjoy your life the way it is. This is the most important thing about boundaries for being friends with an ex who has moved on and fallen in love again. You don’t want to come across as the heartbroken lover who is still trying their best to win over their ex.

    Key Pointers

    • Your mental health should be your top priority. Don’t accept friendship with your ex if you haven’t healed from the breakup yet
    • While setting healthy boundaries, make sure the two of you stop using each other’s social media accounts and avoid posting about the breakup
    • Be on the lookout for feelings and don’t let outside judgment come in the way of your friendship

    So, that sums up 7 of the most important rules for being friends with an ex. Some of the boundaries for being friends with an ex that you set are more for your mind, the rest are for the both of you. For the ones that need to be followed by both, you need to talk them out and agree on some common ground.

    If you’re someone who’s beginning their friendship with an ex, then you’re about to unfold a new chapter that’d be quite unlike any relationship you’ve had before. Being friends with your ex is going to completely change the way you see them. You’re going to see a side of them that you would have never gotten to see if you were dating them. Things might be a bit awkward in the beginning but eventually, the kinks will get ironed out.

    Don’t dwell too much on the question of why ex wants to be friends. You don’t know their reasons and you may never be able to figure them out. Go with the flow and see where it goes. In the end, hopefully, you’ll be left with a friend who knows you even better than you know yourself. All the best!

    FAQs

    1. Do exes ruin relationships?

    No. Not if you set clear boundaries with them and communicate clearly with them that you don’t want them to ruin your new relationship. If they are a good person and have no ill will against you, then they will let you be and won’t create problems in your love life.

    2. Is it toxic to be friends with an ex?

    Not at all. If the two of you have good intentions, then there’s nothing wrong with being friends. Don’t have any ulterior motive either. It’s not toxic when you are friends with them because you like their company and not because you want them back.

    3. When exes shouldn’t be friends?

    Exes shouldn’t be friends when they still have feelings for each other. They shouldn’t be friends if they have bad blood either. You can’t be friends with an ex when you are secretly wishing for them to take you back as a lover. 

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  • The 7 Phases Of Dating You Go Through Before You’re Officially A Couple

    The 7 Phases Of Dating You Go Through Before You’re Officially A Couple

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    Love can be ambiguous. Love can be strange. The different types of relationships that exist today are a testament to how varied our tastes can be and these have made the dating scene of the modern world an interesting one. The phases of dating seem to shift with each passing year and yesterday’s rules are today’s red flags.  

    People start to wonder where they stand in the scheme of their relationship’s journey. Knowing where you and your partner stand can be reassuring and give you more confidence. Learning about the seven phases of dating and what they entail can also help you understand you may have skirted a few phases and are possibly rushing into a relationship – which is never a good sign. 

    If you’ve ever asked yourself, “What are the phases of dating relationships?”, then this article is designed to give you clarity and help you get an idea of the typical trajectory a relationship takes before becoming official.  

    The 7 Phases Of Dating You Go Through Before You’re Officially A Couple

    You can’t predict everything in life. The relationship timeline too varies greatly from person to person. With that in mind, the phases of dating listed below outline the most common ways a relationship develops before it becomes official. Of course, what constitutes official depends on the couple. 

    For some, official means being in an exclusive relationship defined by a serious commitment where they agree to not see other people. Others wait for the honeymoon phase to get over and for things to settle down before calling it official. The journey to becoming an “Official Couple” is not straightforward. 

    A lot of times, people skip several stages of a relationship and its development while others stay friends or keep things casual and undefined for long periods. If you feel like your relationship doesn’t match exactly with what you read here or elsewhere on the internet, don’t worry.  There aren’t any rigid rules to the game of love. Even so, an insight into the different phases of dating will make sure you aren’t constantly losing sleep over “what are we?” or “where is this going?”:   

    For more expert-backed insights, subscribe to our YouTube channel. Click here.

    1. The crush phase

    This is objectively one of the first stages of a relationship but you may be wondering why a simple crush is counted as a phase in the dating world. Well, any relationship needs a spark that precedes everything else. Many consider a crush to be that spark and one of the first phases of dating relationships. 

    In this first stage, you fall in love with the way the person behaves, their qualities, and attributes. For some, this ‘superficial’ connection can be instantaneous. For others, it may grow over several weeks or months of spending time together. Some obvious signs that you are crushing on someone are

    • Infatuation: It is common to be confused and wonder, “Am I in love or infatuated?” Infatuation refers to the strong desire you have for a person you are attracted to. Even though you may not know much about the person, you are still fascinated and in love with their personality, looks, or other observable characteristics
    • Fantasies about your future together:  This often brings with it opposing emotions such as excitement and nervousness. The former stems from the possibility of a future together, and the latter, from the worry if your feelings will be reciprocated. During this time, you may find yourself thinking about the honeymoon phase of romance –going on vacations together, what life would look like with them as your partner, and other such visions
    • Difficulty focusing on other tasks: When a crush is really strong, people are often distracted and unable to concentrate. This is obviously because you can’t stop thinking about them for hours on end. People typically move out of this phase when someone decides to take things forward

    Related Reading: The 4 Bases In Relationships That We Unanimously Agree On

    2. The talking phase

    The talking phase of a relationship is the time before romantic feelings become more evident. You enjoy conversations and begin to hang out with them more and form impressions of each other. 

    In this second stage, you spend time together, talking to each other in a group or one-on-one setting, which gradually starts to fuel the chemistry between you two. How long should the talking stage last? As long as it needs to! Talking is essential as you are getting to know each other and gauging compatibility with each exchange.  

    One can consider this to be a sort of undefined stage being that it’s tough to guess where the two of you stand with each other and whether it’s time to take the next step toward a romantic relationship. If you do feel strongly that the other person is also into you and you wish to move to the next stage, here are some things you can do:

    1. Use “we” language to show that you see a future together: For example, a statement like “I really enjoy spending time with you. We should do this more often”
    2. Pay attention to body language and its role in your dynamic: The other person may give off subtle signs that they are open and ready to pursue a romantic relationship with you. Look for positive body language and listen for verbal cues that indicate their interest. Some examples of this include prolonged eye contact, flirting, and even light physical contact such as brushing of arms, lingering hugs, etc.
    3. Decide to risk awkwardness: There is a chance that you have misunderstood the signs from their side. Be ready to accept that the other person may not be romantically interested in you. Think about the consequences of how deciding to directly ask them out would affect your connection. If you still think they’re worth it, then go ahead and ask them out boldly

    3. The pre-dating phase

    As you go through the first three phases of dating, underlying currents clearly get stronger. You can feel the air getting thick with attraction or even sexual tension and you might sense that your relationship is no longer simply one of “friendship”. Instead, you are now in a “mutual attraction stage” and are starting to connect on a more romantic level. 

    You start to realize it’s important to be a good listener and listen intently when they speak. You might even notice them doing the same thing. There is a clear reversal of dynamics compared to the crush phase. It is no longer only you who finds reasons to hang around them, as now, your romantic interest also takes initiative and enjoys being in your presence.  Some common real-world examples that you might notice in this stage:

    • “What’re you up to” esque messages being sent and received frequently
    • Your personal space starts to include them and you notice that you don’t mind it when you get physically close to each other

    Once you have gotten over the initial awkward stage of seeing each other romantically, you can start working on deepening your relationship, which sets the stage for the actual dating phase. Try not to get too ahead of yourself and start wondering, “How many dates before intimacy can happen?”  For now, keep it simple and enjoy activities that aren’t particularly romantic in nature. Some shared activity ideas you can try before going on a classic first date are:

    • Volunteer together: Many people find that helping others can be a very rewarding way to bond. Look for local volunteer opportunities or support a cause that you are both passionate about
    • Attending events or festivals: Going to a concert, a fair, a sports event, or any kind of community event can be a fun way to spend time together and explore your shared interests
    • Taking a class together: Signing up for a class together can be a great way to learn, get to know each other, and connect with your partner on a deeper level. These classes could involve cooking, dancing, or any other hobby that’s light-hearted enough
    • Going for a walk or hike: Being outdoors and exploring nature can be a great way to enjoy each other’s company. Conversations during a walk or a hike are surprisingly meaningful and can reveal new aspects of your potential partner
    • Going out for a casual meal: This could be a great way to get to know each other over some good food and conversation

    Engaging in these activities allows you to learn about your shared values and build rapport. These can also be useful to assess if he or she is the right person and a potential partner for a long-term relationship. This is also a good time to set some personal growth goals and improve any areas of yourself that need to change. Think of it as a sort of preparation for the honeymoon phase that the new relationship is about to bring.

    Related Reading: 10 Critical Emotional Needs In A Relationship

    4. The dating phase

    After completing three phases of dating in your relationship timeline, this fourth phase is one of the biggest milestones you can reach. You have now established without a doubt that you are more than friends. You have also started evaluating their compatibility with you for a long-term relationship.

    In this fourth stage, you have either implicitly or explicitly acknowledged that romantic feelings exist and the two of you begin a journey to discover where it leads. It’s at this time that people normally have the long-awaited “romantic first date”. Activities that you engage in from now on take a more romantic tone than before.

    During this phase, couples spend significant amounts of time together, getting to each other’s likes and dislikes, values, and personalities. They enjoy the process of planning romantic dates and it feels like every moment together just makes the connection stronger. The first few dates can be amazing and you are thrilled that you have potentially found someone perfect. Enjoy and cherish these memories as much as possible. During this stage, one needs to keep in mind that not everyone moves at the same speed. 

    For instance, one partner may prefer to spend a long time in the dating phase while the other may be wondering why the relationship isn’t moving forward. As you can imagine, communication would be of utmost importance here. This phase is also a time when boundaries are established and expectations are made known. These can include aspects such as:

    • Time spent together: Couples may set boundaries around how much time they spend together, how often partners see each other, and when they need some alone time. Sometimes hanging around 24/7 even with your best friend can get emotionally draining
    • Physical intimacy: Physical intimacy can be an important aspect of a relationship but the question “how many dates before intimacy can happen?” can leave you unsure about whether or not to act on your desires. The answer depends on what feels right to you and the person you’re dating
    • Relationship goals: It’s a great sign if you or your partner want to discuss relationship goals and what you hope to achieve together. It’s important that both partners have a clear understanding of each other’s goals for the relationship and the future
    • Independence: Getting burnt out with shared activities is a serious risk. It doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. Every person needs to have time for their hobbies, friends, and activities without feeling guilty

    Creating good memories together helps you see that the other person is worth sticking with through thick or thin, and this comes in handy during challenging times. 

    Related Reading: 13 Sure-Shot Signs A Casual Relationship Is Getting Serious

    5. The vulnerability phase

    During the fifth phase of dating, couples often open up to each other to build trust, intimacy, and understanding. Some look forward to this stage and feel eager to open up to their partner. However, not everyone is comfortable with being vulnerable with a man or woman. Understanding that this is a vital part of strengthening a relationship and giving each other the space to approach it at a pace you’re each comfortable with is essential. 

    Being vulnerable involves honesty and transparency about one’s thoughts, feelings, and intentions. Vulnerability also means being upfront about what one is looking for in a relationship and what one’s goals are. The reason why this stage doesn’t happen earlier is that vulnerability requires trust. You are more likely to be vulnerable with someone you trust and when the other person has demonstrated that they are not judgmental and won’t use the things you share with them in confidence against you. 

    Up until this stage, people put their best selves forward, in an attempt to woo and impress their romantic interest with their charismatic side. Seeing your partner open up and reveal their true self bolsters your confidence so much that you begin to connect deeply with them and believe that he or she is the one for you. When the core aspects that define who you are, are respected and cherished, it tremendously strengthens your relationship and can be a powerful contributor to intimacy. 

    6. The challenge phase

    As your relationship progresses through the different stages of love, you enter the challenge phase. Small relationship problems start to emerge now and how each partner handles the situation will determine how conflicts will be resolved in the future as well. The challenge phase usually starts once the honeymoon phase is over and it can truly test the bond and strength of a relationship.

    Disagreements, conflicts, and arguments are a normal part of any relationship, and flexibly dealing with them proves to each partner that the other isn’t going to bail out at the first sign of tough times. 

    What are some common challenges that couples are likely to face at this stage?

    Challenges in a dating relationship can occur in a variety of situations and with different levels of complexity. Let’s look at some of the most common relationship challenges almost everyone has to face: 

    • Communication breakdown: Miscommunication and lack of effective communication can be major sources of conflict in any relationship. Couples may struggle to express their thoughts and feelings effectively, leading to misunderstandings. One of the biggest reasons this happens is that people hide their true feelings for the sake of upholding the peace and when they are unable to keep suppressing their feelings, it leads to an unpleasant lashing out or arguments. As you can imagine, open communication is key in this stage
    • Trust issues: Trust is crucial to building a strong foundation of any relationship. When broken, it can be very difficult to repair. Trust issues arise from several factors but most commonly involve infidelity or perceived infidelity, dishonesty, or from one partner consistently breaking promises
    • Financial stress: Money can be a major source of stress for couples. Arguments about finances due to differences in spending habits, disagreements about how to handle money, or financial difficulties all create an uncomfortable and difficult dynamic to navigate
    • Different expectations and goals: As people grow and change, their expectations and goals for the relationship may also change. This causes people to feel like their partner is betraying them or going back on their word, which leads to misunderstandings, disagreements, and disappointment
    •  Lack of quality time together: When couples are busy with work, family, and other obligations, it can be difficult to find time to be together. Studies have repeatedly found that partners who spend more time communicating with each other experience greater satisfaction and intimacy. A lack of quality time and limited communication can lead to feelings of disconnection and dissatisfaction in the relationship
    • Inflexibility and lack of compromise: Sometimes people struggle to compromise on important issues and may have difficulty being flexible. Being able to adapt to changes in a relationship is an important skill to develop. A partner who is often rigid and wants things to always go their way can lead to feelings of frustration and unfulfillment in the relationship
    • Power struggles: This is when one partner starts to exert more dominance than the other prefers. It can be an uncomfortable moment where the one being dominated feels disrespected. Addressing these feelings immediately can prevent deep resentment from taking hold 

    Related Reading: Dating Vs Relationship – 8 Subtle Differences You Never Knew About

    7. The commitment phase

    If you managed to make it through the previous stage, congratulations, you are at the final stage of your dating journey. You have spent enough time with each other and have a deep understanding of each other’s personality, habits, views on life, politics, and other aspects that are important to you. 

    Deciding that you are officially a couple is a major step in your relationship journey. Couples often make some sort of public announcement or share the news of being in a committed relationship with their friends and family. Sharing this information conveys that you view the other person as an integral part of your life. 

    You may also have discussed and found clarity on long-term plans such as living together or a timeline for marriage or any other form of commitment.

    Some key features of this final stage include:

    • Accepting your partner the way they are: You have come to love them as a whole; with all their perfections and imperfections
    • You approach life together: When you are in a committed relationship, you make joint decisions and plans about the future. Life experiences from here on out are going to be shared and experienced with a mutual commitment
    • Commitment to resolving issues: You and your partner have recognized areas of conflict and are committed to putting in the work to resolve challenges and growing together as a couple. You also go out of your comfort zone and put in the effort to create emotional intimacy in your romantic relationship
    • A deeper level of communication: You listen to each other not just to hear but also to understand their perspectives and what the other is trying to convey on a deeper level. You have developed a sort of advanced empathy toward each other

    These are just some of the signs you’re in a committed relationship.

    Key Pointers

    • There are several phases of dating people go through before they become an official couple
    • An official couple refers to an exclusive relationship that has gone through various stages of love during the dating phase
    • Trust is key in allowing one to be vulnerable with the other. Vulnerability, in turn, leads to stronger emotions and connection in the intimacy stage
    • It’s a good sign when your partner prefers to talk things through instead of keeping quiet. This shows they value open communication even if it can be uncomfortable at times
    • The challenging phase makes us go out of our comfort zone and deliberately work on resolving conflicts and disagreements productively and positively
    • Once a couple makes it through the challenge phase of dating, they are considered to be in a committed relationship

    We hope this article has given you some clarity to navigate the early stages of a romantic relationship. Naturally, it’s important to keep in mind that every couple is unique and their timeline in progressing through the phases may vary. Some couples may move quickly through the early stages and find themselves in a committed relationship after only a few months, while others may take years to build a strong foundation of trust and intimacy. Regardless of how fast or slow things move, always take moments to pause, breathe and reflect on the wonder that is love.

    What Is Not Love But Thought As Love? 15 Such Things

    13 Lesser-Known Psychological Facts About Soulmates

    How To Use Words Of Affirmation As A Love Language?

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  • 12  Valentine’s Day Date Ideas for Couples on a Budget

    12 Valentine’s Day Date Ideas for Couples on a Budget

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    Escape rooms have been popular for several years and are a lot of fun, but at $30+ per person, they make a pretty expensive date. Corey and I have found that we like escape rooms in a box. You can find them at most stores that sell board games, and they range from beginner to expert levels. Intermediate ones tend to be our favorites. They give us a little challenge, but not so much of a challenge that our brains hurt by the end. Many escape rooms recommend more than two participants, so this may be a good one for a double date. Invite another couple over and have a Valentine’s Day date together.

    11. Workout Together

    Exercising may not come to many minds when they think about date ideas, but it can be a lot of fun. Many rec centers and YMCAs offer single-day passes. Find one near you and plan a workout you can do together, play some one-on-one on the basketball court, or reserve a racquetball court for an hour or two. You might even be able to find one with a swimming pool and/or a sauna so you can end your evening with a relaxing dip or a little sitting in a steam room.

    12. Do Some Intentional Life Planning

    Prior to Valentine’s Day, individually think about and write down some life goals. Then on Valentine’s Day, discuss your thoughts, and talk about ways to help each other reach those goals. You may have spiritual goals, like studying a certain book of the Bible or memorizing a specific passage. You might want to make saving for a family vacation a priority. Or maybe you want to work toward running your first 10K. The ideas may vary, but the key is to find ways to work together and encourage each other.

    Looking at the big picture, it doesn’t really matter what romantic thing we do on Valentine’s Day or even if we do anything at all on that specific day. What does matter is that we are proactive in our marriage relationship. Every time we eat a meal together, go dancing together, read the Bible together, or watch Monday Night football together, we are building our relationship. The important thing is to be intentional about your time with your spouse, regardless of what that intentional time looks like.

    Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/fizkes

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    Kim Harms

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  • Is it Pride That Keeps Us from Forgiving Ourselves?

    Is it Pride That Keeps Us from Forgiving Ourselves?

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    Forgiveness is not an option for Christians — the Bible teaches — it’s mandatory.

    As Jesus teaches in Matthew 6:14-15, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

    The Apostle Paul, in Ephesians 4:32, urges, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

    Scripture is clear that it doesn’t mean once but over and over. “Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them,” Jesus says in Luke 17:3-4.

    But what about when it comes to ourselves? It’s one thing to forgive another person, but what about when we have sinned? Sometimes, we have a difficult time extending forgiveness to ourselves, even as we are able to forgive others.

    In 1 John 1:9, we’re taught that if we confess our sins, God “will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”

    Yet perhaps we struggle, thinking we’re too “bad” or that our sin is somehow exceptional, that God shouldn’t forgive us, or that even if he does, we shouldn’t accept that forgiveness or forgive ourselves sin in turn.

    Is it pride that keeps us from forgiving ourselves?

    It is indeed usually pride that stands in our way, preventing us from accepting the gift of forgiveness God offers each one of us.

    What Is Forgiveness?

    In the Bible, forgiveness is a release or dismissal of something, such as when charges are dropped against a person in court.

    In Matthew 6:14, the original text is the word aphiēmi, from the root aphesis, meaning remittance or forgiveness. Another meaning is dismissal, a sending away.

    Basically, we are to get rid of, put off, dismiss, or send away any negative feelings or debt. In essence, the slate is wiped clean, and the person can start anew as if it never happened and no punishment awaits.

    Romans 8:1 tells us there is “no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”

    Similarly, in Colossians 1:14, we’re told that in Jesus, we have “redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”

    Just before Jesus died, he said, “It is finished.” That the word translated as “finished” is actually teleō, which means to complete, fulfill, or pay off, as in a debt. Forgiveness is, then, letting a sin or penalty go completely, erasing it forever.

    We are to do this to others — and to ourselves.

    What Is Pride?

    Pride in the Bible is typically an over-absorption with ourselves, considering ourselves superior to or outside of the typical. It’s an exaggerated sense of our own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority.

    Pride’s opposite is humility. The Bible is clear that God hates pride, and pride is a sin.

    Proverbs 16:18 tells us, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.”

    In Luke 14:11, Jesus says, “For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

    Isaiah elaborates, “The Lord Almighty planned it, to bring down her pride in all her splendor and to humble all who are renowned on the earth” (Isaiah 23:9).

    Pride isn’t just thinking we are great or even on par with God. It’s also thinking we are an exception to the norm or we are somehow different or special outside of the graces and gifts God gave to us.

    Adam and Eve exhibited pride in the Garden of Eden when they were tempted to believe they could be like God and ate the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil (Genesis 3).

    We exhibit pride when we think we are above the law (whether God’s or human law) or better or more deserving than others in some way.

    As 1 Corinthians 4:7 puts it, “For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?”

    Why Does Pride Keep Us from Forgiving Ourselves?

    At its core, pride rejects the gift of grace that God extends to us, and that is why it is such a sin. It is a self-imposed wall between the Lord and us.

    While we might know intellectually that God forgives people for doing wrong things, we perhaps think something along the lines of, “But I knew better. I shouldn’t have done this. I wouldn’t forgive me if I were God.”

    That’s the crux, that notion of “if I were God.” For we must understand that none of us is God, nor can we ever come close. If God, the Alpha and Omega, beginning and end, and creator of the universe, chooses to bestow the gift of forgiveness on anyone who repents and believes, why do we believe we have the power to do anything but accept that gift?

    When we punish ourselves by denying us self-compassion, we’re, in essence, “playing God.”

    Or perhaps we think punishing ourselves prevents us from doing the same thing over and over. By beating ourselves up and not forgiving ourselves, we hold on to the sin, and in a sense, it’s a way of avoiding genuine repentance.

    Repentance is recognizing we did wrong and then striving to walk in a new way. It’s taking that new and better path, living for the “new self,” that new creation in Christ, that Paul talks about in 2 Corinthians 5:17 and Ephesians 4:24.

    Not forgiving ourselves is an attempt to cling to the old self, even as we publish ourselves for what that old self did.

    Why Should We Forgive Ourselves?

    God calls us to embrace humility and acceptance. The humble heart not only acknowledges that God is Lord but also accepts with grace and gratitude all that God bestows.

    Fighting against what God wants — forgiveness — is actually not true punishment of ourselves but rather disrespect toward the Lord Almighty.

    Forgiveness translates to acceptance. When we forgive others, we accept that God wants us to set aside anger, wrath, judgment, or any other consequence or negative emotion toward another person.

    When we forgive ourselves, it’s much the same. We accept God’s gracious actions and intentions toward us. We enter into a right and righteous relationship with God because we honor and heed his wishes.

    We accept his love.

    It’s not about fixing poor self-image or struggles with self-worth, but rather about accepting that God has chosen to forgive us.

    Who, then, are we to challenge God’s plan and God’s will?

    Does Forgiveness Tie in with Love?

    Forgiveness is part of love. When asked about the greatest commandment in the law, Jesus pointed to love, telling us,

    “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments” (Matthew 22:37-40).

    Part of loving our neighbor is forgiving our neighbor. Part of loving ourselves is forgiving ourselves.

    God commands us to love him, love our neighbor, and love ourselves. We are an important part of that. When we deny ourselves forgiveness, we are not effectively loving ourselves and hence, not following God’s commands.

    One might wonder whether the Apostle Paul, who had much to say about forgiveness, struggled with accepting God’s grace and mercy for his own sins.

    After all, though he was instrumental in the development and spread of the early church, at one point, he was an enemy of the church, arresting and imprisoning followers of Jesus before his own conversion to Christianity.

    However, Paul is clear in his letter to Timothy that he, too, is forgiven, as are we all. There is no sin too big or too bad for God’s perfect, cleansing liberation.

    If you are having trouble forgiving yourself for something you did wrong, consider reflecting on these words from Psalm 103:10-14:

    He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.

    Amen. Thanks be to God.

    For further reading:

    Why Is it So Hard to Forgive Ourselves?

    What Does it Mean for Christians to Forgive?

    Does God Really Forgive Our Sins?

    Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/Koldunov


    Jessica Brodie is an award-winning Christian novelist, journalist, editor, blogger, and writing coach and the recipient of the 2018 American Christian Fiction Writers Genesis Award for her novel, The Memory Garden. She is also the editor of the South Carolina United Methodist Advocate, the oldest newspaper in Methodism. Learn more about her fiction and read her faith blog at jessicabrodie.com. She has a weekly YouTube devotional, too. You can also connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, and more. She’s also produced a free eBook, A God-Centered Life: 10 Faith-Based Practices When You’re Feeling Anxious, Grumpy, or Stressed.

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    Jessica Brodie

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  • 10 Ways to Sabotage Your Marriage (Without Realizing It)

    10 Ways to Sabotage Your Marriage (Without Realizing It)

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    She looked smoking hot and she knew it. Blonde. Curvaceous. Suede stilettos with a way-too-short leather skirt. Beckoning green eyes and a killer smile to match. She wanted everyone’s attention in the room and boy, she got it (including mine).

    She floated through the crowd, giggling with one group and then another. Finally, she sauntered over toward a group of men—one of whom was my husband. Before she walked away, she patted his arm with her graceful, manicured hand—maybe a little too much.

    Really?

    She probably meant nothing by it, but after the party my husband and I talked about the situation, laughed a little and moved on. Although this happened years ago, I’m glad we chose to talk about it and reassure each other, rather than pretend like it didn’t happen. Recognizing and talking about things (or people) that might sabotage our marriage helps us protect it.

    I wish we’d done that even more.

    After 31 years of marriage, I’ve learned a lot of things not to do, both by observing others and by making a lot of mistakes, myself. And I’m still learning. With each anniversary, my appreciation grows for our beautiful, quirky and sometimes less-than-perfect relationship. I want to guard what we have and work to make it better.

    I’m sure you do, too.

    While nobody sets out to sabotage their marriage, it’s not that hard to do. And often, we may not realize that we’re doing any damage at all—until it’s too late. Here are ten ways to sabotage your marriage that I’ve learned to avoid.

    Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/dragana991

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    May Patterson

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  • Why Spicing Up Your Sex Life Works, Explained By Science – Sex Positive

    Why Spicing Up Your Sex Life Works, Explained By Science – Sex Positive

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    Why Spicing Up Your Sex Life Works, Explained By Science – Sex Positive


















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    Monica Pierce

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  • Why Men Have It Harder

    Why Men Have It Harder

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    Why Men Have It Harder

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    Tripp Advice

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  • Penis Enlargement Surgery Explained – AskMen

    Penis Enlargement Surgery Explained – AskMen

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    Penis Enhancement Procedures Are Becoming a Big Thing — Here’s Everything You Need to Know

    If there is one thing in the world that no man would ever turn down, it’s the opportunity to boast a bigger penis. Sure, we work with what God, the universe, genetics, or whatever you may believe in gave us, but swinging around a larger, more impressive member has seemed nothing short of an unattainable fantasy…until now.

    Enter the delightfully punny “SWAG” procedure (Shafer Width and Girth), which was named after the surgeon who specializes in it, Dr. David Shafer of New York’s Shafer Clinic Fifth Avenue.

    This easy, 20-30 minute series of injectables, typically performed under local anesthesia, not only increases the penis circumference, but may also elongate it due to its newfound heaviness.

    But what exactly does the process of dilating a dick entail? We chatted with Shafer himself for a breakdown on why this may just be the cosmetic procedure for you.

    RELATED: Average Erect Penis Girth and Length


    Penis Enlargement vs. Elongation


    Girth or length? That is the question. And while both are achievable through surgery or fillers, the former typically yields a much more successful outcome that can also add an inch or two of length in the process.

    “Lengthening procedures are used which ‘cut the ligament’ but they are often not successful or leave scars and have high recurrence rates,” reveals Shafer. “Most people actually come in looking for girth more than length and that is where the SWAG procedure has become very popular.”

    “However, an added benefit over time is elongation from the added weight of the filler stretching the length of the penis,” he adds. “Many men report an added inch of length over a year of two treatments.”


    How to Cosmetically Enlarge a Penis


    The act of enlarging a penis with filler is actually less complicated than one may think. While ladies enhance their bodies through more invasive breast augmentations and Brazilian butt lifts, gents can be in and out of the doctor’s office in under 30 minutes with practically zero recovery time.

    To achieve a fatter phallus, Shafer utilizes a microcannula to inject widely-used fillers through two small incision sites.

    “The most popular fillers are Voluma, Volux and Bellafill,” confirms Shafer. “The products are all FDA-approved for face injections and have great safety profiles.”

    While this is certainly the most popular approach, there are other, less common ways to achieve desired results.

    “Other procedures include fat grafting to the penis, which requires a liposuction procedure to obtain the fat for injection,” says Shafer. “A silicone sheath can also be injected under the skin of the penis, but this also requires a surgical procedure and a visible scar.”


    Who Is Interested in Penis Enlargement?


    Before writing this off as a procedure exclusive to porn stars and men with the ever-so-unfortunate micropenis, think again.

    “I have found that most men are curious about options for enhancing their penis,” says Shafer. “There is not one demographic or certain patient that is interested — it’s universal…gay, straight, married, single, etc.”

    In fact, penis enhancement procedures have seen an exponential rise in popularity. Shafer claims that his clinic alone has experienced a 200 percent increase year over year, becoming one of the most sought-after treatments in the practice.

    “We perform, on average, 20 per week,” he says. “I think the gain in popularity has been through increased exposure on social media and internet chat rooms discussing the procedure.”

    “Also, through new cannula technologies which help produce a smoother result and dermal fillers such as Voluma and Volux, which give long term predictable results and the ability to ‘melt’ or dissolve the product if desired,” he adds.


    How Long Do Penis Enlargement Results Last?


    While the final objective of the SWAG procedure is girth enhancement through volume injection, it does require frequent tune-ups.

    “In most cases, a patient will have one to three treatments to achieve their goals and then annual maintenance,” says Shafer.

    This is important for patients to keep in mind, both from a financial and time perspective, as results are not typically permanent.


    Risks of Penis Enlargement Procedures


    Before pumping your pecker, it’s also important to be aware of the risks associated.

    “Any procedure has inherent risks,” reminds Shafer. “Every patient should expect some swelling and possible bruising. Infection is a rare risk and is increased in heavy smokers and patients with poor hygiene.”

    “Dermal fillers also have a risk of intravascular injection leading to tissue necrosis. This is very rare with risk reduced with experience of the injector, injection technique, and use of the cannula instead of sharp needles,” he adds.

    Additionally, filler should not have any effect on the quality of an erection.

    “At first, the erection may not stand up as tall from the added weight, but patients gain strength and are back to normal over several weeks,” says Shafer. “It’s important to go to a well-trained and qualified injector. Penis injections are complex and should not be performed by new or inexperienced injectors.”

    Needless to stay, this innovative procedure has us all standing at attention.

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    Joey

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  • How to Navigate Infertility – Caring Therapists of Broward

    How to Navigate Infertility – Caring Therapists of Broward

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    Films and television shows would have us believe that conceiving a child is the easiest thing in the world. For some this may be true. But for many couples, getting pregnant seems almost impossible.

    And so we seek the help and guidance from fertility specialists, convinced modern technology will help us create the family we’ve been dreaming of. We begin treatments with the hope that one of them will finally take.

    Along the way, we feel a multitude of emotions, from shame and guilt to fear and sadness. Oh, and let’s not forget the unmitigated mental exhaustion.

    If you are going through your own infertility journey and can relate to all of this, here are some tips to help you navigate:

    You’re Not Alone

    If all of your friends are having babies, your relatives have had babies, and it seems like the whole world (but you) is having babies, understand that you are not alone. In fact, according to the CDC, one in eight couples in America struggles to get pregnant or sustain a pregnancy.

    Do Your Homework

    Before beginning infertility treatments, be sure you do some solid research. You want to look for not only a clinic with a track record of live birth outcomes that is attached to excellent labs, you also want to find a doctor that you connect with and feel comfortable with. Ask your OBGYN to connect you with someone. You may also want to ask around your group of friends to find a personal recommendation.

    Self-Care

    The healthier you are, the better your chances of becoming pregnant. It’s easy to let stress build-up, and then give in to those comfort food cravings. But now is the time to take optimal care of your mind, body and spirit. Eat whole foods, drink plenty of filtered water and get plenty of rest. Stay away from toxic people and situations and prioritize your well-being.

    You may also find it helpful to speak with a therapist who can help you navigate the powerful emotions you and your partner are feeling. I help couples who are struggling with infertility stay positive and mentally healthy. I’d love to help you, too.

    SOURCES:

    https://www.premamawellness.com/blogs/blog/what-i-learned-to-expect-from-not-expecting-6-tips-on-how-to-navigate-infertility-and-find-community

    Even Miracles Take a Little Time: How to Navigate Infertility the Smart Way

    How to Navigate the Emotions of Infertility

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    Amanda Landry

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  • Issues LGBTQ Students Experience in School – Caring Therapists of Broward

    Issues LGBTQ Students Experience in School – Caring Therapists of Broward

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    Growing up is hard for just about every kid. But it can be particularly hard if you are LGBTQ+. School can be especially tricky to navigate, as these youths face unique challenges.

    Here are some of the most common issues LGBTQ+ students experience in school:

    Bullying

    LGBTQ+ youths are far more likely to be the targets of bullying, whether that bullying happens in school hallways or on social media. On any given day LGBTQ+ students may face name calling, threats, or even acts of physical violence. And perhaps the worst part is, these may come from other students as well as teachers and staff.

    Harassment

    Technically speaking, harassing someone for their sexual orientation or gender identity is illegal. That hardly keeps people from doing it. Harassment at school often causes a toxic and hostile environment, hardly one in which learning is easy.

    Discrimination

    There’s discipline, and then there’s discrimination. Often LGBTQ+ youth are disciplined for things their peers are not. For instance, two same-sex students showing affection in the hallway may be disciplined when heterosexual couples are not treated the same way.

    Loneliness

    It is common for LGBTQ+ students to feel lonely and isolated in school, depending on where they go to school. While there may be other LGBTQ+ students and staff in schools in bigger cities, those students who live in rural areas may feel absolutely alone.

    Education is a very big part of the adolescent experience, and days spent in school are some of the most formative of our lives. If you or someone you know is an LGBTQ+ student and facing these types of issues and you’d like to speak to someone, please reach out to me. I work with members of the LGBTQ+ community to help them navigate the unique challenges they face in the word today.

    SOURCES:

    Promoting LGBTQ students’ well-being in schools

    https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/inclusive-mental-health/lgbtq-youth-problems-faced-in-schools/

    https://www.psychologytoday.com/za/blog/communication-success/202102/10-challenges-lgbtq-students-face-in-schools

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    Amanda Landry

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  • Beginner’s Guide to Focusing on Mental Health – Caring Therapists of Broward

    Beginner’s Guide to Focusing on Mental Health – Caring Therapists of Broward

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    These days, many people focus on their physical health. But few give much attention, if any, to their mental health.

    What does mental health refer to? Mental health describes a person’s overall psychological health and well-being. It has much to do with the way you feel about yourself, your ability to manage your emotions, how you deal with challenges and the relationships you nurture.

    While most people will experience mental health challenges at some point in their life, those who give no attention to their mental health could experience anxiety and depression. If focusing on mental health is a new topic for you, here are some tips to help you along:

    Don’t Isolate

    Nothing keeps our mood elevated like the feeling of being connected – truly connected – to other people. While texting and social media have their place, be sure to spend quality face-to-face time with friends and loved ones.

    Make R&R a Priority

    Are you someone that burns the candle at both ends? Most people are. Good mental health requires you to get enough leisure time so you can rest and contemplate. If you’re guilty of being “too busy,” start spending more time relaxing.

    Eat Healthy

    Have you ever noticed when you eat processed comfort foods, you tend to feel unwell physically and mentally? Sugary foods are bad for our mental health. That’s why it’s so important to eat wholesome, nutritious foods like grassfed meats and organic fruits and veggies!

    Stay Active 

    Physical activity is as important for your mental health as it is for your physical health. Regular exercise can relieve stress, elevate mood, and even help you get a better night’s sleep.

    These are just some of the ways you can ensure your mental health is optimized. You may also want to speak with a licensed mental health therapist who can provide tools and a safe space to work through what’s troubling you.

    If you’d like to explore treatment options, please give my office a call.

    SOURCES:

    http://www.bcmhsus.ca/about/news-stories/stories/10-tips-to-boost-your-mental-health

    https://www.mhanational.org/31-tips-boost-your-mental-health

    https://www.verywellmind.com/things-you-can-do-to-improve-your-mental-focus-4115389

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    Amanda Landry

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  • 24 Inspiring Respect Quotes to Make Your Motto

    24 Inspiring Respect Quotes to Make Your Motto

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    Respect and love go hand in hand. Knowing your partner values your voice and opinions despite having different ones themselves is a type of intimacy that encourages you to be who you are. Respect in a relationship nurtures feelings of trust and safety.

    Love can sometimes change by the day. You’ve fought and maybe you don’t love them as much at that moment, but respect is something that should always be there no matter how you feel about that person.

    Read a curated list of 24 quotes about respect by greats such as Confucius and Mahatma Gandhi to show its importance.



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  • 9 Sure Signs Your Wife Is Changing Her Mind About Divorce

    9 Sure Signs Your Wife Is Changing Her Mind About Divorce

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    You seem to have hit a wall in your marriage. There have been ugly spats and words exchanged and the dreaded “D” word has been spoken. Despair hangs heavy over your marriage and you’re wondering if this is the end. And then, there are signs. Signs of wife changing her mind about divorce. Or so you hope. Given everything that’s been happening, you’re still uncertain and you’re wondering, “Do wives change their mind about divorce at all?”

    Well, human nature is inconsistent, even about major life decisions like divorce. So yes, it is entirely possible that there are concrete signs your wife is changing her mind about divorce. With the help of psychotherapist Sampreeti Das (Master in Clinical Psychology and Ph.D. Researcher), who specializes in Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy and Holistic and Transformational Psychotherapy, we’ve rounded up some signs your wife is rethinking divorce and is open to giving your marriage another chance.

    How Do I Know If My Wife Is Changing Her Mind About Divorce?

    “We decided to end things because of how incompatible we got. Though it broke my heart to be talking to lawyers, I tried my best to keep it together. One night, after a few nasty calls with our respective lawyers, I broke down in front of her and told her how rough it is to be going through this,” Mack told us.

    “Though I never thought too much about will my wife change her mind about divorce and never even asked her to reconsider, I could see a few signs of second thoughts about divorce in her since then. We started talking a lot more, and we realized we might just be able to give it another shot. This time, we made sure to focus on prioritizing the things that make a relationship work,” he added.

    When you’re in a similar situation, asking her will she change her mind may not seem like the best idea. Too much has been said, and too much has gone unsaid. You’re hoping for sure signs your wife is changing her mind about divorce, but all you can do right now is wait, watch and wonder. We’re here to bolster your spirit a little with 9 sure signs your wife is changing her mind about the divorce:

    1. Better communication

    It’s been said so often, it sounds like a cliché, but a true one! Communication truly is the key to a healthy relationship, and communication problems and breakdowns are often at the root of a failing or stumbling marriage. It’s natural that your marriage got to where it is due to poor communication. It’s also possible that, of late, there have been cold silences or fights, or snarky barbs exchanged, but that’s it. And then suddenly, it changes.

    “My wife Elena and I had been at loggerheads for months,” says Logan. “We just weren’t talking, except to yell at each other or blame shift, or just generally be nasty. There was a complete communication breakdown, and divorce definitely seemed to be on the cards. But then, after nearly 6 months of this, there was a subtle shift in Elena’s behavior. And it got me wondering, “Will she change her mind about divorce?”.”

    Logan saw his wife starting to ask how his day had been. She would listen when he talked about work, she would talk about her frustration with her own job, a fight she’d had with her mom. Slowly, it progressed to a place where they could communicate about what had gone wrong with them, their love and their marriage.

    If you’re looking for signs your wife is rethinking divorce, the fact that she has started communicating better is definitely a positive indicator. It means that she cares enough about you and your marriage to make an effort. This is certainly a positive step toward fixing your broken marriage and changing your mind about splitting up.

    “Language conduct speaks volumes about one’s intentions,” says Sampreeti, “If a partner’s communication content and tone are changing for the better, it is entirely possible they are having second thoughts about their decision to get a divorce. They may not always admit to having second thoughts directly; instead, they could talk about common concerns such as the children, things to do with the household and so on, showing that they’re thinking of the things that hold you together.”

    2. Sudden physical intimacy

    Sexual overtures, touch and affection are some of the first things to go out the window when a marriage hits a rough spot. If things have gotten to the point where divorce is being brought up, we’re guessing you two haven’t had a whole lot of sexy time lately. Or even the simple gesture of holding hands or a touch on the arm.

    Now, if that changes, it’s entirely possible that you’re wondering, “Is my wife having second thoughts about divorce?” Is she sitting closer to you on the couch when you’re watching TV after dinner? Does she place a hand on your arm when trying to explain something to you? Is there a lot of meaningful eye contact over the dinner table? And most of all, in bed, is she suddenly showing a lot of interest in making love?

    Though it might have seemed like you couldn’t change your spouse’s mind about divorce, a few positive body language signs might tell you otherwise. Apart from all that’s going on in the bedroom, take note of her general demeanor around you as well. Is she more open with her body language? Does she appear inviting and affable?

    Physical intimacy is one of the foundations of any healthy relationship, and the loss of it can be a root cause for a marriage to hit a major stumbling block. So, if after months of zero physical contact and affection, your wife starts making overtures, it’s a great sign she still desires you, is interested in making the marriage work, and therefore is reconsidering divorce.

    3. She’s paying attention to your needs

    It’s the little things, they always say. The little but oh-so-significant things that make up a relationship. And when a marriage is on the rocks and divorce is in the air, these little things are usually neglected, which only makes things worse.

    For Will and Lorraine, it was almost like a return to the early days of marriage. “We’d been hit hard,” Will says, “Our marriage seemed to be getting more and more difficult to sustain by the day. We barely had anything to say to each other, let alone make any loving gestures. We didn’t even say ‘good morning’ or ‘good night’ any longer. We just went about our lives like two strangers who happened to be sharing a home. Divorce seemed imminent, and I didn’t know what to do about it.”

    Related Reading: 15 Subtle Yet Strong Signs Your Marriage Will End In Divorce

    But it seemed Lorraine was changing her mind about letting her marriage go. “She started doing things she’d do when we were first married,” Will says, “She’d make sure my vitamins were laid out on the breakfast table. If I had a big meeting at work, she knew I wouldn’t have time to step out for lunch, so she’d pack leftovers for me. She wasn’t saying much, but her actions were there for me to see.

    I actually dared to hope. “Is my wife having second thoughts about divorce?” As we continued to treat each other with more kindness, we didn’t really address it. Before I could talk about it, she came to me and told me, “I know I filed for divorce, but I changed my mind. Can we give us another try?”.”

    Little things often lead to big decisions, or in this case, a reversal of a big decision. Sharing a marriage and a home is all about the small romantic gestures and thoughtful things we do for our partners. If your wife has started doing these things all over again, there’s a good chance she’s rethinking divorcing you.

    “Small changes in behavior can mean all kinds of things. Maybe they’re being more considerate, or they’re suddenly more adaptable to your routine. It’s also possible they start apologizing more naturally when they think they’ve messed up, rather than withdrawing into silence or blaming their partner,” Sampreeti explains.

    Jealousy and sudden physical intimacy are signs she’s reconsidering divorce

    4. She’s stopped bringing up the “D” word

    We talk a lot about love language but there are a lot of different languages in marriage. There’s fight language and “our marriage is over” language. Articulating that you want to separate from a partner, using words like “split” or “divorce”, are not to be taken lightly. A lot of times, people don’t mention the word simply because they’re afraid of admitting that things have gotten that bad.

    But on the flip side, when your wife stops saying it, when every second sentence she says doesn’t have the word “divorce” in it, there’s a chance that things are getting better. Listening can improve a relationship. Make sure you listen to your wife. If in the past, the smallest thing you did set her off on a rant of, “God, I can’t wait to divorce you!”, then divorce was obviously on her mind.

    But now, if she’s stopped bringing it up, or at least brings it up fewer times, she’s not seeing divorce as the only solution to every problem your marriage has. The signs of second thoughts about divorce don’t all have to be too extravagant, and some can be found in the way your partner communicates with you. This subtle sign is a great way of gauging if you can change your spouse’s mind about divorce.

    We caution against wondering, “Is she bluffing about divorce?”, because she could be seriously considering it instead of making empty threats. But not hurling the word “divorce” at you every chance she gets is a sign she’d rather stay and make things work with you.

    5. She shows signs of jealousy

    A synonym for love is care and to care about your partner is to care about being the only significant other in their lives. When love dies, you no longer care who your partner is spending time with, or wonder about late-night phone calls, or why they’re working late so many nights a week.

    “My wife, Sue, and I were pretty much estranged,” says Sean. “It was the usual – silences, screaming matches, and mostly, an utter lack of care about what the other one was up to. We’d stopped asking each other any questions about our whereabouts for months.” When Sean took on a new project at work, there were several nights he had to stay late. Sue started noticing this.

    “One night, she texted, asking how much later I’d be. The next night, she asked if I’d be home for dinner. Soon, she was staying up till I got home and asking me all about the project and who I was working with. I think I made up some extra women’s names, just to see her reaction,” grins Sean, adding, “Will my wife change her mind about divorce? I’m not too sure about that, but as of right now, it feels pretty good to see she cares again.”

    Related Reading: Can Healthy Jealousy Help You Build Stronger Relationships?

    Jealousy in a relationship in extremes isn’t healthy at all, but let’s face it, we all love knowing our partners hate the thought of us with someone else. It’s a sign we’re wanted, which is really all we want! How to get your wife to change her decision of divorce? Maybe rile her up with a little jealousy.

    6. She wants to spend time together

    Time is both a friend and an enemy where love is concerned. We want more of it and never seem to have quite enough. When you’re fighting and convinced that you want to end your marriage, one of the first things you cut off is time with the other person.

    In fact, if things have gotten really bad, you probably avoid spending time with your partner as much as possible, since being together only means yelling and blame games and other unpleasantries. So, what does it mean when your wife, who for months has been staying as far away from you as possible, suddenly wants to spend time with you?

    This is your wife testing the waters of your fractured marriage, and hopefully realizing that she still can bear to be around you. This is her trying to reach out to you and communicating that she still likes being with you. So, if she’s making sure you eat at least a meal together every day, or she asks if you’d like to go grocery shopping with her, or maybe even get dinner together somewhere, it’s a sign she doesn’t completely hate your guts and is reconsidering divorcing you.

    This could also manifest itself in social interactions, Sampreeti says. “If there were friends and well-wishers who had a role in the divorce plan, take note of whether your wife is pulling away from them. Changing dynamics in social relationships, a revised list of friends and well-wishers, or a different pattern of engagement and social habits could be signs that she’s changing her mind about divorce,” she explains.

    Do wives change their mind about divorce is a tough question to answer, but if she’s giving you her time and asking for yours, we think you’ve got your answer.

    stories about divorce

    7. She remembers your preferences

    A friend had been separated from her husband for a while, but they hadn’t finalized the divorce yet. A few weeks into their separation, I met her for lunch and noticed she’d left her hair open instead of in its usual topknot. When I commented on the new hair, she looked rather sheepish and said her husband liked it that way. She’d just met him to go over some papers, and well…

    Needless to say, that divorce never went through, and she’s still floating around with her hair loose and flowing at the peak of summer! So, evidently, when a wife, even an estranged wife, suddenly starts wearing things she knows you like, or making your favorite dishes, or humming your favorite tunes around you, she’s probably not thinking of the best divorce lawyer in town. A few acts of showing affection can be all you need to spot it.

    In fact, she’s thinking about you, and what you like, and things that make you happy. She’s remembering things that make you smile and bring you joy. Sure, her wearing her hair the way you like doesn’t mean she’s screaming out, “I filed for divorce but changed my mind”, but it’s still a stepping stone.

    We’d say that’s a pretty safe bet and a sure sign that she’s rethinking whatever divorce thoughts she was having. Don’t take it for granted, though. Make sure you return the favor and pay attention to things she likes too!

    Related Reading: Marriage Separation Advice: 11 Wise Tips

    8. She wants your attention

    Don’t we always want attention from our loved ones! Don’t we fight with them, buy new outfits and do so much more to get attention from our significant others? Don’t get us wrong, your wife wanting to divorce you doesn’t mean she’s just trying to get your attention, so don’t take it lightly.

    But, is she suddenly asking your opinion on things that are important to her? Is she commenting on the news or telling you about a new restaurant that’s opened in town and very obviously waiting for you to respond? Is the TV always tuned to a movie channel she knows you hate and will comment on? Well then, she’s trying to catch your eye and your mind and letting you know she wants attention in the relationship.

    If this is happening after a prolonged time of your wife ignoring you and making it clear that you don’t matter to her at all, you can take it as a sign that she’s trying to initiate reconciliation. And she’s making sure you pay attention to what she’s doing. So, if she’s looking for a reaction or just an opening to a conversation, we’d recommend you take it. When you’ve been pondering on questions like, “My wife wants a divorce, how can I change her mind?”, know that attention, the good kind, is an excellent tonic for an ailing relationship.

    9. She’s paying you compliments

    This is kind of an obvious sign. Let’s say for months your wife’s been telling you that she can’t stand your face, the way you breathe and that the sound of your chewing makes her want to stab you. Then, things calm down, and slowly, she starts saying nice things about you.

    “That shirt looks great on you.” “That stew you made for dinner was delicious!” “That’s a great presentation you made – the client will love it!” Yeah, you’ll probably be super suspicious at first, but if it continues, and if she’s being sincere, she’s appreciating you and is changing her mind about divorcing you.

    Appreciation and sincere compliments in a relationship are balms to the most wounded partners. It’s also her way of showing you that while there are lots of things she would like you to change (she’s probably yelled out a list at you by now!), she does in fact realize that you have some wonderful qualities that she’s ready to embrace all over again.

    Divorce may have been very much on her mind, and maybe she’s still on the fence about it but she no longer thinks you’re a complete tool with no redeeming qualities at all. That’s definitely progress. How to get your wife to change her decision of divorce is a complicated question.

    There are marriages that are broken beyond repair and no amount of apologies or olive branches will fix them. There are marriages where one or both partners have cheated, or where abuse has prevailed, or that were maybe just a mistake between two people who were never compatible in the first place.

    But then, every problem has a root cause, and a lot of these problems can be resolved with patience, understanding, and maybe some couple’s therapy. Your wife might have been contemplating divorce for a while without you even noticing, which means you weren’t paying attention to her or to your marriage. Maybe throwing divorce into the ring was her way of giving you an ultimatum, of saying that things need to change and she can’t take it anymore.

    “Note if your wife takes the initiative to take on and share more responsibilities with you. Also, if she suggests seeking professional help or therapy, that could be an expression of hope for reconciliation,” Sampreeti says. If you’re looking for help, Bonobology’s panel of experienced counselors can help you get your marriage back to its former glory.

    Whatever it is, it’s a boon when an unhappy partner decides to reconsider divorce and give the marriage another chance. Recognize this, read the signs, and ensure you do your bit to repair your relationship as well. Marriage is a two-way street, bringing it back from the verge of divorce needs all your strength as well.

    What Is Sleep Divorce And How Can It Save A Marriage

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  • Why Do Men Look At Other Women – 23 Real And Honest Reasons

    Why Do Men Look At Other Women – 23 Real And Honest Reasons

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    Your man might be head over heels in love with you and yet you will occasionally catch him staring at a woman who looks like she has walked right off the set of a fashion show. We often wonder, why do men look at other women? We are far too progressive to write it off as their nature. However, we understand that it can be annoying when your man has a wandering eye. In this article, we present 23 real and honest reasons men check out other women. And trust us, it has nothing to do with you!

    Why Do Men Look At Other Women? 23 Real Reasons

    Let’s admit it. Despite the villainization, men are not testosterone-driven beings with a stone for a heart. They are human with human needs. Hence, when an attractive person walks by, they will most likely glance. There is no compulsion or law which forbids you from looking at other people when you are in a relationship.

    It is normal. It is also normal to not be happy when you see your man eyeing or looking at younger women. So let’s put millions of women out of their misery by finally revealing the real reasons men look at other women. Oh, and did we mention that there are 23 of them?

    1. She is ravishing in red

    Research suggests that men are drawn to women (like bees to honey) who wear red. The color serves as an aphrodisiac in color psychology and is rooted in the biological needs of men. Since it is primarily known as the color of attraction, a woman walking by in a hot red dress will definitely become the subject of a man’s attention, even when he is with his partner. 

    2. The woman is extremely attractive 

    It is easy to complain that “my boyfriend looks at other females in front of me”, but can you honestly deny looking at an extremely handsome man when you went to the mall with your beloved partner? While smarter men will be discreet about it, some men linger their eyes a bit longer. Just like you would if Chris Evans happened to run into you while you cross the street (okay, we are getting off-topic here). So why do men look at other women? Because she is attractive. Simple.

    Relatable Reading: 17 Signs There Is Someone Else In Your Partner’s Life

    3. He is curious about her 

    Humans are curious creatures. We frequently imagine hypothetical situations and speculate on how our lives may be lived in an alternative existence. It doesn’t necessarily imply that he yearns for this woman. He might simply be fulfilling the curiosity in his mind. 

    4. The other woman is causing a scene 

    Sometimes, when you think that your boyfriend is checking out other women, he might not be checking them out. Maybe he is just looking at the ruckus she is causing. Anybody making a scene will draw a guy’s attention, especially a lady. Naturally, he will look if there is a fight going on or if she is being loud and everyone is looking at her. 

    5. She stands out from the crowd 

    Don’t we all stop and stare at someone who looks different from the herd of people around us? So do men. It doesn’t always mean that the other woman is attractive. Maybe your man’s wandering eye has landed on a woman who seems to stand out from the crowd. It could simply be an absurd haircut or a giant tattoo.

    6. He is lost in his own world

    What draws guys to other women? A straight man’s natural inclination is to observe other ladies. So your man’s eyes might have initially caught the glimpse of another woman, but then, he zoned out. His eyes are still on her, but his mind is elsewhere. Before you write it off as a red flag in a relationship, snap him back to attention. He’s still your guy, albeit a little lost.

    7. He is looking elsewhere

    As mentioned in the previous point, sometimes a wandering eye is less about the eye and more about the mind. Don’t jump to the conclusion that your man is staring at an unfamiliar woman. He might simply be focusing on the same area as the woman. He could be looking at something else entirely. Be sure of where his eyes are before you get upset.

    8. Something is wrong in your relationship 

    All fun and jokes apart, catching your man looking at other women all the time is a matter of concern. While some men can’t stop it, others purposefully check out women when their relationship is precariously close to ending, and this is their way of bringing your attention to it. So if you constantly find yourself telling people that “my boyfriend looks at other women in front of me”, you need to address the problems in your relationship.

    9. Maybe he is unhappy with you 

    Why do men browse the websites/pages of other women? He might, after all, be unhappy with you. His actions, such as watching videos or browsing online for photographs of women, are a sign that he is unhappy in the relationship. In such a scenario, have an honest conversation with your partner, find out what needs of his are unmet, and see if you can fulfill them. 

    10. You are looking at the other woman 

    Why do men look at other women? Because you are looking at her! It’s not that you are not allowed to admire other women just because you’re straight. The only distinction is that since you share the same gender, your gaze isn’t perceived as a concern by your partner. Perhaps he was merely imitating your gaze before getting carried away.

    Related Reading: 10 Thoughts In A Woman’s Mind When Her Man Is Checking Out A Girl

    11. He has nothing else to do 

    Yes, it sounds problematic. Yes, it reiterates the male gaze. But sometimes, that’s just it. He is bored. Staring at other people could be a way for a man to have fun while out by himself and relaxing at a bar or club. There is nothing else for him to do at that moment, so your man is just staring.

    Once, I went for a casual dinner with an old friend. While returning from the bathroom, I realized he was staring at a woman who had just entered the restaurant. I teased him about it and he shrugged his shoulders and said, “What, you were in the loo, what was I supposed to do?” And true to his words, he didn’t glance in her direction again once we went back to chatting. 

    12. He wants to get your attention

    What draws guys to other women? This will sound childish but some men will direct your attention to them by looking at other ladies. Your partner might decide to turn his attention to the women nearby if you appear disengaged during a chat. He will ignore you for someone else just to catch your attention. This will make you focus on him because no woman enjoys being ignored.

    If the conversation is not interesting, your man’s attention might drift somewhere else, perhaps another woman

    13. He is admiring something else 

    Your man may be admiring something else about the woman. For instance, if your boyfriend sees a superstar online, he might comment that he would like to see that celebrity’s hairdo on you. 

    He might even decide to purchase a dress for you after expressing admiration for the way another woman wore it. Before you think you need to find a way to handle your man looking at other women, make sure that he was not admiring a piece of jewelry or a bag that he thinks you would like. 

    14. He needs stimulation 

    Sometimes, the honest answer to ‘why do men look at other women’ is that they are in a situation that is not emotionally, romantically, or intellectually stimulating. For instance, you might find the man you are meeting for a first date eyeing the waitress because he is not interested in what you are saying or he is simply bored of the topic. 

    15. You are indulging his behavior 

    If you frequently find that your boyfriend is checking out another woman and say nothing, he is going to assume you are okay with it. If you do not make him aware of your displeasure and just laugh or shrug it off, he will assume that this is acceptable behavior in a relationship. 

    Jenna, 32, recently got out of a relationship of 5 years. She said “I used to feel like a cool girlfriend when I let him look at other women. In fact, I would just let it go when he asked me if I was uncomfortable. I wasn’t comfortable and I never communicated that to him. It became frustrating for me and by then, it was too late to say anything.” 

    16. She is a younger woman 

    According to a study, men are inclined toward women who appear younger. So if your 50-year-old husband is staring at the young waitress, that’s probably why. A lot of men like looking at younger women because they are more energetic and fun. Most of the time, it means nothing more than staring, but if your husband is insisting on going back to the same restaurant, you need to raise more than an eyebrow. 

    17. The woman resembles someone

    Maybe the woman who just walked into the grocery store resembles a childhood friend or a celebrity that your man has a crush on. When we come across someone who bears an uncanny resemblance to another person in our life, we all tend to stare. 

    Related Reading: 21 Signs Of Lack Of Respect In A Relationship

    18. Why do men look at other women? They do not respect you 

    In some cases, the real reason for them indulging in this behavior, especially in front of their spouse or partner, is that they have no respect for the person they’re with, and don’t care about the impact of their actions. They feel it is alright to stare at another woman who is presumably more attractive.

    19. He wants to make you jealous 

    A man can purposefully stare at another woman and let you know he is doing it just to make you jealous. Maybe things have been rocky in your relationship or maybe he caught you staring at another guy and is simply doing it to let you know how it feels. This sort of jealousy in a relationship can be resolved by communicating with your partner.

    20. He is sexist and often objectifies women

    The male gaze has been a source of discomfort for women all over the globe. If your man is ogling another woman, he could be objectifying her. It is sexist behavior that should not be encouraged, especially if you catch him doing it. Let him know that it is wrong and makes you uncomfortable.

    21. The woman is seducing your man 

    The other lady might have made it her goal to seduce your man, even if he is going about his business. She might pass your man a message or wink at him, for example. Any man will turn to gaze at such actions. His wandering eye will not be able to resist such actions from the other woman and he will end up looking at her. 

    22. He likes the woman he is staring at 

    When a wife says that “I get jealous when my man looks at other women”, she probably has a good reason to get jealous. There is a high chance that the real reason he’s looking at another woman is that he likes her romantically/intellectually/sexually. Whether he acts on these feelings or not is secondary. 

    23. It is his nature

    I wanted to save this for the last because this while being true, can be a subjective matter. Biologically, however, a portion of a man’s brain responds when he sees an attractive lady. As per a study, men are more prone to succumbing to their sexual desires than women. They don’t have as much resistance, hence, when an attractive or physically appealing woman comes across a man, he tends to stare at her. 

    5 Tips To Get Him To Stop Looking At Other Women

    Most women find themselves complaining that “I get jealous when my husband looks at another girl” but have no idea what to do about it. Now that you know the real reasons men check out other women, let’s talk about dealing with a man’s wandering eye when the occasional staring starts developing into a habit.

    While it is natural to look at other human beings, it is also normal for you to be uncomfortable with this. Here are 5 tips to make him stop looking at other women: 

    why do men look at other women

    1. Voice your concern 

    How can you make him stop looking at other women when he is not even aware that you don’t appreciate this behavior? If you ignore it, he will assume that you don’t care and he can continue.

    Instead, effectively communicate it with him and find out why he keeps looking at other women. He may use phrases like “Oh! That dress is gorgeous!” as an excuse. Knowing you want to understand will compel him to eventually tell you his reasons and also be aware of your discomfort. 

    2. Let him know that he can control it 

    Here’s how to handle your man looking at another woman. By helping him. Make him realize that he has a habit of staring at other women and give him the confidence to control it by being supportive. He may not be aware of his problematic gaze, and a little guidance could be just what he needs.

    Related Reading: 9 Signs Of Low Self-Esteem In A Woman You Are Dating

    3. Don’t make a big deal 

    If you see that your boyfriend is checking out another girl or that your husband is looking at a younger woman, do not make a scene. Yes, it annoys you when your partner blatantly turns to look at another lady while you’re around. But it’s best to exercise self-control.

    Try being playful instead. Say, “caught you!” to gently draw his attention to it. You might also suggest to him that you can call her on his behalf. And you’ll both probably chuckle about it. He might just stop doing this eventually if you don’t make a big deal out of it.

    4. Point out an attractive woman to your partner

    I know it seems like the opposite of what you want, but when you point out an attractive woman to your partner, it shows that you are not an insecure woman and aren’t bothered by some meaningless staring. This will make your partner see you as the confident woman that you are, which will automatically increase your appeal, taking away his attention from the other woman. 

    5. Work on improving your self-esteem 

    Self-esteem is the belief in one’s value. If your man’s glances at other women have a big impact on you, you should introspect on your own worth instead. Think about how special and deserving you are. You know that there will always be more attractive women than you. Accept that, so his wandering eyes don’t bother you.

    Sarah, 27, shares her personal experience. She says, “I get jealous when my husband looks at another girl. I once told him this. To my surprise, he sat me down and told me how wonderful and beautiful I am to him and that looking at other women means nothing to him. That’s when I realized it was a ‘me’ problem. I’m working on being more confident about myself.” 

    This brings us to the end of the ‘why do men look at other women’ question, and how to handle your man looking at them. Honest and open communication can better any relationship. Hence, if you are bothered by it, let him know. Or have fun, and don’t read too much into it. 

    FAQs

    1. Is it normal for a man to look at other women when in a relationship?

    Yes. It is completely normal for a man to look at other women as long as he does not act on it. Women also look at other men while being committed because there is no law that forbids them from appreciating beauty. 

    2. How to react when I catch my man looking at other women?

    If you are bothered by it, be honest. Sometimes, it is best to ignore it because it does not mean anything. But if it is impacting you, talk to your partner calmly and let them know how you feel. 

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  • 10 Best Movies About Women’s Power You Need to See – Morning Lazziness

    10 Best Movies About Women’s Power You Need to See – Morning Lazziness

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    Women have faced oppression, inequality, and injustice for centuries. But that hasn’t stopped them from pushing boundaries and standing up for what they believe in. Inspirational movies for women can do more than entertain us – they can also motivate us to take a stand and make our voices heard, whether it’s a coming-of-age story or an exploration of the female experience. 

    When it comes to movies about women’s power, there are plenty out there that can be inspiring and empowering for any female viewer. From tales of solid female characters breaking barriers to those showcasing the strength of sisterhood, these films provide comfort and inspiration while exploring various issues associated with womanhood.

    Best Female Empowerment Movies

    These ten best movies about women’s power are the most influential films you can watch:

    1. Hidden Figures

    Hidden Figure is a powerful female empowerment movie. It follows the incredible story of three African-American female mathematicians at NASA who made history by playing an integral role in one of the most critical moments in United States history. 

    The movie beautifully tackles themes of racism, sexism, self-empowerment, and resilience, making it one of the best women’s movies out there. It is an excellent source of inspiration for women everywhere and encourages us to always pursue our dreams, even in the face of adversity.

    2. Real Women Have Curves

    Real Women Have Curves

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    This movie follows the story of Ana, a young Mexican-American woman stuck between two worlds: her family’s traditional values and the American dream of more extensive opportunities. With its strong female characters and empowering message, Real Women Have Curves offers a unique and layered narrative that will leave an impression on viewers.

    If some of these movies are blocked in your country, and you’re looking to access unblocked Netflix movies and shows, VeePN is a great option. VeePN is a VPN that allows users to securely browse the Internet without their activity being tracked or monitored. This VPN for Netflix provides a secure, encrypted connection to the Internet, allowing users to access blocked content without compromising their security or privacy. It also offers additional features such as unlimited bandwidth and fast speeds, which are essential for streaming content from Netflix. 

    3. Mulan

    Mulan

    Mulan is a fantastic movie that follows the story of a young Chinese woman, Mulan, who dresses up as a man to take her father’s place in the Imperial Army and fight against the Hun invasion. It also celebrates resilience and courage while teaching important lessons about family and honour. The iconic character Mulan has become an icon of female empowerment and is often cited as one of the best women’s movies.

    4. Legally Blonde

    Legally Blonde

    Legally Blonde tells the story of Elle Woods, a stylish and smart woman who defies stereotypes to prove her worth in law school. The movie has been praised for its inspirational themes of female empowerment, showing that women can accomplish anything they set their minds to. Not only is Legally Blonde an inspirational movie for women, but it’s also full of humour and heart. Elle Woods confronts her challenges with grace, wit, and charm.

    5. Bombshell

    Bombshell

    This 2019 release stars Charlize Theron, Nicole Kidman, and Margot Robbie in a drama based on the true story of sexual harassment at Fox News. It’s an eye-opening look at how women can be treated in the workplace and how they can band together to make a change. 

    6. Erin Brockovich

    Erin Brockovich

    Erin Brockovich is one of the best inspirational movies for women and a great example of female empowerment. It stars Julia Roberts as Erin, a single mother struggling to make ends meet until she finds an unlikely way to fight injustice in her community.

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    The movie follows Erin’s journey from being an unemployed paralegal to becoming an environmental activist and fighting a major legal battle. Through her hard work and determination, Erin successfully takes on a large corporation responsible for polluting the water in her town and wins a multi-million dollar settlement for affected residents.

    Also Read: 60+ International Women’s Day Quotes For Women Empowerment

    7. Wonder Woman

    Wonder Woman

    This movie follows Diana, an Amazonian princess who leaves her home to help fight in World War I. Throughout the movie, Diana discovers her true identity and women’s power and uses her strength to protect those around her. This movie has become an iconic symbol of female empowerment due to its inspiring story and strong female lead character.

    8. Lady Bird

    Lady Bird

    Lady Bird is one of the best women’s movies in recent years, and it has become a widely popular choice among female viewers. This Academy Award-winning movie focuses on the story of Christine McPherson, or “Lady Bird” as she calls herself, and her journey through high school and into adulthood. This story highlights the importance of female empowerment, friendship, and family.

    9. Bend It Like Beckham

    Bend It Like Beckham

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    The movie follows Jess, an 18-year-old girl who dreams of becoming a professional soccer player despite her traditional Indian family’s objections. With the help of her best friend, Jules, she ultimately achieves her goal while also learning to honour her family’s wishes better.

    Also Read: 60 Frida Kahlo Quotes On Feminism, Love and Inspiration

    10. Frida

    Frida

    Frida is an inspirational movie for women that highlights female empowerment. Directed by Julie Taymor, it stars Salma Hayek as the title character and tells the story of the life and times of one of Mexico’s most iconic artists, Frida Kahlo. 

    The movie focuses on her struggles to overcome physical pain and personal challenges to become one of the most renowned female painters in history. In addition to being a beautiful film with stunning visuals, Frida is also an inspiring tale of resilience and determination all women can relate to.

    These female empowerment movies are a great reminder of the power and strength of women and the importance of standing up for yourself despite any obstacles that come your way.

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    Shruti Sood

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  • 5 Strategies to Easily Protect Your Family Estate in Old Age – Morning Lazziness

    5 Strategies to Easily Protect Your Family Estate in Old Age – Morning Lazziness

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    So, you’ve achieved substantial wealth after working many years to build your assets, and as a hard-working person who has just retired, you may think the journey has now finished. But when it comes to passing on your assets and estate, you should be mindful of a couple of critical methods. Estate protection is the next part of your journey. So, which methods are important, and why should you protect your assets? We’ve covered the crucial information you need in this article, including why free last will and testament documents are important.

    Why Protect Your Family Estate in Older Age?

    The main reason you must protect your assets in older age is to protect your family’s future. Your inheritors are the ones who will receive the family estate you have worked so hard to build, and there are some circumstances in which your estate may be listed in a will that must go through a complex probate process. This is why protecting your family estate in a will is important.

    Alternatively, if you don’t include your estate in a will or draft a will, you will pass away ‘intestate,’ which can lead to further complications when passing on your estate.

    What is probate?

    The term probate refers to a process in which a will must be validated or proven in a court of law. The process involves administering a deceased person’s estate and organizing their assets and possessions. 

    What does ‘intestate’ mean?

    Passing away ‘intestate’ means dying without a will. If you pass away ‘intestate,’ this means there’s a chance you won’t be able to hand your estate and assets down to the people you had in mind. The law will determine who should handle your estate in situations like these. To avoid these outcomes, you have five methods to protect your family estate in old age.

    5 Methods to Effortlessly Protect Your Family Estate

    Grandparents Quotes

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    So, which five methods should you consider to effortlessly protect your family estate? Here are the most important ones to think about. 

    1. Writing a will

    Ensuring you have written a will that stipulates who you want to pass your estate to is the best way to protect your estate. You can begin writing this legal document anytime and then ensure you get it notarized.

    When you have written a will, keep one copy with you, safely stored, and one copy with the notary after ensuring it meets the required conditions. It’s also crucial to make frequent amendments to the will and review it regularly.

    2. Avoiding federal estate tax with gifts

    Unfortunately, in many situations, the value of your estate can be lower than expected due to federal estate taxes. Now, federal estate tax comes into effect if your estate value is more than $12.060 million, or $24.12 million if you’re a couple, but there is a way to avoid federal estate tax – giving gifts to your family.

    Remember, you can give unlimited gifts to family members if you want to avoid federal estate tax. Make sure you continue giving gifts until your estate value is under the threshold of $12.06 million.

    Also Read: 4 Tips to Getting Into the Real Estate Market

    3. Making donations to charity

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    Looking for an additional method to get the federal estate tax break? One approach you may consider is making donations to charity. Ensure you create a charitable lead trust, which will mean you can transfer assets continuously to your charity, and the assets that remain when you pass away will go to your beneficiaries.

    You may also find that you can mitigate capital gains tax by transferring appreciating assets to irrevocable trusts. As you gain funds from the asset, the investment will go to the irrevocable trust. This will help you avoid capital gains tax.

    4. Making a wise investment

    When it comes to protecting your family estate, there’s another method you may consider – making wise investments is a good option. It’s one of the best alternatives to storing your money in a savings account.

    Make sure you work with an expert investor to ensure you’ve made the best investment and that your funds will keep increasing in value. This method will mean your beneficiaries can withdraw the funds intermittently or work with your expert investment advisor to maintain the investment arrangement.

    5. Choosing a life insurance policy

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    Your next option for protecting your family estate in older age involves choosing a life insurance policy. One crucial advantage of this method is that a life insurance policy will help your loved ones pay for funeral costs. 

    How can you establish a life insurance policy and split your life insurance amount from your other assets? You must first select a trustee and then name the trust beneficiaries. Finally, you can establish how much each beneficiary will receive.

    Also Read: Tips for Buying a House for the First Time: Step by Step Guide

    Effortlessly Protect Your Family Estate In Older Age

    Although your journey to create a family estate is over, protecting it in your later years is still vital. The critical points you shouldn’t forget when protecting your family estate in older age are these. It’s important to ensure you have a will and continuously review it in older age to avoid any complex probate or intestate issues. Then, you can implement the other methods listed in this article to reduce tax burdens for your beneficiaries or avoid tax burdens by making investments. 

    Effortlessly protect your family estate in older age to make the transition easier for your inheritors and beneficiaries with our top five methods.

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    Shruti Sood

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  • Foreplay: More Than Just a Warm-Up 

    Foreplay: More Than Just a Warm-Up 

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    When it comes to sex, it’s easy to focus on the main event. But have you ever stopped to think about the importance of foreplay? In my experience as a relationship and intimacy coach, I have seen so many couples experience unhappy sex lives and love lives because the foreplay wasn’t satisfying. They often come to me feeling frustrated and disconnected from each other. Without satisfying foreplay, the sexual experience becomes mechanical and unfulfilling. It is crucial for couples to make the time and effort for foreplay, as it is the key to mind-blowing sex.

    The good news is that with the right approach and guidance, it is possible to bring the spark back and take your sexual experiences to a whole new level. Don’t let a lack of satisfying foreplay ruin your relationship! So, what is foreplay? As Dr. Laura Berman, a well-known sex therapist and relationship expert, puts it, “Foreplay is the secret ingredient to a truly satisfying sexual experience.” And isn’t the journey more satisfying than the destination? Foreplay is the journey, and it’s a journey worth taking.

    Physical And Emotional Benefits Of Foreplay

    Sexual foreplay isn’t just about building anticipation and excitement, it also has some serious benefits for your body and mind:

    • It can increase blood flow to the genitals, making it easier for women to become lubricated and for men to achieve an erection
    • It can release feel-good endorphins which improve overall mood. It also reduces the level of the stress hormone Cortisol in the body
    • Foreplay helps release Oxytocin, which is known as the love hormone. This strengthens the bond of trust in relationships and intimacy between partners

    For more expert-backed insights, please subscribe to our YouTube channel.

    How To Incorporate Foreplay Into Your Relationship

    Even though you may want the spice and excitement foreplay can bring into your sex life, sometimes it can be hard to know how to incorporate it into your daily routine. Here are a few foreplay tips to help you get started:

    1. Make time for it

    Finding time for foreplay can be challenging, especially with busy work and personal schedules. But there are ways to make time for sensual foreplay, even with a busy schedule:

    • Schedule it: Just like you would schedule a meeting or workout, schedule sex and make time for foreplay. Make it a regular part of your routine and treat it as an important commitment. This is the simplest of the foreplay ideas to help you get started
    • Be creative: Instead of only being intimate at night, try being intimate in the morning or during lunch breaks. This can add a sense of spontaneity and excitement to your sexual encounters
    • Build sexual tension: Be sexual with your partner throughout the day by flirting, teasing, and romancing. This will build up the sexual tension before things even get to the bedroom
    • Don’t treat it as a chore: Remember that making time for foreplay doesn’t have to be a chore, it can be a fun and exciting way to add some variety to your relationship. And it’s worth making the effort for!

    Related Reading: The Dynamics And Importance Of Sex In A Relationship

    2. Setting the stage

    Foreplay is not just about physical touch but also about creating a sensory experience. Foreplay is best enjoyed by engaging all five senses. Music, candles, aroma, dance, and body massage can be wonderful ways to experience sensual foreplay that truly helps you connect with your partner. Here are some foreplay ideas you can explore:

    • Visual: Things like lighting candles or setting the mood with soft lighting
    • Sound: Use music or natural sounds to enhance the mood
      Music: Music can set the mood and create an ambiance that can help couples relax and get into the moment. Slow, sensual music can be a great way to set the stage for a romantic and intimate experience
      Nature: The sounds of nature – rainfall against your window glass, waves on a beach, or the music of a forest – can also be very comforting and relaxing. Just make sure you find a place that is private and safe
    • Smell: Candles can add to the ambiance, creating a warm and cozy atmosphere. Aromatherapy can also be used to enhance the mood. You can work with essential oils such as lavender, vanilla, and jasmine that are particularly effective in creating a sensual and relaxing atmosphere
    • Touch: Physical touch plays a crucial role in improving intimacy in a relationship. You can try: Dance: Dancing brings your bodies close and you touch each other in a non-sexual way, which can be incredibly intimate. low, sensual dancing is a great way for a couple to connect outside the bedroom; Massage: Massaging each other’s bodies can be incredibly sensual and is a great way to get relaxed
    • Taste: Taste can be incorporated through sensual kissing or the use of flavored lubricants

    This creates an ambiance that can help both partners relax and get into the mood for intimacy, as well as builds anticipation and excitement. Engaging all five senses, including sight, touch, smell, taste, and sound can make the sexual experience more satisfying for both partners.

    However, our emotional blocks and past traumas can hinder us from fully opening ourselves to the joys of sensuality. Once I had a female client who, due to body image issues, would not allow her partner to explore her body during intimacy. She was self-conscious about her appearance and felt that her partner would not find her attractive. Through our work together, she learned to love and accept her body, and as a result, was able to fully enjoy the intimate act with her partner.

    Another client, a couple, would only engage in intimacy in complete darkness. They never saw each other during the act. This was due to past trauma that made them self-conscious about their bodies. We worked on building trust and self-love, and they eventually were able to let go of their insecurities and engage in intimacy in the light. It was a beautiful transformation to witness and a testament to the fact that intimacy coaching and self-love can help overcome these issues.

    Related Reading: 11 Signs Of Low Self-Esteem Behaviors In A Relationship

    3. Communicate your needs and desires during foreplay

    Sexual foreplay is all about connecting with each other, being in the moment, and enjoying it. The only way you can do that is by communicating with your partner and letting them know what pleases and comforts you the most. Don’t expect your partner to read your mind!

    However, talking about your desires, boundaries, sexual fantasies, and what turns you on can be intimidating. That’s why experts like Dr. Emily Morse stress the importance of open and honest communication, not just during foreplay, but throughout your relationship.
    And remember, communication is a two-way street. Make sure to listen to your partner’s needs and desires too. And don’t be afraid to revisit the conversation as you both grow and evolve!

    4. Common Mistakes to Avoid in Foreplay

    Foreplay should be a blast for both partners but sometimes we make mistakes that can take away from the fun. That’s why one of the most important foreplay tips I have for you today is to steer clear of the following mistakes:

    Rushing through it

    As a relationship and intimacy coach, I have seen firsthand the importance of not rushing through foreplay and taking the time to build anticipation and excitement. Dr. Ian Kerner, a sex therapist and author, also suggests the same. Unfortunately, I have found that many couples are dissatisfied with their sex lives because the foreplay is either rushed or skipped. People are more focused on orgasm or dealing with performance pressure and don’t take the time to explore each other, arouse each other or even express their needs. I always tell my clients instead of focusing on the end goal, savor the journey

    Not paying attention to your partner’s pleasure

    Another mistake I often see couples make is neglecting their partner’s pleasure during foreplay. Dr. Kerner emphasizes the importance of making sure both partners are satisfied, not just one. I couldn’t agree more, after all, what is foreplay if not a way of creating intimacy and connection? It’s crucial to make sure both partners are on the same page for a satisfying sexual experience.

    That’s why I always encourage my clients to communicate better with their partners, express their needs and desires and make sure to give and receive pleasure during foreplay.

    What men need to know

    When it comes to foreplay, both men and women must understand that their bodies react differently to sexual stimulation. Men typically find that their genitals are the most sensitive and responsive to touch, while women’s entire bodies can be a source of pleasure. This means that women may require more than just vaginal or clitoral stimulation to fully enjoy and get into the mood for intimacy. It’s vital to understand what turns women on.

    Once I had a client, a man who didn’t know how to please his wife. He would just grab her from behind without focus or time for foreplay. I taught him to slow down, create an atmosphere through music, and understand the importance of exploring a woman’s entire body during foreplay. Now they enjoy a fulfilling sexual experience together.

    Men can take the lead enthusiastically in exploring a woman’s body with techniques such as bites, licks, kisses, and using the fingertips and tongue. This can include areas such as the neck, ears, and inner thighs, which are often overlooked but can be incredibly sensitive and pleasurable for women.

    Related Reading: Sexual Performance Anxiety: When Self-Doubt Plays Havoc On Your Intimate Moments

    What women need to know

    Likewise, it’s important for women to understand what is intimacy to a man. I once had a young couple as clients where the woman would always wear shorts, t-shirts, and pajamas. I suggested that we do some online shopping for her, with the help of her husband. The husband chose lingerie that he found attractive and bought it for her as a gift. This was also a great opportunity for her to learn what would arouse him. She began to dress up more for her partner and it helped to improve their sexual intimacy.

    I always remind my clients that men are visually stimulated and it’s important for women to present themselves in a visually appealing manner. This could include dressing up in a way that is attractive to the partner, being sensual, and smelling good. It’s a small step that can greatly improve the sexual relationship.

    Bottomline is, both men and women need to understand and appreciate each other’s bodies and turn-ons. This can lead to a more satisfying and enjoyable sexual experience for both parties.

    5. Roleplays and fantasies in sexual foreplay

    Roleplaying and enacting our fantasies can add a new level of excitement to foreplay by allowing us to explore different sides of ourselves and our partners. For example, one couple I worked with roleplayed as a doctor and patient, which helped them explore their desires in a safe and consensual way. It brought a new level of intimacy and connection to their sexual experiences and helped them overcome sexual blocks.

    Enacting our fantasies can be liberating and make us feel more confident and freer. For example, one client was able to explore her kink for BDSM through roleplaying with her partner, which helped her feel more comfortable discussing it in real life.

    Additionally, it can create a deeper emotional connection with our partner, as another couple I worked with discovered by acting out their fantasy of being stranded on a deserted island. It’s a great way to explore different sides of ourselves and our partners, push our boundaries, and try new things.

    Related Reading: Sexless Marriage – Is There Any Hope?

    6. Bring in the “surprise” element

    The element of surprise can add a new level of excitement to foreplay. It can come in many forms, from unexpected touches to new sex positions or toys. This unpredictability can increase anticipation and lead to stronger orgasms and deeper emotional connections between partners.

    To break out of a routine and add spontaneity, try initiating foreplay in a different room or even outside the house. Introduce a new toy or prop to add a new layer of excitement and pleasure. Role-playing, costumes, or outfits can be a fun way to explore different fantasies and desires.

    The element of surprise can also be used to explore different types of touch, such as light feather touch or intense sensation play. Remember to be open-minded and communicative, and have fun experimenting with new ideas to enhance your intimate life.

    It takes two to (fore)play

    When it comes to foreplay, both partners need to understand that they share the responsibility of ensuring it’s great. It should not become the duty or burden of only one partner. Women should not hesitate in taking the lead in the bedroom. A woman’s ability to initiate and take charge can help create a deeper emotional connection and intimacy leading to a more satisfying and enjoyable sexual experience. So do not hold back from actively participating!

    Key Pointers

    • Foreplay is the key to fulfilling sex life
    • Instead of just focusing on the endgame of a sexual experience aka orgasm, enjoy the journey and find newer ways to connect with your partner
    • Communicate, discuss fantasies, experiment with roleplay and sex toys to push the boundaries of your sexual experience
    • Remember to always seek and give consent, voice what you want and what you’re not comfortable with, respect your partner’s boundaries

    In conclusion, I can’t emphasize enough the importance of foreplay for having a fulfilling sex life. Experiment with different techniques, communicate your needs and desires and avoid these common mistakes. If you’re struggling, don’t hesitate to reach out to me for couples’ sexual intimacy bonding. As a sex coach, I help my clients to undo past patterns, blocks, and behaviors, which restrict them from experiencing sexual fulfillment. Feel free to connect with me for a free first exploratory call. I can help you learn how to have the mind-blowing sex you deserve.

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