Category: Dating & Love

They say never go to bed mad. So, my partner and I stay up in bed and argue. Sometimes vociferously. Sometimes calmly. It depends on how late in the night it is and how hangry we are. Arguments in relationships don’t necessarily indicate you’re in troubled waters. It simply means two people are preventing a bigger fight from happening by solving the smaller ones.

My partner once taunted me after an argument and said that I would rather lose my sleep than lose a fight. But it’s good to argue and let it all out because when you stop arguing in a relationship, it means that you have stopped caring. Joseph Grenny, the co-author of the New York Times bestseller Crucial Conversations, writes that couples who argue together, stay together. The problem begins when you start avoiding those arguments.  

We’re here to help you understand why arguments are important in a relationship, in consultation with counselor Nishmin Marshall, who specializes in offering counseling for loveless marriages, abusive marriages, boredom, fights, and sexual problems. She says, “Arguing is just another vexed version of putting your point across. When couples fight, it brings clarity. It helps them understand each other’s perspective.”

Types Of Argument Styles

Do couples fight? Yes. More often than you might think. Little arguments in relationships are perfectly normal. However, there are different ways in which people argue and no two people argue in the same manner. This is based on their attachment style, emotional intelligence, and their fight-flight-or-freeze response. There are 4 different types of argument styles:

1. Attacking style

Motivated by frustration, vexation, and anger, this argument style is all about pointing out all the wrongs the other partner has done. This argument takes place when one partner doesn’t know how to control anger in a relationship. The argument can turn aggressive and this is all about blaming one person. Some of the examples are: 

• “You always leave the wet towel on the bed”
• “You don’t help out in the kitchen”
• “You never take the thrash out”

2. Defensive style

This type of argument in a relationship happens when the person being blamed for something acts like a victim. Or they may start defending themselves by pointing out the shortcomings and flaws in the other person. For example: 

• “I would have taken the thrash out had you done the dishes tonight”
• “You are always so mean to me”
• “Can you not blame me for once?”

3. Withdrawal style 

You are either the withdrawer or the one trying to push the argument to make your point. If you are the former, then you’re likely to look for ways to avoid arguing. It shows you have a conflict-avoidant personality and you will try to maintain peace. If you are the latter, then you are hellbent on putting your point across. 

Related Reading: 11 Signs Of Low Self-Esteem Behaviors In A Relationship

4. Open style

How to have a healthy argument with your spouse? Try having an open-style argument. This is one of the most healthy ways of arguing with a partner. You are open and considerate of the entire situation. You are not fixated on your perspective or trying to prove the other person wrong. 

Types And Reasons For Arguments In A Relationship 

Nishmin says, “Couple fights are not unhealthy. When you speak out about what’s wrong, your significant other may start respecting you even more for voicing your concerns. When you hold the grudge inside you and make the other partner think that whatever they do doesn’t get to you, they will start taking you for granted.”

That being said, not all fights and arguments in a relationship are created equal. Some are more toxic than others. To help you differentiate between healthy from the unhealthy, let’s take a look at the types, reasons, and causes of relationship arguments:

1. Fighting over finances

Couples arguing about money is nothing new. If you two live together and have decided to manage your finances together, then such fights are inevitable. If both partners are willing to solve this issue and plan a budget list without making one another feel bad about being reckless spenders, then you are on the right track. 

2. Fighting about the same thing repeatedly

If you keep fighting about the same thing again and again, chances are you aren’t even trying to understand the other person’s perspective. You both are adamant that one of you is right and the other one is wrong. Such repeated fights in a relationship can turn chronic if it’s not addressed properly. If you’ve found yourself wondering, how much arguing is normal in a relationship, chances are you’re clashing a little too often, perhaps because your issues have already turned chronic. 

3. Arguing over chores

Why do married couples fight? Household chores are definitely a burning topic between couples that paves the way for arguments and bickering very often. Because when there is an imbalance in the division of labor at home, it can lead to many fights and ugly confrontations. It’s because one partner is too lazy to do their share of work. 

According to research conducted on the connection between household work and sexual satisfaction, it was found that when male partners reported making a fair contribution to housework, the couple experienced more frequent sexual encounters. 

4. Arguments related to family

This is one of the common couple fights. The arguments could be about anything – your partner disliking your family or you feeling like your partner doesn’t prioritize you as much as they prioritize their family. Family connections run deep. Hence these arguments can’t be avoided. You have to talk to each other and find a way to work through it.

5. Arguments triggered by trust issues

Constant fighting in a relationship due to suspicion can genuinely damage the foundation of your love. If suspicion, lack of trust, or betrayal has seeped through the relationship, you may end up arguing all the time. It can become difficult to go back to the way things were in your relationship. Trust, once broken, is very difficult to rebuild. You need to learn the tips to build trust in a relationship. Always know that with dedication, honesty, and love, nothing is impossible. 

6. Couple fight over lifestyle choices 

If one loves to party and the other one is a homebody, then these fights are bound to happen. The introverted partner who doesn’t like to go out much may feel pressured or see themselves as boring. This will make them feel bad about themselves. The extroverted partner, on the other hand, may feel stifled. You both have to compromise and find a middle ground. 

Fighting In Relationships — How Much Is Too Much?

To know how much is too much fighting in a relationship, we reached out to Ridhi Golechha, (M.A. Psychology), who specializes in counseling for loveless marriages, breakups, and other relationship issues. She says, “If you don’t tell your partner that one of their actions is bothering you, they will never know. Your partner is not a mind reader to know what’s going on inside your head. A lack of communication only causes anger to build up on both sides.

“This can result in constant fighting in a relationship, which can be exhausting. You might even question if it is worth draining your energy over. But isn’t that what relationships are all about? You fight, apologize, forgive, and kiss each other. Not because you love fighting. Because you want to be with this person despite difficult times.

“However, that doesn’t mean you can start arguing anywhere and anytime. A mindful argument is very important. You need to pick the right time to voice out your concerns. If you are only fighting, bickering, complaining, and criticizing each other, then it’s unhealthy, and sooner or later it will take a toll on your mental health.”

Couples who argue focusing only on the fights and trying to prove the other person wrong without figuring out how to stop constant arguing in a relationship tend to drift apart. If you’ve been wondering how much arguing is not normal in a relationship, here are a few parameters than can help you assess when your clashes have veered into unhealthy territory:

• When you start disrespecting the other person
• When you start verbally abusing them
• When you are not fighting for the relationship but against the relationship 
• When you give ultimatums and threaten to leave them 

Related Reading: Top 35 Pet Peeves In Relationships

Pros And Cons Of Relationship Arguments 

Is it normal to fight every day in a relationship? Well, that depends on the kind of fights you’re having. Conflict can be an opportunity to learn more about the other person, heal, and grow together. Most people assume that it’s unhealthy when couples fight. But that’s hogwash. It brings more honesty into the relationship. However, as we said before, not all arguments are created equal and fights among couples have their share of pros and cons, which include: 

Pros:

• When couples argue, they learn about each other’s flaws, differences of opinions, and ways of thinking. It brings them closer by creating a deeper level of understanding. When you learn to manage and accept those differences, you will create a loving and peaceful relationship
• Conflicts can make you stronger as a couple. When you resolved a fight with, “I love you and I am glad we are talking about it”, it shows that you value your relationship more than your differences 
• When you sincerely apologize after a fight, it instills a feeling of purity and wholesomeness. You feel good about yourself and your relationship

Cons:

• When couples who argue resort to criticism and blame games, they end up using the “You” phrases like “You always”, “You never”, and “You only”. Such phrases make the other person feel guilty even if they aren’t on the wrong side
• When you don’t resolve an argument, you prolong the conflict. As a result, you feel angry, bitter, and hostile toward your partner
• Repeatedly fighting over the same thing can drive you away from your partner. They will begin to avoid you in order to avoid the argument 

Dos And Don’ts While Arguing With Your Partner 

Responding to the question, Is it normal to fight every day in a relationship?, a Reddit user says, “How often couples fight in a healthy relationship depends on how you define fighting and arguing in a relationship. Do all couples get into screaming matches? Probably not. Do all couples have disagreements from time to time? Yup. There are couples who argue more outwardly. Then there are couples who argue in a more passive-aggressive way. And then some couples just avoid problems. Every person handles and resolves conflict uniquely, so the dynamics of conflict resolution will also vary from couple to couple.”

Arguing couples should understand that there are a few rules of argument in a relationship. There are some dos and don’ts while handling conflicts. Here are some tips on how to fight in a relationship:

Dos	Don’ts
Always listen to their side of the story	Don’t keep focusing on complaints; keep your approach solution-oriented
Always use “I” statements to get your point across	Couples arguing should never use hyperbolic terms like “Always” and “Never”
Always remember that you are both on the same side. You are not fighting against each other but fighting together against a problem	Don’t make assumptions, criticize, or drag family members into your problems
Listen empathetically	Never downplay an issue or invalidate your partner’s concerns
Have cooling-off periods	Don’t hit below the belt or target their weaknesses
Show physical affection. Touch them even when you are having an argument	Don’t give ultimatums or threaten to leave the relationship
Own up to your mistakes and apologize	Once a conflict has been resolved, don’t bring it up in future arguments

Why Arguments Are Healthy 

“Why do we argue? Is it healthy to fight in relationships?” These questions may weigh on your mind after every argument with your SO. Responding to these questions, Riddhi says, “Irrespective of the causes of arguments, couples argue because they love each other and something one person did or said is bothering the other. You can’t let it go because then it becomes avoidance. It’s indifference that’s unhealthy, whereas relationship arguments are completely healthy because you are not sweeping the problems under the rug. You are showing you care and you want to fix the problems. 

“Is it normal to fight every day in a relationship? Yes, if the aim is to build a strong relationship. No, if all you want to do is vent your anger and criticize your partner. With the help of these little arguments in a relationship, you get to learn about each other’s triggers, traumas, and insecurities. You get to know each other’s value systems better. Arguments are also discussions between two people who aren’t on the same page but they are on the same team.”

Disagreements are bound to happen in relationships. You can even argue or disagree about things daily. As long as neither of you resorts to abuse or toxic tendencies like silent treatment or stonewalling, there’s nothing to worry about. I believe that spousal arguments are one of the ways of being vulnerable with the person you love. I used to be someone who froze at the thought of confrontation and preferred stonewalling when I was upset with my partner. However, over time, I learned the value and importance of arguing early in a relationship, thanks to my partner who has a unique ability to tell me where I’m going wrong without making me feel conscious, guilty, or insecure.

He asked me to do the same and speak up whenever I’m miffed with him instead of going inside my shell and staying there for weeks till I feel better. He made me realize how this is unfair toward him and how this was creating cracks in our relationship. We are newly married and we’re still learning how to argue properly in a relationship, but one thing is for sure, we argue and we argue a lot. But we never put down each other or threaten to leave the relationship. 

How To Handle Arguments In A Relationship

The purpose of any argument is to find the problem and cure it. When couples argue constantly, they often forget their ultimate destination, which is to find a solution. Fighting in relationships and how much is too much fighting becomes a crucial question when all you do is bicker and argue, and don’t know how to let go of resentment long after the conflict has been resolved. If the objective is to win an argument with your spouse, then you’ve already lost. Here are some tips on how to handle fights with your partner that can help arguing couples resolve conflicts more skillfully:

• If your partner is hurt because of your actions, accept it. Apologize and take responsibility for your wrongdoings
• Learn to compromise. You can’t have your way every single time. If you want to peacefully resolve an argument, then this is the way to go about it
• If one partner withdraws, don’t force them back into the fight. Don’t chase them around screaming or yelling
• When couples argue, they often forget that they are in a heated discussion with someone they love and end up saying things that they will regret. Never forget that you love this person and wouldn’t want to hurt them intentionally
• Once an argument has been put to rest, don’t resurrect it in another argument

Just because you are fighting a lot doesn’t mean your relationship is headed to a dead-end. When handled right, they can help improve your compatibility as a couple. If your fights are becoming overwhelming and nothing seems to alleviate the negativity, you must consider couples counseling to find the root cause of your problems. If you’re looking for professional help, Bonobology’s panel of experienced counselors is only a click away.  

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The healthcare industry is constantly evolving, with new developments, policy shifts, and technological advancements opening up a world of opportunities for professionals in the field. In the aftermath of the recent pandemic, the healthcare industry is in dire need of qualified individuals in healthcare administration to improve patient care and effectively manage operations in a time-compressed environment.

If you’re passionate about healthcare and want to make a difference in the industry without being a clinical employee, a career in healthcare administration is a perfect choice. Best of all, there are some amazing career opportunities that the field of healthcare administration can offer. Continue reading as we highlight the importance of healthcare administration in the industry and provide a list of different roles you could pursue after earning a health management degree. 

Healthcare administration is a field that encompasses a variety of roles and responsibilities, from managing healthcare facilities to overseeing operations and finances and making strategic decisions that focuses on improving the quality of patient care. It’s a dynamic and challenging field that requires analytical and compassionate individuals who have a strong desire to improve the quality of care that patients receive. 

If you’re seeking a career in healthcare administration, a master’s degree in health management or an MBA with concentration in healthcare administration can equip you with the skills and knowledge you need to succeed in this dynamic and challenging field. 

An MBA in healthcare management combines business education with specialized training in healthcare administration, giving you a comprehensive understanding of the healthcare industry, including healthcare policy, finance, and operations. The program also provides you with the opportunity to develop leadership and management skills that are essential for running healthcare organizations effectively. 

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With an MBA in healthcare management, you’ll be well-positioned to take on high-profile and leadership roles in top-notch healthcare organizations and advance your career in the industry.

Whether you’re just starting your career or looking to make a change, there are plenty of options to consider in this exciting and growing field. So, let’s dive in and explore what healthcare administration has to offer:

1. Healthcare Consultant

Healthcare consultants are one of the most in-demand professionals in the healthcare administration field. They play a crucial role in helping healthcare facilities run smoothly. Healthcare consultants work closely with healthcare organizations to conduct in-depth research on the existing operations, identify potential problems and performance gaps, and develop solutions to improve or remodel operations in a healthcare facility. They can guide staff on healthcare safety regulations, medical best practices, insurance compliance, and implementation of healthcare standards.

To become a healthcare consultant, you must have a master’s degree in health administration, as this provides a strong foundation in healthcare management and business principles. You will require problem-solving skills and industry-specific knowledge and skills to analyze healthcare systems and implement effective solutions that can improve patient outcomes and increase operational efficiency.

As the healthcare industry continues to grow and evolve, the need for qualified healthcare consultants is only expected to increase, making it one of the most in-demand professions. 

Also Read: 7 Things to Know Before Pursuing an Online Nursing Degree

2. Nursing Home Administrator

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If you’re someone who has a passion for healthcare and enjoys managing organizational and business aspects of a healthcare or nursing facility, then you might want to consider a career as a nursing home administrator. Not only do these professionals play a crucial role in ensuring that long-term care facilities operate smoothly, but they also get to work closely with patients and their families to provide the best possible care.

As a nursing home administrator, you’ll have a variety of responsibilities, including:

• Keeping abreast of any changes in regulations and medical standards.
• Guiding medical and administration staff.
• Creating budgets and maintaining finances.
• Managing and monitoring healthcare staff performance.
• Supervising mundane processes.
• Ensuring delivery of quality patient care.
• Scheduling training sessions for both healthcare and administration staff.

Also Read: How To Choose A Most Suitable Salon Pos System?

3. Health Insurance Manager

If you have a knack for understanding the intricacies of health insurance, then you should consider a career as a health insurance manager. A health insurance manager plays a crucial role in helping patients navigate the complex world of healthcare insurance, ensuring they receive the coverage they need to receive proper medical care.

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Patients often find it difficult to understand the intricacies of health insurance plans, which can lead to stress, confusion, and uncertainty. Health insurance managers help patients understand health insurance policies, their benefits, and ways to file claims. 

As a health insurance manager, you’ll be responsible for coding claims, processing patient bills, developing benefit plans, and ensuring patients receive the care covered in the medical insurance without undue financial burden. 

4. Practice Administrator/ Practice Manager

Small private healthcare and medical practices, particularly, rely on talented practice administrators or managers to keep their operations running smoothly. They are responsible for managing and supervising everything from staff recruitment to staff management, appraisal, contract negotiation, employee training, and budgeting. They’re also responsible for managing other areas of a healthcare facility, such as office administration, finance, reporting, and maintaining office facilities.

Practice administrators are highly educated professionals who possess exceptional interpersonal and organizational skills. They are often the go-to person for solving problems, managing staff, and ensuring regulatory compliance. With a combination of business and healthcare knowledge and exceptional organizational and leadership skills, you’ll be well-prepared to take on this important role.

5. Director of Training and Development 

In today’s fast-paced and constantly evolving healthcare industry, having well-trained and skilled professionals on your team is essential. That’s why healthcare organizations are always looking for a training and development director who can help maintain and improve the education and skills of their employees.

As a director of training and development, you will play a crucial role in developing and implementing training programs that ensure the staff provides the highest quality care to their patients. You’ll work closely with both management and healthcare professionals to assess employee performance and identify areas for improvement. You’ll also be responsible for coordinating in-house training sessions and sourcing external training programs that will benefit the staff.

Final Thoughts

Healthcare administration is a dynamic and growing field that offers a range of career opportunities. Whether you’re interested in managing a hospital or clinic, working in health insurance or consulting, or overseeing training and development programs, there’s a healthcare administration career that can match your interests and skills. By pursuing a degree in healthcare administration and gaining relevant work experience, you can position yourself for a rewarding and fulfilling career in this vital sector. So explore your options and take the first step towards your dream career in healthcare administration today!

If being in love is the most beautiful feeling, being betrayed is undoubtedly the most devastating. It can understandably break your heart if the person you invested your body, soul and emotions in turns out to be a cheat in love. However, there’s a catch. If trust is the bedrock of all healthy relationships, suspicion is the weak link that creates havoc. That’s when you need to ask – Is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Many marriages have hit the rocks after unfounded accusations of cheating being hurled by one partner on the other, only to realize how wrong they were. Unfortunately, by this time, the relationship has already soured. Does this mean that you need to let your guard down?

Certainly not! While trust is a key cornerstone of a healthy relationship, blind faith can leave you completely blindsided. So, while it’s essential to not ignore the red flags of infidelity, there is a difference between genuine doubt and constant paranoia about cheating. And that’s what you will recognize as you read below.

What Is The Difference Between Paranoia And Suspicion?

Amanda noticed inexplicable transaction on her husband Jude’s account. She thought worrying about cheating is pointless, so she went ahead and confronted him. Jude was caught off-guard and couldn’t give a convincing reply. Amanda now started noticing other things. An emotional withdrawal, frequent all nighters, diminishing sex life. She gradually grew more suspicious of him.

Dani was feeling something similar in her relationship. Ever since Dani and her husband Tom had had their first child, Dani had developed a fear that Tom was going to grow apart in marriage. “After all, that is what my father had done. That is what men do!” she thought. Tom was a caring husband, now also a doting father. But Dani kept looking for reasons why he would leave her and seeking evidences of his infidelity. She was paranoid that he was going to abandon her for his freedom.

Do you notice the difference between the usage of the words “suspicious” and “paranoid”? While Amanda’s mistrust in her relationship is based on evidence, Dani’s constant paranoia about cheating exists despite anything concrete she can put her finger on. Moreover, Amanda has reasons to believe there is someone else or some where else her husband is spending his time, money and emotions at. Her fears are centered within a limited scope.

On the other hand, Dani’s suspicions are wider in scope, centered around abandonment issues. She thinks she will be left alone. In fact, Tom cheating is only one way he will abandon her. Her cheating paranoia could also change forms into something else to prove her fears. She could worry that her husband could die and leave her alone to raise the child by herself.

In simple words, paranoia is extreme fear that is not based in evidence and therefore sounds unreasonable, e.g. obsessive thoughts about spouse cheating due to causes of insecurity. A paranoid person tries to prove their paranoia in one way or the other. If evidence is produced against their belief, they would rather assume that they were being lied to than allowing their fears and doubts to be cleared. While, suspicion is a fear based in evidence or a reason for it to exist.

Is He Cheating or Am I Paranoid – 11 Signs That Will Tell You The Truth

Sustaining a relationship is a real challenge. You need to continuously make efforts to keep the spark alive but that should come from a space of love and not fear – fear of being left alone or betrayed. Constant paranoia about cheating can be maddening. But why does this fear arise? Love coach and YouTuber Heidi blames it on your belief system.

“If you operate from the belief that men and women cheat, it will affect your romantic behavior. Much as you love him, you will not be able to share your fears or inadequacies resulting in relationship-related anxiety, feelings of being overwhelmed and rejected all of which lead to confrontational behavior, searching for evidence and doing crazy things,” she says.

“The core issue is that your belief system says you are not enough or are not worthy of being loved. When you feel unworthy, you either pick on people who cheat on you or make you feel they will,” she adds explaining the context when suspicion leads to paranoia. Do you often wonder, “Why am I so paranoid about my boyfriend cheating on me”? This ought to give you some perspective on your behavior pattern.

That being said. not all doubts are unfounded. Cheating in relationships is not uncommon. The question is – what do you do about it? First and foremost, know that worrying about cheating is pointless unless you have a solid reason to believe that your partner is betraying your trust.

And how do you know it? What do you do when you have a strong gut feeling he’s cheating but no proof? Watch out for the obvious and subtle signs and then, most importantly, think whether your partner’s actions unequivocally point to his transgressions. We have listed 11 tell-tale signs that women often speak of when they suspect their partners. See if they apply to you and what they mean….

Related Reading: Signs Your Husband Is Having An Affair

1. He is secretive about his phone

Are you saying: He constantly changes his passwords, hates it when I try and peek into his phone and snatches it away from me if I dare touch it. He becomes edgy and doesn’t like anyone answering his phone if he is busy. Also, he spends hours speaking to someone at a particular time. Are these signs he’s cheating on his phone? I wonder whether it’s a good idea to secretly check his phone but that device phone is more fiercely protected than the classified documents at the CIA. All of this gives me a strong gut feeling he’s cheating but no proof.

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Our phones mirror our lives these days. But strangely, even in very strong relationships, couples do not like it if their partners peek into their phones. Some chats are personal so they might not appreciate it. These are not obvious signs he’s cheating on his phone. If he acts too edgy, spends long hours whispering into the phone, then that’s odd, and you need to figure out what’s going on.

2. He goes out too frequently without telling me

Are you saying: Earlier, he would inform me about his whereabouts. But of late, he has been staying out way too often and way too late. He doesn’t pick up calls and when I ask him, he is usually evasive. When I make a plan, he usually finds he has an alternative plan. If I try to talk to him about it, he blames it on my constant paranoia about cheating and calls me insecure. Argh! Why am I so paranoid of being cheated on?

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Men can stay out for a number of reasons (maybe he just loves going out with the lads!). Perhaps, he is being evasive or hiding details about this routine because he fears that telling you he is chilling with his friends will lead to arguments and fights. Your antenna should be up only if he has no answers. Even so, look at your tone. Is it accusatory? Does he feel like you are nagging and clinging? Give him space for a bit but watch out.

3. He is obsessed about his looks and fitness

Are you saying: He is on a shopping spree. He goes to the salon far more frequently. He has changed his style completely. He used to hate red, now he wears red shirts! He has become a gym regular when earlier he used to hate it. I think I am being cheated upon, definitely! It’s like he is not even the same person I got into a relationship with, and I’m paranoid about cheating.

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: This is a worrying sign if you are in a long-term relationship. If your partner has indeed found a new love, he may try and change his looks. But first, find out if it’s because of a new realization about the need to stay fit and healthy or if there is something more to it. Change of appearance or being health conscious are not always signs of infidelity.

Related Reading: 15 Warning Traits Of A Serial Cheater – Don’t Be His Next Victim

4. Something seems artificial in our relationship

Are you saying: He is just the same – kind, affectionate and caring. But something seems amiss. He looks lost. When he shows affection, it’s like he is play-acting. It doesn’t appear to come naturally. The effort shows as he acts withdrawn. I have a gut feeling he’s cheating but no proof. How do I stop worrying about him cheating?

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Australian dating coach Mark Rosenfeld has an answer for this. “Maybe he is stressed at work, there may be money issues or even bedroom problems. He doesn’t want to talk about it, so is withdrawn. Do not freak out. He may be innocent, you don’t know yet. So first things first, take a deep breath and don’t give in to irrational fears.”

5. His social media is getting out of control

Are you saying: He is spending way too much time on FB and Instagram. It feels like gadgets are ruining our relationship because he is constantly glued to one. If he is not on his phone, he’s browsing social media platforms on his laptop or tablet. I see his profiles everywhere and he is changing his DP way too often. Why would he do that unless he is trying to impress someone? Also, he does not post pics of us together.

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Social media is a strange beast. The need to change one’s DP often or spending hours on Instagram getting the right filter reflects a need to seek validation. So, how to stop thinking your partner is cheating? Do not overreact at his social media game. How about giving him the taste of his own medicine and upping your social media profile, and see his reaction? It will give you answers.

6. His friends are all those who are not loyal

Are you saying: I dislike his friends. Somehow they all seem to be having affairs left, right and center. However, he does not appear to have any problems with such behavior. He even thinks it’s ‘cool’ to have an affair or two. I have a gut feeling he’s cheating too and hides it well.

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Do you have any proof of his infidelity? Or are you paranoid just because he has cheating friends? Agreed, peer pressure can be a strong influence. We can also understand how this would leave you paranoid about cheating in your relationship. But him telling you their stories are signs he’s not cheating on you. Relax, use this opportunity to talk to him about YOUR views and the boundaries in your relationship.

Related Reading: 12 signs your husband is having sex outside the marriage

7. Gosh, he’s on Tinder

Are you saying: I realized that he is on Tinder and has been chatting up single women. He has put up a picture that I recognize too. Why would a man in a committed relationship ever be on a dating app? What if he is meeting those women? If these are not signs he’s cheating on his phone, what will be? Why do I keep thinking about my partner cheating? But this is not constant paranoia about cheating, this is proof!

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Sorry to break your heart but there are a lot of committed men and women on dating apps. Sure, it sucks and you should not take it lying down. Probably he is not having an affair just yet, and he may be purely looking for some harmless flirting. Even so, this is not a very promising sign for the future of your relationship, so do not let it go without making your displeasure and disapproval known.

8. Our sex life isn’t great anymore

Are you saying: The passion is missing. He just doesn’t seem to be interested in making love anymore. Often, even if I initiate it, he doesn’t reciprocate my advances. It seems as if he has lost interest in me sexually. And on the rare occasions that we have sex, the zing is completely gone. It seems like a chore more than anything else.

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Maybe the spark has genuinely gone out of your relationship. Sexual chemistry is hard to maintain but if despite your efforts, he shows no interest it could mean two extremes – a physical issue or an affair. Men who cheat generally find it difficult to get intimate with their partners. You will have to tread this one carefully.

9.  I have a gut feeling he’s cheating

Are you saying: Why does he not answer some calls in front of me? Isn’t it one of the telling signs he’s cheating on his phone? Why does he become defensive when I ask him questions? Why does he seem uneasy on certain occasions? Why does he dodge questions about his movements and schedules? There are no sure-shot signs but I have strong instincts and I think I am being cheated upon. I have a gut feeling he’s cheating but no proof, what should I do?

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: You shouldn’t entirely ignore your gut feeling, says Mark Rosenfeld. “Your gut is all about that niggling feeling you can’t get rid of. But you must get an answer without messing with your relationship.” One suggestion he gives is to write down every single behavior that makes you doubtful. “If the list grows long and more suspicious, only then take action,” he says.

Related Reading: 12 Reasons Why Men Have Extramarital Affairs

10. We have been having too many arguments

Are you saying: We are arguing too much these days. The smallest disagreements snowball into massive relationship arguments. In a fit of anger, he has even suggested that he is unhappy in the relationship. What’s worse, it is always me who has to make up after a fight. It appears he has no interest in patching up. Is it because he has already found someone else? Why would he ignore me?

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: Arguing or fighting, as such, is not a sign that he has moved on but if he loses interest in you because he is interested in someone else, there won’t be much effort on his part to patch up after a fight. Observe his behavior and attitude after a fight. Does he look hurt and angry or just uncaring? If it’s the latter, it’s probably because he might have a shoulder to lean on.

11. He has cheated before

Are you saying: It has happened before too. I caught him red-handed but he promised to mend his ways and we got back together. However, I am unable to shake off the feeling that it might happen again. I know why am I so paranoid about my boyfriend cheating on me – because there is evidence to suggest that he is capable of it. What if he is cheating on me behind my back? What is the guarantee I won’t be able to prevent it?

So… is he cheating or am I paranoid?

Our view: If you have been betrayed before, it is difficult to rebuild trust in the relationship. The cracks will always show up and the small signs that you would have otherwise ignored would come to haunt you. There is no guarantee he will stay loyal but there is no surety that he will go down that path again. Work from your trust and not your fears. Always keep communicating to prevent a relapse.

What To Do If It Is Paranoia?

Fear of being betrayed is very real but you should stop feeding that monster and stop worrying about whether he’ll cheat or not, unless and until you actually have proof. To handle it, first, you need to work on your own self-esteem and self-worth.

Living with constant paranoia about being cheated on and constantly grappling with insecurities about the future of your relationship can take its toll. “Why am I so paranoid of being cheated on?” “Why do I keep thinking about my partner cheating?” If you’re struggling to work through these troubling emotions and want to get to the root of these triggers, seeking counseling can be immensely beneficial.

You may be suffering from abandonment issues, or low self-worth. What is causing it? And how to stop thinking your partner is cheating on you when there is nothing out of the ordinary? You need a professional who can work with you and reach the root of your issues, which very often are childhood traumas and buried grief.

You do not deserve to be with anyone who makes you feel constantly on the edge but you are not helping your cause by being needlessly paranoid. Being wary, being on the guard is good but jumping on assumptions, always looking for ‘evidence’ (which may or may not exist) will cause you more harm than good. Work on the fundamentals of your relationship and then decide what you want to do if your partner is indeed cheating on you. Make this about you, not him, or her.

What To Do If Your Partner Is Cheating

Like we just said, “Make this about you!” If you have just found out your partner has been cheating on you, a lot may probably change in your relationship, your life, your perspective toward things like independence, trust, love and happiness. You must ready yourself and do the following:

• Allow yourself the shock: You are going to be shocked when you first realize that your obsessive thoughts about spouse cheating were not invalid. Allow yourself time and space to feel all the emotions that are going to surface in you. Shock, anger, pain
• Reach out to a friend/family member: You do not want to be alone with your emotions for a long time. If there is anyone you trust to hold your hand, reach out to them and tell them what you are going through. Seek their support
• Get tested for STIs: Even without your wish your monogamous two way sexual relationship has crossed its threshold into the unknown. It is always better to be safe than sorry. Get yourself tested for Sexually Transmitted Diseases and Infections, especially if you had been fluid bonding with your partner
• Give your partner the chance to explain: Allow your partner the chance to explain before reaching major decisions. Their response might change the course of your relationship for the better. If not anything, it will allow you to ask questions, receive answers, and have a closure
• Evaluate your options: A lot of marriages and relationships successfully survive infidelity. A break up is not the only option. Your current reality, your needs, the health status of the relationship before the crisis, the background to the crisis, the commitment to making amends your partner is showing, there surely is a lot to weigh in such a scenario. Take your time to evaluate your options
• Seek professional help: A separation counselor and/or a grief counselor will provide you with the perspective, guidance and hand-holding you need at such a crucial time

By now, you have either felt relief that you might only be suffering from cheating paranoia and your partner still loves you. Or you could have found out that there is valid reason behind your suspicion. No matter where you stand, professional help can be of immense help to you to deal with your paranoia which often reoccurs and can destroy relationships. It will also be helpful to deal with the uncertainty and grief a cheating partner brings.

You can reach out to licensed and experienced therapists on Bonobology’s panel from the comfort of your home. Help is only a click away.

FAQs

How To Find Out If Your Partner Is Cheating Online?

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Advantages And Disadvantages Of Late Marriages For Women

Artificial turf is becoming increasingly popular for both interior and exterior spaces. If you’re looking to add some greenery to your home or office, these are the four top design trends to consider. From realistic-looking grasses to low-maintenance options, there’s something for everyone. So take a look and see which artificial turf trend is right for you.

Introduce the topic of artificial turf and its many benefits

Artificial turf has become a popular, versatile option for many interior and exterior spaces. Not only does it look great when installed correctly, but it also offers numerous advantages over traditional grass and other surfaces. Synthetic turf is low maintenance in that you don’t need to water or fertilize it, and its even surface eliminates the need to mow or trim. It’s also incredibly durable and can withstand heavy foot traffic without deteriorating. What’s more, synthetic turf can help keep a space cool by reflecting sunlight in addition to contributing to environmentally friendly practices such as climate change prevention and reduction of water use. With these benefits in mind, many people are beginning to explore the different design trends associated with artificial turf for their interior and exterior spaces.

Discuss the top 4 design trends for artificial turf – modern, natural, eco-friendly, and versatile

With artificial turf, designing both interior and exterior spaces has never been easier. There are four key artificial grass design trends to consider when transforming any space – modern, natural, eco-friendly, and versatile. For a sleek and contemporary look, artificial grass in Edmond OK can be installed with a modern design in mind. Natural-looking artificial turf is perfect for outdoor areas that still need to retain a sense of realism. Additionally, artificial grass is extremely eco-friendly due to its recyclability and low water needs; certain artificial turf can even absorb UV rays! Finally, artificial turf is highly versatile; it can be applied anywhere from rooftops to patches of lawn around businesses or homes. All of these options make artificial turf an excellent choice for any remodeling project.

Give examples of how each trend can be used in both interior and exterior spaces

Artificial turf is now being used in an array of interior and exterior applications, bringing a unique texture and design element to these spaces. There are four top artificial turf design trends that designers can incorporate into their project plans. For interior environments, the use of embroidered logos or faux grass carpets can add a unique statement. Exterior designs can benefit from using landscape-turf grass with bright colors to create playful havens. Application of accent tufts over stone pieces or walls gives simple designs a fiery backdrop, while putting artificial turf on ramps and stairs provides safety and extra traction for pedestrians. Designers also shouldn’t forget to consider cost when incorporating each trend as artificial turf comes in different price points for every budget.

Provide tips on how to choose the right type of artificial turf for your home or business

When choosing the right type of artificial turf for your home or business, it’s important to consider the 4 top design trends – texture, durability, environmental impact, and color. Artificial turf has come a long way from its early days, and now offers a wide range of textures and levels of durability to choose from while also having a lower impact on the environment than traditional grass lawns. You should also think about the color you want to add to your space – artificial turf can be found in several shades of green or yellow that could brighten up any exterior or interior environment. Above all else, it’s essential to factor in where you plan to use the artificial turf so that it is tailored specifically for you and your needs.

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Artificial turf has come a long way since its early days and is now being used in more creative ways than ever before. If you’re considering adding artificial turf to your home or business, be sure to consider the top 4 design trends – modern, natural, eco-friendly, and versatile. With so many options available, you’re sure to find the perfect type of artificial turf for your needs.

Being a glib talker not only requires great confidence, but also some enthralling one-liners. Men swoon over fascinating personalities but they also fancy some great wit and effort in the conversation.

To help you on the front, we’ve put together 100 cute pickup lines for guys, that will come to your rescue whenever you find yourself struggling to break the ice.

100 Pickup Lines For Guys To Seal The Deal

Being fun and flirty is sort of like an art. With the right words for the right situation, you can easily seem seductive and turn your night into a romantic and sexy affair! From sexy pick up lines for men to clever, catchy and romantic ones, there is no dearth of conversation starters that you can use to make him sit up and take notice.

To amp up your flirting game, keep these 100 pick-up lines handy, and use the ones that best suit your style, and of course, the context:  

Funny Pickup Lines For Him

Your pickup lines should be like a breath of fresh air; light and breezy. If the ice breakers makes him smile, then you are on the right path. We’re here to help you, gorgeous girl! Here are some funny pickup lines for him:

Related Reading: Lust Vs Love Quiz

1. You might just get arrested. It is illegal to look this good 
2. Is your name Plank? Cause every minute with you feels like a lifetime
3. Are you my homework? Cause I’m not doing you but I definitely should be
4. Do you play soccer? Because I think I’m gonna score tonight
5. If you were a fruit, you’d be a ‘fineapple’
6. If being in love was illegal, would you be my partner in crime? 
7. Are you a banana? Cause I think you’re a-peel-ing 
8. I like you a latte!
9. Is there an airport around here? Because my heart is set to take off 
10. What would it take for you to drunk dial me? 
11. You might be suffering from lack of vitamin me
12. Chuck ‘love at first sight’, do you believe in ‘love at first swipe’?
13. Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you
14. Are you a band-aid? Because taking you off me hurts like hell
15. If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?
16. Your hand looks heavy—can I hold it for you?
17. You are hotter than the bottom of my laptop
18. Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?
19. Can I be your 90 degree angle? I want to be just right for you! 
20. I’m here now. What were your other two wishes?

Cheesy Pickup Lines For Him

If you’re done with goofy conversation starters and want to use words to make his heart melt, this is the section for you. It’s just you and your cringe self against the world. Let’s go! Here are some cheesy pickup lines for him:

Related Reading: 10 Signs Your Relationship Will Last Forever

1. If I had a penny for every time you entered my mind I’d have only one. Because you never leave
2. Would you grab my arm? So I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel
3. Do you have a name? Or can I call you mine?
4. Is heaven your quarantine zone? Because you look like an angel
5. I may not be Christian but I’ll still get on my knees for you
6. Do you have a map? Because I’m lost in your eyes 
7. Is your father a florist? Because you have made my life rosy 
8. Can you lend me a sweet kiss? I swear to give it back
9. As a triangle, you’d be acute one
10. I look at you the way I look at chocolate cake
11. You’re just like Netflix because I can watch you for hours
12. I took a photography course once and I really can picture us together 
13. Are you French? Because Eiffel for you
14. Your shirt looks like it’s boyfriend material
15. Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I can really feel a connection here
16. I’m not a organ donor but I would give you my heart 
17. They say Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth. Well, they didn’t stand next to you
18. Is your dad a baker? Because you’re a cutie pie
19. Hey, you’re pretty and I’m cute. Together we’d be Pretty Cute
20. Do you want to get some soup? Because I’m ready to spoon

Nerdy Pickup Lines For Guys

If the guy you like has been a total nerd all his life, it’s time to make him a part of your world. Adding meaning to mainstream pickup lines can work out really well for you. Use these clever pickup lines for him and thank us later:

Related Reading: How To Be A Better Lover – 11 Pro Tips By A Sex Therapist

1. Girl, it’s a miracle that Galileo never found you. If he did he would say the earth revolves around you
2. Hey, are you a Marvel villain? Because you are an abomination
3. If I can rearrange the alphabets, I’ll put U and I together
4. Hey, are you made from Selenium and Xenon? Cuz u look SeXe
5. You’re like a battery. You revive my soul whenever we touch
6. Did we take a class together in high school? Cause I can feel some Chemistry here
7. If you like water, you already like 70% of me
8.  Are you a keyboard? Because you are just my type!
9. My life without you is like a broken pencil – simply pointless
10. Is this the Hogwarts Express? Because it feels like you and I are headed somewhere magical
11. I’m learning about the important dates in history. Wanna be one of them?
12. Are you a time traveler? Because I see you in my future
13. Do you have a bank loan? Coz I got an interest in you
14. God bless life insurance, because my heart stopped when I saw you
15. It’s a good thing I’ve got my library card because I’m totally checking you out
16. I’d gaze at you in a museum cause you truly are a work of art 
17. Do you like Star Wars? Because Yoda only one for me!
18. Can I have your significant digits?
19. You’re so good at algebra, could you replace my X without asking Y?
20. You must be related to Nikola Tesla because you are electrifying

Dirty Pickup Lines For Him

If you’re up to say something bold, then here are some creative pickup lines to your rescue. Who would have thought one-liners could make you look so sexy! Don’t believe us? Then, use these pickup lines to make him blush and find out for yourself:

Related Reading: 45 Sexy, Dirty Text Messages For Your Boyfriend

1. You will satisfy all my cravings! You are one hell of a snack
2. Be the 6 to my 9 
3. Let us fall madly in bed together
4. Your lips look a little lonely. Care to be with mine?
5. My week has been really off but being with you has turned me on
6. No matter which way the coin-toss goes, I’ll give you head or tail
7. Are your pants on sale? Because they will be 100% off in no time 
8. If you were a pair of Nike sneakers, I would be in and out of you all day
9. I’m new around here. Can you point me in the direction of your bedroom?
10. I need to complain to Spotify. You should have been my hottest single this week
11. Tell me your biggest regret. Mine is not kissing you last night
12. You’re like a bottle of fine wine. I wanna take my time sipping and smelling you
13. Are those space pants? Because your ass is out of control!
14. I’ve lost my teddy bear! Can I sleep with you instead?
15. I’m an astronaut and my next mission is to explore Uranus
16. My computer server never goes down, but I do
17. Can I buy you your favorite drink and then help you burn off the calories?
18. I find your lack of nudity disturbing
19. Are you Aquaman? Because you sure do make me wet
20. Those seem like very expensive clothes, too bad I’ll be ripping through them tonight

Pickup Lines For Introverts

Introverts take a long time to open up. So if you or your love interest is an introvert, you need a different flirting approach altogether to break the ice. So, here are some classic pickup lines for introverts:

Related Reading: 9 Tips To Make An Introvert And Extrovert Relationship Work

1. Want to Netflix and avoid humanity for 7 hours?
2. When can I see you next? Pick a day that ends with ‘y’
3. I suck at starting conversations. You wanna try?
4. Let’s skip the small talk and go straight to flirting!
5. Your eyes are so beautiful you made me forget my pick-up line 
6. Let’s make plans and then cancel them
7. I’d go out in public, just for you. Maybe
8. Do you want to go shopping with me? Online…so we don’t have to deal with other people
9. I’ll steal your heart but not your alone time
10. Are you a pair of noise-cancelling headphones? Because you make my life more bearable
11. Hey girl, want to party with me? It’s not really a party. It’s actually a book club, and there’s a cat
12. Can I have your number so that I can just text you but literally never call?
13. Hey, I bought you this book. That’s it, that’s the line
14. This conversation is exhausting me — can we just have sex now?
15. I’m terrible at small talk, but I make a killer playlist
16. Let’s share our quietness together. Forever
17. Girl, are you my feet? Because I can’t look away from you!
18. I’m just going to stand here and watch you from a comfortable distance
19. I’m not drunk. I am intoxicated by you
20. Do you have a sunburn or are you always this hot

Finally, the corny pickup lines given above are just words on a page. You have to make sure your delivery is spot-on and that you land them well. Don’t forget to use some eye contact and a subtle body language. The only tip to remember while using pickup lines for flirting with guys: be yourself and keep that smile going!

How Do Introverts Flirt? 10 Ways They Try To Get Your Attention

What To Do When A Woman Is Flirting With Your Husband At Work

Foreplay: More Than Just a Warm-Up 

Over the years, it has been the concern of many diamond buyers if the diamonds they bought were produced ethically. This drastic concern spurred industry diamond leaders to implement better working conditions, from safety to wages, distribution, and even supply chain tracking.

With much appreciation and gratitude, changes have occurred. Today, the Kimberly Process’ is one of the most recognized methods for producing ethical conflict-free diamonds.

The diamonds available on Rare Carat follow the Kimberly Process, and thus, all are conflict-free, meaning there is no association with any sort of conflict from very low wages, poor working conditions, safety, human rights concerns, and more.

Rare Carat ranks number one in America’s diamond online marketplace, not just because of the ‘Kimberly Process but also because of the exceptional customer service, fast delivery, unbiased advice, tailored recommendations, and competitive pricing.

Diamond Origins

Knowing where a diamond originated from and how it came to be is important to distinguish them wisely. Normally, they are formed from a deep part of the earth and crystallize over millions of years.

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Later they burst out from pipes ‘deep underground and formed the deposits that are excavated today. While companies resort to technology and machines extract them, some people exploit poor communities by making them perform manual labor.

Now, as technology advances and awareness rises among consumers and investors grown throughout the years. The diamond industry has created ways to source their diamonds ethically by establishing a firm commitment that no blood diamonds and any unethical practices will be tolerated.

Exploitation Leads to Blood Diamonds

In addition to the backbreaking, underpaid labor, the mined gems are used for trade, fund civil or internal wars within the country, and sustain illegal activities. With warlords and rebels threatening and terrorizing locals, they can enslave people to dig up these precious rare gems and sell them, resulting in wars. The cruelty and violence that come with diamonds mined in these conditions are known as ‘blood diamonds.’

The Advantage of Purchasing a Lab-Made Diamond

With issues arising from blood diamonds, lab-grown gems were made to increase the market’s trust. Rare Carat has partnered with ethical vendors to create exquisite luxurious gems that have the same and identical chemical composition and physical appearance as precious natural gems; people can have peace of mind and assurance that the diamonds they purchased from Rare Carat are ethical and genuine.

How much is a lab-grown diamond?

The price of a lab-grown diamond can range from $1,000 to $2,000. The price of a lab-grown diamond will vary depending on the cut, shape, carat weight, color, clarity, and certification. Buyers looking for the best place to buy lab-grown diamonds can feel confident with Rare Carat, and their reliable team of expert gemologists has verified every vendor and where their sources come from, as well as the process it takes took to produce them.

Certifications

Rare Carat is known for its stand to procure the finest, the highest quality, and conflict-free diamonds. To minimize and prevent circumstances that involve blood diamonds, The United Nations developed ‘Kimberley Process, which requires their member countries to undergo a certification procedure and ensure they are conflict-free.

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The diamonds people buy at Rare Carat are certified with Kimberley Certification. With solid proof of certification, one cannot doubt the authenticity of the diamonds they buy. Proving not only ethical practices but the earned reputation of a vendor.

The Rare Carat team is always ready to answer any inquiries that may arise with their diamonds. The mined gems have to be certified during the entire process, from mining, polishing, and cutting to selling. Rare Carat pride itself as a supplier of conflict-free diamonds and obtained Kimberly Certification.

Conclusion

Gifting diamonds need not come with the price of harming people and contributing to the illegal activities of shady organizations. Rare Carat lives up to the reputation of selling only ethically sourced, conflict-free diamonds. Rare Carat’s esteemed status comes from its advocacy and transparency.

The value of high-quality diamonds does not compromise the safety of people and their living conditions. It’s not surprising that with these ethics in mind, Buyers can rest confident that whether they choose a natural or lab-created diamond, all are ethically sourced and strictly follows the Kimberly Process.

Are you looking for the perfect diamond USA? With so many options out there, it can be hard to know which one is right for you and your budget.

This is where the Rare Carat comes in. As America’s #1 source of unbiased advice for diamond engagement rings, they compare over a million natural and lab-grown diamonds at trusted retailers so that you can find the best quality at an affordable price.

In this guide, we will explain how to evaluate the quality of a diamond on Rare Carat with their free gemologist checks and 4 Cs Diamond Buying Guide – so that when it comes time to purchase your 5-carat diamond ring or any other piece of jewelry, you are confident knowing exactly what kind of stone you are getting!

How to Evaluate the Quality of a Diamond on Rare Carat?

When it comes time to buy a diamond, there are many factors that come into play. From price and size to quality and appearance – with so many choices available, it can be difficult for consumers in the USA to make an informed decision about which diamond is right for them.

However, by using Rare Carat’s easy-to-use tools, buyers can assess the quality of diamonds quickly and accurately – helping them find their perfect stone without any hassle or worry. Whether you’re looking at a 5-carat diamond ring for sale or something smaller in size, here is how you can evaluate diamonds online with ease at Rare Carat!

An Introduction To The 4 C’s Of Diamond Buying

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 When assessing the value of a rough diamond before cutting or polishing has taken place – jewelry experts use what’s known as “The 4 C’s Of Diamond Buying.” This method covers four key criteria:

• Cut (the shape & angles),
• Color (or lack thereof),
• Clarity (degree of blemishes)
• Carats (size)

By referencing these core measurements against each other – prices are determined according to their rarity and quality.

Evaluating Your Diamond With Rare Carat’s Tools

At Rare Carat, buyers can access an array of helpful tools to help them assess the value of a diamond quickly & accurately – no matter what size or budget they’re shopping within! By selecting your preferred criteria in terms of Cut, Color Clarity & Carats – you can immediately filter through over a million natural and lab grown diamonds at trusted retailers to find the perfect stone for you more easily than ever before!

GIA-Certified Diamonds For Added Assurance

For further assurance that your chosen diamond is authentic and high-quality, Rare Carat offers free gemologist checks on all GIA-certified diamonds for sale on their website – guaranteeing transparency throughout every step of the buying process from start to finish! This means customers have peace of mind knowing that their purchase is backed up by one of America’s most respected independent labs, offering total confidence when it comes to investing in something as precious as a 5 carat diamond ring (or any other size!)

The Rare Carat Help Center: An Invaluable Resource for Jewelry Shoppers

With a knowledgeable staff, up-to-date information on diamond pricing, and best practices in the industry, it’s no wonder why shoppers turn to the Rare Carat Help Center time and time again when looking for advice or guidance. The team has years of experience helping customers find the perfect piece of jewelry at a price they can afford; whether you’re buying your first engagement ring or trying to find something special as a gift, their expertise will help guide you through every step of the process. From providing helpful tips on how to choose diamonds that fit within your budget range to advising on jewelry care after purchase – there is simply no better source than the professionals at Rare Carat!

What Is Rare Carat’s Gemologist Check?

To ensure that customers are getting exactly what they pay for, all Rare Carats diamonds come with a free gemologist check from their team of experts. This detailed analysis assesses every aspect of the diamond so that buyers know exactly what kind of stone they are getting before making a purchase – whether it be a 5 carat diamond ring or something else entirely! From this report, shoppers can see if there are any visible blemishes or inclusions, as well as how much brilliance and fire each stone has. This ensures full transparency when shopping with them, so customers have complete peace of mind knowing they are buying quality stones at an affordable price point!

Final Thoughts

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To conclude, with its extensive range and easy accessibility – it has never been easier for consumers across the USA who are looking to buy a diamond to find and compare the perfect stone for them with certainty and confidence.

What’s more, by using Rare Carat as America’s #1 source of unbiased advice – buyers can rest assured that their purchase is secure, thanks to its strict quality checks on GIA-certified diamonds! With an impressive 4.9/5 reviews both in Google Business Profile as well as Trustpilot – customers are guaranteed satisfaction when it comes to choosing their perfect diamond at Rare Carat.

What is the mindset of straight men who like older women? Conventional wisdom states that men tend to prefer women younger than them, so it can be surprising to see young men chase after older women. Conventional wisdom is wrong, however, and these relationships are very common.

According to research, this number could be as high as 60%. In fact, every teenage boy can tell you about the female professor they had a crush on. To show you how common it is, below is a list of celebrity couples where the man is dating a woman who is older than him:

• Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas: 10-year age gap
• Lisa Bonet and Jason Momoa: 11-year age gap
• Shakira and Gerard Piqué: 10-year age gap
• Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles: 10-year age gap
• Kim Kardashian and Pete Davidson: 13-year age gap

Now that we know that such men do exist, I am sure that you are curious to understand more about how these men think, feel, and act. By the end of the article, you will learn the following things:

• Why do men find older women appealing?
• Is sex with older women better?
• What kind of man is attracted to an older woman?
• Can relationships succeed when the woman is older than the man?

Psychology Reveals 7 Traits Of Men Who Like Older Women

So why would a man like an older woman? “Older women know who they are and that makes them more beautiful than the younger ones. I like to see a face with some character. I want to see lines. I want to see wrinkles,” says the actor, Naveen Andrews.

Due to the way some men talk about women, you would not be wrong to assume that most men prefer dating women who are younger than them. Yet quite a few men seem to find older women appealing. As such, you may wonder what traits such men possess which cause them to ignore outdated conventions and follow their hearts. Here are the 7 common characteristics typically found amongst such men. By the end of this list, we can guarantee that you will see why older women dating younger men makes a lot more sense than you previously thought.

1. Younger men who date older women have high libidos

If you have ever wondered why men are sexually attracted to older women, one of the reasons is that these men tend to have a high sex drive. These men also have a wider range of sexual fantasies and kinks that they would like to try. So they prefer to have sex with older women as they tend to be more experienced, open, and versatile in matters of the bedroom.

Younger men who have less experience actively seek out older women for this very reason. They believe that a woman with more experience would be more likely to indulge their fantasies and even teach them a useful trick or two. Studies have shown that older women tend to be better at sex than their younger counterparts.

Related Reading: 16 Ways To Show Affection To Your Partner

2. Such men are inclined toward maturity and competence

Another common trait amongst men who like older women is that they seem to prefer emotionally mature women. Studies like this show how and why men and women are attracted to maturity, and it is no surprise that maturity comes with age. Men seek partners who have experienced life more than them, and their competence on the personal and professional front attracts them too.

As such, they believe that dating an older woman would increase their chances of finding such a partner. There are many reasons that a younger man might be attracted to an emotionally mature older woman:

• A mature woman knows what she wants to do with her life and isn’t as anxious
• There is less relationship drama born out of jealousy
• They are more dependable and competent in their day-to-day lives
• A mature woman can teach him a few things about the world

3. Some younger men are interested in a stable life

Why would a man like an older woman? Well, studies indicate that one reason would be that these men are more interested in a stable, homely, and family-centric relationship. These men are not really interested in casual dating or living life one day at a time. They are looking for a serious relationship, one in which they and their partner can focus on growing their lives together.

Men who adore older women are looking to set down roots and build a home. Such men tend to focus more on creating and maintaining a happy family. They believe that an older woman has a higher chance of feeling the same way they do.

4. Men who like older women are supportive and secure about their masculinity

As surprising as it may sound, research indicates that men who find older women appealing are far more supportive of the women’s actions and goals and are not afraid to flip the traditional gender roles. These men are usually mature enough to be aware of the fact that they are dating individuals who have their own likes, interests, goals, and ambitions. They do not view their partner as someone who exists solely to fulfill their needs.

When it comes to dating older women, men understand that their partner has been working toward achieving her goals for a long time. They even understand that their partners may be more knowledgeable than them. These secure men have absolutely no issues in trusting their partner’s judgment and do their best to be supportive.

5. They have higher degrees of introversion

It can be said that men with higher degrees of introversion are more likely to date older women. You may be confused as to why an introverted man would be attracted to an older woman, and it is actually quite obvious once you understand how an introvert thinks. A study shares a few traits of an introvert and what they like:

• Introverts prefer personal and deep conversations topics
• They do not like large and boisterous affairs like clubs
• They prefer a quiet night in
• They have a low threshold for tolerating drama

If you have been paying attention to this article, the reasons that introverts like older women should be clear by now. All of these are traits that an older woman might possess.

Related Reading: The 5 Types Of Love Languages And How To Use Them For Happy Relationships

6. Younger men who date older women are open-minded

It might be surprising to hear, but research indicates that men who are sexually attracted to older women are far more open-minded than general society. It is no secret that dating an older woman is seen as a taboo in most cultures. Older women dating younger men are insultingly referred to as ‘cougars’, and are often shamed for not dating men older than them. Men who are attracted to older women find this line of thinking archaic, misogynistic, and repulsive.

Men who like older women are called ‘cubs’, and quite frankly they do not care about these labels. These men tend to be open-minded enough to not care how society would view their affections and focus all their romantic energy toward their partner regardless of the stigma.

7. Such men are low on self-esteem and are seeking validation

Another reason that men like dating older women may be the simplest of them all. They feel a sense of accomplishment when they are able to attract an older woman. Studies have found that men tend to feel better about themselves when an older woman shows them all the female body language signs of attraction. Psychologist Milaine Alarie famously said, “They’re the ones chasing the cougar.”

Now this is not to say that every man who dates an older woman is looking for an ego boost. In fact, as we can see above, there are quite a few who date them without getting their ego and societal norms involved.

By now, it should be very clear why some men would be attracted to older women. Hopefully, this article has helped you understand such men better by providing some insights into their personalities. You might even read this and think that such men possess the perfect characteristics for you to consider dating them.

However, every person is unique. So, not all young men who are attracted to older women would possess each and every single one of these traits. It is quite normal, and common, for younger men to like older women. Chances are, if you’re a woman who knows a few younger men, there is a possibility that one of them is attracted to you already.

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You may have noticed that the term “bisexuality” is often thrown around but many people are still not clear on what exactly bisexuality or being bisexual means. Since everyone experiences and defines their own sexuality in unique ways, there is no definitive answer to this question. In this article, we will explore some key signs of female bisexuality to help you gain some insight into what this sexuality entails.

The most common and preferred definition of bisexuality is when a person is attracted to more than one gender. Sometimes it can be difficult to tell if you are actually interested in more than one gender or if this is just that college experiment phase everyone talked about.

If you can relate to multiple signs from this list, you can proudly say, “I am bi.” Here are 18 signs that you could be a bisexual female, touching upon your experience in aspects like attraction, relationships, sexual conduct, and more.

What Is Bisexuality?

Multiple-gender attraction is what bisexuality is all about. People who identify as bisexual are attracted to people of more than one gender, sexually or romantically. In a more accurate sense, people who identify as bisexual may be attracted to people of the same gender and opposite gender, or multiple genders.

The bisexual community is a diverse group and this description only provides a foundation for their sexual identity. Different people have different perceptions of how they are sexually inclined. Some may be more attracted to one gender than the other, while some may be equally drawn to more than one gender. Also, whether a bi individual is in a heterosexual or a queer (same-sex) relationship, their identity remains bisexual. If you often find yourself googling “How do I know if I am bisexual?” or if you can’t stop yourself for searching “best bisexual/lesbian dating apps“, then this is the perfect article for you.

Am I Bisexual? 18 Signs That Suggest So

Just like heterosexuality, bisexuality is not something to be medically “diagnosed”. Bi people’s sexual inclinations may change throughout their life. They might, therefore, express bisexuality later in life even if they identify as straight at an early age. Until a woman freely accepts her sexuality, it is impossible to determine whether she is bisexual person. To draw any conclusions, we can only look for indicators of bisexuality in females. In the end, deciding one’s sexual inclination is entirely up to the individual. If you often google questions like “Am I bisexual or a lesbian?”, “Am I bisexual or pansexual?” or “why am I attracted to another woman?”, then this is just the right article for you.

Related Reading: What Makes Her A Woman?

If you’re a bi girl yourself, then you might be able to relate to many of these bisexual signs. It can be difficult to tell if someone is actually interested in other women or if it’s just a phase for them. However, if you notice multiple signs of female bisexuality from this list, then it’s likely that you are indeed bisexual.

1. Fantasizing about people of the same sex

Since everyone experiences and defines their attractions differently, there is no definitive parameter here as well. However, it’s a clear sign that you might be bisexual if you find yourself having sexual feelings and fantasies about more than one gender.

It’s important to keep in mind that not all bisexual people are equally attracted to any two or more genders; some may find their feelings for one gender to be stronger than the other or to change over time. However, it’s a solid indication that you fall somewhere on the bisexual spectrum if you frequently fantasize about men, women, or some nonbinary people in a sexual sense.

2. You can relate to other bisexual women’s experiences

You may have done some research and found that the experiences of other bisexual ladies make a lot of sense. You understand what they’re saying and seeing them live their life authentically, you can relate to some of their personal experiences shared about queer romance. Even just hearing about it from others may help you feel more seen, heard, and understood. Additionally, it might aid in normalizing your romantic or sexual attraction, and your experiences, and make you realize that you’re a little gay yourself.

3. You experience mental health issues due to queerphobia or biphobia

Bisexual people, like all LGBTQIA+ people, face discrimination and stigma that can take a toll on their mental health. Struggling with depression, anxiety, or other mental health issues because of queerphobia/biphobia or due to your confusion/non-acceptance of your sexuality is one of the many signs of female bisexuality.

Related Reading: 10 Ways The Queerphobia Is Coming From Inside The House

4. You’ve thought about using LGBTQIA+ or queer-inclusive dating apps

These days, almost all dating apps include various filters that let you specify the type of person you’re hoping to connect with. You may have previously looked through other genders on dating apps. You are curious and want to check out people of the same sex or those who identify as non-binary. Maybe the thought of going on a date with that cute girl with a pixie haircut gives you butterflies.

This sense of curiosity and excitement can indicate a bisexual identity. Feeling more at comfort using LGBTQ dating apps than apps that only feature heterosexual settings should indicate that your heart longs to be free to pick anyone you desire, regardless of their gender.

5. You don’t conform to gender expectations/norms

There’s a good possibility you’re bisexual if you’ve always felt a little bit different from what society expects you to be based on your gender. Although it’s not a given, many bisexual people don’t fully identify with what their gender role “should” be. Furthermore, a significant portion of the LGBTQ+ population does not identify with traditional gender identities and norms. Many bisexual people are also drawn to others who question gender norms the same way as they do.

6. You are comfortable with the label

If upon learning the phrases “bisexual”, “bi” or same-sex relationship, you experienced an inexplicable resonance, it may be a positive sign that you are bisexual. Occasionally, labels can be advantageous. Because it gives you a sense of belonging when you’ve finally discovered a group of people with whom you connect and who understand what you’re going through. Or, the label might initially fit like a new pair of shoes – your size but needs to be broken in. So go ahead and say, “I am Bi”, with pride!

7. You’re broadening your taste in porn

Okay, so porn may not really count because you could be really into one type of porn but not enjoy it in real life. However, through some ethical investigations, porn has assisted many people in awakening or even understanding their sexuality. Specifically, erotica and porn that features the same or other genders you could find attractive. Think about the phrases, actions, and scenes that you feel attracted to and that turn you on. That’s one way to gauge your romantic or sexual attraction.

Related Reading: How Has The Perception Of Sex Changed In The Last 40 Years?

8. Having a romantic interest in similar and different genders

You find members of different gender identities attractive and could potentially see yourself in a romantic relationship with them. This is one of the key signs of female bisexuality. There are so many different types of attraction we all feel as humans but what is the difference between them?

Romantic attraction is more about developing a connection and feeling of attachment, frequently based on comparable interests, values, and worldviews. These factors may strengthen the relationship. While sexual attraction typically stems from a desire to engage in sexual activity, romantic attraction extends beyond sexual activities.

9. You continue to answer “Am I Bi?” quizzes

Have numerous “Am I Bisexual?” quizzes or questionnaires been saved in your browser history because of your confusion? As it turns out, those who doubt their sexuality frequently come to the realization that the answer is almost always “yes.” And if you consistently receive the response “you have a high likelihood of being bisexual” from such quizzes, there’s a considerable chance you actually are.

Now you may dismiss it as a meaningless quiz or offer arguments as to why that isn’t truly the case, but many LGBTQ+ people have to go through such intense questioning to accept their sexuality. Accepting your bisexuality is necessary for you to live a life full of love and peace.

10. Being open to exploring your sexuality

As you interact with more LGBTQIA+ people, you might feel more secure and at ease with your sexuality. You can do this in a variety of ways, such as by trying out different types of pornography, using sex toys, or even just by talking to a reliable partner about your wants.

According to research, many women come to terms with their sexuality as they become older, and that’s because they gain more experience by meeting and interacting with queer people.

11. You’re erotically charged by same-sex PDA

Bisexual women are frequently drawn to physical displays of affection between partners of the same sex. You may find it tempting or hot to witness two women kiss or exhibit other forms of physical intimacy because it stimulates your sexual desire. Given that bisexuality is primarily characterized by an attraction to more than one gender, it makes sense that you would feel sexually attracted by PDA from any gender.

Related Reading: 10 Famous Celebrity Same Sex (Gay) Couples

12. You’re more likely to experiment sexually

With time, more women are experimenting and exploring their bisexuality, according to a survey by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Your willingness to open up to new sexual experiences is one of the signs of female bisexuality.

According to the survey, 11.5% of women between the ages of 18 and 44 reported having at least one sexual encounter with another woman throughout their lives, compared to the 4% of women between the ages of 18 and 59 who reported the same in a survey of a similar nature a decade earlier. However, not everyone who experiments is bisexual, but these experiences do increase the likelihood of realizing and accepting female bisexuality.

13. You have a few crushes on celebrities

Perhaps you find yourself romantically/sexually connected to both the male and female protagonists when you are watching a romantic movie with heterosexual romance. Alternatively, perhaps you’re drawn to characters who transcend stereotypes and traditional gender roles. All of that contributes to the appeal of female bisexuality. You are not constrained to a single gender. You enjoy many forms of beauty.

14. You feel awkward with your female friends sometimes

This one’s not on you. Due to homophobia and biphobia, bisexuals often feel hesitant in expressing intimacy toward their same-gender friends, even when it’s usually platonic. People’s perception of your sexual orientation should not make you feel ashamed or conflicted about your friendship with a person. Cishet men and women can be friends, and queer women can be friends with other women as well.

Talk to other bisexual individuals or seek out resources to help you better understand your feelings. Ultimately, it is important to remember that your emotional intimacy with your female friends is valid and should be celebrated, regardless of your sexual orientation.

15. You experience a crush on more than one gender

You may not always have a crush on someone of the opposite gender. It might be a celebrity or someone you met at the grocery store, at work, in school, or just generally. This feeling may be a sign if it appears without regard to gender. You can also have moments where you feel attraction to multiple genders. If you’re unsure whether you’re bisexual, consider the person you currently have a crush on. Keep recording episodes of such crushes in your brain to finally draw your conclusion about your sexuality.

Related Reading: What Does It Mean When You Dream About Your Crush?

16. You can’t help but consider it

Have you ever caught yourself thinking about your crush on someone of the same gender? The presence of such persistent ideas may indicate bisexuality in females. If your mind keeps repeating “Am I bisexual?” on a loop, then chances are that you are indeed bisexual.

17. You prefer to hang out in spaces that are welcoming to LGBTQIA+ identities

You naturally want to hang out in environments that are judgment-free and bi-friendly. It not only gives you a sense of security but also creates the perfect atmosphere for you to shine and be who you really are. It may be a sign that you are bisexual if you find yourself drawn to these places or discover that you have unintentionally surrounded yourself with people who have different sexual and romantic orientations.

18. You see yourself ending up with someone of either sex

If you’re bisexual, you will find yourself connecting with more than one gender, and that will lead to the thought of ending up with a person of either sex. Being in a long-term relationship with someone of the same gender may sound like your ultimate goal. Maybe someday watching movies with both different and same-gender characters ending up together will make you long for a similar love tale, and that’s when you should know that you’re bi.

Am I Bisexual Quiz

In the modern era, where meeting lots of individuals is easy and accessible, sexual preferences are being spoken about by like-minded people more openly and honestly. One must be extremely self-reflective and non-judgmental when discussing sexual identity, which is a critical part of life. Some of the most searched/asked questions about female bisexuality are:

• Am I a lesbian?
• Am I bisexual or a lesbian?
• How to identify with female bisexuality?
• Am I bisexual or pansexual?
• How do I know if I am bisexual?
• What are the bisexual signs I exhibit?

To find out more about yourself, take our incredibly self-reflective “Am I Bisexual?” quiz:

• Have you ever been attracted to both the female and the male lead of a movie? Yes/No
• Have you ever watched WLW (women-loving-women) porn videos in the past? Yes/No
• Have you ever tried your luck with women? Yes/No
• Do you fantasize about people of more than one gender regularly? Yes/No
• Do you fantasize about the female body while self-pleasuring? Yes/No
• Have you ever dated women in the past? Yes/No
• Have you kissed people of more than one gender in the past and enjoyed it? Yes/No
• Have you ever been attracted to a female friend before? Yes/No
• Do you enjoy advances by people of multiple genders? Yes/No
• Have you ever fantasized about dating a woman in the past? Yes/No
• Do you keep thinking that you might be bi? Yes/No

Done with the quiz? Here are some quick insights to help you analyze the results:

• If you have more than 6 YES answers, then you are most probably a Bisexual woman
• If your score is 50-50, i.e., half of the answers out of the twelve questions are yes, then you’re still back and forth with your sexuality, and it’s perfectly normal
• If you have more than 6 NO answers, then you are either straight or simply bicurious.

Regardless of the outcome of the quiz, it is essential to take all the time you need to figure out your preferences. Nobody can decide this for you, but yourself.

Coming to terms with your sexuality

Coming to terms with one’s sexuality can be a protracted and challenging process for many people. This road may be considerably more challenging for bisexuals. Bisexuals may find it challenging to feel secure and confident in their own identities because bisexuality is frequently misunderstood and inaccurately portrayed.

However, it’s crucial to keep in mind that there is no one “correct” method for accepting your sexuality. No two people’s journeys are alike, and there is no wrong way to approach them. The most crucial thing is that you arrive somewhere where you feel at ease and content with who you are. You are not alone if you’re currently going through the process of coming out of the closet. You can also take the support of queer-inclusive therapists.

Some of the most famous and trusted LGBTQ+ support groups include Umang for LBT, Nazariya, and Harmless Hugs. Their links are provided below:-

Sexuality is a sensitive topic, and sexual tastes differ from person to person. Don’t let a quiz or list of indicators of bisexuality define who you are since only YOU have the power to make that decision. You might be bisexual if any of these 18 indicators applied to you. Keep in mind that being bisexual is lovely and that despite what society frequently tells us, it’s cool to be unique and express your authentic self. We hope you found this article helpful to pinpoint signs of female bisexuality!

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How soon is too soon to sleep with someone?

I wish there were an easy answer, but this is definitely one question that isn’t “one size fits all.” In today’s brand-new video, I show you how to explore what that looks like for YOU so you’ll be ready to act (or not act) the next time you’re in that situation.



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Matthew:

This month I had a question from one of my LoveLife Club members who asked whether it was advisable to sleep with a guy after a second date. Now, she did also caveat this by saying, “I am coming off the back of two years in a friends-with-benefits situation that I don’t want to repeat.” So here’s what I hear in this. I hear someone who has slipped into a dynamic with someone where she’s sleeping with him regularly or every time they see each other at least, but it’s not progressing and that’s probably a dynamic that she ignored very early on in that situation. And I also hear someone who is looking for something serious in her life. She wants a real relationship where she can be intentional.

Now, I think sometimes the argument of “Can you sleep with someone on a first date or a second date?” quickly becomes this almost political, gendered thing that becomes quite a misnomer. Hopefully, all of us here in this particular space can agree that it doesn’t matter from the point of view of “Can you? Is it okay to?” whether you sleep with someone after one drink or six months? I don’t have an opinion on that other than of course it’s okay. The question is, “Does it serve you and does it serve the path that you want to be on?”

Now, I just said that what I picked up from this question is that this person is being intentional about wanting to find a relationship. So what we have to do then is ask ourselves, “Is what I’m doing the behavior of someone who is being intentional? Does that communicate to someone else and to myself that I’m being intentional?”

I recently was in my local coffee shop and there was a guy in there in his mid-20s, really lovely guy who recognized me and started speaking to me. He started telling me about this person that he’s dating and how, because he really likes her, even though inside there’s all these feelings he has about this person and I’m paraphrasing what he said to me here, but he essentially said, “I might want to scream, ‘I love you, be with me forever.”” But given that he really likes this person, he was evolved enough to say, “I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to do that. Instead, I’m going to go at an organic pace with this person to see what it could actually be.”

Now, that brings up an interesting distinction, doesn’t it? There’s what we feel like doing and there’s the behavior that actually serves us in our intentions. For him his intention was to have a relationship with this woman that he was seeing. So suddenly telling her, “I love you, and oh my God, I just want to be with you all the time,” and doing all of these things. If it communicates an intensity that would no longer feel organic might it might actually disrupt this thing that they have together. It might not if you get two really intense people together and they love saying all these things to each other, then it can be quite fun. But it can also lead to an inorganic pace.

What is a love bomber? When we talk about love bombing and the danger of love bombers and some of you have been in a situation where you feel like you’ve met a love bomber, someone who showered you with praise and grandiosity and statements about the future and about how into you they were and they’ve never felt like this before and drop everything and take a trip with me. The love bomber is really someone who has minimum intentions disguised as maximum intentions because all of that grandiosity seems like all the intention in the world, but actually there’s very little substance behind it. The love bomber is just indulging their feelings without any regard for the consequences of how that might feel to somebody else or how much it might hurt them when they’re not able to back it up. It has no regard for, are we at the same level here? Do we have the same intentions here?

I actually believe that you can look at sex through the same lens of intentionality. You may have someone that you’ve been on a couple of dates with and you feel really excited about this person and from a sexual perspective you feel really turned on by this person. So the combination of, “I like you, I feel connected to you and I am sexually really drawn to you and I’m horny.” That combination of things at the end of a second date might have you saying to yourself, “What I feel like doing is going home with this person.” So your feelings are telling you, “Yeah, absolutely go do that thing.” And there’ll be some people that say, “If it feels good, do it.” But we know we don’t apply that to everything in life. It would be really bad if we said, “If it feels good to punch that person who’s just wound you up in the coffee shop, do it.” We don’t say that about that thing, so we should be careful of just applying that to romance. People do that with romance, don’t they? “If it feels good, just do it. Just enjoy yourself.”

But we have to ask ourselves, what serves the path I want to be on? If I’ve been on two dates with someone and I like this person and I want to see where it could go, then actually the most important thing on my mind right now is not jumping into bed with them. The most important thing on my mind is, “Is there actually some compatibility between me and this person? Does this person have the same intentions as me in terms of what they’re looking for in their life right now? Are they on a similar path? Are we in alignment in what the two of us are looking for in life or the way that we think?” And if we start to bring compatibility forward and we recognize that, “Okay, by the way, it’s a great thing that I’m attracted to this person that’s really wonderful,” but that ultimately is not going to be the deciding factor in whether this works. It’s, “Is there a level of compatibility that I can find with this person?”

And if I show that person that I like that what’s more important to me than rushing to go home with them is to get to know each other on a compatibility level and to assess whether we’re on the same page about what we’re looking for, then I’m communicating my intentionality. I’m actually making that clear to someone. And if I’m making clear my intentionality, then there’s a much higher chance that that person will take me seriously. I want to be clear about this because I don’t want anyone watching this video to think that this is coming from a prude or this is coming from someone who’s got some tilt in a religious direction of waiting or I don’t have any of that. I totally understand the urge to rush home with someone because you are attracted to them, and this isn’t some sort of prudish, “No, you should wait because you shouldn’t give that up to somebody too soon.”

It’s more me saying, when we’re at a stage of our life where we know that the game isn’t, let me just get my short-term needs met, the game is let me actually see if I can find a person I can build with. Showing someone that the most important thing to us is not the euphoric high, be it sexual or otherwise of early dating, but instead a sort of honest assessment and pace in regards to what we actually have or don’t have together, that’s the most important thing to me because that’s what I’m looking for. And it should be said that our perspective there, our clarity there can quite quickly be muddied by sex because then we can feel a bit closer to someone than we really are. Then we can have the highs of that that are very distracting and an escape from reality.

We can find ourselves in a situation where all of a sudden there’s strange emotions like this person, if they now don’t call me, I feel used, and that now brings this sort of strange entitlement dynamic into the situation. Instead of just being able to organically see where it’s going, I’m now thinking, if it doesn’t go anywhere, I’m going to feel used or I’m going to feel like there’s something wrong with me. It’s really going to, I’m gonna feel shame that I did that. Those are all more ways that we complicate a situation that we don’t even know is right for us by just acting on our feelings too soon.

So don’t see sex as a special category of things, necessarily. See it the same way you would any other thing that is important to you, your time, your energy, the kind of statements you make to someone, the kind of promises you make. What we feel like doing . . . And we all know what we feel like doing when we’ve had a great date, we feel like marrying them immediately. But what we feel like doing has to be separated from what serves the path we want to be on. If you want to be on a path to a real relationship, to a life of building with somebody, then your ultimate priority right now is not acting on feelings. Your biggest priority is assessing whether you have a viable builder that you should be investing more time in.

If you enjoyed this video and you want to continue the journey with me beyond this video, I have a free tool on my website at YourDatingSolution.com where you can input your dating challenge right now and it will recommend the best of my solutions from the last 10 years to help you with what you are going through. Go check it out at YourDatingSolution.com and I’ll see you over there.

Lots of reasons. Some similar, some unique. Today I’m sharing real texts I’ve received over the past month on some reasons people seek help. If I make a comment, it’s in red. I have not edited any of these comments. Real, real, real!

What potential or new clients wrote me:

1. I believe in utilizing experts for the best outcome…..this will help me reach my objective of being in a committed long-term relationship.
Smart. Totally agree.

2. I am pre interviewing dating agencies for my son
Yes, this lady turned out to be quite lovely and her son is an artist, shy and adorable. He is now dating profusely and coming out of his shell. Thanks, Mom.

3. Just like in anything, you need to acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses. Dating is not something I’m good at, so I need training.

4. If you have some good points to make, this reforming workaholic will listen! I’m sure I can’t be the first reforming workaholic you’ve been consulted by.
Oh, one of my favorites to work with. Goal-oriented and listens. Had good results with this client—meaning a relationship. Yay!

5. I have read your articles and like your positive approach.
Thanks. A negative approach will never, ever work.

6. I have not tried online dating yet after my divorce and several of my friends have had negative experiences with it. I would like help in navigating all the different sites and using proven successful techniques.
Ok, good. Here’s what I need and tell every single client: Do NOT listen to your friends. They are not dating experts. And if they are still single or married, what do they know? Sorry, don’t mean to sound hard-core here, but this one really bugs me. Naysayers stay away.

7. Because I’m not having any luck on my own.

8. I don’t want to make mistakes in setting up an online account by using the wrong photos or not having an ineffective profile. I have never tried online dating before so I know you only get one chance to make a first impression
So true.

9. I was a client of It’s Just Lunch around 2004, and I met some interesting men. It took the work out of dating for me. I tried online dating recently, and it was not successful for me. I need help figuring this out.
Yep, as the founder of It’s Just Lunch, I work the same way at 33000Dates—-a super personal approach but with a much bigger pool of single candidates that I ever had at It’s Just Lunch.

10. It’s time

11. I am 64. I have no idea how to create an effective profile and I have some concerns and fears about online dating that I would like to talk about. I really would like to meet someone though and this seems the way to do that.
Good move. The 2020’s offer lots of options for your age group. Thank God it’s not the 1990’s—it was tough then!

12. Don’t want to waste time

13. To learn since it is a new thing for me – do it right since the beginning and not to lose good opportunities for silly mistakes

14. I’m retired at 51, and there are very few people out there my age in a similar situation. I can travel and do anything—and want someone to share.
Oh, yes, there are people in your situation. We can find them.

15. I am a widow and haven’t a clue how dating works now. Also I’m used to people chasing me…..

16. I suck at this. I don’t vibe with anyone my age. Too much drama and I don’t know how to deal with it.
Hmmm, we can figure this out. Probably wrong site or bad profile. (BTW, we did figure this out!!!)

17. Because I feel like I must be doing something wrong on my profiles. I get a lot of views but almost no responses
Yes, it’s one of 4 things. Boring profile, poor photos, wrong site or ineffective messaging. Messaging must be fun!

18. I always think it is beneficial to consult with experts when you are in need of services that don’t align with your core strengths.

19. I got married very young. I was married 38 years and my husband passed away a little over 2 years ago. I recently realized I don’t want to be alone the rest of my life but I have no idea how to date in 2023! My adult children are very supportive and encouraging me to do this.
You raised great kids!

20. I need a boost because I’m becoming convinced all the good ones between 55-65 yo are taken.
Nope, see it happen every week!

21. Need some help with momentum, time management, how to best manage phone calls and the like.

22. I am obviously out of practice, since I have been married for the last 37 years
Yes. That’s why I’m a firm believer in “off to the races” and in the first 2 weeks having you out on 4 dates. Get comfortable.

Oh wow, there were so many more. Maybe you fall into one of these categories. Maybe not.

But, the best thing to do is to set up a free 15-minute call with me—it will tell us is we are a good fit for each other and I can help. As my clients tell me, I am direct (graciously!) as I want you to have success. So, CLICK HERE and let’s get rocking and rolling with your love life!

Happy Dating,

Andrea McGinty
Dating Consultant/Dating Coach
Founder, It’s Just Lunch and 33000Dates.com
Featured in People, NYT, WSJ, Today Show, CNN, Oprah and lots more
702-494-7344 (you can text me directly to set up a time for our call)

#dating #datingexpert #datingtips

#datingcoach #datingprofile #writeadatingprofile #datingonline #onlinedating

Having a crush is an exhilarating feeling but with it comes an inevitable dose of fear. The fear of rejection or of being cringey in front of them is enough to leave you too paralyzed to take that first step. To talk with your crush for the first time in this state of mind can feel like rocket science. That’s why we came up with this list of tips and tricks on how to talk with your crush without making a fool out of yourself.

How To Talk With Your Crush Without Being Awkward And Nail It

While a little shyness isn’t all bad (it can actually come across as cute or charming), your nerves might push you into the realm of painful awkwardness, leading to a situation that will keep you up at night for months or years to come. Before you throw caution to the wind, have a look at these tips on how to talk with your crush and see if they work for you.

But before you make your move, it would help to keep a few things in mind:

• Don’t overthink things. This is a surefire way to panic town
• Have a few topics prepared to avoid awkward silences
• Groom yourself. Nobody wants to flirt with someone who looks like they just rolled out of bed! In fact, research has shown that not only is this good for your first impression ‘visually,’ but also positively impacts your mood, which your crush will pick up on

Additionally, the first few minutes you spend with your crush will likely make or break your chances of taking things forward with them. Researchers have found that 95% of people believe that first impressions are important. This means that your crush is very likely to make a decision about you based on your first impression.

Related Reading: How To Know If You Have A Crush On Someone – 17 Sure-Shot Signs

How to talk with your crush over text

Texting is a great way to initiate a conversation with your crush since it provides some protection from the debilitating effects of a faux pas. But even with texting, initiating a conversation that you’re so invested in can feel like an uphill battle.

Our instinct is often to start with a generic “Hey…” or “How’s it going?” But this is counterproductive because it doesn’t give your crush any incentive to answer. It’s too casual and vague, and communicates a lack of interest on your part. If you want to talk to your crush on Whatsapp, try some of these ideas to protect yourself from being left on read:

• Ask a leading question: A question that they will feel compelled to answer. For example, if you share an interest in a certain musical act, you could ask them if they heard their latest release. Or if you share a similar taste in food, you could ask if they’ve tried a certain restaurant. The latter even works as a great segue into asking them out on a date
• Reference a past interaction: If you’ve already interacted with your crush, a great way to initiate a text conversation with them is to bring up something that the two of you have already spoken about. For instance, if they recommended a movie, you could say something like, “Hey, what was that movie you were telling me about the other day?”
• Add a compliment to your leading text: A genuine compliment rarely fails since it has the power to make someone’s day. Flattering your crush AND getting them to respond is a double win. You could say something like, “I just heard the funniest joke and it reminded me of you!” This statement works by complimenting them on their sense of humor while creating curiosity about the joke. Needless to say, be prepared with a good joke!
• Point out a shared interest: If you know they are into something that you are too, you could open a conversation by pointing this out. For example, if you like going to concerts, you could say, “Omg, you like this artist too? They have a gig this weekend, we should totally go!”
• Don’t be too quick to reply to their texts: While this may seem counterintuitive – the idea is to let your crush know that you’re interested – the fact is that always texting back immediately can come across as needy. Studies have shown that it may be wiser to let a text from your crush sit for some time before you respond

How to talk with your crush in public

To talk with your crush for the first time in person, especially in a public place, is an entirely different ballgame. The rise of social media and dating apps has made us a little too reliant on the safety of texting. So while it has always been a nerve-racking endeavor to talk to your crush in person, it is even more so now. Here are some pointers on how to talk with your crush in public:

• Open with something relevant to the situation: If you’re standing in line at a coffee shop and you ask your crush about their favorite music or movies, they will probably feel thrown off. This is because it is irrelevant. A better conversation starter would be something like, “Is the cappuccino here any good? I haven’t tried it here before.” This will surely get a response and open up the possibility of a smooth conversation
• Say no to pick-up lines: While memes and rom-coms are all about cheesy pick-up lines, these rarely work in real life. Even if it doesn’t make your crush cringe, they will likely only politely chuckle a little bit before moving on with their day. If you really can’t think of a good opener, at least avoid a pick-up line. As a last resort, a simple “Hi” will suffice in a face-to-face scenario
• Avoid hovering: This can happen sometimes when you’re building up the nerve to talk to your crush. But what ends up happening is that you come across as a little creepy, and your crush now wants to be as far away from you as possible. So, make sure to approach their personal space when you’re absolutely ready to strike up a conversation
• Talk to other people first: If you’re at a house party, you could try talking to other people around your crush before you make your move. This helps avoid the above situation. Talking to other people will warm you up and you will come across as sociable and likable to your crush. If they are with their friends, you could strike up a conversation with them, increasing the chances of your crush joining in organically
• Be expressive: Research has shown that people are more receptive to you when you express yourself non-verbally while talking. This includes facial expressions and hand gestures. So don’t be afraid to be a little animated when you talk to your crush. Chances are you’ll make a lasting impression on them if you do

How to start a conversation with your crush in person

When interacting with your crush in person, choosing the right words can feel like a monumental task. Here’s what we recommend:

• Practice with a friend first
• Establish a rule that your friend can only answer your questions and cannot ask you questions in return. This will keep you on your toes and help strengthen your conversational skills
• Probably the hardest thing to deal with in this situation is the perception of judgment from the other person. It is good practice to remind yourself that no one is actually judging you as long as you are respectful in your approach
• So, relax, be yourself, and take romantic rejection as a learning experience instead of an indictment on your personality

Related Reading: Healthy Flirting Vs Unhealthy Flirting – 8 Key Differences

How to talk to your crush on the phone

In this age of texting and DMs, phone calls are practically a thing of the past. Many of us prefer texting over phone calls because it’s less stressful in the early stages when you’re both trying to make a good impression. But at some point, you’re going to have to connect on a call. And when that happens, it can trigger some nerves.

So how do you come across as romantic on the phone with your crush? Here are some steps you can follow:

• The first and most important thing to do even before picking up the phone is to calm your nerves as much as possible
• If you’re the one making the call, that’s great! You can take your time, do some deep breathing or a mindfulness exercise, and then make the call
• If you’re receiving the call, you don’t have to answer immediately. Wait for a second or two, catch your breath, steady your nerves, and then answer the call
• If you find it hard to center yourself so quickly, you can always let it ring out and call them back later with a simple “Sorry, I missed your call. I was caught up with something.”
• On the call, a simple “Hey, how’s it going?” is a great way to start a conversation
• If you’re talking on the phone, it means you’ve already communicated elsewhere, so you don’t need a memorable line to ‘reel them in.’
• Having said that, you can use a one-liner or a corny pickup line ironically but you have to make sure it’s obvious that you’re being silly
• Once you’ve got the conversation going, just be yourself. Talk about common interests, ask non-invasive questions, and share some appropriately personal details about your life
• Make sure to strike a good balance between talking and listening
• And when it’s done, try to end the conversation on a happy note (i.e., avoid ending the conversation with a rant about the state of the world)

Related Reading: How Gen-Z Uses Memes To Flirt

How to start a conversation with your crush on Instagram

Probably the easiest way to start a conversation with your crush on Instagram is to reply to one of their stories. If it doesn’t feel right to say something concrete yet, this allows you to open a line of communication with a simple emoji reaction. It tells them something about you based on the story they shared.

From here, you can ease into more direct approaches like sending them funny texts and memes according to their interests, liking their photos, or even DMing them. Again, keep it light in the beginning and make use of the topics mentioned above to ensure the smoothest possible conversation.

But tread carefully with this approach because it is easy to come across as creepy on Instagram. There is no shortage of actual creeps on social media, so it can be difficult for your crush to distinguish between them and a genuine greeting. You could introduce yourself, say something positive about their content, and ask if you could follow them if it’s a private account.

Related Reading: The Problem With Sliding Into Her DMs: The Plague Of Creepy Texts And Unsolicited Images

Tips to talk to your girl crush

The best way to get over your nerves over talking to your girl crush – is to talk to your girl crush! As soon as the conversation begins and takes a flow, your nerves will subside and you will simply be yourself in conversation with another human being.

Having said that, it doesn’t hurt to be prepared. You don’t want to start a conversation with your girl crush and then freeze like a deer in headlights. Whether you are good at banter or not, it is always a good idea to have a bunch of topics ready to prevent the conversation from drying up into an awkward silence. Here are some ideas on how to talk with your crush:

• Pop culture: Music, movies, and TV shows are a foolproof topic to get a conversation with your girl crush going. “Did you see the latest episode of Euphoria?” “Have you seen the latest Imagine Dragons video?” “Did you catch that new Dakota Johnson movie?”
• Food: Everyone is a foodie. So you can’t really go wrong talking about food. It’s a safe topic in that there’s no risk of accidentally asking something too personal or triggering. And the bonus is that you can remember her favorite food and surprise her with it in the future!
• Travel: Most people love to travel. Sharing travel stories is a great way to keep the conversation going. Even if you haven’t traveled a lot, you can always talk about the places you’ve always dreamed of visiting. This could also work as a subtle hint for future dating ideas
• Shared values: This is a great way to segue into a slightly deeper conversation with your crush. Shared political views, a common social cause, or a similar worldview can bring people together. Just make sure to keep it light in case you don’t agree on a hot button topic!

Tips to talk to your boy crush

When you’re talking to your boy crush, your best bet is always to be yourself. It works logically as well because if you do hit it off with him, you want him to know who you are from the get go, right? Here are some other pointers:

• If you’re afraid of coming across as needy, rest easy because studies have shown that many men find it appealing when a woman makes the first move – especially when he knows you like him
• Make sure that he’s interested in talking to you. A few looks in his general direction with some well-timed eye contact should give you this information pretty quickly. If he returns your gaze a couple of times, it means he’s open to a conversation
• A warm, relaxed smile is a great way to initiate the conversation. It is a flirtatious signal that will make your man warm up to you, resulting in a smooth conversation
• If you’re afraid of looking like you’re forcing a smile, try to relax and think of something that makes you happy
• Besides this, the same conversation starters mentioned above should work on the guy you like. Men are not that different from women
• If you’re being genuine, he will also likely be genuine in his response when he knows you like him; and you can just go with the flow from there

At the end of the day, you’re probably making a bigger deal out of this than it actually is. This is something we all do because we’re human. But you don’t have to let your nerves ruin a good thing, whether you talk to your crush on Whatsapp or in person. Use these tips on how to talk with your crush and put yourself out there!

Courting Vs Dating | How Courtship Is Different Than Dating

21 Tips For Courting A Woman – Being A True Gentleman

10 Reasons He Suddenly Stopped Chasing You – Even When You Wanted Him To

Making a move on a woman you are interested in can be both thrilling and nerve-wracking.

You may feel a rush of excitement as you imagine the possibility of a romantic relationship, but also fear the possibility of rejection or embarrassment.

In this post, I will share tips and advice on how to make a move when you think she’s interested, including how to tell if the timing is right, what to do if you’re afraid of rejection, and how to build up the confidence to take the plunge.

If you enjoy this article and find it valuable, then we can help you get more dating success by investing in one of our courses. For more information, download our Social Attraction Training Course PDF Brochure.

How can I tell if she’s interested in me?

One way to tell if a woman is interested in you is through her body language.

Signs of interest may include prolonged eye contact, physical touch, flirtatious behavior, and engaging in conversation with you. However, it’s important to remember that not all women express their interest in the same way.

Some women may be more reserved in their approach and may not give obvious signs of interest. It’s important to pay attention to her overall behavior and communication to get a sense of whether or not she’s interested.

What’s the best way to make a move?

The best way to make a move will depend on the situation and your personal preferences.

Some people prefer to ask someone out on a date to get to know them better before making a move, while others may feel comfortable leaning in for a kiss or telling the person how they feel.

Regardless of your approach, it’s important to be respectful, confident, and clear in your communication. Avoid pressuring or manipulating the person into reciprocating your feelings, and be prepared to accept their response graciously.

What if I’m afraid of rejection?

Fear of rejection is common and can prevent people from taking the necessary steps to pursue a potential relationship.

However, it’s important to remember that rejection is a normal part of dating and doesn’t define your worth as a person. It’s important to practice self-compassion and remind yourself that even if things don’t work out with one person, there are plenty of other potential partners out there.

Additionally, you can work on building up your confidence through self-care practices like exercise, meditation, or spending time with supportive friends and family.

How do I know if the timing is right to make a move?

Timing is important when making a move. Look for signs that she’s open and receptive, such as positive body language, a relaxed demeanor, and an engaged attitude.

If she seems distracted, uncomfortable, or disinterested, it may not be the best time to make a move. Additionally, consider the context of the situation.

If you’re in a noisy, crowded environment, it may be harder to have a meaningful conversation or make a move. Use your judgement and intuition to assess whether or not the timing feels right.

What if I make a move and it doesn’t work out?

Not every move you make will be successful, and that’s okay.

It’s important to remember that rejection isn’t a reflection of your worth as a person. Be gracious and respectful if she declines your advances, and move on with hope and optimism about meeting someone else.

Remember that there are plenty of other potential partners out there and that rejection is just a part of the dating process.

How do I build up the confidence to make a move?

Confidence comes from within, but you can work on building it up by practicing self-care, reminding yourself of your strengths and accomplishments, and taking small risks to build up your confidence gradually.

Additionally, you can practice visualization techniques to imagine yourself making a successful move and feeling confident and capable.

Remember that confidence is something that can be developed over time and with practice and it starts by taking action towards the goals you would like to achieve in your life.

Should I ask her out in person or over text?

Asking someone out in person is generally more personal and effective, but if that’s not an option, a well-crafted text can work as well.

In general, it’s important to make your intentions clear and respectful in either case. Inviting her to join you on something you are already doing is the best way to gauge whether she is interested in you.

If you’re asking her out over text, be sure to use proper spelling and grammar and avoid being too pushy or try hard. Again just articulate what you are already doing and invite her, if she likes you she will join you.

What if I’m not sure if she’s interested or just being friendly?

It can be challenging to tell the difference between friendly behavior and romantic interest.

If you’re not sure, try asking her out on a casual date to see how she responds. If she seems excited and engaged, that’s a good sign she may be interested.

If she declines or seems hesitant, it’s possible she may not be interested in a romantic relationship at this time. You should move on and let time do you work for you.

How can I build up the courage to make a move?

Building up courage takes practice and perseverance. Start by working on building up your self-confidence and self-esteem through self-care practices like exercise, meditation, or spending time with supportive friends and family.

You can also practice visualization techniques to imagine yourself making a successful move and feeling confident and capable.

Remember that taking risks is a part of the dating process and that every move you make is an opportunity to learn and grow.

Should I be direct or subtle when making a move?

The best approach will depend on your personal style and the situation. Indirect is best when it is through an introduction or friend of a friend and direct is better if you are meeting a woman during the day – check out my daygame article to learn more.

Some people prefer to be direct and clear in their intentions, while others may prefer a more subtle approach. In general, it’s important to be respectful and clear in your communication, whether you’re being direct or subtle.

Avoid playing games or trying to manipulate the person into reciprocating your feelings. If you know you can go and meet other women then you will be more relaxed and self-confident.

How can I tell if she’s not interested and I should move on?

Signs that she may not be interested include avoiding eye contact, seeming distracted or disinterested, or declining invitations to spend time together.

If you’ve tried making a move or expressing your interest and she’s not responding positively, it may be time to move on.

Remember that rejection is a normal part of the dating process and that there are plenty of other potential partners out there.

Is it okay to make a move if we’re coworkers or friends?

Making a move on a coworker or friend can be complicated and should be approached with caution.

Consider the potential consequences of a romantic relationship, including how it may affect your work or friendship.

If you do decide to make a move, be respectful and clear in your communication, and be prepared to accept her response with grace and dignity.

How can I make a move without coming on too strong?

Making a move can be a delicate balance between being assertive and respectful.

Try to gauge her level of interest and respond accordingly. It is always best to invite her to something you are already doing to make it easy for her to join you if she likes you, it also means you do not waste time waiting on a woman as you are ding the activity anyway.

If she seems hesitant or uncomfortable with the invite, take a step back and give her space. Then go and do your activity and have the confidence to meet other women when you are there as this will increase your confidence and dating success.

Should I wait for her to make a move?

While it’s possible that she may make the first move, it’s important not to wait around for someone else to take action.

If you’re interested in someone, take the initiative and express your feelings. Women will offer subtle clues that they like you, however at some point you must face the potential risk of rejection and make a move.

This will show that you’re confident and assertive, which are attractive qualities, if you don’t it shows sings of insecurity and she will lose interest.

How can I handle rejection if I make a move and it doesn’t work out?

Rejection is a normal part of the dating process and can be difficult to handle.

If you make a move and she declines your advances, try to stay positive and avoid taking it personally. Remember that rejection doesn’t define your worth as a person and that there are plenty of other potential partners out there.

Give yourself time to process your feelings and don’t be afraid to seek support from friends, family or my Social Attraction team.

How can I create a romantic atmosphere when making a move?

Creating a romantic atmosphere can help set the tone for a successful move. Consider setting the mood with soft lighting, music, or candles.

This fall more under the category of a seduction and not attracting women. If you want to learn more about seduction then read my how to seduce women article.

Being spontaneous is also one of the best ways that you can create excitement before making a move. When I am training clients we use specific phrases and body language that instantly creates the right atmosphere before a first kiss.

How can I make a move if we’ve been friends for a long time?

Making a move on a long-time friend can be tricky, but it’s important to approach the situation with honesty and respect.

Consider talking to her about your feelings and being open to her response, whether it’s positive or negative.If she doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, then you should learn to express your feelings sooner.

You could also consider investing in one of our course as we can help you to have more confidence and waste less time hoping for dating success.

How can I make a move without being too try hard?

Making a move requires a balance between assertiveness and respectfulness. Avoid being too keen or pushy, and instead focus on building intimacy and trust.

The best way to build trust it to spend time together in a wide variety of different locations and to share childhood stories as these create depth of character and a sense of togetherness.

Gauge her level of interest and respond accordingly, and be prepared to accept her response with grace and dignity.

Summary

In conclusion, making a move when you think she’s interested can be a challenging but rewarding experience. It requires confidence, self-awareness, and respect for the other person’s feelings and boundaries.

However, with the tips and advice we’ve shared in this post, you can feel more equipped to take the next step and pursue the romantic relationship you desire. Remember to listen to your intuition, communicate clearly and respectfully, and be prepared to accept her response with grace and dignity.

Whether your move is successful or not, know that you have taken an important step in your dating journey and that every experience is an opportunity to learn and grow. So go ahead and take the plunge – you never know where it may lead.

Action Steps

If you’re feeling low on confidence and could use some additional support in making a move, I invite you to check out download our Social Attraction Training Course PDF Brochure.

Our courses are designed specifically for men like you who are looking to up their dating game and achieve more success with women.

Our team of experts will provide you with the tools, strategies, and support you need to build up your confidence and pursue the relationships you desire. To learn more, visit our live training page and schedule a consultation today.

Thanks to anime and coming-of-age movies, people love to think they want to find a quiet, shy guy to date. What they don’t understand are the unique challenges of dating someone who is naturally bashful.

These types of men make fantastic partners, but getting them to open up and be comfortable with you can be a challenge.

Today, we are going to look at the 15 best tips for building a loving, trusting relationship with your shy partner.

1. Make it Clear You are Interested in Him

Before you can date a shy guy, you have to let him know you are interested. You may think your subtle flirting is working on him, but think again!

It’s not that he doesn’t recognize your behavior as flirty, he is simply too shy to act on it. In his mind, all he can think about is being wrong and you turning him down!

So, if you are truly interested in him, lay it on thick. In fact, the best option is to just tell him straight up, “I think you are cute and that we should go out sometime.”

2. Learn His Language

Once you are communicating with your shy love interest, you can begin learning how he communicates. Maybe he is too shy to shout his desire for you from the rooftops but he may be more open to writing you a long text message about his feelings.

Take the time to see how he is comfortable communicating and try to meet him at least halfway.

3. Give Him Genuine Compliments

Some men are shy as a symptom of having no self-confidence. It isn’t your job to fix all his issues, but giving him genuine compliments and showing him his worth is a great way to be a loving partner. Over time, he may begin to blossom.

4. Find Some Common Ground

When shy guys are out of their element, they tend to shut down. To remedy this, try finding places to go that you both enjoy. Are you both fans of comic books? Consider asking him to accompany you to a comic store or even a ComicCon-style event. These types of suggestions not only help him to feel comfortable but show him that you know his interests.

5. Don’t Tease Him for Being Shy

The worst thing you can do to a shy person is tease them for being shy. It makes them hyper-aware of their own shortcomings, which results in them being more closed off.

6. Don’t Be Afraid to Make the First Move

If you feel like the moment is right for a first move, take it. This removes the pressure on him to overcome his shyness and do it himself! Once you have broken the barrier of physical intimacy, he will likely be more comfortable making moves in the future.

7. Get Him Talking About His Interests

If you want to get a shy guy talking, bring up some of his interests. Many shy people tend to have hobbies they are passionate about, but don’t often get to discuss.

8. Try Not to Overshadow Him All The Time

Dating a shy guy doesn’t mean dulling your own shine, but remember that it can be easy to feel like you are in the shadows when your partner talks over you or ignores your needs. Take the time to listen to him and include him in conversations.

9. Don’t Pressure Him

If you treat a shy guy well, he will eventually open up to you, but don’t pressure him to get there on your terms. It can take time for shy people to feel comfortable with a new person.

10. Be An Open Book for Him

Your partner may be too shy to ask you questions about your past, family, personality, etc. Try being an open book for him so that he can truly learn who you are and not stand in his own way of getting to know you.

11. Give Him Clear Expectations for Your Relationship

While it is important to understand your shy partner, you shouldn’t have to lower your standards for him. Let him know exactly what you expect out of a relationship. That may be someone who goes with you to work events or is open to taking pictures for Christmas cards. If he knows what you are wanting and doesn’t think he can manage, it gives him the opportunity to walk away before anyone gets hurt.

12. Learn to Notice When He is Flirting With You

Sometimes shy guys aren’t the best flirters. They tend to approach flirting with subtlety and through kind actions.

• Does he try to be where you are at parties or other social events?
• Does he catch your eye from across the room just to smile and look away?
• Does he like every. single. post. on your social media?

These are all ways that shy people flirt. It is all about getting your attention and being near you in the least scary way possible.

13. Compromise On the Types of Dates You Have

Dating a shy person (especially if you are an extrovert) is a game of making compromises. If you want him to step outside of his comfort zone for you and go to parties or clubs, you need to return the favor by having low-key dates he will enjoy.

14. Don’t Take His Shyness Personally

When you are used to being constantly praised or openly flirted with, a shy guy can come across as uninterested. Try not to take his shyness personally. Over time, he will become more comfortable with openly fawning over you.

15. Don’t Break His Trust

If you want a shy guy to learn it is safe to open up to you, you have to respect his privacy. If you run around and share all his secrets with your friends, you are only showing him that he was right to not tell you anything.

21 Sexual Health and Education Resources That Will Blow Your Mind

If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you never got comprehensive sex education.

Why? Because, well, almost no one does — at least not when they’re still young.

In order to really know a wealth of facts about sex, most people have to grow old enough to reach the age of majority — at which point they can access a wealth of resources about sex, anatomy, infections and pleasure that we deny to young people.

But, because there’s no standardized approach there either, it’s easy to be an adult who doesn’t know a ton about sex, or, worse, believes in untrue things and other myths about sex they learned young and never bothered to explore further.

So if you’re someone who realizes they don’t know as much about sex as they could, where do you start? Well, AskMen has a lot of articles about sex for you to peruse, but if you want to explore some personal sex education in other media, that’s valid too. We spoke to a handful of trusted sex experts about which resources they’d recommend (including, at times, their own work or resources they’re affiliated with). Here’s what they had to say:

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Sex Education Websites/Online Courses

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Beducated

“Beducated is a great resource,” says Kayla Lords, co-host of the Loving BDSM podcast. “You can consider it the SkillShare of sex. (Full disclosure: I’ve partnered with them in the past.)”

Beducated’s classes, Lords notes, “cover a broad range of sexual topics, including kink, and are easy to get through, with each lesson being fairly short and sweet.”

Check out Beducated

Luna Matatas

Luna Matatas is a source of “practical, punny and digestible sex ed,” says Jess O’Reilly, sexologist and relationship expert. “She is brilliant, funny and a top-notch sex educator.”

Check out Luna Matatas

Sex Smart Films

Sex Smart Films features footage that’s “educational and real,” says Chelsie Reed, Ph.D., LPC, author of Sexpert: Desire, Passion, Sensations, Intimacy, and Orgasm to Indulge in Your Best Sex Life. It’s “not over-edited or out-of-order,” she notes, and that makes Sex Smart Films a “great place to get answers in a visual way.”

Check out Sex Smart Films

Scarleteen

“Scarleteen is a long-time favorite of mine for general sex education,” says Lords. “It’s one I’ve used myself, to check my understanding of a topic, and a site I’ve recommended for my teenage children to use when they want to learn more.”

Check out Scarleteen

Happier Couples

Happier Couples boasts online courses tackling subjects like “premature ejaculation, mindful sex, oral techniques, communication and more,” says O’Reilly.

Check out HappierCouples.com

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Sex Education Books

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Becoming Cliterate by Laurie Mintz

Becoming Cliterate, says SKYN Condoms’ sex and intimacy expert and author Gigi Engle, teaches readers “about desire, both male and female, and gives special attention to the clitoris — which is lacking massively in modern education.”

It’s a great read if you, like so many men who sleep with women, are still over-focused on penetrative sex and want to start exploring other ways of pleasuring your partner(s).

$16.99 at Amazon.com

Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski

Engle says Come as You Are provides “practical information related sex and sexuality that we don’t often get from parents and (basically never) in school,” and, like Becoming Cliterate, is a fantastic resource for expanding your mind with regards to non-penetrative sex.

$29.25 at Amazon.com

Tongue-Tied by Stella Harris

This is “a book I recommend to anyone and everything who struggles to communicate about sexual desires and kinks,” says Lords. “I’ve read it multiple times, and it’s a great resource for anyone who’s trying to both figure out their own desires and then share those desires with a partner.”

$21.85 at Amazon.com

The Ultimate Guide to Seduction and Foreplay by Jessica O’Reilly & Marla Renee Stewart

“This is a sexual communication and erotic theory handbook that goes far beyond seduction into topics of personal values, boosting confidence and exploring new techniques,” says O’Reilly.

$24.95 at Amazon.com

Playing Well With Others by Lee Harrington

Playing Well with Others, which O’Reilly recommends, is subtitled “Your Field Guide to Discovering, Exploring and Navigating the Kink, Leather and BDSM Communities,” which gives you a strong sense of what it brings to the table — it’s a great read if your tastes lean more kinky than vanilla.

$19.95 at Amazon.com

Pleasure Activism by Adrienne Maree Brown

Adrienne Maree Brown has gotten much acclaim in recent years for her work as a writer and activist. O’Reilly recommends her essay collection Pleasure Activism, which explores, among other things, the political nature of sex and pleasure.

$17.99 at Amazon.com

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Sex Education Podcasts

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F*cks Given

Sex education is more than just fact-sheets and anatomy diagrams — there’s also the human, emotional side; how we experience our sex lives. F*cks Given and its sister podcast, Come Curious, “are more of a personal journal of the two hosts, which is very interesting,” says Engle.

Check out F*cks Given

The Sex With Dr. Jess Podcast

“Our podcast isn’t just about sex,” says O’Reilly. “It’s about all the topics that intersect with pleasure and relationships. We discuss everything from interracial relationships and emotional literacy to communication skills for bigger, better orgasms, orgies and anal pleasure.”

Check out the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast

In Touch With Ruby Rare

“In Touch With Ruby Rare is a wonderful, well-made look at lots of different aspects of sexuality,” says Engle. She notes that it covers everything “from porn, to nakedness, to our bodies, to the education we did and didn’t receive.”

Check out In Touch With Ruby Rare

Royal Fetish Radio with Jasmine and King

O’Reilly recommends this podcast starring sex educators Jet Setting Jasmine and King Noire, which touches on things like porn, kink, sex work and giving one’s kids “the talk.”

Check out Royal Fetish Radio with Jasmine and King

Sex and Psychology

Curious about the interaction between the brain and desire? “Sex and Psychology brings in experts — mostly doctors and psychologists — from all around the world to focus specifically on the psychology of sex in different avenues,” Engle says.

Check out Sex and Psychology

Savage Lovecast

Dan Savage is a giant in the field of sex advice thanks to his long-running advice column in The Stranger, “Savage Love.” Whether you’re familiar with his name or not, Engle recommends checking out his podcast, where he answers listener questions on all manner of thorny sexual subjects.

Check out Savage Lovecast

Naughtylicious

O’Reilly also suggests Carli de Ville’s podcast, Naughtylicious. It boasts scandalous stories from real-life sex workers, as well as deep dives on kinks and fetishes even other sex podcasts are too vanilla to touch.

Check out Naughtylicious

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Assorted Sex Education Resources

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Sex Down South

Ever been to a sex conference? No, it’s not an orgy. “This is the conference of the year for academics and enthusiasts alike,” says O’Reilly. (Of course, given it takes place at a hotel, it’s fair to assume that group sex isn’t totally out of the question.)

Check out Sex Down South

SLAM

Hungry for more sex conferences? Look no further than SLAM, another suggestion of O’Reilly’s. A BIPOC-run conference, it aims to be inclusive and accessible in ways many conferences fall short of.

Check out the SLAM Conference

Sex Education

You may have already heard of this one, but if you haven’t watched any, it is worth checking out. The Netflix show Sex Education, Reed says, is both funny and a good source of accurate sex information. Which means that, well, it lives up to its title!

Check out Sex Education

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Are you tired of using dating apps that only focus on finding the perfect match? Do you wish there was an app that could help you enhance your existing relationship and make it stronger? Look no further than Ry, the ultimate relationship app.

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When I decided to become an OB-GYN, I knew I would be an abortion provider, but I didn’t know that I would someday own an abortion clinic in a state where Republican legislators passed nearly 40 restrictions on abortion over the past decade and a half.

The first broad sweeping restrictions on abortion were signed into law in 2009, the year I arrived in Arizona. I have not known an Arizona without abortion restrictions. Currently, I provide abortion care up to 15 weeks of pregnancy because of a legal decision stating that I cannot be prosecuted for performing abortions in compliance with one of two conflicting laws in effect simultaneously in Arizona.

In 2013, I founded Desert Star Family Planning in Phoenix to combat the stigma that surrounds reproductive health care and bring services to ethnically diverse, medically underserved, and economically depressed communities in Arizona. Desert Star opened during a time when abortion access in the state was shrinking rapidly, as law after law restricting abortion was passed year after year. Despite these restrictions, we had Roe v. Wade as the legal floor in the country and it allowed Arizonans to have access to abortion. In fact, advocates were unsuccessful in challenging an 1864 law criminalizing abortion in 1972.

Under Roe, that 19th century abortion ban was deemed unenforceable, but never repealed. Now the floor has fallen out from beneath us after the Supreme Court decision in June overturned Roe. The decision, combined with the web of laws anti-abortion politicians passed—including the 1864 law that was still on the books—created chaos and confusion about whether abortion was legal in the state that changed on a daily basis.

These restrictions are not only medically unnecessary and harmful to abortion seekers, they also detrimentally impact the operations of independent clinics like mine. Year after year, these restrictions have chipped away at our capacity to provide care. My patients, many of whom see me as their doctor for additional care beyond abortion services—like gender affirming hormone therapy, well woman exams, and birth control—are at risk of losing access to the doctor they have come to know and trust as I struggle to keep my clinic open under extremely challenging conditions.

That is the goal of all of these restrictions and bans: to close clinics and to make abortion inaccessible.

Anti-abortion politicians have always taken advantage of the complicated feelings some people have about abortion and seized this moment after the fall of Roe to stoke an already complex and hostile legal environment for abortion in Arizona. Yet we cannot express enough who the people disproportionately impacted by abortion restrictions are: Black, Latinx, Asian American, Native Hawaiian, Pacific Islander, and Indigenous people; those working to make ends meet; the LGBTQ community; immigrants; young people; folks living in rural communities; people with disabilities, and other historically oppressed communities. These are my patients.

I agree with Gov. Katie Hobbs when she said in her State of the State address in January that “ensuring a strong, safe future for Arizona means defending the freedoms of all its residents.”

As a physician, patient advocate, and community member, I call on Arizonans to reject anti-abortion rhetoric, lean into empathy, and acknowledge our shared humanity. You already know and love someone who has had an abortion. In the United States, 1 in 4 people who can become pregnant will have an abortion by the age of 45. We need to fight for all of our freedoms so we can all thrive, not just survive. We want opportunity. We want to provide for the children we already have. Abortion is health care, and affordable, unrestricted access to abortion care is a positive social good.