Category: Dating & Love

The release of the Epstein files continues to dominate headlines for what is and isn’t included.

On Feb. 25, 2026, almost a month after the Jan. 30, 2026, document dump by the Department of Justice, both the New York Times and NPR reported on missing memos related to President Donald Trump’s relationship with convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.

Earlier in February, members of the Congress were given access to unredacted versions of these documents. Rep. Cynthia Lummis, a Republican from Wyoming, had this to say when she emerged from the viewing room: “I’ve not been one of the members who has glommed on to this as an issue. … But 9-year-old victims … wow.”

“Well, initially, my reaction to all this was, ‘I don’t care. I don’t know what the big deal is,” she added. “But now I see what the big deal is, and it was worth investigating.”

Whether she meant to do this or not, Lummis’ comments suggested that an alleged global sex trafficking ring involving some of the world’s most powerful people—including, possibly, the president of the United States and several of his high-ranking officials, though they deny all allegations—was not such a big deal when she thought the survivors were teens and young adults.

This sentiment echoes something former Fox News host Megyn Kelly said about the survivors’ ages when a previous round of Epstein files was released in November 2025. On her podcast, Kelly expressed sympathy for the idea that Epstein was not really a pedophile because he was into 15-year-olds—not 8-year-olds. He didn’t like children, Kelly explained, so much as he liked them “barely legal.”

But “barely legal” isn’t a thing (I’ll get to that in a minute), and randomly nuancing the definition of pedophilia shouldn’t be either.

Age isn’t just a number

Let’s start by getting our terms straight: Pedophiles are people who have a sexual preference for children, usually prepubescent children or those who are around the age of puberty. Pedophilia is a psychiatric diagnosis. You can be a pedophile without sexually abusing children, and you can be a child abuser without meeting the diagnostic definition of a pedophile.

The word pedophile instantly conjures up abuse of small children, which makes our hearts break and our skin crawl. This visceral reaction is understandable, and it may explain why Lummis, Kelly, and other public figures have insisted on drawing a distinction between the abuse of young children and the rape of teenagers.

To be clear, the law does not distinguish between a 9-year-old and a 15-year-old—both minors—when it comes to sex. While age of consent laws vary by state, all states see 15 as too young to consent. With the possible rare exception of consenting couples who are close in age (for example, the 18-year-old high school senior dating a 15-year-old sophomore), any adult who has sex with someone 15 or younger has committed a crime.

In some cases that crime is statuatory rape. In others it might be rape or sexual assault. And in some states, teens having sex with teens is illegal, too.

As I said, there’s only legal and illegal—not “barely legal.”

When consent isn’t possible

I believe that teens should be experimenting with sex. I’ve spent much of my career as a sex educator arguing that sexual development and experimentation are natural parts of adolescence that help young people understand themselves and develop the relationship skills they’ll need as adults. Grown-ups should see high school students as capable of having consensual sexual relationships with each other.

But relationships can only be consensual if the couple is on equal footing. When one holds too much control because of their age, status, or position of authority over the other (think coach, teacher, or boss), true consent is rarely possible. Age is not the only power imbalance, but it seems obvious that a 51-year-old man looking for sex from a 14-year-old is a predator—not a partner.

The late financier Epstein has been accused of sexually abusing at least 1,000 young women and children. He had a pattern of offering teenage girls as young as 14 money for massages, during which he would masturbate and touch their genitals with his fingers or sex toys. He would offer these children more money if they would recruit other girls for the same thing.

Epstien has also been accused of forcibly raping girls as young as 14. (Epstein pled guilty to soliciting a minor for sex in Florida in 2008 and was indicted on sex trafficking charges in 2019, but died in jail before a trial could take place.)

Survivors have also said they were abused, assaulted, or raped by friends and acquaintances of Epstein; President Trump has been named in these allegations. The accusations against Trump have not been investigated or verified, but he has previously been found civilly liable for sexual abuse.

Let’s stop saying ‘underage women’

Questioning whether Epstein or others among his we-just-like-them-young buddies were “really pedophiles” as Megyn Kelly did is a twisted game of splitting hairs.

It opens the door for letting some perpetrators of sexual abuse off the hook by implying thatthe pedophile who goes after young children is a pervert, while the CEO who preys on teenagers is just misbehaving. It’s bad but not that bad.

I have to wonder whether this is what some of the men involved in Epstein’s sex ring have told themselves as well. When Trump embraced the QAnon conspiracy theory that there was a secret cabal of powerful pedophiles abusing children and made exposing it part of his 2024 campaign strategy, did he not remember partying with Epstein? Or did he think his name wouldn’t come up because he didn’t consider himself a pedophile?

For some people—and I’m betting that Trump, Lummis, and Kelly fall into this group–the distinction between an 8-year old and a 15-year-old likely seems important because 15-year-old girls can be sexual. Most have breasts and curves and pubic hair. They may wear make-up and short skirts. They probably think about boys or girls or both. They might read spicy books and have sexual fantasies.

Some 15-year-olds even have sex: In 2023, 16 percent of ninth graders and 25 percent of 10th graders reported they had had sexual intercourse. This is likely why we’ve seen so many people—including some legitimate news sources, like NPR—refer to the young girls as “underage women.” Again, that’s not a thing. Even in high heels and mascara, being “underage” means that you’re a child.

And children are children—not women. Suggesting otherwise could lead to blaming girls for wearing the wrong clothes, making bad choices, leading men on, or any number of other things that we tend to put on rape survivors after the fact.

It’s about power

We should stop talking about the age of Epstein’s victims and start talking about their sexual agency—that is, their ability to make conscious, informed, and empowered decisions. Agency is about having a voice and being able to negotiate what you want.

It seems clear to me that the men of this decades-long sex-ring were looking for those who had no agency. The girls and women were reportedly lied to, coerced, threatened, and possibly held against their will. The men didn’t want sexual partners; they wanted control.

None of this is meant to downplay the horror of 9-year-olds being trafficked. If anything, I want to up-play (I know that’s not a word, but I need it to be) the horror of 19-year-olds being trafficked, too. Even though the law may see them as adults, these young women were not empowered to make their own decisions about how they were treated or what they would and wouldn’t do.

The emerging revelations that young children suffered in Epstein’s crimes may make some people, like Lummis, start paying attention, and it may make others, like Kelly, shut up. My hope, though, is that we can stop debating whether the men were pedophiles and start focusing on the survivors.

We can give the survivors back some agency by listening to their stories and believing them—no matter how old they were at the time of their abuse.

Last Updated on February 27, 2026 by Joshua Isibor

If you’re considering switching careers, exploring the job market and identifying the roles that align with your skills, passions, and lifestyle is essential. It can be overwhelming to narrow down your choices with the many options available. From technology to relation advisor, the best jobs for career changers offer competitive salaries, opportunities for growth, and a strong sense of purpose. Here are seven of the best jobs when considering a career change.

Cybersecurity

In today’s digital age, cybersecurity is critical for organizations worldwide. With increasing cyber threats and data breaches, the demand for cybersecurity professionals has risen significantly.

Cybersecurity professionals work to protect an organization’s sensitive data and networks from cyber attacks and security breaches. They play a pivotal role in detecting and preventing security threats, helping companies safeguard their assets, reputation, and customer trust.

With an ever-growing need for cybersecurity experts, this field provides a lucrative career prospect and an opportunity to make a meaningful contribution to society. It is crucial to stay updated on the latest technologies and trends to stay ahead of the curve in this field.

Graphic Designer

Graphic design is an ideal career choice for creative individuals interested in digital media and visual communication. Graphic designers create visuals to communicate a message, often through websites, logos, or other types of advertisements. They develop original concepts, execute designs, and collaborate with other professionals. With the right design skills, you can develop a successful career in this field and make a meaningful contribution to art and design.

Marriage Counselor

Marriage counseling is a unique and in-demand niche that presents many opportunities for those passionate about helping others navigate the challenges of relationships. As a marriage counselor, you’ll have the chance to work closely with couples as they rediscover their love for one another and establish healthy communication patterns.

From premarital counseling to helping couples navigate infidelity and divorce, marriage counseling is a dynamic and rewarding field that will provide ample opportunity for growth and fulfillment. You’ll need the right training and accreditation to provide counseling services in your area to succeed in this field. This job also requires intuition, empathy, and excellent communication skills.

Social Media Manager

With the increasing prominence of social media in our daily lives, the role of a social media manager has become increasingly crucial in business. As a social media manager, you are responsible for creating, developing, and implementing social media strategies for clients or companies to improve their online presence and brand image.

The job requires a sharp eye for trends and innovative marketing ideas, thinking strategically, and strong communication skills. A career as a social media manager could be the perfect fit for those passionate about digital marketing and interested in the ever-evolving world of social media.

Nursing

Nursing offers excellent job security, competitive salaries, and room for growth. Nurses are in high demand globally, and the field is expected to grow significantly in the coming years. Nurses get to work with patients directly, providing care, administering medicine, and working as part of a healthcare team. They can work in hospitals, clinics, and other healthcare facilities.

There are different entry routes into nursing, including certification programs, accelerated BSN programs, or direct entry masters in nursing. With a degree in any field, you can pursue a direct entry masters in nursing and become an advanced practice nurse. With about 20 months of coursework and clinical experience, you can make a successful career change into nursing.

Family Lawyer

For those with a background in law, becoming a family lawyer can be an excellent career change. Family lawyers specialize in matters related to family law and help individuals navigate difficult situations such as adoption, child custody, and divorce. It’s a highly specialized field that requires a deep understanding of the legal system and human emotions.

However, for those with a passion for helping people and a desire to make a difference in their lives, a career as a family lawyer can be fulfilling and meaningful. By considering a career change to become a family lawyer, you are opening yourself up to new opportunities that allow you to use your experience and expertise meaningfully.

Sex Therapist

As a sex therapist, you will provide guidance, advice, and therapy to help individuals and couples improve their sex lives, overcome sexual issues like sexual dysfunction, and achieve sexual health and satisfaction. It’s a profession that requires empathy, communication skills, and an open-minded approach to sexuality. You will need to pursue specialized training and credentials to practice as a sex therapist to ensure you are equipped to handle delicate and sensitive issues with clients.

With the increased sexual health and wellness awareness, there is a high demand for skilled sex therapists to help people navigate their sexual issues and achieve a fulfilling sexual life. A career in sex therapy is an excellent choice for your next career move if you have a passion for helping others and a good understanding of sexual health and wellness.

Making a career change can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. With the right amount of research and preparation, you will find plenty of rewarding options that match your skill set and interests. Whether you choose to become an art and design professional, marriage counselor, family lawyer, social media manager, or sex therapist, you can make a meaningful impact on people’s lives and create lasting experiences.

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Also, Read 5 Ways to Make Your Myrtle Beach Family Vacation Unforgettable

Originally posted 2023-04-24 07:54:07.

Many men search how to stop needing approval from women after noticing how strongly their mood depends on reactions they receive.

You feel good when she replies warmly.
You feel unsettled when she seems distant.
You analyse small changes in tone.

Nothing extreme has happened, yet your emotional state shifts quickly based on her response. Afterwards you recognise that you were not reacting to reality but to what you believed her reaction meant about you.

This pattern is rarely about women themselves. It is about how your mind links social feedback to self evaluation.

Understanding how to stop needing approval from women begins with understanding what approval actually represents psychologically.

Approval is a signal, not a requirement

Approval feels important because your brain interprets it as safety. Positive responses suggest acceptance. Neutral or unclear responses suggest uncertainty.

Your mind then tries to remove uncertainty by adjusting behaviour. You speak more carefully, you soften opinions, and you attempt to maintain positive reactions.

Over time the interaction becomes less about expression and more about stabilising feedback.

You are no longer sharing yourself. You are managing perception.

Why attraction increases the need

You do not usually monitor every interaction. The reaction appears strongest when you care about the outcome.

Attraction adds meaning. The more meaningful the interaction feels, the more your brain attempts to control it.

Control requires constant checking.

Did she like that
Was that too much
Should I change topic

These thoughts do not come from insecurity alone. They come from the belief that approval determines value in that moment.

The internal monitoring loop

Once you begin checking reactions, your attention splits.

One part participates in conversation.
Another part observes how you are being received.

This observer searches for reassurance. The absence of clear reassurance creates tension. To remove tension you adjust behaviour again.

The loop repeats.

Seeking approval increases sensitivity to signals, and increased sensitivity increases the need for approval.

How it changes behaviour

You agree more than you normally would
You avoid mild disagreement
You hesitate before humour
You apologise unnecessarily
You over explain intentions

Nothing dramatic happens, yet your behaviour becomes narrower. The interaction feels polite but less natural.

She experiences someone careful rather than expressive.

Why reassurance does not solve it

Receiving approval gives temporary relief but strengthens the pattern. Your brain learns relief comes from external confirmation.

The next interaction then feels important again because you expect relief only after positive feedback.

This turns approval into a dependency rather than a preference.

The role of imagined evaluation

Often the pressure comes not from her actual reaction but from your interpretation.

A short reply becomes disinterest
A pause becomes judgement
A neutral face becomes rejection

Your mind fills gaps with negative predictions. You respond to imagined meaning rather than real behaviour.

This increases the need for reassurance because you are reacting to uncertainty you created internally.

Why it feels personal

Social feedback is processed quickly by the brain. Attraction magnifies this processing because you assign extra importance to the person.

Your identity becomes momentarily tied to the interaction. Approval feels like validation. Lack of approval feels like loss.

The intensity comes from identification, not from the interaction itself.

Recognising the moment

You can often detect approval seeking early.

You replay sentences immediately after saying them
You adjust opinions mid conversation
You feel relief when she agrees

These signals show the conversation has shifted from shared experience to performance management.

What actually changes the pattern

The change begins when expression occurs before evaluation.

State your thought before predicting reaction
Allow disagreement without repairing instantly
Continue conversation without checking outcome

This interrupts the monitoring loop. The brain learns the interaction continues even without reassurance.

Why discomfort appears first

Reducing approval seeking initially feels uncomfortable. You remove the mechanism that previously reduced uncertainty.

The discomfort is temporary. It represents absence of control rather than negative outcome.

When the conversation continues normally, your brain updates its prediction and lowers the need for monitoring.

The difference between preference and dependence

Preferring positive reactions is natural. Depending on them for emotional stability creates pressure.

When preference becomes dependence, behaviour changes to secure response rather than share experience.

The goal is not indifference. It is stability regardless of response.

Practising neutral responses

You can train this gradually.

Express small opinions without softening
Pause before explaining yourself
Let minor misunderstandings exist briefly

You learn that the interaction rarely collapses because of small differences. Confidence grows from evidence rather than belief.

Long term effect

As monitoring reduces, conversations feel lighter. You notice reactions but do not require them. Behaviour becomes consistent across people because meaning no longer changes based on attractiveness.

Approval becomes information instead of validation.

Final thought

Needing approval from women does not come from weakness. It comes from assigning emotional significance to reactions in real time.

When you allow yourself to express without immediate evaluation, the dependency fades because you experience interaction rather than manage it.

If this pattern continues and you want help becoming steady during interactions rather than analysing them afterwards, you can apply for one to one coaching and work directly on real conversations.

A Feb. 7 protest at the Whipple Federal Building in Minneapolis became decidedly phallic when hundreds of protestors chucked purple and pink dildos at vehicles driving out of the gates of the facility that houses Immigration and Customs Enforcement’s (ICE) office.

“Fuck you” chants resounded as the dildos bounced off a sheriff’s SUV. Police scrambled to gather the dildos and toss them over a fence, away from the protestors screaming “eat a dick.”

Since early January, near daily protests in Minneapolis have demanded an end to the federal occupation of the city, where 3,000 immigration agents were deployed until a drawdown in late February. The protestors have been largely non-violent. The ICE agents have not, leading to the killings of two local residents, Renee Nicole Good and Alex Pretti.

This particular anti-ICE protest employed an unlikely projectile: the humble rubber shaft.

Operation Dildo Blitz

The Minneapolis dildo protest was the brainchild of Rook T. Winchester, a pseudonym for a man who declined to use his legal name for safety reasons.

Much like Portland’s inflatable “protest frogs” and Chicago’s speedo-clad demonstrator, the point of “Operation Dildo Blitz” is what’s known as tactical frivolity—that is, a funny form of protest meant to expose as absurd the government’s claims that protesters are dangerous or violent.

Protesting absurdly, Winchester believes, also irks the immigration agents in a particular way. Mockery, he told Rewire News Group, is “kryptonite for these fascists.”

He got the idea after meeting a young woman during a prayer vigil outside the Florida ICE detention facility known as “Alligator Alcatraz.” After her father was arrested by ICE and transported to that facility, she moved in with a conservative aunt who supports President Donald Trump.

The aunt later kicked her out for being outspoken about her political beliefs, Winchester recalled. In response, the woman “put a suction cup dildo on her aunt’s door as a message for her to … go fuck herself,” Winchester said. He decided dildos could send a similar signal in Minneapolis.

One of the anti-ICE protestors, Russell “Jolly” Ellis, nicknamed the action “Operation Dildo Blitz” in a nod to Operation Midway Blitz, the Trump administration’s aggressive September 2025 immigration enforcement operation in Chicago.

This is not the first time sex toys have been used as a political message.

A 1768 Japanese parody of a samurai etiquette book for women replaced pictures of origami gift wrap with dildos. The authors of the 2013 book Shunga: Sex and Pleasure in Japanese Art took that insertion to be a rebuke of the samurais’ pretensions.

In 2015, an artist inserted dildos in place of guns in Republican leadership’s photos in a bid for more gun control. And in 2016, students at the University of Texas staged a “Cocks Not Glocks” action, where they toted dildos around to protest a concealed carry law.

Five days after “Operation Dildo Blitz,” Border Czar Tom Homan announced that the Minneapolis “surge operation” concluded. As of Feb. 25, roughly 500 agents remained.

Joy is resistance

Winchester knew that Minneapolis-based sex toy store Smitten Kitten had transformed into a donation center that provides supplies to people affected by the ICE operation. So, he called the store to see if they had any dildos they could donate for a protest at the Graduate Hotel in Minneapolis in late January.

“Fuck ICE, how can I help you?” the Smitten Kitten clerk answered.

“We’re going to protest ICE. We’d like to bring some dildos with us. … Can we stop in and get some?” Winchester asked.

The store was game. Winchester and his friend swung by Smitten Kitten and left with dozens of discounted dildos. They then took a Lyft to the Graduate Hotel.

They arrived to a “couple hundred” protesters making noise and hoisting signs. Winchester and his friend distributed the dildos throughout the crowd.

“What people do with these dildos after we hand them out is on them,” Winchester said, recalling that protesters “juggle them, they attach them to their helmets, they wave them.”

The mood shifted from intense chanting and noisemaking to a lighter atmosphere—until a protester tossed a dildo at the feet of an ICE agent. It didn’t touch the agent, according to Winchester.

He claimed that, “No one was hurt, other than their egos.”

Nonetheless, Winchester said, he believes the agent retaliated by spraying pepper balls.

“I didn’t see the pepper ball get shot, but I certainly breathed it in,” Winchester said.

Natalie Johnson, CEO of Minneapolis-based sex toy manufacturer Like a Kitten, saw a video of the protester being pepper sprayed on social media. She said the violence shows “how much lack of control there is over these federal agents.”

“It’s that whole culture of fragile masculinity, and nothing puts a point on that as much as just throwing a dick at their feet,” Johnson added.

Dildos made another appearance at an anti-ICE protest about a week later outside the Whipple Federal Building. And this time, there were a lot more of them.

Johnson got connected to Winchester and asked if protest attendees would need more dildos. He said they did. She offered to donate 500 dildos. She purchased them for about $2 a piece from a local bank that was liquidating excess inventory from a recently shuttered Minneapolis adult store.

Winchester drove to Johnson’s warehouse and filled up his Subaru Crosstrek’s backseat and hatchback with boxes of eight-inch dildos, in colors ranging from clear to Day-Glo pink to purple. This time, he and a friend drove to the Whipple Federal Building in Minneapolis, wheeled the dildos out in a wagon. They passed them out to the crowd of protesters that the dildo distributors estimated to be in the hundreds.

Ellis arrived at the protest around 11:15 a.m. He was covering it for his Instagram and working as a “designated dildo retriever.” After protestors threw the dildos over the fence in front of the Whipple Building, he would gather them before police did.

“There’s this ridiculous juxtaposition of these agents that are armed to the teeth with masks on, and bulletproof vests, and AR-15s, and we were literally armed with rubber dicks,” Ellis told RNG.

Ellis said the protest felt different than the others he’d attended at Whipple.

“There was joy because people felt like they could express some of that righteous anger,” Ellis said. “Joy is resistance. Fascism wants you to be bitter and miserable and angry and wants you to just give up.”

After about nine cars had been pelted with dildos, Ellis said he was “certain” he’d be arrested, even though he wasn’t throwing any dildos. He’d previously seen protestors being arrested outside of Whipple for throwing bologna and snowballs.

“Then it occurred to me exactly why they’re not arresting nobody, because then they have to have an arrest report that says ‘arrested for throwing dildos,’ ” Ellis hypothesized.

Winchester and Ellis both left as tensions rose.

“When [the dildos] all started getting lobbed over the fence, and I heard a car get hit, then I was like, all right, well, I guess the distribution is done, because I’m not there to hurt anyone,” Winchester said. “We’re nonviolent.”

Eventually, at least 42 people were arrested at the Whipple protest for failure to disperse. The Hennepin County Sheriff reported that chunks of ice were thrown and that an officer was hit in the head. Winchester disputes that account.

When Johnson watched videos of the protests, she saw some commenters saying that the protest showed “how crazy and unhinged everyone on the left is.” But she thinks it’s absurd to be more upset about throwing dildos than about taking children from their parents and killing civilians.

“Why are you having this reaction to a dildo when you are not having this kind of reaction to human life?” Johnson asked.

The supply is cut off

When protestors from across the country contact Johnson to ask if she can supply sex toys, she suggests they go to their local sex toy store. Johnson’s dildo supply line has ended.

Recently, when she called her bank contact to purchase more of the liquidated supply, the man said he’d been informed that the bank could no longer sell dildos. He said management had expressed concern that its customers would be upset about their bank selling sex toys.

Johnson believes the decision was political—that the bank cut her off because the dildos were used to protest ICE. (The bank in question declined to comment on this matter.)

Though her supply in Minneapolis has been cut off, the anti-ICE dildo movement has spread nationwide, most recently at a State of the Swamp protest in Washington, D.C., on Feb. 24. Winchester brought a suitcase of dildos to distribute to protestors. The Portland protest frog also joined the demonstration in the capital.

“It’s in line with the spirit of the Merry Pranksters or Abbie Hoffman,” Winchester said, referring to some notoriously mischievous activists from U.S. history.

ICE defenders “want to have this narrative that we’re all a blood thirsty, violent mob. But once you stick dildos in our hands and we embrace that absurdity, it becomes harder for them to fight.”

Last Updated on February 26, 2026 by Joshua Isibor

What is a chastity belt and how can it be used?

Chastity belts have fascinated people for centuries as a controversial symbol of control and restraint. Despite their reputation as a medieval torture device, the reality of chastity belts is far more complex. While there is historical evidence of their use in the middle ages and beyond, modern-day chastity belts are typically used as a BDSM kink accessory rather than a practical tool for controlling a partner’s sexuality.

So what exactly is a chastity belt and how can it be used? In this article, we’ll delve into the history of chastity belts, explore their many variations, and discuss the reasons why people might choose to incorporate them into their sexual activities. From the traditional iron and leather belts of centuries past to the high-tech, remote-controlled devices of today, we’ll explore the ins and outs of chastity belt use, discussing what they can and cannot do, and examining the myths and misconceptions surrounding these intriguing and controversial accessories. In case you felt like buying one of these devices, you can check out the vast array of chastitycage.com.au.

1. A chastity belt is a locking device that has been used historically to prevent sexual activity.

A chastity belt is a locking device that has been used historically to prevent sexual activity. It is typically worn around the waist and over the genitalia, with a locking mechanism to prevent removal. The concept of chastity belts can be traced back to the Middle Ages, where they were used to protect women from unwanted sexual advances, adultery, and promiscuity. While the use of chastity belts has largely declined in modern times, they may still be used for various reasons such as fetish play or as an alternative method of birth control. It is important to note that the use of a chastity belt should always be consensual and its use should be discussed between all parties involved. Additionally, proper hygiene must be maintained to prevent infection or discomfort from prolonged wear.

2. The device is typically worn around the waist and can be made of various materials such as metal or leather.

A chastity belt is a device typically worn around the waist by both men and women, designed to prevent sexual activity. The device can be made of various materials such as metal or leather and is secured around the waist, with an additional strap or cage securing the genitals from any unwanted stimulation. The intended purpose of a chastity belt is to provide a level of control and restriction over an individual’s sexual behavior or to prevent promiscuity. Chastity belts have been around for centuries and were mainly used in medieval times by men to ensure the faithfulness of their wives or daughters. Nowadays, chastity belts are also popularly used in BDSM relationships as part of their sexual play.

3. Chastity belts can be used for personal reasons such as self-control or as part of a BDSM relationship dynamic.

A chastity belt is a type of device that is worn around the waist, hips, or groin area to prevent sexual activity or masturbation. Historically, chastity belts were used as a means of controlling women’s sexuality and to ensure their fidelity to their husbands. However, today, chastity belts have evolved and can be used for personal reasons such as self-control, or as a part of a consensual BDSM relationship dynamic. In the BDSM community, chastity belts are often worn by a submissive partner as a way to give control of their sexual pleasure to their dominant partner. The belts can be locked and only accessible to the dominant partner, giving them complete control over when or if the submissive partner can experience sexual release. Chastity belts, whether used for personal or consenting BDSM reasons, should be used with caution and only after careful consideration of the potential physical and psychological effects.

4. It is important to ensure that the belt fits properly and is comfortable for extended use.

When using a chastity belt, it is important to ensure that the belt fits properly and is comfortable for extended use. A poorly fitting chastity belt can cause discomfort, chafing, or even injury to the wearer. In order to ensure a good fit, it is recommended to measure the waist and hips accurately before purchasing a chastity belt, and to follow the manufacturer’s instructions for sizing. Additionally, it may be helpful to try on different types of chastity belts to find one that is comfortable for extended use. Remember that wearing a chastity belt is a personal decision and should only be done with informed consent and with respect for the wearer’s comfort and boundaries.

5. Consensual and responsible use of chastity belts can add to a healthy and fulfilling sex life.

There is a long history of chastity belts being used to prevent sexual activity, either for religious or controlling purposes. However, when used in a consensual and responsible manner, they can add to a healthy and fulfilling sex life for both partners. A chastity belt, when worn by one partner, can offer a sense of submission and control, while the other partner assumes the role of the keyholder. This can lead to increased intimacy and trust in the relationship. It is important to note that the use of chastity belts should always be consensual and involve open communication between both partners. Proper hygiene and regular breaks from wearing the device are also crucial for maintaining physical and emotional health. Ultimately, the use of a chastity belt should be viewed as just one aspect of a broader exploration of sexual preferences and desires between partners.

In conclusion, chastity belts are an interesting piece of history that have been around for centuries, and still pique interest to this day. While their actual use in the past may have been debatable, modern use for fetishes, BDSM, and self-control seem to be the main reasons people use them today. Whether used as a fashion statement, a tool for domination, or for self-restraint, the chastity belt remains an intriguing and enigmatic object. It’s important to note, however, that in today’s world, consent and safety are of the utmost importance when exploring any type of kink or sexual play.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Originally posted 2023-04-13 14:55:59.

In part two of her series on true crime and disability, Imani Gandy interviews Dateline correspondent Josh Mankiewicz about true crime as a machine that decides whose stories get told—and whose don’t. From missing Black women, to missing and murdered Indigenous people, to the near invisibility of disabled victims, they talk about what true crime shows—and what it leaves out.

Because attention itself is a form of power.

(And yes, there’s a Bill Hader moment.)

Transcript

Episodes like this take time, research, and a commitment to the truth. If you love B*tch, Listen, chip in to keep help Imani keep her podcast going. Become a supporter today.

Imani has relaunched her column, AngryBlackLady Chronicles. Sign up for our newsletters here to read it first.

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The rise of emotionally unavailable dating for women entrepreneurs is reshaping how ambitious, high-achieving women approach relationships. As founders and business leaders become more protective of their time, emotional energy, and mental clarity, traditional dating norms no longer meet their needs. Instead of tolerating ambiguity or investing in unclear connections, many women entrepreneurs are redefining relationship standards through direct communication, emotional intelligence, and faster decision-making.

Relationship coaches and psychology experts reveal four key ways successful women are adapting their expectations — using intentional strategies to ensure dating supports, rather than disrupts, their personal and professional growth.

• Expect Prompt Clear Replies
• Use a First Date Empathy Test
• State Commitment Early
• Prioritize Proven Emotional Capacity

Expect Prompt, Clear Replies

Whether it’s professional or romantic, my standby for a good relationship is responsiveness: the quicker, the better (within reasonable limits).

That wasn’t always the case. I used to give people more leeway with delayed or non-replies, following up several times. Now I usually take foot-dragging or silence as a “no-go.”

In business and in dating, rejection is a reality. Regardless of the reasons, I’d rather have an answer than be left guessing, which can waste time and be draining.

I like it when people show they care through clear and honest communication. Giving definite answers fosters trust and reduces anxiety. It’s a sign of emotional maturity and stability; you’re bold enough to “show your hand” without resorting to sleight of hand, and in the process, respect yourself and the other person.

Michelle Troutman, Founder/Blogger, MyJourneytoLove.com

Use a First Date Empathy Test

When I first started dating after my divorce, I gave people a lot of benefit of the doubt. I assumed others, like me, were generally considerate, truthful, honest, and caring.

But as a busy entrepreneur — and a stress management coach who teaches the CALM Process and encourages clients to eliminate behaviors that create unnecessary stress — I realized I couldn’t keep wasting time on emotionally unavailable people. I no longer had the capacity for someone with no empathy, no curiosity about the human condition, someone who just sits pretty, brags about their achievements, and lacks basic emotional awareness.

Also, I remember sharing this frustration with a friend who had also started dating. I asked her what she thought about men with emotional intelligence. She laughed and said, “They’re all like that, honey — you need to lower your standards.”

But I’m not lowering my standards. I’m shortening the amount of time I give people to show me who they are. Now, I do most of my filtering on the first date with a very simple moment. You know how everyone asks, “How are you?” Sometimes I answer honestly and say, “I’m sad.” Then I watch how they respond.

Someone with empathy will ask why. Someone emotionally mature will be able to hold that moment with care. But those who don’t ask, immediately tell me I’m wrong, dismiss my feelings, or say things like, “I said on my profile I don’t want drama” — well, they definitely don’t make it past the appetizers.

Lolita Guarin, Stress Management Expert, Speaker & Author, Be Amazing You

State Commitment Early

As a woman entrepreneur, I’ve become so much more direct, as emotionally unavailable dating is commonplace now. I don’t assume someone is emotionally mature or looking for something long-term. I don’t expect an instant connection, but I do expect honesty. On a first date, I talk about what I want, where I see myself in the next few years, and that I’m not interested in a casual relationship with no future. I’m not interrogating anyone, but I’m upfront about what I’m looking for.

Since I run a company, my time and energy are limited, and I just don’t want to spend months wondering what someone wants. Being upfront on the first date helps me filter out people who aren’t open to a committed relationship. They usually hold their hands up, and the date ends early, which saves us both from disappointment. If we’re not looking for the same thing on the same timeline, I’d rather find out after one coffee than waste a year.

Amy Bos, Co-Founder & COO, Mediumchat Group

Prioritize Proven Emotional Capacity

As dating becomes increasingly dominated by emotionally unavailable partners, I’ve changed my perspective on the expectation of emotional availability in my daily interactions. My initial filter used to be ambition, chemistry, and common interests, but now these things don’t mean anything to me unless the person has the emotional capacity to be reliable, self-aware, and will communicate clearly. I observe how people demonstrate accountability, follow through, and manage discomfort because emotional availability cannot be stated, it must be proven through behaviour over a long period of time.

The change is significant for me as I am an entrepreneurial woman and my daily life typically requires high levels of personal responsibility, self-regulation and self-intentionality. I no longer have time in my life to engage in relationships that introduce additional confusion or layers of emotional work that come from a partner that wants to “take it slow”. I expect both partners in a relationship to be present and have defined expectations based on who they are at the start of a relationship and continuing until the end of a relationship. Healthy relationships provide people with a sense of stability and opportunities for mutual growth. They do not cause further chaos and/or complication that requires constant definition or explanation for both parties involved.

Carissa Kruse, Business & Marketing Strategist, Carissa Kruse Weddings

Conclusion

The shift toward higher relationship standards is not about becoming more selective — it reflects a deeper understanding of emotional sustainability. As emotionally unavailable dating for women entrepreneurs becomes more common, successful women are responding by prioritizing clarity, empathy, and proven emotional presence from the start.

By applying the same intentional decision-making used in business to their personal lives, women entrepreneurs are redefining modern relationships. The result is a dating approach built on mutual respect, emotional maturity, and alignment — ensuring partnerships enhance success rather than compete with it.

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Balancing business growth with personal well-being is one of the most complex challenges modern founders face. Increasingly, soft partnering for women entrepreneurs is emerging as a powerful approach that prioritizes collaboration, emotional intelligence, and flexibility over rigid structures and constant urgency. Rather than operating through pressure-driven partnerships, soft partnering focuses on trust, shared values, and mutual support — allowing entrepreneurs to grow their businesses without sacrificing family life, mental clarity, or long-term sustainability.

In this article, experienced founders and advisors share five practical ways soft partnering creates space for professional success while protecting the lifestyle and personal priorities that matter most.

• Grow with Purpose and Family
• Reduce Friction and Decision Fatigue
• Keep Home Calm to Build
• Lead Through Care and Autonomy
• Test Ideas Without Heavy Commitments

Grow with Purpose and Family

To me, soft partnering is about building a business rooted in collaboration, trust, and shared values rather than hierarchy or constant urgency. It’s choosing to work with partners — whether artisans, suppliers, team members and even clients — who respect people, process, and purpose, and who understand that sustainability applies to relationships as much as it does to products.

One of the ways this supports my entrepreneurial lifestyle is that it allows my business to grow alongside my life as a mother, not in competition with it. By forming thoughtful, values-aligned partnerships and taking a more human, intentional approach to growth, I’ve been able to step away from rigid expectations and create something that feels grounded, authentic and sustainable.

Soft partnering has given me the freedom to build my business with care and integrity — while staying present for my family and creating work that truly feels meaningful.

Anjali H., Founder, Malabar Baby

Reduce Friction and Decision Fatigue

As I see Soft Partnering, it’s a collaboration that is based on emotional intelligence and mutual respect for one another, as opposed to control or hierarchy. Therefore, when creating partnerships, one can honour each other’s autonomy while simultaneously creating a collective momentum. Soft Partnering creates an opportunity for entrepreneurs to be supported and encouraged to grow in their business while creating a foundation of trust and a shared vision for success.

What I appreciate most about Soft Partnering, and how Soft Partnering has created an environment of sustainability in my entrepreneurship, is that it provides an opportunity to operate in a sustainable manner.

By embracing the collaborative environment of Soft Partnering, business owners can reduce friction and decision-making fatigue and free up more energy to focus and create a clear and intentional plan of action for themselves and their teams. The opportunity to partner with another person to create and innovate a shared vision allows you and your partner to support one another in your growth, and through soft partnership, both your personal well-being and business creations grow simultaneously rather than competing against each other.

Carissa Kruse, Business & Marketing Strategist, Carissa Kruse Weddings

Keep Home Calm to Build

To me, soft partnering means our marriage is a soft place to land, not another place to prove myself. We stay kind with each other, we don’t keep score, and we assume we’re on the same side even when we’re tired.

In my day to day, it looks like small, gentle agreements that protect my nervous system. If I’m in a launch week or traveling, I tell my husband what kind of week it is and what I can realistically give. He doesn’t take my shorter bandwidth personally, and I don’t bring the emotional leftovers of clients into our kitchen.

I take ten minutes to come down before dinner, and we do a quick check in so we stay connected without turning the evening into a debrief.

That softness is not fluffy. It’s practical. It keeps our home calm, and when home is calm, I can build a demanding business without becoming hard.

Jeanette Brown, Personal and career coach; Founder, Jeanettebrown.net

Lead Through Care and Autonomy

As a woman entrepreneur, soft partnering represents a leadership approach rooted in trust, empathy, and shared accountability rather than hierarchy or control. It shows up in how relationships with teams, clients, and partners are built through alignment on outcomes while allowing flexibility in how those outcomes are achieved. In an entrepreneurial lifestyle that often blends professional intensity with personal responsibility, this model creates resilience. Research from McKinsey shows organizations with inclusive and collaborative leadership are 25% more likely to outperform peers on profitability, reinforcing that relational strength directly impacts business performance. One practical way soft partnering supports entrepreneurship is by reducing burnout and decision fatigue — strong partners step in with context and confidence, enabling faster decisions without micromanagement. That balance between autonomy and support sustains long-term growth while preserving the agility required to lead in fast-changing global markets.

Anupa Rongala, CEO, Invensis Technologies

Test Ideas Without Heavy Commitments

A partnership that offers flexibility through trust-based agreements, as opposed to legal avenues, will help expand and develop businesses in ways that are not restrictive or burdensome. A more “soft” approach to partnerships will help you align yourself with collaborators, building mutually beneficial relationships based on skills complementary to yours rather than signing a contract, which creates increased pressure and risk for momentum.

Early in my experience starting my business, I viewed every potential partnership as high stakes, resulting in high-pressure situations and delayed progress due to excessive concern over committing. Using a soft approach to partnerships allows me to try out ideas, share resources and test new thinking in a space where I don’t have to put too much energy towards either side. For instance, collaborating with another organisation at the conception of a product or service will provide an opportunity to lower initial expectations for both companies, with the goal of mutually benefiting from their collaboration. If we both make money, we are successful; if we don’t, both companies are free from obligation and there are no bad after-effects on either company.

The use of soft partnerships will give me a less stressful way of obtaining resources. They will allow me to increase the number of resources and networks at my disposal, which are critical in developing both a successful business and remaining true to oneself. All of this growth will result from the progression of the business and individual.

Erin Friez, President, Digital Wealth Partners

Conclusion

Soft partnering challenges the traditional belief that success requires constant intensity or rigid control. Instead, it demonstrates that sustainable entrepreneurship grows through trust, flexibility, and aligned relationships. For women entrepreneurs, this approach creates a powerful balance — enabling businesses to scale while protecting emotional well-being, family priorities, and creative energy.

By choosing collaboration over pressure and alignment over urgency, founders can build ventures that are not only successful but also deeply sustainable. In the long run, soft partnering isn’t just a relationship strategy — it becomes a leadership advantage that supports both thriving businesses and fulfilling lives.

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Last Updated on October 4, 2025 by Joshua Isibor

A romantic getaway together can add some spark to a relationship and make your relationship a happier one. Here are some tips to do so and enjoy company with your significant other. 

Focus On Simplicity

It is easy to get carried away when it is time to plan a romantic getaway. Instead, you will want to keep things as simple as possible. The goal is to relax and make sure you are learning more about each other and keeping the trip as short as you can. This will allow you to enjoy the trip and also avoid putting too much stress on yourself during the trip. As time goes on, you can go on difficult trips that require intricate planning.

Put The Phone Away

This is not the time to stay on your phone all the time. You will want to put the phone away and have limits on what you are doing when it comes to the trip. Focus on each other during the trip. This is most important as a couple.

Be Flexible

When you are planning this type of romantic trip, you will want to make sure to stay as flexible as possible during the process. It is not easy to do this when you have so many things on the itinerary and it becomes difficult to keep up. Any trip that is too busy will become cumbersome and not worth it. There are plenty of great hotels to take breaks in the UK. You can enjoy yourself and plan to rest between activities and be ready to make adjustments during the process too. 

Communicate With Each Other

You should always be aware of how the other person feels. This is key when it comes to making sure you are addressing underlying issues and ensuring both people are having a good time. It’s not just about asking once but keeping tabs on each other at all times.

Spend Some “Me” Time Too

It is easy to always want to spend time together and that is great for a romantic getaway. However, you will also want to take the time to focus on yourself too. This can be done by taking a few hours during the trip to just relax on your own. You can do different things based on whatever you believe is going to be fun at that moment and it does not have to be with your partner. It can even be something as simple as going for a massage or sitting on the beach reading a book.

Take Care Of The Issues Right Away

It is common for issues to arise during a trip. Discuss them with your partner and take care of the problem as they come. Don’t let them simmer for too long as that will ruin the trip.

ALSO, READ BEST ROMANTIC LOVE LETTERS FOR HIM OR HER

Originally posted 2023-04-11 13:44:30.

In 2026, dating culture has a new buzzword: ChemRIZZtry.

You have probably heard people say, “We had chemistry,” or “He’s got rizz.” But what happens when you combine both? You get ChemRIZZtry – the sweet spot where emotional chemistry meets confident charisma.

So what exactly is ChemRIZZtry? And why does it matter more than ever in online dating and modern relationships?

Let’s break it down using psychology and neuroscience.

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What Does ChemRIZZtry Mean?

ChemRIZZtry is the intersection of:

It is not just flirting. It is not just compatibility. It is both.

ChemRIZZtry happens when:

• Conversation flows naturally

• Eye contact feels intense but comfortable

• Playful energy blends with emotional safety

• Attraction feels exciting and grounded at the same time

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The Psychology Behind ChemRIZZtry

Attraction is not random. It follows predictable psychological patterns supported by research.

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1. Emotional Responsiveness Creates Attraction

One of the strongest predictors of romantic attraction is Perceived partner responsiveness.

Research shows that when someone feels understood, validated, and emotionally supported, closeness increases dramatically. This is also supported by findings on Responsiveness and intimacy development, which demonstrate that feeling “seen” fosters romantic bonding.

This explains why pure charm without emotional depth rarely lasts. ChemRIZZtry requires both responsiveness and charisma.

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2. Dopamine Drives the Spark

Early-stage attraction activates the brain’s reward system. Studies on Dopamine and romantic love show that romantic attraction stimulates dopamine-rich areas associated with motivation and pleasure.

Similarly, research on Neural mechanisms of early-stage romantic love confirms that romantic excitement activates reward pathways similar to other highly motivating experiences.

Playful teasing, novelty, and confident social energy increase dopamine activity. That is where “rizz” plays a role. But without emotional safety, dopamine-driven attraction fades quickly.

ChemRIZZtry balances excitement with emotional grounding.

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3. Nonverbal Synchrony Builds Connection

Attraction is often visible before it is verbal.

Research on Nonverbal synchrony in social interaction shows that people who unconsciously mirror each other’s movements and speech rhythms report stronger feelings of connection.

Studies on Behavioral mirroring and interpersonal liking also demonstrate that subtle imitation increases liking and perceived compatibility.

You notice ChemRIZZtry when:

• You lean in at the same time

• You laugh naturally together

• Silence feels comfortable

• Your conversation rhythm aligns

It feels effortless because your nervous systems are syncing.

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4. Emotional Intelligence Strengthens Attraction

Long-term romantic success is strongly linked to Emotional intelligence and relationship satisfaction.

Research also highlights how Emotional intelligence in romantic relationships predicts better communication and conflict management.

ChemRIZZtry is not just about the spark. It is about sustaining attraction through emotional awareness and empathy.

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5. Attachment Security Makes Chemistry Feel Safe

Attachment theory explains why some attraction feels calm while others feel chaotic.

Research on attachment theory in adult romantic relationships consistently shows that securely attached individuals experience higher relationship satisfaction, greater emotional stability, and more enduring romantic bonds.

Further studies on Adult attachment and relationship quality confirm that attachment security predicts healthier romantic dynamics.

When someone is confident but emotionally secure, attraction feels exciting without anxiety. That is ChemRIZZtry at its healthiest.

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ChemRIZZtry in Online Dating

In modern dating apps, attraction can feel superficial. But ChemRIZZtry shows up in:

Too much rizz without authenticity feels performative.
Too much seriousness without playfulness feels flat.

The strongest connections combine emotional depth and confident charm.

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Signs You Have ChemRIZZtry

You may be experiencing ChemRIZZtry if:

• Time moves quickly when you talk

• You feel both excited and relaxed

• You can flirt and be vulnerable

• Eye contact feels magnetic but safe

• The energy feels mutual, not forced

It is attraction with emotional intelligence.

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Final Thoughts

ChemRIZZtry is not just a trend. It reflects a deeper truth supported by psychology and neuroscience.

Attraction is strongest when:

• Emotional responsiveness is present

• Dopamine-driven excitement exists

• Nonverbal synchrony aligns

• Emotional intelligence sustains connection

• Attachment security creates safety

Charm alone fades. Chemistry alone may feel unstable.

But when emotional depth meets confident charisma, attraction becomes magnetic.

That is ChemRIZZtry.

Many men search why they go blank in conversations with women after an interaction where their mind suddenly stopped working.

You were speaking normally.
She asked something simple.
Your thoughts disappeared.

You knew words existed somewhere in your head but you could not reach them.

Seconds later the moment passed and the sentence came back too late.

Afterwards you replay the interaction and feel frustrated because you are not usually someone who struggles to talk. The experience feels specific to certain situations rather than your personality overall.

This reaction rarely comes from lacking intelligence, humour, or social ability. It comes from how attention changes when pressure appears.

Understanding why you go blank in conversations with women begins with understanding what your brain is doing at that exact moment.

Going blank is not absence of thoughts

When your mind goes blank you assume nothing exists to say. In reality your brain is processing too much at once.

Conversation normally runs automatically. You listen, interpret, and respond without conscious effort. Under pressure the automatic system is interrupted by a monitoring system.

Your brain starts checking behaviour while trying to produce behaviour.

This creates a temporary overload. Words are still forming but cannot reach speech because attention is divided.

So the blank feeling is not emptiness. It is interference.

The attention split

The moment you become aware of her opinion mattering, your attention divides.

Part of you listens to her.
Part of you listens to yourself.

You begin asking silent questions.

Do I sound confident
Was that interesting
What should I say next

Instead of responding directly to her sentence, you evaluate potential responses before choosing one. This slows access to speech.

While you evaluate, the conversation continues. By the time you select a response, the moment has moved.

Your brain interprets this delay as nothing to say.

Why it happens with women you like

With friends or colleagues you rarely go blank because nothing important feels at risk. You respond immediately because no evaluation is needed.

Attraction introduces consequence in your mind. You believe the next sentence might change how she sees you.

That belief forces conscious control over a process normally automatic.

Automatic systems are fast. Controlled systems are slow.

You experience the speed difference as a blank.

The role of prediction

Your brain attempts to predict her reaction before speaking. Prediction uses working memory, the same resource needed to form sentences.

While predicting, less capacity remains for speaking. The brain pauses output until prediction completes.

But conversation does not wait for prediction. So silence appears.

You interpret silence as failure, which increases pressure, which increases prediction, which increases silence.

Why the words come back later

After the interaction ends the pressure disappears. Monitoring stops. The automatic system resumes control.

Suddenly the response appears instantly.

This proves you always had something to say. The pathway was temporarily blocked by evaluation.

Understanding this removes the belief that you lack conversational ability.

The behaviours surrounding the blank

You often stall with filler phrases
You repeat part of her question
You laugh briefly to buy time
You change topic suddenly

These behaviours are attempts to regain processing time. They feel awkward because they are not reactions but delays.

The more you notice them, the more self aware you become, increasing the chance of another blank moment.

Why trying harder makes it worse

Many people attempt to solve this by preparing topics or memorising questions. Preparation increases monitoring because you compare reality to your plan.

Instead of listening fully you check whether you are using the correct material. The mind becomes future focused rather than present focused.

This reduces available attention further.

The harder you try to avoid blanks, the more likely they occur.

The connection to pressure

Going blank rarely occurs mid story or when explaining something familiar. It appears during uncertain moments where social meaning feels important.

Your brain prioritises avoiding mistakes over producing speech. Silence becomes safer than wrong wording.

The intention is protection, not incompetence.

Recognising the moment early

You can detect the blank forming before it fully happens.

Your breathing becomes shallow
You feel aware of your face
You stop hearing the end of her sentence

These signals show attention shifting inward. Interrupting at this stage prevents the full mental freeze.

What actually changes the response

Speech returns when reaction happens before evaluation.

Respond to the first thought rather than the best thought.
Allow imperfect sentences.
Stay focused on what she said instead of what you will say.

When you react immediately, the automatic system stays active and the monitoring system quietens.

The goal is not to think faster but to think less before speaking.

Why imperfect responses help

Conversation rewards timing more than precision. A slightly clumsy immediate reply feels natural. A perfect delayed reply feels forced.

By accepting minor imperfection you keep the process automatic. The brain learns speed matters more than correctness.

Over time blanks reduce because evaluation stops interrupting.

Practising outside dating

You can train this in everyday situations.

Answer questions quickly without refining
Comment on observations instantly
Avoid rehearsing sentences internally

Repetition teaches your brain that immediate expression is safe. The monitoring system activates less often.

The long term shift

Eventually you notice the blank moment still begins but ends quickly. The brain stops escalating because it no longer expects danger.

Confidence develops as a side effect of reduced interference rather than increased ability.

You already had the ability. You removed the obstacle.

Final thought

Going blank in conversations with women is not caused by lacking ideas. It is caused by trying to manage perception while speaking.

When you allow yourself to respond before evaluating, conversation becomes easier because your mind stops blocking its own output.

If this keeps happening and you want help staying present during real interactions instead of analysing afterwards, you can apply for one to one coaching and work directly on your conversations.

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In today’s fast-paced dating world, breadcrumbing in dating has become one of the most confusing and emotionally draining experiences — especially for high-achieving women entrepreneurs who value clarity, intention, and mutual effort. Breadcrumbing happens when someone offers just enough attention to keep interest alive without committing to meaningful progress.

For women balancing ambitious careers and personal growth, recognizing these patterns early is essential to protecting both emotional energy and valuable time. Relationship experts share four clear signs of breadcrumbing and practical ways to respond with confidence, boundaries, and self-respect so your dating life supports — rather than distracts from — your success.

• Reject Mixed Signals and Pare Noise
• Mirror Investment and Prioritize Fairness
• Test Effort and Decide Fast
• Expect Action Then Enforce Boundaries

Reject Mixed Signals and Pare Noise

In the boardroom, your ability to solve complex problems is your superpower. In dating, it’s your kryptonite. High-achieving women often misinterpret breadcrumbing as a gap to be bridged with more effort, but mixed signals aren’t a puzzle to solve — they are a lack of interest to be accepted. This is the core philosophy of Pare Dating: Success isn’t about accumulating more options or fixing broken ones; it’s about ruthlessly paring down the noise. When you cut away the inconsistency, you stop over-functioning in dead-end connections and create space for the clarity you actually deserve.

Emma Irvine, CEO, Pare Dating

Mirror Investment and Prioritize Fairness

When I first started dating after my divorce a few years ago, I wanted to be a nice person. As a woman — and a busy entrepreneur — I was understanding when they were too busy to respond for a week, didn’t ask questions, or canceled dates at the last minute. I told myself that if I was nice to people, they would be nice to me. And in general, that belief works.

But after quite a few dates, I realized that being nice, kind, giving, and people-pleasing did not work in dating. I was wasting time and energy on men who simply weren’t as invested as I was — and as a high-achieving entrepreneur, I couldn’t afford that.

One day, I came across a video that said, “Match their energy. Give them back what they give you.” At first, I was hesitant to try that approach — until I reached a point of exhaustion.

Now, I pay close attention to how much effort someone puts into getting to know me. If it’s just a “good morning” text followed by silence, no invitation to meet within the first week, no genuine questions — only surface-level compliments like “You’re cute” — that doesn’t cut it for me anymore.

I wish I had known this from the beginning.

Women, especially busy entrepreneurs: don’t be nice. Be fair.

Lolita Guarin, Stress Management Expert, Speaker & Author, Be Amazing You

Test Effort and Decide Fast

After years working in hospice and oncology, I learned to recognize when someone’s giving you false hope versus real presence. The clearest breadcrumbing sign I use: watch if they show up during inconvenient moments. Anyone can send sweet texts at 10pm when they’re bored, but will they meet you for coffee at 7 am on a Tuesday when it disrupts their routine? That’s the filter.

I had a patient’s daughter once tell me she realized her boyfriend never visited during her mom’s hard weeks — only during the “good” periods when it was emotionally easy. That pattern of only showing up when it costs them nothing taught her everything. She ended it within a month.

My response is clinical and fast. I create one small test that requires actual effort on their end — like “I’m free Thursday at 6 pm for dinner, does that work?” — and I don’t offer alternatives or flexibility. If they can’t commit to something that specific and soon, I know my answer. I spent too many years watching people realize too late they’d wasted time on the wrong things, so I move quickly when patterns emerge.

Working in hematology taught me that some things need immediate intervention and some need monitoring. Breadcrumbing gets immediate intervention — I cut it off at the first clear pattern because I’ve seen what happens when women ignore their gut about inconsistency. It never gets better; it just steals months you could’ve spent finding someone real.

Dawn Dewane, Family Nurse Practitioner, Bliss Medical Spa and Wellness

Expect Action Then Enforce Boundaries

One way I identify breadcrumbing is by seeing people engage regularly in constant communication that creates an emotional attachment without providing commitment or making any movement towards the next step. These conversations happen regularly as thought-out check-ins, flirtation, or intermittent interest, and they seem to have a lot of engagement. Still, in the end, they do not result in any concrete plans and/or aligned effort. This type of breadcrumbing is more subtle for high-achieving women, as it appears like a connection while also stalling any forward momentum that is building.

The way I handle breadcrumbing is through firmly established boundaries. I do not become fixated on clarity; I expect it. When I have seen this pattern of breadcrumbing, I approach the person I’m interested in directly with calm, factual, and honest communication about what I’ve picked up, and I watch for the behavior to change rather than just relying on what the person says. If I still see the same repeated action from that person after discussing it, I will walk away from them without over-explaining myself and/or my feelings. Setting boundaries and protecting my time, energy, and emotional bandwidth is a part of having self-respect, and maintaining those boundaries ensures that I continue to uphold both my personal and professional standards.

Carissa Kruse, Business & Marketing Strategist, Carissa Kruse Weddings

Conclusion

Breadcrumbing in dating thrives on ambiguity, but clarity is a powerful advantage — especially for high-achieving women entrepreneurs who already understand the value of intentional decisions. By recognizing mixed signals early, matching effort levels, testing genuine interest, and enforcing firm boundaries, you shift dating from emotional guesswork to empowered choice. The right relationship will never require constant decoding; it will meet you with consistency, action, and respect that aligns with the standards you uphold in every other area of your life.

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Amanda was no stranger to depressive moods. But after giving birth to her second child in four years, she felt worse than she’d ever felt in her life.

The pharmacist and mother of two from South Carolina, whose last name has been withheld to protect her privacy, had dealt with anxiety and depression on and off throughout adulthood. Amanda could usually manage her symptoms with an SSRI, or selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor, the most prescribed type of antidepressant medication.

That worked even after the traumatizing birth of her first child. She had an unplanned cesarean section following a lengthy, painful, and unintentionally unmedicated labor. The way she felt after giving birth for a second time, however, was “unlike anything I’ve ever known,” Amanda told Rewire News Group.

The birth itself went smoothly. But afterward, Amanda said, she felt no joy whatsoever and sobbed constantly. She didn’t want to kiss her child or say his name out loud. She would go an entire day without eating, even though her postpartum body had higher nutritional needs than normal.

Alarmed, Amanda brought up her symptoms at her six-week check-up with her OB-GYN. She was prescribed Zoloft, an SSRI that had previously worked for her. This time, it didn’t. After a few more SSRI trials and meetings with different OB-GYN providers, she recalled being told, “I don’t know what else to do for you.”

But there is, in fact, a pill specifically designed to treat postpartum depression. Why didn’t anyone tell Amanda about it?

What is postpartum depression?

Postpartum depression (PPD) affects at least 1 in 8 people nationwide. The brain and body undergo numerous changes after birth that can affect mental health.

One change is hormonal. Estrogen and progesterone plummet after pregnancy.

“Certain women have abnormal mood responses to changing levels of hormones,” psychiatrist Katie Unverferth, Medical Director of the UCLA Maternal Mental Health Program, told RNG in an email. “The large drop in estrogen and progesterone in the postpartum is such a time, and can trigger baby blues or the more severe postpartum depression.”

At the same time, other chemicals in the brain called neurosteroids are rapidly shifting in the postpartum period. These naturally occurring substances act on GABA receptors, which help the brain calm anxiety and help regulate mood. The key neurosteroid during pregnancy is “a very calming neurosteroid” called allopregnanolone, Dr. Sarah Oreck, reproductive psychiatrist and CEO of Mavida Health, told RNG via email.

“Allopregnanolone levels rise dramatically during pregnancy and then drop precipitously after delivery,” Oreck said. “This sudden decline is thought to be one mechanism underlying postpartum depression in vulnerable individuals.”

“PPD tends to be a very anxious depression,” added Unverferth.

People often feel sad and irritable, and experience obsessive thinking—especially disturbing thoughts around accidental harm happening to the infant, she added. A sense of overwhelm tends to be in the PPD mix, too.

Public awareness of PPD got a boost last year with the film Die My Love. The movie, released in November 2025, stars Jennifer Lawrence as a young mother with severe postpartum depression and psychosis. During the press tour for the film, Lawrence spoke openly about her own experience with postpartum anxiety after the birth of her second child. She described a disconnect and guilt around feeling like not being a good mother to her infant son.

“There’s not really anything like postpartum,” she told Variety. “It’s extremely isolating.”

Long road to PPD treatment

Until 2019, there were no confirmed FDA approved treatments for PPD beyond SSRIs, which won’t work for everyone and can take weeks to kick in if they do.

Then, in 2019, came brexanolone, the first-ever treatment approved by the FDA specifically for postpartum depression. While clinical trials suggested that the drug, marketed under the drug name Zulresso, could improve depression symptoms, logistical challenges dramatically limited its use.

Without insurance coverage, brexanolone was estimated to cost $34,000. It also needed to be administered via a 60-hour IV infusion in a hospital—a very long time for a new parent to be separated from their newborn and family.

In August 2023, the FDA approved zuranolone, prescribed under the brand name Zurzuvae, and the manufacturer discontinued brexanolone in 2025.

With her pharmaceutical background, Amanda had actually heard of zuranolone. She used her expertise to research the drug and couldn’t find much information online from other moms who had taken the treatment, even after posting in a social media group of 40,000 moms who are pharmacists.

“I got crickets. Nothing, not a single response,” Amanda said. “No one could give me any insight on what to do, how to obtain it, what it was like, side effects, no one.”

She convinced her psychiatrist to prescribe it anyway.

How zuranolone soothes the postpartum brain

Zuranolone is a synthetic version of allopregnanolone, the neurosteroid that declines post-pregnancy. Typically taken once daily for 14 days, psychiatrists believe that it likely works fast in the brain to restore levels of this mood-regulating neurosteroid, potentially within days.

This allows the nervous system to calm and emotions to stabilize, Oreck explained.

In a manufacturer-funded clinical trial for zuranolone, patients who were given the drug compared to the placebo had lower measures of clinical depression scores. Some saw mood improvement within three days.

Within the first week of taking zuranolone, Amanda said she felt a “hormonal reset.”

“It was like day one of giving birth started that day. I became a mother to my son that day. Because before that, I was not a mother. … I did nothing but keep this child alive for the first three months of his life. But once I took that medicine, it was like, reset,” said Amanda. “Okay, now we can restart our bonding.”

By day around three, her appetite returned. She doesn’t remember the first food she actually enjoyed—it was probably chicken nuggets or the Costco hotdogs that she was also feeding her toddler—but at some point, eating felt normal again.

Appetite loss was also what tipped off Karlee, a mother in Arkansas, that she might have PPD. Karlee spoke with RNG using her first name only to protect her daughter’s privacy.

Karlee had a history of anxiety symptoms that she had managed with prescription medication since adolescence. But when she brought her infant daughter home from the hospital in July 2024, her persistent anxiety became untenable.

“The very first night, I was terrified that she was going to stop breathing in the middle of the night … so I was like, someone has to stay up and stare at her,” Karlee told RNG.

“The anxiety and depression are so overwhelming,” she wrote on July 24, 2024, in a journal she kept to document her postpartum journey, recalling her third day home as “the most scared of my mental health I have ever been in my life.”

This anxiety and panic continued for more than a month. By that point, Karlee became used to her “meltdowns,” as she described them to RNG in an email. Exhaustion seeped into her bones; her milk supply was low. Breastfeeding parents may need to consume 500 additional calories per day, but Karlee said she was not taking in enough food.

Unlike Amanda, Karlee didn’t have to work to discover Zurzuvae; her psychiatrist recommended it immediately. She saw Karlee’s face in a telehealth call and knew something wasn’t right.

Karlee started the treatment about five-and-a-half weeks postpartum. It wasn’t an immediate “magic turning point,” Karlee said. But, slowly, by late summer, she felt herself climbing back to her baseline.

“I still have my moments, but they are manageable,” she remarked in her postpartum journal.

Zurzuvae is not currently FDA-approved to treat other mental health conditions of pregnancy, including postpartum psychosis and postpartum anxiety. Still, given that mental health conditions are a leading cause of death in postpartum and pregnant people in the U.S., the doctors RNG interviewed were willing to take a chance on the drug.

Oreck said she has prescribed the medication for patients with postpartum anxiety symptoms.

“I’m careful to counsel patients that this is an off-label use,” she said. “The medication hasn’t been specifically studied for anxiety in clinical trials, so we don’t have the same robust evidence base as we do for PPD.”

Challenges to widespread adoption

Some 500,000 people in the U.S. are diagnosed with PPD each year. Zurzuvae’s original manufacturer, Sage Therapeutics (later acquired by Supernus Pharmaceuticals), reported that 2,000 Zurzuvae prescriptions were shipped out in the last quarter of 2024, according to a 2025 Psychiatry Online article—up 40 percent from the second quarter of that year.

Those figures still fall well short of the potential market for this drug. If the treatment works, why do so few people use it?

Providers appear to be one part of the story. Initially, some insurance companies required zuranolone be prescribed by a psychiatrist, which experts said dramatically limited access to the drug. In practice, OB-GYNs are the most likely prescribers of any postpartum medication, since they are generally the only providers doing a dedicated postpartum mental health screening—at least for new parents who don’t have an existing psychiatric provider.

Even when an insurance company covers a zuranolone prescription from an OB-GYN, providers’ ability to gauge how someone is faring postpartum based on a series of routine questions is limited. That’s especially true if the doctor-patient relationship is new or if the patient isn’t open about or aware of their mental health challenges.

Karlee felt somewhat uncomfortable discussing her mental health in the sterile environment of her OB-GYN’s office. As a result, at a follow-up appointment two weeks after giving birth, she scored within the normal range on the postpartum mental health screening—even though she was in the throes of postpartum depression.

Unverferth also believes that many providers lack training and education around the medication.

“It is a very new medication that has a very unique way of dosing it,” she said, adding that some mental health providers may not be comfortable prescribing a 14-day dose of a calming, sedating medication.

Other providers—and some patients—could also be leery of Zurzurvae’s sedative nature. After taking a dose, patients cannot drive for 12 hours and may be too sleepy to properly care for an infant overnight. Breastfeeding is not advised during the 14-day treatment course.

These side effects didn’t bother Amanda. She had a supportive partner to pitch in if needed on night feedings, and she woke up nightly at 3 a.m. to feed her son. But she spoke with other moms who’d taken Zurzuvae and said they were too “zonked out” to fully function at night.

Yet as with so many health-care challenges in the United States, the main problem may be insurance, according to a 2025 article in Psychiatry Online about barriers to accessing this “innovative oral pharmacological treatment for postpartum depression.”

Without coverage, Zurzurvae costs about $15,000 for the two-week course.

The Policy Center for Maternal Mental Health reports that insured patients whose plans don’t automatically cover the medication won’t necessarily be shut out from the drug entirely. But they could be required to try other less-expensive treatments first, like SSRIs, delaying their recovery.

Zurzuvae also has a copay assistance program that can help ease the out-of-pocket costs. But it only applies to people who have commercial insurance. That won’t help uninsured PPD sufferers.

Amanda and Karlee understand these barriers, and they’re working to help more people with PPD get treatment. Amanda posts online about her experience with Zurzurvae and invites people to reach out to her with questions. So far, she’s walked two moms through the process of getting prior approval and copay assistance.

Karlee speaks out about zuranolone to any moms who will listen, she said. If doctors aren’t necessarily talking up the drug yet, it falls on patients to educate each other.

“I really wanted to put it out there that women need to trust themselves,” she said.

Many men search why they cannot flirt without feeling cringe after interactions that should have felt light and natural but instead felt forced.

You try to be playful.
You attempt a joke.
You add a teasing comment.

Immediately you feel self conscious.

You hear your own voice.
You analyse your wording.
You regret saying it seconds later.

Afterwards you decide you would rather just be polite next time because at least that feels safe.

This experience is extremely common and it does not come from lacking humour or personality. It comes from a conflict between expression and self monitoring.

Understanding why you cannot flirt without feeling cringe begins with understanding what flirting actually is psychologically.

Flirting is socially uncertain behaviour

Normal conversation follows predictable rules. You exchange information and remain neutral. Flirting deliberately breaks that pattern slightly.

It introduces ambiguity.
It implies interest indirectly.
It invites interpretation.

Your brain treats ambiguity as risk because the response cannot be guaranteed. The moment you attempt flirtation, your attention shifts from interaction to evaluation.

Instead of reacting, you start watching yourself behave.

The cringe feeling is the awareness of performing in real time.

The internal observer activates

When you flirt, your mind splits into two roles.

One part speaks.
The other judges.

Did that sound smooth
Was that awkward
Did she understand the tone
Should I correct it

The observer interrupts the moment before it finishes. Because flirting relies on timing, the interruption creates tension inside you even if she did not perceive anything strange.

You are reacting to your own behaviour rather than hers.

Why normal conversation feels easier

In standard conversation the stakes feel low. You exchange clear meaning. There is little room for interpretation. Your brain does not need to monitor because nothing vulnerable is being expressed.

Flirting reveals interest. Revealing interest exposes you to judgement. Exposure activates self awareness. Self awareness produces the cringe sensation.

So the discomfort is not caused by flirting badly. It is caused by noticing yourself flirting.

The role of imagined evaluation

The moment you try to flirt, your mind imagines how you appear from her perspective.

You picture yourself externally instead of experiencing internally. This mental shift creates distance between intention and expression.

The more vividly you imagine being judged, the stronger the discomfort becomes. The behaviour itself is secondary. The awareness of being seen is primary.

This is why the same line spoken casually can feel natural but deliberately attempting it feels awkward.

Why humour alone does not solve it

Many people believe improving jokes will fix the problem. Better jokes may improve reaction but they do not remove self monitoring.

Even successful flirtation can feel uncomfortable if you are focused on yourself while speaking. Comfort depends on attention placement rather than response outcome.

You are not trying to impress incorrectly. You are trying to control perception during a moment that cannot be controlled.

The behaviours it creates

When you feel cringe while flirting, predictable adjustments appear.

You quickly explain the joke
You soften the comment afterwards
You apologise for teasing
You switch back to safe topics

Each behaviour attempts to repair imagined damage that likely never existed. The interaction becomes less natural because you interrupt your own expression.

She experiences mixed signals while you experience relief for ending the moment.

Why overpreparation makes it worse

Preparing lines increases expectation. Expectation increases pressure. Pressure increases self observation.

Instead of responding to what she said, you check whether the prepared idea fits. The mismatch creates hesitation and hesitation intensifies awkwardness.

Flirting works best when spontaneous because spontaneity leaves no time for the observer to interfere.

The importance of timing

Flirting is less about content and more about timing. A simple playful remark delivered immediately feels natural. The same remark delivered after mental evaluation feels forced.

Your brain attempts to optimise wording but optimisation delays timing. The delay produces the uncomfortable sensation you interpret as failure.

Removing delay reduces discomfort more than improving wording.

Why you remember it afterwards

You replay the moment because the observer remained active after the conversation ended. The brain searches for mistakes to justify the discomfort.

Often you judge the memory more harshly than the reality. The discomfort came from internal monitoring, not from external reaction.

This creates a loop where anticipation of cringe increases the next time you try.

The repeating pattern

You attempt flirtation rarely.
You feel uncomfortable.
You revert to politeness.

Over time you associate flirting with embarrassment even though evidence is minimal. The brain avoids behaviours linked to strong self awareness rather than negative outcomes.

Recognising this pattern explains why the problem persists despite logical understanding.

What changes the experience

The shift happens when you allow expression before evaluation.

Speak slightly sooner than feels ideal.
Do not correct the sentence immediately.
Let the moment finish before analysing.

When reaction precedes judgement, the observer has less influence. The cringe sensation weakens because attention remains outward.

You are not becoming more confident. You are reducing interference.

Why accepting imperfection helps

Flirting is inherently imprecise. Trying to make it precise removes its nature. Accepting minor awkwardness prevents the need to manage perception continuously.

When the mind realises the interaction continues normally despite imperfection, it reduces monitoring automatically.

Comfort grows from repeated unedited moments.

Practising outside attraction

You can practise playful comments in low pressure environments. The goal is not reaction but tolerance of expression.

By speaking without immediate evaluation, you train your brain that social exposure is manageable. The observer becomes quieter through repetition rather than reasoning.

Long term change

Eventually the delay between thought and speech shortens. Flirting begins to feel similar to ordinary conversation because the same mental process occurs.

The difference disappears not because flirting became safe but because you stopped supervising yourself while doing it.

Final thought

Feeling cringe while flirting does not mean you are bad at it. It means you are watching yourself too closely during a behaviour that requires presence.

When you allow the moment to exist before judging it, discomfort fades quickly and natural expression returns.

If this keeps happening and you want help becoming relaxed during interactions instead of analysing them afterwards, you can apply for one to one coaching and work directly on real conversations.

Something extraordinary is happening in July and time is genuinely running out for you to be part of it.

For the very first time in Stitch history, we are holding a global conference. Not a local meetup. Not a regional get-together. A vital, three-day international event bringing Stitchers from the US, Australia, Canada, Ireland, the UK and around the world together in one of the most beautiful cities on earth: Bath, England.

We are calling it Stitch Together 2026, and it is already close to sold out.

Right now, there are only 14 spots remaining. Once they are gone, they are gone. We will not be adding more capacity. If you have been thinking about whether this is for you, I want to encourage you to stop thinking and start booking. This will be one of the most memorable weekends many of us have ever shared.

I can’t wait to meet you in person!

Sweet friends, we can no longer sugarcoat this issue; we must face the devastating and alarming statistics that increasingly show just how damaging artificial intelligence is to our relationships. More importantly, how “these systems” that are mimicking human likeness and thoughts are slowly destroying our marriages!

The Stats Are In, and It’s Concerning!

According to a marriage survey on Marriages.com, 33% of married couples felt that AI tools understood the nature of their marital problems better than their spouse. Even more, after using AI, 44% felt calmer and 38% felt more confident. In addition to this survey, 28% have used AI to make financial decisions and have turned to AI for advice on specific issues regarding their marriage before even talking to their spouse.

Gen Z and Millennials seem to be the most active users, some even seeking AI for companionship, moral support, and other needs that should be fulfilled within a marriage, according to the Institute of Family Studies.

If these statistics weren’t concerning enough, the truth is that faith-based and long-term marriages are not immune. In fact, the rise in technology, along with its easy accessibility, has shown that even the strongest of couples are falling into the negative trap of AI.

Is AI All Bad?

Not necessarily. In short, if AI is used responsibly and appropriately, it can be a helpful resource and effective way to reduce stress, manage schedules, offer creative outlets, and more. The key takeaway is that AI must be used with healthy boundaries, intentionality, and on purpose.

Healthy boundaries include setting time limits on using the tool, not relying solely on it for emotional or mental support, creating privacy settings to avoid inappropriate content, and setting it to “do not disturb” or “no phone use” during prime time for conversations, such as the dinner table.

Being intentional and purposeful of our time with AI is invaluable. It’s ever so easy to scroll or chat away with various systems without a second thought, but we must be mindful of “why” and “what” we are seeking when we are using these devices. In other words, if you find you are mindlessly connecting with AI and don’t necessarily know “why,” it may be time to set it down and walk away.

Sneaky Ways AI Is Damaging Marriages

Sure, AI isn’t all bad, and we can put safeguards in place to protect our hearts, minds, and marriages. But we can’t turn a blind eye to the sneaky (and rather clever) way AI can blur the line between healthy and unhealthy use, essentially driving a wedge between a faithful husband and wife.

Just keep in mind Exodus 20:3, which states that we should have no other gods (idols) above God. Yes, that includes our handheld devices, “virtual” assistants, digital experts, and all the tech and science that seemingly simulates humans. The harsh reality is that when technology takes over our marriage, and we turn to it more than we turn to each other (and more importantly, before we turn to God), we are disobeying our heavenly Father.

As we dive into three ways AI is sneaking into our marriages and wreaking havoc, pause to reflect, respond, and remember that prayer is paramount. If you are struggling with any of the issues below, seek God through repentance and soften your heart to receive His wisdom, counsel, and guidance.

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In today’s evolving professional landscape, situationship culture is no longer limited to dating — it’s influencing how women entrepreneurs approach commitment in business, partnerships, and long-term growth. The rise of ambiguous, low-commitment dynamics has reshaped expectations around loyalty, flexibility, and accountability.

For women building ventures, this cultural shift can either create blurred boundaries or sharpen discernment. From unclear partnerships to undefined collaborations, the parallels between modern dating culture and entrepreneurship are striking.

In this article, we explore eight ways situationship culture shapes women entrepreneurs’ commitment to career and business growth, and how leading founders are redefining commitment on their own terms to build stronger, more sustainable companies.

• Reject Half Measures and Uphold Standards
• Define Terms and Demand Reciprocity
• Choose Commitment With Discernment and Guardrails
• Enforce Explicit Mutual Agreements
• Institute Structure to Drive Results
• Start With Low-Pressure Connections
• Set Clear Goals and Limits
• Establish Boundaries and Expectations Early

Reject Half Measures and Uphold Standards

As a woman entrepreneur, I often find myself in situationship culture, which is more situation-oriented and decisive on long-term commitment, whether it is in business partnerships or business growth development, instead of floating in vagueness and low-commitment arrangements.

Situationship culture focuses on flexibility and keeping options open and not labeling and fully investing until one feels the situation is right, reflects how most contemporary professionals approach jobs or ventures — as a temporary exploration, but not one to commit to. This has been reflected in the larger culture, where individual autonomy and personal development have become the main focus of people, rather than the traditional loyalty similar to that in dating.

This has had a reverse effect in my business, where it motivated me to discard the concept of business situationships. At the beginning, I had tried to find quite ambiguous partners: they were suppliers who failed to deliver on time, potential investors who needed contributions but would not deposit capital, or consultants who regarded work as a job on the side without being considered serious. These were romantic situationships in terms of an emotional investment without commitment of both parties, and this resulted in time wastage and halted development.

Seeing that situationships tend to have one party (in most cases, women) over-invested and the other party remains calm, I applied this lesson to my profession: now, I insist on clarity and reciprocity in the beginning. My 40-artisan team, mostly women, who work with flexible hours to be empowered, is not composed of loose arrangements, but established expectations of regular work, good pay, and respect for one another. I do not work with the partners or vendors towards the direction of where it goes, but rather towards specified terms, timelines, and common objectives.

Sustainable entrepreneurship entails a prolonged effort, risk, and trust. Ambiguity slows down the impact, in particular, by assisting vulnerable women artisans who require stability. My complete dedication to compatible individuals and avoiding half-baked relationships has helped me build a stronger, value-based company that brings actual change in the community and sustainable luxury.

The Situationship culture has shown me the half-commitment appearance — I will never accept it in my profession. Honest dedication and commitment create stronger roots and quicker development.

Anjali Singh, Owner, Aksstagga

Define Terms and Demand Reciprocity

“Situationship culture” — the rise of ambiguous, non-committal dynamics — has quietly shaped how many women approach not just relationships, but work. For me, it sharpened my clarity around reciprocal commitment. In a world that increasingly romanticizes flexibility and open-endedness, I’ve learned to become more intentional about defining the terms of any business relationship, partnership, or opportunity. Because just like in dating, too much vagueness in entrepreneurship can lead to burnout: you’re investing your time, talent, and energy into something (or someone) that’s not investing back.

Early in my entrepreneurial journey, I said yes to everything. I entertained collaborations without contracts, offered free strategy sessions “just to see where it leads,” and waited too long for others to follow through on vague promises. It felt exciting at first — like I was staying open to possibilities. But over time, I realized I was recreating the same emotional fatigue I’d felt in personal “situationships”: over-giving, under-acknowledged, and always waiting for the other shoe to drop. It wasn’t just draining — it was unsustainable. That’s when I started applying the same mindset I’d been learning in therapy to my business: name what you want, notice who matches it, and move accordingly.

A powerful example came when a larger brand approached me about a “strategic partnership.” They loved my work, they said. They wanted to “co-create content,” “support each other’s growth,” and “see where things go.” But they were vague about timelines, equity, or shared ownership. A year earlier, I might’ve jumped in. But now, I paused and asked for clear terms: What would success look like for both of us? What’s the scope? Who decides? Their hesitation told me everything.

A study published in Harvard Business Review found that women founders are significantly more likely to face “ambiguous offers” than their male counterparts — vague funding promises, informal mentorship arrangements, or undefined advisory roles. These open loops, the study found, often lead to emotional and strategic exhaustion. What made the difference for successful founders wasn’t saying yes to every opportunity — it was learning to define commitment early and hold firm boundaries.

So yes, situationship culture has influenced me — but not by making me jaded. It made me discerning. In love and in leadership, clarity is kindness. Today, I build with people and partners who are all in — or not in at all.

Miriam Groom, CEO, Mindful Career Counselling

Choose Commitment With Discernment and Guardrails

After 22 years working in the aerospace industry, I’ve come to view my relationship with work much like a long-term partnership. In my early career, there was a sense of romance, a desire to please, to prove myself, and to give everything to the relationship. Over time, however, I experienced what many relationships face when communication, understanding, and empathy break down: moments of distance, frustration, and misalignment.

There were periods where the differences felt significant enough that I considered walking away. But with maturity, and perspective shaped by witnessing my parents’ 40-plus-year marriage; I learned an important lesson: not every difference is personal, and not every challenge is a signal to leave. You grow to see situations for what they are, rather than what you hoped they would be.

“Situationship culture” has reinforced this mindset in my entrepreneurial journey. It taught me to be intentional about commitment, to stay engaged without losing myself, to set boundaries, and to consciously choose when to stay and when to walk away. That clarity has become a form of protection, allowing me to build my career and business with resilience, discernment, and self-respect.

Natalie Grant, Founder & CEO, Caribbean Connector

Enforce Explicit Mutual Agreements

Situationship culture sharpened my intolerance for ambiguity.

Early in my career, I said yes to things that were loosely defined — roles without authority, partnerships without accountability, clients without alignment. I told myself it was “optional,” “flexible,” or “just for now.” In reality, it was professional limbo. No clear commitments. No shared standards. And, no ownership on either side.

Situationship culture normalized that kind of vagueness. And for women entrepreneurs especially, it can be appealing. We’re taught to be agreeable, adaptable, grateful for the opportunity — so we linger longer than we should in arrangements that don’t fully choose us.

The shift came when I realized clarity is not rigidity — it’s respect.

Now, my approach to commitment is explicit and mutual. If I’m building something, I want clean lines: defined outcomes, decision rights, timelines, and consequences. I commit deeply — but only where there’s reciprocity and adult-level ownership on both sides.

That discipline has changed everything. My business is leaner, stronger, and more durable because I no longer build with one foot in and one foot out — mine or anyone else’s. I don’t chase potential. I partner with intention.

Situationship culture taught me this by contrast: ambiguity drains energy, erodes trust, and delays progress. Commitment, done well, creates momentum.

For me, the most strategic move I ever made as a woman entrepreneur was deciding I don’t do “almost.” I do aligned. I do chosen. And I do clear.

Nancy Capistran, Executive Coach (PCC) + Board Director (IBDC.D) | Award-Winning International Author, Capistran Leadership

Institute Structure to Drive Results

A key insight from navigating my company’s early growth was learning to avoid “situationship” thinking in business partnerships. Initially, informal collaborations with suppliers and marketing partners led to unclear expectations, and only 42% of projects were completed on time. Recognizing this pattern, clear agreements and defined roles became non-negotiable, even for short-term or trial partnerships.

After implementing this structure, project completion jumped to 87.6%, and timelines were consistently met. This shift influenced the broader approach to the business: every relationship — whether with a partner, investor, or team member — requires clarity, commitment, and accountability.

Treating business relationships with intentionality, rather than casual flexibility, ensures that the company can scale without friction while protecting time and energy for strategic priorities. The lesson extends beyond efficiency; it builds trust, reliability, and a culture where ambition is matched by responsibility, allowing us to grow steadily while maintaining high standards for every collaboration.

Aastha Kapoor, Founder, Sy’a teas

Start With Low-Pressure Connections

Situationship culture has encouraged me to start with flexible, low-pressure connections and let commitment grow as alignment becomes clear. I reach out on social media to women in similar roles to build a support circle focused on mutual learning without strict give-and-take. This keeps early commitments light while we build trust and clarity, which leads to stronger long-term partnerships.

Ashley Kenny, Co-Founder, Heirloom Video Books

Set Clear Goals and Limits

One way “situationship culture” has influenced my approach is that it’s taught me to value clarity and intentionality in every commitment I make — especially in my business. I’ve learned not to overcommit or spread myself too thin; instead, I focus on clearly defined goals, responsibilities, and timelines. Just as situationships can leave relationships ambiguous, vague commitments in business can lead to confusion, burnout, or missed opportunities.

This mindset works because it helps me protect my energy and ensure that every investment — whether time, resources, or partnerships — aligns with my long-term vision. By approaching my career with the same intentionality I value in relationships, I build trust with clients, my team, and myself, creating a solid foundation for sustainable growth rather than leaving success to chance.

Keagan Stapley, Owner, NYC Meal Prep

Establish Boundaries and Expectations Early

Influenced by the “situationship culture,” I now value creating boundaries and clear mutual expectations of myself and others at the outset of every new project or endeavor. I have learned to approach my career with the same intent as I would a significant relationship.

In the early years of my career, I would often sign up for projects, partnerships, or roles that were ambiguous in terms of their scope and/or the level of commitment required of me. My fear of “rocking the boat” or missing out on an opportunity caused me to act thoughtlessly in this regard, which resulted in misaligned expectations, wasted time and effort, and ultimately, frustration. I eventually came to understand that having clarity at the outset can help to mitigate burnout and build trust.

By outlining clear expectations and roles from day one of any project (client engagement, team collaboration, or strategic partnership), I ensure that everyone involved knows where they stand so that I can invest my time, energy, and momentum into initiatives that will drive the business forward.

Ambiguity is expensive in relationships, as well as in an entrepreneurial context. When I engage one-on-one with people, or when I partner with others for entrepreneurial reasons, I do so with the utmost transparency, intention, and care for the time, energy, and momentum of both parties involved.

Erin Friez, President, Digital Wealth Partners

Conclusion: Commitment Is the New Competitive Advantage

Situationship culture has made one thing clear: ambiguity may feel modern, but clarity builds momentum.

For women entrepreneurs, the lesson isn’t to become rigid — it’s to become intentional. Whether it’s setting explicit agreements, defining timelines, demanding reciprocity, or walking away from half-commitments, today’s founders are choosing alignment over ambiguity.

In a culture that often glorifies keeping options open, women entrepreneurs are proving that discernment, structure, and intentional commitment are not limitations — they’re leadership strengths.

Because in business, just like in life, “almost” rarely builds anything lasting.

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