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Category: Humor

Humor | ReportWire publishes the latest breaking U.S. and world news, trending topics and developing stories from around globe.

  • Meet A Nightmare From British Children's TV

    Meet A Nightmare From British Children's TV

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    “In the UK we had a TV ‘personality’ called Mr Blobby. My father rented a Blobby costume for my school fair and after trying it on for the first time tripped and fell down the stairs, splitting the suit on the bottom in doing so. Yes that’s me at the bottom of the stairs blissfully unaware of what was hurtling toward me.”

    (submitted by Chloe)

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    Team Awkward

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  • AI Hoiman: No More Two Party System – Ted Holland, Humor Times

    AI Hoiman: No More Two Party System – Ted Holland, Humor Times

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    Dispatches From SNN (Slobovian News Network)

    The AI candidate Hoiman says we should get rid of political parties altogether.

    Presidential candidate Artificial Ignorance Entity Hoiman says that the American system has ground to a halt because Congress is a joke. Further, Hoiman says today’s political parties are like two three-year-olds fighting over a lollipop.

    Artificial Ignorance Entity Hoiman
    Still from the movie, “A.I. Artificial Intelligence” (2001).

    “It’s time to get rid of political parties and elections as we now know them,” said Hoiman. “Because of the corrupt parties, nothing gets done on the local, state or federal government levels.”

    He states that the political process in the Democratic Republic of Pepperbutte is an improvement over the current US political system. “The people run the government of DRP. There are no political parties, no elections and no professional politicians,” he said.

    Hoiman explained that most Americans are unfamiliar with Pepperbutte. “It has a population of 7 million people and is the world’s largest exporter of organic digital condoms and ass wax,” he said.

    Since there are no political parties in Pepperbutte, citizens are drafted to fill public offices. Those between the ages of 18 and 30 are selected to serve one year in the Pepperbuttean military corps. Taxpayers and property owners between the ages of 30 and 60 are selected to serve on town counsels, state assemblies and the national congress. Once you serve your four year term you cannot serve another term.

    Pepperbutte has no political campaigns and no elections. Mayors, governors and the vice chancellor are picked from within the group draftees.

    This works for Pepperbutte and could work for America, Hoiman says. “I am looking forward to running against and matching wits with Donald Trump,” he added.

    SNN Words to Live By

    “Everything is beautiful in its own way” — Ray Stevens, “Everything is Beautiful,” 1970 song.

    “Don’t confuse feeling good with being good.” — writer James Fixx.

    Ted HollandTed Holland
    Latest posts by Ted Holland (see all)
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    Ted Holland

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  • Bradley Cooper Under Scrutiny For Not Allowing Actors To Sit On Chairs On The Set Of “Maestro”

    Bradley Cooper Under Scrutiny For Not Allowing Actors To Sit On Chairs On The Set Of “Maestro”

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    Bradley Cooper has received some backlash after revealing that he didn’t provide seats to his employees when he worked as a film director.

    The 48-year-old actor has been promoting the second movie that he both directed and starred in, Maestro. He had initially received critical acclaim after making his directorial debut with A Star Is Born, in 2018.

    Speaking to Spike Lee for Variety’s Directors on Directors series, Bradley explained that he doesn’t have any chairs on set because he believes they cause “energy dips.”

    Bradley Cooper recently revealed that he doesn’t have any chairs on set because he believes they cause “energy dips”

    Image credits: Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/Getty Images

    Recalling the times some filmmakers had recognized Bradley’s capacity to “think in terms of the whole”, and therefore assisting at times closely behind the camera, he explained: “For me, it was such a natural transition, once I had the courage to write and direct a movie.

    “But when I direct, I don’t watch playback. There’s no chairs. I’ve always hated chairs on sets; your energy dips the minute you sit down in a chair. There’s no video village.”

    The star opened up about his experience acting and directing on his latest film, “Maestro,” which centers around the life of composer Leonard Bernstein

    Image credits: imdb

    Many people took offense to the interview, with some saying that Bradley’s rules on set were “ableist”, referring to the discrimination and social prejudice against people with physical or mental disabilities.

    As a result, The Hangover star’s quotes were shared on X (formerly known as Twitter), sparking outrage, as a person wrote: “I think every single person on set should get a provided chair, not just cast/video village because working 12 hour+ days without being allowed to sit down is inhumane.”

    “I’ve always hated chairs on sets; your energy dips the minute you sit down in a chair,” Bradley explained in a Variety interview

    Image credits: Netflix: Behind the Streams

    Another X user commented: “Sorry but even completely able-bodied people are not performing at their artistic best when they’ve been standing for 14 hours.”

    A separate individual chimed in: “For Bradley Cooper and everyone else who needs to to [sic] hear it, you get the best work out of folks when they feel safe, included, and their needs are met. If you have to create harsh conditions to get people to work, you are simply not good at leading. It’s a skill issue.”

    Image credits: Netflix: Behind the Streams

    An additional person echoed the same views and penned: “I understand the artistic reasons not to have a video village and fully support that. But let the people sit, man. They work hard for you.

    “They stand most of the time. We all know there is downtime on film sets no matter how efficiently you shoot. Let the people sit.”

    Bradley spoke to Spike Lee for Variety’s Directors on Directors series

    Image credits: Variety

    Other irritated online readers point to the newly published video footage of the interview, which shows Bradley joking about sitting on “apple boxes” instead of a chair.

    The comment, which ultimately suggests that sitting down isn’t banned in its entirety, was not included in the write-up of the interview.

    On X, a person highlighted Bradley’s comment and wrote: “Yeah apple boxes are not a very nice way to sit. If you work a set for 12 hours you should be able to have breaks and sit down comfortably.”

    He also revealed that he didn’t allow Bernstein’s children to be present on set

    Image credits: Variety

    Meanwhile, on YouTube, the interview was well received by viewers as a person commented: “Just wonderful to see Bradley’s passion and work ethic in this interview. looking forward to him building an amazing body of work and getting a special lifetime Oscar at 60.”

    Bradley has received a total of nine Oscar nominations at the Academy Awards but has never won any so far.

    Maestro, which is now playing in select theaters before streaming on Netflix on December 20, centers around the life and career of composer Leonard Bernstein. It also recounts his relationship with his wife, Felicia Montealegre Bernstein.

    You can watch the interview below:

    According to Buzzfeed, Bradley worked closely with Leonard and Felicia’s children during the making of the film but has been open about the strict boundaries that he had on set.

    As well as forbidden chairs, Bradley also admitted that although he allowed the children to read over his scripts and have an input in how their parents would be portrayed on screen, he didn’t allow them to be present for any of the filming.

    In the interview for Variety, the filmmaker said: “When we shoot the movie, no one’s allowed on set,” before clarifying that producer Steven Spielberg was the only exception.

    Bradley further explained: “Steven Spielberg came three times, but other than him, there’s nobody. It has to be a sanctuary.”

    Many people reacted negatively to Bradley’s comments

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    [ad_2] Donata Leskauskaite
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  • Awkward Family Photos, Generated by Artificial Intelligence

    Awkward Family Photos, Generated by Artificial Intelligence

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    What happens when you ask AI to create one of those famous awkward family photos? It inserts pugs, fictional creatures, creepy uncles and little girls with a mustache. Scroll down and enjoy the finest examples!

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    Awkward family photo, generated by AI.

    The post Awkward Family Photos, Generated by Artificial Intelligence first appeared on Crazy Funny Pictures.

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    liver

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  • A Reckless Driver

    A Reckless Driver

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    For a variety of reasons, Robert‘s company needed to ship a small linux box with a USB ethernet adapter. The driver for said adapter was giving him some issues with their setup, but fortunately the driver was open source, so Robert could at least try and diagnose the problems.

    In the file inst.c, he found this:

    #include <stdio.h>
    
    main()
    {
    	
    system("mkdir /usr/lib/smm9431");
    system("cp scm9431.ko  /usr/lib/smm9431");
    system("insmod scm9431.ko");
    system("touch /tmp/nprtmp");
    system("grep -v 'cd /usr/lib/smm9431' /etc/rc.d/rc.local > /tmp/nprtmp");
    system("cp /tmp/nprtmp /etc/rc.d/rc.local > /dev/null 2>&1");
    system("rm -f /tmp/nprtmp > /dev/null 2>&1");
    system("echo 'cd /usr/lib/smm9431' >> /etc/rc.d/rc.local");
    system("ln -s /etc/rc.d/rc.local /etc/rc.local > /dev/null 2>&1");
    system("chmod 755 /etc/rc.d/rc.local");
    
    system("touch /tmp/nprtmp");
    system("grep -v smmdriver /etc/rc.d/rc.local > /tmp/nprtmp");
    system("cp /tmp/nprtmp /etc/rc.d/rc.local > /dev/null 2>&1");
    system("rm -f /tmp/nprtmp > /dev/null 2>&1");
    system("echo 'insmod scm9431.ko ' >> /etc/rc.d/rc.local");
    system("ln -s /etc/rc.d/rc.local /etc/rc.local > /dev/null 2>&1");
    system("chmod 755 /etc/rc.d/rc.local");
    
    }
    

    This is, of course, a shell script with extra steps. The call to system is just a call to the shell to luanch new processes to execute each step. I do not know why it was done this way.

    Even once we get past “you wrote your shell script in C”, the whole thing is a bit weird. It’s worth noting that this was about a decade ago, so it made more sense that this was designed for SystemV’s init architecture.

    It starts fine- make a directory, copy our kernel module into the tirectory, an insmod it. Then we touch a file because we’re going to redirect output to it. We take rc.local an find every line that isn’t cd /usr/lib/smm9431, and pipe it to that temp file. Then we copy that file right back over rc.local just so we can… echo that line in again.

    It’s not useless, as it ensures that the cd is the last line. Then we repeat this process to remove any lines containing smmdriver (probably an old version) and put an insmod at the end- ensuring that our rc.local script will load the driver on next boot.

    Now, at this point in my life, I’ve been infected by the systemd brainworms, and have forgotten most of the SysV configuration, but most distros let you have rdN.d directories, where N is the runlevel you want the script to run at, and drivers can just create a script at that runlevel- they don’t need to munge your rc.local to make this happen. I don’t really love all the ways in which this mucks with your rc.local file.

    Which, there’s a huge difference between this and a shell script. In a shell script, if a command fails, the script stops. Here, if a command fails, system() returns the exit status of the command- an exit status we are not checking here. While it’s unlikely, there’s a world where the touch works, the grep fails, and then we copy an empty file back over rc.local.

    [Advertisement]
    Keep the plebs out of prod. Restrict NuGet feed privileges with ProGet. Learn more.

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    Remy Porter

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  • Paria diving tragedy

    Paria diving tragedy

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    Tags: random, sad, horror, scary

    9365 points, 592 comments.

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  • Mike Luckovich for Dec 17, 2023 – Mike Luckovich, Humor Times

    Mike Luckovich for Dec 17, 2023 – Mike Luckovich, Humor Times

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    Mike Luckovich of the Atlanta Constitution received two amazing honors in 2006, winning both a Pulitzer Prize and the Reuben award for Outstanding Cartoonist of the Year. This was the second Pulitzer for Luckovich; his first was awarded in 1995. He had previously received the Reuben award for Editorial Cartooning in 2001, but this was his first time to be named the overall outstanding cartoonist by a group of his peers. The Reuben awards are distributed each year by the National Cartoonists Society and are considered professional cartooning’s highest honor.

    Impressive as these achievements are, they are only the latest in a long line of awards for Luckovich. He was a runner-up for the Pulitzer in 1987 before garnering the 1995 win.  In 1989, he won the Overseas Press Club’s award for the “Best Cartoons on Foreign Affairs for 1989,” and in 1991, he was awarded the National Headliners award for editorial cartoonists. In 1994, a Luckovich cartoon was selected by voters in a Newsweek magazine poll as one of the four best editorial cartoons of the year.

    After freelancing and selling life insurance to make ends meet following his graduation from the University of Washington in 1982, Luckovich landed his first cartooning job at the Greenville News in South Carolina. After nine months at the News, Luckovich was hired by The Times-Picayune in New Orleans, where he stayed for four years before moving on to Atlanta.

    Luckovich’s cartoons, syndicated nationally by Creators Syndicate, appear in more than 350 daily publications, including The Washington Post,The San Diego Union-Tribune, The Denver Post, Newsday, New York Post, The Cleveland Plain-Dealer, The Dallas Morning News, the Boston Globe, the Seattle Times, the Los Angeles Times, the Chicago Tribune, the Nashville Tennessean and the Houston Chronicle, and are reprinted regularly in Time, Newsweek and the New York Times.

    Luckovich and his wife, Margo, have four children. His hobbies include exercising and collecting unique ties.

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    Mike Luckovich

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  • David Caruso 2012 / 2023

    David Caruso 2012 / 2023

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    Tags: csi, David Caruso

    4538 points, 352 comments.

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  • Big Guy Is Fed Up With ‘Karens’ Using Him To Scare Misbehaving Children, So He Turns The Tables

    Big Guy Is Fed Up With ‘Karens’ Using Him To Scare Misbehaving Children, So He Turns The Tables

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    Being kind to strangers sounds like a no-brainer. However, you’d be surprised by how rude and callous some people can be to folks they don’t personally know. Unfortunately, instead of setting clear expectations for behavior in public upfront, some parents use bigger people to put their misbehaving kids in place.

    Redditor u/A_Nameless, who is 6’3″ (190.5 centimeters) tall and weighs 230 pounds (104 kilograms), recently went viral on r/TrueOffMyChest after sharing how people use his size to scare their kids. It’s something that definitely isn’t okay. Read on for the full story and the internet’s reactions.  Bored Panda reached out to the author of the viral story, and he was kind enough to share his thoughts with us on good parenting. You’ll find our interview with u/A_Nameless as you scroll down.

    Some parents choose to frighten their children into behaving ‘properly’

    Image credits: Vinicius “amnx” Amano / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    One man recently vented online about how he’s chosen as a negative example for folks to scare their kids

    Image credits: Keira Burton / pexels (not the actual photo)

    Image credits: A_Nameless

    Scaring your kids with random strangers is the wrong way to go about parenting, but it happens quite often

    Image credits: Caleb Woods / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    We wanted to get the author’s opinion on why so many parents seem to think that it’s okay to use strangers as negative examples to scare their children. “I think that, at the end of the day, most of us on some level want to be a friend to our child. As such, it’s hard to be the bearer of bad news,” u/A_Nameless told Bored Panda.

    “Now sure, there’s situations in which virtually all parents tend to own up and realize that it’s their responsibility but with a non-negligible number of people, there’s a very real awareness of the fact that, if we can make someone else the bad guy, why not? I think that’s very much the same reason that we often wait for a kid with a chip on his shoulder and a mission to tell our kids about Santa as they grow up instead of telling them ourselves,” he shared his take on things.

    We were curious what the right response would be if someone were to be used as a negative example for some stranger’s kids. Redditor u/A_Nameless said that the right thing to do “is to own it.”

    “The thing about using a stranger as your big bad guy is that you are seldom going to run into the same stranger twice so you’re re-establishing a new bad guy each time all while helping foment a general distrust for society as a whole in the process,” he said.

    “Your child is going to be much more responsive to knowing that they’re disappointing someone who, while may be their own antagonist in the existing scenario, is a permanent fixture in their life.”

    Pointing to a stranger in public and then using them as a ‘negative’ example to scare your kids is a very cheap way to get them to behave. It effectively boils down to using fear to get a quick response, instead of communicating about the misbehavior in the first place.

    Research shows that authoritative parenting is most likely the healthiest approach to raising children. It’s the perfect blend of firmness, openness, love, and support. Authoritative parents work to set healthy boundaries for their children’s behavior; however, they make the rules and expectations incredibly clear. They’re assertive but calm, disciplined but loving, open and fair.

    With that transparency in mind, they also communicate with their kids about why some rules have to exist and why some behaviors will have bad consequences. These parents aim to take their kids’ thoughts and feelings into account, without giving into their whims.

    Children raised in authoritative households grow up responsible, happy, and successful, as well as comfortable expressing their thoughts, standing up for themselves, and making sound decisions.

    How parents react to their kids’ behavior in public reveals a lot about their values priorities

    Image credits: Jordan Whitt / unsplash (not the actual photo)

    If your kid is misbehaving in a public setting, like a grocery store, how you handle the situation will say a lot about your parenting strategy. There are 4 main ones.

    For example, neglectful parents might ignore the tantrum altogether, unconcerned about what’s going on. Permissive parents might let their kids misbehave because “kids will be kids,” or they might give in to the tantrum and try to win them over with sweets or gifts or other promises.

    Authoritarian parents would likely be harsh and yell, subtly threaten, or simply drag their kids out of the store. They might even point to some random person who looks vaguely ‘threatening’ and use them to scare them.

    Authoritative parents, however, would see the situation as a learning opportunity. They would talk to their child about what’s happening, how their behavior is affecting others, and explain the consequences that would follow if they don’t stop their tantrum. It’s this willingness to communicate in uncomfortable situations that makes all the difference.

    It’s best to communicate with your child and set clear expectations upfront

    Image credits: Kindel Media / pexels (not the actual photo)

    Verywell Family suggests that parents make certain expectations clear for their kids before they all leave their homes and head into a public setting. That means explaining that there shouldn’t be any reckless running or random screaming, that they shouldn’t touch random items for sale, that they should hold your hand when crossing the street, etc.

    What sounds common sense to us, adults, may not be that for kids. They need explicit instructions beforehand. They also need to be aware of the consequences that their (mis)behavior will have.

    It’s incredibly useful that you explain why these rules are necessary and why the consequences that you’ve outlined will occur. Having no rules at all would likely lead to chaos in public. Meanwhile, not explaining the rules might leave the children confused and resentful.

    As Verywell Family points out, “Kids do better when they know exactly what to expect and what’s expected of them.” On the flip side, they tend to have a lot of difficulty dealing with surprises.

    Bored Panda asked the OP about the healthy way for parents to react when their children misbehave. The redditor told us that it’s best to be proactive in these sorts of situations. “Help your kid better manage their feelings in advance so that they can monitor their own feelings.” However, in reality, this is easier said than done.

    “I think the most appropriate reaction at those boiling points in which it can’t be contained by forethought is disappointment,” u/A_Nameless said that he’s personally met with a number of child psychologists who have explained how disappointment is a far better reaction than anger or aggression.

    “First off, it [disappointment] is a much better-moderated emotion. It’s one that can be conveyed without lashing out or contributing to a scene yourselves. This helps on multiple levels in that the child will often match your energy to at least some degree if you’re adequate at it and also, at the end of the day, there is a societal and damn-near intrinsic need to please our parents,” the OP shared with us.

    “I know that it was a running joke in virtually every media format for some years that the words, ‘I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed’ were considerably more damning than any lashing out might be.”

    Many readers wanted to share their reactions, as well as similar stories

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  • John Deering for Dec 16, 2023 – John Deering, Humor Times

    John Deering for Dec 16, 2023 – John Deering, Humor Times

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    John Deering is chief editorial cartoonist for the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, the state’s largest newspaper. Five times a week, his cartoon comments entertain (or sometimes enrage) readers throughout Arkansas, in Washington, D.C., and across the country.

    Winner of the National Press Foundation’s 1997 Berryman Award, Deering also gained top honors in the 1994 national John Fischetti Cartoon Competition and was the seven-time winner of the Arkansas Press Association’s Best Editorial Cartoonist award.

    Deering’s work is collected in two books: Deering’s State of Mind (1990) and We Knew Bill Clinton … Bill Clinton Was a Friend of Ours (1993, with Vic Harville). He is a 14-year member of the American Association of Editorial Cartoonists.

    Born in 1956 in Little Rock, Deering has been drawing since his childhood fascination with science fiction and dinosaurs — subjects he made into comic books. After studying art with Truman Alston, Deering focused on commercial and fine art at the University of Arkansas at Little Rock. Along the way, he found his strength in interlocking art with comment.

    At the Democrat-Gazette, Deering advanced from layout artist to editorial cartoonist in 1981-82. His promotion to chief editorial cartoonist in 1988 made his cartoons the state’s best-known. Deering also creates the comic panel Too Much Coffee.

    He and his wife, Kathy, have a daughter and two sons, and live in Little Rock. He still draws dinosaurs.

    Check out his comic strips, Zack Hill and Strange Brew.

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    John Deering

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  • Aww damn, I love lemonade

    Aww damn, I love lemonade

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    Tags: lemons, of, death

    7103 points, 551 comments.

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  • 45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along

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    Rumour about a local businessman who tried to end it all and was rescued. Some weeks later he ran into a burning building and rescued two young children, sustaining severe burns in the process.

    A few months ago I saw him in the pub on the green, all of the skin in his face and hands had melted and he had skin grafted everywhere.

    Happiest man in the pub. What a hero.

    wailingghost , erictompkins Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along US Midwest. Rumor has it that way up the old road out of town, somewhere in the woods, was a satanic cult that held seances and other mystical rituals by firelight. Scared the w*****s out of us kids, and our parents wouldn’t let us ride our bikes anywhere on that road. Decades later I was working on a commissioned history project for the town and talked to the old man who owned the oldest homestead in the county–way back in the woods along that road. While photographing the creek that ran through the stone foundation basement of the home, which the settlers used for water generations ago, I noted the burned out tea candles everywhere. Guy lit up and said yeah, back in his younger days he and his wife used to host elaborate costume parties at the property, often by candlelight for the fun of it. He’d heard the rumors of the satanic cult and thought it was hilarious, so he and his friends ran with it and held parties in monks robes and had bonfires and lived it up. He still laughs about it, and now, so can I!

    shiggyhardlust , worldsbetweenlines Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along Grew up in a rural area of the southwest in the 80’s. There was an older woman with a thick European accent, she lived alone in a small house and was always nice to us kids. She was the only person who gave out full size candy bars during Halloween (that was a big deal back in the 80’s). But she also drank…heavily, like crashed her car a few times around town but not at fast speed (an old huge Ford LTD and not at fast speeds), and the sheriff’s always just took her home.

    Rumors spread amongst us kids that it was strange the way our parents/ adults acted around her. One day in the small local store I was standing in line with my dad and she was standing behind us, I was about 8, I looked back and said to my Dad “that’s the lady that gives out full size Hersey candy bars on Halloween!” She smiled, my father turned and thanked her and looked at her arm, he looked spooked, then he quickly offered her to go ahead of us in line thanking her again. Side note my family’s Catholic.

    When we got in the car I asked him about the woman, he then explained “those numbers tattooed on her arm,” he paused “what have you learned about WWII?” He then tried the entire ride home and later at home to explain the horrors of the holocaust to a 8 year old kid. It made sense why all the adults always treated her with a different type of respect. Even the Sheriffs, I always thought it was cool. Later I remembered people would volunteer to help her with her yard work, drop off groceries, get her packages, etc. me and my friend would mow her yard for free.

    VincentMac1984 , YuriArcursPeopleimages Report

    A netizen who identifies as the only carpenter recently asked AskReddit about local rumors that Redditors have heard as kids, but it turned out to be real.

    The post garnered nearly 13,000 upvotes with another (also nearly) 5,000 comments in engagement.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along This is a little more lighthearted. But when I was in elementary school. Probably like 3rd grade? All the kids in my class would joke about how our primary teacher and our Spanish teacher “liked” each other. We were all little kids, so of course it was just dumb little kids joking about around.

    That is, until a few years later when I was in middle school and I found out my old teacher and Spanish teacher recently got married.

    CountChoculasGhost , anastasia-shuraeva Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along Always heard rumours that this kid who I rode bmx with, his dad was a high ranking member of the Hells. One day we’re over there, years later, chatting s**t around the fire in his backyard and about 70 patched members arrived at the house for a meeting. They bought us a s**tload of beer and told us to find a park to drink it in for a few hours while they had their meeting.

    mygolgoygol , therideacademy Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along I grew up where there were some signs of Native Americans. I started believing that this one particularly beautiful spot had to be sacred, and probably was a burial ground. I’d convince my friends to hold hands in a circle and try to commune with the dead. After I got a bit older I was super embarrassed that I’d ever done such things.

    A few years later a Native American came but and told us how sacred the land was that we owned, and asked permission to hold peyote rituals with his tribe and others on our land. To this day they still come out and set up a teepee and drum all night, absolutely flying on hallucinogenics.

    Turns out I was right

    ReasonablyConfused , andrewtneel Report

    The amount of storytelling in this thread could be enough to write several mystery books with all of its talks of cults in the woods, football fields built on cemeteries, heroic business people with a dark past, being struck by lightning, dating teachers, you name it, it’s probably here.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along This older kid had this lightning streak scar all over one side of his neck and down his body. The rumor was he was throwing stuff at the power lines behind our neighborhood.

    Turns out he was. He was throwing copper wire at it, and it arced. He’s lucky to be alive.

    WhyEvenTryEver , guiirossi Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along The park we used to play football at used to be a cemetery, they exhumed all the coffins and moved them years before I was born. We’d freak each other out especially at night saying there were still bodies buried there. One day we were playing and they were doing some grounds keeping work and they found a coffin, the state came out and found 30 more. We were actually playing on top of hallowed ground.

    Telrom_1 , yakup-polat-420882786 Report

    Because chaos is a natural part of life, it’s only appropriate to learn something out of the ordinary about rumors, and that is how to start one.

    First up is crafting a compelling rumor. Figure out what you want to achieve with this rumor. Classics include humiliating someone to deflate their ego or exact karma for being a jerk, but it can be more elaborate, like breaking up a couple.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along I have two. Both about elderly men.

    First, there was an elderly man that could be seen walking all over town. Long gray beard. Usually seen in tattered clothes. “Walking Man” or the “Silver Bullet” were nicknames for him. The rumor was he was actually really wealthy but lots of people just assumed he was homeless because he was always walking, carrying groceries or whatever. Well, about a year before he passed, it came out that he was actually one of the wealthiest residents in our town when he donated millions to local youth programs and schools. Turns out, he just liked walking a lot and placed no value on material things like clothes and cars.

    Second, there was an elderly man who was actually homeless . The rumor was that he drank himself crazy some years back and just never got help. He was in and out of jail a bunch but always seem to be given some slack by law enforcement. This truth is tragic. He did drink himself crazy out of necessity. He was a paramedic. One night he responded to a wreck that turned out to be his wife and daughter had been hit by a distracted driver speeding on a narrow road. Neither survived. Understandably, he was never ok after that. He would sometimes check the pizza shop I used to manage for spare slices. Broke my heart that all I could do was offer him some free pizza. Hope you can rest in peace now, Red.

    Spo_Ofzor , ayosake Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along When I was a little kid like 7 and roaming around the neighborhood with my gang of little rascals (this was in the 50’s when kids could safely play outside all day with their pals without parental worry) there was a rumor that in the house two doors over from mine that the parents had locked their mentally handicapped kid in the attic and that he was one of my gang friend’s older brothers. We played with him, but he always denied that he had any siblings. We were never allowed to enter his house which was strange because we were always stopping at our other pals homes during our days roaming to drink water or use the bathroom. About 2 years later the boy and his family moved away never to be seen again, but when they moved it was discovered that, yes, an older brother did exist and that he was kept locked away in the attic. It was a very creepy discovery! Mental health awareness and acceptance was in the dark ages in the 1950’s.

    BoS_Vlad , chrisfarr_ Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along One grade school teacher (m) had married another (f). Did not last, think weeks not months or years. Rumours were 1) he was gay. 2) he threw up on the wedding night in the middle of the attempted consummation.

    Both turned out true.

    PlayNicePlayCrazy , nate_dumlao Report

    It helps to also identify some emotional triggers that you can use to your advantage. You know, stir some panic and anxiety in the individual. Or individuals.

    So, focus on a topic that would be relatable and would hit close to home. Topics like money help a lot, like winning the lottery, and it helps to include details that would please a crowd, like maybe choosing a controversial decision.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along The community I grew up in had an abandoned hospital in it. The place was spooky as hell. The story was that the hospital had a maternity ward where they would steal babies from Indigenous women and then make the mothers disappear. They also said they would experiment on people and perform surgeries with no anesthetic.

    Turned out it was true!

    They say that place is crawling with ghosts and you could see the ghosts of the women walking around the hallways looking for their babies. I can not confirm that one. I always stayed away from that place it was too creepy.

    They ended up trying to redevelop the building into condos and holy s**t you could not pay me enough to ever live in there.

    russelljonesya , jonjons Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along When I was a kid (in the late 70’s) there was a rumor that an old weird family were retired circus folk and kept an elephant in their barn, we all thought it was just an urban legend, until one day there was news reporters and all kinds of police activity at the residence and the elephant was taken away in a truck lol

    No_Variety9420 , rsf_fl Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along Girl in my high school was rumored to have been dating one of the teachers who was married.

    This was probably true because after graduation, the teacher had retired, divorced his wife and married the girl.

    SteamDecked , photos_by_lanty Report

    Needless to say, the rumors have to be simple and believable, so making all the details overly complicated and the multitude to which the rumor extends beyond the immediate reality is not a good idea. Keep it grounded.

    Once all that is sorted out, start spreading. And it’s not just talking about—it’s convincing others to spread it too. Hire all the bigmouths to do the job.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along A vagrant looking man used to collect cans from local parks and whatnot (imagine someone pushing a shopping cart in tattered clothing). Rumor was he was generationally wealthy and when he passed away he left a fortune to the park and rec department to update facilities. Apparently this happens in a lot of places which is awesome to hear. His name was Nick and this was in Wisconsin back in the late 1980’s/early 1990’s.

    blow_montana , frostroomhead Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along Doctor in town (who was a huge football booster) gave prescription painkillers to high school kids.

    He passed away before it all came to light so he never saw justice.

    Lots and lots of kids through the years unsurprisingly became addicted.

    NotOnHerb5 , walkingondream Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along There was a rumor at my high school that that the building down the way was a cult. It wasn’t unheard of to dare people to go over there and then you’d end up being followed or sometimes invited to dinner.

    Turns out, it was the HQ of the cult the Duggars were in, IBLP. I was watching that documentary and my mind was blown, because all the high school rumors had been true!!

    _curiouschloe_ , drazenphoto Report

    Social media and the internet in general might prove to be very helpful with the level of anonymity that it provides. Fake accounts will be your best friend, both as a means of spreading and as a means of leaving deliberate evidence around. You know, breadcrumbs that make the whole thing sound legit. But don’t go overboard as it should also keep your tracks hidden.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along When I was a child *shakes cane* we had the legend of The Baroness. Supposedly, she lived in a haunted house and drove around a pink hearse! When I was old enough to drive and explore on my own, I finally saw her! In her pink hearse! She also did live in a house that would have coded as spooky or haunted to a small child. It was just an old house with neat architecture.

    NonStopKnits , nathanmcdine Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along It was a local urban legend that this huge, old, and abandoned house was haunted because like a century ago there was a m****r there. Kids would freak each other out over it, tell ghost stories, sneak onto the property, whatever. I thought it was just that, an urban legend about an abandoned house. Nope – in the early 1900s the husband and wife were found dead in the house, it was never solved, but the son was suspected because he was missing and never found. No one moved into it after that and it’s sat empty since. I only found out because they planned to tear it down to build apartments on the property 2 years ago but the local community rallied to preserve it.

    Mat_Cauthons_Hat_ , onanini Report

    Speaking of which, covering your tracks is a huge part of spreading rumors.

    So, make the rumor hard to disprove. Include details that are impossible to track down, like someone making a mistake and it affecting someone who nobody knows about and can’t find to confirm it.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along That there was an unmarked graveyard in a field across the road (rural Canada). The oldest guy in the area talked about there being one somewhere in the area, but he wasn’t sure where.

    Maybe 10 years ago, an older gentleman, maybe 70’s came over to our house when I was home from college and asked who owned the property across the road. He said his family lived in the area over 100 years ago and he was looking for the family burial plot. He asked for permission to search and spent some time with dousing rods in the field (maybe 75 acres total, but he was focused closer to the road).

    He marked over 15 spots that he said were places where bodies were buried underground. That he could tell by the way the rods moved if it was male, female or a child. He even showed us how the rods would be still, but when you walked over the spots he marked, they would cross, or move away from each other.

    He came back the next year and spent some money getting a big stone and a nice custom plaque made to mark this spot. He probably spent $1000 or a bit more on that, including renting a backho and operator.

    Then, we never saw him again.

    We used to play hide and go seek at night but we’d never go to that area where he placed the markings, because it felt eerie and sometimes would be foggier.

    After he showed us the dousing that one day, I told my younger cousin to lay on the ground so I could try it on him. Walked over him with the dousing rods and nothing happened, so I said, “well, I guess you ain’t got no soul,” and walked back to the house.

    jamiezero , wolfhound9111 Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along The local homeless guy who was always friendly and happy was actually a super successful lawyer. The truth was that he *was* a successful lawyer but one day cracked under the pressure, sold all his things and just started living the vagabond life. He said he was happier looking for where his next meal was coming from than money ever made him. I think it was the first seed planted in my brain of “don’t k**l yourself for a company”. I don’t remember his name, but I hope he’s still happy.

    ProfessorGluttony , zacdurant Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along One persistent rumor that went around during highschool was that one of our biology teachers was having sex with students. We all thought it was a joke because the guy was rather ugly looking and we all knew his wife (a fellow teacher) was always around.

    Years pass and I find out that the male teacher was found having several relationships with underaged students. He got arrested, divorced, put on the SO registration, and lost custody of his kids.

    MTGBro_Josh , NomadSoul1 Report

    It also goes without saying that keeping the list of accomplices to a minimum is an advantage because that would also minimize the chances of the rumor leading back to you. It also helps to make sure that whatever that you’re spreading a rumor about doesn’t automatically leave you as the only suspect, i.e. if you’ve been entrusted with a secret and you’re the only one who knows about it.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along I’ve heard about two different teachers at my highschool being creepy and they both have been fired for inappropriate contact with students

    offbrandbarbie , drazenphoto Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along There was this a*****e in my junior high gym class, real bully type. And when he would act out everyone would ridicule him for his mother being a c***k w***e and we would laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. Well, it turned out it was true – there was a public confirmation in the paper, and his bullying made a lot more sense bc it turned out his home life was what you would expect from someone having a c***k w***e mother, and no one talked about it anymore, and we did not laugh so much anymore. Ironically, I think he felt so ashamed when everyone found out, that he actually stopped being such a d**k head.

    Hola_y_Ayudame , Garakta-Studio Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along A priest was rumored to be way too friendly with some of the girls in our grade school. It came out years later in an investigation that he had in fact gotten a teenager pregnant.

    BlueStarrSilver , klavdiyav Report

    Obligatory PSA: keep in mind that spreading rumors is frowned upon and in some cases can be very, very illegal, so proceed at your own risk, i.e. keep it harmless and fun. Or, if anything, to teach someone a lesson about spreading rumors and ruining people’s lives because humans can be cruel sometimes.

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along That if you rode bikes or four-wheelers down this certain trail an old man would come after you and attack you. A few years later, some kids were riding four-wheelers down that trail and an old guy shot and k***ed them both. Damnedest thing, they had already left his property before he caught up to them, and he k***ed them on public land. I’m pretty sure he died in prison a few years ago.

    JudgementalChair , jaimedantas Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along When I was in jr high in the early 2000s there was a rumour about one of my female classmates and the male gym teacher. Of course we all thought it was a rumour but a few years later it came out that he was sleeping with multiple students. Watching everyone’s face as they realized the rumours we heard were true was pretty wild. That girl also ended up just disappearing after it all came out, probably dropped out or moved schools, I feel bad for her, she was a victim but no one talked about her like she was.

    SgtGo , cottonbro Report

    45 Things Folks Online Thought Were Just Rumors Only To Find Out They Were Real All Along That our neighbor was a p**o. Married with kids. One day, he drops dead of a heart attack. When the family started going through his stuff, they were so disgusted apparently just sold the house as-is with the furniture and everything.

    archfapper , Rawpixel Report

    So, heard any juicy rumors lately that you wish becomes true? Why not share them in the comment section below!

    But if that’s not something you’d be into, then mayhaps take your virtual self to check out some conspiracy theories people actually believe in, despite them being over the top ridiculous!

    The two women (in their late 40’s) were actually homosexual, everybody on our street believed them when they told everybody that they were sisters. I used to run errands for them maybe 3 times a week and they always gave me a shilling every time.

    Dry-Application3 Report

    Everyone at my school knew someone who knew someone who told them that this one house just down the road from the school was owned by a locally known drug dealer and it was his emergency hide out house. Years later I was driving past and laughed at how ridiculous the story was. 2 weeks after that the house was on the news with armed police surrounding it. Turns out it really was this drug hideout and the guy was involved in way more stuff than just that. They found drugs, weapons and evidence of a human trafficking ring in there. The house got mysteriously burned down while his court case was going on and has been a burned out empty lot ever since.

    Ordovi Report

    kid in my third grade class was ALWAYS late to school. i’m talking he once showed up to school 5 minutes before classes were released to go home. the rumor among parents & teachers was that his mom was an alcoholic & the dad lived a couple towns over so he often had to wait for his dad to take him or take care of his mom until she was well enough to drive (this was a private school with no bus). she died of liver failure a few months ago according to facebook. makes it so much more f****d up that everyone knew, including the teacher, and didn’t have any sympathy for him. i distinctly remember the teacher telling him on multiple occasions that it was “his responsibility to show up on time.” he was 8, was he supposed to drive himself??? makes me so sad & i hope he’s doing okay now.

    texcritters Report

    As a kid, I heard rumors about a hidden treasure in the nearby woods. Years later, during a construction project, they unearthed a time capsule, proving the rumor had some truth to it!

    KraasCos Report

    Our local China Buffet was using illegal immigrants as wait staff and then trafficking them across town to a massage parlor they owned that gave the ol rub n tug. Huge scandel when it happened but it was hushed up pretty quickly. The restaurant reopened some months after under new management.

    happilystoned42069 Report

    A kid at my school who’s mom disappeared when he was a baby was rumored that she was k***ed by Ted Bundy. Decades later researchers think it’s true.

    shakeyjake Report

    There was a teacher at my school that kids would claim was insanely rich. Like he lived in a giant mansion near the oceanfront and he only taught because he just genuinely loves being a teacher. He was pretty private so he would always say you shouldn’t ask people about their finances when kids would just ask him. So senior year he has the seniors over for a year-end awards ceremony and superlatives type dinner deal

    Yup, super rich and lived in a huge mansion by the ocean. Said he inherited all his money from his parents and I think he said a sibling or two got written out of the will for being s****y so he didn’t have to share it. Became a teacher out of college, then when his parents died and he inherited everything he just kept teaching because he liked it.

    snootyvillager Report

    There were rumors that there were bodies that were dumped into a pond at a park. Turns out it was true. They drained the pond to clean it and found over 30 bodies. I used to run right next to there for Cross Country.

    Xeblac Report

    In middle school there was an urban legend one of the teachers was in playboy. She was very attractive and every 12 yr old hetero boys fantasy.

    One day a friend down the street found a huge stash of his dad’s old playboys from the 60 and 70s. He started going through them all until he hit one issue from the 70s. It was a compilation piece on college women. To his surprise, and the rest of us when he confirmed with our little group, it was our teacher. No one believed it but it was her name, college and face.

    The good thing was we agreed to never show, nor tell, anyone else in our class. Though it was very tempting to tell her a*****e son who was in our grade that we knew the truth.

    joepez Report

    Okay so this wasn’t one that I heard as a kid but there was rumor around the college my wife works at that the chemistry professor was actually the father of the literature professor’s baby.
    A couple of the students asked her about it and she admitted that yes, the father was the chemistry professor.

    The students were scandalized. Until she explained to them that said chemistry professor was her husband and this would be their second kid. Apparently, it never occurred to the kids at this small Midwestern college that couples didn’t always share a last name.

    oldjudge86 Report

    Wasn’t a kid and nobody will believe this, but I have friends in production that told me about Kevin Spacey at least 6 months before the allegations went public.

    PLEASEHELPMEBROS Report

    There was a teacher who was rumored to walk a great distance to and from work each day due to prior cardiac issues that stemmed from weight.

    Years later, while at work, I saw that teacher walking home each day, and the time I saw that teacher coincided with the time they would’ve left school and started walking.

    Blew my mind!

    MeAtHereDotNow Report

    We had a rumor about there being a white horse in the woods behind the movie theater in our town. There were a couple homeless people living there though, so no one went and checked it out. Well, before seeing a movie one day, me and a couple of friends decided to make the trek. We stumbled passed the makeshift camp, and found a small path that led to a fence. We stood there for a couple seconds, and then, seemingly out of nowhere, a majestic white steed came trotting towards us. We snapped a quick pic on an early 2000’s cell phone of our friend and the horse, and got the hell outta there. The pic looked absolutely fake, and no one believes us about it to this day.

    xbutcherx Report

    That tight biking turn at the bottom of the hill everyone called, ‘dead mans curve’ because someone died there?

    Someone did, indeed, die there.

    haysus25 Report

    Back in the late 80’s, a local Principal and his wife went out fishing. There was a storm and she fell out of the boat and sank before he could grab her. The story always seemed odd. 20 years later on his deathbed, he finally confessed that he did m****r her and dumped the body out of the boat

    Senepicmar Report

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  • 35 Times Entitled People Showed Their True Colors On Christmas (New Pics)

    35 Times Entitled People Showed Their True Colors On Christmas (New Pics)

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    The holiday spirit is all about giving, and we’re not talking about gifts specifically. We mean spreading joy and love to those around you. Being compassionate and understanding and showing kindness to the world. It’s also about expressing gratitude for what you have and what you receive. This cycle of grace and generosity is what makes the season so special.

    However, some people like to abuse the magical feeling of the holiday spirit that lingers in the air without carrying it in their hearts themselves. All they want to do is take and don’t even consider saying thank you to anyone. Find the worst examples of these scrooges by scrolling down below. 

    [ad_2] Ilona Baliūnaitė
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  • Cheney Offers to Waterboard Trump – Ralph Lombard, Humor Times

    Cheney Offers to Waterboard Trump – Ralph Lombard, Humor Times

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    Ex-Congresswoman wants to waterboard Trump to ‘get at the truth’ about January 6th.

    In a less-publicized section of Liz Cheney’s tell-all expose “Oath and Honor,” the former US Congresswoman explains how she’d personally deal with Donald Trump.

    waterboard Trump
    Like father, like daughter: Liz Cheney wants to waterboard Trump.

    “I’d waterboard him,” she writes. “Donald Trump is, without a doubt, the gravest threat this country has ever faced. And I mean ever! Far greater than Bin Laden ever was, far greater than Lee Harvey Oswald, or Fidel Castro, or Jefferson Davis, or John Wilkes Booth, or Benedict Arnold, or even Hitler himself. And if that doesn’t justify enhanced interrogation techniques, I don’t know what does!

    “I think that if I was allowed just five minutes alone with him at an undisclosed location in Guantanamo Bay for a heart-to-heart chat — well, I just think that would go a long way towards helping bring out the real truth about Trump’s involvement in the January 6th insurrection. As a matter of fact, if I’m any judge of character, it might only take ten or fifteen seconds.”

    In a later chapter Cheney reveals what she thinks would be the proper punishment for Trump’s many crimes.

    “When Trump gets sent to prison — I mean if Trump gets sent to prison, ha-ha– he certainly should not be given a free ride. Hopefully by that time he’ll be financially ruined and completely penniless, and absolutely dependent on the good will of all the people he’s thrown under the bus over the years. Which is to say, he’ll be all alone.

    “This will force him to engage in demeaning outsourced manual labor to pay for his keep in prison. Fast-food employment might well be considered. Of course working at McDonald’s would be more of a reward than a punishment, but I think that working at Taco Bell as, say, the toilet cleaning boy, might be entirely appropriate. And we’d even give him three free meals a day of all the tacos he could eat, washed down with plenty of genuine imported Mexican water.

    “On the weekends Trump could be locked in a pillory in the prison exercise yard for gala celebrations. The festivities could begin with a “dangerous fruit” throwing contest for the children, followed by a thousand-dollar-a-plate fund-raiser, where participants get to break the plates over Trump’s head. Ten thousand dollar kicks in the ass would also be available. The grand finale could be an auction, with a minimum bid of one hundred thousand dollars, where one lucky lady gets to grab Trump by the bells (sic), and wring them for thirty seconds!”

    Ralph LombardRalph Lombard
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    Ralph Lombard

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