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One of the most popular activities for kids and teens these days is playing video games. While there is some debate on whether or not that is good for their development, that’s not what we’re looking to get into today. Instead, we want to talk about some of the unknowns that parents may not be aware of when it comes to gaming to give you the information you need to make more informed decisions.
1. Bullying and toxic behavior are prevalent.
With many online multiplayer games, users have the ability to chat with other users while playing. This is not just for games played on the computer, but console games (like Xbox and Play Station) offer the ability to connect this way too.
The original intent of this feature is to enhance the gameplay to allow collaborative efforts. While it is often used for this, it’s also often used for negative things like cyber bullying, trash talk, harassment, and as a hotbed for sexual or violent language.
The challenge for parents is that there are no real good ways of monitoring this other than being in the room while your kids are playing. Even then, most kids are using a headset to communicate, so you’re only hearing one side of the conversation.
How can parents deal with this? Here are a few recommendations.
- Remember you always have the ability to choose to not let your kids play these games in online multiplayer mode.
- Consider having them play the game in the same room as you where you can help monitor the conversations at least from one side.
- If the online game is on the computer where the group chat is through text, consider setting up ways to monitor the conversations (not always possible).
- Make sure you talk to your kids about the dangers of these chats and explain what to do if and when they encounter some of this behavior.
2. Private servers and side platforms expand the risk.
Depending on the game’s popularity, there may be private platforms, social media groups, or Discords (online chat areas) where players are encouraged to engage when not playing the game. Again, the idea behind these is to build a community around players, but they are often misused for nefarious activities.
If you are monitoring your kids online gaming activities, realize that it can also be taking place on other platforms besides just the game.
All of the same risks from within the game exist on these private servers, and are sometimes worse because they introduce the ability to send private messages. Private messages allow people to say and do things that might be flagged in a group chat setting, but can get through privately.
Additionally, many of the most popular online games do try and have some safety measures in place for the chat features. When you move off the platform, though, many of these protections go out the window.
Please don’t interpret this to say that as long as you keep your kids on the gaming platform they’re safe. We’re merely saying that there are additional risks that take place on the side platforms. Many of the games also offer private messaging right within the platform.
3. Grooming takes place in the group chat.
One of the biggest risks that come with online gaming and the community around it is grooming. Grooming is when adults and older kids build trust with vulnerable kids in order to get them to do something for them. Often, that ‘something’ involves sexual behavior, explicit photos, radicalization to an ideology, or other activities that should never be happening.
Unfortunately, grooming in online gaming is much more prevalent than we’d all like to admit.
Bad actors know that games are where kids congregate in an environment that is often unmoderated and devoid of parental supervision. These bad actors also know that even if parents are trying to supervise, a lack of understanding of how the technology works creates hidden ways to communicate under the radar.
Again, you do have options here as a parent. The safest options involve educating your kids, limiting the amount of time they play, limiting when they can play (opting for no late-night sessions), or even choosing not to allow them to play at all.
Will you get pushback on this from your kids? Most likely yes. You may hear how unfair you are, how everyone else is doing it, and how you’re going to ruin their social life by limiting or removing them from this environment.
While we’re not here to tell you how to parent, we do want to remind you that you are the parent. In our humble opinion, your primary goal as a parent is not to be your child’s friend, but to keep them safe.
If this involves taking something away from them or putting on limitations they don’t think are fair, it might still be the right thing to do.
4. In-game purchases can be used to build influence.
In many online multiplayer games, there is an entire ecosystem of commerce built around things you use in the game. Players have the ability to purchase things like new levels, new characters, upgrades, and so much more.
While we understand the purpose of this is for the games to be able to make money, it does create opportunities for groomers and bad actors to build influence. We’ve heard far too many stories of groomers purchasing things for kids to start building trust and developing what seems to them as a friendship.
Eventually, this trust can be used to manipulate kids into doing things. It also creates opportunities to make offers like “I’ll buy this for you if you send me a picture of you doing this” or something similar.
It’s a scary thought, but it happens much more often than many of us would want to believe.
When you give kids access to the internet (even through video games), you’re not giving them access to the world, you’re giving the world access to them.
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Healthy Framework Team
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