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Why Talking About Feelings is the Ultimate Act of Self-Care

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Are you a person that struggles when it comes to talking about feelings?  You aren’t alone. We all find this tricky now and then. In this post, I’ll discuss the benefits of talking about your feelings, as well as some common reasons why you may avoid doing so. I’ll also touch on a few practical tips and techniques for overcoming your fear of expressing emotions and how to make emotional expression a regular part of your self-care routine.

By the end of this post, you’ll have a better understanding of why talking about your feelings is the ultimate act of self-care, and how to include it in your daily life.

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Talking About Feelings is Part of Self-care

In a world where we are constantly juggling multiple responsibilities and worries, taking care of your mental health is more important than ever. Self-care has really become a buzzword in recent years, but what does it really mean? In simple terms, self-care means taking care yourself in a way that promotes your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.

One important part of this self-care is talking about your feelings and emotions. Expressing your emotions can be difficult (I know, I’ve been there!), but it’s essential for keeping good mental health and also strengthening your relationships with others.

If you avoid talking about your feelings, you risk bottling up your emotions, which can very often lead to physical health problems. On the other hand, expressing your emotions can help you to process and regulate our feelings. This can end up leading to improvements in your mental health and increased self-awareness.

Benefits of Talking About Your Feelings

1. Improved mental health

Talking about your feelings can have an extremely positive impact on your mental health. When you express your emotions, you release built-up tension and stress that might otherwise have a negative impact on your mental health.

By talking about your feelings, you can gain a better understanding of yourself and your emotions, and a greater ability to manage our mental health. Your increased self-awareness should also then lead to improved decision-making, increased creativity, and a greater overall life satisfaction.

As well as this if you discuss your emotions with people you trust, such as friends or a therapist, you may be able to develop positive coping mechanisms, as we learn healthy ways to manage difficult emotions.

2. Strengthened relationships

Besides the mental health benefits of talking about your feelings, emotional expression can also strengthen your relationships with others.

When you decide to open up about your emotions, you let others to see you for who you truly are, which can lead to a deeper connection with them and greater empathy.

By sharing your vulnerabilities, you create opportunities for other people to support you, by developing a sense of closeness and mutual trust. This then can lead to a more meaningful and fulfilling relationship.

By talking about your feelings and sharing your experiences, you also create chances for others to do the same, which leads to more authentic and open communication with them. You may even find you have more in common with them than you think.

3. Reduced stress and anxiety

As I mentioned before, bottling up your feelings can have a really negative impact on your mental health and could lead to long-term health issues like stress and anxiety. When you keep your emotions to yourself, you are taking away the opportunity to process and regulate our feelings.

You may not realise this but as stress and anxiety develop, so do physical symptoms like headaches, muscle tension, and sleep disturbances. However, being able to talk about feelings can help you release this built-up tension give you a real sense of relief and even relaxation.

The Fear of Talking About Feelings

Why Am I Scared To Talk About How I Feel?

Despite the massive benefits of talking about your feelings, let’s face it, many people may still struggle with the fear of expressing their emotions. There can be a number of reasons why someone might be afraid to talk about their feelings, for example they may be afraid of being judged or rejected, feeling vulnerable or even ashamed.

For some people, expressing their emotions might feel like a sign of weakness, making them feel uncomfortable or exposed. This is quite common in a lot of men. Psychology Today talks about this is in more depth in their article “Why So Many Men Struggle with Their Emotions“.

Others might have experienced negative reactions from people in the past when they opened up, which has then lead to their fear of rejection or criticism. Another reason might be that their culture or society tries to discourage emotional expression, emphasising that feelings are something they should hide or supress.

Whatever the root cause of your fear, it’s so important to realise you have these feelings to be able to overcome them.

Negative effects of avoiding talking about feelings

Avoiding emotions and burying your head in the sand is easy to do, but it can have massive negative effects on your mental health and overall well-being. If you ignore your emotions, you may end up feeling isolated or disconnected from others, which can ultimately leave you feeling lonely and depressed.  

Furthermore, avoiding your feelings can stop you from addressing any underlying issues and working towards resolving them. This may then change into a sense of helplessness and powerlessness.

It’s really important to recognize that shying away from your emotions may provide temporary relief, but in the long run, it can have serious negative consequences on your mental health and well-being.

By being brave and expressing your feelings, you’ll be able to work towards greater self-awareness and emotional strength, leading to an overall improvement of your mental health.

Tips to Overcome The Fear of Talking About Feelings

Overcoming the fear of talking about feelings can be a very challenging process, but there are practical tips and techniques you can use that can help.

  1. One effective strategy is journaling, which can give you a safe and private space to express your emotions without the fear of judgment or rejection.
  2. Mindfulness practices, such as meditation or deep breathing, can also help to increase your self-awareness and reduce feelings of anxiety, making it easier to talk to others.
  3. Seeking professional therapy or counselling can be another very effective way to overcome your fear of expressing emotions. A trained professional can give you some guidance, support, and validation in a safe and confidential setting.
  4. Opening up to friends you trust or family members can also help to deepen your relationships, and help to build a supportive network for emotional expression.

Whatever strategy or combination of strategies works best for you, the key is to start small and be patient with yourself. Overcoming the fear of expressing emotions and talking about feelings takes time and practice, but the benefits are well worth the effort.

How to Help Someone Who is Avoiding Talking About Feelings

If someone you know is avoiding talking about their feelings, it can be quite difficult to know how to help them. However, there are some practical tips you can use to encourage them to open up.

  1. First, it’s important to find a safe and comfortable space where they feel relaxed and at ease.
  2. The right timing can also be crucial, so consider waiting until they’re in a calm and receptive mood before approaching the conversation.
  3. When you start to talk about their feelings, try to encourage them to use “I” statements instead of snappy angry language. This is because it will help to create a calmer and non-judgmental environment.
  4. You can also offer practical advice on how they should express their emotions, for example encourage them to start with small feelings and then gradually work up to more complicated emotions.
  5. Finally, stay focused. Make sure you listen carefully and with empathy. Put your mobile phone away and make them feel heard without judgment or criticism.

Remember, it’s important to be patient and supportive, and to respect their boundaries if they’re not ready to open up. Don’t push it if they just don’t want to talk.

Final thoughts – Make talking about feelings part of your self-care routine

So, to sum up, talking about your feelings is a crucial aspect of self-care that can have a great impact on your mental health and overall well-being. By talking about your emotions, you can understand your feelings better, encourage positive self-talk, and strengthen your relationships with others.

Overcoming your fear of expressing emotions can be challenging, but with the right strategies and support, it is possible to make emotional expression a regular part of your self-care routine. Some practical tips for making emotional expression a habit for you include things like scheduling regular check-ins with yourself, keeping a gratitude journal, or asking for support from trusted friends or professionals. By talking about your feelings and making it a key part of your self-care routine, you can develop better self-awareness, resilience, and overall well-being.

Don’t forget to sign up for your free self-care audit and find out exactly which areas of your wellbeing need a little TLC.

If you feel you would like to dig a little deeper into this topic here are some recommend books for you:

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Rachel Mills

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