They all looked absolutely knackered during the coronation ceremony and on the balcony afterward. But curious minds couldn’t help but wonder, “Which of the royal family members got their end away later that night?”
Editor’s note: Now, wait one minute. Isn’t that a subject just a little bit of a bridge too far?
Reply: The Spoof is a celebrated institution of a free press and is respected worldwide for going where no writer has ever gone before.
Editor’s note: Oh, Christ! MI5 is going to call. They can’t handle the truth!
Anyway, King Charles III looked utterly exhausted with all those layers of fancy garments he was sporting – the gold brocade, the ermine cape, and we can only speculate about his frilly underwear. And my, we watched, heart-in-mouth, as that heavy bejeweled crown made him zigzag and stumble along the Abbey aisle. We all held our breath until he safely descended the walkway and settled into the golden coach.
The King handed off the Orb and Sceptre to a passerby, then slumped into the carriage with a gentle push from Major Johnny, promptly dozing off. The horses must have mistaken the King’s snores as a giddy-up and took off toward the palace.
The rest of the hardworking royal family on the balcony appeared equally fatigued and likely had no energy for any rumpy-pumpy on Coronation night.
But back at the palace, a security officer patrolling the grounds found a hiking boot on the other side of a gated house that appeared to have been hurled all the way out the front door, down the driveway, and over the gate, presumably after someone opened the front door and proclaimed with thick Received Pronunciation, “Honey, I’m hime!”
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