If you want to create more impact as an entrepreneur, start with yourself. Self-care is a crucial component of your business’s success. As a productivity coach, I work with clients to help them overcome feelings of guilt and embarrassment when it comes to taking time off. If you view self-care as something that happens only when the workday is over, you’re missing out.
Effectively managing your time and energy can mean the difference between being energized and being exhausted. Regular lunch breaks, coffee breaks, and vacations aside, there are ways to take care of yourself while in the office. Here are three key areas you’ll want to pay close attention to on a regular basis for self-care success.
Make mornings work for you.
Do you tend to reach for your cell phone the moment you wake up? Give yourself time every morning without being connected to your smartphone. Doing so will allow you to warm up to the day and prepare for what’s ahead.
To that end, try using an alarm clock or watch instead of your phone. Keep your phone outside of the bedroom or on the other side of the room so that you must get out of bed to retrieve it. Once you’re up, follow your existing self-care routine. That might be exercising, walking the dog, getting children ready, bathing, dressing, or having breakfast and your favorite hot beverage of choice.
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Now, this isn’t to say you can’t consult your phone during the morning. There may be times when it is necessary, but at least give yourself a reprieve from your phone when you wake from your nightly slumber.
Protect your time at all costs.
There are tasks in your business that only you can work on. You’ll need every bit of your full attention and concentration for this work. So, if you’ve been freely giving up your scheduled work time to others, be it staff or vendors, you’ll need to pull back. You can consider this a long-overdue calendar reset for yourself.
Start right at the source: Schedule a few hours of non-negotiable work time for yourself directly into your digital calendar or paper planner. Ask your assistant not to schedule any events or meetings during this time. Remind key staff and employees as to when you’ll be unavailable throughout the week.
The next step is to show up and work with purpose. Choose a handful of small tasks or a larger task to tackle during this time. Do whatever you need to stay focused. Temporarily silence your phone, log out of unnecessary apps, and remove physical clutter. When you dedicate time to work on what matters, the work will get done.
Avoid working on more things.
Entrepreneurship can be exciting, but it can also be draining. That’s why it’s important to pace yourself at the end of the workday and practice self-care. Remember, this is about your long-term business success, not how fast you can burn out.
Instead of jumping on to the next task at the end of your day, take a few moments to complete a thoughtful daily review of your work. Aim to finish up the bulk of your main work at least half an hour in advance. Turn your focus to the bigger picture. Given your daily goals, where does your work currently stand?
For starters, you can try asking yourself these three questions:
Which tasks did I complete today?
What is the status of my remaining tasks?
Which tasks need to be rescheduled for tomorrow or the day after?
Closing your day with this exercise might seem completely unnecessary. However, the proof is in the pudding. In time, you’ll begin to see how this exercise can set the next day’s work up for success. Not only will you gain a better understanding of your work, but you’ll have a clearer mind as you transition to your evening routine at home.
The opinions expressed here by Inc.com columnists are their own, not those of Inc.com.
Getting a refreshed look everyday might seem elusive, given how hectic life can be. However, by incorporating certain practices into your daily routine, it’s possible to feel rejuvenated and look refreshed all day long.
These habits don’t require a significant time investment or pricey beauty products. Instead, they involve simple lifestyle changes you can easily implement.
Try out these quick daily rituals to present a more vibrant version of yourself to the world.
Skincare routine
Following a daily skincare routine can help keep your skin in top shape. If you’re new to skincare, start with three simple steps: cleanse, tone, and moisturise. This process helps to remove accumulated dirt, balance your skin’s pH, and hydrate your skin. If possible, choose skincare products tailored to your skin type for the best results.
In addition to these steps, small beauty touches can enhance your refreshed look. For example, using an eyebrow pencil to shape and define your brows and a tinted lip balm to add a natural pop of colour can instantly make your face appear more vibrant and polished, helping you feel confident and put-together even on busy days.
Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate
Drinking plenty of water is absolutely crucial, yet most people don’t drink enough. Daily hydration revives your skin, making it look more youthful and supple. It flushes out toxins from your body and bolsters your overall health.
It’s recommended to start your day off with a glass of warm water with a squeeze of lemon. This will not only hydrate your body but also boost your metabolism and provide a dose of vitamin C.
Mindful eating
Pay attention to what you’re putting into your body. Processed food, sugar, and excessive caffeine can all leave you feeling sluggish and bloated.
A balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, lean protein, and whole grains can do wonders for your skin and energy level. Be mindful of your eating habits and try to incorporate nutritious meals into your daily routine.
Regular exercise
Regular exercise is a simple practice that can leave you refreshed all day. It improves blood circulation, which means your skin cells get the nutrients they need to stay healthy. It also increases the production of hormones that promote the repair of skin cells.
Try to get at least 30 minutes of physical exercise daily. Choosing an activity that you enjoy will make it easier to stick to the habit.
Sound sleep
A good night’s sleep is integral to looking fresh and staying energised throughout the day. While you sleep, your body works to repair damaged cells, rejuvenate your skin, and balance your body’s hydration. Developing a healthy sleep routine can make a world of difference.
Aim for 7-8 hours of quality sleep per night to wake up looking well-rested.
Mindful breathing
Stress can show on your face, leaving you looking tired and worn-out. Mindful breathing exercises are a great way to combat this.
Practices like deep diaphragmatic breathing or systematic breath practice techniques not only reduce stress, but can also enhance your overall well-being. You can do these exercises at any time of the day, but setting aside a specific time each day can make it easier to remember.
Regular exfoliation
Exfoliation is a skincare step that often gets overlooked. Regular exfoliation helps remove dead skin cells to reveal the fresh, vibrant layers underneath. It also helps with skin texture, reducing excess oil and preventing breakouts.
Depending on your skin type, you could exfoliate 1-3 times a week.
Self care
Being kind to yourself can have a noticeable impact on your external appearance. Make time every day for self-care rituals that make you feel pampered and special.
Treat yourself to small indulgences, like a relaxing bath, a favourite scented candle, or a luxurious skincare product. These little moments of care not only refresh your mind and body but also make thoughtful gifts for new mums. A positive mindset derived from self-love goes a long way in keeping you looking and feeling rejuvenated.
Everyone wants to look fresh and feel rejuvenated, but with the busy routines nowadays, it’s often an unattainable desire. By incorporating these quick daily rituals into your everyday routine, not only will you look more vibrant, but you’ll also feel healthy and refreshed, from the inside out.
What are your favourite daily rituals to boost wellbeing?
Have you ever heard the term ‘coherence’ as it relates to inner harmony? Perhaps, simply reading the words ‘inner harmony’ and ‘coherence’ bring about a desire to feel a little more firmly planted within yourself?
It’s not easy right now. I mean, life is rarely what anyone would describe as easy – but as far as my lifetime goes, it’s never been quite this challenging to navigate while maintaining any sense of calm. I have come to trust that things unfold as they need to for our own greater evolution. To try and change what we cannot control is the greatest source of our self-inflicted suffering.
What I can change are my mind, my heart and my response in any given situation. This is well within all of our control and this is why understanding coherence and inner harmony is so critical right now. We need it more than ever.
A lot of us have a vision of what a happy life looks like. It might include a dream home, a vacation, a certain type of partner, or perhaps a certain level of wealth and financial security.
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The reality is that none of that is the ticket if we can’t calm the nerves and flow more effortlessly through life. The desires for those things that we think will bring us greater happiness are not really what we need or want. What we truly crave is to feel at peace. It’s a lot easier and more obvious to crave material things or extravagant experiences than to sit for five or ten minutes, focus on our breathing and allow what we really want to wash over us. And what we want is that inner harmony.
What Does It Mean To Be In A Coherent State?
We know that the brain sends signals to the body. As I type this, my brain is telling my fingers to get to work on my lightning-fast, slightly manic, two-finger typing to get these words on my screen. That’s the brain sending a message to the body.
We also know that if we witness a scary or startling event, we feel a jolt of fear and our heart rate elevates. These are the efferent pathways of the nervous system: brain to body.
Very few of us actively acknowledge that the heart sends more signals to the brain than the brain sends to the heart and the rest of the body. These are called the afferent pathways.
When we can tune into that rhythm of the heart and bring it into coherence, we can directly impact how we feel from a nervous system perspective (anxious vs. calm) as well as how the frontocortical and motor cortex of the brain functions (responsive vs. reactive).
Optimally, we want to be in a coherent state where we feel calm and peaceful and where we are better able to make mindful decisions, allowing for critical, creative and solution-oriented thinking to dominate. As you might now be seeing, this is not the state most of us are in as we go about our day.
Most of us, most of the time, are operating in an incoherent state where we are experiencing stress, overwhelm, anxiety, uncertainty and fear. When we are in this state, our ability to think clearly, be compassionate, kind and caring is impaired. In short, we are not remotely at our best.
To be compassionate, one of the most critical heart-based emotions that we all need to be embodying right now, means tuning into the heart and bringing ourselves into coherence. What’s really amazing is that being compassionate brings us into coherence, and when we are in a coherent state, we are more compassionate, loving, kind, appreciative, grateful, calm and peaceful. A beautiful thing about this is that when we are in this state, we also directly invite others to feel more heart-centred as well.
What I love about the technique I’m about to share is that you don’t have to sit quietly in meditation for 20 minutes to get there. You don’t need to remove yourself from life. Don’t get me wrong: it certainly helps to develop a dedicated meditation practice, as that will make the 30-second doses of coherence easier to achieve, but it’s not essential for impact.
The technique I’m sharing below is based on the teachings of the HeartMath Institute. There is no right or wrong way to be proactive; it’s all about steadying your heart rhythm and bringing your mind and body into coherence.
Getting Into Coherence
Take a few moments to focus on and slow your breathing. Consider trying an inhale for a count of 1-2-3-4 and then a 1-2-3-4 exhale.
Once your breath has steadied, envision this breath coming in through your heart and out through your heart. Continue with your slower than normal breathing.
Now, as you continue breathing slowly in and out through your heart, embody the feeling of love, compassion and appreciation. Feel in your body how it feels to be deeply cared for, appreciated and loved. I find it helpful to turn the corner of my mouth into a smile as I embody this feeling.
Sit with this feeling for as long as you have time for.
If you want to extend your practice, after a few minutes, you can extend that feeling of love, appreciation and compassion outward to someone you know, to a community or to the planet as a whole. Continue focusing on your breath, coming in and out through your heart and embodying these heart-centred emotions.
Inner Harmony In 30 Seconds
I have been doing this practice daily – sometimes for 5 minutes, sometimes for 20 minutes – for several years. It’s a bit of a personal check-in. Lately, however, I think I’m likely clocking in a lot more time because of my ongoing 30-second practices all day, throughout the day.
See, as I mentioned earlier, it’s tough out there. Tension is high, resilience is low and most people are going about their day operating from an incoherent state, making them reactive, short, fearful, and lacking patience and compassion. And I do my best to blast it out. I picture it a bit like the Care Bear Stare.
When I am standing in line, waiting at a red light on my bicycle, or even when my son is exhausted after a day of school and melt-down-ready, I mindfully slow my breathing and embody compassion while sending this emotion out to whomever is near me.
Imagine for a moment if 5% of us did this. Or what about 10%? If every 10th person we encounter was embodying love, compassion, empathy and care, we’d be living in a very different world.
If happiness is really what you’re after, you’ll get there a lot faster – in fact, you’ll get there today – if you take a few moments to get into coherence. It’s literally your next breath away.
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In our fast-paced world, finding time to focus on personal well-being can sometimes seem impossible. There are too many things to do and not enough time.
However, self-care isn’t a luxury—it’s necessary to maintain balance and joy in our lives. Whether navigating the highs and lows of daily life or tackling stress head-on, discovering the right self-care practices for your needs can make all the difference.
From nurturing your body and mind to fostering soulful relaxation, self-care takes many forms, each as unique as the individual who embraces it.
So buckle up for a rejuvenating self-care journey as we explore seven transformative types of self-care and practical tips for seamlessly integrating self-care into your daily routine.
It’s time to prioritize you!
So, let’s look at the seven types of self-care and how you can practice each type to improve your life.
But first, let’s quickly review precisely what self-care is.
What Is Self-Care?
There is a lot of history behind the concept of self-care, with external forces pushing this concept to the forefront of people’s minds. But, no matter why you’re practicing it, self-care serves the same purpose: to combat stress.
We all know that you cannot function at your best or take care of others without taking proper care of yourself. This doesn’t just apply to taking care of your physical self– it also requires your attention in life domains such as mental and emotional health.
In our epidemic of anxiety and depression, taking care of yourself is more important than ever.
At its heart, self-care is preventive maintenance.
If you had a fancy new car but never did any sort of preventive maintenance to keep it in tip-top shape, you would not have a nice car for too long. It would quickly become broken down.
The same is true in life. We need self care to stay our “best selves”.
Continuously practicing preventative maintenance regarding all areas of your health and taking an active approach to your own well-being will allow you to cope with potential illness and disability in a partnership manner with your healthcare provider and regain control over your life.
Let’s look at how you can do this.
7 Types of Self-Care and How to Practice Them
1. Physical Self Care
This type of self-care is the one that you’re most likely already familiar with. Physical self-care isn’t just about meeting your basic needs of food, water, sleep, and shelter. But it’s also not just about getting pedicures and massages every day. There are several dos and don’ts when it comes to physical self-care that you can practice to ensure your body is functioning at its best.
This means getting regular exercise, eating healthy foods, staying hydrated, practicing proper hand-washing and other hygiene habits, and giving your body the proper rest that it needs. When you prioritize physical self-care, you give your body the best opportunity to operate efficiently and effectively.
You become powered by natural energy when practicing physical self-care, which allows you to feel healthy and capable. Your immune system will be strengthened, which will aid your body in fighting off illnesses–meaning you will be sick less frequently and for shorter amounts of time than you would if you didn’t practice physical self-care.
But practicing physical self-care also means avoiding certain things, such as drugs, alcohol, excessive sugar, and anything else that can either harm your health or make you feel icky. This means being intentional about your bedtime, not pushing through your workday when you’re feeling sick, and going to regular doctor and dentist checkups to prevent health setbacks.
As long as you’re practicing physical self-care, you will be putting yourself in a good position to practice self-care in other domains of your life.
How to get started:
Simple Daily Physical Self-Care Ideas:
Bubble bath
Exercise
Healthcare Appointments
Healthy Diet
Hydration
Massage
Meal Prepping
Medication
Naps
Physical Activity
Restorative Yoga
Sleep
2. Emotional Self Care
Practicing emotional self-care will help you connect with your emotions, helping you process and handle them in a healthy manner.
When you practice emotional self-care, you can react to your feelings responsibly and constructively. Emotional self-care also involves practicing self-compassion and acceptance to help you maintain a healthy inner dialogue.
When you prioritize emotional self-care, you build the mental strength and resilience to overcome everyday challenges. Practicing emotional self-care requires acknowledging your unhealthy coping habits and learning how to replace them with healthier responses.
It’s about taking the time to compassionately approach your feelings so you can effectively handle emotional setbacks. You can talk to a close friend about your feelings or make time to do leisurely activities that can help you learn how to process your emotions.
How to get started with emotional self-care:
3. Social Self Care
Social self-care is essential to maintaining one’s mental and emotional well-being.
Engaging in meaningful social interactions helps to reduce feelings of loneliness and isolation, fostering a sense of belonging and community.
By connecting with others, individuals can share experiences, lend support, and develop lasting relationships that provide a crucial support network during times of stress or hardship. This connectivity not only nurtures emotional health but also encourages the development of empathy and understanding, facilitating personal growth.
Maintaining supportive relationships is a critical part of optimizing your mental health.
In addition to emotional benefits, social self-care positively impacts mental health by reducing stress and increasing happiness and life satisfaction.
Socializing with friends, family, or like-minded communities can release endorphins and other neurotransmitters, which contribute to improved mood and reduced anxiety. Furthermore, participating in social activities offers opportunities for relaxation, laughter, and fun—essential components of a balanced lifestyle.
Engaging socially encourages individuals to break away from daily routines, providing a refreshing escape that fosters mental rejuvenation.
Lastly, social self-care contributes to the enrichment of personal skills and development. Interacting with diverse groups of people exposes individuals to new perspectives and ideas, promoting cognitive flexibility and learning.
These interactions can spark creativity and innovation, which are valuable in personal endeavors and professional settings. Building and maintaining strong social connections can enhance communication skills, improve teamwork, and empower individuals to navigate various social situations more effectively.
Thus, prioritizing social self-care is integral to a holistic approach to health and wellness, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and enriched life. It is a key to emotional well-being.
How to get started working on your social self care:
Set boundaries for yourself so you can find the right balance between spending time socializing and practicing personal self-care
Be proactive and take initiative by inviting friends along to do things you want to do instead of waiting for an invitation.
Make time to spend some time with close connections. Choose quality over quantity when it comes to social interactions.
At a bare minimum, set time aside for weekly calls with close friends and family.
4. Mental/Intellectual Self-Care
Keeping your mind sharp and continuously challenging your cognition greatly influences your psychological well-being, which is where mental self-care comes in. Anything you can do to fuel your mind and make you think in new ways will help you stay inspired to be a lifelong learner.
Taking the time to learn something new can recharge your brain and re-energize your desire to learn. Being intentional about exposing yourself to new ideas can not only give you a better sense of mental acuity, it can also help you feel like you’ve accomplished something. This type of self-care is especially important during a quarantine where you’re at risk of feeling cognitively stagnant. Mental self-care will help assure that you continue growing, even when the world seems to have come to a halt.
Read a book for fun. (not something for professional growth)
Playing chess can be a great way to unwind and stimulate your brain.
Write something. Whether journaling or trying your hand at fiction or even blogging. Writing is a great way to work through your issues and bring clarity to your mind.
5. Financial Self Care
Having a calm mind when your finances are a train wreck is nearly impossible.
Financial self-care involves reducing your financial stress by ridding yourself of bad spending habits and taking control of your money. Living with financial worries can impact all areas of your life, leading to stress, anxiety, and depression.
When people struggle financially, they tend to ruminate about it, which leads to worsening negativity that turns into a cycle of overall pessimism.
Practicing financial self-care can make it easier to deal with your finances by making sure you’re tracking your income versus your spending. Whether you rely on a financial planning app, listen to a personal finance podcast, or manually record all of your spending, you can practice economic self-love to help reduce your overall stress.
No one will dispute the stress involved with having financial trouble, and practicing financial self-care may not always apply to your life if you’re struggling with unemployment or having trouble making ends meet. And while self-care won’t change these situations for you, it can help you correct how you handle them.
Your relationship with money may look very different from your best friend’s, but you need to define how your finances shape your life and find a way to manage your money so your money doesn’t manage you.
How to get started:
6. Professional Self Care
Professional self-care is meant to reduce the stress surrounding your career. I struggle to find a healthy work-life balance, so professional self-care is important to me. It makes my working hours more efficient and helps me set boundaries that mark the end of work and the start of home.
When reading through how you can practice career self-care, you may think that some don’t apply to you or your profession.
For example, I can’t tell you the last time I didn’t take a “working” lunch–but these things are important to everyone. No one’s job is more important than their well-being because as soon as your well-being suffers, so will your performance at work. But if you have a sense of purpose at work and make sure your career goals are SMART, you should be able to clarify that line between your time and your work time.
How to get started:
7. Spiritual Self Care
No matter your spiritual beliefs, you can practice self-care through spirituality. Whether or not you consider yourself religious, caring for your soul is equally as important as caring for other aspects of yourself, and allowing all facets of your life to work together is a critical component of happiness.
You can have a spiritual experience even when wholly consumed in your favorite activity. So, like many other sectors of life, this can look different for everyone. You may find that you have strong mental breakthroughs when you’re transitioning between yoga poses, or you feel exceptionally connected to the earth when you follow your intuition, or you feel you’re living your purpose when you engage in meditation or spend time in nature.
Spiritual self-care involves anything you can do to tap into your spiritual side.
How to get started:
Final Thoughts on Types of Self-Care and How to Practice Them
Making yourself a priority will help you become the best version of yourself, and knowing what self-care works best for you is a start.
Whenever you start feeling burned out or a bit overwhelmed, take a minute to think about which type of self-care you might need to spend some time nurturing and get to it! With time, you’ll have a self-care routine that allows you to achieve both balance and clarity in your life, which will reduce stress and help you function at your best.
Connie Mathers is a professional editor and freelance writer. She holds a Bachelor’s Degree in Marketing and a Master’s Degree in Social Work. When she is not writing, Connie is either spending time with her daughter and two dogs, running, or working at her full-time job as a social worker in Richmond, VA.
Is there anything better than going to the hair salon and having a head massage at the basin? No, I didn’t think so. It is one of my highlights when getting my hair done and I will be honest the quality of the massage is a deal breaker for me. But, it’s not just the skilled hands that make this part of visiting the salon so enticing, there’s a long tradition of head massage called Champi, which in Ayurvedic culture promotes hair growth, improves circulation and can help reduce your stress levels.
Thanks to TikTok we have seen a massive increase in the discussion of hair oiling, with many attributing increased growth and overall hair health improvement to this ancient technique. But this isn’t just a social media trend, there’s thousands of years of practice to back it up. One of the key brands bringing its south Asian traditions to the mass market is Inde Wilde. Founded by Diipa Buller-Khosia, she wanted to bring the beauty practices and ingredients passed down from her family to as many people as she could, this month the brand has become available in all Sephora UK stores and online. One of its key products is the Inde Wilde Champi Hair Oil (£29)
Buller-Khosia’s mother, Sangitha Khosla is the creator of the brand’s original hair oil formula and one of Buller-Khosia’s biggest inspirations. Her Rapunzel length hair is attributed to regular hair oiling. Before I was introduced to Buller-Khosia I thought hair oiling was just adding oil to your hair and letting it marinate, but after finding out how to use this product to improve my self-care routine I have fallen in love with it. Now when I use hair oil it is almost like a form of meditation, I feel relaxed and the swishiness (is that a word?) of my locks, let alone the scent, after using Inde Wilde Champi Hair Oil has me a bit addicted.
Read on to find out how to hair oil correctly, and I bet you will become addicted to this ancient practice too.
Step-by-Step Guide to Hair Oiling At-Home
1. Brush Your Hair
This will help to detangle the strands and allow the oil to naturally spread throughout your hair. Plus it will help you to easily reach your scalp when you massage. Buller-Khosia recommends using a neem comb – wide toothed comb – to brush through your hair. This acts as an anti-inflammatory tool for your scalp, preventing scalp infections and increasing the blood circulation of the scalp.
2. Warm up your Champi Hair Oil
Place the bottle in a warm bowl of water. Heating up the oil will allow for easy absorption into the scalp, so it can penetrate deeply.
3. Identify your Marma Points
These are acupressure points used in ayurvedic medicine – Adhipati (at the top of the head), Simanta (at the back of the head), and Kritika (toward the bottom where the head meets the neck).
4. Apply Acupressure
This is a light pressure onto these points in a circular movement, starting from the top of the head, and working your way down to the neck.
5. Close Your Eyes
According to Buller-Khosia this is when you should close your eyes and focus on your breathing, she also suggests repeating positive meditation affirmations to yourself to set the intention of good, happy, and healthy hair.
6. Massage with your Champi Hair Oil
Separate your hair section by section and apply one pipette of champi oil along your scalp, from the top of the head down. Repeat to cover all sections of the hair. Use circular motions with your fingertips, as you would when showering, to deeply yet gently massage the oil into the scalp.
7. Ensure Your Scalp is Covered
Massage your full scalp all the way down to the sides of your ears and the back of your neck.
8. Avoid Vigorous Rubbing
Always be gentle. Imagine you are slowly massaging your hair follicles to wake up and grow.
9. Repeat…
Practice the Champi head massage and oil technique at least once a week to see results.
Lauren Ezekiel is an associate editor at PS UK, where she writes about all things beauty and wellness. With a degree in journalism and 12 years’ experience as a beauty editor at a leading Sunday supplement, she is obsessed with skincare, hair and makeup, and is often found offering advice to innocent bystanders. Her work has been published in Grazia, OK, Health and Beauty, The Sun, ASDA, Dare and Metro.
There’s a saying that self confidence is a super power. Once you start to believe in yourself, magic starts happening. Definitely, confidence means feeling sure of yourself and your abilities. But how does one go about radiating confidence. Here are some self-care practices that can help you transform into a confident person. ~ Ed.
Self-care is not just some hipster term du jour, it is key for boosting self-esteem and self-improvement. Practicing self-care helps you heal yourself not just on a physical level, but also in aspects of your mental health, emotional health, and spiritual health.
Such an approach toward self-care ultimately gives you the courage to stand tall despite this reality and let your inner strength express itself as a pure light that exudes confidence— which others seemingly cannot escape.
12 Transformative Self-Care Practices
This article will examine some life-changing self-care practices that will help you shine confidence from your core.
Practice Mindfulness to Promote Mental Health
However, one of the most effective self-care practices out there is mindfulness. This means fully living in the moment, not judging yourself for what you are thinking and feeling or perceiving. This will help reduce stress and increase attention and mindfulness in your emotions.
Clarity of mind gives you the mental strength to take on challenges and live with a composed tranquil mind. Gradually, this mental control would be an excellent way to build your self-confidence as you can manage your life turbulence easily.
Practice Positive Self-Talk
Confidence is the language you use with yourself. Many people fall into negative self-talk which leads to lower levels of self-esteem and ultimately limits their success. The only way to feed confidence is to shut the door on negative thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations.
Every day remind yourself of your strengths, successes, and all that you can accomplish. This way, you can better stave off any naysaying thoughts and conquer challenges with more confidence as a byproduct. Confidence comes from inside out and it begins with self-talk.
Fill Your Body with the Good Stuff
One of the primary self-care tips is to make yourself physically well by eating a balanced diet, staying hydrated, and getting regular exercise. The right diet and exercise will give you energy and keep you in a good mood, all of which improve your confidence.
Exercise can also release endorphins, which are natural lifters of our mood. Both your physical body health and emotional health will be enhanced through movement whether that is a morning yoga routine or walking with the dog in nature.
Establish Regular Sleeping Patterns
Sleep can do wonders in terms of transforming you confidence-wise. Good, proper sleep is the key to a clear thinking process. Try to regulate your emotions and stay healthy. Rested means you are present, aware, and capable of navigating a curve ball easily. Create a calming pre-bedtime ritual — whether it is reading, meditating, or practicing gratitude that allows you to relax and get ready for a good night’s sleep. Also, this keeps you in a good mood, and productive and enhances your confidence as well.
Personal style as Self-Expression
Your style is also a reflection of your confidence. This is all to say if you wear something that reflects who and how you are when no one is looking, it will always make a good day better. Whether or not you are into fashion trends, and you would feel 100 percent as comfortable in this tank if it were made two weeks ago or ten years ago, wearing clothes that give you a natural “superwoman” or “superman” feeling can seriously help your self-esteem.
One of the examples is certainly hair – trying out new hairstyles, like baby bangs or micro bangs, can be fun and you’ll feel better in your skin (just make sure you know what the difference between baby bangs and micro bangs is).
Establish Boundaries to Guard Your Energy
Boundary setting is integral to self-care, particularly with your time and energy. This is an excellent step towards securing your mental health and a better deed for your self-esteem as well. Picking the right person, place and thing gives you the energy to focus on what matters.
Often it is the word “no” that gives you the power to put yourself first and live a life that works for you emotionally. This over time builds self-esteem by your confidence in controlling your life to maintain pieces.
Boosting Your Confidence with Skill Building
This may require you to learn new competencies or increase proficiency in existing ones. Something I have learned is doing something new boosts your self-esteem and makes you feel good about yourself.
Be it a follow through on a distant whim of wanting to take up some course learning that language you always wanted to or getting good at your hobbies — the act of growing can in itself change your perspective. You become more competent when you focus on becoming better at what you do through self-improvement in education and skill-building which in turn, increases your confidence.
Foster Healthy Relationships
Your support system massively contributes to your self-esteem and overall happiness. Good, positive relationships help give us energy and feed our ego while toxic/poisonous relationships diminish us. Look at your relationships as a part of self-care, and judge if any are serving you well.
Spend more time nurturing relationships with those who uplift you and encourage your growth and less time around those who can only bring negativity. This makes you feel stronger and be able to live a more beloved life.
Practice Gratitude Daily
One of the easiest habits that can have the most dramatic impact on your way of thinking and sense of self is gratitude. Spending a little time daily to think about what you are thankful for can shift your awareness from a scarcity mindset, the things that are missing in your life, to an abundance mindset or all things positive.
This changed perspective also unleashes negativity and the birth of a happier, more holy life that no longer consists of dwells on negative circumstances. Give thanks for what you have, not focusing on what you wish were different, and confidence will come naturally.
Prioritize Self-Reflection
Such an honest self-reflection is fundamental to growth. Reflecting on the lessons you learned, how far you have come, and your emotional growth provides perspective on these patterns.
This reflection is essential in identifying things you can do better and celebrating victories, big or small. You could do things like journaling, meditating, or just introspect a bit more regularly. The more you know about yourself, the easier your decisions will be.
Create a Self-Care Ritual
Self-care becomes a ritual of receptiveness. Then it can be a day at the spa once a week, to spend some time outdoors in nature every day, or your joyful hobby that you do every single day; they all give a sense of grounding and peace.
These rituals give you the intensity to replenish and reconnect with your being. With regular practice of these habits, they become gentle reminders to yourself about the value you bring and how important it is for you to trust in them.
Be Compassionate to Yourself
Finally, one of the most powerful forms of self-care that you can cultivate is to simply be nice to yourself. When things don´t go as expected it is very easy to put ourselves down but practicing self-compassion helps you realize that we all make mistakes and it´s ok… this is being human.
Give yourself as much grace as you give others, and accept that it is through setbacks and mistakes that we grow. Confidence is not perfection, confidence is believing that you can face a challenge and keep pushing forward.
Over to You
What is your plan for daily self-care to help you expand your sphere of confidence? Take a moment to reflect on which of these habits resonates most for you and how you might integrate them into your day bit by bit. It starts with that very first step onto the path of being your most confident and empowered self. What will yours be?
In conclusion, incorporate these life-changing self-care habits into your daily routine and before you know it, you will become both a more confident person and one that is truly happy and healthy. Reminder: Self-care is not self-indulgent; it is essential for growth and mental health. The more you practice, the higher your vibrations of confidence expand to every corner of your life.
Disclaimer: Though the views expressed are of the author’s own, this article has been checked for its authenticity of information and resource links provided for a better and deeper understanding of the subject matter. However, you’re suggested to make your diligent research and consult subject experts to decide what is best for you. If you spot any factual errors, spelling, or grammatical mistakes in the article, please report at [email protected]. Thanks.
To help you make this happen in your life, I have outlined below some of my go-to “rules” and also my favourite ways to indulge during those 60 minutes of true “me time”.
The Three Rules of the Nap-Time Self-Care Game
1. Get Over The Stress of Time
This is easier said than done. One of the things that is so tricky for me personally is figuring out what to do with my time on the weekends when my boy goes down for his nap. I nearly always end up with FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), if I don’t plan in advance how I am going to use my time during each of the precious naps.
My non-negotiable mom self-care tip: Choose one nap in the week that is 100% for you and your needs.
Set aside that nap and if you don’t have the defining nap to take advantage of, then your goal is to find that one hour that can be all yours. They key is to mark off that time in your week and commit to it as if it’s the most important meeting in your calendar.
Monday to Friday I work, some days from home and some days from my office. My one nap that is mine and mine alone is usually the first nap of the day on Saturday or Sunday. I commit to it in advance and plan out how I will use it.
2. You Must Turn Off Your Phone
I don’t want to hear any ‘buts’ about this. We are all guilty of mindlessly scrolling on our phones, wasting more time than I like to think about. What is it that we are looking for? And do you feel better or worse after having spent your time doing this? Watching mindless television or wasting away our time double tapping things on our phones may feel relaxing because you are not actively doing anything at all. The reality is that it is just the opposite. We are triggering our nervous system, increasing our level of fatigue and maybe most importantly as it relates to what we’re talking about here, it takes you away from the present moment. The whole point of this practice is to be present and indulge. Turn off those phones. It will be there waiting for you when you get back.
3. Making It Work At Home
Sure, I could suggest loads of out-of-the-home self-care options, but the name of the game here is to assume you have a little one sleeping and have just 60 minutes. Out of the house stuff usually also requires travel time so we’re confining ourselves to the space we are in.
8 Ways To Maximize Self-Care in An Hour Or Less
1. Home Spa Experience
This is my personal favourite so it goes first. I lock myself in the bathroom, start running a bath, pull out all of my favourite personal care products that I don’t get to use often enough and start taking care of me. I personally opt for Living Libations* products as the essential oils truly make it feel like a spa-like experience. Use what you have, lay them out, and determine your personal order of operations. The photo above was taken on Mother’s Day.
This is my line-up:
2. One Hour of Yoga or Physical Activity of Your Choice
30 minutes of yoga is easier to squeeze in. Even 45 minutes is doable. There is something magical that happens when you keep your body moving for a full 60 minutes. I am not on the up and up for online workouts, but a few of my favourite online movement hubs include:
3. Take Your Own Nap For Goodness Sake
Make it count. I am the world’s worst napper but if I am tired enough, I may sleep. Often I end up just laying there with my eyes closed but do still feel rejuvenated. There is one key secret to a daytime nap. The sleep mask. Get yourself a cotton (and cotton or wool filled!) sleep mask. It’s a dream-maker. I have found great ones on Etsy and I use them for naps and nighttime sleep.
4. Meditate
I have been meditating for twelve years and am not even close to desiring to sit for sixty minutes. You don’t have to. That’s not the point. Maybe you sit for ten or twenty or thirty minutes. But create your ritual around it so that you really get into it deep. Perhaps you start with five minutes of deep breathing, then your 20 minutes of meditation, 20 minutes of shavasana (everyone’s favourite yoga pose), and then journal. There is your sixty minutes. What’s truly magical about meditation is though you may feel anxious at the time, that is the feeling of stresses and anxieties bubbling to the surface and untangling. Stay with it. The benefit of meditation comes from the practice itself, not the results. Trust that the results are happening even if you don’t feel them in the moment. With meditation, you’re playing the long game.
5. Do Something Creative
Remember once upon a time when you had hobbies? Me too! I am trying to cultivate mine again, but it’s not easy finding the time. Creative projects nourish different parts of the brain than we use when we work or do day-to-day activities. Whether it’s playing an instrument, creating a recipe or doing a craft project – it all counts. My crafts of late involve crocheting and macramé and I love the latter because a macramé plant holder is a project I can start, enjoy and complete in under an hour. I also recently killed a nap-time craft of sewing a washable stroller cover. The joys of the simple things.
So whether your craft is colouring in a colouring book, making a friendship bracelet, crafting in a scrapbook or any other number of creative endeavours, remember what you used to do with your free time and start doing it. Every moment spent doing something that nourishes your soul is a deposit in the happiness account.
6. Get Outside in the Sunshine
You need a yard, porch or balcony for this one but if you do have access, fresh air and sunshine by yourself is invaluable in regenerating the spirit. Perhaps you have a book you want to read (ideally not on sleep habits, feeding your baby or other parenting things), but that is pure fun. Sit in the sun and read this book, or drink that tea, or eat your lunch. We have a baby monitor that we use just for this purpose.
7. Plant Stuff
Maybe this isn’t directly related to your self-care, but caring for plants, repotting them, watering them, grooming them, maybe even getting fancy and propagating them can be supremely nourishing. Plants are a very new thing in my world and I’ve spent more than one nap reviewing my plant inventory and determining what I am doing wrong that seems to be killing all of them. Plants boost air quality in your home and improve mental and emotional well-being. Studies show that interacting with indoor plants suppresses psychological stress.
8. Take A Long Shower, Apply Products And Put On Fresh Clothes
This may seem like a silly one, but trust me. On most days, my showers feel more like running through a sprinkler. So when I am in dire need of some alone time, while also need to use nap time to prepare to leave the house, this is it. Similar to the Home Spa I outlined above, my long shower self-care routine includes:
Make It Happen
Don’t ever feel guilty about taking this time for yourself. Guilt is never worth your energy. You deserve this a thousand times over. As mothers we give, give, give. If we don’t take some time to replenish our own stores, fill our tank a little, we will be running on empty. That is when overwhelm will hit us the hardest. Aim to set aside one hour per week that is yours, all yours. Own it. Enjoy it. You are amazing. Celebrate this. Some weeks will undoubtedly challenge you more than others. Some days you may feel like you are just slaying it all. The ebbs and flows of motherhood will never fail to bring us to our knees but I do believe this only lends us the opportunity to look up, and rise up higher than we ever thought possible. And it all begins with caring for ourselves.
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Middle age, often defined as the years between 40 and 65, is a time of significant transition for many women. It’s a period marked by physical, emotional, and social changes, which can ripple through all aspects of life, particularly emotional health and relationships. I am a middle-aged women (funny that it is still hard to say that aloud), and I can fully attest to the surge of introspection, questions about priorities, life direction, who I choose to give my time to and preoccupation with my son launching in the next year.
We are particularly susceptible to emotional challenges, with factors such as hormonal fluctuations, empty nest syndrome, caregiving responsibilities, and career changes all contributing to increased stress and emotional turmoil. Additionally, relationship dynamics may shift during this time, with marital satisfaction often declining and shifts in friendships.
While these transitions can be challenging, they also present incredible opportunities for growth and self-discovery. By understanding the common emotional and relationship challenges we face and adopting effective coping strategies, women can navigate this phase of life with greater resilience and emotional well-being.
Emotional Challenges & Strategies:
Hormonal fluctuations: The perimenopause and menopause transition can trigger a range of emotional symptoms, including mood swings, anxiety, and depression. Lifestyle changes such as regular exercise, a healthy diet, and adequate sleep can help manage these symptoms. Seeking medical professionals with a focus on this time of life is also an option.
Empty nest syndrome: When children leave home, it can leave parents feeling a sense of loss and sadness. It’s important to acknowledge these feelings and find new ways to fill the void, such as pursuing hobbies, volunteering, or reconnecting with friends.
Caregiving responsibilities: Many middle-aged women find themselves caring for aging parents or other family members. This can be emotionally and physically draining. Seeking support from other family members, friends, or professional caregivers can help ease the burden.
Career changes: Some women may experience career transitions in middle age, whether due to retirement, downsizing, or a desire for a change. It’s important to explore new opportunities and set new goals to maintain a sense of purpose and fulfillment.
Relationship Challenges & Strategies
Marital satisfaction: Studies have shown that marital satisfaction can declines in middle age, as reflected in communication problems, unmet emotional needs, intimacy/sexual issues and changes in roles. All of this can be improved with adequate attention to the issues (rather than sweeping them under the rug), spending quality time together, and seeking couples counseling if needed.
Evolving friendships: As life circumstances change, friendships may also evolve. It’s important to nurture existing friendships while also being open to making new connections. In this phase of life, it’s not uncommon to feel moved to re-evaluate friendships for more quality over quantity.
Dating after divorce or widowhood: For women who find themselves single in middle age, dating can be daunting. It’s important to work through any unresolved grief or loss to be emotionally available and ready. Take things slow.
Additional Strategies for Emotional Well-being:
Mindfulness and meditation: These practices can help manage stress, anxiety, and depression by promoting self-awareness and emotional regulation.
Therapy or counseling: Talking to a therapist can provide a safe space to explore feelings, work through any emotional wounds, develop coping strategies and get support.
Social connections: Maintaining strong social connections is an integral part of emotional health. Make an effort to spend time with friends and family, join social groups, or volunteer in your community.
Self-care: Prioritize activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as reading, listening to music, taking a bath, or spending time in nature. Identify what self-care is for you and make it a part of your routine.
Middle age is a time of significant transition, but it doesn’t have to be a time of emotional turmoil. By understanding the common challenges and adopting effective coping strategies, women can navigate this phase of life with grace and resilience. One of the most important things I’m doing to help navigate this time is to form a team of my most beloved and trusted allies. Consider who might be on your team. It’s never too late to prioritize your emotional health and cultivate fulfilling relationships.
Lastly, it’s also never too late to do work through unresolved wounds stemming from childhood via family of origin work in therapy. You’ll be in the best shape possible to successfully transition through this phase if you are as baggage-free as possible.
Have you been feeling a little bit off lately? If you’re experiencing energy crashes, constant hunger and acne breakouts, a low-carb lifestyle may be what you need. Explore what it means to transition to low-carb living, including tips on easy recipes and practical steps you need to take to make this happen.
The shift towards low-carb living
With all the talk about low-carb food, you’re probably wondering what all this buzz is about. The discussion has recently grown because people are experiencing the consequences of poor eating habits and are turning to low-carb diets to reclaim their health.
The science behind it
This lifestyle has gained popularity for its potential to help manage weight and control blood sugar levels. When you consume fewer carbs, you lower your insulin levels, which studies in the HHS Public Access journal have shown is effective in weight loss.
Another factor is that if you eat less carbs, you’ll most likely make up for it by increasing the amount of fat and protein in your diet. This helps you feel full for longer and consume fewer calories. Due to these health claims, a wide variety of people are trying to go low-carb — from athletes to those wanting to lose weight or manage their diabetes.
Take precautions
Despite these potential benefits, a low-carb diet should be done with precaution. There are side effects if you overdo it — overeating protein can worsen kidney function, increase cholesterol and cause constipation. Please consult with a healthcare professional before making any major changes to your diet, especially if you have pre-existing health concerns.
Practical steps for transitioning to a low-carb lifestyle
If you want to start a healthier lifestyle, integrate small changes rather than a complete overhaul. That way, you’ll be more likely to stick with these new habits.
Do your research
First, it’s important to understand that not all low-carbs are good for you. Simple carbs like white sugar or flour spike your blood sugar, making you hungry faster. You avoid that with complex carbs found in more nutritious food like whole grains, as it takes longer for these types of carbs to digest.
That’s why that cookie or beer on paper may seem like it fits within the diet’s parameters, but to improve your health, you should focus on whole food. Fresh vegetables and lean meats will become your best friend.
Easy low-carb meals
With that in mind, start making substitutions around your kitchen. Replace white rice with finely chopped cauliflower for a meal or two. Sprinkle in some chia seeds in your yogurt bowl. Switch your seed oil with olive oil. These substitutions may seem small, but they establish healthy eating habits that change a low-carb diet from a fad to a sustainable lifestyle.
Listen to your body
A big part of transitioning to a low-carb lifestyle is personalizing it to your body. Explore what feels right and what doesn’t. For example, you may like the keto diet — a more restrictive low-carb diet that limits carbs to 20 to 50 grams daily. Here, your focus will be on consuming high-fat, moderate-protein and low-carb foods. With that criteria, you’re probably wondering if anything meets those standards, but you can still enjoy foods like Greek yogurt, fish, eggs, cottage cheese and meat.
There are also plenty of keto-friendly recipes that can replace staples like bread. Try making this farmers bread that is low-carb, gluten-free and diabetic-friendly. The secret ingredient is potato fiber flour. It tastes like real bread but with extra fiber and minimal carbs. Exploring these alternatives helps to break carb-centric eating habits and replace them with healthy low-carb food.
Shift in social activities
A lot of social activities revolve around eating carb-heavy foods, like going for drinks and pub food. This can get expensive and unhealthy, especially if you’re eating out multiple times a week. Consider shifting some social activities beyond just meals. Explore new hiking trails, try out dance classes or even pottery lessons. With these hobbies, you don’t have to resort to restaurants every time you want to catch up with a friend.
Incorporating low-carb living into daily routines
Picking up routines like meal prepping and regular exercise helps support a low-carb lifestyle. These rituals make sure that you continue to prioritize your health and well-being in the long term.
Meal prep
Meal planning helps you stay on track to avoid the temptation to order takeout. Stocking up a low-carb pantry ensures you have everything on hand for your meals. Keto or low-carb flour and pasta are essentials, as well as milk substitutes like almond or coconut milk. Consider having healthy snacks, too, for when you feel like munching on something before your next meal.
Thai tofu collard wraps are a fun meal to make ahead of time for a fresh and delicious lunch. Just blanch collard leaves and fill them up with tofu, cucumber, carrot and Thai basil. Make some peanut sauce on the side for the perfect dip.
Active lifestyle
Getting more active doesn’t have to be as intimidating as signing up for a gym membership. It can look like going on walks after a meal or doing light yoga stretches in the morning. Make it a social activity and gather your friends or coworkers for a volleyball intramural. Find whatever is enjoyable for you.
Why low-carb living matters beyond weight loss
The benefits of this lifestyle extend beyond how it affects the scale. According to StatsPearls, adopting a low-carb diet can help reduce energy crashes by replacing simple carbs with healthy fats and protein. With more consistent energy levels throughout the day, you’ll be less prone to taking those afternoon naps that ruin the flow of your day.
Studies in StatsPearls have also shown that keto diets can help manage acne, polycystic ovary syndrome — commonly known as PCOS — and Alzheimer’s.
Although there are studies that show the short-term benefits of keto diets, there has been limited research on their long-term effects. This emphasizes the need to be mindful of how you approach this lifestyle, as its restrictive nature may not be for everyone.
Breaking free from carb-centric habits
A low-carb lifestyle can give you the opportunity to reclaim your health if you do it right. There are plenty of delicious low-carb meals that make healthy eating easy and sustainable. Try out this lifestyle for yourself by starting with small habits that will ensure success in the long run.
Zuzana Paar is the creative force behind her websites Low Carb No Carb, and Best Clean Eating.
6 Tips for Preserving Your Independence in Love and Relationships
You can read the blog below or watch it on YouTube by clicking here.
Over the years, as a single woman over 50, you’ve had to learn how to be strong and independent.
There was no other choice if you – or you and your kids were going to be ok.
Now you want a man in your life.
But a little piece is tugging at you wondering if you bring someone into your life, will you have to give up the independence you’ve worked so hard to achieve.
This concern is real and that’s why today I want to share 6 tips about how you can find love with a good man and still firmly hold onto your independence.
Tip #1 – Understanding Your Fear
The fear of losing your independence in a relationship often comes from past experiences.
Think about your parents marriage before Women’s Lib or the TV show’s you watched as a kid where a woman self-sacrificed to accommodate her spouses needs.
Maybe this happened in your marriage as well and when you think of being in a relationship with a new man, it brings up the fear of losing your independence again.
It’s perfectly okay to feel a little hesitant—everyone does!
But I want you to remember, you’re in charge of your life, and any relationship you choose can respect your space and the way you live.
And it starts with . . .
Tip #2 – Setting Boundaries
Boundaries help you feel safe and comfortable.
As you’re getting to know someone, you’ll want to talk about what you’re okay with and what you need in terms of alone time and doing your own thing.
I remember going out with a man who wanted someone around all the time.
I’m pretty independent so I knew this would be too much for me.
We became friends and hung out from time to time when neither of us was dating which was great.
By sharing your boundaries and what works for you, it helps the two of you create a healthy relationship that includes plenty of room for love but also for you to be yourself.
Tip #3 – Maintaining Your Lifestyle
A common concern is that a new relationship will upend your existing lifestyle.
Remember, you’re the architect of your life.
It’s important for you to continue engaging in activities you love, whether it’s working, pursuing hobbies, or hanging out with friends.
Integrating a partner into your life does not mean abandoning your routine; it’s about finding someone who complements your lifestyle, not overtakes it.
Tip #4 – Communicating Your Needs
Communication is vital in any relationship, especially when it comes to preserving your independence.
You want to remember that men are not mind readers. (yes, it would be amazing if they were mind readers but when let’s face it, we aren’t either)
And that’s why you’ll want to be with a man you feel comfortable expressing your needs, your non-negotiables, and your vision for a relationship so the two of you can create one that works for BOTH OF YOU.
Tip #5 – Choosing the Right Partner
The right man will make you feel more like yourself, not less.
He will champion your independence rather than challenge it.
When you find a man who enriches your life without encroaching on your autonomy, you’ll know the balance is just right.
Finding a man who values his independence as much as you do can be a game-changer.
Tip #6 – Embracing Interdependence
Being independent is great, but working together with someone can make things even better.
This kind of teamwork means you can still take care of yourself while also getting help and improving your life with the support of a partner.
I hope these 6 Tips have given you peace of mind that being in a loving relationship does not mean you have to surrender your independence.
Instead, it’s an opportunity to bring someone into your world who adds to it without diminishing who you are.
And that can be a wonderful experience that respects your independence and allows you to write a new chapter in your life, one with companionship and personal freedom holding equal weight in your love story.
Believing in You!
Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .
💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.
If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:
1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.
2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, “The Winning Dating Formula.” It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.
3. Join our Finding Love after 50 Facebook group to find camaraderie and connection. It is a warm and welcoming space to share your journey and receive support every step of the way. Click here to become part of our community.
4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.
Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹
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Some days are crazy than others, but by folding in some self-care daily, every day can be more positive.
Not everyday can be easy, fun and productive, but with a little effort, it doesn’t have to be a full on miserable 24 hours. Some days are more stressful and difficult, but there are a few things you can do to mitigate it helping both your physical and mental health. Routine is key as it is tough to remind ourselves to think of ourselves. Especially since most find it easier to default and spend time scrolling screens.
As kids, we are taught behavior through repetition. Many educators find children respond well to a routine because research tells us consistent, positive practices can reduce anxiety. Most people fall into some form of pattern, which may not be helpful or healthy. Adding points throughout the day to jar our body into something positive. Here is how to add daily self-care.
Find one thing positive
Every day find at least one thing positive to appreciate. Be it a good cup of coffee, music while in the shower, smiling at people, you will see it will have an almost immediate impact. Mix it up to help your brain register positive feedback throughout the day. It could even be allowing yourself to laugh at one dad joke a day.
Go outside
Fresh air and movement are two things which help the body adjust. Despite the weather, it is lift for the brain. It not only cleans your lungs, it can also boost your mood, lower your heart rate, increase energy levels and even improve digestion. Take a few minutes everyday to talk a short walk, it doesn’t have to be long, around the block, from the back of the parking lot, or from one building to the next. The brace of the air will is good and the exercise will help your body recalibrate.
Photo by Lua Valentia via Unsplash
Find a mental happy spot
While meditation is one way to help be calm, it isn’t the only way. Meditation can be practiced whenever you have some quiet and the ability to close your eyes and breathe deeply for a few minutes.
You can also find your happy place in thoughts, reflecting or planning a favorite trip, a certain hobby or spot, making a favorite dish or planning your dream meal. Shower time is the perfect space to do this, setting aside a couple of minutes where you can contemplate life alone with no sound except for the water (or singing if it is your happy place).
Despite the many ways a mobile can help your life, it can also be the giver of the bearer of bad news. Emails, calls, etc all causing disruption. Set limits – only look at it for set amount of time in the morning. Instead of scrolling screens with news, play solataire/patience. Find a time of day when you don’t need it, like when you’re focused on something, such as reading, stretching or watching a show. Put your phone down near you or keep it out of sight completely.
Most of all, make sure you and your phone don’t sleep together. Give it a gentle good night at least 20 minutes before you head to sleep.
As the spring plants bloom, it’s the perfect time to celebrate all the maternal figures in our lives, who support us through every stage of growth. Whether they are biological mothers, adoptive mothers, stepmothers, grandmothers, aunts or friends, Mother’s Day is an opportunity to reflect on the importance of appreciation and self-care for these amazing people.
Nurturing moms through self-care
Motherhood is no easy feat and in the midst of caring for others, moms tend to overlook their own needs. But just like anyone else, moms thrive when they prioritize their own well-being too. Mental and physical self-care are essential for maintaining balance and resilience throughout life’s ups and downs.
Mental self-care: Encourage moms you know to practice mindfulness and stress-reduction techniques like meditation, journaling or simply taking uninterrupted time for any activity they enjoy. Setting aside a portion of the day for themselves can help mitigate feelings of overwhelm and improve overall mental health.
Physical self-care: We all understand the importance of staying active, eating well, and getting enough sleep. But let’s be honest — keeping up with these habits consistently is no walk in the park, especially for busy moms. However, even small steps can make a big difference. Squeezing in a 10 minute walk outside or opting for a nutritious snack instead of a sugary one can have a big impact on energy levels and mood.
Creative ways to stay connected on Mother’s Day
For those of us who won’t be able to spend time together in person, Mother’s Day can still take on a special significance. Moms online have shared their own unique approaches to celebrating Mother’s Day across distances, such as enjoying a solo relaxation day or setting up an activity with friends. Plus, modern technology allows families to connect virtually through video calls, sharing photos, or sending messages across social media platforms. Be sure to reach out to let your loved ones know you’re thinking of them.
Simple ways to show love
While self-care is vital, moms also rely greatly on the support of their loved ones. We may think our moms know how much we love them — it’s easy to leave the “Thank you’s” unspoken when it comes to the people who are constants in our lives. However, expressing gratitude in even the most minute way can have a rippling effect. Friends, family members, and partners can all play a role in helping moms feel valued as the superheroes they are. Here are some ideas for ways to show your mom how special she is:
Practical support: Jump in on household chores, childcare responsibilities, or meal preparation without being asked. This can give moms some much-needed time to relax and recharge. Some moms might not seek help directly, so taking a proactive approach shows that you’re happy to lend a hand in whatever way you can. If you don’t live with your mom or want to help another mom in your community, make this a priority the next time you visit.
Emotional Support: Moms are usually the ones offering comfort to us when we’re feeling down and cheering us on when we win. When you’re with your mom, try your best to be fully present in the conversation — ask her some engaging questions about how she’s doing and how she’s feeling. Being there to listen and offer words of encouragement or advice when needed can go a long way at any stage.
As we celebrate Mother’s Day this year, let’s take the time to honor and appreciate all mother figures in our lives, regardless of their biological relationship. By making self-care a priority and offering support to the moms around us, we can show them just how much they are loved and valued.
Allison Palmer brings a unique blend of expertise to her work as a Content Specialist. From her early days in clinical research, she has been driven by a passion for making a positive impact. Inspired by her interactions with patients, she aims to carry that spirit of advocacy into all of her professional and personal pursuits. A college workshop featuring a visiting author solidified her love for writing, leading her to blend her dedication to improving health outcomes with the craft of powerful storytelling. Allison hopes her readers not only learn from what she writes but also feel empowered to make sustainable changes in their lives. In her free time, she can be found immersed in a good book, exploring new travel destinations, or cooking her favorite recipes in the kitchen. Join her as she explores the intersection of wellness, innovation, and words.
We all have a finite number of hours in the day to work, cook and eat, sleep, socialize, exercise, pursue hobbies, do nothing and all of the other things that make life awesome. Nature abhors a vacuum and so we fill what time we have. As life remains full to the brim, I do everything I can to protect myself from the drains. These are the people, thoughts, activities, and tasks that make our days more exhausting than they need to be. I am talking about energy vampires and they can leave us feeling absolutely depleted at the end of the day. Imagine what they do over a week, a month and a lifetime?
The consequences of persistent exposure to energy vampires can be as damaging to our health as poor eating habits or lack of sleep and exercise. Managing the impact of energy vampires is challenging. We have to be smart and committed! This requires our own discipline, delicacy and diplomacy. I have definitely not mastered the subtle art of dodging the human energy vampires, but as an art, it’s always a work in progress. Here’s what I have for you that has helped me better handle them.
What Are Energy Vampires?
The Human Form of Energy Vampires
The most common type of energy vampires are the human form. These are people who tend toward the “me, me, me” train of thought, and find it difficult to see beyond their own point of view. The biggest challenge with the human energy vampire is that because they are so focussed on their needs and wants, they usually have absolutely no awareness as to the impact they are having. They don’t see the pile of exhausted humans that trail behind their interactions. With a simple conversation, a passive aggressive criticism, where before you had a skip in your step, you’re now feeling zapped of your physical, mental, emotional or spiritual energy (or a combination of these).
The human energy vampires could be friends, family members, co-workers or romantic partners.
Human energy vampires can suck the wind from your sails in many ways:
Overly dramatic: creating large problems or drama when there is in fact very little offence
Whiny: constantly complaining about everything that happens to them, or having a ‘why me?’ attitude
Negative: always seeing the bad things and never focusing on the good or practicing gratitude
Blaming: nothing is ever their fault and they are reluctant to take personal responsibility; they can often play the victim
Insecure: they feel sad, low or insecure about their lives and abilities, so they are constantly seeking affirmation from others
Jealous: feeling jealous or resentful of what you or other people have going on, so they may behave with spite or try to downplay your accomplishments
Dominant: always the centre of attention and very outgoing, but never stops to listen, pay attention or ask how anyone else is doing
Gossipy: focusing on other people’s behaviour and constantly talking about (or judging) others
Needy: relying on others too much, not developing resourcefulness or self-sufficiency
Prone to giving guilt trips: using emotional manipulation to make you feel guilty so they can get what they want
In general, energy vampires have trouble coping with their own lives so they feed off others to sustain themselves. Unfortunately, that is very draining and downright unpleasant for those around them.
Thought-Induced Energy Vampires
Thoughts in and of themselves can be our own worst energy vampire. We can manufacture our own stress around the future, around an activity, a work assignment, a relationship and let those thoughts spin beyond our grasp. I often refer to this form of vampirism as The Iron Filings. Think of being a kid in the 80s when you were allowed to play with magnets and loose iron filings in school. You’d drag the magnet along the floor and the iron filings would magnetize and stick to others. This is similar to what happens with our thoughts – one challenging thought begins to pick up speed and as it does, starts collecting a whole bunch of other stressful and draining thoughts along with it.
Our own stressful thoughts are one of the greatest drains on our energy, and producer of stress in our lives. Most often these thoughts pertain to things that happened in the past, or that might happen in the future, yet both are out of our control, are unchangeable (especially if they happened in the past), and have no bearing on reality and most likely not going to happen in the future. It’s basically a stress we create in our own mind that we allow to dominate our emotions and drain us of energy.
Our thoughts can turn any communication, task or activity into an energy drain simply by choosing to worry, dread, fret or delay (yes, procrastination is another very common thought-triggered energy vampire).
And some of us (I count myself here) are simply more sensitive to our surroundings and internal processes than others. This is where empathy comes in.
empaths and empathy
Energy vampires cannot feed off one another – they need someone who will bear the load of their problems and emotions. This could feasibly be anyone who is kind and compassionate, but often it is empaths that are especially susceptible to energy vampires. Have you ever heard of an intuitive empath. You know at least one. Me.
Empaths are highly sensitive and highly intuitive people who easily absorb other people’s emotions. Dr. Judith Orloff, a psychotherapist, has written extensively about empaths and how they can best survive in the world when it so easy for them to become overwhelmed with the problems of others. You can read more about the common traits of empaths here, which include being introverted and feeling replenished by nature, among many other qualities.
Empathy is an incredibly important quality to develop and practice. It allows us to understand how other people are feeling from their point of view, which in turn allows us to be warmhearted and understanding. Empathy has evolutionary roots and we are biologically designed this way (though some of us have a more innate ability than others, it can definitely be taught).
While we tend to think of human survival in terms of ‘survival of the fittest’, the truth is we can’t survive alone. Empathy allows us to create communities, feel connected to one another, find our community, have satisfying social lives and help each other survive and thrive. In a medical context, empathy from doctors, nurses and other medical professionals leads to greater patient satisfaction and better health outcomes. Studies of healthcare professionals show that staff who are burned out tend to have lower empathy. This makes sense – when you are depleted, you have less capacity to take on anything else.
Not all people who are empathetic are empaths, and this may allow them to set more distinct boundaries with energy vampires.
Intuitive empaths become prime targets and prime reactionaries to the internal vampires that are their own thoughts and external vampires that are energy-zapping humans. We are simply more sensitive and responsive to both our inner and outer environments.
Health Risks of Energy Vampires
Our brains and bodies are intricately connected, and we are designed to bond and socialize with other people. Social interaction can produce oxytocin, a hormone that can facilitate love, security and calm the nervous system. When we interact with energy vampires, the whole ordeal can cause us to release the stress hormone cortisol. This induces a stress cascade that may lead to:
First Work On Yourself
Sometimes what we experience in the world is actually a mirror of how we are. If you notice that everyone in your life is sucking the life out of you, take some time to take an honest look at yourself. Are you in any way an active participant in the patterns that are unfolding? This doesn’t excuse anyone else’s actions, but it may help you change or reduce how often this is happening.
The other thing to remember is the role our own thoughts play in how we experience the world around us. We have the power to turn an innocent comment into a major drama, simply by thinking of it that way. To combat these tendencies, it’s important to find ways to make our minds work in favour of a positive and stabilized mood, such as Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT), and allowing time to rest so we can be less reactive and have better responsiveness.
Yes, working on ourselves is key, but we also need to know how to arm against the energy vampires, too. I offer some guidance on how to work with them and, if needed, get away from them – because ultimately, we have the choice to decide how we respond to the world around us.
How to Deal with Energy Vampires in Life and At Work
In an ideal world, we’d “Marie Kondo” the heck out of those energy vampires and never have to deal with them (they certainly don’t spark joy!). Unfortunately, we can’t always avoid being in the presence of an energy vampire at work, at family gatherings or in social situations. And for those of us with active minds, even a passing, innocent comment can spark the internal thought-induced energy vampire. The magnet hits the iron filings and the cascade of spinning and draining begins. Thankfully, being around an energy vampire doesn’t have to suck the energy out of you.
A first step is realizing that we can’t change energy vampires (or anyone else, for that matter). We can only alter our own behaviours and attitudes. These tips can help you handle energy vampires and your own wellbeing at the same time.
The only thing we can ever control is how we respond to what’s happening in our minds and in our lives.
Reduce or Limit Contact with Energy Vampires
You may not be able to cut someone out of your life completely, but that doesn’t mean you have to see them or talk to them all the time. It is well within your right to turn down an invitation to a family dinner or after work drinks if you know an energy vampire will be there, or if the gathering is small enough that you can’t engage with other people. No need to create an elaborate excuse or lie – a simple, “I have plans” will suffice. If necessary, a full severing of ties may be needed.
Set Boundaries and Say No
If you are in a situation where you can’t avoid an energy vampire, set boundaries for both yourself and the vampire. For example, you may resolve to only stay for an hour and then make a polite exit, without being deterred by the energy vampire’s pleading. You can also set boundaries within the conversation you’re having with the other person by not encouraging their behaviour – that may mean shutting down the conversation or changing the topic. Dr. Orloff has some strategies that will help based on the type of energy vampire you are dealing with.
In some situations, you may be able to place a physical boundary by going to another room, shutting the door of your office or putting headphones on. If a physical barrier isn’t available, Dr. Orloff describes creating a mental/emotional shield for yourself that will help protect you.
Call the Energy Vampires on Their Behaviour
This option can be tricky and requires finesse, but sometimes you have to challenge energy vampires and confront their behaviours head on. They may learn empathy from this, or they might not, but at least it may redirect the interaction to a more positive light. For example, if someone is endlessly complaining you could tell them you will listen to one more complaint, and then they have to tell you five positive things about their day.
Encourage Resiliency
For the energy vampires who are needy and insecure, guiding them to resiliency or affirming a positive outcome can help. Instead of coming up with solutions or suggestions that will fix the problem for them (which may lead to them continually returning to you for solutions), say something like, “I’m confident you have the ability to figure this out” or “I know you are going to come up with the best solution that’s right for you/this situation”. In this way, you’re not directly addressing their insecurities with rote compliments but reminding them they have the skills and abilities to succeed.
Remind Yourself of Your Own Strength
Energy vampires seek you out because you are strong, competent and wonderful to be around. It’s this strength of character that will fortify you against them – an energy vampire can only drain you if you continue to let them. Remind yourself that you are strong – use a mantra if you find it helpful.
Practice Physical and Emotional Self-Care
Prioritize whatever you need to do to maintain your physical, emotional and spiritual health. That might be hobbies, baths, meditation, exercise, napping, or whatever you need to feel nourished and replenished, especially if an interaction with an energy vampire is depleting. I have a few detailed guides to self-care you can peruse for ideas:
Seek Out the Energy Boosters
Surround yourself with incredible people as much as you can – those who energize you, are supportive and empathetic, and have a true desire to help you succeed. The more time you spend in situations with an equitable energy exchange, the less you will feel depleted or taken advantage of.
Ask for Help
Call on partners, colleagues or friends to help you handle energy vampires: you don’t have to deal with them on your own. Some people are discerning and will naturally learn your cues quickly when you need them to step in and help, but in many cases it’s best to be upfront with what you need. Tell them to never leave you alone with Uncle So and So or devise other strategies to help you diffuse or handle energy vampire situations.
Children can also be energy vampires – though with the most innocent and pure of hearts, of course. While there are some gendered differences in how men and women develop and express empathy, the burden of empathy often falls to women through social conditioning. Ask for help with children, too, whether you are female or male, to keep yourself healthy and sane.
Keep It Professional at Work
Energy Vampires Further Reading and Resources
One more thing before I leave you on your way to ponder the vampires in your life. You could be one, too. Just something to consider. What is the energy you are putting out, and what is the energy you are taking? This is something to consider in your own interactions. We want to aim for the balance. With friends and family, optimally the balance is over a lifetime. Sometimes we give and sometimes we take. Giving, however, doesn’t need to be a drain. It’s ultimately up to each of us to determine the boundaries, and set our own limits.
On My Mind Episode 12: How to Handle Energy Vampires
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A new study finds that a “Science of Happiness” university course, designed to teach students a variety of happiness hacks, provides the most long-term benefits when participants stick with the tools and exercises after completion.
There have been many experiments showing the short-term benefits of positive psychological interventions like gratitude, meditation, kindness, and journaling, but not many studies have looked into these effects on a longer timeline.
At the University of Bristol, there’s a popular course known as “The Science of Happiness” that aims to teach students how to use various happiness hacks to improve their mental health and well-being. This course has been running since 2019 and has been offered both online and in-person.
The program balances practical advice with important information on topics such as: the nature of happiness, the role of biology and environment, cognitive biases, brain mechanisms, problem-solving, and the importance of social connection. At the end of each week, students are instructed to try evidence-based activities or “happiness hacks,” as a way of fostering positive mental well-being.
In previous years, individuals who took the course reported significantly increased mental well-being from the first week to the final week, as shown by a 10-15% increase in their scores on the Short Warwick-Edinburgh Mental Well-Being Scale. Participants also reported reduced loneliness and anxiety. A follow-up after six weeks continued to show sustained benefits, but it was unclear how long these positive effects lasted.
In a new study published in the journal Higher Education, researchers analyzed 228 undergraduate students from various disciplines who had completed the positive psychology course either 1 or 2 years ago. Interestingly, while most students reported short-term benefits, later group analysis revealed that these benefits did not persist uniformly across all participants during the long term follow-up period.
A deeper look at the data revealed a crucial factor behind the program’s success: continued engagement. Approximately 51% of the students who actively practiced the recommended activities taught during the course maintained their increased mental well-being over the follow-up period. These students consistently applied positive psychology principles in their daily lives at least a year after they completed the class.
Here’s a chart from the study illustrating the findings:
As you can see, those who continued to follow the “happiness hacks” maintained their gains in subjective well-being during the long term follow-up.
The most commonly reported technique that students continued to use was gratitude (37.17%), including writing letters of gratitude to others and making lists of things that they were grateful for (“three good things”). Other commonly reported techniques were mindfulness/meditation (33.63%), exercise (21.24%), journaling (17.70%) and kindness (10.62%).
How to Create Sustained Positive Change
The study recommends that schools and institutions consider the long-term impact of psychoeducational courses. While initial benefits are essential, sustained effects depend on prolonged engagement and commitment.
Course designs should incorporate mechanisms to encourage continued practice:
The goal of psychology – whether it’s with a course, book, article, therapist, or coach – is always to take what you learn and integrate it into your real world living.
In the moment, learning about these tools and exercises can provide a nice temporary boost of relief, but then we quickly get bored, forget about them, stop applying them, and lose out on their benefits over time.
Much like a diet or exercise regimen, you need to create a mental health system in your life that works for you and is sustainable into the future. Quick fixes are a myth. You’ll always snap back to your old ways if you don’t choose a course of action you can follow continuously and indefinitely.
In theory, choose habits you can do for the rest of your life. That’s the mindset you need for continuous growth, happiness, and well-being. Gratitude, kindness, meditation, exercise, and journaling can become habits that are just as second-nature to you as tying your shoes or driving a car. Make self-care an everyday occurence.
Ultimately, if you want to build a happy life, you have to be in it for the long haul.
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Are you looking for the best gift for a loved one who has been burning the candle at both ends lately?
In this article, we’re sharing with you our recommendations for the best self-care gifts you can give to the people you love. These gift ideas also serve as reminders for the recipient to take a break and indulge in a little “me” time in order to rejuvenate.
There are gifts that focus on beauty, relaxation, mindfulness, wellness, and time management. Check them out!
21 Best Self-Care Gifts for Relaxation and Wellness
Help your loved one feel relaxed after a busy day with an oil diffuser that spreads fragrant aromas throughout the house. This Stone Diffuser from Vitruvi has an elegant design that is both subtle and eye-catching.
It is crafted from porcelain, and will run for 3 hours uninterrupted or 7.5 hours intermittently. For safety, this diffuser automatically turns off when the water runs out or when the diffusing time is up.
Gift your loved ones this Self-Care Digital Planner Icon Stickers set featuring cute images about self0-care. They can be used in digital bullet journals, planners, and notebooks. The eye-catching designs include phrases such as “go on a walk,” “reward yourself,” and “family time.” They serve as reminders to set aside time for self-care.
These stickers are pre-cropped and designed for use with the GoodNotes app.
It could be that someone you love is busy with school or their career, and you worry about their well-being. You can remind your loved one to focus on themselves with the Heart Habits Self-Care Gift Box.
The box contains items designed to help people get in touch with their true selves and set aside time to pamper themselves.
There are items containing uplifting words, fun challenges for self-care, and wonderful treats for soothing stressed-out bodies and minds.
Give the one you love the gift of deep relaxation with the Lavender Eye Pillow infused with lavender fragrance. This pillow is filled with flax seeds, which provide a light and gentle acupressure massage around the wearer’s eyes, taking away the tensions of the day.
This pillow is especially beneficial for those suffering from migraines. It can be placed in the microwave or the freezer for warming or cooling effect, depending on the wearer’s needs.
Bath salts are awesome gifts because they help reduce pain and inflammation. Dead Sea Mineral Bath Salt offers therapeutic benefits for the skin. The product dissolves easily in warm water, and is just what one needs for a truly relaxing bath after a long day.
Your loved one will enjoy three bath salt variants:
Unscented – promotes healing for skin conditions such as psoriasis and eczema
Lavender – relieves itchiness and promotes peaceful sleep
Eucalyptus – takes away toxins from the body and soothes aching muscles
This can also be used as a body scrub for extra pampering.
Sleep & Stress Care Package takes away stress and promotes deep sleep. It is the ideal gift box for those who need a way to keep stress at bay, improve their moods, and achieve a peaceful sleep.
The care package consists of the following items:
Dream balm – infused with lavender, chamomile, and other essential oils that promote better sleep
Sweet dreams tea – an herbal tea that also promotes better sleep
Pillow sachet – contains lavender and lavender essential oil, which have properties known to aid in deep sleep
Calming tincture – an herbal formula that relieves anxiety and tension
Weighted blankets are known to give a calming effect, easing tension and anxiety. The feeling of a weighted blanket is like a warm, firm hug. If you can’t be there in person to give your loved one a hug, the Temperature Balancing Weighted Blanket will do the job for you.
Choose a blanket that has a temperature-balancing feature to provide extra warmth and comfort. Tranquility’s weighted blanket also comes with a washable cover to keep it sanitary.
The Hidrate Spark 3 glows to tell you that it’s time to drink water. It fits in most backpack pockets, cup holders, and bicycle bottle cages. You’ll never have to worry if your loved one is sufficiently hydrated if they have this water bottle with them.
This Salt Lamp is made from salt crystals from the mountains of Himalaya. When used, it produces a calming effect through its amber colored light. In addition, it purifies the air by releasing negative ions. This, in turn, improves mood and relieves stress.
The Neva Salt Lamp comes with a dimmer, so the light can be adjusted according to preference.
A zafu provides firm support while doing sitting practices in yoga. It gives the person’s hips extra height, helping maintain their natural curve, and provides comfort—especially during extended periods of meditation.
Give your loved one this Yoga Meditation Buckwheat Bolster Pillow Cushion for a more peaceful experience during meditation. It comes filled with buckwheat hulls to provide a balance of pliability and firmness. There are six colors to choose from, as well as a flower mandala design.
Pamper the book lover in your family with this Book Lover’s Soy Candle (Old Books Scent). It smells like old books—the sweet, comforting aroma found in well-kept bookshops. It entices the user to curl up with a favorite book and spend the whole day just reading beloved stories.
There are a couple of benefits to soy candles. For starters, they are naturally sourced and renewable. They also last longer than paraffin candles, and are friendlier for the environment.
These Positive Affirmations Engraved Wooden Tokens are wonderful reminders for taking time for self-care. They can be given on any occasion. The tokens are handmade from cherry wood and are engraved with different affirming, inspiring, and empowering phrases such as “I believe in me,” “I am loved,” and “I am a survivor.”
These wooden self-care tokens come in a jute bag so they can be brought anywhere and drawn anytime someone needs a boost of affirmation.
A pillow spray can help prevent sleep anxiety and promote a deep, relaxing slumber. This Deep Sleep Pillow Spray from Thisworks is proven to help people fall asleep quicker and wake up feeling more energized.
The sleep spray is formulated with natural essential oils, and has no harmful chemicals. It is even safe for use by pregnant women.
If your loved one is constantly juggling tasks, then this Undated Planner will be of great benefit to them for developing an effective time management habit. It will help them really zero in on their goals.
The planner has space for a mind map and vision board to help bring success for the year. It also comes with stickers for creating interesting reminders within the planner’s pages.
These Mindfulness Cards help inspire mindfulness, creating balance and re-centering the reader despite their hectic schedule. Each card contains an inspiring message, such as:
“Reflect joy.”
“Make space for silence.”
“Look for the lovely.”
On the reverse side of each card is a simple exercise to promote mindfulness.
There are several cultures around the world that use labyrinths for meditation, prayer, and relaxation. It is also used for healing restoring well-being. Moreover, in ancient times, a labyrinth was viewed as a symbol of our journey through life.
Give your loved one this Wooden Finger Labyrinth to help them relax and arrive at a state of meditation. It comes with a sawtooth attachment that can be used to hang the labyrinth on the wall.
Hygge is a feeling of contentment and deep comfort. To give this gift of comfort and coziness to your loved one, you might want to subscribe to this Deluxe Hygge Box Subscription so they can regularly receive a Hygge box.
You can choose a monthly, quarterly, bi-annual, or annual box subscription. Your loved one will receive Hygge boxes that contain curated products that promote self-care and evoke the Hygge lifestyle.
Some examples of items in the boxes include:
Specialty hot drinks
Eatable treats (chocolates or biscuits)
Items that promote wellness
Items with an element of light (candles, fairy lights)
A Classic Bathrobe is a must-have item for relaxation, so we have added it to our list as an ideal gift for self-care.
This classic plush robe is designed for ultimate comfort. It has a couple of slouchy pockets, and its shawl collar adds a cozy feel as one lounges in it after a long day at work or school.
If the person you love enjoys the written word, give them the gift of The Essential Rumi with the works of the great Sufi mystic Rumi. His words transcend time to touch the hearts of those who read his poems. Rumi’s writings encourage moments of contemplation and inspire delight.
Final Thoughts About the Best Self-Care Gifts
When the people you love are working hard and stressed out, you probably feel worried about their health and well-being. A thoughtful gift to inspire any type of self-care can be a way of saying that you care.
We hope that you’ve found an item that’s perfect for your loved one among the gifts featured today.You might also want to include a message of encouragement when you give your gift. This post features self-care quotes that can help remind the recipient to take better care of themselves.
And if you want more resources about self care , be sure to check out these blog posts:
There might be affiliate links on this page, which means we get a small commission of anything you buy. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. Please do your own research before making any online purchase.
So often, when people talk about wanting to take better care of themselves, they are referring to their physical appearance.
What typically gets forgotten, however, is the importance of one’s emotional well being.
Emotional self care is just as important as the other types of self care. In fact, they typically go hand-in-hand… because if you’re happy with yourself and where you are in life, you’ll be less likely to sabotage your body with laziness, harmful substances and overindulgence.
Emotional self care is a process in which we bring an awareness to our emotions and take the steps necessary in order to respect and nurture these emotions. The process is essential for our wellbeing… but also easier said than done.
Think about it.
When is the last time you put yourself first?
If you are a spouse, parent, employee trying to climb the corporate ladder… you are more than likely putting other people’s needs and desires before your own.
Boss asking you to work late? Sure.
Your husband going on a business trip? Then you’re in charge of the kids for a few days… which means the chance of you making it to that hot yoga class is highly unlikely.
Sick kid? Guess you’re skipping book club tonight.
While it’s important to be there for others, or to make your mark on the world, it is equally important to be in a healthy headspace so that you can actually be your best self.
After all, your best self is the one that other people are counting on.
In this article, I’m going to offer 7 emotional self-care practices to help put you in the best mindset possible… because once you’re there, the sky’s the limit as to how good you can feel and what you can accomplish!
Emotional Self Care Practice #1: Do Something That Makes You Happy
It may sound basic and cliché, but this little gem of a tip is so true.
Emotional self care is all about taking care of your inner self and doing things that improve your mood… ultimately reducing anxiety.
And what better way is there to do that than to find your happy place? That one thing, person, or place that makes you smile from the inside out.
Maybe it’s as simple as enjoying coffee or drinks out with a friend. Or taking a bubble bath by candlelight once the kids are asleep.
Maybe it’s less glamorous sounding than an island getaway, but it can still have a profound effect on your emotional self care routine.
Deep breathing can lift your mood and quiet the mind.
Additionally, research has shown undeniable effects of deep breathing on the heart, brain, digestion and immune system.
When coupled with the rejuvenating, mentally grounding and physical effects of yoga… this practice is a surefire way to keep your emotional self care in check.
If you don’t currently consider yourself a yogi… don’t worry. It’s never too late to learn. Online courses are a great way to get the kinks out before taking your workout public.
Emotional Self Care Practice #3: Clean House on Your Social Media Pages
Whether you realize it or not, social media can have a substantial impact on your emotional self care.
So it’s your job to ensure that who you are following and what you are posting is positive.
If a Facebook friend is always spewing negatives or trying to start arguments, it may be time to block them. As harsh as that may sound, it is a detriment to your emotional well being to surround yourself around anyone who can’t be generally optimistic and uplifting.
The same rule applies for what you choose to share with the masses.
Make sure your posts are indicative of the good things going on in your life. Even if you’re not in the best of moods one day, it is good practice to force yourself to look at the bright side.
When you choose to see the glass as half full, you will soon realize that there is always light to be found… even in darkness.
It’s also a good idea to follow people and pages who are motivational. Daily affirmations and inspiring quotes can be a great way to start, or even end, the day when it comes to giving your emotional self care a boost.
Emotional Self Care Practice #4: Color With (Or Without) Your Kids
When we were kids, teachers encouraged us to color… not just because it was fun, but because it helped us to hone in on those fine motor skills.
Truth be told, coloring can be so much more than these things. There are at least a handful of benefits to coloring in between the lines, such as:
Stress relief
Mental sharpness
Creative mediation
Concentration
Mental stamina
Coloring forces you to slow down and stop thinking… even if for just a little while.
Additionally, specific colors affect our mood. So the colors we choose to color with may be trying to tell our brain something.
Whether or not we are attune to it, color makes us feel a certain way. And since a picture is worth a thousand words, the palette we elect to decorate it with can indicate subconscious feelings.
By bringing those colors to light, we can better understand what we need to fulfill our emotional self care.
Emotional Self Care Practice #5: Try Mindfulness Exercises
What is mindfulness?
Mindfulness is the practice of purposefully focusing all of your attention on the current moment, and accepting it without judgment.
This is a great place to start if you are looking for a key element on your journey towards emotional self care.
Practicing mindfulness forces you to slow down and take the time you need to check in with yourself. But the real beauty of this technique is that it can be incorporated into almost everything you do as part of your daily routine.
Things like bathing and eating breakfast can coexist with mindfulness.
When you are mindful of your emotional and physical needs, you are better able to prioritize what really matters to you. This will help you to set short and long term goals to ensure your overall well being.
The video below talks about 7 morning routine ideas that can help you become more mindful on a daily basis.
Emotional Self Care Practice #6: Set New Goals Each Week
A goal can be as simple as setting aside one, uninterrupted hour for yourself each week. During this hour, you can choose from any of the emotional self care practices we’ve discussed here and execute it.
Take a yoga class or hit the gym.
Catch up on a tv show.
Mediate.
Pour a glass of wine and read a book by the fire.
Your goal can also be more complex, such as working out 4 days this week… or cleaning out the linen closet.
It’s also ok to set multiple goals that vary by time commitment and also importance.
For instance, maybe you are determined to finish painting your spare bedroom this week… but also want to have lunch with your sister. Both are doable, you just need to keep your eye on the prize and not lose sight of the big picture.
If the spare room gets painted, you’ll have that relaxing home office or sanctuary you’ve been craving. And if you meet up with your sister, she may have some fresh decorating ideas for you. She might even go shopping with you.
By setting goals and meeting them, you will give yourself an overwhelming sense of achievement and pride… and that goes hand in hand with an elevation in mood.
Can you say, “win/win”?
Emotional Self Care Practice #7: Refrain from Being Overly Critical of Yourself and Embrace Your True Self
At some point in your life, you may have been told not to be so hard on yourself.
And while that can be comforting to hear, it’s also extremely difficult to do.
It is human nature to blame or second guess yourself when things don’t go as planned. It is also natural to be displeased with yourself now and again… whether it’s because of the way you look, act or feel.
Now hear this! Nobody is perfect.
But that does not mean we should stop striving for perfection. Perfection in the sense that we want to be our very best self… physically and emotionally.
If you take the time to see yourself, really see yourself, then you will eventually become comfortable with who you are.
With a little emotional self care, you’ll become aware of your mental and physical limitations. You’ll settle into a nice rhythm with yourself and accept that you simply cannot control everything.
You can always work harder, but there will still be times when you’ll be forced to say, “This is who I am. I am doing my best.”.
If you accept the things you cannot change, you’ll free up your mind to work on those things that you can.
Embrace your best self and watch it soar!
Final Thoughts on Emotional Self Care
Emotional self care is about prioritizing your emotions.
It is such an important part of living our best life… yet so many of us fail to master it.
Why? Because we are so busy putting off the things that truly matter for the things that appear to matter.
A good job. A place to live. A spouse or family.
These are things that everybody wants… but there’s a catch.
Dreams are only as strong as the person behind them.
If you are optimistic, happy, outgoing, confident, kind and well-adjusted… if you believe that anything is possible and take care of yourself emotionally, it will happen.
Everything you want can be yours if your mind is open to receiving it.
And if you’re looking for more self-care ideas, be sure to check out these blog posts:
Nicole Krause has been writing both personally and professionally for over 20 years. She holds a dual B.A. in English and Film Studies. Her work has appeared in some of the country’s top publications, major news outlets, online publications, and blogs. As a happily married (and extremely busy) mother of four… her articles primarily focus on parenting, marriage, family, finance, organization, and product reviews.
There might be affiliate links on this page, which means we get a small commission of anything you buy. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. Please do your own research before making any online purchase.
Self-care is popular these days. It has become a buzz topic for many millennials.
But don’t let that fact make you think that self-care is synonymous with some sort of self-indulgence, or that is it is another example of the laziness of youth, or even aspirations for some unachievable state of bliss and nirvana
Self-care is not indulgent. Self-care is real, and it matters—more than you might think.
What Is Self-Care?
Self-care is the mindset, activities, practices and habits we bring to bear against stress, unhappiness, illness, depression and many more negative emotions.
Self-care is about giving ourselves relief when we feel overwhelmed. It is about addressing our problems holistically. Self-care activities are usually carried out, or at least initiated by, the person themselves. To care for yourself, you need to know you needs and seek them out.
While it is easy to say that self-care is some new indulgent fad, this is simply not true. People have been talking about the needs for self-care—and the mind-body-spirit relationship that self-care helps foster—for many years.
In fact, the first mention of self-care goes back as far as the Egyptians, where they discussed self-care ideas like using specific oils to improve moods and fight ailments (similar to our modern day essential oil benefits.)
How Practicing Self-Care Can Change Your life
The first thing to remember about self-care is that it is not indulgent.
As with a plane that has lost pressure, the right thing to do in life is to always help you first. Then, when you have your gas mask in place, you can assist others.
The reason for this is simple. Until you are helped, you are likely to cause more problems and become part of the overall problem rather than being part of the solution.
Self-care is all about taking care of the little things that matter to help heal you so that you can become part of the solution.
Self-Care Ideas
There is no single viewpoint on the best self-care ideas, because not everyone gives the same importance to all self-care activities.
For example, my wife views getting a pedicure as one of the most relaxing and at the same time invigorating experiences in her life. Getting a pedicure restores balance for her, and gives her energy to face many challenges.
But when I get a pedicure, it actually builds tension in my body and mind. I don’t like people playing around with my feet, and the process annoys me.
So for my wife a pedicure is one of the best self-care ideas in the world, but personally I would never put that on any list of self-care activities.
This, of course, adds to the complexity of self-care. There is no cookie-cutter formula for caring for you. Just because one form of self-care works for me doesn’t mean it will help others.
That is the reason I tried to make this self-care idea list as detailed as possible, filled with lots of self-care activities. I wanted to include as many options as possible for people to choose from.
That way, people are free to ignore the ideas that don’t excite them and focus on the self-care ideas that actually make a difference in their holistic well-being.
273 Self-Care Ideas for Coping With Life
With a list of 200+ self-care ideas, it may not seem easy to hunt down the 30-40 that might really apply to you and make a significant impact on your overall mind-body-spirit well-being.
To make things easier, I have divided these 200+ self-care ideas into seven categories:
Emotional
Mental
Physical
Pleasure
Sensory
Social
Spiritual
The idea is that if you know the type of self-care support you are looking for, it is easier to browse through the self-care ideas in that section alone.
Without further ado, let’s take a look at some of the best self-care ideas and activities.
54 Mental Self-Care Ideas and Activities
I feel that mental self-care is one of the most important of the seven sections. At times, your mind may need rest and recuperation, while at other times you may be looking for stimulation and challenges.
Take another route to work, or do a routine differently. Develop new neural pathways and keep your brain healthy by mixing up your routine in small ways.
Sew, quilt, or crochet something. Engage your hands.
Try something new in your living space. Rearrange all of your furniture in a way that makes you more comfortable. When your home “looks” new, you receive constant new stimulus until your mind is completely settled with the new look.
Establish and stick to a routine. Your personal routine can be grounding in times when life seems chaotic.
Use online tutorials to learn something new (i.e., Photoshop or Excel).
Discover your stress indicators, such as mood swings, shortening temper, or feeling drained, overwhelmed, or angry. Use these “warning signs” to let you know you need “me time” and some self-care.
Listen to a podcast about a topic that interests you, but you have yet to explore.
Declutter your wardrobe. Every month, pick three clothes that you don’t love (or love least) and give them away.
Do something spontaneous.
If you are going through something, be it an illness or major life change, educate yourself by learning about what you’re facing, what to expect, and where you can get support.
Clean up just one small corner of a room in your house. Tidying up can help calm our minds.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, create a plan by listing out your three most important tasks and tackling them first. (See what qualifies as important according to the Eisenhower Matrix.)
Unplug from email and social media for an hour.
Read a magazine.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed with too much social interaction, go home. Don’t be afraid to cancel plans or say “no.”
Self-care is about a lot more than just mindset. While self-care can be a big help for your mental health days, it is often an even bigger response to your in-the-moment emotional needs.
Giving your emotions free rein—or at least acknowledging your emotional state and moving on—is an important part of self-care. Before you can get better, you must acknowledge what is and was, and make those changes
Our emotions often dictate the way we behave, so we need to be mindful of what we’re feeling, especially in stressful situations. It’s not helpful to label emotions as “good” or “bad.”
It’s better to give each emotion a descriptive term showing exactly what it is (e.g., anger, fear of rejection, sadness, etc.). When we assign negative emotions specific labels, we rob them of some of their power to terrify us.
Allow yourself to feel and express all of your feelings (in a safe and appropriate environment). For example, if you are angry, go into a private closet and scream, rather than taking it out on your secretary.
Ask three good friends to give your positive feedback. What do they love about you?
Dedicate a week to saying only positive things on your favorite social media channel.
Learn 4-8-7 breathing.
Do one thing today just because it makes you happy.
Finish this sentence every day after you wake up: “I love myself because I ___________.”
Keep a running list of great things people say about you. Read it when you feel down.
Try some adult coloring as a form of anxiety and/or stress release. This can also serve to help you focus, be more mindful and perhaps spark some creativity.
Look at yourself in the mirror and imagine that you’re your best friend. What would you tell you right now?
Define only three daily goals. This makes goals achievable, while also allowing for normal “emergencies” at work that might take up your time.
Better yet, learn to create SMART goals. Watch the video below for a quick overview of SMART goals and the three examples for each of the seven areas of your life — for a total of 21 examples.
Need help coming up with new ideas? Create an inspirational collage and hang it in your workspace.
Read some feel-good poetry.
Remind yourself of the good stuff in life by writing a list of things you’re grateful to have. Then post it somewhere you can see it often to help refocus your emotions when you feel down.
Revisit happier times by reading old emails, letters, or postcards from friends and family.
Give. Do it unconditionally, and with no strings attached. See how good it feels to help others without expecting reciprocation.
Set photos of your loved ones as the wallpaper of your phone or laptop so you can look at them when you need inspiration.
Take a moment to name your emotions without judging them.
Stop being your harshest critic. Allow yourself to make mistakes. No one is perfect. Realize this means you too!
Tell your pet all of your darkest secrets. Your pet’s nonchalance will remind you that you’re going to be okay.
Unfollow or mute toxic “friends” in your social media feeds.
Tap into your creative side. Use painting or another creative art to release your fear, anxiety, anger, and frustration on paper.
Use 15 minutes to write out your thoughts about anything bothering you. Then burn or throw away the paper.
Remove any equipment or appliances that make you feel bad about yourself, such as the bathroom scale.
Clean up your work area. (Many people find a clean and neat work area to be cathartic.)
Write encouraging affirmations or inspirational quotes on Post-its and place them where you will see them every day.
29 Physical Self-Care Ideas and Activities
In the first two sections of this massive self-care ideas list, we concentrated on the mind—first dealing with self-care for mental fatigue, and next sharing some self-care activities for handing emotional distress.
Of course, the mind is not the only thing that needs care. Remember that there is a mind-body-spirit connection. Each one of these aspects links to the others, creating a web where negative emotions can display as physical ailments and physical ailments may cause psychic pain.
The best self-care for the body is always going to revolve around two essential facts.
Your body is your temple. If you put good stuff in, you get more good stuff out (and vice versa).
You body wants to be active. It wants to be healthy. The more activity you can give it, the better your physical abilities will be. Engaging your body can even help you break away from unhelpful mental chatter.
These following self-care activities are designed to help you stay fit and healthy. They provide the energy to get things done and fulfill personal and professional commitments.
These ideas are not JUST about the exercise they give you, but also the mental training and energy they provide throughout rough days.
Commit to attending a free martial arts class.
Get up out of your chair and dance to your favorite upbeat song.
Know and use your self-soothing activities, like stroking your arm or leg, petting a dog, or sipping hot tea.
Know your body intimately. Use a mirror and get to know your naked self. Remember: no judgment.
Play some basketball (even if you don’t know how).
Scream, pound pillows, tear up paper, or shake your body to move the energy out.
Sleep in. Life can be hectic. Sometimes you need to just dump your schedule and go ahead and rest.
Slow dance for 30 minutes.
Roll it out. The benefits of foam rollers on the body are big. They stretch your muscles and give myofascial release to your body, which allows contracted muscles to relax, improving blood and nutrient flow to the area. This speeds healing and muscle regrowth, and just makes you feel awesome.
Take a long shower, dry your hair, and put on clothes that make you feel good.
54 Pleasurable and Pampering Self-Care Ideas and Activities
Now we get to the fun stuff—things you can (and need) to do just for you. This pampering and self-care is important to us for the times when we are overworked, deprived, and stressed.
Life is a balancing act. It is often bad to live a self-indulgent life where we constantly get to do whatever we want. This often leads to addictions, issues with limits, and a lack of happiness because people do not feel they have earned their right to this self-indulgence.
But when you are doing these activities as part of a self-care routine, they can be essential. We all need the joy of just sitting back and enjoying life and the things we love from time to time.
Remember: Pampering yourself by engaging in pleasurable activities can help reduce stress and increase the body’s production of “feel-good” hormones.
Relaxing activities also help lower blood pressure, reduce muscle tension and pain, and improve concentration and mood.
Let’s get to it, and check out some favorite indulgent and enjoyable methods of mental and physical self-care.
Go on a two-day holiday for the weekend.
Allow yourself to fantasize and daydream.
Attend a local high school sporting event.
Bake something just for fun.
Book a night in a fancy hotel. Take a bubble bath. Get room service. Relax.
Wrap yourself up in a cozy blanket and sip a cup of hot tea while reading a book.
18 Sensory Self-Care Ideas and Activities
Sights, sounds, tastes, smells, touch: For those of us who are HSP, these can be big distractions, and even cause our self-care to derail.
Sensory self-care for highly sensitive people may actually look like a list of “avoids”:
Avoid bright sunlight
Avoid crowds
Avoid loud noises
But even those without HSP tendencies may be either soothed or enraged depending on sensory input.
Sensory self-care activities help you focus on the present moment. Focusing on sensations of sight, smell, taste, touch, and sound gives you a break from worrying.
Self-care can sometimes be a bit of a misnomer. Self-care also includes the work you do in making sure that relationships with others you care about remain healthy.
No man (or woman) is an island. We need other people in our lives. Even the most introverted person does not “hate” being around other people. They simply want their relationships to be on an even ground.
Social self-care is about maintaining healthy, supportive relationships, and authentically connecting with others. Engaging in social self-care activities also help ensure that you have diverse relationships, not just with family, friends, and co-workers.
This is not only good for the social butterfly. In fact, these self-care steps are more useful to the introvert. The social butterfly finds social interactions second nature, and needs to expend little (or no) energy on figuring out these relationships. But the introvert has to keep these things in mind.
Accompany a friend or family member while they run errands or attend events.
Ask for help. Let people know you need some help.
Ask friends and family to remind you that things will be OK, and that what you’re feeling is temporary.
Call a friend or family member you care about, just to say hi.
Choose who you spend your time with today. Spend time with people who are enthusiastic and positive.
Converse positively with someone in customer service.
Cuddle someone or something. Don’t be afraid to ask for it!
Dress your pet in a silly costume and show them around to make others smile.
Go out in public and be around other people. Engaging is optional.
Tell someone near you what you appreciate or like about them.
Have a picnic with family or friends.
Host a family movie night over the weekend.
Intentionally reconnect with someone you’ve lost touch with or have unresolved conflict with.
Join a support group for people who are going through what you’re going through.
Join and attend a support group meeting. Share and listen.
Leave a funny voicemail for someone you care about.
Make cookies or brownies and give them away to a neighbor, family member, friend, or even strangers.
Post some dorky #ThrowbackThursday pictures of you from childhood and ask friends to do the same.
Schedule a regular date night with your significant other.
Seek out models of inspiration and read their stories.
Send a surprise care package to someone you love.
Send a letter or a postcard to someone far away.
Share a kind smile with strangers on your way to and from work.
Sit down and start a genuine conversation with a trusted friend or family member about things that are going well, things you’re having a hard time with, or things you are grateful for.
Not all self-care activities are physical and mental. Many self-care activities fall into a category we know as spiritual, religious, or internal thinking.
Spiritual self-care revolves around your values, and not just your religion.
These activities focus on helping you foster a calm mind and a sense of perspective beyond your day-to-day grind.
Do a 10-minute body scan technique to check in with each part of your body.
Do several one-minute body awareness meditations throughout the day.
Do several one-minute breathing meditations throughout the day.
Do several one-minute thought awareness meditations throughout the day to check in with your feelings and emotions.
Do something nice for someone in secret.
Donate money to a charity of your choosing. You can use a site like Charity Navigator that ranks charities according to how much money actually goes to the people you’re trying to help.
Help someone in some way. Open a door, carry a bag, or feed someone’s parking meter.
Intentionally find five unexpected beautiful things on your way to work.
Pay mindful attention to the things you do during your morning and evening routine.
Practice relaxation techniques.
Pray.
Read some spiritual literature.
Share with someone less fortunate, be it some extra lunch or clothes you no longer want.
Memorize passages from the Bible (or any spiritual or religious text).
Sit somewhere green and be still and quiet for a few minutes.
Soften your expectations of you and others.
Take a break from social media by deleting or deactivating it.
“Turn the other cheek” and be the better person when you disagree with someone.
Empathize. Try to understand why others think, feel, and react differently. Put yourself in their shoes and see how you would feel about their actions.
Volunteer at a local shelter, hospital, or nursing home. Be of service to others.
What are you good at? Find an opportunity to use that strength today.
Final Thoughts on Self Care Ideas
Remember, self-care isn’t just a luxury; it’s a necessity for your well-being. In the hustle of everyday life, taking a moment to prioritize yourself is not selfish; it’s a vital act of self-love.
So, whether you’re drawn to the simplicity of a cozy book nook, the invigorating power of a morning stretch, or the tranquility of a mindful breathing session, know that your self-care journey is uniquely yours. Embrace it with open arms, savoring each moment that contributes to your holistic well-being.
Hopefully, these self-care ideas can be your guide to creating a life filled with balance, joy, and a deep connection with yourself.
And if you’re looking for resources to make self-care an easy and natural part of your routine, be sure to check out these printables:
This posting, which concerns a recent study out of UC Berkeley on the relationship between sleep and relationship conflict, notes the importance of cultivating good habits in self-care. It’s one of the most critical tools in maintaining healthy relationships. Here are a few of Dr. John Gottman’s tips for goal-setting and stress management. The following will help you as you work to find balance and create a healthier lifestyle, both for yourself and for your relationship.
Tips for goal setting
Make your goals specific and measurable. Rather than telling your partner that you would like to talk more, suggest a concrete activity that you can do together whether it’s going for a walk after dinner every time or playing board games every Sunday afternoon.
Think about the pros and cons of making healthy changes. If we stick with the examples above, you could imagine that a pro would be the ability to feel closer to each other and relax, and a con could be the planning around any care-taking responsibilities.
Break big goals into little ones. If you want to get in shape, don’t overdo it. This will only add to your stress. You don’t want to strain yourself or cause an injury. Go slow. Start with smaller increments.
Ask for support. If you want to take care of yourself, remember the people closest to you—the ones you can count on. Call them or set up a video chat if you want a boost of encouragement.
Anticipate obstacles and have a backup plan. If you realize that your new self-care plan might be as fleeting as a New Year’s Resolution, don’t feel defeated. You are in control. Imagine the difficulties you may face in accomplishing your goal. For example, if going on a run every morning is going to be unrealistic, try to come up with a solution that you feel confident will work. Perhaps start every Saturday morning and work your way up.
Make a daily plan and track your progress. Ask yourself the following questions frequently: What are my intentions today? (“I’ll go on a run tonight” or “No more TV for a little while”)
Reward yourself for short-term and long-term successes. Set up a way to congratulate yourself when you achieve your big and small goals.
Goal setting as a couple
You can set those goals together and enjoy stress-free activities as a couple. Here are a few more ideas for relaxing together. You likely know what you and your partner enjoy most so try some of these or make up your own. You may learn more about each other in the process, strengthening your bond.
Watch your favorite show together.
Go on a jaunt through the neighborhood.
Explore a beautiful park and watch a sunset.
Find a take-out ice-cream stand or food truck where you can enjoy something delicious out in the open air.
These are ideas that can keep you and your relationship from being overwhelmed in daily life.
Opinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.
Does this sound familiar? You’re on the edge of burnout. You haven’t done anything “nice” for yourself in a while and you’re constantly putting other people’s needs above your own. The needs of your company, the needs of your family and the needs of your community are always a higher priority, and now there’s no more energy or room for you.
As a diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) consultant with a background in organizational psychology, I understand why some people constantly put themselves behind others and, consequently, burn themselves out. Marginalized people often do that. They code-switch to fit in with the dominant culture as a means of survival. Their needs are always last in the hierarchy.
It turns out, that up to 89% of Americans have experienced symptoms of burnout. That has to change. You can’t show up as your best — at work or with others — if you don’t take care of yourself first. I’m inviting you to take a step back from burnout and embrace radical self-care. Here’s how.
Radical self-care is a continual process that involves the conscious and proactive decision to care for yourself by engaging in activities that regularly feed your wellbeing. Radical self-care allows you to prioritize yourself and put self-supporting needs before others’ needs to reduce the impact of stress, burnout and emotional disarray. Self-care isn’t just a “phrase;” it involves intentional actions that allow you to be more cognizant and aware of your physical, mental, emotional, spiritual and relational health.
Why radical self-care matters for professionals
You’re running a company or you’re an employee with lots of responsibility and stress. People depend on you to lead and contribute. But if you’re burned out and exhausted, how can you be your best self? How can you show up when it matters most?
Before burnout and ball-dropping happen, be radical about your self-care — that is, don’t just make it a “nice to have” practice in your routine. Make it a necessity. This is particularly important for professionals belonging to marginalized communities. Marginalized people face a disproportionate burden in society dealing with microaggressions, glass ceilings, and the like. Fortunately, prioritizing radical self-care can be a tool to counter some of the draining impacts of systemic racism, discrimination and trauma.
If you’re new to self-care, here’s what it can look like in practice. The three pillars of radical self-care involve the mind, body, and spirit which — contrary to popular belief — are not all separate entities working independently to keep you alive. They’re cooperators in your lived experience, and all work to keep you balanced and well for all of your endeavors. For practical purposes, let’s reframe mind, body, and spirit and refer to them respectively as mental and emotional, physical and purpose. Each area needs nourishment, so schedule time to engage in activities that provide that nourishment. Here are some ideas.
To nourish your mental and emotional wellbeing:
Have a lazy day.
Say “no” more often.
Limit your news consumption.
Spend time communing in nature.
To nourish your physical wellbeing:
Eat healthy foods.
Go on a walk.
Drink water.
Sleep 6-8 hours per day.
Hit the gym or go to a studio.
To nourish your purpose and get closer to it:
Meditate
Journal
Do a good deed.
Volunteer for a cause.
How to prioritize radical self-care
If you struggle to make time for yourself, try this: say “no.” I know it’s tough, but hear me out. When you say “no,” you make time for your “yes.” If you’re assigned an obligation that isn’t in your skillset and would take you days and weeks to figure out, you can say “no, thank you” and request it be assigned to someone else. If colleagues are meeting for drinks after work, but you know drinking alcohol isn’t great for your mental or physical wellbeing, simply say “no” and use that time to do something that nourishes your spirit instead.
When it comes to your family, if taking a half day away from the kids or family members would be nourishing to you, say no to obligations that force you to be present and find a way to negotiate some private time. You have more power with the word “no” than you might think.
For those with busy schedules, set aside a particular day or time of day as your radical self-care block — whether it’s every Friday or noon on weekdays. Tell your friends and colleagues you won’t be available and do something for you during that time slot. Don’t skip it when something comes up — instead, stick with it. Whether you’re simply going for a 30-minute walk on your lunch break or taking that time to journal and meditate, have a dedicated time every day or week that you can rely on to deepen your radical self-care practice.
Despite common belief, you don’t have to be “on” all the time, moving through the world as if you are impervious to trauma, stress and burnout. You can manage the effects of losing your stamina, falling out of touch with your purpose, and generally needing time to rest by implementing radical self-care.
That can look like saying “no” to obligations that drain you and assigning those obligations to someone else. It can look like taking mental health days once a week or month. It can look like actually using your paid time off instead of letting it accumulate for the holidays. Self-care can be more of a choice than we think, and it’s not a selfish choice. Prioritizing it in your professional and personal life can help you stay well and present for all of the endeavors and people that matter most.
There are plenty of gift guides out there for the fashion friend who has it all, for the person who loves to host dinner parties, or for the Zoomer in your life who has an average daily screen time of nine hours. There’s a large hole missing, though: a curated, thoughtful gift guide for your laziest, most sloth-like friend (read: me).
This has been a *year* with too many questionable, chaotic, and high-energy moments to count. While everyone is getting ready to celebrate the holidays and party 2023 away, I’m more than happy chilling at home under a weighted blanket and watching Sex and the City reruns. We all have a friend whose definition of fun is lighting a candle and reading or experimenting in the kitchen instead of going out on the town. For all the homebodies in our lives, it may be hard to gift them with something that feels exciting and fresh to capture their personality. Thankfully, as a lazy girl myself, I’ve rounded up more than 65 thoughtful gifts your besties will thank you for.
Below, shop all the best gifts for your introverted friends who love nothing more than to chill at home with a face mask on and a beverage of choice in hand. Happy shopping!
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