ReportWire

Tag: Recipes

  • 8 Ways to Impact Your Grandchildren

    8 Ways to Impact Your Grandchildren

    [ad_1]

    My oldest grandson just entered his last year of elementary school. The years have whizzed by in a flurry of sweet and sometimes salty photographs, each representing an opportunity to spend time with this blonde bundle of energy, who will become a full-fledged man in what seems a nanosecond. He would like my use of the word nanosecond, as it is so much more interesting than the word “second” and much more current than the expression “in the blink of an eye.”

    It has been said, “grandparents are a delightful blend of laughter, caring deeds, wonderful stories, and love.” I hope that my grandchildren would agree!

    As Christians, our view of how we choose to engage in the lives of our grandchildren can be guided fully by our faith, our deep desire to fulfill the call of Scripture to love others well, and by our strong desire to leave a legacy of God’s “righteousness with our children’s children,” Psalm 103:17. Let me share with you eight wise ways that you can have a rich and lasting impact on your grandchildren.

    1. Overflow With Unconditional Love

    Grandparents have a unique opportunity to be honest with themselves regarding the missteps that they may have made as parents, while aligning with the Psalmist in declaring, “Search me, O God, and know my heart” Psalm 139:23-24. In doing so, grandparents can move forward humbly and boldly in caring for their grandchildren with a truly Christ-informed mindset of love that is unconditional. Such love values grace over judgment, shuns comparison, and sees each individual grandchild as beautifully unique and made in the image of God.

    2. Lead a Healthy Lifestyle

    Four to five mornings a week, I stand in the downstairs powder room with my not-quite-four-year-old granddaughter and listen to Mickey Mouse sing the brush your teeth song. As I put toothpaste on her toothbrush this morning, she handed me my toothbrush. She stood on my little step stool, and the two of us made our teeth sparkle. We have all heard the phrase, “More is caught than taught.” Whether getting out and taking walks together or snacking on berries and juicy summer watermelon, healthy behavior catches on. It has the added potential benefit of grandma and papa being around for a long time!

    3. Be Present and Available

    It goes without saying that any truly good relationship has a foundation of ongoing and consistent interaction. One author calls this “the power of being there.” For grandparents who live near their grandchildren, this may take the shape of assisting with after-school care, a special weekend date, or simply showing up for special school programs and extra-curricular activities.

    Some crucial keys to significant grandparent-grandchild interactions are as follows: 1. Check-in with parents to clear outings and activities. 2. Always show up and be where you say you’ll be. 3. Focus on your grandchild in a loving and supportive manner. This is the present in being present!

    4. Be Intentional

    Even if your grand’s live far away, and you only have the opportunity to visit in person once a year or so, you still can create a present and meaningful relationship through intentional, planned visits that will focus on time with them. Throughout the year, caring deeds such as phone calls, FaceTime, handwritten letters, and thoughtful small gifts continue to move forward the connection you seek to build. A postcard from a trip you have gone on or a photograph can be a fun way to connect. You can even try being pen pals with your grandchild. Whatever your circumstance, the goal is to be intentional in building a strong, loving connection that will impact your grandchild throughout their lifetime.

    5. Have Fun!

    The beauty of fun is that it is just plain a good time. A grandparent, who is a blend of part laughter and part love, starts with a sense of play, allows for a pinch of silliness, and adds a whole lot of imagination. Counselor and pastor Charles Shedd noted, “Grandparents are, without a doubt, some of the world’s best educators.” It is amazing how we can share hobbies, a love of reading or nature skills, and all sorts of wisdom and wonder when we mix it with a generous portion of fun-having. Consider what your grandchildren already enjoy, and learn about it. Let them teach you a thing or two as well, or look for creative ways to present what you love and invite them into new learning worlds full of delight.

    6. Stay Relevant

    Two of the greatest missteps a grandparent can make in their relationship with their grandchild are losing their sense of what it was like to be young and scoffing at the changes or new trends that come along with each generation. As the older generation, we may want to imbue the younger ones we love with certain ideals and traditions. We may feel confused and dismayed when our well-meaning lessons fall on deaf ears. Remembering that we, too, were once the generation questioning traditions, and embracing new ideas, can help us to build common ground with our grandchildren. Ask questions, be curious about new technology and paradigms, and be willing to try something new when possible. Listen well without judgment, and seek to understand rather than point to the way things used to be. I am not suggesting you shrug off your faith or family values, but rather that you listen and love well in order to honor their interests and actively example your faith.

    7. Tell Your Story

    “Young people need something stable to hang on to – a culture connection, a sense of their own past, a hope for their future. Most of all they need what grandparents can give them.” Pastor J. Kesler

    Every grandparent has a story that has been written on their life by the hand of a loving and purposeful God. There are flawed parts that perhaps can only be shared carefully and with great wisdom when speaking to young hearts, but among these, there is tale after tale of redemption, kindness, and hope. All of these are part of the history that can be laced with humility and passed down to our descendants. These wonderful stories can unfold naturally as you enjoy a meal together, walk in the neighborhood, or drive to an outing. You can also share bits of history in notes and letters or even in a more formal legacy journal.

    8. Love Jesus by Example

    Psalm 92:14 encourages the older Christians to continue to bear fruit and stay fresh and green as they maintain relationships and righteousness through Jesus Christ. This Psalm creates a vivid word picture of a valuable life that leads others to God simply through a flourishing vitality in their faith. As grandparents, we may not always have the opportunity to share our faith verbally with our grandchildren, and if we do, it should always be supported by the actions of our daily life. As noted previously, godly grandparents can impact their grandchildren through an unconditional love that reflects well how God loves them and us. Grandparents can actively live out their faith in the day-to-day, seeking to exemplify a growing faith in God integrated into all aspects of life. It may be a simple prayer for travel safety as we evidence our reliance on and hope in God.

    Grandparents who value prayer for the powerful gift it is can become legacy-makers, deeply impacting the lives of their grandchildren through diligently praying for their grandchildren, and they can love them with biblical words of affirmation and blessing over their lives. Almost daily, as I buckle my youngest granddaughter into her car seat, I remind her that she is a gift from God. My oldest grandson often hears the words, “You are a fine young man of God.”  

    Billy Graham once noted, “The greatest legacy one can pass on to one’s grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one’s life, but rather a legacy of character and faith.”

    Within every grandparent is a great well of impact potential to influence the generations that come after with grace and truth. We can be not simply grandparents but also mentors, trusted allies, a place of safety, an inspiration to seek God, and a warm, delightful example of love and laughter. These are the makings of character and faith and the wise ways you can have a rich and lasting impact on your grandchildren.

    Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Maryna Andriichenko

    Stacey Monaco has been speaking and writing since her first unpublished children’s book in the fifth grade. Her journey as a writer has taken her from the depths of blue water exploration, to the simplicity of crafting words to encourage and educate in the areas of loss, legacy, leadership, and living life passionately with purpose. Stacey received her Masters Degree in Christian Ministry and Leadership from Talbot School of Theology, and has worked in many roles from slinging coffee to pastoring women. To find more on living the Christian life with intention, head over to her website at StaceyMonaco.com.

    [ad_2]

    Stacey Monaco

    Source link

  • Tulip Petals Are Edible: An Exquisitely Pretty Snack for Spring

    Tulip Petals Are Edible: An Exquisitely Pretty Snack for Spring

    [ad_1]

    One of the best things about being an adult: You’re allowed to play with your food. In spring, that means introducing edible ornamentation like tulip petals to everyday eats, transforming them from ordinarily good to effervescently appealing.

    Celebrate what you have. Celebrate flowers. Celebrate the privilege of a meal, and of feeding yourself, or friends. Honor food. Do not forget what others have lost, and are losing, as we speak. Give them a voice through your own actions, but do not stop living. Put spring on a plate. Appreciate every petal.

    Here’s an easy snack, and how I like to eat tulip petals in spring.

    Photography by Marie Viljoen.

    Above: Tender goat cheese atop firm tulip petals.

    Some years ago, when I was preparing a spring picnic for an intimate, outdoor engagement party, I ran out of edible flowers (I was using violets, dead nettle, and crabapple blossom). But I needed one more snack. A vaseful of perfect tulips was on the kitchen counter. “Hmmm,” I thought, speculatively. I dove into the internet—and emerged from that rabbit hole to tear the cupped petals gently from their stems. That is how a new spring treat was born: Goats’ cheese and tulip petals, amenable to almost infinite variation.

    Above: Tulips petals are best when the flower is open but not full-blown.

    Above: ‘Golden Apeldoorn’ tulips growing in my previous garden.

    Tulip petals are delicately firm and hold their shape well. Their flavor is mild, like a lightly floral lettuce, although some colors and cultivars can be more intense. For eating, your own, garden-grown tulips are ideal, because you know how they were cultivated, but growers like Moonshot Farm (who sell from their stand in New Jersey and at greenmarkets in New York City) offer bee-friendly blooms that are grown without synthetic pesticides and herbicides.

    Above: Picnic-bound tulips and chèvre, with henbit and bittercress.

    For picnicking, the tulip petals offer a gentle nest for smooth balls of goats’ cheese mixed with cream (the cream smooths that mildly chalky, goaty edge that fresh chèvre sometimes has). These petal rafts also steady the balls, which have a tendency to roll about, en route.

    Above: Spring on a plate.

    These treats are the easiest finger food, eaten just so, or schmeared onto a cracker or piece of bread. Another advantage of using fresh goat cheese is that fewer people have an intolerance towards it, if they are lactose-sensitive.

    Above: Dusted with sumac, the snacks take on a different personality.

    The variations are easy and effective: Finish these cheese bites with different spices. I use black pepper, sumac, Aleppo pepper and urfa biber, ramp leaf salt, or smoked salt flakes. And the hyper-seasonal toppings might be sourced no further than your lawn or windowbox: chickweed, bittercress, the tiny flowers of dead nettle, henbit, or ground ivy.

    [ad_2]

    Source link

  • UNSTUFFED PEPPER SKILLET

    UNSTUFFED PEPPER SKILLET

    [ad_1]

    This unstuffed pepper skillet is so easy to make and one of our favorites. If you love stuffed green peppers this is the dish for you!

    Unstuffed Pepper SkilletUnstuffed Pepper Skillet

    One of our most popular recipes is the Stuffed Green Peppers! If you haven’t tried our recipe, you should, it has many 5 star reviews and delicious!

    ❤️WHY WE LOVE THIS RECIPE

    We love how easy this recipe is to make. You can use precooked rice if you to save on some time. This dish reheats well and it has a great flavor. Great for a busy week as you can enjoy this for a few nights in a row.

    🍴KEY INGREDIENTS

    • Italian Sausage
    • White onion
    • Green peppers
    • Italian Style diced tomatoes
    • Beef broth
    • White rice, uncooked – see notes
    • Garlic
    • Italian seasoning
    • Black pepper

    SWAPS

    You can easily switch up the meat, use ground beef or ground turkey. If you don’t have beef broth you can use chicken broth.

    🍽️HOW TO MAKE

    This dish is really easy to make and of our favorites!

    Step 1
    In large skillet, brown sausage, onion and garlic over medium heat for about 4-6 minutes. Next add in peppers, Italian seasoning and pepper. You may have to drain the fat off of the meat you use, I did’t have to with this sausage.

    Step 2
    Cook until peppers are beginning to soften, then add both cans of diced tomatoes and beef broth, mix well and bring to a boil. Once the mixture is boiling add in your uncooked rice and continue to boil for another minute or two, then turn down heat, cover and let simmer for 30-35 minutes.

    Step 3
    I did stir this a few times to ensure the rice was mixed in well with the juices and cooking. Also you will have to check to make sure your rice is cooked, times may vary.  Top with cheese if you desire.

    Notes:
    To make this process easier use precooked rice, you will need 2 cups of cooked rice. I would  bring mixture to a boil, let simmer for 25 minutes then add the precooked rice. You could also make rice on the side and serve this dish over rice. Either way it will still be delicious!

    Unstuffed Pepper SkilletUnstuffed Pepper Skillet

    ⭐TIP

    If you read the comments on this recipe people used cauliflower rice and loved it. Other great suggestions in the comments!

    RECIPE VARIATIONS

    If you love green pepper recipes, add these to your menu!

    SERVE THIS WITH

    ❓FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

    I can’t find Italian Style diced tomatoes, what can I use?

    They may not say “Italian style” but they are made with basil and oregano. Look for those.

    We don’t like onions, can I leave them out?

    I think that would be fine!

    SERVING SIZE, STORING & REHEATING

    This makes about 8 servings and reheats well. Just store in a Tupperware container in the fridge.

    Unstuffed Pepper Skillet

    Anne Walkup

    This Unstuffed Green Pepper Skillet recipe is one you’ll make over and over again it has wonderful review and it’s great on a busy night!

    Prep Time 10 minutes

    Cook Time 35 minutes

    Total Time 45 minutes

    Course Main Course

    Cuisine American

    • 1 lb of Italian Sausage
    • 1/2 cup of white onion chopped
    • 2 cups of green peppers chopped
    • 2 14.5 ounce cans of Italian Style diced tomatoes
    • 1 14.5 ounce can of beef broth
    • 1 cup of white rice uncooked
    • 2 cloves of garlic
    • 1 teaspoon of Italian seasoning
    • 1/2 teaspoon of black pepper

    • In large skillet, brown sausage, onion and garlic over medium heat for about 4-6 minutes. Next add in peppers, Italian seasoning and pepper. You may have to drain the fat off of the meat you use, I did’t have to with this sausage.

    • Cook until peppers are beginning to soften, then add both cans of diced tomatoes and beef broth, mix well and bring to a boil.

    • Once the mixture is boiling add in your uncooked rice and continue to boil for another minute or two, then turn down heat, cover and let simmer for 30-35 minutes. I did stir this a few times to make sure the rice was really getting mixed in well with the juices and cooking

    • Top with cheese if you desire.

    You will have to check to make sure your rice is cooked, times may vary. To make this process easier use 2 cups of precooked rice. I would bring mixture to a boil, let simmer for 25 minutes then add the precooked rice. You could also make rice on the side and serve this dish over rice. Either way it will still be delicious!

    Keyword Unstuffed Green Pepper Skillet

    Let us know by commenting below!

    Follow us on Pinterest!

    Are you reading our magazine?

    Join 1000’s of others and start a subscription today. Full of new recipes, inspiring stories, country living, and much more.

    © The Southern Lady Cooks photos and text – All rights reserved. No copying, posting on other sites, or other uses allowed without written permission of the copyright holder.

    [ad_2]

    Anne Walkup

    Source link

  • How Should Christians View the ‘Tradwife’ Trend?

    How Should Christians View the ‘Tradwife’ Trend?

    [ad_1]

    The trendy “tradwife” movement. What’s this all about, really? The term trad wife, which denotes the view of a traditional wife with traditional values, was originally displayed about six years ago when several millennial and zoomer housewives took to social media and showcased their idealistic, domesticated lifestyles. 

    These young ladies began to glamorize the iconic All-American 1950s woman as they posted pictures donning the classic fit and flare dress with attached apron and pump high highs. Whether they are placing meals on the table for their family with a glistening smile, vacuuming their immaculate homes, or greeting their husbands at the end of the day with a passionate kiss, the message is to showcase traditional gender roles and the culture of that nostalgic time era. In the time when men were the sole breadwinners and providers, women stayed home and were caretakers.

    According to Estee Williams, a 25-year-old trad wife and TikTok influencer who inspires women how to cook, clean, and maintain beauty for their husbands, “a tradwife submits to her husband and serves her family. This concept is not degrading or considered to be of lesser value than him. This is more common with traditional Christians.” Many of her recent videos share how to find a masculine man and dish out advice for high school girls who are questioning and eager to learn more about her “old school” lifestyle.

    @esteecwilliams What it means to be a Tradwife. #fyp #tradwife #homemaking #housewife #traditional #tradwifecontroversy #womenschoice ♬ Music Instrument – Gerhard Siagian

    While this concept continues to grow and gain momentum on nearly every social media platform, gaining traction, it is apparent that a younger generation of women is seeking men who will lead, provide, and protect them (Ephesians 5: 25-33). However, this movement hasn’t come without a spark of controversy, even among the faith-based circles.

    How should we respond to this tradwife movement through a Biblical lens?

    The phenomenon of a traditional, simpler, and older way of life is nothing new. After all, it’s the cycle of life as families pass down their traditions to their children. It is common for children to take on some of those customs and part ways with others, maybe starting something new. This is where we see old-fashioned ethics and new terms like “trad wife” come into play. 

    However, these homemade definitions are not synonymous with the Biblical housewife portrayed in Proverbs 31 or Titus 2. Where the tradwife focuses on some Biblical views, it completely misses the mark on others. While there are distinct gender roles noted in God’s Word, we are all called to submit to Christ, first and foremost (James 4:7), and then to one another in marriage (Ephesians 5:21).

    Where a tradwife focuses on outward appearances and the authority of her husband, Biblical womanhood encourages marriage to be rooted in faith and glorify God – together. Marriage is a servanthood where a husband is called to love his wife as Christ did the church, and a wife is called to submit to her husband so that he can lead in confidence. There is mutual love, respect, and honor (Ephesians 5:21-33). 

    The Proverbs 31 woman seeks after God’s heart (Mark 12:30), embraces her role as mother and wife, cares for her feminine beauty (1 Peter 3:3-4), is a cheerful giver (2 Corinthians 9:6-8), serves with a gracious heart, and walks with purpose, seeking God’s will and way for her life. This could mean working in or outside of the home.

    Titus 2 is generally an older (wiser) woman who is portrayed as a role model and mentor for young ladies, training them to trust God and walk in obedience. They share the real meaning behind submission, which is to walk with dignity and grace, honoring God’s design for marriage and encouraging young wives to serve and love their husbands and families with compassion.

    Like with any cultural trend, we need to be careful not to be swept away by all its enticing and enamoring effects and choose to seek God’s will and way for our lives by digging into His Word and seeking Truth. The beauty of God’s Word is that it never changes (Psalm 119:89, Isaiah 40:8, Malachi 3:6). In a world that is forever evolving, His Word remains the same. We can count on that—it’s a promise!

    Photo Courtesy: ©Getty Images/Alexandra Girard
    Video Courtesy: esteecwilliams via TikTok

    Alicia Searl is a devotional author, blogger, and speaker that is passionate about pouring out her heart and pointing ladies of all ages back to Jesus. She has an education background and master’s in literacy.  Her favorite people call her Mom, which is why much of her time is spent cheering them on at a softball game or dance class. She is married to her heartthrob (a tall, spiky-haired blond) who can whip up a mean latte. She sips that goodness while writing her heart on a page while her puppy licks her feet. Visit her website at aliciasearl.com and connect with her on Instagram and Facebook.

    [ad_2]

    Alicia Searl

    Source link

  • Mugwort in the Spring: An Edible and Tender Delicate Herb

    Mugwort in the Spring: An Edible and Tender Delicate Herb

    [ad_1]

    Spring is sprung, the mugwort is riz (at least in Brooklyn, New York). I wonder where the mower is? Because the first, silvery tufts of spring mugwort have emerged after winter in a flocked carpet visible from a distance. Their arrival, while nights still hold a hard chill, is met with joy, indifference, or despair, depending on who you are, where you are, and, if you’re a professional horticulturist, who you work for. While Artemisia vulgaris (and some very similar species) is a botanical super-invader in North America, it is also a very useful herb. It is one of the first perennials to break ground, and feathery spring mugwort is a delicate and sustainable wild treat, inspiring that joy for cooks sensitive to the changing of the seasons. Collect a tender bagful, and make a meal to accompany a conversation about the situation.

    Photography by Marie Viljoen.

    Above: Spring mugwort is tiny, belying it’s substantial height by the end of summer.

    Mugwort is a perennial plant that spreads via undergound stolons. It also germinates from seeds very easily, as I have learned after shaking out my late summer forage-basket on our terrace and seeing miniature mugworts pop up in my pots in the spring. The plant is hard to control and exceptionally difficult to remove where it has invaded wild, natural areas. It out-thugs even tenacious native plants like common milkweed. It is a useful and welcome fresh or dried herb, though.

    Above: The first spring mugwort leaves are very tender.

    Spring mugwort, if you spin the story just right, is a pretty edible treat. (The spin is to emphasize that foraging for mugwort does the environment where it is invasive no harm whatsoever.) Unlike its late summer iteration, which is chewy, potent, and pungent, these leaves of early mugwort are very tender and very mild in flavor.

    Above: A pot of beans, loaded with aromatics and spring mugwort.

    In the bean stew recipe that follows, spring mugwort is blanched in the cooking broth, before being added as a green, edible garnish to the beans. This stew can be eaten in three ways. Way One: As is, as a rustic, nourishing soup-stew. Way Two: The flavor is intensified exponentially when the beans are drained and the broth is reduced to a glaze. Eat beans in rich glazed broth. Way Three: Once the broth is reduced, the beans are turned into a creamy purée whose foundation is that umami-heavy glaze.

    Above: Mugwort blanching in the reduced cooking broth.
    Above: Once blanched, the spring mugwort sprigs adorn the velvety beans.
    Above: The beans can also be puréed to make a portable vegan pâté (here garnished with garlic mustard).

    Above: Spring mugwort and bean pâté on focaccia.

    [ad_2]

    Source link

  • HOBO BREAD, OLD FASHIONED RECIPE

    HOBO BREAD, OLD FASHIONED RECIPE

    [ad_1]

    Hob Bread is an old-fashioned recipe that your Grandmother may have made in a coffee can. It has no eggs, and it’s absolutely wonderful and has fantastic reviews.

    Hobo BreadHobo Bread

    If you love making your own quick breads, you will love our Best Banana Bread Ever! It has so many amazing comments and it’s wonderful.

    ❤️WHY WE LOVE THIS RECIPE

    It is an old fashioned recipe that dates back as far as the pioneers.  There are hundreds of different versions of hobo bread around.  A lot of recipes for this bread call for soaking the raisins overnight with the soda and making this bread in coffee cans.  I don’t have time for all that!  This is my recipe that works great for me and my family loves it.  Slather this bread with some butter while it’s warm, serve with coffee, tea or milk for a delicious treat anytime. 

    🍴KEY INGREDIENTS

    • Raisins
    • Boiling water
    • All-purpose flour
    • Sugar
    • Salt
    • Baking soda
    • Vanilla extract
    • Butter
    • Pecans or walnuts

    SWAPS

    You can add spices, nuts, fruits or whatever you like to this bread. Not a fan of raisins, you can use craisins or simply leave them out. Very few recipes for hobo bread contain eggs and I don’t put them in this one.  The bread holds together fine without the eggs. 

    🍽️HOW TO MAKE

    The longest part of this process is soaking the raisins!

    COOKING STEPS

    Step 1
    Bring water to a boil, remove from heat, add raisins and let sit for one hour.  Do not pour off extra water. 

    Step 2
    Whisk together flour, sugar, salt, baking soda in a large bowl.  Pour in soaked raisins with extra water, vanilla extract and butter.  Mix with a spoon.  Fold in nuts.  

    Step 3
    Spray a 9 x 5 loaf pan with cooking spray.  Spread dough in pan.  Bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 45 to 50 minutes or until center tests done. Remove from oven and cool in pan for 10 minutes before removing.  You could add a powdered sugar glaze to this bread if desired. 

    Hobo BreadHobo Bread

    ⭐TIP

    You can make this with craisins if you are not a fan of raisins. Also be sure and read the comments on this recipe, many wonderful suggestions!

    OTHER BREAD RECIPES

    If you have followed our site for any amount of time, you know we love to make quick breads and enjoy them with coffee. Here are a few of our favorites:

    ❓FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

    What do you mean by “quick” bread?

    Quick breads are breads that are made without yeast and do not need any proofing. You must mix them and bake!

    This has no milk or eggs, is that correct?

    Yes, the recipe is correct as written.

    STORING AND REHEATING

    We just store this in foil and heat in the microwave if we want a slice warm.

    SERVING SIZE

    This makes one loaf and about 6-8 servings depending on how you slice it.

    Hobo Bread

    Anne Walkup

    This is an old fashioned recipe for hobo bread that goes back to the pioneers! Easy to make and absolutely delicious. Great reviews! It’s a quick bread your family will love. No eggs or milk needed.

    Prep Time 1 hour 15 minutes

    Cook Time 50 minutes

    Total Time 2 hours 5 minutes

    Course bread

    Cuisine American, southern

    • 1 cup raisins
    • 1 cup boiling water
    • 2 cups all-purpose flour
    • 3/4 cup sugar
    • 1/2 teaspoon salt
    • 2 teaspoons baking soda
    • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
    • 3 tablespoons melted butter
    • 1/2 cup broken pecans or walnuts

    • Bring water to a boil, remove from heat, add raisins and let sit for one hour Do not pour off extra water. Whisk together flour, sugar, salt, baking soda in a large bowl. Pour in soaked raisins with extra water, vanilla extract and butter. Mix with a spoon

    • Fold in nuts. Spray a 9 x 5 loaf pan with cooking spray. Spread dough in pan. Bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 45 to 50 minutes or until center tests done. Remove from oven and cool in pan for 10 minutes before removing. You could add a powdered sugar glaze to this bread if desired. Makes 1 loaf

    Keyword hobo bread, old fashioned bread recipe

    Let us know by commenting below!

    Follow us on Pinterest!

    Are you reading our magazine?

    Join 1000’s of others and start a subscription today. Full of new recipes, inspiring stories, country living, and much more.

    © The Southern Lady Cooks photos and text – All rights reserved. No copying, posting on other sites, or other uses allowed without written permission of the copyright holder.

    [ad_2]

    Anne Walkup

    Source link

  • CHEESY FUNERAL POTATOES

    CHEESY FUNERAL POTATOES

    [ad_1]

    These funeral potatoes are made with hashbrowns, sour cream and cheese! Topped with cornflakes and so delicious!

    Cheesy Funeral PotatoesCheesy Funeral Potatoes

    If you love this dish you may want to try this Mashed Potato Casserole! It’s a family favorite and we love it at our holiday dinners.

    ❤️WHY WE LOVE THIS RECIPE

    This recipe uses frozen hashbrowns, which saves a lot of time. You don’t have to peel potatoes; you can just throw everything together and bake it. It’s a very easy recipe to put together! No thawing necessary!

    🍴KEY INGREDIENTS

    • Frozen diced hash brown potatoes (no need to thaw)
    • Cream of chicken soup (do not dilute)
    • Sour cream
    • Green onion or regular onion (optional)
    • Black pepper
    • Salt
    • Garlic powder (optional)
    • Butter, divided
    • Shredded cheddar cheese, divided
    • Crushed corn flakes

    SWAPS

    You can use whatever cheese you like or use a combination of cheeses. If you are not a fan of onion, simply leave it out. I think you could use cream of celery or cream of mushroom soup as well.

    🍽️HOW TO MAKE

    This dish is so easy to make and your family will love it!

    COOKING STEPS

    Step 1
    Combine cream of chicken soup, sour cream, chopped green onions, black pepper, salt, garlic powder and 3 tablespoons of the butter, (melted plus 1/2 cup of the cheddar cheese in a large bowl. Mix with a spoon.

    Step 2
    Pour in frozen potatoes and toss to coat with the soup mixture. Spray a 9 x 13 baking dish with cooking spray and spread the potatoes in the dish. Combine the two cups of crushed cornflakes with the remaining 3 tablespoons of melted butter and sprinkle over potatoes. Add remaining 1/2 cup of cheese on top.

    Step 3
    Cover the casserole with foil and bake in a preheated 350-degree oven for 60 minutes. Remove the foil and bake for another 15 minutes to brown the top of the casserole. You can garnish with additional chopped green onions or fresh chopped parsley.

    Cheesy Funeral PotatoesCheesy Funeral Potatoes

    ⭐TIP

    You don’t have to thaw the hashbrowns before cooking! You could easily add ham to this recipe!

    OTHER POTATO RECIPES

    If you love this recipe you will want to check out these delicious potato recipes!

    • Old Fashioned Stewed Potatoes – This recipe is one your Grandmother probably made! Simple, budget friendly but so good and wonderful with fried cornbread.
    • Fried Potato Cakes – These are a delicious appetizer and wonderful to make with leftover mashed potatoes.
    • Southern Fried Potatoes – These are a classic for a reason! Fried potatoes will never go out of style.

    SERVE THIS WITH

    These funeral potatoes go with just about anything but these are our favorites!

    ❓FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

    Do you thaw the potatoes?

    No, you don’t have to thaw the potatoes.

    My family doesn’t like sour cream, can you taste it?

    No you can’t taste it.

    STORING AND REHEATING

    We store this in the refrigerator and reheat in the microwave or in the oven.

    SERVING SIZE

    This makes around 10 servings.

    Cheesy Funeral Potatoes

    Anne Walkup

    This cheesy potato casserole is absolutely delicious. It is also referred to as Funerla Potatoes. The perfect side dish to any meal and would be wonderful to take to a gathering or serve during the holidays.

    Prep Time 15 minutes

    Cook Time 1 hour

    Total Time 1 hour 15 minutes

    Course Side Dish

    Cuisine American, southern

    • 1 (32 ounce) bag frozen diced hash brown potatoes (no need to thaw
    • 1 (10.5 ounce) can cream of chicken soup (do not dilute
    • 1 cup sour cream
    • 1/2 cup chopped green onion or regular onion optional
    • 1/2 teaspoon black pepper
    • 1/2 teaspoon salt
    • 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder optional
    • 6 tablespoons butter divided
    • 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese divided
    • 2 cups crushed corn flakes

    • Combine cream of chicken soup, sour cream, chopped green onions, black pepper, salt, garlic powder and 3 tablespoons of the butter, (melted plus 1/2 cup of the cheddar cheese in a large bowl. Mix with a spoon.

    • Pour in frozen potatoes and toss to coat with the soup mixture. Spray a 9 x 13 baking dish with cooking spray and spread the potatoes in the dish. Combine the two cups of crushed cornflakes with the remaining 3 tablespoons of melted butter and sprinkle over potatoes. Add remaining 1/2 cup of cheese on top.

    • Cover the casserole with foil and bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 60 minutes. Remove foil and bake for another 15 minutes to brown top of casserole. Can garnish with additional chopped green onions or fresh chopped parsley.

    Let us know by commenting below!

    Follow us on Pinterest!

    Are you reading our magazine?

    Join 1000’s of others and start a subscription today. Full of new recipes, inspiring stories, country living, and much more.

    © The Southern Lady Cooks photos and text – All rights reserved. No copying, posting on other sites, or other uses allowed without written permission of the copyright holder.

    [ad_2]

    Anne Walkup

    Source link

  • Why People Pleasing Is Not What God Wants for You

    Why People Pleasing Is Not What God Wants for You

    [ad_1]

    Have you noticed the influx of media marketing lately? Post after post offers seminars or curriculum to help you “be the best you” that you can be because you deserve to live your dreams or change the world with your passion.

    Am I the only one who feels pangs of anxiety when I look over these posts? There is almost a subliminal message that says:

    • You aren’t good enough. 
    • You need to try harder. 
    • Everyone else is resolving to do better.
    • You had better keep up the pace.

    I don’t know about you, but the very idea of these accusations sends me looking for a paper bag to breathe into.

    When I start to feel overwhelmed by a barrage of “shoulda, woulda, coulda” thinking, I have learned it’s time to stop the voice in my head. 

    I don’t know about you, but comparing myself to others is exhausting. Yet, being a middle child and a born people-pleaser, my natural default is to compare myself to those more motivated than me. And when I do that I lose––every time.

    Lose what? I’m glad you asked. 

    Living for the approval of others is never a worthy goal. Let’s face it; people pleasing is a moving target. We’ve all heard “You can’t please all the people all the time,” so if you’re a people pleaser, you will exhaust yourself trying to measure up to everyone else’s standard for success.

    When you bow to the standard of others, you’ll also lose peace of mind. Because you will constantly compare yourself to how others are doing, or change your goals based on the comments of others. 

    So, what can you do? For me freedom from people pleasing came in a number of ways. First and foremost was when I surrendered my life to Jesus as my Lord and Savior because the Spirit of God gave me new life in Christ. 

    Once enslaved to my trespasses and sins, I found God set me free. By the power of His indwelling Spirit, God’s peace began to rule in my heart and mind in Christ Jesus (see Romans 6 and Philippians 4:7).

    When I realized that God created me for His glory and not my own, I learned the most important person to please was the Lord my God. Wow––what a relief!

    No longer did I need to seek the approval of others. 

    The only standard I had to live up to was the one Jesus called me to in relationship with Him.

    So what is that standard? 

    In Mark 12:30-31, the religious leaders asked Jesus what was the priority of life. Jesus’ response was two-fold:

    1. Love God with all of your being.
    2. Love others.

    Now, don’t be tempted to simplify this statement to mean, “God doesn’t care about my sin; all that matters is love.” Because the truth is, if you’re loving God with your whole being, then the evidence of that love is your desire to walk in obedience to His commands. 

    Jesus said, “If you love me you will keep my commandments” (John 14:15). So, there’s no way around it. If you’re going to please God alone then your love for Him will cause you to walk in obedience to Him.

    The second part of Jesus’ response in Mark 12 was to love others as we love ourselves. Here’s the interesting part of that statement. We cannot love others in the selfless way God commands until we are living in love with Jesus. Because when we love Him properly, what spills out of us is His selfless love for others.

    When you live to know and love the Lord and His love spills out of your life onto those around you, you will have learned the secret to breaking free of people-pleasing.

    You see, as you draw near to God, He promises to draw near to you. And the closer you walk to Jesus, the more clearly you will have the mind of Christ to discern what He would have you do with your life––rather than comparing yourself to what others are doing with their lives (see James 4:8, 1 Corinthians 2:16).

    There is nothing wrong with looking ahead to set some God-driven goals. You would be wise to daily spend quiet time alone with the Lord to seek His will for your life.

    But more important than setting goals is the time you spend with Jesus. Because time with Him through prayer, Bible Study, and waiting in His presence is the secret to living the life you were meant to live.  

    And when you resolve to live in His presence, you will find the key to freedom from people pleasing.

    Rhonda Stoppe is a pastor’s wife, speaker, and author. As the NO REGRETS WOMAN, Rhonda has more than 20 years experience of helping women live life with no regrets. Through humor, and honest communication, she helps women build NO REGRETS LIVES by applying sound teaching from Scripture. Rhonda appears on radio programs, speaks at women’s events, MOPs, and homeschool conventions throughout the nation. Rhonda Stoppe’s book Moms Raising Sons to be Men is mentoring thousands of moms to guide sons toward a no-regrets life. Her new book If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy: And Other Myths Wives Believe is helping countless women build no-regrets marriages. 

    Photo credit: ©GettyImages/jacoblund

    Publication date: January 16, 2017

    [ad_2]

    Rhonda Stoppe

    Source link

  • Debunking the Myth That All Bachelors in Their 30s and 40s Are Immature

    Debunking the Myth That All Bachelors in Their 30s and 40s Are Immature

    [ad_1]

    There is a common myth that all single men in their thirties and forties are immature. While this is a common belief, it is not true. In some cases, it may be true, but one should not be dogmatic in saying that all single men who are in their thirties and forties are immature. This is a statement that cannot be backed up with truth because it is not based on any solid foundation. 

    Rather, people try to claim single men within this age range are immature because they are not married. It is important to note that just because a person is not married does not mean they are immature. In the same way, just because a person is married does not mean they are mature. It is incorrect to define a person’s maturity based on whether they are married or not.

    Instead of judging men based on their marital status, you need to look at them as individuals. You do not know the reason behind why they are bachelors in their thirties and forties. It could be they have dedicated their life to following Jesus, haven’t found anyone they truly love yet, or have other focuses in life. Therefore, it is important to debunk the myth that all bachelors in their thirties and forties are immature.

    Measuring Maturity 

    Measuring maturity by a person’s marital status is not wise. As mentioned, being married or not is not a measuring rod for a person’s maturity levels. If anything, bachelors in their thirties and forties may be more mature than you think. Many people believe that bachelors are selfish and only care about themselves, but this is not true. There are many reasons why a single man may choose to stay single. 

    Oftentimes it is their maturity that helps them choose to be unmarried. Within the Christian community, there is a false belief that marriage is the end goal or the ultimate form of happiness. This is not true as our goal as Christians needs to be helping other people come to know Christ and maturing in our own walk with God. Not everyone will get married, but it does not make them any less of a person. 

    If a bachelor chooses to stay unmarried, the Apostle Paul actually says this is better (1 Corinthians 7:25-40). Tragically, many Christians are distorting the Word of God by condemning those who choose to stay single. There is absolutely nothing wrong with staying single for a male or female. If a Christian decides in their heart to stay unmarried and chooses to spend their time focused on God, this is a noble thing. Never should other Christians condemn individuals who choose to stay unmarried. Even the term “bachelor” can be seen as derogatory. 

    Reasons to Stay Unmarried

    It is also important to note that there are many reasons why a man may choose to stay unmarried, even if he is in his thirties or forties. As mentioned earlier, it could be because he is choosing to dedicate his life to following Jesus, hasn’t found the one, or is choosing to spend time bettering himself. While many people might see these things as selfish, they are not. Sadly, men tend to be seen as “lazy,” “selfish,” or “immature” for not being married, but these aren’t blanket statements to apply to all men. 

    Rather, it is important to look at the individual and not pass judgment on them. You never know why a person chooses to stay unmarried unless you truly know them and they open up to you. Even if you may personally believe everyone should get married does not mean that this is what everyone else believes. In fact, it is not even what God says. 

    Nowhere in the Bible do we see God promising marriage to all people. Marriage is a gift, but singleness is also a gift. Unfortunately, within Christian culture, people do not tend to treat singleness as a gift. Instead, they treat it as a great tragedy or something that should be avoided at all costs. This is not a healthy way to think nor is it biblical. Whether a person gets married or not, they can still live a life to the glory of God. A person doesn’t have to be married to follow God, serve Him, or glorify Him in their actions. 

    It could also be someone stays unmarried because they have gone through a bad breakup in the past or they might even be divorced. Due to their bad relationships in the past, they might feel unsafe opening up to someone again. It could be that they still love the person that ended things with them or they are trying to heal from the wounds. Nonetheless, do not judge someone’s maturity or morality based on their marital status. It is not wise and will only lead to pushing this person away from the community of believers. 

    Do Not Pass Judgment 

    The Lord tells us plainly to not judge others (Matthew 7:1). Judging others is not within our responsibility. Judgment is God’s responsibility. He will judge everyone in accordance with His perfect rule. Rather than choosing to pass judgment on men who stay single in their thirties and forties, we need to encourage them to live their lives for the glory of God. Being single does not count you out for living the abundant life that Jesus died for (John 10:10).

    If you have been in the habit of looking down on men who are unmarried, try to change the narrative. Look at the man individually and see how he is living. Is he kind? Is he living to the glory of God? Is he trying his best to help others know Jesus? If you find he is doing all of these things, there is no reason to think badly of him or to think he is immature. Rather, he is just a man who has chosen to remain single.

    Choosing to remain single is a personal decision. It does not have to be approved by people. Whether a person gets married or stays single, they can still live their lives to the glory of God. The Lord looks at our hearts (1 Samuel 16:7)—he does not look at our marital status. If you are a single man in your thirties or forties, know that God will do wonderful things with your life and your singleness. 

    Oftentimes, Christian singles can do the most for God because they are worried about pleasing the Lord rather than pleasing a spouse (1 Corinthians 7:32-35). Therefore, there is nothing immature about this. Living for God, dedicating all of your time to the Lord, and helping others come to know Him are all very mature things to do. There is beauty in marriage and there is also beauty in singleness. 

    Instead of trying to say one is better or more mature, we need to see married couples and singles as equals. In no way is one more superior than the other. As believers, we are to live in unity with one another, but we cannot do this if there are believers condemning other believers because they have chosen not to be married or have not gotten married by a certain age. There needs to be unity within the family of believers or there will only be disorder. 

    Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Andrey Maximenko

    Vivian Bricker loves Jesus, studying the Word of God, and helping others in their walk with Christ. She has earned a Bachelor of Arts and Master’s degree in Christian Ministry with a deep academic emphasis in theology. Her favorite things to do are spending time with her family and friends, reading, and spending time outside. When she is not writing, she is embarking on other adventures.

    [ad_2]

    Vivian Bricker

    Source link

  • 3 Lessons in Love from the Author of ‘Amazing Grace’

    3 Lessons in Love from the Author of ‘Amazing Grace’

    [ad_1]

    John Newton is known as the author of Amazing Grace. Newton was always astounded by the grace he received. Towards the end of his life he said “Although my memory’s fading, I remember two things very clearly; I am a great sinner and Christ is a great Savior.”

    The dearest love in the heart of Newton was the Lord Jesus. But there was another great love that Newton sometimes feared was a rival to his affection for Christ. That rival was his sweet Polly—also known as Mary Catlett and the would-be wife of John Newton. This is their love story.

    Love At First Sight? 

    It is rather doubtful that John Newton and Mary (Polly) Catlett had feelings of love at first sight. Rather, it’s far more likely that they were fighting over a beloved toy. Elizabeth Newton and Elizabeth Catlett, best friends, had joked that perhaps the then 6-year-old John might Mary the then 3-year-old Polly. Yet even the faintest hopes of their union would seem to have been an impossibility when John’s mother died a year later, and young John was sent off to boarding school.

    It would be almost a decade later that the two would “meet.” And on this occasion, at least for John, it was love at first sight. As one biographer wrote: “Almost at first sight of this girl, then under fourteen years of age, he was impressed with such an affection for her as appears to have equaled all that the writers of romance have imagined.”[1]

    Just as Gilligan’s “three hour tour” turned into three seasons of television, so also did the smitten Newton’s quick visit turn into a three week stay. Though he was so overtaken by Polly that he mentally replanned his entire life, the young girl was unable to return those affections. And Newton was compelled to serve in the British Navy.

    It would be four years that John was away at sea. Though he kept his love for Polly alive, those four years had hardened and shaped Newton into a rebellious and vulgar sailor. Though he would now reject any notion of God, he still had a heart for this young lady who captivated him years prior. As Newton would tell it:

    “I soon lost,” says he, “all sense of religion and became deaf to the remonstrances of conscience and prudence: but my regard for her was always the same, and I may, perhaps, venture to say, that none of the scenes of misery and wickedness I afterward experienced ever banished her a single hour together from my waking thoughts for the seven following years.”[2]

    But soon, his affections would be transformed by another.

    Newton’s Fateful Voyage

    While on a slave trading voyage, Newton the sailor was caught in a violent storm. And it was here that for the first time in many years Newton prayed. He was not entirely changed at this point, but it began the first seeds of a deep heart change Newton would experience.

    John, who had been corresponding through Polly’s aunt, met some great disappointment. He believed himself unworthy of Polly and decided to break it off. Finances were also an issue. He knew he could not provide the financial stability that the Catlett’s would need to see in order to entrust their beloved Mary to him. His sensibilities, having been somewhat reformed by this storm and now meeting this new discouragement, John decided to end the romance.

    Unbeknownst to him, though, his father and the Catlett family had already arranged an engagement between the two. There was only one sticking point—Polly. What would she think of this arrangement? Newton was unsure and often found himself tongue-tied around her. He wrote her by letter to see if she felt the same about him. When she responded, though cautiously, that she shared at least some affection, John was over the moon.

    Newton continued his time on a slave ship, hoping to earn a solid living so he could propose marriage. It is difficult to say whether Newton had been actually converted at this point. He doesn’t develop evangelical views until a few years later. But by 1753, we know that his heart was indeed captured by another—the Lord Jesus. He wrote to his, now wife Polly, “I wish to limit my passion within those bounds which God has appointed.”

    A Happy Marriage

    On February 1, 1750, John Newton and Mary (Polly) Catlett were united in marriage. They would remain together until 1790, when Polly died of breast cancer. Their affections for one another were deep. In 1793, to honor her, John published two volumes of letters that he had sent to Mary throughout their marriage.

    They understood that their marriage was a gift from God. Newton once wrote to his wife:

    For, when I take up my pen, and begin to consider what I shall say, I am led to think of the goodness of God, who has made you mine, and given me a heart to value you. Thus my love to you, and my gratitude to him, cannot be separated. And, as you are so good to prize my affection, by finding it thus accompanied, you may be assured of its being unalterable. All other love that is not thus connected with a dependence upon God must be precarious. To this want I attribute many unhappy marriages. I believe many persons fall from their hopes of satisfaction in that state, by degrees insensible to themselves; and a secret change, or alienation of mind from each other takes place before they are well aware of it; till, in time, they proceed to such lengths as they would once have judged impossible.[3]

    Newton believed that their happy marriage was a direct result of their love for Christ. It became the immovable foundation for their love for one another. This love continued through all of their years. Newton wrote in 1770: “I can remember when the sun seemed to shine in vain, and the whole creation appeared as a blank if you were from me. Not that I love you less. The intercourse of many successive years has endeared you more and more to my heart.”[4]

    This love endured through many years of ministry. In 1764, John Newton became rector of the Church at Olney. It was during this time that he developed a friendship with William Cowper. Cowper was often depressed and suicidal and would require almost constant supervision by the Newtons. During this time as pastor of Olney, Newton’s fame grew as his Authentic Narrative was published.

    He kept this post in Olney until 1779, when the couple moved to London. This provided far more luxury and comfort but perhaps even more busyness. From Olney and throughout his ministry in London, John was very busy, and this would have likely added some strain to their message—but their dedication to one another and the cause of Christ sustained them. Newton did not take the path of many fellow ministers during the time, who seemed to have all but abandoned their families. Newton remained dedicated to Polly.

    They also endured much familial heartbreak. Mary was often gone taking care of her ailing parents and siblings. Also, though the couple never had their own children, they did adopt two of their nieces, Betsy Catlett and Eliza Cunningham. In 1774, they took in Betsy, who would outlive both the Newtons. Eliza came to the Newton’s when she was gravely ill at the age of 12. They took her in as her own until she sadly died in 1785.

    It would be five years later that Polly would succumb to breast cancer. Upon her death, Newton wrote:

    When I was sure she was gone, I took off her ring, according to her repeated injunction, and put it upon my own finger. I then kneeled down, with the servants who were in the room, and returned the Lord my unfeigned thanks for her deliverance and her peaceful dismission.

    How wonderful must be the moment after death! What a transition did she then experience! She was instantly freed from sin, and all its attendant sorrows, and, I trust, instantly admitted to join the heavenly choir. That moment was remarkable to me, likewise. It removed from me the chief object which made another day or hour of life, as to my own personal concern, desirable. At the same time, it set me free from a weight of painful feelings and anxieties, under which nothing short of a divine power could have so long supported me.[5]

    Newton was certainly grief-stricken, but it didn’t impact his ministry. He continued on in all of his ministry the next day. He even preached at Polly’s funeral. Many critiqued him for this, but his resolve here was connected to the entire pattern of their marriage. He loved Polly deeply. But he also understood that she was a gift to him from God. He held her in proper place and so he was able to hold her well.

    Their love story is a beautiful reminder of the depth of Christian love. But it’s also a picture of Christ’s love for the church. It motivates us to love others deeply but to keep our affections proper so we can love people well. This kind of love flows from Christ.

    Photo Credit: © Getty Images/carton_king

    [1] John Newton, Richard Cecil, The Works of the John Newton, vol. 1 (London: Hamilton, Adams & Co., 1824), 6.
    [2] John Newton, Richard Cecil, The Works of the John Newton, vol. 1 (London: Hamilton, Adams & Co., 1824), 6.
    [3] John Newton and Richard Cecil, The Works of John Newton, vol. 5 (London: Hamilton, Adams & Co., 1824), 394–395.
    [4] John Newton and Richard Cecil, The Works of John Newton, vol. 5 (London: Hamilton, Adams & Co., 1824), 564.
    [5] John Newton and Richard Cecil, The Works of John Newton, vol. 5 (London: Hamilton, Adams & Co., 1824), 621.

    Mike Leake is husband to Nikki and father to Isaiah and Hannah. He is also the lead pastor at Calvary of Neosho, MO. Mike is the author of Torn to Heal and Jesus Is All You Need. His writing home is http://mikeleake.net and you can connect with him on Twitter @mikeleake. Mike has a new writing project at Proverbs4Today.

    This article originally appeared on Christianity.com. For more faith-building resources, visit

    Christianity.com.

    [ad_2]

    Mike Leake

    Source link

  • CROCKPOT CHEESY POTATOES

    CROCKPOT CHEESY POTATOES

    [ad_1]

    These Crock Pot Cheesy Potatoes are so easy to make and always a hit. They require only a few ingredients and are a wonderful side dish!

    Crock Pot Cheesy PotatoesCrock Pot Cheesy Potatoes

    If you are a fan of potato side dishes, you will want to give this Mashed Potato Casserole a try! It’s easy to make and goes great with just about any meal!

    ❤️WHY WE LOVE THIS RECIPE

    We love the simplicity of this recipe! Anything we can just throw in the crock pot is a win-win! Plus, the flavor is wonderful; when you are busy cooking, anything that will cook on its own is a great dish.

    🍴KEY INGREDIENTS

    • Large potatoes
    • Cream of chicken soup
    • Butter
    • Sour cream
    • Garlic powder
    • Black pepper
    • Salt and pepper
    • Dried parsley flakes
    • Chopped onion
    • Cayenne
    • Shredded cheese

    🍽️HOW TO MAKE

    This recipe is very easy to make. Like most crock pot dishes, you just throw everything in and let it cook. Cutting up the potatoes is going to be the longest part of this process.

    COOKING STEPS

    Step 1
    Put all ingredients in crock pot and cook on low 4 to 6 hours or until potatoes are cooked. Stir potatoes every 2-3 hours to ensure they cook evenly.

    ⭐TIP

    If you are not a fan of canned condensed soups, you can always make your own. Here is our recipe on how to make your own.

    RECIPE VARIATIONS

    This is a versatile recipe and you can add whatever spices you like and the cheese your family loves too. We enjoy Mexican blend or sharp cheddar but this will be good with any cheese.

    You may also enjoy these other potato dishes:

    • Southern Fried Potatoes – These are a staple for a reason, they will never go out of style and you can eat them for breakfast, lunch, or dinner!
    • Old Fashioned Stewed Potatoes – This is a recipe your grandmother may have spoiled you with! Made with water and super simple, but so good!
    • Fried Potato Cakes – These are so good and make a wonderful appetizer or a great way to enjoy leftover mashed potatoes. We always make them after the holidays!
    Crock Pot Cheesy PotatoesCrock Pot Cheesy Potatoes

    SERVE THIS WITH

    • Brown Sugar Meatloaf – This is one of the best meatloaf recipes on the internet! Just read the comments!
    • Stuffed Green Peppers – One of our favorites and many others agree! Goes great with these potatoes, since they can cook while you make the peppers.
    • Salmon Patties – So easy to make, only a few ingredients and delicious!

    ❓FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

    What type of potatoes do you use?

    We just use russet potatoes, but you can use any kind. If you use smaller potatoes, like Yukon gold, they will cook faster.

    We are not a fan of sour cream, can you taste it?

    No, you can’t taste the sour cream.

    What size crock pot do you use?

    We make this in a 4 quart crock pot, but you can use whatever size it will fit in. If you put it in a much larger one, it may cook faster so watch the potatoes.

    STORING AND REHEATING

    We store in an air tight container and reheat in the microwave or back in the crock pot on low.

    SERVING SIZE

    This recipe makes around 8 servings.

    Crockpot Cheesy Potatoes

    Anne Walkup

    This easy recipe for cheesy potatoes will quickly become a family favorite. These potatoes come out creamy, cheesy and delicious!

    Prep Time 10 minutes

    Cook Time 6 hours

    Total Time 6 hours 10 minutes

    Course Dinner, Side Dish

    Cuisine American

    • 7 or 8 large potatoes peeled and diced
    • 1 10.5 ounce can cream of chicken soup (Could use any creamed soup you like)
    • 1/4 cup butter or 4 tablespoons melted
    • 1/2 cup sour cream
    • 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
    • 1/2 teaspoon black pepper
    • 1 teaspoon salt or to taste
    • 1 teaspoon dried parsley flakes
    • 1/4 cup green onion or just regular onion chopped
    • Pinch of cayenne
    • 1 cup Mexican style shredded cheese or cheese of your choice

    Keyword Crockpot Cheesy Potatoes

    Let us know by commenting below!

    Follow us on Pinterest!

    Are you reading our magazine?

    Join 1000’s of others and start a subscription today. Full of new recipes, inspiring stories, country living, and much more.

    © The Southern Lady Cooks photos and text – All rights reserved. No copying, posting on other sites, or other uses allowed without written permission of the copyright holder.

    [ad_2]

    Anne Walkup

    Source link

  • When Spouses Can’t Agree on a Church

    When Spouses Can’t Agree on a Church

    [ad_1]

    As a teenager in my local church, my stomach would churn every time I spotted a certain lady coming to church without her husband. She was wedded in our church in a beautiful, enviable ceremony. She and her groom were visibly in love, barely able to shift their gazes from each other the entire day. My friends and I were completely enthralled by the couple’s display of love. 

    A few years later, the lady was still attending our church but the husband had shifted to another. I felt crushed by the turn of events in their marriage. Like most teenagers, I was greatly intrigued by the subject of marriage. Among the things I envisioned in marriage was unity, and it broke my heart to see the couple divided on which church to attend.

    It’s not uncommon to find couples split down the middle on which church they should attend. One of them may, for instance, prefer a congregation inclined to liturgical worship while their partner may be sold out to charismatic worship. Couples may also differ along doctrinal lines where one partner may feel that the church preferred by the other is not doctrinally sound. How should couples proceed when pulled in opposite directions where church is concerned? 

    Here are six things to put to mind as you both ferret for a solution:

    1. Marriage Should Exude Unity

    The scriptures teach that after marriage, a man and his wife are no longer two individuals but one flesh. God then issues a warning—no one should separate those He has joined together. Unity is one of the distinctive marks of marriage. In fact, it can be said to be the foundation of marriage since the essence of marriage is leaving and cleaving. 

    And whilst two cannot walk together unless they are agreed, those in marriage have already decided to walk together. Seeing them walk separate ways when it comes to church attendance therefore goes against the grain. It’s like hearing a bird buzzing like a bee instead of chirping away. It’s simply not expected. 

    Paul referred to the Corinthian church as letters of recommendation written in his heart, to be known and read by all (2 Corinthians 3:2, ESV). Whether we realize it or not, people are scrutinizing our marriages. They yearn to see love, unity, respect, trust, godliness, fidelity, etc. They are rooting for our marriages, hoping and praying that we will weather every storm and come out triumphantly. 

    Besides that, God wants the light in our marriages to shine before men so that they will see our good works and glorify him in heaven (Mathew 5:16). Our marriages should be a pattern of good works. Failing to agree on a church does not bring glory to God and we should refrain from getting comfortable with such an arrangement. Furthermore, attending different churches gets very confusing for children as they get pulled in different directions. Do they attend mommy’s or daddy’s church? 

    2. Pray for Wisdom

    There is no confusion that godly wisdom cannot quell. God does not want His children to wobble around, drenched in confusion, unsure of which path to tread. He is the Good Shepherd who leads us in green pastures (Psalm 23). He sent His Son Jesus so that we could have life in abundance. He wants the best for us and our families and loves to see us thrive! James taught that if anyone lacks wisdom, they should ask God who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to them (James 1:5-6). 

    Wisdom is the ability to discern what is right and acceptable. The good news? God is generous with wisdom. If you and your spouse are finding it hard to agree on a church, seek God’s wisdom. Ask Him to lead you to the right church for your family. Remember that by wisdom a house is built, and through understanding, it is established (Proverbs 24:3).

    3. Settle on a Healthy Compromise

    For any marriage to succeed, spouses have to ditch selfishness and uphold their spouse’s needs above theirs. Philippians 2:3 implores us to do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit but in humility, to value others above ourselves. God designed marriage as a place where Christ’s relationship with the Church would be demonstrated. That’s why Paul instructed wives to submit to their husbands as to the Lord and husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church and died for her (Ephesians 5:22-28). 

    When both of you have different opinions regarding the church to join, it’s time for both of you to cede ground for the good of the marriage. In fact, don’t wait for your spouse to be the first to relinquish their control. Believers are called to outdo each other in showing honor. Be the first to baffle him/her with your humility.   

    This could mean that the wife decides to settle for the church her husband is interested in, as an act of submission. This could also mean that the husband goes along with the wife’s church preference as a demonstration of his sacrificial love for her. Remember, yielding to another person’s will is not a sign of weakness but of strength and power. Jesus taught that whoever desires to become great shall first be a servant (Matthew 20:16). The way up is down. 

    4. Be Creative

    A little creativity will go a long way in helping you and your spouse settle on a church with neither of you feeling too aggrieved. Pastor Jay of the Gospel Obsessed suggests that since almost all churches record their services, you can always listen to your favorite preacher later on in the week. So you can agree to attend the church your spouse favors and still tune in to your church of choice online. That sounds like a double blessing!

    Both of you can also look for a church that caters to both of your preferences. For example, you can get a church that combines both traditional and contemporary worship styles. 

    5. Honor God First

    What do you do if your spouse wants you to join a cult? Should you tag along for unity’s sake? As believers, our first allegiance is to God. We should not disobey God to please our spouses. In Acts 5, Peter and the other apostles were prohibited by the high priest and the Sadducees from teaching in the name of Jesus and spreading His doctrine. They didn’t mince their words on this matter. “We ought to obey God rather than men” (Acts 5:29).

    We too ought to obey God rather than our spouses. We have a right to differ when they implore us to be part of churches that dishonor God. We are first accountable to God before any human being. 

    6. Seek Godly Counsel

    A Christian counselor can help you and your spouse navigate this challenge. Christian counselors combine clinical practice approaches with religious or spiritual principles to help believers maneuver various life issues. You can also seek counsel from an older Christian couple that you trust. King Solomon observed that where there is no counsel, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors, there is safety (Proverbs 11:14).

    Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/People Images

    Keren Kanyago is a freelance writer and blogger at Parenting Spring. As a wife and mom, she uses her blog to weigh in on pertinent issues around parenting, marriage, and the Christian Faith. She holds a degree in mass communication with a specialty in print media. Follow her on Facebook and Instagram and/or shoot her an email at kerenkanyago@gmail.com.

    [ad_2]

    Keren Kanyago

    Source link

  • What to Do with Your Cheating Husband

    What to Do with Your Cheating Husband

    [ad_1]

    Disclaimer: This isn’t therapy, and Dr. Audrey’s advice is for the general audience, meaning it may not always work for everyone. 

    Currently separated from my husband. I have intentions on remaining faithful and trying to work on our marriage. He has picked back up on bad habits, drinking, smoking weed, taking mushrooms, porn and sleeping around and staying in houses with other women. I’m hurt because I prayed and sought The Lord before getting married. . . Since knowing that he has been with other women, I’m ready to throw in towel, but it hurts because I love him and just want him to love me back. I’ve isolated myself and no one to really talk to this about. My family who are not saved always tell me I have problems and should not have married. His parents are believers but don’t encourage him to do what’s right in the sight of God. I’m very broken, can’t sleep without having bad dreams that me and my husband are done. I for sure thought God called us to be together. What should I do? We have 2 very young children together as well who ask about their father daily. – AH

    I’m doubly sorry because neither your family nor his has supplied the help you need. This lack of support makes your agony even harder to bear.

    Given all you’ve shared, I have three recommendations.

    1. Find a Church 

    Nobody can survive stressful times by fighting solo. This is particularly true when young children are in the picture, like in your situation. That’s why finding a Bible-believing church needs to be one of your top priorities. Seek a spiritual house where you can feel safe enough to join.

    See the word “enough” in the last sentence? I’m borrowing this principle from a famed British psychoanalyst, D. W. Winnicott. He coined the term of being a “good enough” mother. She doesn’t perfectly attune to her baby’s needs but is doing a good enough job, leaving the baby with only small amounts of frustration.

    This concept is helpful because, as I’m sure you know, you can search through all denominations and still, you won’t find a perfect church. Maybe the music is too contemporary or the distance makes it daunting to go regularly. But if that place preaches the Bible and the people there love the Lord then tolerate small frustrations and get planted there.

    Why?

    Because our faith in God—in His goodness, love, and power to see us through—needs regular boosters, but especially during hard times. Faith comes by hearing the Word (Romans 10:17). If ever there’s a time for you not to forsake the assembling of ourselves (Hebrews 10:25), it’s now, when you’re facing a trial. So, bulk up on sermons and the Word of God.

    Research also shows churchgoers tend to fare better in physical and mental health. Improved mental health might have something to do with the opportunity churchgoing creates in socializing with like-minded individuals. After all, a friend loves at all times (Proverbs 17:17); so, when you’re parched for love, hang around friends.

    Isn’t it interesting this Proverb doesn’t say a spouse loves at all times? It’s sad when our own spouse treats us as though we’re as valuable as a used tissue. But a true friend wouldn’t mind babysitting for you or listening to your distress.

    2. Trust God’s Grace

    Should you stay married when your spouse hasn’t respected your vows?

    If you believe God joined the two of you in marriage, you should fight for your relationship. “Let no one split apart what God has joined together” (Mark 10:9, NLT).

    But staying married is hard when your husband is gallivanting around. For one thing, unless he’s thoroughly repentant, it’s unwise to trust him with your heart.

    This is why you need to hear, for yourself, what the Almighty decrees about your situation. His view is what matters. Take His word over your family’s or even your husband’s behavior.

    Especially because you can always rely on God’s grace to do His ways. 

    For instance, if He instructs you to stay the course, He will also grant you the grace and supernatural love for your husband as you bear this unpleasant situation. (“Love bears all things,” Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 13:7.) 

    If you feel God is leading you this way, ask for specific prayer points to pray for your husband to come to his senses. Pray for you too, so you can “stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand” (Ephesians 6:13) as you continue to navigate through the hardship.

    One last word on this thread.

    If God called you to remain separated (at least for now), you could trust Him to deal with your man during the break. But brace yourself. Things could grow gloomier in the meantime. Whatever happens, though, you can trust Him to keep working on your husband.

    Discerning what God says is best done when you shut out the world. Even with young kids to care for, there are things you can do to plan a private retreat. Read the first bullet point in this article for helpful tips.

    3. IFS Therapy 

    Seeking God’s heart on the matter might be crucial, but teasing out His voice from our own can be complicated. Many have made the mistake and attributed to God what actually arose from their own souls. 

    I include myself in that number.

    This is why I also recommend Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy. This unique therapy modality recognizes the many inner voices we hear as coming from different parts of our souls. Practicing IFS helps us distinguish these voices from the Almighty’s.

    But let me back up and explain. We’re made up of spirit, soul, and body (1 Thessalonians 5:23). And just as our body consists of many parts, the same goes for our soul.

    To determine whether you’ve heard from parts of your soul, here is a quick test. Have you noticed these inner reactions following your husband’s misbehavior? 

    How could he do this?

    What should I do? File for divorce? 

    I thought God wanted us to be together. Shouldn’t we stick it out? But how, when my husband doesn’t give a flipping care?

    What should I tell the kids when they ask about their dad again?

    If you resonate with any of the above, that’s because you’ve heard some of your parts expressing themselves. 

    Validate them. Say something like: “I hear you. Thanks for sharing your opinion candidly with me. I don’t have all the answers, but God will help us get through this storm.” 

    Listening to our parts calms them down. 

    This is what it means to be still and know that He is God (Psalm 46:10). The stillness of your soul makes hearing God’s voice easier to do.

    So, after spending time listening to your parts and their concerns about your husband’s hurtful behavior, invite God into the conversation. Listen to the Lord. The One who is close to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18) will say something soothing to you, while also steering you to the right path.

    It’s easier for someone who’s trained in the model to guide you with IFS. That’s why I recommend investing in your own emotional welfare by hiring an IFS therapist. Head to the IFS Institute website to find an IFS therapist near you.

    But if you don’t feel comfortable with IFS, that’s fine. Find a competent therapist who is clinically skilled and won’t undermine your worldview. (Some therapists, on hearing about your husband’s indiscretions, might quickly advise you to leave him—without hearing the other parts of you that might want to stay.) 

    If you want a therapist who shares your faith, check out Focus on the Family for a list of Christian therapists.

    May God’s will be done in your life—as well as your husband’s—as it is in heaven (Matthew 6:10).

    Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Engin Akyurt

    Audrey Davidheiser, PhD is a California licensed psychologist, certified Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapist, and IFSI-approved clinical consultant. After founding and directing a counseling center for the Los Angeles Dream Center, she now devotes her practice to survivors of trauma—including spiritual abuse. If you need her advice, visit her on www.aimforbreakthrough.com and Instagram @DrAudreyD.

    [ad_2]

    Dr. Audrey Davidheiser

    Source link

  • A Recipe for Fuki Buds: Butterburs Herald the Coming of Spring

    A Recipe for Fuki Buds: Butterburs Herald the Coming of Spring

    [ad_1]

    Fuki is the (transliterated) Japanese name for the perennial plant butterbur. In Japan, fuki no to, the aromatic buds of butterbur, are a delicacy and a herald of spring, which is still weeks away when they emerge from the cold ground. Butterburs belong to the genus Petasites, and North America is home to a cold-hardy native species as well as introduced butterburs, which are valued as ornamentals in gardens. Their parasol-wide leaves are awe-inspiring, as they broaden in summer. The midribs of fuki leaves are also eaten in Japan, and were a traditional food for Native Americans. All edible parts of the plant are specially treated before consumption. Fuki comes with caveats.

    Celebrate winter’s demise with a bite of fuki tempura or miso, and learn more about this plant-of-many-names.

    Photography by Marie Viljoen.

    Above: Japanese butterbur, Petasites japonicus.

    Fuki, butterbur, sweet coltsfoot, Arctic coltsfoot, Arctic butterbur, pestilence wort. These common names are used close to interchangeably, depending on the person, place, species, and variety of Petasites. Japanese butterbur is Petasites japonicus, and its chartreuse-shaded buds break ground many weeks before the vernal equinox in the Northeast, where it is mildly invasive. Its buds appear when cornelian cherry, hellebores, fragrant honeysuckle, and witch hazel bloom. It is native to East Asia and is hardy from USDA zones 5-9. While Japanese butterbur is known as a good plant for problem places, this has led unintentionally to some environmental issues: Petasites in general can be aggressive colonizers and have a high tolerance for moist spots. Butterburs spread via creeping rhizomes, and their wide, leafy canopies create a super-shade where other plants cannot grow.

    [galley_caption]Above: Artist Justice Wolf of Little Creek Ink, standing beneath mature fuki leaves.[/galley_caption]

    The densely budded but diminutive flower buds of Japanese butterbur give way to leaves that are otherworldly in scale, like a botanical throwback to dinosaur times. A mature plant can stand over six feet tall, with foliage that instantly shrinks the human standing beneath the statuesque stems.

    Above: Petasites hybridus has burgundy buds.

    A burgundy-flowered butterbur, Petasites hybridus, is native to Europe and parts of Asia. It enjoys a common name (among many others) that inadvertently captures two sides of a botanical argument: Pestilence wort. You could read that as referring to an environmental threat, or to its extensive use as a folk medicine. (It has been studied in the treatment of migraines.) Of these two species, Japanese butterbur is considered more problematic in terms of habitat-alteration.

    In British Columbia, forager Matt McAllister collects the buds of Petasites frigidus for market.

    This native North American butterbur comprises four different varieties, occurring from northern California through the Pacific Northwest, Canada and Alaska, into the Arctic, and across the continent, to the Atlantic coast. It, too, likes wet growing conditions (stream banks, ditches, low ground), and has a long history of use as food by Native Americans nations (Moerman, 1998), who collected buds, leaf petioles (stalks), and young leaves.

    Above: A Hudson Valley collection of early, mostly invasive, spring edibles, including Japanese butterbur.

    [ad_2]

    Source link

  • PECAN UPSIDE-DOWN CAKE

    PECAN UPSIDE-DOWN CAKE

    [ad_1]

    If you love pecans, brown sugar and a delicious moist cake you need to give this pecan upside down cake a try! It’s so good!!

    Pecan Upside Down Cake

    If you love this cake, you will also love the classic Pineapple Upside-Down Cake! It’s been a favorite for many years.

    ❤️WHY WE LOVE THIS RECIPE

    We love that this cake is made in a 9 inch cake pan, it’s the perfect size for a small gathering. it’s also super easy to make and only a few ingredients. It’s made with a baking mix and we love how moist this cake is.

    🍴KEY INGREDIENTS

    • Topping:
    • Butter
    • Brown sugar
    • Pecan pieces
    • Ingredients for Cake:
    • Baking mix (Bisquick, Jiffy Baking Mix or make your baking mix with our recipe)
    • White granulated sugar
    • Buttermilk
    • Egg
    • Vanilla extract

    SWAPS

    You can use milk in this recipe but we prefer buttermilk because of the added fat content, and it makes the cake very moist.

    🍽️HOW TO MAKE

    This cake is easy to make and one your family will love! Easy to mix up and you don’t even have to get out your mixer.

    COOKING STEPS

    Step 1
    Melt butter in oven in a 9 inch round cake pan.  Stir brown sugar into melted butter in pan.  Arrange pecans over butter and brown sugar.  

    Step 2
    Whisk together the baking mix and white sugar in a mixing bowl.  Add buttermilk, egg and vanilla extract.  Stir well with a spoon.  Spread over the pecans.  

    Step 3
    Bake in a preheated 350 degree oven for 35 to 40 minutes or until center tests done when stuck with a fork or toothpick. 

    Step 4
    Remove from oven and let sit for 10 minutes to cool before taking out of pan.  Makes 1 nine inch round cake. 4-6 servings.

    Pecan Upside Down CakePecan Upside Down Cake

    ⭐TIP

    We think this cake is even better the next day so you can easily make it a day in advance. It’s so good with a cup of coffee. Perfect for brunch!

    OTHER SMALL CAKES

    • Peach Upside Down Cake – This dessert is made with canned peaches and a refreshing treat.
    • Chocolate Wacky Cake – This cake is made in a 9X9 and perfect for a small gathering. It also has no eggs, butter or milk. It’s sometimes called depression cake.
    • Busy Day Cake – Another snack size cake that anyone will love. Great with coffee!

    ❓FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

    Can I make this in a 10 inch cast iron?

    Yes, but it will cook quicker and not be as thick.

    STORING

    We store this in an airtight container and it keeps for a few days.

    SERVING SIZE

    This cake is about 8 slices, we consider that about 4 servings.

    Pecan Upside-Down Cake

    Anne Walkup

    This Pecan Upside Down Cake is so easy to make and absolutely delicious! You don’t even need to get out your mixer for this one! If you love pecans and brown sugar this simple dessert is for you.

    Prep Time 10 minutes

    Cook Time 35 minutes

    Total Time 45 minutes

    Course Cake, Dessert

    Cuisine American

    Topping:

    • 4 tablespoons butter
    • 1/2 cup brown sugar
    • 1 cup pecan pieces

    Ingredients for Cake:

    • 1 1/3 cups baking mix Bisquick, Jiffy Baking Mix
    • 3/4 cup white granulated sugar
    • 3/4 cup buttermilk
    • 1 egg
    • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

    • Melt butter in oven in a 9 inch round cake pan. Stir brown sugar into melted butter in pan. Arrange pecans over butter and brown sugar. Whisk together the baking mix and white sugar in a mixing bowl. Add buttermilk, egg and vanilla extract. Stir well with a spoon. Spread over the pecans.

    • Bake in a preheated 350 degree oven for 35 to 40 minutes or until center tests done when stuck with a fork or toothpick. Remove from oven and let sit for 10 minutes to cool before taking out of pan. Makes 1 nine inch round cake.

    Keyword Pecan Upside-Down Cake

    Let us know by commenting below!

    Follow us on Pinterest!

    Are you reading our magazine?

    Join 1000’s of others and start a subscription today. Full of new recipes, inspiring stories, country living, and much more.

    © The Southern Lady Cooks photos and text – All rights reserved. No copying, posting on other sites, or other uses allowed without written permission of the copyright holder.

    [ad_2]

    Anne Walkup

    Source link

  • Six Prayers for Estranged Family Members

    Six Prayers for Estranged Family Members

    [ad_1]

    Whether it’s due to a tragic event or years of pent-up hurt and unforgiveness, many of us have family members who are estranged from one another. That sibling who hasn’t spoken to you in years. That parent you haven’t wanted to reach out to. That uncle you need to avoid for your own health. 

    This can be a wrestle, emotionally and spiritually. It hurts when family members stop speaking to one another. We all want the happy family dreams we see on our screens. We all want unity and family memories, family celebrations, etc. But so often, reality does not quite measure up to the fantasy. 

    This is even more complicated when your family members begin to feel like enemies when they are out to slander you or cut you off relationally. This brings up so much heartache and pain. 

    While boundaries with those toxic family members are healthy and good, one way we can continue to love our estranged family members while remaining separated from them is through prayer.

    But let’s be honest – when family-drama emotions are heightened, or anger is ignited when it all feels deeply unfair and hurtful – you might not know how to pray. This is when we can turn to the scriptures to find wisdom. 

    Psalm 41, in fact, a song by King David, was written about a season when David’s enemies were rising against him. He cries out to God for comfort in his distress and speaks honestly and openly about the pain of being attacked by a close community.  Though he was not necessarily writing about estranged family members, it’s a very relatable passage of scripture. 

    Here are six ways to pray for your estranged family members from Psalm 41. 

    1. God, bless my family member and their loved ones. Deliver them when they are in trouble. God, protect and preserve them; count them among the blessed. 

    “Blessed are those who have regard for the weak; the Lord delivers them in their times of trouble. The Lord protects and preserves them—they are counted among the blessed in the land…”- Psalm 41: 1, 2

    2. Lord, sustain them when they are sick, restore them when they are ill. 
    “The Lord sustains them on their sickbeds and restores them from their bed of illness. – Psalm 41: 3 

    3. Jesus, have mercy on us both and stop any false accusations or slander that is destroying our relationship. 
    “I said, “Have mercy on me, Lord; heal me, for I have sinned against you.  My enemies say of me in malice, “When will he die and his name perish?” When one of them comes to see me, he speaks falsely while his heart gathers slander;
    then he goes out and spreads it around. – Psalm 41: 4-6

    4. God, I am deeply sad and angry that they have turned against me. Heal my heart and theirs. Bring our relationship to full restoration if that is your will. 
    “Even my close friend, someone I trusted, one who shared my bread, has turned[ against me. But may you have mercy on me, Lord; raise me up, that I may repay them. – Psalm 41: 9,10

    5. In the meantime, the Spirit of God transforms them (and me) into people of integrity. Uphold and set us all in your presence forever, even though we are not currently in each other’s presence. 
    “Because of my integrity you uphold me and set me in your presence forever.”- Psalm 41: 12

    6. I praise you, oh God, your love is everlasting, even when human love fails.
    “Praise be to the Lord, the God of Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. Amen and Amen.” – Psalm 41: 13

    What you’ll be surprised to discover, as you pray this Psalm over your estranged family member(s), is this – though the relationship might not change or be reconciled, your heart will soften and be transformed. 

    God will meet you in the frustration of it all and invite you into a newer, deeper family relationship with him. 

    Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/Pheelings Media

    Aubrey Sampson is a pastor, author, speaker, and cohost of The Common Good on AM1160 in Chicago. You can preorder her upcoming children’s book, Big Feeling Days: A Book About Hard Things, Heavy Emotions, and Jesus’ Love, and find and follow her @aubsamp on Instagram. Go to aubreysampson.com for more. 

    This article originally appeared on Christianity.com. For more faith-building resources, visit

    Christianity.com. Christianity.com

    [ad_2]

    Aubrey Sampson

    Source link

  • Summery Exotic Cocktails For The Last Of Winter

    Summery Exotic Cocktails For The Last Of Winter

    [ad_1]

    Spring is in sight, but winter still has a hold on the weather – here are some tropical cocktails to give you the summertime feel

    Winter is done in three weeks, but it isn’t done with us yet. Coats, sleet, and long days are still here.  But hope is around the corner, March and April are often the busiest months of the year, surprisingly for gyms. People begin to feel summer approaching and want to start getting their bodies swimsuit-ready.  The dreams of tropical (or at least sunny) destinations are in people’s mind as they look out the window.  To help, here are some summery exotic cocktail for the last of winter.

    Related: California or New York, Which Has The Biggest Marijuana Mess

    Daiquiri

    Made famous by Hemingway, the Daiquiri is frozen fun choice of summer time drinks!  It was either invented in 1902 by an American mining engineer named Jennings CoxWilliam A. Chanler in Cuba or a US congressman who purchased the Cuban iron mines and introduced it to New York.

    • 4 ounces white rum
    • 2 ounces lime juice, freshly squeezed
    • 2 ounces simple syrup
    • Garnish: 2 lime wheels

    Create

    1. Add all ingredients into a blender with a cup and a half of ice.

    2. Pulse until mixed.

    3. Divide between two glasses and garnish each with a lime wheel.

    Tequila Sunrise

    Created by Bobby Lozoff and Billy Rice in the early 1970s while  working as young bartenders in Sausalito. They served the drink to The Rolling Stones’s Mick Jagger at the start of their 1972 American.  Jagger had one, loved, and he and the band order them throughout the tour.  He even dubbing the tour the “cocaine and tequila sunrise tour”.

    • 2 ounces blanco tequila
    • 4 ounces orange juice, freshly squeezed
    • 1/4 ounce grenadine
    • Garnish: orange slice
    • Garnish: cherry

    Create

    1. Add the tequila and then the orange juice to a chilled tall highball glass filled with ice.

    2. Top with the grenadine, which will sink to the bottom of the glass, creating a layered effect.

    3. Garnish with an orange slice and a cherry.

    RELATED: Science Says Medical Marijuana Improves Quality Of Life

    Barracuda

    Developed in the late 50s by the bartender Benito Cuppari while he was working SS Michelangelo cruise ship, it is named after the Barracuda Beach Club in Portico.  It was initially served in a pineapple shell.

    Ingredients

    • ⅔ Part Galliano
    • ⅓ Part Grenadine
    • ⅔ Part Light Rum
    • ⅓ Part Lime Juice
    • ⅔ Part Pineapple Juice
    • Champagne

    Create

    • Fill a chilled highball glass with ice cubes.
    • Add galliano, grenadine, light rum, lime juice and pineapple juice.
    • Top up with champagne.

    OR

    • Shake Galliano, grenadine, light rum, lime juice and pineapple juice well.
    • Pour in a champagne coupe.
    • Top with champagne

    While the temperatures may be low outside, warm your insides with these summery exotic cocktails for the winter.

    [ad_2]

    Sarah Johns

    Source link

  • 5 Things Never to Say to Your Grandchildren

    5 Things Never to Say to Your Grandchildren

    [ad_1]

    Grandparents are supposed to be kid experts. We’ve raised our own children and by now should be seasoned and mellowed-out enough to roll with the ups and downs of our grandkids’ lives. Those of us with new grandbabies harbor visions of becoming the perfect, loved-more-than-anybody-else Mimi, or Lolli, or Pops, or whatever cute name we’ve decided to be called.

    Then the pre-teen and teen years come along and our bubble bursts. Oh, our grandchildren still love us bunches—and we still can’t believe the overwhelming love we hold for them—but their struggling hormones make them difficult to live with at home and even at our house.

    We want to carry on rational, adult conversations with them, yet sometimes struggle with what to say. And sometimes we fail to say the right things and we know it.

    To help identify quagmires, what types of conversations should we definitely avoid?

    1. Insulting words about their parents

    Lighthearted stories about the antics and pranks of your own children can be entertaining for your grandchildren. These are fine, and even lend a sense of pride at being old enough to hear them along with learning family lore. But if you still feel unhappy or sad about the behavior of one of your grandchild’s parents, she doesn’t need to know—unless she expresses the same emotion first in a conversation.

    Even then, she needs your guidance to navigate toward an effective and positive way of dealing with her feelings. It’s not your place to confide in your grandchildren about the failures of their parents.

    Another sticky area is when our grandchild’s parents are divorced. No matter how the custody is arranged, and no matter how dysfunctional we might think our kid’s ex-spouse is, the child does not need to hear it from us. They love Mom and Dad and are trying to work out their own thoughts.

    We don’t have to praise that parent, but it’s important to speak carefully when the subject comes up. In our case, we simply choose to keep busy with other topics—there is plenty of activity in our grandson’s life to talk about. When he mentions the other parent, we listen, comment in a way that lets him know we heard and value his words, and then move on to another subject.

    2. Stories about how much worse you had it as a kid

    You know how these stories go. “I had to walk two miles in the snow to school every day—uphill both ways!” Or, “We never got to wear pants to school, even though I walked three blocks to the bus stop in sub-freezing weather.” And then there is this one, “We only had one family car, and everybody shared it. I never had my own car.” Actually, the last two examples were from my personal experience.

    While it might be okay to tell these stories, they should never be used to make a child feel as if she is taking things for granted or like her feelings aren’t valid. Maybe she is being ungrateful but helping her identify her blessings might be a better way to approach the subject.

    While you may think you had a really tough life as a young person, your difficulties didn’t seem any worse to you than your grandkids’ do to them. Yes, they have different problems, but that doesn’t make theirs less painful.

    The grandparent who constantly tells stories to “one-up” their grandchild runs the risk of never being taken seriously, or worse, being viewed as an old, out-of-touch person who doesn’t understand modern life—and is therefore irrelevant.

    3. Negative bias about the younger generation

    I used to hear this from an elderly aunt every time our family visited her. She was convinced the reason for the increased crime rate in her city—and the unemployment rate, and every other social ill—was teenagers and their bad behavior.

    Admittedly, teen gangs were becoming a problem at that time, but the reasons for the rise in gang activity were, and still are, complex. All her problems were not due to teenagers!

    A doomsday view of society is not only unhelpful but can frighten our grandchildren. Placing blame on a particular generation merely perpetuates stereotypes. It doesn’t solve any problems. Do we have issues facing us today that were unheard of in our youth? Certainly. This is always going to be true, regardless of the decade.

    Unfortunately, a downward spiral of society is the natural trend of mankind apart from the intervention of God. So, if there is any blame, maybe we should look at ourselves to see how often we pray for a spiritual awakening, and how open we are to the Holy Spirit working in our lives.

    A great conversation to have with our grandchildren might be about finding ways to make a difference in their world. Do you know of any kids who are doing something special? Can you brainstorm with your grandkids possible options for them?

    Maybe offer to take the oldest on a mission trip with you to work with children in a third-world country. Such an experience can change a teenager’s life and possibly their career choice. And it can make the problems at home seem less daunting for both of you.

    I know of one family whose son became interested in local politics. He began writing letters to the editor of the newspaper, and eventually wrote articles they printed. He’s in college now preparing for a future in policy making. He was encouraged by his parents and grandparents to help change what he saw as problems.

    I would have benefitted from my aunt’s concerns if she had encouraged me to volunteer serving meals at a homeless ministry instead of listening to her berate those homeless people for daring to sleep on her street.

    4. Condemning all electronics and social media as evil

    Different families allow differing amounts and types of screen time for their children. It’s important that as grandparents, we don’t criticize the rules our grandkids have at home. We might think they spend too much time on their phones at home, and they might bring them to our house. But we can set our own rules.

    Banning cell phones from the dinner table and limiting other screen time is reasonable, and can be discussed without condemning the devices.

    Refusing to acknowledge the reality a child lives in, and limiting conversation about it to negative comments, only serves to drive him away. He won’t want to go to Nanny and Papa’s house if all they do is nag him about putting away his phone.

    There are plenty of activities in which to engage with your grandchildren that keep them moving and thinking and talking. Be creative in discovering things you can do together. This will naturally lead to less screen time.

    But if a child wants to talk about a video game she plays, make an effort to educate yourself about that game so you can talk intelligently about it. And when a rainy day comes along, enjoy a movie or play a video game together. You can even text silly memes across the room to each other.

    Relax, Grandma. The world won’t end if you join Snapchat with your grandchildren. It might even help you keep up with their lives.

    5. Any comment that degrades their worth 

    Sometimes, the birth of a grandchild doesn’t happen in happy circumstances. Many different issues might be the reason, but the result is a child who bears no responsibility for any of them. And any associated drama can spill over onto this precious one. So let’s be conscious of our words so we don’t add to it.

    The child might act out his frustrations in behavior that grabs our attention. This does make our lives more difficult. But we need to remember that bad behavior does not equal a bad child.  Separating the behavior from our emotions helps us deal with it appropriately. Then we can express our love more easily—because unconditional love is what we as grandparents need to offer.

    Many grandparents even gain custody of their grandkids in order to give them the best chance at a hopeful future. If this is you, please know you are my heroes. But your stress level may be extremely high. That’s when it’s easy to let it slip just how hard life is because of the child.

    And we all know that pre-teen and teenage kids are simply a pain sometimes because of their tumultuous hormones and chaotic social lives. Life is more challenging with these kids than with younger ones.

    However, these years also present opportunities for fun along with meaningful experiences. Attending any event your grandchild participates in means more to them than they may ever express. And some of the best conversations that build lasting relationships and trust can happen late at night when your grandchild sleeps over.

    These categories are all negative in tone, and that’s why we should avoid them. While we shouldn’t shy away from difficult subjects, we need to keep our tone positive.

    Every topic can have an upside, and we need to help our grandkids find it. They are bombarded daily with negativity, but we can point them toward the bright view.

    After all, Philippians 4:8 tells us to think pure, noble, lovely, and virtuous thoughts. Surely that means to talk in the same manner—to everyone, not just our grandchildren.

    Kathryn Graves, author of the book Fashioned by God, is a style expert, fashion coach, and Premier Designs jewelry consultant. She is also a pastor’s wife and Bible teacher. Kathryn helps women discover the source of real beauty in Jesus, freeing them to gain confidence in their personal styles. She is Mimi to three grandsons, and loves to play with color, both in fashion and interior design, and painting with pastels.

    Photo courtesy: ©GettyImages/PeopleImages

    [ad_2]

    Kathryn Graves

    Source link

  • What Is Sleep Divorce and Is it Biblical?

    What Is Sleep Divorce and Is it Biblical?

    [ad_1]

    Many married American couples envision their marriage bed as a sacred space. It is a place where you can dependably reconnect at the end of the day.

    If it’s not with some conversation, it is just by being snuggled up in the same cozy space as you both drift off to sleep. It’s a place you commit to returning to together no matter how the day went.

    For many, leaving the bed to sleep elsewhere can be a sign of anger, separation, and can undermine your feeling of connectivity in your relationship. Sleeping apart from one another can be seen as the first step taken away from one another when your marriage is facing tension.

    But sometimes, couples just have to because of their life situations.

    Why do we see a growing number of couples opting to sleep in separate beds and sometimes also opting to sleep in separate rooms? According to a 2017 survey from the National Sleep Foundation, almost one in four married couples sleep in separate beds.

    Is sleeping in separate spaces a sign of a relational break or just a pragmatic decision for more individual comfort? Let’s explore the potential consequences of this growing trend.

    What Is Sleep Divorce?

    While the term sleep divorce sounds a little dramatic, the reality is that the term is just referring to a decision some couples make to sleep in separate spaces for the sake of better rest.

    While the trend is growing in popularity now, it is not a new idea. As recent as the 1960’s couples sleeping in separate beds or places was fairly common.

    Over the past 50 plus years sleeping in the same bed became the norm for married couples but researchers are finding that up to 25% of married couples are choosing different arrangements.

    Why Do Couples Choose to Sleep Divorce?

    Sleep divorce may be prompted due to a couple’s differering schedule or inability to rest well in the same bed with your spouse.

    I know firsthand that there are seasons where separated sleep is necessary due to circumstances outside potential marital conflict.

    When we brought each of our babies home there were times when we had to sleep separately in order to facilitate better sleep for each other. I would take the first part of the night with the baby and then sometime in the early hours, my husband would come back upstairs to our room to take the baby downstairs to rest so I had at least 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

    That was a gracious gift as my Momma body could not fully rest with our loud grunting little nuggets right beside me.

    Some couples may be in a situation where they work opposite schedules. This can make sleeping at the same time in the same bed impossible.

    Many others report factors such as loud snoring, disagreements about lighting, temperature preferences, and other disagreements about comfortable sleeping preferences have led them to opt for separate beds and/or separate rooms.

    Couples select to separate at night for a variety of reasons ranging from practical concerns such as opposite schedules; to those who separate because they cannot agree to be in the same space together any longer.

    Is Sleep Divorce Biblical?

    Sleeping arrangements are mostly a cultural construct and the ways we have chosen to sleep in our homes have changed tremendously over the years due to a necessity or cultural norms of the time.

    The Bible doesn’t offer specific instructions on things like where we should sleep when we are married but it does give us a lot of other advice for our marriages that we can draw on to help us navigate these sorts of decisions.

    Ephesians 5 outlines many principles that can guide us in our marriages. It advises that we keep away from any sexual immorality, that we show each other love and respect, that we cherish one another, and that we serve each other. Let these be the standards that you judge your decisions by.

    All of our decisions should be born of a desire to love one another as Christ would.

    That means if sleeping together, even if it means less than stellar sleep, can be important to showing one another love. On the other hand, giving each other the freedom to rest without interruption can be an amazing gift of service and love to your spouse (particularly if you have a newborn).

    Let love and open communication guide you and you can’t go wrong.

    Before You Decide, Check Your Motives

    Is choosing to opt for a so-called “sleep divorce” bad for your marriage?

    Honestly, this is a hard question to answer because relationship and family circumstances vary so greatly!

    Many couples are making these kinds of choices for purely practical reasons such as taking turns tending to a newborn or working opposite shifts, while for others the decision to separate at night may be a worrisome signal that things are decaying in your relationship. 

    Determining the line between “I need to sleep alone for the sake of getting better rest” and “I don’t want to be in the same space as you” can get fuzzy.

    When dealing with circumstances that lead to the need to rest separately, clear communication and intentional times of connection have to be even more of a priority because you are missing out on a built-in time of shared space that a common bed allows for. 

    Sophie Jacobi-Parisi, a New York attorney at Warshaw Burstein, who practices matrimonial and family law, said that “couples that choose to sleep separately but don’t have a conversation around why they are making the change, it can be another step in the path toward divorce.”

    She makes the point that there can be many practical reasons as to why separate sleeping arrangements may be beneficial but if we are not clear in our communication with one another as to why we are making these types of decisions this can be one step closer to separation or divorce.

    The bottom line is that the decision to sleep separately is one that should not be taken lightly.

    If there is a real need for this arrangement, communication with one another surrounding this decision is very important to make sure that it is not a choice to step away from your commitment to your marriage.

    Every step we take away from our spouses, be it physically or emotionally, has the potential for negative long-term consequences. Wisdom invites us to weigh these types of decisions carefully.

    How to Keep a Healthy Marriage While Sleeping Separately

    If you are in a season of life where it feels impossible or disruptive to each other’s rest to sleep in the same bed there are a few ways to make sure you get through this season well.

    1. Identify the sleep issue and determine the best way to remedy it.

    For example, if opposite schedules mean you can’t go to bed together, then identify ways you are going to take time to rest together. There is something special about spending time resting together.

    While many think best sleep comes alone, there is research that shows that sharing a bed actually leads to better sleep. Potential benefits include falling to sleep faster, lowered blood pressure, a boosted immune system, helps curb anxiety, and even can slow down aging!

    If you are trading off dealing with children, one suggestion would be to do this switch during the week but reserve the weekends to still sleep in the same bed together. Another idea is to spend time together in bed catching up and snuggling before separating to your posts to get some rest.

    If separating is due to snoring, a health concern, or another issue, make sure you are thorough in discussing how to make sure you both know that the decision to sleep separately is not a decision to live separately.

    While it is easy to see the practical need for rest it is important to care and nurture each other’s feelings.

    Find ways to express your desire to remain near one another in life even if your circumstances prohibit being together in the night hours.

    2. Revisit your sleep arrangements frequently.

    No decision like this should be permanent. Just because something works well or is necessary for one season does not mean it is good for all seasons.

    Choosing to come back together to the same bed, even if it means lost sleep, is 100% worth it if it is going to bring your marriage closer together again.

    We sacrifice sleep for so many other causes: our children, video games, binge-watching TV, and even work. It is reasonable to expect to have to sacrifice some sleep for the sake of your marriage.

    Be wary of a temporary season of sleep separation becoming permanent. This could be a sign of a growing disconnect in your relationship.

    Once that baby is sleeping then you should return to sleeping in your same bed or at least should be talking about what new arrangement would work best for both of you.

    When your situation changes, it is important not to ignore the conversation around sleep arrangements. This can lead to resentment and false assumptions being made by each of you.

    3. Be mindful of how your sex life is affected by your sleep arrangements.

    One very practical reason to sleep in the same bed is that you are in the same place at the same time alone, giving you the chance to be intimate with one another.

    If I just fall asleep on the couch before going to bed, there is a much lower chance I am going to be up for getting intimate with my husband. If you are parents, practically you need the late hours of the night to be able to have the privacy required to have intercourse.

    Separate beds or separate rooms can become barriers to having access to one another sexually.

    This of course does not have to be the case. If you are mindful of each other’s needs and make it a point to be available to one another at other times of the day or are willing to travel across beds or even rooms to be intimate, then it is possible to keep a thriving sex life under this arrangement.

    Nonetheless, we know that a sexless marriage can be one factor that leads to divorce. Keep tabs on if your sleeping arrangement is affecting your sex life is a good way to determine if something is amiss in your relationship.

    Loving your spouse well often means sacrifice.

    Depending on your circumstances that sacrifice may look like buying ear plugs so you can remain close in the night to your chainsaw snoring spouse. It can also look like giving up your side of the bed so your baby and Momma have a safe space to rest together during those harrowing early months of life.

    If we want our marriages to thrive we have to be careful to be taking steps closer to one another, showing each other love and consideration in our every decision.

    Let that be your guide on how you navigate rest as you share your lives with one another.

    Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Prostock-Studio

    Amanda Idleman is a writer whose passion is to encourage others to live joyfully. She writes devotions for My Daily Bible Verse Devotional and Podcast, Crosswalk Couples Devotional, the Daily Devotional App, she has work published with Her View from Home, on the MOPS Blog, and is a regular contributor for Crosswalk.com. She has most recently published a devotional, Comfort: A 30 Day Devotional Exploring God’s Heart of Love for Mommas. You can find out more about Amanda on her Facebook Page or follow her on Instagram.

    [ad_2]

    Amanda Idleman

    Source link

  • Mean Girls Have Been Around for a Long Time

    Mean Girls Have Been Around for a Long Time

    [ad_1]

    I saw the trailer for Mean Girls being promoted. Twenty years after its original release, it is now a musical adaptation promising to be a production extravaganza with easy-to-remember tunes and spectacular choreography. It got me thinking that we do have a fascination with mean girls, the popular bullies who make life miserable for others.

    People have contradicting feelings toward mean girls. Just think of the Mean Girls movie set on a campus. The stereotypical mean girls are the cheerleaders, walking around in their cute uniforms. They are the high school’s team spirit generators. Many admire them, but many hate them too. They are admired because they usually are good-looking. They have the power to get what they want and even influence some administrators. But they also make life difficult for the underdogs.  

    In a 2018 article she wrote in Psychology Today, Katie Hurley said, “The ‘mean girl’ narrative is so ingrained in our culture that many consider it a ‘rite of passage’ of sorts when it comes to surviving girlhood.” That means one must grin and bear the existence of and maltreatment by these power-tripping girls and pray they get out alive! And if you suffer from poor mental health from constant bullying, well, you can seek treatment to “get over it.”

    Kirsten was the guest speaker at a women’s event. She admitted to exhibiting mean girl behavior in the past. She said, “I created pain in others!” This aggression resulted from losing her mom when she was only 12. Unable to properly process her grief from her loss, and without a mother to guide her to womanhood, she started watching how other young girls and women behaved. Her young mind was impressed by the beautiful, popular, mean girls at school. They got the best of everything and everyone. She decided that becoming one of them was her key to happiness. No one needed to know that she was in pain. She would cause the pain!

    “There’s a complex web of insecurity, anxiety, and conditioned attitudes that underlies the mean girl stereotype,” a Newport Academy article said. This means the power-tripping mean girl is basically like any other teenager—an immature individual going through self-esteem issues. There’s a lot of growing up and navigation happening within this person’s body, physically, emotionally, mentally, and socially. And left to her own whims and fantasies, she can choose to be part of the “queen bee” group and make life a living nightmare for someone else to mask her own difficulties. 

    The Mean Girls of the Bible

    As Solomon says, “There is nothing new under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 1:9). Mean girls have been in existence for thousands of years. Some of them have grown into women, yet never learned to shed their ugly behavior to do the right thing. Let’s look at some of them.

    “Ahab the son of Omri reigned over Israel in Samaria twenty-two years. And Ahab the son of Omri did evil in the sight of the Lord, more than all who were before him. And as if it had been a light thing for him to walk in the sins of Jeroboam the son of Nebat, he took for his wife Jezebel the daughter of Ethbaal king of the Sidonians, and went and served Baal and worshiped him. He erected an altar for Baal in the house of Baal, which he built in Samaria. And Ahab made an Asherah. Ahab did more to provoke the Lord, the God of Israel, to anger than all the kings of Israel before him” (1 Kings 16:29-33). 

    Here’s Ahab, who was influenced by his wife, Jezebel, to turn away from the One True God of Israel to become an idolater. Knowing how much God hated graven images and their worship, Ahab provoked his own King.

    Enter Elijah, God’s prophet, who came to Ahab to let him know that God spoke of a drought. During the dry years and while Elijah was away, Jezebel had killed most of God’s prophets except for the 100 hidden away by Obadiah (a man who feared the Lord and oversaw Ahab’s household) in caves.

    In the third year of the drought, there was an “accidental” meeting between Obadiah and Elijah. Elijah, again, was bringing the Word of God to Ahab. This was the message: “You have abandoned the commandments of the Lord and followed the Baals. Now therefore send and gather all Israel to me at Mount Carmel, and the 450 prophets of Baal and the 400 prophets of Asherah, who eat at Jezebel’s table” (1 Kings 18:18-19). 

    God made it known who He was and that Elijah was His mouthpiece through a miraculous battle. And all the prophets of Baal were slaughtered by Elijah:

    “Ahab told Jezebel all that Elijah had done, and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. Then Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying, ‘So may the gods do to me and more also, if I do not make your life as the life of one of them by this time tomorrow.’ Then [Elijah] was afraid, and he arose and ran for his life…” (1 Kings 19:1-3). 

    Perhaps cowering in fear of Jezebel’s wrath, Ahab decided that it was best to break the bad news of the slaying of Baal’s prophets to his mean-spirited wife to stir up her anger. Then, there’s Elijah who allowed a bully’s message to extinguish the fire of God’s victory. He succumbed to becoming a mean girl’s emotional and mental hostage.

    Then there’s Herodias and her daughter’s story. They used their influence to send someone to die.

    “For Herod had seized John and bound him and put him in prison for the sake of Herodias, his brother Philip’s wife, because John had been saying to him, ‘It is not lawful for you to have her.’ And though he wanted to put him to death, he feared the people, because they held him to be a prophet. But when Herod’s birthday came, the daughter of Herodias danced before the company and pleased Herod, so that he promised with an oath to give her whatever she might ask. Prompted by her mother, she said, ‘Give me the head of John the Baptist here on a platter.’ And the king was sorry, but because of his oaths and his guests he commanded it to be given. He sent had John beheaded in prison, and his head was brought on a platter and given to the girl, and she brought it to her mother.” Matthew 14:3-11

    An adulterous relationship was confronted by John and the involved parties didn’t like the message. The mean girls’ team of mother and daughter worked together to execute a perfect death plan. “Off with John’s head!” was the special request to the king. And then there was no more voice of righteousness to convict Herod and Herodias of their affair.

    Evil Begets Evil!

    Why is it so important to be the top dog? Kirsten, the guest speaker, said she used to scope out the room to find the current reigning “queen” and strategically planned her fall. Kirsten needed to be the alpha female and did everything in her power to make it happen!

    A mean girl’s desire to control everything begins when her life is in chaos! Jezebel’s prophets of Baal were dead, and she needed to punish Elijah for this. Herodias didn’t want to be reminded of her sin, so she needed to remove John from the picture. James said, “Sin when it is fully grown brings forth death” (1:15).

    Let’s wake up and see the truth! Mean girls are not worth emulating, even if they are portrayed as the popular people in society and are sometimes celebrated on TV, film, and social media! Mean girl motivations are wrong, and they need to be corrected before they destroy others. Just think of the influence of Jezebel to her husband and Herodias to her daughter. Not good at all! 

    The Apostle Paul said, “Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. For it is shameful to even speak of the things that they do in secret. But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says, ‘Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you’” (Ephesians 5:11-14).

    In the end, mean girls will also destroy themselves. Just watch the ending of the Mean Girls movie, if you get the chance. The Apostle Paul encourages us to “look carefully then how [we] walk, not as unwise but as wise!” while there is still time (Ephesians 5:15).

    Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/MangoStar_Studio

    Luisa Collopy is an author, speaker and a women’s Bible study teacher. She also produces Mula sa Puso (From the Heart) in Tagalog (her heart language), released on FEBC Philippines stations. Luisa loves spending time with her family over meals and karaoke!

    [ad_2]

    Luisa Collopy

    Source link