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Tag: Identifying the right man over 50

  • Addicted To A Man

    Addicted To A Man

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    5 Signs You Might Be Addicted To A Man and What You Can Do About It

    You can read the blog below or watch it on YouTube by clicking here.

    Back in my 40’s, I thought I loved a man who turned out to be so wrong for me.

    We’d broken up at least 3 times during the two and a half years we were together.

    But while apart, an intense longing for the other would occur.

    It was only a matter of time before we’d come back together to celebrate a harmonious honeymoon truce.

    But, it wouldn’t take long for the problems that created the breakup to reappear.

    Finally, after two and a half years I said ENOUGH…We’re DONE!

    I knew we didn’t belong together but I was not prepared for how hard it would be to let go of him.

    Even though I was the one who ended the relationship, I still felt so connected because every time I thought about him, my body was releasing Oxytocin, the bonding hormone which created the physical addiction I had to this man. 

    It took almost a year to break this hormonal addiction!

    I don’t want you to have to go through what happened to me and that’s why I want to share 5 signs that will help you identify whether or not you are addicted to a man and what you can do to break the cycle if this is happening in your life.

    Sign #1 – Oxytocin creates a high that is often mistaken for love.

    Normally, women experience the bonding that comes from Oxytocin for up to 2 weeks after being intimate with a man.

    If you’re addicted, you can trigger it every time you think about him or see his picture.

    When Oxytocin is released, it’s like getting a hit.

    It stops the longing and makes you feel connected all over again which feels good when you are in a relationship but really plays games with your head once you’ve broken up and want to disconnect.

    Sign #2 – Ask yourself what you really love about a man you feel an intense connection with.

    I loved this man but truthfully, we were so different that my friends would even say why are you with him?

    I kept coming back to the relationship because it felt so good when I was around him.

    You want to share similar values with a man and you want to feel emotionally safe which is pretty hard to feel when you are breaking up every 10 seconds.

    Sign #3 – Next, ask yourself what you don’t love about him.

    We kept breaking up for a reason.

    We had very little in common and there was a great deal I didn’t like about him including deal breakers I didn’t honor hoping he’d change for me.

    By the way, when you don’t honor your deal breakers you are settling.

    Sign #4 – Ask yourself if what he brings to the table is enough for the type of relationship you want to create with him.

    Other than the Oxytocin high, almost everything else in this type of relationship feels annoying, irritating, and unsolvable.

    That’s because the relationship doesn’t have enough to sustain it beyond the hormones keeping it together.

    Sign #5 – What you can do to overcome the addiction…

    The longing will come back, but with it, you’ll also feel a sense of freedom from being out from under a relationship that isn’t working.

    An Oxytocin addiction can stay with you for years.

    To break it, start by acknowledging this is occurring.

    Stop all contact with the man by phone, email, Facebook, and in person… Otherwise, the addiction starts all over again.

    You can do it, but it takes time.

    Be kind to yourself especially when you’re feeling frustrated because the addiction isn’t ending fast enough.

    Plan activities you can do that make you feel good.

    Get some friends together to be your support group.

    You will feel like a freak at times but know you aren’t alone.

    This happens to normal people all the time.

    The key is identifying it so you can take these 5 steps to overcome the Oxytocin high and move on.

    I found an Amazing Man

    I came to Lisa a broken and lost woman.  I’d lost my husband of 34 years to a rare disease.  After much personal grieving and growth, I connected with Lisa and joined her Love after 50 Coaching Group.  With Lisa’s encouragement and guidance, and the support of the other women in the group, I was able to take a leap of faith and joined an online dating site. I am happy to report I found an Amazing Gentleman and we’ve been dating for over four months now.  I am forever grateful to Lisa for all the advice she has shared with me.  Remember, no risk, no reward! Love and hugs Alex, Ohio

    I’d love to help you find an amazing man too.

    Let’s hop on a Complimentary Dating Breakthrough Call where we’ll take a look at what’s been working and not working in your love life and I’ll give you SPECIFIC feedback that will help you to finally attract, meet and keep the right man.

    Sound like a plan?

    If so, click here to book it right now :)​

    Believing in You!

    Lisa


    P.S. Whenever you are ready, here are four ways I can help you find love after 50

    #1: Get a copy of my book The Winning Dating Formula on Amazon



    Where I will walk you through a step-by-step breakdown of the exact tools and strategies you need for attracting the right man into your life — Click here

    #2: Join the Finding Love after 50 Facebook group

    It’s our Facebook community where you can connect with me and a community of women ready to support you on your journey for finding love after 50 — Click here

    #3: Work with me 1-on-1 or in my Group Program

    I would love to learn more about your dating journey, understand where you might be stuck, and give you a personalized step-by-step blueprint to attract the right man. And maybe even talk about how we can work together.

    If you are interested in learning more about how I can help, you can Click here to answer a few quick questions and schedule a call.

    #4: Subscribe to my YouTube Channel

    Click here to explore my YouTube channel for valuable tips on dating and relationships after 50! Discover insights that will empower you to attract the right partner with confidence.


    Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.

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    Aurelija Guerraea

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  • Can you trust men again after 50?

    Can you trust men again after 50?

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    Can you trust men again after 50?


    You can read the blog below or watch it on YouTube by clicking here.

    Have you ever been betrayed by a man you’d trusted with your heart and soul?

    When it happens, it can be so painful and it can shake you to your core causing you to not only doubt your ability to pick the right partner, but it can also skew your overall judgement about men, dating and relationships.

    The emotions that that come up –  like feeling ashamed for not noticing the signs sooner, or the anger you feel for allowing someone into your life who eventually caused you so much pain and heartache – can lead you to questioning your instincts and creating fear and hesitancy when it comes to trusting men again.

    Now you feel like only you can protect yourself, so you make men jump through hoops so you never get hurt again.

    Or on a date, you focus on his flaws, determined not to be deceived again or you go out there looking for someone who is perfect (all this does is leave you single and lonely for love because perfect doesn’t exist).

    These types of actions create a barrier that keeps you from forming the genuine connection you really want with a good man.

    That’s why today, I want to share three steps you can take to help you rebuild trust in both men and yourself so you can make that dream of a fulfilling relationship with a good man come true.

    Step #1: Healing and Forgiving

    When you’ve been hurt, you want to take enough time to heal and reconnect with yourself.

    It can be hard to acknowledge that you might have unintentionally attracted someone who wasn’t good for you.

    Yet recognizing this (without judging or putting yourself down) is the first step towards healing your heart.

    The next step comes from forgiveness – especially of yourself.

    For this, I recommend a practice called Ho’oponopono.

    The practice of Ho’oponopono is transformational, and you can learn more about it by clicking here.

    The story of how it came about is amazing and powerful!

    The process involves repeating these four simple sentences while focusing on forgiving yourself and the person who hurt you.

    – I love you.
    – I’m sorry.
    – Please forgive me.
    – Thank you.

    When I do this with clients, I have them put their hands over their heart and repeat these sentences 4 times or until they feel the negative emotions release.

    Holding onto the anger you have for yourself or for someone from your past keeps you emotionally tied to that pain (which keeps you more connected with that person) and it hinders your ability to move forward.

    But I get it – sometimes, letting go of negative feelings can be challenging.

    If Ho’oponopono doesn’t bring the relief you seek, reach out to a counselor or therapist.

    Professional support can be invaluable in helping you release any negative emotions you’re holding onto, and can pave the way for healthier relationships to come to you in the future.

    Step #2: Recognizing There Are Good Men Out There For You

    It’s important to remember that because one man hurt you doesn’t mean all men will.

    To help my clients overcome their fears about trusting men again, I teach them to use a tool called the “Trust Glasses.”

    When you wear what I call the “Grey Stormy” Trust Glasses, you’re viewing a man through a lens of distrust  assuming he will hurt you.

    This can lead you to losing out on a genuine connection with a potential partner who might be perfect for you but you were afraid to give him a chance.

    Instead, I encourage you to wear what I call the “Turquoise Glasses.”

    These glasses are like a calm ocean where you can see beautiful fish swimming close to the surface, yet you can also see any dangers that might be lurking under your feet.

    By wearing them, you can go on a date simply to observe and take your time getting to know a man without any expectations about the outcome.

    Rather than making him jump through hoops, view the date as an opportunity to meet someone new and interesting and focus on finding three positive qualities about him instead of looking for his flaws to protect yourself.

    Step #3: Truly Listen to What a Man Is Telling You

    If a man shares stories about having cheated on a previous partner, take it as a serious red flag.

    You might think he’s being vulnerable and would never do this if he truly loves you, but this is flawed thinking that can lead to you getting hurt.

    Don’t skip over red flags men share in their conversations and in their actions.

    Men mean what they say, so it’s important to listen carefully.

    When you do, you’ll be able to trust your instincts and make decisions that are best for you.

    Healing your heart and learning to trust again is a journey.

    It’s normal to feel a mix of shame, anger, and self-doubt after experiencing betrayal.

    It’s ok to be cautious, but it’s try not to let fear close you off from future opportunities for love.

    The steps I shared with you today – healing and forgiving, shifting your perspective using the Trust Glasses, and truly listening to men – will help you rebuild your confidence.

    Trusting again takes time, but with patience and self-compassion, you can create the future you envision with a good man.

    Remember, you deserve love and you have the strength to find it again.

    We’re all looking for the relationship Carole now has, right?

    Now to inspire you love after 50 is possible!

    I can’t believe it but I’m over 60 and in a GREAT RELATIONSHIP!

    I started my journey with Lisa 9 months ago with little hope of finding a man who could be interested in  me. Lisa helped me regain my self esteem and self confidence, helped me work through my feelings of anger, sadness, guilt  and my fears which were preventing me from letting go of the past and  from progressing on my new mission. I worked hard, her program was very useful in helping me define the type of man who would suit me best and bring me happiness. Here I am today in a great relationship! Many thanks Lisa for all your help!!! Carole, Montreal

    If creating a life together with a good man is something you’ve wanted, reply YES to this email and we’ll figure out the best way to get you the tools and support Carole used to find love again in her life after 50.

    Believing in You!

    Lisa


    Your Next Steps to Love after 50. . . .

    💞 Feeling like you are on a merry-go-round of mismatched dates? Lets press pause and talk about how we can write a new love story for you. Click here to start our conversation. Tell me your story – I am here to listen and guide you towards meeting someone truly special.

    If you are still gearing up for that step, I have plenty of insights and inspiration for you:

    1. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for heartfelt dating wisdom and uplifting success stories from women who have been just where you are. They found love, and so can you. Click here to watch and learn.

    2. Discover a new chapter in your dating life with my book, “The Winning Dating Formula.” It is more than a book; it is your journey to love mapped out. And it is just a click away on Amazon. Click here and start attracting the love you deserve.

    3. Join our Finding Love after 50 Facebook group to find camaraderie and connection. It is a warm and welcoming space to share your journey and receive support every step of the way. Click here to become part of our community.

    4. On the lookout for a dating site that resonates with you? Browse through my personal selection of the best dating sites tailor-made for fabulous over 50s. Click here and say goodbye to guesswork.

    Let these resources be your steppingstones to a love life filled with promise and joy. When you are ready, I am here to take that journey with you. Together, lets find your Mr. Right! 🌹

    Love this article? Sign up by clicking here to receive my weekly blog.

    Copyright© 2024 Lisa Copeland. All rights reserved.

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    Lisa

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