Rob Lowe Compares His Stint on ‘The West Wing’ to an Abusive Relationship

Walking away from The West Wing at the height of its success was “the best thing” Rob Lowe ever did, the actor has often declared in the years since his 2002 exit. He left the hit NBC drama before the end of season four, saying in a statement at the time that “it has been increasingly clear, for quite a while, that there was no longer a place for Sam Seaborn,” the White House deputy communications director he played, “on The West Wing.”

Lowe has become increasingly candid about his departure since, even comparing the experience to an “abusive” relationship on a recent episode of Penn Badgley’s Podcrushed podcast. “I could see them having first girlfriends or friends and being in a relationship that was abusive and taking it,” he said of his sons. “‘She’s the popular girl, everybody likes her, she’s beautiful, it must be great’—all the things that people would say about making The West Wing to me. ‘It’s so popular, it’s so amazing, it must be amazing.’ But I know what it’s like, and if I couldn’t walk away from it, then how could I empower my kids to walk away from it?”

He added, “I walked away from the most popular girl at school, but I also knew that it was a super unhealthy relationship, and it was the best thing I ever did.”

Lowe has addressed why he parted ways with the Emmy-winning show on numerous occasions. In his 2012 memoir, Stories I Only Tell My Friends, Lowe recalls meeting with series creator Aaron Sorkin to air grievances about his pay and storylines. “I tell him: ‘I know that Sam Seaborn is the part of a lifetime. I love this part unlike anything I’ve ever encountered. But I think it’s bullshit that I’m the only actor on the show who hasn’t been given even a penny raise,” he writes. Lowe says he went on to suggest that if more money was not possible, meatier material might be. “But I want to stay if we can grow this part creatively. If there is no financial future, let’s make a creative future,’” he writes, adding, “When our meeting ends without any plan, I know it is time to move on.” An official statement from John Wells Productions and Warner Brothers Television at the time said Lowe’s leave was done “amicably.”

In 2015, Lowe told GQ: “I never had any issues with Aaron. To his credit, Aaron writes what he wants to write, and he’s not telling anybody, ‘I’m going to guarantee you two great [storylines].’ And I loved The West Wing. But man, it was grueling.” He went on to note that the show was filmed near the Friends stage: “We would roll in at, like, 6 in the morning, and the ‘friends’ would come in, in their Ferraris and Lamborghinis, like, at 11:30 a.m., and by midnight they would have shot their show. They’d be gone and we’d be there until 6 in the morning. The sun would rise. That would never happen in TV today. Never. They’d never pay for the overtime. It was a moment in time, both in terms of the economics of the business and how successful the show was.”

Lowe told Empire in 2014 that he has “even less regret now” about leaving when he did because Sorkin would depart the series not long after his own exit. “The universe works in mysterious ways and for me it worked out perfectly. With all respect to everybody else, Aaron is and was The West Wing, full stop,” Lowe told the outlet. “There’s no West Wing without him.”

Alas, the idealistic political drama would air for another three seasons without Sorkin’s involvement. Lowe went on to reprise his role for two episodes during The West Wing’s final season in 2006 and once again for 2020’s HBO reunion special to benefit “When We All Vote.”