Long before she nabbed the part of Eli’s mother Frankie, Tonkin was your average fan of Dalton’s most-talked-about work. She remembers the book being everywhere in Australia when it first came out. It was the book-club book at the time, and her mother gifted her with it for Christmas in 2019. When she got the job a few years later, Tonkin revisited the material, and this time, reading it was a bit surreal. Instead of picturing someone else as Frankie, she was picturing herself. The original text ultimately became Tonkin’s bible while filming. “Having a book, especially a book so detailed as Trent’s book, was so invaluable for creating this story,” Tonkin says. “Television is also a very different medium, but it just added such a strong foundation.” 

In addition to the book, Tonkin consistently referred back to an interview with Dalton where he explained his reasons for writing the book. “[Trent] shared that he was sitting with his mom, who Frankie is based on, in the garden with his young daughters. He shared that his mom turned to him and said, ‘I wouldn’t change anything in my life because it all led to this moment sitting here with you and watching my grandchildren dancing in the sunlight,’” she says. “For me, every time I would have a question about a scene or a line, it all just went back to that. … Even though things can be really hard and so unfair and so painful, there is something to be gleaned out of it. Hopefully, we’re all lucky enough to get to the end of our lives and look back at the patchwork of what got us there and think the same thing—that I wouldn’t have made any different decisions because I would have not wanted to change anything. For me, that was essentially the essence of the book and the essence of the show as well.”

Throughout the series, we see Frankie at different stages of her addiction—going through withdrawals, doing drugs, and recovering—but despite her sometimes questionable decision-making, Frankie’s love for her children is her North Star always. For Tonkin, this became her objective and driving force throughout the six months of filming. “Just because she doesn’t always make the perfect choice as a mother doesn’t mean she’s not a good mom, and it doesn’t mean she’s not trying to be a good mom, so for me, it was holding onto that piece of information. She just loves her kids so much, and she’s doing the best she can, and sometimes, that is it,” Tonkin explains.

Where the role became truly transformative for Tonkin was in the research. She immersed herself in as many books, blogs, and podcasts on addiction and recovery as possible. She read countless firsthand stories from people struggling with addiction themselves as well as their families. “I’ve always had so much compassion for people who struggle with addiction, and the stigma that people aren’t trying their best is just not true,” she says. “Looking at people’s stories like that versus this cliché idea of doing drugs, there’s a reason for it. There’s remorse. There’s guilt. There’s pain.” 

There’s a line in the show that says, “It gets so good that you’ll forget it was ever bad.” It goes back to the message Dalton shared about his mother: After it all, she has no regrets because it got her to where she is today. Tonkin still repeats that line to herself all the time, especially when things aren’t good. It’s a constant reminder that, despite any turmoil in life, there is still hope.  

Jessica Baker

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