How to manage a breakup, 5 top tips to coping when your relationship ends. Learning to live without the person you have been with can be one of the hardest things we face as humans and it can take some time and guidance. Although you may be feeling scared, lonely, confused, abandoned or even a bit relieved, you won’t feel like this forever and there are things that can help you with the process.

Allow yourself to feel sadness. It is a grieving process so let yourself be sad. Experience the pain you are feeling and pour those feelings out. Try to find a balance with this though as you don’t want to live in self-pity constantly. Let yourself feel sadness and then force yourself to do one normal or routine thing that you would usually do.

Be kind to yourself. This is a challenging time for you and it will feel like a huge rollercoaster. Try to be kind to yourself when you aren’t behaving exactly as you would usually be. Be patient in knowing you will be ok again but it just takes some time and a bit of work. Make the most of any friendships you have and allow them to take care of you or sit with you when you are feeling sad.

Accept that you aren’t meant to be together. This breakup has happened for a reason and if the other person is in agreement that it wasn’t working out, don’t feel the need to convince them they are wrong. A relationship is only successful when both parties want it and it is not fair to burden yourself with the sole responsibility of making it good. Remember, you deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you and don’t forget it.

Limit contact. Try to remove any temptation of reaching out to your ex. Try to avoid seeing photos or remembering the good times. There were also bad times! Lots of them, and reasons why you aren’t together now. Having easy access to your ex will keep you stuck in the cycle of having the comfort of them. Try to avoid this and put yourself first.

Talk to a professional. Talking about what has happened can help you to make sense of the experience and find a way to move forward effectively instead of destructively. We offer a FREE 20 minute telephone session to get started, book yours here.

Shenni

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