Saturday, 28 January 2023
Harry and Meghan were spotted by paparazzi in the Maldives Islands, half naked, rolling around in the tropical surf, and feeding each other shrimp cocktails.
But there was something strange, reported Super Paparazzi, Enzo Lambourgini …
… they looked different somehow … and then Enzo (who has problems seeing out of his right eye) realized what it was!
They had both dyed their hair!
Harry is now a blonde and Meghan is a redhead. But wait! There’s more!
Harry now has brown skin and Meghan has orange skin in a botched dye job. (They’re approaching Oompa Loompa levels of skin pigment!)
Paparazzi around the world see what’s going on. The former Royals, or whatever they are, are trying to vanish. It’s hard to disappear when everyone in the world knows your name and face and serial number.
Nice try, H&M – but Enzo and his friends are smarter than the average camouflage. Just as a tiger can’t change its spots, so too can’t a Royal change his –
– fucking vacation in the Maldives! Must be nice – are you kidding – are you hurting for money – my god – and how much did that dye cost?!
Sorry, end of report. I need a vacation. Maybe if I dress up like them … an idea brews.
