[EP36] How To Activate Feminine Energy

Transcript

Welcome back to another episode of The Awakened Wife Podcast. I’m Natasha Koo. And today, like you is just you and me. And we’re going to be talking about how to activate your feminine energy, and how to use your feminine energy in your marriage or relationship. So in the past, the previous two episodes 34 law of polarity and relationships, and also Episode 35, how to reignite the sexual polarity within your man. These are all great episodes to listen to if you haven’t already because today we’re going to be talking about feminine energy. So how does that play out? And what does that really mean to understand that polarity, I really recommend listening to the two previous episodes. Now, today, it’s just you and me. Jachym, he was taking a break, he’ll actually be back next week for his own man cave episode, to explore how he experiences you know, this feminine energy and how it, how it rejuvenates him and how he is impacted by it, for example, within our relationship and his take on it, but today is really my take on it in my personal experience. 

Now, when we talk about how to activate your feminine energy, I do want to kind of give you an idea of where I’m coming from. One is not necessarily an energetic practice I’m not talking about it’s not even a spiritual practice that is extremely practical. Okay. And the reason why I say this is because we have so many facets of ourselves. And most of the time, we don’t uncover it until way later in life, or when something super challenging comes along, or when we’re forced to reveal or learn something about ourselves. So for me, when especially when it comes to relationships, it’s the playground to really figure out who you are, who you want to be both as an individual and also as a wife, as a woman. 

And for me, I think there’s no richer space, and to be within a relationship or within a marriage with my husband, because it’s a place where I can be myself, I can explore who I am, I can be myself. And it’s a place where I can really vulnerably show who I am now, within this context, then it is the best place to activate and to show and to share, and to express yourself that feminine energy. Now it’s all within us. But so many of us struggle to actually connect to this because most of us man or female, or no matter what you identify your gender energy to be. It is an extremely masculine world that we live in. So it means that his very forward, the focus is very future-focused, his very productivity and efficiency focus is productivity and production and utility-focused. 

So this constant drive to move forward and to go a certain focus direction and to improve and to level up and you know, all this, even when I describe that it doesn’t sound relaxing, right? It doesn’t sound flowing, it doesn’t sound fluid, it actually sounds like that you have to go in that direction, and that there is not much wiggle room to it. And so what does it mean to actually be feminine? And what does it mean to actually come from a place that is fluid and natural and beautiful and feminine within you. And so one way to access this energy and each person is totally different. I can’t tell you how you will express your feminine energy. 

But for me and the woman who I’ve worked with even way before your exceptional relationship when I used to coach women only the one big thing, the really huge thing that everyone can take as a first step when you want to know how to activate and to use your feminine energy within the relationship is to actually fully take care of yourself. I know a lot of people will talk about self-care and all that kind of thing. But I want to break it down for you. And they might be different than what you’ve heard out there, okay? It has nothing to do with candles has nothing to do with bubble baths, it has nothing to do with doing your nails or whatever it is, taking care of yourself, actually has two components. And when you know this, you live this, then your feminine energy and your expression will flow freely. I promise you that. 

But first, you have to take care of yourself. So taking care of yourself comes into in this way, at least for me, it’s a very profound thing to actually take care of yourself, okay? Because most of us live, not taking care of ourselves, not knowing what we need, and not respecting. What is it what it is that we do need to pay. There are a lot of external factors. And yes, you have to live life. And yes, there are things to take care of. But no one, no one can take care of us. If we don’t first acknowledge ourselves, respect ourselves, and then take care of ourselves. Okay. And so the first kind of way of doing this first step to take in order to take care of yourself so that you can bring out that feminine energy because when you do take care of yourself, everything flows. Well, actually, I guess I should break this down even more because there are two steps to how to activate it right? 

But why? Why take care of yourself, and why does it work? Why does taking care of yourself actually activate your feminine energy, I think that’d be a great place to start and to share with you. I know from personal experience that when I don’t take care of myself when I’m in a bad mental or physical state of being, man, everything irritates me, I’m irritable. I’m easily annoyed. I’m easily frustrated, angry, I’m out of energy. Tea, coffee doesn’t taste the same anymore. I’m not listening to what it is, I really truly need in terms of food, or what exercise or like, the world is just dim and grim. You know, those days where it’s, it’s just, you’re not having what you need in this life. So things look gray, nothing tastes good, and, and you’re just barren. 

That’s a good word like barren, you’re empty. And you’re not connected to that life energy where things are vibrant and fun. And you taste things you feel things in, you’re fully immersed in living. Right. And so for me, to activate and to live out this feminine energy is such a beautiful and such a natural thing for us that first of all, all we need to do is really take care of ourselves. But first, we need to know what to do. And also we need to know that, you know, when we are in a good place, when we are able to give ourselves that it’s wonderful, like men or your husband, they want to be around you people want to be around your children want to actually be around you. Because you’re in a good place. Right. And so for me, this is foundational to actually activating your feminine energy. So let’s get into it. Sorry, I teased you before. 

But now let’s get into the two ways in which and two steps in which you can take care of yourself. The first one, you probably haven’t heard this really out there when it comes to self-care is to know your truth. Okay? What does that really mean? Know your truth? It means that you take the time you take the space, you give yourself respect. You give yourself the acknowledgment and the compassion and empathy to actually feel and then figure out and find out your truth. Whether it’s something that you need, emotionally, maybe you need to talk to someone, maybe it’s time to see a friend, it’s time to be social. Or it’s something physical like you want to move your body you’re tired of sitting here or you know, you want to experience something new, or you just need to take something off your to-do list and just give yourself a break this evening. Right or to ask for help. Knowing your truth that requires you to listen to yourself, it requires you to actually be there for yourself. 

And that’s how you actually begin to know what it is that you need. Not just for yourself, but also from your partner. Right. And so this is step one of taking care of yourself is to know your truth, know yourself, and to feel it and to acknowledge it and be fully respected. This sounds easy, right? Just know yourself, and then, you know, just do it. But so many of us, women have been brought up in such a way where we put everybody else’s needs before us. It feels so familiar, so normal, to always cater to other people to always give in to other people. But you need to know yourself before you expect others, like your husband, to actually read your mind and to give, figure out what it is that you need. Because connecting yourself is one thing, while the guests work from your partner to you is a completely different thing. And we can’t give that responsibility to other people. And so when you’re living your true when you respect yourself when you’re connecting to yourself, you’re giving yourself that empathy, that respect the compassion. 

That is such a magnetic and beautifully feminine quality. Because you’re going inward, you’re not going that crazy productivity effectiveness, going up, climbing up the ladder, like that kind of energy, right? It’s just what is here, what is here within me right now what is here inside of me what calls for my attention? What can I give myself and you’re coming into yourself feeling that bathing in that and then comes the next step. But already in this, in this first step, knowing your truth and, and, and then giving it your all not just doing it a little bit so that you know this homework is done. But really tapping into that.

Within our signature coaching program, the Cherished Wife Program did a whole pillar on this of unleashing your Goddess within. And there’s no way we can unleash any Goddess within we don’t acknowledge that we’re here and that we need certain things and that we can and should listen to those desires, right, and needs. And I go into much more detail within the program. But this is just a small snippet of what it is that, you know, I’ve taught for so many years and also have lived for so many years. Now, the second step, to taking care of yourself, which in turn, really helps you to express and use your feminine energy within your relationship and with your partner in your marriage is to live your truth. Okay, to live your truth.

This actually requires a great deal of courage. It steps away from fear, and doubt self doubt. living your truth means that you value you see, you’ve listen to yourself enough and deeply enough that you actually do something about it. Right? So sometimes, you know, when you know you, like there’s something on your mind and it’s bothering you like, oh, I should do that for myself, like, Oh, I’m tired, I should grab a cup of water. Or oh, you know, I don’t I don’t feel so good in my body. I really want to move a little bit. Those little hunches come those little nudges come you know, throughout their day. But how many of those nudges that actually help us to take care of ourselves and help us to bring back and, and be full within our tank so that we can exhibit this beautiful feminine energy? 

How many of those nudges do we actually listen to and act upon? A lot of times we hear it, we know what we should do and we just don’t do it. We don’t do it. Right. So I can tell you right now. How did I take care of myself and how do I did I know my truth and live my truth? Right before this podcast minutes before this podcast. I was lying on my bed and just taking a quick rest. A quick nap because I needed it. I needed it in order to show up here and be with you. And I need it because after this podcast I’m going to be with our My daughter who’s just a bit more than six months old, and has special needs, right? 

So a lot is demanded from me. But a lot then needs to come back within me. And that means I have to live that truth, I had to live that truth. And all this is based on respect back to yourself. Now, when you live your truth, it can come in different formats. One is that you start to speak your truth, right, you start to say to others, what it is that you actually need. Communication with your partner becomes clearer becomes more transparent becomes more honest, you set boundaries, because you know your truth. So you actually speak up for yourself, and you say no to things that you don’t need, and you can’t, you can’t have in your life you don’t want in your life, right. And all of these things actually really helped to guide you within your relationship. 

Because this connection to yourself, and this outward expression of yourself brings a certain type of flavor into your relationship, which then if you’ve listened to the past two episodes, really melt the polarity of the feminine and masculine together within your relationship. And so to live your truth means that we have to step away from certain mental ideas or limiting beliefs that we might have about ourselves that we aren’t good enough or that you know, we’re not deserving of it. Or that it’s not time right now, there are other things that are more important. So, to live, your truth is to actually step away from certain patterns of your past, and to step away from the familiar. And to then explore, and to be, and to just, like, go a little bit and trust yourself. Now, this, these are the two steps to take care of yourself to know your truth. And to live your truth. It sounds so simple and an absolutely are two very simple steps. But to actually embody it requires you to see yourself differently, right? So we want to activate our feminine energy, we want to use our feminine energy within our relationship. But the question I have for you is, do you feel worthy? Do you feel enough? 

Do you feel beautiful? Do you feel full? Okay, do you feel full within you that you actually have something to give, they actually have something to give to your partner and within your relationship. If you’re so exhausted, so tired or so rundown, by doing things that you don’t want to, then it is extremely difficult, if not impossible, to then connect to your feminine energy. So that is the first step is to take care of ourselves. And I can promise you this, no matter how much your partner loves you, this isn’t something that they can do for you. Because they don’t know what you need. And they can guess until the end of the world but they just won’t get it. 

Because the first person who needs to listen first is you. And so once we do, activate your feminine energy, it’s like you begin to unlock who you truly and fully are, you can begin to dream more. And you can begin to share those visions and dreams with your partner you’re able to play and to try and to express yourself not really worrying about the outcome, and how it will turn out. And for your man to receive this and I’m sure yeah, he will share a lot more about this on the next episode about his personal experiences with this. But as a woman to be this is such a carefree way of being right you can let go of those packages and you can just be yourself. And you can express yourself fully. You can move your body flow freely, and you can heal, you can heal personally for me, unless I know my truth and unless I live my truth. There’s a great deal of pain and trauma and healing that gets stuck when you do not do these two things. Okay? 

Because as long as you do not take care of yourself by knowing and living your truth, in some ways, you are still hiding behind the facade. You’re still hiding behind things that have happened that you will not currently accept at all. Okay, because unless you live your truth and and you know your choose, you can set your boundaries. And that means that again and again, you’re going to get hurt by other people, including your partner within your relationship, it means that when it’s time to speak up for yourself, you won’t, it means that when it’s time to actually, you know, share what it is that you feel, you can’t feel it, you can connect to yourself. And that is a complete cut off from who you are, and your feminine energy. And so this is my take on activating the feminine energy. And my, my version of self care is that simple. 

But from from from bottom of my heart, I want to tell you that, even for me as a, as from my own personal experience, it really wasn’t an easy thing to do. And I know that a lot of women we actually struggle with the word, female woman, mom, daughter, sister, these are heavily loaded words, these are words where we have lots of thinking around, we have lots of lots of judgments around, and lots of expectations. And straightaway, we put ourselves into certain boxes for who we need to be and how we need to perform, which is again, extremely masculine. So in order to even get over a lot of the conflicts, and arguments and issues within your own relationship, the first step we can do is to pivot away from the other person and her back to you. We do that by filling ourselves up by taking care of ourselves, and then to really show up, show up, not because you should or have to, because you know what is true for you. 

So this is all I wanted to share with you today, I hope that it makes sense to you. For me, it’s an extremely practical way of being because I think everyone knows this, right? That mom, that wife, who’s constantly irritated, who’s constantly pissed off, who, who has a habit husband, who constantly annoys her, and who can’t get anything, right. And she just seems friggin miserable the whole time. Okay, and I can promise you, when she’s coming from that place, there are lots of wounds, there’s lots of trauma, there’s lots of hurt, that has not been healed. And she is not taking care of herself, she is not living her truth, she’s denying her truth. And she is definitely not knowing or living her full feminine expression. So in this way, I do want to say that, hey, the feminine is beautiful, the masculine craves us to show up fully, for us to let our hair down to let go. 

And just to be that to embody that. But first of all, it takes courage from within you to actually step into that. Because having a cherished, you know, feeling within your heart every time at the end of the day knowing that you are so loved and so taken care of and, and you’re just you know, the woman of your man’s dreams, that is possible, but only when you actually are in an OK space yourself. And that process must be started from you, and is not a job for your husband, to then do and to complete within you. Right. So when both polarity and put both energies are existing and fiber within the relationship can definitely play off of itself. Okay. 

But when you are completely dry, and empty yourself, it’s next to impossible to then play how that marriage as a playground for you to enjoy and to have fun and to play. And so those are my two cents on how to activate your feminine energy and to how to use your feminine energy within your relationship or your marriage. I hope that it points you in a certain direction. And that direction is definitely within you. And I know that who you really are and the truth within you, it really wants to come out and might have been deemed by previous boyfriends or even the current relationship. But it’s up to you to kind of hold yourself up and say, You know what, in this life, I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna do it for myself. I’m not gonna let myself down.

I’m not gonna let other people that myself down. I’m gonna actually be who I’m here to be. And that could be this beautiful feminine expression of mine. But first I need to take care of myself. I need to know my truth and to connect to that if I’ve become numb, and oblivious to it. And I’ve forgotten how to know that. And I’m to live it because I, someone needs to speak up for myself. And that needs to be me. And so those are the things that can give you the best life that you could pray for. It brings so much energy back in, and it makes it beautiful. And it makes you and your husband kind of come together in this magnificent way that it’s really hard to have, when you don’t care, take care of yourself, and don’t activate your feminine energy naturally. And so, I hope that you’ve learned a thing or two from this episode. 

Those are the things that I’ve experienced for myself, and that I have taught other women all over the years. And I hope that you take away feeling a little bit more like that, you can, you can do this, and that you’re worthy of it. And you can have what you want. But it’s up to you to grasp it and to reach for it. And to be it. If all this sounds just perfect, absolutely perfect to you. But you don’t know how to begin, or it’s so new to you, it almost sounds scary, that I really, really encourage you to head over to yourexceptionalrelationship.com/cherished. There you can find out how you can work with us what our pro coaching program is all about. And how we can absolutely just change the quality of life for you, because you can heal your relationship you can heal, you know, your own wounds, feminine wounds, and you can be you can be happy and you can really be who you’re meant to be in this lifetime. 

Without the conflicts without that argument without all that pain and suffering that we so many of us go through within our homes due to our relationships. So if that’s what you need, then I really encourage you to reach out because I’m here for you. And until next week, yeah, he’s gonna come back and speak with you and give his take on why it’s so beautiful and valuable that you as a wife, connect your feminine energy and how it truly impacts and balances and really really rejuvenates the mat. So until then, and if you need to check out the show notes or get the transcript or anything that I mentioned within this episode today. Then make sure to head over to your exceptional relationship comm four slash 36 The number three and six until then, and thanks for joining me today.