Does Sex Before Marriage Affect The Relationship? – Marriage Helper

As human beings, there’s no denying that we are inherently sexual beings. It’s an essential part of the way we are made. While there are exceptions, like asexual individuals, the vast majority of us are wired for sexual experiences. In this blog post, we’ll delve into the topic of premarital sex and its prevalence in American society. Is it a good thing, a bad thing, or does it make no difference at all? Let’s explore the subject with Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Beam Holmes.

The Prevalence of Premarital Sex

It is undeniable that pre-marital sex is incredibly widespread in modern society. Numerous studies have proven the prevalence of sexual activity among individuals of various age groups. Research has shown that most people, married and unmarried, engage in sexual activity, with many starting on average at 14. It’s also worth noting that some married individuals may also engage in extramarital affairs. However, for this discussion, we’ll focus on unmarried people contemplating sexual compatibility before marriage.

The Myth of Sexual Compatibility

One common argument in favor of having sex before marriage is the notion of sexual compatibility. People argue that to have a successful marriage, you should have sex to determine if one’s sexual desires align with your partner’s. However, this thinking overlooks the deeper implications and consequences of multiple sexual partners. Recently, one of us happened to catch a conversation between two girls discussing the timing of when sex typically starts in a relationship. They agreed that it often begins on the third date after a couple has started seeing each other. All we could think was how dangerous this way of thinking was because we know how destructive that can be for a future marriage. If you marry that person, or even worse, if you DON’T marry that person, it will inevitably impact the sexual satisfaction you have in your marriage. 

The Downsides of Multiple Sexual Partners

Engaging in numerous sexual encounters before marriage can have negative effects on a future marriage relationship. When people have multiple sexual partners, they inadvertently condition themselves to expect novelty, variety, and constant excitement in their sexual experiences. This mindset can significantly impact their satisfaction within a committed marriage, leading to comparisons and feelings of dissatisfaction.