It is often painful and disorienting when life throws us a curve ball. One of the curviest of curveballs is breaking up with a loved one who has found their way into our heart. How can we heal from the emotional pain of a sudden ending, even if it happened long ago? How can we tap into inner resources so that we might heal and move on? Dealing with loss without losing yourself is an important skill..
The Buddha’s story of the two arrows can offer a psychologically sound view of dealing with adversity. The first arrow refers to the unpleasant things that happen to us. After a breakup, there’s the loss of the comfort and connection we’ve relied upon. Similar to the death of a loved one, there is the shocking finality of no longer sharing your life.
John Amodeo, PhD, MFT
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