The cost of wine will certainly be going up as a recent mudslide has destroyed over 30 of Italy’s best vineyards.
The mudslide nicknamed “II Fango,” struck at 3:33 am, Cleveland time.
Early reports are that two of “The Boot Country’s” major vineyards, Vino Fields 707 and The Gina Lollabridgida Wine Inc. were almost totally destroyed.
The executive director of the 707 said that the only thing that is not covered in mud are the Vino Fields 707 Souvenir Key Chains.
Local police said the director whines too much and is acting totally grape-nuts over the situation. When pressed for further comment, the officer said he had no more puns and vanished in a puff of banality.
Word from the office of Italian President Sergio “Grapes” Mattarella is that he is considering purchasing millions of grapes from the African country of Kamgooganda.
Which is nice…