EVANSTON, IL—Finding it impressive that a young and largely inexperienced writer could create such professional work, journalism professors at Northwestern University reportedly praised a promising student Monday for his proficiency in parroting corporate talking points. “Incredible! Martin is watering down the facts to appease company shareholders at a level that took me years to achieve,” Medill School of Journalism professor Ronald Simpson said of a first-year graduate student, remarking that he “clearly has what it takes” to push corporate agendas for a major metropolitan newspaper after graduation. “Typically, it takes years to unlearn journalistic ethics, but this student is way ahead of the curve in terms of silencing his own skepticism in favor of regurgitating quotes from those in power. In one piece alone, he seamlessly wove a Democratic operative’s vague response to a sex scandal with sponsored content for Buick—and somehow avoided saying anything at all despite writing 1,800 words on the matter. He hasn’t even taken the coursework on finding and obscuring questionable sources yet, but he’s already quoting his parents’ powerful friends in stories over and over again without disclosing the personal connection. It’s both refreshing and inspiring to find such militant obedience in a young student.” At press time, Simpson was said to have teared up when the student turned in a word-for-word reproduction of a police department press release as his final project in an investigative journalism class.
