Lupita Nyong’o is grateful for the healing that comes from community. 

When the Black Panther star’s relationship with Selema Masekela came to an end last fall, Lupita chose to share the news of her breakup publicly. Now she’s revealing why she first decided to do so—and why she’s so grateful she did. 

“In my mind, when I shared my relationship status with the world, it was because I felt sure about it,” Lupita told Net-a-Porter in an interview published Feb. 26. So when her relationship came to an end, she added, “I was living in a lot of pain and heartbreak. I looked at the environment of my social media and thought, I don’t want to be a part of this illusion that everything is always coming up roses. Surely there is a lesson for me to learn in this, and I just want to be real about it.”

And she felt immediate relief after posting her vulnerable message in October.

“I knew how it could be interpreted; I knew it would have a life of its own,” the 40-year-old said. “But then I started to see the comments and people were being so loving and supportive. The ones that moved me the most were other people sharing their pain and their heartbreak.”

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