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Laboy, a retired chef, began seeing a substance-use counselor after telling his doctor he felt depressed, unmotivated and increasingly isolated as his drinking and cannabis use escalated.

“These days, I carry two things in my hands: my vape and my cellular — that’s it,” he said. “I’m not proud of it, but it’s the reality.”

Cannabis eases his anxiety and “settles his spirit,” but he’s noticed it affects his concentration. He hopes to learn to read music, but sustaining focus at the piano has grown difficult.

He’s seen an addiction psychiatrist for six months, but he hasn’t been able to cut back. The medical system doesn’t seem equipped to help, he said.

“They’re not ready yet,” Laboy said. “I go to them for help, but all they say is, ‘Try to smoke less.’ I already know that — that’s why I’m there.”

Younger users describe a similar slide — one that begins with relief and ends somewhere harder to define.

Brain fog becomes ‘your new normal’

Kyle, a 20-year-old Boston University student, says cannabis helps him manage panic attacks he’s had since high school. He spoke on the condition that only his first name be used because he buys cannabis illegally.

In the Allston apartment he shares with fraternity brothers, they have a communal bong.

When he’s high, Kyle feels calm — and able to process anxious thoughts and feel a sense of gratitude. But that clarity has become harder to reach when he’s sober.

“I think I was able to do that better a year ago,” he said. “Now I can only do it when I’m high, which is scary.”

He said the brain fog and feeling of detachment develop so gradually they become “your new normal.” Some mornings, he wakes up feeling like an observer in his own life, struggling to recall the day before. “It can be tough to wake up and go, ‘Oh my God, who am I?’” he said.

Still, he doesn’t plan to stop anytime soon.

Kyle says cannabis helps him function — more than seeking professional treatment would. Doctors say that ambivalence is common: many people feel cannabis is both the problem and the solution.

A dream turns into a nightmare

Anne Hassel spent a month in jail and a year on probation for growing cannabis in the 1980s. She cried when Massachusetts’ first dispensaries opened — and left her physical therapy career to get a job at one.

Within a year, though, “my dream job turned into a nightmare,” she said.

Hassel, 58, said some consultants pushed staff to promote high-potency concentrates as “more medicinal,” downplaying their risks. After trying her first dab — a nearly instantaneous, “stupefying” high — she began using 90% THC concentrate several times a day.

Her use quickly became debilitating, she said. She lost interest in things she once loved, like mountain biking. One autumn day, she drove to the woods and turned back without getting out. “I just wanted to go to my friend’s house and dab,” she said. “I hated myself.”

She didn’t seek formal treatment but recovered with the help of a friend. Riding her green motorcycle — once named “Sativa” after her favorite strain — has helped her reconnect to her body and spirit.

Dr. Kevin Hill, an addiction director at Boston’s Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center who specializes in cannabis use disorder, said the biggest gap is education, among both consumers and clinicians.

“I think adults should be allowed to do what they want as long as it doesn’t hurt anybody else,” but many users don’t understand the risks, Hill said.

He said the conversation shouldn’t be about prohibition but about balance and informed decision-making. “For most people, the risks outweigh the benefits.”