Woman accused of being a “gold digger” for free vacation praised online

A man calling his best friend’s new partner a gold digger for accepting an all-expenses-paid vacation—despite going on several free trips financed by his own girlfriend’s family—is being slammed online.

In a post shared on Reddit, user u/First_Feature_769 wrote that her boyfriend Aiden hates his best pal Daniel’s new girlfriend, Lila.

“I don’t exactly get the reason for his dislike,” the Redditor wrote. “My guess is that Aiden and Daniel were kind of outcasts in high school and Aiden adapted this ‘us against the world’ view with his only friend.

“Lila on the other hand is a very lively, outgoing, bubbly girl with tons of friends,” she added.

Apparently, Aiden is always coming up with reasons to dislike Lila, with the latest being Daniel’s decision to take her on an all-expenses-paid vacation.

“He was ranting to me about Lila being a gold-digger and using Daniel for his money,” the Redditor explained.

“I tried to tell him that Daniel taking his girlfriend on a vacation doesn’t make said girlfriend a gold-digger, but Aiden couldn’t be reasoned with.”

Sick of his attitude, she reminded Aiden that her family took him on countless vacations—free of charge—while they were at college.

“I asked him why is what Daniel and Lila are doing any different,” she wrote. “If that makes Lila a gold-digger, he must be a gold-digger too, by his own standards.”

Unfortunately, Aiden was offended by her response. “[He] said that he is extremely disappointed and hurt that I look at him like that,” First_Feature_769 wrote.

“He now seems to think that I actually accused him of being a gold-digger instead of just trying to show him the error in his reasoning.”

Fellow Reddit users backed the poster. In the poll attached to the post, they voted for her, although they suggested that she look deeper into her boyfriend’s behavior.

The Origin of ‘Gold Diggers’

From the Amber Heard-Johnny Depp domestic abuse trial to relationship forums, the term “gold digger” is thrown around a lot—both online and in real life.

In December 2021, a 16-year-old shocked Reddit users with her first-date story, after the boy called her a gold digger for splitting the check evenly. In July 2022, a woman asked for advice on handling her boyfriend’s pals who say she is just after his money—not realizing she actually makes much more than he does.

Historian and author Erin Johnson told Newsweek that the term originates from the early 20th century, but in the past, a woman marrying for money was usually a necessity, rather than a choice.

“The concept of a female gold digger can be seen in literature and period dramas today, but not because of a desire to pursue a man for his money,” she said.

“Many women of the middle and upper classes were not supposed to work, unless their families were in trade professions and needed help. Girls were expected to be charming and beautiful, not to balance a check book,” Johnson added.

“In the 1995 film Sense and Sensibility, Emma Thompson tells Hugh Grant’s character that ‘you will inherit your fortune. We cannot even earn ours.’

“This knowledge that her character could not work, despite needing an income, meant that her only option was to marry into a fortune.”

Still, the term has inherently sexist connotations. Allana Luke, 24, travels with the world with her wealthy 56-year-old partner Jeff Winn, and regularly receives messages from trolls with the slur of “gold digger.”

“If there’s a photo of me and Jeff, and Jeff looks particularly older, someone will direct message me abuse,” she told Newsweek. “But it’s just jealousy. We just laugh them off.”

‘Extremely Hypocritical’

In her post, First_Feature_769 wrote that she doesn’t understand her boyfriend Aiden’s hatred for his best pal’s girlfriend.

She is also confused about why he believes Lila is a gold digger for accepting an all-expenses-paid trip from Daniel, especially as First_Feature_769’s family have paid for Aiden to go on “15+” vacations.

“Was I wrong for trying to draw a parallel between him and Lila?” she asked Redditors.

“I didn’t want to make him feel bad for coming with us on those vacations, I loved having him there. Do I owe him an apology?”

Fellow Reddit users told the poster that she had done nothing wrong, with BlackMetalFan77 calling her boyfriend “extremely hypocritical.”

“Aiden really needs to take a step back and evaluate why he’s getting upset about something that he has no problem taking for himself,” agreed UgoLynnCoco.

However, Hoisteredonyrownpetard wrote that “there’s massive sexism at play.”

“Aidan gives off big incel energy in this story,” the Redditor wrote. “Hating a woman for being likeable and calling her a gold-digger is [a red flag.]”

“Your argument is sound and Aiden is turning it around on you because he’s embarrassed he got caught out with his faulty and misogynistic logic,” posted aurora-leigh.

Others suggested that Aiden is jealous of Lila for no longer “being the most important person in Daniel’s life.”

“Friendship is a strong and complicated feeling too and can get enmeshed and unhealthy sometimes,” wrote Crooked-Bird-0.

“I think he’s had his friend to himself all this time and doesn’t want to be replaced,” commented WidePhotograph2056.

“It could be worth trying to dig deeper with him about where his strong antipathy for Lila comes from so he (and you) can move past it,” Carta_Azul posted. “I think it was very decent of you to defend Lila when she was being unfairly maligned.”

Newsweek reached out to u/First_Feature_769 for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.

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